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A world-class mind coach; a mind nutrition expert; a psychological vitamin pill; a trainer in demand... whatever his label, Kevin Abdulrahman is out to inspire millions to achieve their goals.

With all these references, I wasn’t sure what to expect of him. But my first impression is that of a man who is very pleasant, sharply dressed and looks you straight in the eye. When he starts to speak, it’s not surprising that he holds your attention with complete ease. His manner of speaking is clear, intelligent and entertaining. It’s plain to see why people have been giving him their undivided attention.

His talk received an outstanding response when he was the keynote speaker at the UAE 2015 Leadership Plan for Pan Arab leaders at the Capital Club in DIFC last April. Numerous invitations to speak in various parts of the Middle East and Asia followed.

“I think the audiences really identified with me,” he says. Although he appeals to a wide audience, many

young students in the gathering could also relate to Abdulrahman since he’s in his early thirties. “My mantra is simple,” he says. “I believe in offering people my thoughts. If I time it right, they tune in and benefit from them.”

As the eldest of three siblings born to a Yemeni father and an Iranian mother, his family migrated from the UK (where he was born) to New Zealand shortly after the Gulf War. Even as a kid, he was constantly occupied by existentialist issues: why did some kids have it better than others? Why do some people get to enjoy life more than others (with many things being equal)?

And as it happened, his young curiosity received a serendipitous fillip in his teens when he chanced upon a leaflet that had information about a self-improvement course, which was sent to the previous tenant of his house. It was an incident that marked the start of what would become his career and vision. He decided to attend the course and when he completed it, he felt liberated. He decided to

start his own course. Since then there’s been no looking back. Today he not only specialises in one-on-one interactions, he also helps universities, organisations and sports teams to identify and nurture leaders and help them achieve their goals.

Abdulrahman is also frequently called upon to tailor one-on-one executive programmes for corporations. “Many of my clients are already very successful. I provide them with the appropriate input to help iron out the small irritants that hold them back from reaching their absolute potential,” he says.

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i was always frustrated about... the way my family members were leading their lives. We lived in a joint family and although my parents worked very hard, I felt they were not getting their due. I wondered why some kids had all the luxuries in the world and life was a non-stop party for them, while we lived a hand-to-mouth existence. It seemed unfair and I was often left questioning the poor hand life seemed to have dealt us.

I worked at McDonald’s – sometimes up to 80 hours a week to supplement my income. I used to greet the owner who would put in half as many hours as me, but make a lot more money than I did. But one day I knew this would change.

Taking chances

He’s only in his early thirties, but he’s in the business of inspiring others to achieve their true potential. Nargish Khambatta meets life coach Kevin Abdulrahman to find out what motivates him. Photos by Christopher List

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“I provide them with the appropriate input to help iron out the small

irritants that hold them back from reaching their absolute potential”

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i developed the attitude of Will Smith’s character in Gabriele Muccino’s film The Pursuit of Happyness. It was like an epiphany. ‘What is it that you do? And how do you do it?’ After watching that movie, I never felt the inertia of inaction. I was no longer afraid of trying for fear of failing. My definition of failure underwent a drastic redefinition. I realised that different people have different yardsticks by which they measure failure and success. Essentially, failure and success are two sides of the same coin.

i was expected to be the role model for my two younger siblings. My mom used to dream of becoming a doctor. When she could not fulfil her dream, she transferred her ambition on to me and hoped that I would become a doctor. In those days, most parents could not think beyond law, medicine or engineering as career

options for their children. But I didn’t want to spend so many years of my life studying medicine. I really didn’t see myself fitting this mould. Nevertheless, I opted for the next best thing – a degree in health sciences.

I also happened to pick a few business and management courses while I was at university, and found that I had a natural aptitude for management. I used to get really good grades in those subjects with minimal effort. i was more of a ‘learn from experience’ type of person. I decided to just go out there and do something that wouldn’t require me to be in a classroom studying.

But what I didn’t realise was that to win in the game of life, I would always have to be a student of the game.

Initially it wasn’t by choice, but as I saw the power in constantly learning, I began to love it – every single word and action. I soaked it all up like a dry sponge.

I cherished and valued everything that I learned. However, the fact that I was doing well was starting to make me feel a bit arrogant. I began to think I possessed a power that others didn’t.

But after experiencing a

few hard lessons, I climbed down from my high horse.

i was selling credit cards back then to earn pocket money. I started applying what I was learning in my business courses to my work and I did well. I graduated at 21 and immediately wanted to land a dream job at a pharmaceutical company.

I thought I could nimbly pick my way to the top of the heap and saw myself retiring young after a stint at being the CEO! What happened instead was that I lost out in the very first interview as they thought I was too young to even apply for the job.

Frustration crept in and I was left searching for answers. I had no one whom I considered a mentor, no one had taught me how to develop the right attitude or how to deal with failure. These were things I learnt on my own along the way. But today, part of my vision is to help people become more aware of how to deal with the issues that life is bound to throw at them, even as they’re putting themselves through the paces academically. i am a strong believer in... serendipity. One day, I received a letter that was addressed to someone else and I absent-mindedly opened it. It

i , me, myself

“What I didn’t realise was that to win the

game of life, I would always have to be a

student of the game.”

It’s important to acknowledge the true value of knowledge... “I grew through learning and everything I learned every day simply sharpened my tools,” says Abdulrahman

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was a newsletter and carried an advertisement for a job that said, ‘Would you like to make $100,000 (about Dh367,000) a year?’ Happily for me, I had just the right qualifications to apply for it.

I began doing very well. I was transferred to Australia and became a branch manager and life was great, but I was burning out. I had no sense of job satisfaction. So I decided to venture into real estate, but that offered me no satisfaction either.

i took a step back at that point in time to review my life. I changed my definition of success. I studied the mantras of successful people like Richard Branson. I invested a lot of money in my own training and development. I spent a lot of time writing down my thoughts. I was going way beyond the confines of academic knowledge.

And suddenly people I had never met started responding to my writing. They were moved by my thoughts and words; I seemed to be able to strike a chord with others. They kept

writing in with queries and seeking advice. My inbox was constantly flooded. I seemed to have found my calling. I loved what I was doing. My work involves a lot of travel and I have been to the US, Europe and Australia.

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me and my publishersMy initial experience with publishers was not very pleasant, but I learned a lot in the process; the experiences tested my belief in myself. I went to over 100 publishers and was turned down by every one of them. I needed to take my own advice – to hang in there and persevere.

And it worked! Finally, a publisher saw that I had written something worth reading and sharing. Since I see life as a game, I gave my book the title Winning the Game of Life, which details the 19 ‘secret weapons’ that, where used effectively, would help one master the game.

After that, I wrote two other books: Winning Everyday and Whatever You’re Into.

me and my journey of lifeIt hasn’t been easy, but I have a sense of gratification when people walk up to me or e-mail me saying I have made a difference in their lives. me and my advice for othersKeep an open mind and you will be amazed at what you can learn from one another. Every one of us has a different experience, so we all have something unique to offer. There’s always room for improvement in everything we do. Constantly learn to grow even if it costs you your ego and more so if it does! i, me, myself

What is your advice for people who are already at the top of their profession and feel that they know it all? Harold Coffin, a columnist, once said:

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“I changed my definition of success. I wanted to work on my own time and have

enough time to reflect and do the things I want,”

says Abdulrahman

I seemed to be able to strike a chord with others. I realised that I had a gift

for reaching out to people.

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“The fellow who thinks he knows it all is especially annoying to those of us who do.” Here is something to be aware of that will also help you grow: when someone is talking to you, and you say, ‘I know’ or ‘I’ve heard this already,’ you have subconsciously shut yourself off from learning.

Sometimes people do very well early in life and fall in the ‘know it all’ trap. This is a dangerous state to be in as it’s easy to get stuck in a rut. Socrates once said: “The moment you think that you know it all, will be the moment of your downfall.” If you are reading this thinking, ‘Oh, I know this’, you’re in danger of falling into that rut.

Every day brings about its own mystery, so taking any day for granted would be unwise. Always work with the belief that every day, you’ll learn at least one new thing that can help you move ahead in both your business and in your personal life.

What is your vision? I believe in the old adage that to ‘give a man a fish, you’ve fed him for a day; teach a man how to fish and you’ve fed him for life.’

I aspire to help individuals create whatever they truly want from their life by helping them to identify and develop the tools that they’ll need to achieve it.

Do you think today’s youth should listen to the voice of experience or follow their own inner voice? Which will lead them down the right path?I know that in numerous cultures, the older generation don’t listen to young people and vice versa. I urge people not to do this. Today’s youth are more empowered with the tools of technology. I’m not for a minute saying that technology can replace conventional wisdom or the voice of experience, but yes, I do believe that today’s youth are more savvy compared to other generations. They have a different kind of power to grasp information and in the process have discovered a wisdom that is yielding a unique power. As George Bernard Shaw said, “I do not believe that youth is wasted on the young.”Kevin Abdulrahman can be reached on http://www.KevInspire.com or info@MeetWithKevin.com

– Nargish Khambatta is a Dubai-based freelancer

KeViN’s TiPs

By Kevin Abdulrahman, author of the book Winning the Game of Lifen Your life is not about your past. Your life is about who you choose to be and what you choose to do right now.n It’s the small changes you make that give you sizeable results.n Success demands audacity.n Passion backed by commitment is your admission ticket to success.n Before you can effectively communicate with another person, you must learn to effectively communicate with yourself.

n Hard work leads to a painful existence. Smart work leads to profits.n The quality of the help you get depends on the quality of questions you ask.n Your persistence must outlast the resistance.n It is not that most people can’t, it is simply that most people don’t know how. n The quality of your life is determined by your attitude towards it.n Life is a constant battle for most, but an adventure for those with a winning mind.n Don’t let your fears steal your dreams.n Don’t be the person who stares at life. Be the person who lives it.n The result you have

today is the sum of the actions you have taken, and the actions you should have taken. n You will have whatever you desire in life when your reasons become stronger than your excuses.n We all experience failure. It’s not the failure of self, more so, a failure of method.n Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday... why do people use one day and someday when they know such days don’t exist.n When someone doubts you, double your effort.n Failure is never permanent unless you choose for it to be so.

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