SUPERCHARGED RETIREMENT excerpt

8/14/2019 SUPERCHARGED RETIREMENT excerpt

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Ditc t Rockin Cir,

Trs t Rmot,

nd Do Wt Yo Lov

Rtirmnt

SupeR-

ChaRgeD

M a R Y L L OY D


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m a r y l l oy d

Hankfritz Press


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Published by Hankriz Press

PO Box 65587

Universiy Place, WA 98464-5587

.mining-silver.com

(253) 208-0059

Copyrigh 2009 Mary LloydAll righs reserved.

No par o his book may be reproduced, sored in a rerieval sysem, or

ransmied by any means, elecronic, mechanical, phoocopying, recording,

or oherise, ihou rien permission rom he publisher.

Disribued by Greenlea Book Group LLC

For ordering inormaion or special discouns or bulk purchases, please conac

Greenlea Book Group LLC a PO Box 91869, Ausin, X 78709, 512.891.6100.

Cover design by Greenlea Book Group LLCInerior design and composiion by Kahryn E. Campbell

ISBN 13: 978-0-9798319-3-5

ISBN 10: 0-9798319-3-8

Library o Congress Conrol Number: 2008907834

Par o he ree Neural program, hich oses he number o

rees consumed in he producion and prining o his book by

aking proacive seps, such as planing rees in direc proporion

o he number o rees used: .reeneural.com

Prined in he Unied Saes o America on acid-ree paper

09 10 11 12 13 14 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

Firs Ediion


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iv

Cntents

Acknoledgmens . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .vii

IntroductIon:

A Fe Preliminary Remarks. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

chapter one:

Ou he Door and Over he Cli. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

c h a p t e r t w o :

ools or Excavaing Your Lie. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

chapter three:

Combing Your Personal Beach . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

chapter Four:

Nus and Bols and Oher Physical Su . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

chapter FIve:

Menal Monkey Bars . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .


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v

chapter SIx:

Marshmallos, Icicles, and Prickly Tings in he Dark. . .

chapter Seven:

Managing Zucchini . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

chapter eIght:

Cu Lis or he Whole Enchilada . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

chapter nIne:

Choose Your On Advenure . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Chaper Noes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

From Here, Tere, and EveryhereOher Resources . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Index . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .


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1

Intuctin:

a Few Peiin

reks

when you can afford not to work all day every day, he realprize is no he leisure. Is he chance o begin again in a direcion ha

reecs ho youve become. I ook me an excruciaingly long ime o

gure ha ouhich is hy my pah includes riing his book. I I canhelp even one person ge o he good su aser, I ill be pleased.

Once e reire, he vas majoriy o us become virually invisible. Were

sereoyped as ou o shape, in need o huge amouns o medical aenion,

and ocused on grandchildren and nding he righ reiremen commu-

niy. Te expecaion o our culure is ha is only a maer o ime unil

e ill be a burden o our children and o sociey in general. Tose paying

ino Social Securiy ih dollars hey ould raher have or hemselvesbelieve e already are.

Tis is hogash, o course, bu commonly held hogash. We need

o shed ligh on he real opions or people ho have reached he poin

here hey no longer have o ork. We need o see he ruhha hen

you leave, you may have as much o your lie le o live as you spen in

he orkorce. People are living o . Acing like everyhing is over

hen you urn is ridiculous. Bu sociey assumes e are done oncepresened ih he gold ach and he gag gis.


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2

Teres so much lie le in us hen e reach his poin. Teres so

much o gain by claiming i. I e live our lives auhenically aer e

reire, e ill be healhier physically, emoionally, spiriually. Bu, more

imporanly, e ill be on re ih lie. Ta re can ligh he ay, arm

hears, and ge a lo o good su cooking.

We need o change he ay e underake his ransiion. Our assump-

ions and expecaions o he years aer e reire need o changeindi-

vidually and as a sociey. Tose o us ho have goen ha ar, need o

sand up and say condenly, No, has no me a all. And hen go ou

and be ho e really are.

Tis book is designed o help ligh ha ne pah. Is here o help you a-

rm ho you are noho youve become over all hese yearsso you

can make reiremen decisions ha keep you vibran and energized. Is

here o debunk he myhs abou has possible and o lay he ground-

ork or your on bes lie.

Te chapers are airly sel-explanaory. In he rs hree, e go rom

exploring he general idea, o he ools ha ill serve you bes, and hen

on o a preliminary run a gahering inormaion abou ho you are and

has imporan o you. From here e go ino our specialized sec-

ionsphysical consideraions and hen, in succeeding chapers, menal,

emoional, and spiriual aspecs. Te grand nale is a comprehensive as-

sessmen chaper o help you ry o eave i all ogeher. Don panic i you

aren ready or ha chaperor i you decide o do i again and again or

laer. Te purpose o he book is o help you gure ou here you are

and here you an o go nex. We aren all going he same place and

e aren raveling a he same speed. Be yourselbu say accounable.

No one is going o do his or you. I guaranee i.

Each chaper also has a predicable srucure. Tey sar ih a discus-

sion o he opic ha dras on diverse sourcessor o a ravelogue o he


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3

erriory youll be in or ha chaper. Te sudies and quoes menioned

are elaboraed on in he Chaper Noes a he end o he book. Te second

par provides a series o exercises aimed a helping you gaher inorma-

ion abou yoursel on ha opic. Youll ge a lo more ou o his i you

do hem. Really.

Te las secion is anecdoal. Consider i your reard or puing all

ha ork ino he assessmen su. Tis par is my soryor he par o i

ha relaes o he opic a hand. Someimes is nice o kno someone else

has screed i up orse han you ever could. Ive prey much done ha

on all rons ih his ransiion. Feel ree o learn rom my misakes.

My sinceres ish is ha he book akes you o he exciemen o his

sage o lie. We are no done. Many o us are barely sared. Our ime aer

reiremen is ull o poenial. Our alens and our energy are sill here

o use. Tere is no la keeping us on he benchor in he rocking chair.

We are he ones making he choices. We need o nd ha e believe in

and do i. Teres a lo o un ye o be had. A lo o good ye o be done.

Your personal piece o ha is aiing or you o gure i ou. Welcome o

he grandes o all lies advenures.


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6

or grading papers. No more having o accep someone elses righ o de-

cide ho youre going o spend huge chunks o your ime. And, o course,

no more sress. Jus hour aer lovely hour o doing haever you an.

Or so he anasy goes. Is he anihesis o planning.

Te idea ha you ork unil you are or (or henever your birh

year esablishes you as eligible ih he Social Securiy Adminisraion)

and hen jus sop and go o and play is our curren Big Lie as a sociey.

Is no has happening or, more imporanly, ha needs o happen or

everyones good. rue, some are volunarily orking longer beore ever

aking reiremen. Bu nearly a quarer o he orkers ho say hey are

reired sill ork eiher ull or par ime. According o a sudy done by

Merrill Lynchs reiremen group, o hirds o Americans claim hey ill

do some kind o ork or pay in reiremen.

A he same ime, ageism is real and coninues o be pervasive, ac-

cording o Dr. Rober Buler, o he Longeviy Cener in Ne York, hos

been sudying i since . Deermining he ork you an o do or pay

aer reiremen and nding i ill involve an enirely dieren sraegy

and process han e used ou o high school or even in he donurns o

he las e decades. Bu ork e mus. Work is abou more han money

and e need i in some orm o hrive. As a naion, e are jus no sar-

ing o realize his.

Do I have to?

More and more, hose saring o hink abou reiremen are asking i is

even ha hey really an. Usually, heres somehing ha makes coninu-

ing in he curren ork siuaion unappealing. Ofce poliics. Te com-

mue. A desire o live somehere else. Bu here are also hings abou he

lie o ease suggesed as reiremen ha are orrisome. Jus ho good

can you ge a doing nohing? And ho good do you an o be?

Is he nex sep simply no orking? Or do you an o redesign your

lie so i conains everyhing you an in he proporions you preer


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7

personally? Are you looking or a rocking chair or a launching pad? A

nap or an advenure?

In a recen aricle, Rosabeh Moss KanerHarvard managemen pro-

essor and corporae gurunoed ha hose no on he brink o reiring

are no likely o make his ransiion quiely as a group. Having been

old rom birh abou heir on signicance [hanks in a large par o he

advice o Dr. Benjamin Spock], hey aren going o eel less signican

simply because heyve hi a career ceiling called reiremen age. She cies

research done by Me Lie and Civic Venures here he majoriy o he

Americans beeen and ho ere asked said hey aned o bene

heir communiies in some ay ih ha hey do ih heir ime and/or

or a living a his poin in heir lives. Tis is only one o he dierences

beeen our veneraed image o he golden years and he realiy o ha

hey ill be like once he baby boom seps ino hem.

Reiremen is he rong ord alogeher. Reire per good old Web-

sers is o ihdra rom acion or danger: REREA; o move back:

RECEDE; o ihdra rom circulaion or he marke: RECALL. Why

ould anybody an o do ha a he op o heir game? Why ould

anyone an o do ha everunless hey ere sick, ired, or boh?

Good quesion. Bu his is a ne paradigm, and he anser is sill in

he orks. For he ime being, hose o us asking are going o have o

gure i ou or ourselves. And since, by his poin in our lives, e are all

incredibly unique, he ansers aren going o be he same or all o us.

Ta ill be rue even hen he resources and roadmaps needed o do

his smoohly are in placehich hey aren ye.

Tese ansers are probably no going o be easy o gure ou or you

specically eiher. Why should hey be? You migh be looking a as much

as or percen o your oal lie span in ha remains. Wha do you

an o do ih all ha? Wha is imporan o ge done? And ho do you

an o go abou i? Ho do you LIKE o do hings?

Tese are he more imporan quesions abou reiremen. Te poin

a hich you are ell enough o o give up a regular job and rely on he


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8

sources o income youve secured ha don require your hours and days is

no really reiremen. Is jus anoher graduaionlike high school and

college. Congraulaions! You have me all he requiremens o be alloed

o move on o he nex level o lie. Like all graduaions, his involves a

commencement. A beginning.

We are no looking a old age hen e urn . I Hugh Hener is

righ, is he ne . (And yes, he is sill living like hes and he

king oPlayboy, rom he sound o i.) In her book, Dont Stop the Career

Clock, Helen Harkness suggess ha he poin a hich e are usually

looking a reiremen opions is acually he second midlie. Reiring

provides he chance o exi he curren ork siuaion graceullyusually

ih a leas a parial nancial saey neand begin again, reconnecing

ih calling as he compass or charing a ne course. She reers o his

ransiion o more meaningul ork as he capsone career.

I believe i goes arher han ha. For many o us, his phase o our

lives ill involve more han one career and more han one direcion,

perhaps even simulaneously. Tese are he bes years, characerized by

acion, direcion, and passion. And a big dose o exibiliy. I is he ime

o our lives here ha e do nex can make a proound posiive dier-

ence i e so choose and e have he energy, samina, and ocus o make

ha happen. I is also he ime o our lives here e oe i o sociey

o model balance in ho e go abou i. Te years are he bes because

e do good hings or ohers, bu hey are also he bes because e have

designed a qualiy liesyle or ourselves. We do ha e an, bu ha

includes doing good.

For many, ha good is likely o be on a paid basis. People ho ge

paid o do hings end o have more clou and more credibiliy han hose

acing as voluneers. Work also provides a beer rameork or ocus

and goal seing. Bu i on look like he ork e are leaving.

We ill no do -hour orkeeks on a regular basis, bu e may push

ha hard or a e days o ge a specic projec hrough a criical phase.

Ten ell ake a monh o o hike a Moun Rainier or sail he Sea oCorez or help a niece ho lives miles aay deal ih neborn ins.


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9

Well ocus our experience and ell-honed managemen and leadership al-

ens on haever projec eve agreed o ge done. Bu e ill also explore

he onders o Egyp or ake a class in making ar glass. Tis is he ime

o creae beauiul lives. Meaningul lives in erms o our on uniqueness.

Lives ha give hose sill rudging along in sandard career mode inspira-

ion o keep going. I is no abou giving up ork. Is abou orking a

ha e an, a ha e hink is imporan and hereore orh doing.

I is also abou shaping he ork e choose so i doesn exclude he oher

hings e an in our lives.

No every one ill an his choice. Some people really are ired and

don an o have o orry abou anyhinga leas or a hile. Some

people ill reire and on decide hey need more meaning in heir lives

unil several years or even decades aer hey leave he orkorce. Te

beauy o his ne dan is ha is no a one size mus all siuaion.

Is no even a one size s he same person orever siuaion. I you have

he money o lie on he beach year round and has ha you an o do,

is your call. Nobody is going o ell you o go back o ork. I you an o

lie on he beach his year and ge involved in making an inner ciy youh

program nancially sable nex year, is sill your call.

ake hear i you have he chance o reire and are hesiaing. Tere is

so much le. So much o explore. So much o learn. So much o become

par o and make happen. Te sereoype suggess here is nohing ou

here bu cruise ours and gol. Bu is really a maer o personal choice.

Te key is guring ou ha he bes version o his ime in your lie looks

like or you. Wha excies you? Wha brings you saisacion? Ho do you

like o learn hings? Wha do you an o learn? Is ime o roll up your

sleeves. As Dr. Seuess advises, Youre o o Grea Places. oday is your

day! Your mounain is aiing. Soget on your way!

Tere is, hoever, a cavea. Te model is sill under consrucion. Many

o he resources e need o gure i ou don exis. Ye. Many o he asks

ha e could do ell and o socieys bene haven been dened. Ye.

Te landmarks are sill in he mis. We ill have o explore hem individu-ally and up close or a hile beore hey become par o a readily available


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map. Even his is ing. Te olks preparing o sar his advenure are he

leading edge boomershose ho gre up in he s. Te olks ho

brough youor beer and/or orseVienam War proess, civil righs

marches, and ree love. A group Kaner describes as naurally eeling like

orld changers. Only his ime around, hey are eeering on he brink o

isdom. Me is less o an issue no. Us is in.

d I Hve Enugh Ceits?

harD facts Deal breakers

Giving up ork, as a Briish riend describes i, is a uniquely personal

decision. I is also a uniquely complex one. Te ramicaions aec every

single area o your lierom he obvious ones like nances o he less

apparen ones like healh and relaionships.

A recen aricle in US News & World Reportnoed ha in erms o

cold cash, orking longer is a nancial ha rick. You have more years in

hich o save or reiremen. You have eer years here you ill have

o live o your savings. And you ill be able o dra a larger paymen

rom Social Securiy once you enroll. As a bonus, you can also keep your

healhcare coverage longer. Bu a some poin, is ime o sop.

Someimes, his momen is dened by exernal orces. Per AARP,

percen o us ill reire unexpecedly, eiher because o healh problems

or company changes. You migh be caugh in a donsizing or a realign-

men o business. You migh be in he perec posiion o sell he business

youve buil a a handsome price i you ac immediaely. You migh be

orced o reire because youve reached a mandaory age, as airline pilos

are. Exernal orces make he iniial decision easieroen is no even

yours. Bu he ork o ge i righ once you go over he cli is he same.

Bu ha i his is your decision? No one is pushing you ih a RIF

or a buy-ou or a managemen shake-up. Youre jus saring o eel Is

ime or somehing else. Ho do you decide i you are ready and i you

really an o?


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11

Te rs issue, is, o course, he economics. Do you have enough mon-

ey? Tere are enough books, seminars, and consulans o ork hrough

his quesion imes over. So e ill no dell on i here. Bu i is he

iniial deal breaker. You have o have enough o live on. I you are mor-

gaged o he hil, have credi card deb ha ill ake years o pay o even

a your curren income level, and no plan or a reiremen career in

place, you need o keep doing ha youre doing. Or else nd oher, more

saisying ork you can coninue o do on a ullime basis.

I you do have enough money, he quesion becomes do you WAN

o reire?

Te rs branch on his par o he decision ree is do you like ha

you are doing? Does i sill excie you? Is i an area ha you could ork

in unil he very las day o your lie and eel good ha i as ho you

spen all your ime? I he anser is no and you kno you can reire i you

an o, maybe is ime o graduae o somehing has more un, more

ineresing, and leaves you more on re a he end o he day.

I he anser is yes, hen on o he nex quesion. Is he ou you are

currenly orking or he place o do his ork? Is i supporive? Do hey

appreciae ha you can do and give you he chance o do i ell? Do you

eel like you are orking o your ull poenial in he assignmens youre

given? I he anser is no, hen i may sill be ime o reire, bu o reinven

yoursel in he same eld in a ay ha gives you more room o gro.

Te nex quesion considers he conex youre orking in. Are he

company youre orking or and he ork you are doing or i sable? Is

his job going o be around indeniely? For example, he opions markes

are moving oard elecronic rading. I you make your living in open

oucry aciviies in a rading pi, don bank on having he same job or

anoher years.

I you love ha you do and ho you do i or and he siuaion is no

going o change anyime soon, you don need reiremen, you need o

play he loery. Te vas majoriy o us are no ha lucky.

Tere are oher iniial deal breakers. For example, legal consideraions.You could be under a conrac ha requires you o nish ou or ace a


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si penaly. Tere could be amily issues. Do you need he healh insur-

ance no o change righ no because o a amily members siuaion? My

lacrosse-playing son required knee surgery hen I as making my deci-

sion. As long as I sayed ih he company, he as ully covered or he

procedure. Delaying my deparure unil he could have he knee repaired

made perec sense.

touchy feely factors

Facual consideraions end o ocus on hy NO o reire. Can aord i.

Can ge he company scholarship or my daugher i I do, ec. Te nex

se o quesions deals ih hy you DO an o reire. Tey are liesyle

quesions. Te ork pace and sress level in our employmen culure can

be obscene or donrigh lehal. I he only hing you are doing is your job

because has all you have he ime and energy or, is ime o leave i is

easible or you o reire. (Unless, o course, you love your ork so much

ha is all you wanto do.)

Does ha you are doing no give you room o do all he oher hings

ha are imporan o you? Are he hours reasonable enough o le you

mainain your physical healh, amily ies, and personal social conacs? Do

you ravel abou as much as youd like or he job and or un? I no, his is

he ime o lie here you can creae your on version o a job/lie mix.

Where are you geing your emoional suppor? Where are you geing

your sense o communiy and belonging? Where are you geing your

creaive saisacion? Wha level o aciviy do you need o eel saised?

Ho much ne do you need in your lie?

Tis is here hings can mel don quickly. Mos o us have unc-

ioned in he realm o acs and quaniable aspecs in ha e do or a

living. Te idea o being able o describe ha you like, an, and need

seems counerinuiive. I I like i, I don need o even hink abou iis

jus here. No exacly.

In he movie Te Runaway Bride Richard Gere accuses Julia Roberso knoing so lile abou hersel ha she can even ell him ho she likes


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14

hose assignmens. I hope he Tink and Do secions o his book generae

ha same sense o advenure or you.

Imporan decisions arran eecive decision-making and ha you

an o do ih he res o your lie is a very imporan decision. Te le-

giimacy o inormaion used is one o he keys o good decisions. We are

bombarded ih inormaion and persuasion dressed as advice day and

nigh. Hoever, he decisions o be made abou reiremen are bes made

rom inormaion youll never see on elevision or nd on he Inerne. I

needs o come rom ihin you. Tis seems like i should be easy, bu is

no. Te volume o exernal inormaion e are subjeced o buries he

inernal inormaion and makes i hard o access ih cerainy.

You may have already ansered all he quesions abou heher or no

you are in a posiion o reire ih oal accuracy. In ac, you may have al-

ready jumped o ha cli and are no saring o look a heher is ha

you an o keep doing. Eiher ay, is good o double check o be sure you

are orking ih accurae inormaion. Is ay oo easy o use hinking

ha came rom oher people or he media and believe is really your on.

Your decisions abou ha you an o do ih you lie need o be based

on ho you are hen here is no one and nohing inuencing you.

o ge you sared, his chaper oers some career-specic Tink and

Do. Tese exercises go beyond he yes/no ansers o he decision ree e

jus en hrough and explore your on realiy more horoughly. Te job

o Tink and Do, as ell use i here, is o gaher inormaion rom inside

you and organize i in a ay ha helps make your pah o imporan deci-

sions more sraighorard. Te more sincere and open you are in doing

he exercises, he more relevan, accurae and useul he inormaion ill

be. Ta said, doing hem ih your sense o humor urned on is also im-

poran. Teres more han salad dressing and beer has bes done lie i

e an o live healhy.

Yes, yes, I kno. You hae ha ouchy eely, inrospecive su. You

don an o dell on ho aul i as o be he las kid chosen or he


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15

kickball game in hird grade or having o visi your grea grandmoher in

he nursing home hen you ere sixeen. I don eiher. Which is good,

because has no here his is going a all. Bu youre going o need in-

ormaion o ge his projec going righ and youre he one ho has i.

Tink and Do is an easy ay o pull i ou and look a i.

In all he chapers, he Tink and Do exercises are abou NOW. Abou

your curren prioriies and values. Abou ha you like, don like, and

migh like because o ho youve gron o be. I promise I ill no ask

you o do a imeline o your lie, dra picures o your pe ih your non-

dominan hand, or rie a lis o all he people you need o orgive or ask

orgiveness o. You can do all ha su i you an, bu is no ha e

need or his. Whas essenial or hese decisions is o learn as much as

you can abou you as you exis here and no.

Chaper Ones Tink and Do involves o dieren ays o look a

your ork siuaion. Also, since some readers are likely o have already

le he orkorce, here are o versions o hese o exercises. Beore

he Door is or hose ho are sill employed bu hinking abou reire-

men. Aer he Cli is or hose already reired ho an o explore

ne opions. In boh, he bes ansers are he rs onesbeore you sar

o hink and say ha ould sound good, look good, or be he bes hing

o have said i your spouseor bossever ound your ansers.

I you an complee securiy, rip he pages ou and shred hem once

youve learned ha you need o kno. On he oher hand, i you an

o alk abou i ih your broher, moher, spouse, eldes son, or he nex

person in line a he grocery sore once you discover hese personal ouch-

sones, ha orks, oo.

And do hem as un. Tis is an exploraion o errain ha should be

especially ineresing o you. Go a i like a kid on a neighborhood ad-

venure. Tink and Do runs on o levels here. I an you o hink and

do he exercises, sure. Bu has only so ha you can hink and do has

needed or you o live a lie ha has you smiling mos o he ime.


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16

VErSIoN a: Befe the d

For those still in the workorce.

exi 1.1athIs Job aND thIs coMPaNy

Rate each o the ollowing statements in terms o how accurate

it is or you on this job at this point in time. Put a number between

1 and 9 in the open box o each statement.

ratINg values

n ll lik m: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 : tlly m

What I do in my job is important.

Other people think I have the perect job.

I like the exibility the company gives me.

I need more time or mysel to stay healthy.

Even ater a hard day, Im excited about my work.

My spouse is very proud o me or having this job.

Im proud o the company I work or.

There is a lot o negative stress on this job.

This job gives me un challenges to meet.

Most o my riends are coworkers.

My company appreciates me.

I need to know more than I do about whats going

on at work.

The work I do on this job is interesting.

The people I work with are

the most important part o this job.

This company is nancially sound.

Management here doesnt care what workers think.


26/45

17

What I do on my job is good

or people and society.

This job has high prestige and I like that.

I enjoy the teamwork and work environment at this

company.

I eel like a raud and a cheat to be doing this work.

TOTALS: Total the numbers in each column.

The highest possible score or a column is 45.

The lowest is 5.

Te rs column deals ih your saisacion level ih he kind o

ork you do. I his score is high, you are doing ork ha has meaning

or you. I you an o reire, graduaing o an arrangemen ha gives

you he chance o coninue doing his kind o ork bu ih enhanced

liesyle elemens you value (e.g. eer hours, ork schedule exibiliy,

more vacaion ime, ec.) migh be a good sraegy.

Te second column deals ih social acors. I his score is high, i means

you are likely o be aeced by he loss o social conacs and he presige

you or your amily/riends value in he posiion you no hold. Finding oher

ays o ll his need ill be an imporan par o your ransiion i you

choose o reire.

Te hird column looks a ho you eel abou he company you ork

or. I column one is high and column hree is lo, you may no an o

reire a all, bu raher change companies. I column hree is high and

column one is lo, going in a ne direcion ihin he company migh

be orh looking a, paricularly i you can negoiae enhanced liesyle

elemens. I you leave he company, you ill be losing ha srong sense o

belonging. You may need o nd oher sources o saisy his need.

Te ourh column is a quick read on overall job dissaisacion. Tis

is dieren han simply being lo on saisacion scores. Dissaisacion

acors are ypically sources o negaive sress, hich can cause illness. I

his score is high, leaving is likely o eel like emancipaion.


27/45

18

exi 1.2ashootINg froM the hIP

Answer these with the frst thing that comes

into your mind (including smart remarks and jokes).

The thing I like most about the job Im doing now is __________________

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

I I did this or a diferent employer ________________________________

______________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

The thing I dislike about what I am doing now is _____________________

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

I I knew I could take six months to do whatever I want and then come

back to this job ________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

I I could take a year of and had this job to come back to ______________

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

I I did take six months or a year, my eelings about the job would _____

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

I I knew that whatever I tried was going to turn out exactly as I need a

want it to ___________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________


28/45

19

I I knew my amily and important riends would approve o anything I

decided to do _________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

I could do this job until the day I die i ____________________________

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

When I think about leaving this job ________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

Sentence completion exercises oten yield unexpected inormation.

Go back and look at your replies. I any o them surprise you

enough to dig deeper, try the ollowing:

The answer about ___________surprises me because _______________

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

My answer about ______________excites me because ______________

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

I your initial reply was a joke or a smart remark

and you want to dig deeper, you can try

When I said that, it was a way to __________________________________

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________

I am surprised I can make a joke about that because _________________

______________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________


29/45

20

VErSIoN B: afte the Cliff

For those who have already let the workorce.

exi 1.1bthe realIty of free fall

Rate each o the ollowing statements in terms o how accurate

it is or you at this point in time. Put a number between 1 and 9

in the open box o each statement.

ratINg values

n ll lik m: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 : tlly m

I am totally comortable with how I use my time.

Not having money coming in bothers me.

I eel isolated now that I dont have work

as a way to connect.

I could help many ways but no one will let me

do what I can.

I love being able to putter all day long.

I worry that I am going to run out o money.

I dont have people that I consider

good riends to do things with.

I eel invisible.

I like not having to make plans or what I do each day.

I am not willing to spend money or things

I used to buy readily.

I eel isolated.

It bothers me that I am not contributing in some way.

My retirement could not be better.

I worry about the stock market and/or the security

o my pension.

No one wants all the skills and

experience I am ready to ofer.


30/45

21

Theres got to be more than this.

I would not change a thing about my lie in retirement.

I need more cash coming in than I have now.

I want to be more involved with other people.

I need something to make me want to get out o

bed every day.

TOTALS: Total the numbers in each column.

The highest possible score or a column is 45.

The lowest is 5.

Te rs column deals ih your saisacion level ih reiremen in

general. I his score is high, he liesyle you are living orks. A mos, you

are likely o an o eak i a bi, bu major changes may no be necessary.

Ten again, you may be deluding yoursel abou ho much you like reire-

men. Go or a alk by yoursel and hink abou i i you aren sure.

Te second column deals ih ho you eel abou your curren nan-cial siuaion. Tough your nancial siuaion may have deerioraed or

some reason, concerns o his ype are oen no a reecion o he acual

sae o your nances. For many people, spending he money has been

savedeven i ha is exacly ha i as saved oris very difcul. I

his number is high, nding a ay o creae even a small cash o rom

acive income migh be appealing

Te hird column deals ih social acors. I his score is high, imeans you need more social conac han your curren liesyle includes.

Work is only one ay o lling his se o needs and your personaliy has

a lo o do ih ha is likely o ork bes. For example, i you preer o

alk shop as a ay o inerac ih people, ork is probably a beer

han joining a social club. Bu i you like o dance or play cards o share

ime ih ohers, hen he reverse is more likely o be rue.

Te ourh column is abou ho much meaning you nd in your lie.I his number is high, you may be eeling hollo or resless. Te only


31/45

22

ay o solve his one or good is o uncover your purposehe hing ha

you an o do ih your lie ha leaves you eeling excied no maer

ho ired you are aer orking a i or he day. Purpose and passion go

hand in hand. I you kno ha you are here o do, is a lo easier o ge

ou o bed in he morning.

exi 1.2b.shootINg IN MIDaIr

Answer these with the frst thing that comes into your mind

(including smart remarks and jokes).

The thing I like most about being retired is _________________________

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

The thing I didnt expect about retirement is _______________________

_____________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________

The money thing _____________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

I I had known retirement was going to be like this __________________

____________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________

My choices about how I spend my time ___________________________

____________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________

My volunteer experience _______________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________


32/45

23

I I had to do it again, I would ___________________________________

____________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________

My lie would be perect i______________________________________

____________________________________________________________

___________________________________________________________

My lie would be almost perect i________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

For me, the word retirement means _____________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

Sentence completion exercises oten yield unexpected inormation.

Go back and look at your replies. I any o them surprise you

enough to dig deeper, try the ollowing:

The answer about ___________ surprises me because ______________

____________________________________________________________

My answer about ___________ excites me because ________________

____________________________________________________________

I your initial reply was a joke or a smart remark

and you want to dig deeper, you can try

When I said that, it was a way to _________________________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________

I am surprised I can make a joke about that because _________________

____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________


33/45

24

hw Not D I

My qualicaions or riing his book res heavily on he monumenal

mess Ive made o his process mysel. I le ork ay oo early (age )

or noble reasons and ih lile planning. I have been a his or years

no. I am a viruoso a ha NO o do. I have gone don every blind

alley bu alcohol and drugs and have barked up more rong rees han a

near-sighed coon dog.

When I le corporae America, I as inen on pursuing my las ca-

reer. Ever since high school, Ive expeced o be a rier evenually. Bu

here ere a e deails i ould have been good o have aken he ime

o dene a he ouse. For sarers, my careers usually las seven years

maximum. I sared as a geologis ih sops as a say-a-home mom,

a college insrucor, a line manager in he uiliy business, a markeing

consulan, an ouplacemen specialis, several versions o conrac special-

is, and several levels as an execuive manager in he naural gas indusry

beore I go o rier. Te job I as leaving as as head o gas supply

or a major combinaion uiliy. I had aken me abou years o do all

ha. Wha made me hink riing as going o hold my aenion or

or or even years all by isel?

I am a rier. Ta as rue hen and is rue no. Bu I am also a

lo o hings ha don ge honored i I ocus only on riing. My rs

big misake as assuming I could, should, and ould be a one-channel

person. Never have been. Never gonna be. I need a lo o dieren hings

going on or lie o be good. You do no an o kno ho long i ook

me o admi ha.

I also did an abysmal job o making an accurae invenory o here

my suppor resided. My spouse as in avor o my leaving he corporae

ra race. He encouraged me o play he song. (Te song as ake Tis

Job and Shove I.) Bu many o he hings ha conrmed my value or me

inernally ere in he ork seing. Tere, I as perceived as compeen

and a resource o ohers. Tere, I go o solve complex problems as paro a eam o inelligen, un, enhusiasic peers. Tere, I kne ho o do


34/45


35/45

26

When I compleed my rs novel, I le i res as he gurus advised,

and hen revised i ih he help o a anasic criique group. I nally

began rying o sell i nearly HREE years aer Id le ork o become

a rier. By hen, e had sold he amily business, and my husband and

I had begun o ravel. Tis as hen cell phones ere sill opional,

exoic equipmen. My spouse as Welsh by heriage. He lived by he

adage A Welshman can live on ha a Sco hros aay. No ay ould

a cell phone have been par o our ravel gear even i I had suggesed

i. Which I didn.

Every ime e le on on a rip, Id orry one o he agens Id que-

ried migh call and an o alk o me hile I asn here. Aer a e

monhs, I sopped sending ou queries. I asn home enough o open he

mail much less edi my novel o mee a publishers requiremens.

Bu one o he grea hings abou being a rier is ha everyhing you

do is maerial. So no maer ha else I as doing, I as orking. Ta

idea made my abdicaion seem oally reasonable. ravel as good or

ha I as going o rie nex. I have been a anderer since I as old

enough o alk. I love o go see somehere else. Say he ord rip and

I ill immediaely pack a bag. And I did ge a lo o maerial. Bu no, in

addiion o no knoing whato rie, I didn kno when o rie. My

sense o compeence sank even loer.

We became masers o he ne ar o road ripping. Te rs year aer

e sold he business, e sa every one o our combined six kids in heir

on residences, hich mean rips o Seale, Dallas, Chicago, Kansas

Ciy, Los Angeles, and Denver. Denver as he only day rip. We ook

one ull monh o explore Florida in January. We en o my nieces ed-

ding in Wisconsin and hen on o see ennessee and he Grea Smokey

Mounains in he all. We ere raveling ools.

Ten came he Grea Advenure. Friends asked i e ould be in-

eresed in going on a orld cruise ih hem. Te ord cruise go o

he guy I as married o. He as ex-Navy. Te ord orld go o me.

ravel all over he orld? Oh yeah.


36/45

27

I kep deluding mysel ha he no-riing lie I as living as jus an

inerlude. Ta I as really orking. Ta I as no reired. I jus had a

job ha le me ravel all he ime and never ge anyhing done.

Aer he big cruise, ravel began o change one. Wih road rips, in-

sead o deciding ha e aned o see and he bes roue o ake o do

ha, e began deciding here e ere going based on imeshare avail-

abiliy. Id agree o organized ravel opporuniies because hey ere a

good deal or because riends aned o do hemno because i as an

advenure I really aned be on. rips became somehing e needed o do

o be able o alk abou hem hen e go home. rips became a ay o

ge aay rom he eaher raher han unpredicable advenures o ne

places (like WaKeeney, Kansas during an April snosorm). When e go

o he desinaion, he rs prioriy or my spouse as a beer and a dose o

CNBCso i el jus like being a home or him. Once i morphed ino

his ne orma, ravel as no longer un or me. Bu I am a anderer and

as no illing o admi ha i as leaving me ever more empy.

We ere reired. Yes, e ere. Was I reired? No ay as I going o

admi ha. I as a rier. And all ha ravel as grea or sories I as

going o rie someday.

So e kep on aking rips and doing imeshare eeks and I kep on

alling deeper and deeper ino a pi I didn even recognize as such. I

suspec he eec as sor o like having your eyesigh ail gradually. Fi-

nally, is jus oo dark o see. Did I see he dark? No. Bu I did eel he

dissonance. I blamed i on living a ee.

ime or he Geography Soluion! he region o he counry

here e lived as ha as making my lie so hard. Ta as ha kep

me rom smiling. Everyhing ould be ne i e lived somehere else. We

needed o move o he Pacic Norhes. Ta ould solve everyhing.

o be sure, here as a hole lo posiive abou he move, and I am

sill glad e did i. Bu i as no he soluion. I spen he nex hree years

eahering a ne nes and creaing ne garden magico very enjoyable

ays o no being a rier ihou having o admi I asn.


37/45

28

I as un o sar over in making a house a home. I as un even

hough e ere ou in he middle o nohere and i as a -minue rip

jus o buy a loa o bread. I as un because i as dieren and hus

challenging. Ho could i ake me so long o cach on? Challengeha

as ha I as really aer. Challenge ha helped me see mysel as ca-

pable. Everyhing I did o keep my lie changing as a ay o help me

eel competentas I deal ih he ne siuaions.

In rerospec, he level o complexiy I injeced ino even simple projecs

as my lieline. I may no have been riing, bu a leas I as thinking.

I as no, hoever, eeling. Or a leas admittingha I as eeling. Even

ih he colossal amoun o change I managed o generae, ha I as

eeling as suocaed, invisible, and dead.

Evenually, i all caugh up ih me. Tings go so black he saes op-

ion le as o go on ani-depressans. I haed he idea. Bu he black void

as so overhelming I kne i as eiher ha or risk doing somehing

supid and permanen.

I ook hose lovely lile pills or six eeksjus long enough o help

me nd my gravesie in he emoional cemeery and sar digging. I nally

admied o hings. Wha I hough as a good marriage as no. And

he person hom everyone else kne and relied on as me as no me

a all. Oddly, my ahers deaha man I adoredaer a long, rich lie,

nally goaded me ino acion on hese o couns. I moved ou o he

dream home and began o search or mysel.

Ten I chickened ou and moved back in. I decided screenriing,

no novels, as my niche. I ook a yearlong online graduae cericae

course rom UCLA and loved i. Wha a blas. I do love screenriing

(also riing novels) bu I as sill rying o do he one-channel hing.

I as also rying o do i in a siuaion ha as no a all healhy or

me emoionally.

Tree years ago, I really did le go o he marriage. I moved o a ne

ciy in he same area, closer o amily and riends and sociey in general.

I sared o join groups doing hings I as ineresed in. I began o make


38/45

29

riends o all sors. I kep up he personal excavaion eors, sill oally

conused abou ha i as I as supposed o be doing.

Te dan nally came hen I realized i asn jus one hing and i

ould never be jus one hing. I need variey and a high level o simulaion

in my lie. I need complexiy. I need un people ho like o do acive

hings. I need o hike. I need o be unny, even zany someimes. I need

o connec ih he Divine my on ay. I ook a major eor jus o ge

o he poin o using he ords I need comorably.

Am I done? No even close. Bu Im started. I ould have been a lo

easier i Id goen a good baseline on ho Ive gron o be beore I le

he career cocoon. Tireen years is a long ime andering around in

circles in he dark. I is my mos sincere ish ha his book helps you

avoid he experience.


39/45


40/45

253

Inex

a

acceping your eelings

adjusing o reiremen

adul children

age and menal imbalance

ageism compared o sexism

alloing he young o dene old

anger , , , ,

ani-depressans

aspecs o he physical environmen

aspecs o good inormaion

auomaic pilo aareness o personal needs

b

balance

Barbie

belie in God

blaming he job

blueprin or your reired liesyle

books as resources

c

Cameron, Julia , ,

chasing aer happiness

Choose Your On Advenure

Ciizens es

Code o Honor ,

communiy involvemen

compassion

compeence , compeencies

complexiy , , , , ,

conic, necessiy o

connecing

o he Universe conex o choices

creaiviydeniion

D

day dreams

decision-making , , raionally based ime spen

decision ree decline in inelligence because o age

difculy spending savings

disaser relie

dissaisacion ih radiional reiremen

doing nohing , , , , ,

Don Reire, Reire

Dr. Suess

Dyer, Wayne , , , e

eaing

eecive decision-making ,

emoional honesy

emoional suppor

emoionsbasics exploring eelings

energy , energy level

energy medicine ,


41/45

254

enough money , , ,

exciemen ,

experience drain

family siuaions

ear , , , ake ear

eeling empy

eeling old

ness and healh inormaion

exibiliy

un

gGaain, Shaki

geography soluions moving o a ne locaion emporary moves ravel

eaher driven ,

grandchildren

h

Harkness, Helen , , , , , healh,

physical

Hedonic readmill

hobbies

hogash ,

home preerences

honesy

ho o keep you mind as you age

Iideal pace

illness as an excuse

imporance o using ell-sourced inor-

maion

inormaion gahering ,

inormaion QC

iniial deal breakers

Insiue o Noeic Sciences ,

inangible asses , inuiion , , , ,

involvemen in social organizaions

J

judgmen

k

keep going , , , , ,

kinds o inelligence

kinds o hinking

l

lae blooming inelligence

La o Parsimony

learning ne hings

learning o no hink Lerner, Harrie

level o aciviy ,

liesyle elemens

link beeen aiude and emoion

living o .

looking good

looking young

losing key knoledge

love

as marshmallo emoion

M

malice

Map o Ideal Realiy

Map o Me

meaningneed or

meaningul lives

meaning o meaning

men and creaive ork

menopause and Alzheimers jokes

menal challenge ,

mind/body connecion

Myss, Caroline , , , ,

N

naural energy level

need or variey

negaive hinking nes eahers


42/45

255

neorkarophy a reiremen srech in

neorking ,

deniion exising or ne neork?

Nighingale, Earl

no knoing ,

no me momens

Nun-o-he-Monh Club

nuriion ,

o

Ofce Hours

older omen and marriage openness ,

opinions o ohers

P

pain

parens

passion , , , , ,

passion or ha e choose o do

periodicals as resources

Perls, Friz

pharmaceuical ads

physical aciviy exercise

physical aging

physical aracivenesslooking vibran

physical environmen

physical healhenergy

exercise physical sel aareness

pinch poins

play as menal gymnasics

primary relaionship , ,

prioriies

problem solving , ,

problem solving pracice

purpose

Q

qualiy o inormaion

quiling

rRed Cross

relaionships hormonal eecs on

relinquishing conrol

reiremenas graduaion isolaion in

reiremen choices

reiremen meccas

road ripping role o adul children

role o siblings

roundabous

rouine, desired amoun

Rumi

s

sacred conracs ,

saying no ,

saying yes

sense o compeence ,

shaping he ork

Sher, Barbara , ,

simpliciy

spiriual aspecs o lie

spiriual healhsense o purpose

spiriual pragmaism

spiriual saisacion saying in a bad marriage

sereoypes , ,

sress , , ,

supporing adul children ,

surrender ,

t

emporary geography

en s

erminal busyness


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256

esing boundaries

he nex hing , , ,

hinkingas menal moneky bars

encouraging each oher or an able oher riends ho hink myh o age and inabiliy o hink hings ha hink or us use i or lose i

hinking and inuiion

ime, deciding ho o use

imeshare , ,

oo Young o Reire ,

ouchy eely acors ransormaive dance ,

ravel bugs

rusing he oucome

rying on ne possibiliies

u

Use I Up game

v

values , verbal abuse ,

vicimology ,

vinage perormance bodies

voluneering

voluneer opporuniies

W

andering around in circles ,

ays o keep your mind in shape

ays o srucure ork

ebsiesinegriy o

ebsies as resources

When Anger Hurs

hen o judge

isdom ,

oo oo ,

ork aer reiremen

ork enjoymen

ork or pay in reiremen. riing

aareness o purpose challenges screenplays

y

yo yos


44/45


45/45

L ie ater retirement is much more exciting i you look beyondwhat you need or fnancial security as you prepare or it.Mary Lloyd lays out a whole new paradigm or doing this andshows you how to assess what you really want and needphysi-

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What Do You Want to Do Next?

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