Stolen Spies

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    THE THINGS MAN RARELY SAYS.

    Chiwama my grandson, you are only three years now, and I know when you are old

    enough to read this, I will not be around to explain or answer some of the questions

    which may creep in your mind to try and fathom the logic behind some of the things I am

    putting down.

    I am calling this The Things Man Rarely Says because to a large extent man would

    rather live and die with some of these experiences without revealing them to others. This

    may be to hide personal disappointments and frustrations in life, and sometimes the pain

    and fear of exposing oneself to ridicule, or just to conceal ones weakness. The many

    things man will tell others about himself are often the great deeds or feats of

    achievement, big successes, and mostly the good side of ones life. The picture often

    painted must be one to admire, show off and display merit.

    On the 19th September 2004, I found myself in a situation I had never dreamt of before,

    throughout my 57 years of life on this earth. Your grandmother, the mother to your father

    Walter, said this to me; If it is polygamy you want to practice, you should share

    everything equally. You have been giving everything to Euphemia at the expense of me,

    and Beatrice. You have been giving Euphemia K600,000 every month while I have been

    getting only K200,000 per month. This is on the pretext that my children are old, and can

    therefore support me. You are now broke, and you have embarrassed me so much that I

    am now forced to ask for money from my children to buy toilet tissues. You cannot

    afford that. Next time you will sale this house and give all the money to Euphemia. At

    one time you took Euphemia to her village for a funeral using your vehicle spending a lot

    of money leaving nothing at home. All your pension money is finished on this woman.

    You sold the vehicle and gave all the money to her and now that the money is finishedshe will run away from you and we shall see what you will do from now on.

    My grandson, I consider this statement as a very serious matter in a persons life. One

    thing it reveals is the importance people attach to money as a measure of personal

    security above all other things. The other thing it reveals is that, while you, as a man, can

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    continue providing for the survival of the so called family and a wife who thinks that you

    are there to toil for her, heaven will be yours so long as there is no change. When money

    and the so called security, is threatened, then all hell breaks out and your importance or

    whatever you rendered in the scenario before, is all ignored and forgotten.

    Our elder brother, Morris, had transferred to teach at Kamativi Tin Mines at one of the

    schools run by Catholics. By then I was at a boarding school doing my form two. As

    usual she became my friend and we would spend sometime together when we found

    chance to meet. There was no serious courtship to lead to a lasting relationship. We spent

    our time generally talking about things discussed when two people fond of each other get

    together. My stay at Kamativi was however brief because I had just stopped school due to

    circumstances beyond my control. In 1965, I left.

    This now brings me to a point where I must tell you about how it all began, for you to

    appreciate the history, the underlying currents, and other details, which may enable you

    to understand and make a fair comment and or judgment. I am not writing this to

    influence your perception of me. Far from that, I am attempting to put on record things

    which may never have seen the light of day, if all it mattered, was to be seen as a good

    man.

    You might want to know who Grandpa was if you do not already know. Well, my full

    names are Edward Mwela as seen on the official documents. However, my baptismal

    certificate reads that I am Edward Chiwama, whose father was Michael Mwela, and my

    mother was Theresa Mubanga. I was born on the 29th December in 1946. I had six

    brothers and one sister, and their names in the order of birth were Remmy, Morris,

    Emma, Thomas, then myself, Simeo, Christopher, and Mathias.

    My parents were both Bemba by tribe and hailed from Bembaland around Kasama

    specifically from Chipelepele village in Chief Chitimukulus district in the Northern part

    of Zambia.

    Your Grandmother, the mother to your father, was called Verreh Julius Phiri, and her

    parents came from Eastern province in Zambia. Her mother was Nsenga, by tribe from

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    Petauke, and her father was a Kunda from Malambo in the same province. In addition,

    your grandmother had two brothers, a Mr. York Banda, and the younger of the two,

    called Aidan Phiri.

    Where it all started. I met your grandmother at Kamativi Tin Mines in the then Southern

    Rhodesia, now called Zimbabwe in 1963. She was a pupil at one school in the same class

    as Simeo my young brother. In 1965 I left Kamativi Tin Mines for Zambia in search of

    employment. We did not correspond with each other thereafter, until several years had

    passed.

    In 1968, while I was at the Ndola Trade Fair, I met a Mr. Matheo Phiri, a son to a Mr.

    Besamu Phiri. We had lived with this family in Kamativi and we prayed at the same

    church. Matheo had known my relationship with Verreh way back in Kamativi, and to

    some extent he claimed the two were related. He asked me if I knew where my girl friend

    was. I told him I did not know and I expressed keenness to know. He then revealed that

    she was doing nursing at St. Francis Hospital in Katete. He then gave me the address to

    St. Francis Hospital and strongly urged me to write her, because in his view, she would

    welcome a letter from me. Matheo was then teaching at a school somewhere in Chingola.

    We then parted company and never had chance to meet until well long after that meeting

    at the Trade Fair that I learnt about the sad demise of Matheo. However, what followed

    thereafter was that I followed the lead and opened contact with Verreh, and the sequel of

    events thereafter, is the result of my present narration of issues leading to this time I have

    sat down to write down these experiences.

    My grandson, due to limitations of space, I want to focus on experiences that are

    concerned with the family in particular on issues to do with my relations with your

    grandmother, my perception of the family, some briefs on each of my children who are

    your aunties and uncles, your father, and something about yourself. I will try to conclude

    by giving a general view of what I see and think about the family you are born in, in

    order to give you a clue to some of the things you may experience in your own life.

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    It is important that you have some knowledge about the background of your father and

    this simply means you must know your father, his brothers and sisters. Your father is

    apparently my fifth child with your grandmother. This means that before he was born, we

    had four other children some of whom you already know.

    When I and your grandmother established contact while she was at St. Francis Hospital

    as a trainee nurse, we arranged to meet so that we could spend some holiday together.

    This opportunity occurred for us in 1969 just at the end of your grandmothers training.

    She traveled to Lusaka from Katete and we arranged to meet at the Lusaka Railway

    station. At that time I was working for the Zambia Railways as a Fireman and based in

    Ndola. That holiday reaffirmed our old relationship and made us think of making our

    relationship a life long one. The problem, which arose, in terms of getting the formalities

    of marriage done, was that her parents at that time, were still in Zimbabwe and it was not

    possible to send emissaries to Zimbabwe. The people she lived with in Zambia were not

    very keen to take full responsibility of the task. But, something else happened. The

    holiday we spent together in Ndola, resulted into a pregnancy, such that when we were

    supposed to be making overtures for marriage, we were now faced with a pregnancy and

    an expectation.

    In the Zambian tradition, this development was now a case for which I was asked to

    account. Given the state of relationship, that is, we already knew each other, we were

    both adults and in employment, we settled for marriage in order to raise a family, which

    this expectation now offered us.

    We got married.

    Aunt Vivien.

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    Your aunt, Vivien, was borne on 6th October 1970 at the University Teaching Hospital.

    At that time, your grandma was living with her brother in Chawama compound in Lusaka

    and I was staying in Ndola where I worked for the Railways. What that meant was that

    your grandma had to move to Ndola to come and join me.

    We both wanted to do something for her. Vivien was our first child together and as such

    she was somewhat special to both of us. She was named after my own mother, Mubanga.

    She received close attention and warm affection. Your grandmother made her a very

    special pre-occupation because she delayed her commencement of her nursing

    profession, in order to see her grow. I remember traveling from Ndola, with a bag full of

    an assortment of baby clothes, which I had bought after some very extensive consultation

    with a number of friends relating to the colours a baby girl, wore, against a baby boy.There were a number of pink outfits ranging from socks to woolen gloves. I remember

    taking leave of absence from work to enable me travel to Lusaka to see my child.

    The excitement of a new baby opened doors to other experiences, some good, some bad,

    and some very weird. Among the good experiences, were the feelings that one was now a

    father, and, in the new child, one saw himself in miniature form as this relates to features

    seen in a child. One looked so close in the eyes of the baby to discover innate similarities

    such as the shape of the nose, the lips, the eyebrows, the cheeks, including the colour of

    the skin. Among the bad experiences, one discovered that some freedoms had to be lost

    and one checked the manner he behaved. Things like, free sitting, smoking, noise levels,

    and times one turned up at home, became controlled, and got checked. However, the one

    awkward experience I went through at that time was that my mother-in-law wanted to

    take away my daughter when she was barely six months old.

    At that time, my in-laws where in Zimbabwe, and it meant that they had to take the child

    with them to Kamative Tin Mines leaving me and your grandmother in Ndola, Zambia,

    where we lived at the time. I found the request rather strange, and initially, I refused. This

    refusal was however not for a long time, because when Vivien turned twelve months old,

    her grandmother took her away, and left for Kamative Tin Mines. This incident became a

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    thorny issue at a later time, because it became very contentious as it looked as if I and my

    in-laws differed greatly as who was to keep the child between I, the parent, and them, the

    grand parents, to the child. We never at anyone time, agreed over this one subject,

    because I remained convinced that the child was to be raised by the parent, in this

    particular case, myself.

    The insistence and determination of my in-laws to keep my child at the exclusion of the

    parents was very weird to me, and for a long time we never saw eye to eye with each

    other.

    To a large extent, I was sufficiently vindicated later when Viviens schooling got

    affected. It so happened that at the time she was doing her grade 7, her grand father was

    retired from employment by the mines, and he had to travel back to Zambia to settle at

    the village. She failed to write her examinations in Zimbabwe, and the authorities in that

    country refused her entry because she had no guardian. Attempts to let her stay with some

    of their relatives failed to succeed, and the poor girl was shunted back to Zambia. What

    followed was that Vivien joined a grade 8 class, in the third term, at a private school, to

    continue her studies. Otherwise she was going to repeat her grade 7, and get delayed in

    her school progress.

    Your auntie Vivien, proceeded to complete her grade twelve and went to college to do

    accountancy. She came out of college with, first a certificate in accounts and business

    studies and later read a diploma in accountancy then called Zambia Diploma in

    Accountancy.

    Over the years she has been pursuing further studies in Accountancy at the professional

    level.

    Uncle Eddie.

    Your uncle, Eddie, the medical doctor in Germany, is our second child and the first son in

    the family. His full names on the birth record are Edward Julius Mwela.

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    Eddie was born on the 18th March, 1972, at 1.00 hours, in the Ndola Central Hospital.

    You will notice that during that time your aunt, Vivien, had already been taken by her

    grandmother to Zimbabwe, and we were just the two of us at home, i.e., I, and your

    grandmother. We both worked. Your grandmother was a nurse at the Arther Davison

    Childrens Hospital, and I was a Locomotive Fireman with Zambia Railways, based in

    Ndola.

    The arrival of your uncle in the family was much more a stabilizing event considering

    what had taken place concerning your aunt. My in-laws were not as excited about the

    baby boy, as they were with the baby girl. This one was our child and in particular my

    child.

    In her nursing job, your grandmother, at times worked night shift, and the day shifts were

    not any better, because they were most times, irregular. Similarly, as a Fireman with the

    Railways, my work schedules were even more tempting and trying than those of nurses

    or hospital workers. Our shifts were very exerting on time and little allowed spare time

    especially to manage a family, in particular a young family. There were times I was on

    duty for more than twelve hours on end. And because of these unusual working times, we

    often depended on maids to assist in the care of the children. First we brought in cousins

    to your grandmother to help, but when these became more and more unreliable, we hired

    directly from the open market.

    I still vividly remember those times I sat dozing, and tired with your uncle on my lap,

    while his milk warmed on the stove, only to be awakened by smoke covering the whole

    house and discover that the feeding bottle, the milk, and the water in the pot, had burnt

    out while we both slumbered off. I dont know how many feeding bottles got burnt over

    time. Eddie was very particular about his feeding. He always woke up at around 1.00 in

    the morning and only slept when he had taken his warm milk. I also remember the first

    six weeks after his birth, when he was attacked by pneumonia and landed him in the

    Arther Davison hospital. This affliction was so severe that Doctor Anand the Hospital

    Superintendent took a special interest in the case and personally supervised the treatment.

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    At one point during this illness, I was called from work at short notice to rush to the when

    he had completed writing his last examination paper. By then we were in Lusaka and I

    was working for ZECCO as Personnel Manager.

    When we got to Ndola, we found the situation was serious and frightening. He had

    developed a hiccup and many who saw him gave him little hope for the following day.

    However, deep down my heart I knew he would pull through and he did pull through.

    hospital because the case was worsening. This incident almost cost me my job because it

    was said I did not get permission to leave the Locomotive engine unattended.

    That said so far, Eddie survived the pneumonia and was discharged from hospital after

    two months. He rapidly picked up weight and got very active to the point of being

    naughty. In any case his growth rate was phenomenal and this went on until he was old

    enough to go to school. He began school in Kabwe at the age of three years, first at

    Kabwe Kindergarten, and later at Lukanga Primary School through Mukobeko Secondary

    and ending at Chiwala Secondary School in Ndola, where he completed grade 12 with a

    division one. The other illness scare occurred when he Eddie was writing his Grade 12

    examinations at Chiwala. This time he had an attack of malaria. This attack was so severe

    that all hope was almost lost. He was rushed and admitted to Ndola Central Hospital just

    When he gained some little strength, the young Doctor who attended him advised us to

    take him away upon discharge and we drove back to Lusaka with him. From the looks of

    things this young Doctor was also skeptical about his condition and by some hand of fate

    advised him to pursue medicine as he left the hospital.

    One experience that I went through during Eddies sickness I cannot forget is the

    treatment we were subjected to at the hands of Ruth the wife to my cousin William

    Bweupe. This inconsiderate woman treated us like lepers each time we arrived at her

    house each moment we came from the hospital. She believed Eddie was suffering from

    some infectious disease (typhoid), that would be passed on to her and her children in her

    home from the utensils we brought to her house, and in her frenzy to remain well, she

    avoided contact with us as if it was us who were sick. All the same we left their house

    without infecting any of them.

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    Eddie had intended to enter Copperbelt University to pursue Quantity Surveying and he

    actually was admitted but at the same time he won a scholarship to do medicine in

    Germany, and in 1990, he left Zambia for Berlin in Germany were he is to date. He is

    married to Elke whom you have seen and played with at the few times they have visited

    Zambia.

    Aunt Milika.

    Our third born is your aunt Milika. She was born in Kabwe at the Kabwe General

    Hospital on 23rd June 1974. Her full names are Milika Lukonde Mwela.

    Millie was a very interesting baby. While her elder sister, Vivien, sucked her thumb, she

    sucked two fingers, the index and the middle fingers. Eddie, the elder brother, was on the

    breast for thirteen months and had to be persuaded to stop, but in her case she only

    suckled for six months and stopped on her own. The name Milika is said to have

    belonged to her great-aunt, the sister to my father in-law. I had actually asked my in-laws

    to give her a name, hoping that they were going to pick a typical traditional name from

    either the male or female line. When they settled for the name Milika, I was rather

    disappointed. I checked the dictionary of names and discovered that the name was in fact

    foreign and I decided to name her after my paternal grandmother Lukonde, the mother to

    my father.

    In terms of heath, Millie was not a problem child. She had a good appetite for the usual

    baby foods and she enjoyed the milk from her feeding bottle. The only irritant she

    suffered was some form of rush, which covered her body, and as it itched, you could see

    that she was troubled, as she scratched the skin with her little fingers. We tried various

    medicaments and applications but the condition petered off as she grew up.

    Just before Milika turned three years of age, your grandmother entered midwifery school

    for one year. This meant that we remained three at home that is uncle Eddie, aunt Milika

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    and myself. So for twelve months we managed as best as we could, mind you at that time

    aunt Vivien was in Zimbabwe with her grand parents. At one point, due to work pressure,

    I moved the two to Lusaka to leave with my brother where I would pay them a visit from

    time to time. This experience created a problem later as it took some time for the two to

    accept Vivien as one of them when she came back home from Zimbabwe. The two

    usually banded together and mocked or laughed at their sister. Milika had some

    interesting characteristics. When she insisted on having something, she usually had her

    way. At one time she admired a dress worn by her friend in the neighborhood, and when I

    arrived from work, I was immediately confronted by her, with the friend in taw, and told

    me that she wanted a dress similar to the one the friend was wearing. When I mentioned

    that I had no money, I was told to go and make lifts with the vehicle and make the money

    for the dress. Time and again we changed maids because Millie was not satisfied with

    one maid after another. At one point she was being taken to school by our elderly house-

    servant, Mr. Always. Each time they got near to the school, she would tell the man to

    walk a distance behind her so that onlookers did not associate her with him, in case they

    took him for her father. There was this instance when she was peering through the

    window and saw a lame person walking on the road followed by two sons. She called

    loudly out for me, and when I got to the window, she pointed at the people on the road

    and asked me, Does it mean that those children will be like their father when they grow

    up? I was puzzled, but I said the father is lame and the children where not lame and they

    would not walk like their father when they grew up.

    Milika went to school at Neem Tree Primary School, and after grade seven, she went to

    boarding school at Fatima Girls Secondary School in Ndola and from there she entered

    the University of Zambia in the School of Education. She came out of University with a

    Bachelor of Education and proceeded to complete a Masters Degree in Communication

    for Development. As a teacher by training, Milika briefly taught at St. Marys Secondary

    School and at Roma Girls Secondary School in Lusaka before she left Zambia for

    Botswana on a three-year teaching contract.

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    Uncle Ivor.

    Your uncle Ivor Mulenga Mwela is our fourth child. He was born on 8 th February 1978 in

    the Kabwe General Hospital. Ivor was never a problem child as he grew without any

    serious illness. The only memorable incident that comes to my mind is the time he got

    burnt by Eddie on the foot with a pressing iron. What really happened I dont know, but I

    understand someone was pressing some clothes at home and Eddie as naughty as he was,

    while playing with his kid brother, took the pressing iron, hot as it was, and placed it on

    the foot of his little brother and burnt him.

    From very early, Ivor liked to scribble what he thought were images of who ever came

    around home, and he would show the visitor the picture he had drawn of him and give

    him to carry as he went away. My close friend Tembo was a regular visitor at home and

    each time he visited us, Ivor drew an image of Mr. Tembo and showed him, telling him,

    look, I have drawn you! Tembo would laugh and laugh in amusement.

    Uncle Ivor, as you call him, was very smart as a little boy. He liked to dress up as a

    gentleman in a suit with a tie, like daddy. Like his brother and sisters, he attended the

    Kabwe Kindergarten before he went to Neem Tree Primary School. When we moved to

    Lusaka, Ivor attended Jacaranda Primary School briefly before we found ourselves back

    in Kabwe again. However, to cut a long story short, Ivor went for secondary education

    after grade seven first to Mahatma Gandhi Secondary School in Ndola Rural, then to

    Kafue Secondary and finally to Petauke Secondary School where he was expelled by

    Father Gundamwala who was his Headmaster, and he was forced to write his Grade

    Twelve Examinations by protest.

    After his Grade Twelve results it was difficult for him to enter University because he did

    not have the University entry requirements, so he enrolled at the Evelyn Hone College,

    for a course in Computer Graphics. This was chosen on the basis that from childhood,

    Ivor had been interested in drawings and similar artistic activities. It looks like he is very

    comfortable with graphics, and he has made himself a career out of it.

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    Your Father - Walter.

    Your father, Walter, is our fifth child coming after uncle Ivor. Walter was born on 9th

    November 1980, in the Kabwe General Hospital. His full names on the birth record are

    Walter Sikubili Mwela. The name Sikubili comes from his maternal grandfather, Mr.

    Julius Sikubili Phiri who was the father to your grandmother.

    We had expected him to arrive in December according to the hospital records on the

    expected date of delivery called EDD. As such, he was born pre-mature, and his birth

    weight was on the low side. I remember those days he was put in the sun to enable him

    get some vitamin D direct from the sun. These sun-baths were so intense at times that the

    child could turn red, and how much he cried your grandmother assisted by Mrs, Siva

    (now late, may her soul rest in peace) could never let go. Your father was so small at

    birth but through the process of constant care by the two nurses, he grow out of his

    smallness into a big and robust child. After a period of three months, he quickly gained

    weight and this created another problem concerning the heart. I remember around that

    time, whilst away for studies in London were my employers then, Zambia Railways

    Limited sent me, I received reports that the child was very ill because he had problems

    with breathing due to a small heart for his big body. However, he soon grew out of the

    seemingly frightful heath concerns and became a bouncy little chap and began to enjoy

    his childhood. At the age of three years, like his brothers and sisters before him, he was

    sent to Nursery school.

    Walter attended several schools starting from Kabwe, through Ndola culminating in

    Lusaka and Ellensmere in Kabwe rural at Mukonchi Farm Block. You may ask why your

    father went through schools in all these places. It is important that you are made aware

    that about the same time that your father was going through his early school days, it so

    happened that I was also on the move.

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    I had just returned from the twelve weeks course in the United Kingdom, and conditions

    of work at Zambia Railways had not shown any improvement, and a number of

    companies were looking for qualified and experienced personnel. One of these companies

    was Central Cigarette Manufacturers-Rothmans, which I joined, as Manpower

    Development Manager in 1982. However, this did not last long, as I soon found myself

    heading back to the Railways in Kabwe. So in search of greener pastures, I found myself

    moving from company to company and along the family moved as well.

    As I have indicated, your father was born in Kabwe General Hospital in 1980. In 1982,

    we moved to Lusaka where we briefly stayed, before heading back to Kabwe. In 1984, I

    left the family in Kabwe for Lusaka to pursue farther studies at the University of Zambia

    until 1986 when I graduated with a Bachelor of Arts Degree in Public Administration

    major with a minor in Sociology with Credit.

    You might ask what significant tidbits come to mind with which your father is associated

    with at that early age. I vividly recall that Walter was generally quiet and at times one

    would mistake him for being shy, which was far from the true picture. At the

    Kindergarten run by a Mrs. Campbell-Gordon, he was put in a drama group where they

    staged the Christmas play and he played the role of one of the Angels, I cant exactly

    recall now which one, but it must have been one announcing the birth of Jesus. One

    noticeable thing, which progressively appeared as he grew, was the number of people

    who gathered around him. At every place we moved when you saw little boys calling

    around looking for a friend, it was certain they were looking for Walter and no one else.

    At one time, an incident happened where a vehicle was allegedly stolen and it was

    suspected that the thieves used some little boys to push the vehicle from the premises to

    drive it away. It was alleged that one of the boys identified with the group, was one of

    those who played with Walter. This incident occurred when we lived at Number 4 John

    Akapelwa Drive in Woodlands. This and such little incidents of excessive play especially

    with some boys from Chilenje compound had a telling effect on the school performance,

    as the results per term, were getting poorer and poorer. He was then at Woodlands A,

    and for sure had he continued to sit the grade seven examination, the result was going to

    be disastrous. At that time, the logical thing to do was to send him to boarding school,

    and consequently, he and his little brother, Bupe, were found boarding places at Ibex Hill

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    School. Walter was one person you could ask what do you want to be in future and he

    would just smile and never give you any answer. To him, the future was too remote to

    fathom. However, at the end of it all, Walter, completed his Grade Twelve at Ellensmere

    with a very good grade and was offered a place at a University in Namibia to pursue a

    degree in Business Administration and Economics. Unfortunately, just around about this

    time, I retired from active employment and to fund that University program became

    difficult, and thought of other alternative programs for him to follow. Initially, we had

    agreed that your Auntie-Milika, who was then teaching in Botswana, was going to assist

    in financing this program, but behind the scenes, other forces were at play and she

    changed her mind and opted to build her house, suggesting that I, who had just retired

    must have had a lot of money from my pension, to pay for your fathers program of

    study. In the alternative, I suggested to your father to take up teaching as a career, but

    again, this was discouraged, and instead, he was influenced to attempt a computer course

    at Evelyn Hone College, which he never successfully completed, despite of having spent

    two solid years of study. Eventually, after almost another two years of soul-searching and

    idleness, briefly working in the Standard Chartered Bank on temporary basis, Walter

    decided to go for teaching, and he is pursuing a Diploma at Copperbelt Secondary

    Teachers College in Kitwe.

    Uncle Bupe.

    Your uncle, Bupe, the one you fondly call uncle Simon is the sixth born child of the

    family in you fathers line of siblings. He is the last-born child of your paternal

    grandmother, the mother to your father, Walter, and he is the one who comes

    immediately after your father or so to speak, the young brother to your father.

    Bupe was born on the 10th of February 1985, in the Kabwe General Hospital.

    Bupe was born at a very trying and difficult time in my life. It was the time I was at the

    University of Zambia in my final year towards the end of my Bachelor of Arts degree

    programme.

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    My employers then Zambia Railways Limited, had just granted me unpaid leave of study,

    and want that meant was that I had no money for upkeep and there was no money at

    home as bread winner. So I went to school on a Government bursary like a school leaver.

    As a child, Bupe had no complications like some of his brothers. He was a healthy little

    guy, and grew up normally like all healthy children. He tended to be on the quieter side

    of things, never excited about anything and went on his child routines without fuss. He

    was privileged in many ways than one. He enjoyed the attention of his brothers and

    sisters and never seemed to lack friends or people around him. He was the baby of the

    house and everyone was fond of him.

    When he turned two and half years, Bupe was enrolled like his other siblings, at the

    Kabwe Kindergarten and was briefly there until we moved to Ndola in the course of 1988

    in August of that year. At Ndola, he and his brother Walter were enrolled at some school

    within Northrise but not very far from Luneta Road were we lived. He later continued

    with school in Lusaka when we moved to Lusaka in 1989, specifically starting from 1990

    at Jacaranda Primary School then he moved to Olympia Park Primary School, and then

    later moved to Woodlands A and briefly Kabulonga Boys, Ibex Hill School and finally

    to Ellensmare in Kabwe at Mukonchi Farm Block.

    After his Grade Twelve School leaving examinations he attempted A levels at David

    Kaunda, with a view of proceeding abroad for more advanced studies in Europe. This

    however could not take-off due to some logistical problems and alternatively he joined

    the Dental School at Thorn Park to pursue a three year diploma in Dental Technology,

    which he successfully completed in June 2008.

    Bupe is at the moment attached to the University Teaching Hospital as a Dental

    Technologist.

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    CHAPTER TWO

    In this chapter, I want to explain the circumstances, and the way I met the other person

    referred to as Beatrice, her children and the position as it prevailed at the material time I

    set to write this revelation to you. You will have to forgive me for some of the things I

    am telling you, because as I earlier said, some of these things would ordinarily not have

    seen the light of day.

    In 1974, I had to move to Kabwe to take up my new appointment as a Job Analyst

    changing from Locomotive Driver, but within the same company, Zambia Railways. The

    circumstances which necessitated this movement may be of no consequence today, but

    what was cardinal then was that I had to change first from shift work to a regular work

    programme, and secondly, was the fact that my study programme had advanced

    substantially and I needed and felt that a professional change was ripe. This movement

    meant that I had to transfer from Ndola to Kabwe, and also change the department from

    Traffic to then Personnel. So around July of that year, I moved to Kabwe.

    I had a house in Ndola as a Locomotive Driver, and when I moved to Kabwe there was

    no readily available accommodation for me, and this meant that I had to make personal

    arrangements for sometime while the company was preparing to get me a reasonable

    house befitting my new status as Job Analyst. I moved in to stay or live with my cousin,

    one called Elias Chonta, who was then a bachelor and lived in a bloke of houses called,

    single quarters in an area called Buyantanshi or Poleni. I lived with the Chontas for a

    good three months before I was given a two-bedroomed house in the same township.

    It was during this period that I saw and took a liking for this woman called Beatrice.

    Every morning as I walked to work, it was often that we would walk together as we

    headed in the same direction. I was at that time operating from the haedquarters of the

    Railways, popularly known as Top office. The routine was such that we would walk into

    town and then head towards the Top office direction, and it so happened that at the end of

    day, we found ourselves on the same route towards home, which was in the same

    township, and the houses, though not close by, were in the same locality or

    neighbourhood.

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    We somehow got on to talking to each other, and some form of relationship developed.

    First, it was very casual and distant, and this crystallized later into some fondness for

    each other. However when I later made advances of a deeper appreciation of the person,

    she rebuffed me that she never went out with married men, and that she hated Bembas. I

    did not take the rebuff lying down, but I was rather challenged, and I was spurred to

    prove her wrong, but a few months later I noticed that Beatrice was pregnant. When I

    asked who was responsible for her pregnancy, she told me off that at least I was not the

    one responsible for the pregnancy but someone else. I felt much put off and challenged

    and immediately told her that though that particular pregnancy was not mine, the next

    one would certainly be mine. She laughed this off as the biggest joke. Inside me I knew

    this was no joke at all, but something I had to work at and accomplish, as announced.

    Beatrice had her baby, and I watched her from a distance. The contact with her was rather

    lukewarm and I congratulated her for her baby boy, while I waited my turn to come.

    What I wanted to establish was if she was married or not, and when it turned out that she

    was not married, I got more encouraged and so an opportunity availed itself to avenge the

    insult or just prove her wrong that I was just as good for her like anybody else, whether

    married or not.

    When her baby was just over twelve months old, this was her son OBrien, born on 9 th

    September, 1975, it occurred that the person responsible for her pregnancy seemed to

    have decided to abandon her and the baby all together. My overtures to win her, though

    cursorily brushed off, did not amount to an outright rejection. She began to warm up

    towards me. This persuasion took me a good one year to convince her that I meant

    business, and that I was out to get her. It did not take long from there that she accepted

    and she claims that the reason for her accepting my proposals was to stop me from

    pestering her any further and not really that she had any liking for me. Soon after that we

    dated quite often. She would call me at work very frequently during the course of the day,

    and at the end of day she made sure she waited for me, as we got back home from work.

    This relationship grow stronger and stronger by the day, until in 1977 she announced that

    she was in the family way again, and this time I was the one responsible for the

    pregnancy.

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    Orlando, her second son, I am made to believe, was born on 23 rd May,1978, in Lusaka.

    We met throughout the period of the pregnancy because then she was working for

    Tobacco Board of Zambia in their Kabwe office as a secretary. When the expected date

    of delivery of the child was drawing closer, she quietly left Kabwe, and never told me

    were she went, only to learn at later date that she had delivered a baby boy and that she

    was on maternity leave.

    You will note that at that moment in time I was married and the family had since moved

    to Kabwe upon being allocated a house within Buyantanshi Compound, so the reason for

    her behavior may have been fear of your grand mother who was at that moment in time

    was also nursing your uncle Ivor who was born in the same year but in February.

    Beatrice tried by all means to conceal the presence of the child from me. She had

    categorically told me that she did not want anything from me and she was going to keep

    the child by herself. I was not allowed to visit the child or even buy him things like soap

    washing powder or any clothes or baby ointment. She completely cut me out and isolated

    me from the babys existence.

    As time passed by, rumour went round the township to the effect that the child Beatrice

    was carrying closely or very much resembled, your uncle Ivor, and that I was the father to

    Beatrices child. This bit of information came to the attention and knowledge of your

    grand mother, who was in the least not amused. I later learnt that she used to boast to

    other women at the clinic that no other woman would ever date her husband, and when

    this development was revealed, she went into frenzy and tantrum, and hell broke out at

    home. Every evening, for over six months, I was asked if the child Beatrice carried was

    mine or not, and when was I to bring the bitch to the house so that she could leave room

    for her and her child. This nagging went on for more than six months and it took place at

    any time of the night. Sometime I could be awakened at 2.00hours in the morning to be

    questioned, and if I just kept quiet, she would go on talking endlessly for the better part

    of the night, telling me that I had wasted her time she would have been better married to

    someone who loved her and cared for her. However throughout this diatribe, I would only

    respond by telling her that, if Beatrices child was indeed mine, I was either going to be

    summoned to court, or the family to the woman was going to call me to their home to

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    answer certain questions relating to the maintenance of the child, or they were going to

    bring the child and the mother to me to keep.

    Your grandmother could not listen, nor could she be persuaded to listen. She went on and

    continued her nagging and unreasonable, and I kept telling her that if the child is mine, he

    was going to come or be brought. When I saw that the situation was not changing, I

    briefed her brother, now late, Mr. York Banda to ask her grandmother who was then

    leaving in Chawama compound, here in Lusaka to come to Kabwe and see if she could

    counsel her. The two of them came to Kabwe and tried to persuade her to see sense, but

    your grandmother could not listen and continued to nag me night and day over the matter.

    The next entourage over the issue was that of Mr. Abeuty Banda, a brother of hers or

    cousin so to speak. Mr. Banda told her that there was nothing peculiar about a husband

    producing a child outside wedlock; as long as he kept his word that the new relationship

    would not disrupt the marriage and that if he continued to support his family as ever,

    there was no problem. He even revealed that he himself had other children by two other

    women at the village. This also failed to assuage your grandmother.

    The matter was later placed in the hands of Mrs. R.R. Banda, when she visited us in

    Kabwe, In fact she had come to Lusaka, and upon learning that there was no peace in

    Kabwe, she was asked to extend her visit to Kabwe to see if she could assist in helping

    the situation. Her wise counsel did not vary from the rest counsel we had received. All

    she said was that as long as the issue was not raised by the other family there was no need

    to worry, and encouraged us to take care of the family and each other, because wherever

    there are people mistakes are bound to be there and people should learn to forgive.

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