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Dont think im beaten down.Th is is my take-off po si ti on

So you thought

feminists dont laugh?

NISHA SUSAN

I

m a little baffled when people say femi-

nists have no sense of humour. Id be

less surprised if someone told me femi-

nists laugh too much. To me feminismis not the reasoned explanation that

follows after Ive stopped laughing. It is

the reason Im laughing.

However, I do sympathise with male and

female amateurs who are confused. You have

seen women laughing in the past but you

never thought they were feminists (because if

they were feminists could they have been

laughing?) For future reference heres a

handy guide for L-Board observers of femi-

nism. You might want to cut-and-save it, as

the IIPM ads say.

THE CANT-BELIEVE-YOURE-FOR-REAL LAUGHThis is the most common source of feminist

laughter. Its what cracked me up when Saudi

newspapers reported last week that women

can now ride bikes and buggies. Women are

free to ride bikes in parks, seafronts, among

other areas, providing that they are wearingfully modest dress and a male guardian has to

be present in case of falls or accidents. These

thoughtful suggestions come after years of

Saudi women agitating against the ban

against driving.

Or take Sharanya who is 19 and studies

in a womens college in Bangalore. In Janu-

ary, a student comes to the door of her class

to make an announcement. The college has

organised a protest rally the following day.They are to walk a kilometre to mark the

death of the young Delhi gangrape victim. All

students are expected to participate. All stu-

dents are also expected, the announcement

continued, to be decently dressed. Two

months later, Sharanya still has no words to

express her indignation other than a splutter-

ing and giggling.

A persistent (but perhaps apocryphal)

story has it that in the year 584 a bunch of

bishops met in Lyons, France and decided

that women are not human and have no

souls. If it did happen there was definitely a

lot of this variety of laughter that day.

Note: The cant-believe-youre-for-real

laugh might range from a short snort to

clutching-the-walls-for-support variety. Usu-

ally, its a short snort because we have other

things to do today than hanging around.

THE OMG, YOUVE-NEVER-

READ-ANYTHING GIGGLEThis is how I giggled when, some years ago, I

joined a tiny NGO with three men. I was hired

to run their website. On Day 1 a colleague

asked me to pour out the tea. My colleague

meant no harm and was, genuinely, not being

malicious. It was just that in his world, the act

of asking the only female colleague present to

handle the beverages was not an embarrassing-

ly dated, utterly medieval clich of the My Wife

is The Home Minister vintage. To him, it was

perfectly appropriate. I didnt pour the tea. I

giggled and went on typing. In a while, he

poured all of us tea.

Many feminists and others (its conta-

gious) had this fit of choking laughter recent-

ly when they saw the New York Times obitu-

ary of Yvonne Brill, a scientist who invented a

propulsion system that keeps communicationsatellites in orbit. It began, She made a

mean beef stroganoff, followed her husband

from job to job and took eight years off from

work to raise three children. The worlds best

mom, her son Matthew said. Douglas Mar-

tin, the writer, intended this embarrassing be-

ginning to create excitement when the piece

later revealed that (surprise!) the woman

(surprise!) was a rocket scientist.

After everyone-went-through-the-OMG-

youve-never-read-anything routine, the piece

had to be edited online.

I did think of the power of this variety of

feminist laughter in 2009 when Renu Gora,

an international prize-winning boxer was told

to serve tea, refreshments and wash cups for

random reporters and visiting bureaucrats at

the National Institute of Sports, Patiala. Renu

felt compelled to do as she was told for lots of

reasons. I wished she had laughed and mean-

ingfully stroked her gloves instead.

THE WARNING LAUGHMy friend Lucy specialises in this variety. In

the bus on a sweaty afternoon she grew tired

of the man standing next to her seat and lean-

ing his crotch into her face. She looked up

and uttered this warning laugh, a mere crack.

He must have sensed that her broad, good-hu-

moured face usually did not house these

predatory sounds. He paused in his activity

but he did not move away fast enough. A

minute later, Lucys genial, middle-aged voice

rang loudly through the bus: Take yourmaal

away from my face unless you want me to cut

it off. The man got off the bus.

A-NEEDLE-HIDDEN-INSIDE-THIS-BANANA-THAT-I-LOVINGLY-FEED-

YOU LAUGHThis is a vicious variety and one you should

hope you never see unless you want to be

found dead with your eyes staring in horror.

This is a particularly tough one to spot

because the feminist is likely to be smiling a

fixed smile, soundlessly. It comes without the

warning laugh (see above).

The reason why many people would likefeminists to laugh is not the same reasons

feminist laugh. Other people would like

feminists to laugh so they are easier to like.

They particularly would like women to laugh

along when unfunny things are said so that

they give others permission to continue being

thoughtless jackasses.

Innocuous and bright as summer fruit,

this laugh will fool you into continuing to

do whatever obnoxious thing you are doing

right now (describing a female boss as an

old bitch, talking about how your maid is ex-

ploiting you, about how the maid who was

allegedly raped by Shiney Ahuja should have

been just paid off, why the university

students who said they had been sexually

harassed were definitely paid off, taking

credit for work your female colleagues have

done). You will have no clue the axe is

dangling over your soft, silly neck.

THE THATS-SO-TRUE SMILEThis is a tricky one. Its fleeting and it can go

all the way from a smile to an unplanned, sur-

prised giggle. Often this is when we are think-

ing of our own imperfections and vanities.

Sometimes it is suffused with the warmth of

meeting or reading about someone who has

had the same experience weve had. Its what

you feel when writer Caitlin Moran talks about

oh, anything. Like when she said, To any idiot

who says, You a feminist? Do you burn your

bras, then, huh? HUH? You burn your bras,

you feminist, you must reply calmly, Fool.

FOOL. Bra is my friend. My bosomest buddy.

My inti-mate. Except for that balcony-cup

Janet Reger one that was an inch too small and

cut off the circulation to my head. Yeah. That

one, I covered in gas and torched it outside the

American embassy. Or when she says, When

a woman says, I have nothing to wear! what

she really means is, Theres nothing here for

who Im supposed to be today.

THE IM-SO-PROUD SMILEThis is a cheeky, truly happy one that can run

from the tiny-smile-to-the-rollicking-laugh

spectrum. When we see the little girl once

beaten by her vicious employers now riding

a cycle to school. When your father scolds

the nosy neighbour and says, No, my daugh-

ter is not married. Everyone doesnt need to

get married.

PADMAPARNA GHOSH

TIMES NEWS NETWORK

Why do you think the stereotype of the angry

feminist still endures?

It is because the radical feminism of 70s, the

Andrea Dworkin (a radical American feminist best

known for her tirade against pornography) kind,

really forced itself into the conversation. It was also

very jarring, with the kind of images and language

that they used they were totally foreign. It i s a

very enduring image.

But even more importantly, the real issue is that

this image is sexist. All these women are/were de-

manding change, things need to be fixed and that we

must be angry. But we are not shrieking harridans.

How do you prove that you are not angry? By not be-

ing angry. Sure, we have anger but we dont exist in

this bubble. We are actually pretty happy people.

Laughing is a core human instinct and if you can

make people laugh, then it is the best way to commu-

nicate. Lets take, for instance, a grave topic like

abortion, Caitlin Moran says something funny about

abortion rights and suppose I had a personal experi-

ence with it (abortion) and if both of us can laugh to-

gether at the same thing, it creates a special mo-

ment.

Whether you call yourself a feminist or not, much

of the ideology (of feminism) is ingrained in us. But

the word itself has become undesirable with younger

women. With women today, who are in their early

20s, everything that comes out of their mouth is

feminist but they dont want to be called that. Maybe

we have a branding problem. We have to decide if

this is a branding game. Who knows, 20 years from

now we will be using some other word. We spend so

much time talking about what exactly is feminism

that it kind of defeats the purpose. We spend more

time debating this than the real issues.

Do we need a movement like feminism to be

snarky, edgy to remain relevant with this or

the next generation? Does it make it more

accessible?

Often, laughing along with a joke

changes a mind without the person

even realising it. A joke is easier to

grasp, especially at an emotional level.

Are there some aspects of feminism/gender rights

that can never be joked about?

We actually had a post last year on how to make a

rape joke and whether it can ever be funny, explain-

ing why people say rape jokes are not funny. My opin-

ion is you can make a rape joke but it cannot be

about the victim and the violence. You can joke

about the unfathomable inhumanity of it all. You can

joke about the culture that perpetuates it and make

fun of the rapist. You can make them (the jokes) but

the problem is that the people who are usually mak-

ing these are not talented comedians.

Most feminists do not believe that men should be

part of the movement. What is your opinion? Do

you get a lot of male feedback?

Although we have a predominantly female reader-

ship, a surprising amount of men visit the site daily.

Guys are definitely reading it and sharing it over so-

cial media. It is a cause for women but we cant do

that without men. In the power structure, men are in

power, so, if we are trying to affect change, it will

have to be from the top down. They have to start tak-

ing steps. So many men in my generation (mid-30s)

are very much engaged on this issue on larger plat-

forms and various conversations.

Maybe we have a

branding problem

Smile, snort, grin, giggleand guffaw... the absurdityof sexism can provokeonly one response

Jezebel, one of the mostly widely read feminist blogs,is sassy, irreverent, fun and has had its own share ofis it feminist enough controversies. Jessica Coen,the editor-in-chief of the site that has led the online

estrogen revolution, talks to TOI-Crestabout why

the F word is unpalatable to several young women

Amarsar de papad ve main khandi na/ Tu kar-

dayen aakad ve main saindi na/ Chhadachadak

teri bodi mere haath/ Meri gut tere hath/ Je tu

rakhna hai rakh/ Je tu chhadna hai, chhaad

Idont eat Amritsars papads, I dont take your

attitude either. And if you have my plait in

your grip, I have your top knot in my hand

too. If you want to stick with me, do so or else

go, take a walk. That is a Punjabi bibi sharply be-

rating her philandering husband. If you thought

only an urban woman could take digs at misogy-

ny, its time for a rethink.

Indian folk songs have a long tradition of lay-

ing on the sarcasm thick and strong. Songs sung

on a range of ocassions from weddings to harvest

were remarkably full of subversive stuff and al-

lowed festive license.

Jagori activist Jaya Srivastava, who grew up in

the Bundelkhand region, says that folk songs are

far more blunt and funny about stating the

womans point of view. Laughter has always beenan integral part of folk culture, she says. And

there is a lot of subversion in this humour.

In the Bundeli song,Dil gare atta pe kay

thaari, to the question why do you stand forlorn

in your yard, the singer says the answer is nei-

ther that her husband has ignored her nor that

her mother-in-law is giving her grief. It is that

Maike ke yaar mohe sapte mein dikhe, khaye

hilore, chhaati phate (I am dreaming of my old

lover, and my heart heaves with longing). It cant

get more irreverent than that, says Srivastava.

Many folks songs of UP, Rajasthan, Bihar and

Punjab also have powerful lyrics that help women

vent their angst against the saas, sasur, devar,

jethani, bhabhi. They also portray the wives as

bright but stuck with moronic husbands in re-

pressive clans.

It is temporary catharsis and then the next

day they are back at doing chulha-chakki, says

Kamla Bhasin who has often used these songs,

sometimes remixing them with urban messages,in her work with feminist groups. Malini Nair

BITCHY

BALLADS

you want equalitybecause you want

to oc cu py my pl ace

NO! i want equalitybecause i want youto oc cu py my pl ace

sometimes...

ty place

NO! i wa

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