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EGATIVE SELF-TALKSTOP THE TAPE!

There it goes againthat voice.

That often quiet, sometimes

screaming voice in your head that

judges your every move, accusingyou and those around you of all

sorts of imperfections and generally

bringing you down.

isnt a tangible sound, yet its destructive power should weigh in with mighty decibels. It als

s the power to lift your mood and brighten your day, if you allow it to. This voice has a

meits called self-tal. Try to imagine it as a tape that plays constantly in the bacgroundur thoughts. !hat does your tape play" Is your self-tal full of negative messages that cau

u to feel even a few of these emotions regularly"#

an$iety

guilt

insecurity%self-loathing

bitterness

frustration

despair

e list truly is endless, isnt it" &efore you read on, understand that you are designed to feel

de range of emotions, pleasant as well as very uncomfortable ones. Its simply part of being

man. &ut have you ever wondered whether you might be able to e$perience lessmisery an

aim morepeace in your life" 'erhaps you can. (ead on to learn more about negative self-ta

d what you can do about it.

hat feeds the tape?

you consider the nature of your self-tal, you might wonder where themes such as

ssimism or perfectionism first too root in you. That voice has been fed over the years by#

your parents or guardians

your other family members

authority figures in your life

your peers

the media and your culture

your circumstances, good or bad

your own responses to all of the above

her boo, Your Body Believes Every Word You Say, &arbara *evine e$plains that what you

l yourself about you, and your life, continues to shape you even now. Then, +ust to mae it

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en tougher to thin brighter thoughts, that self-tal tape is influenced by#

your mood

your health

sleep, nutrition, e$ercise, etc.

hat's playing right now?

e you ready to tae a close loo at your self-tal" ont try to change it, +ust listen to what

u say to yourself throughout the day. ometimes it taes a negative emotion to help us cat

e voice more easily. )re you feeling an$ious" ee if you are thining, !hat if this terrible

ing happens" or I now something catastrophic will happen to me. ind of hard to rela$

th those thoughts luring about, isnt it" r. avid &urns, author of Feeling Good: The New

ood Therapy, would say that you are fortune-tellinganticipating unpleasant or even

sastrous future events. To discover what self-tal messages lie underneath your worst

oments and lowest moods, spend a few minutes writing down your thoughts when you feel

serable.

hanging the tape

ow that you have some sense of your negative self-tal, what should you do about it" 0irst,

t this much into your beliefs about thoughtsthey happen. 1ood ones, boring ones, bi2arre

es, you name it. The last thing you need to addto what you tell yourself is I must have

mplete control of every thought and be perfect emotionally. !hy not rest in the nowledge

at, +ust because you thin it, doesnt mean its true" Thoughts are full of errors, untruths,

stortions and more. Thats another aspect of your human nature. 3ne simple change can be

cept that a low mood generates negative thining and that neither the mood nor the thinin

s to be taen so seriously. 4ou can also try these suggestions#

Talk to the negative voice5out loud or mentally6tell it to stop7

Tone down the messageIf you thin in e$treme terms such as always or never,

try changing the message to sometimes. 8eres an e$ample# change the thought, 9y

spouse is always late to 9y spouse is sometimes late.

Keep a journal4ou can write out a dialogue between your negative self-tal and

whatever you imagine that someone who loves you unconditionally would say about the

situation. 0or e$ample, 4ou sounded so ridiculous taling to that person, could be

countered with (ela$. That person might have been +ust as concerned about how he

sounded to you. &e sure to record all the good things that happen to you.

Feed the tape:$pose yourself to uplifting people, boos and environments as much possible, and try out a few positive messages now and then such as Its 3 to have

flaws, or I have so much to be thanful for.

Laugh at the negative voice if possi!le'icture your worries as a naughty child an

shoo them into a corner for time out. They cant come bac until theyre ready to

behave7

"ractice rela#ation;se deep breathing techni

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