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TAXI RIDE

I was drivin my taxi one night when I stopped an picked this guy up. Where tobuddy ? I asked as he slipped into the back seat.

I have to go back, he told me.Back where ?Back in time.I glanced at him in the rear-view. Well thats no problem, I told him, but

you realise theres a boundary charge if we leave this century ?Thats okay, he replied. I know an Alchemist.An Alchemist ! I scoffed. All theyre good for is makin lead. I dont take

lead.He laughed. Thats just what Jackie Kennedy said, he told me.Hey, I was related to Jackie Kennedy once, I informed him.Theres no doubt abut that, he remarked, I recognise your hairstyle.Yeah I know - blood suits me, I said dryly.He was silent for a couple of minutes, just starin out the window then he

turned an spoke again. My sister had a kid one time an he couldnt do a thing forhimself because he was a mongol, he told me. They called him Genghis Khant.

Too bad, I sympathised. Mind if I smoke ?Good idea, he replied, tossing a zipped leather pouch onto the passenger

seat next to me. Roll one with mine.I rolled a thick one an we smoked. We sat awhile just smoking an starin out at

the traffic. I noticed a subtle change in the night. Like dimensions were slowlyalterin. I realised this was good weed.

So which century do you want to go back to ? I asked him eventually.Take a wild guess, he told me an started takin off his overcoat.I turned for a look an saw he was wearin the outfit of a Captain in the SS. He

brought out a peaked cap complete with its Deaths Head badge an put it on.Berlin. November 1941. Outside the Reichstag, he instructed. I have to pick

up a package.Okay. When we get there should I wait ? I asked.Yeah, he replied. Keep the engine runnin. I wont be long.I cruised off, headin to the slip-way for the time-travel highway. We smoked

as we drove. I enjoy a smoke when Im drivin at night. How time flies when youreenjoyin yourself. An so it flew. Back the way. Good job I was licensed for time-travel.

Berlin,1941, outside the Reichstag. Swastika flags everywhere. Good naturedNazis prowled the streets, stoppin Jews an tellin them jokes an givin themcigarettes. I was goin to get out for a piss then remembered I was circumcised -Christ, I hate jokes.

We parked an the Captain slipped out into the night.As I sat there waitin, footsteps approached. They stopped at the car an I

glanced up. A guy in a black overcoat flashed his Gestapo badge at me an motionedfor me to roll down the window.

When I did he bent down an conveniently spoke in English. I suffer fromreverse paranoia, he informed me.

What are you paranoid about ? I asked him.I keep thinking Im not being followed, he told me.I glanced back in the direction hed come from - there was no-one around.See what I mean, he said an strolled off.The Captain returned a few minutes later an slipped into the back seat. He

looked relieved. Home, he ordered.Did you collect the package ? I asked him.He patted his overcoat pocket an nodded.I was curious. Whats in it ?Designs for tattoos, he told me. Secret tattoos.How secret ? I asked.

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They have to be done on the inside of the skin, he replied.Makes sense, I said, noddin.Rain started to fall. It was cold, dark an rainy. How I loved nights like

that. I rolled another smoke an decided to take the long way home.