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SHINE: RESCRIPTING YOUR LIFE IN PARTNRSHIP WITH THE UNIVERSE
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Also by Yene Assegid
FORGET NOT THE SPARROWS
An African Story: Unfinished Conversations with My Grandmother
BUTTERFLIES OVER AFRICA
Perspectives on changing and transforming the continent
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SHINE
RESCRIPTING YOUR LIFE IN PARTNERSHIP
WITH THE UNIVERSE
YENE ASSEGID
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Copyright © 2015 by Yene Assegid PhD
Published by Tuesday Mornings Rue Andre Van Hasselt 40 1030 Brussels Belgium
Editorial: Tuesday Mornings
Cover illustration: Gamatong
Cover design: Gamatong
Layout: Johyver Ampang
Author Photo: MQ, Beijing, China
All rights reserved. This book my not be reproduced in whole or in part
without written permission from the publisher, except by a reviewer who
may quote brief passages in a review; nor may any part of this book be
reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by
any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or other,
without written permission from the publisher.
ISBN: 978-0-9885792-3-1
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“There is surely nothing other than the single purpose of the present
moment. A man's whole life is a succession of moment after moment.
There will be nothing else to do, and nothing else to pursue. Live being true
to the single purpose of the moment.”
― Tsunetomo Yamamoto, Hagakure: The Book of the Samurai
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PRAISE FOR
Shine: Rescripting Your Life In Partnership With The Universe
“The title of Yene Assegid’s latest book, Shine, could not be more apt. From
the beginning, when she finds herself in an ambulance after a ‘soul shut
down’, through her profound analysis of how an ailing spirit can be lovingly
cared for and restored to health and happiness, Assegid’s powerful
optimism and insights shine through. For anyone overwhelmed by the
pressures and pain of the world today, this inspirational book is the perfect
medicine.”
― Joan Baxter, author of Dust in Our Eyes: An Unblinkered look at Africa.
“If there is one book you must read on how to creatively draw on your
inner assets to successfully realise your full humanity, it should be Shine:
Rescripting Your Life in Partnership With The Universe. It is a must read for
everyone who is either on a quest for self-fulfillment, or in need of sound
anchorage in the midst of or following life-shaking experiences, or on a new
journey of humanitarianism in its fullest sense. Assegid offers an amazing
menu of insightful and inspiring ideas, brilliant nuggets of wisdom, and a
rich array of illuminating lessons. She draws on imagination, real-life stories,
and multi-disciplinarity to show how we can let our ego go, our fears
tumble, our dreams of beauty become reality, and our constructed walls of
separation and isolation from others bridged. She draws deep into our
often-darkened crevices of humanity with enlightening questions and
creative answers. Many books tell us how to solve specific existential
problems but not how to navigate the many paths to the fullest range of
them; this book does both.”
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― Akwasi Aidoo, PhD, Senior Fellow at Humanity United, and Founding CEO of TrustAfrica.
“Yene Assegid has written a sincere, personal, spiritual and encouraging
little book. After you read it through, then re-start anywhere and read it in
pieces. Open it anywhere and read a passage or two to gain your daily
inspiration. I was moved by her sincerity. It helped me to see her soul.”
― Frank T. Gallo, Ph.D., author of The Enlightened Leader
“The book touches on the things that really matter in life in a way that
inspires deep reflection and motivates one to an attitudinal change. In this
book, I found myself and was able to put many things, events and people in
perspective. It’s a must read for everyone.”
― Bond Emeruwa, President of the Nigerian Film Guild
“In Shine, Yene manages to take the reader through a journey of self-
discovery. The book provides easy to follow lessons on finding your true
gift, which forms the basis of why we are here. An essential read for anyone
looking for a greater meaning to life’s purpose.”
― Kelo Kubu, TEDxJohannesburg
“Dr Yene Assegid is a new breed of Super Star. Like a bright comet she
travels across the globe bringing new awareness and awe to where there was
previously darkness. It’s such a pleasure to be in her presence. Yene has a
way of reminding us all, that we were children, and we can access that joy,
happiness and curiosity again.”
― Adrian Cahill, Executive Coach
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FOREWORD
Yene Assegid’s has the gift to inspire and to make others wise and this is what
her latest book, Shine: Rescripting Your Life in Partnership with the Universe does.
It is a wonderful book from a prudent and sensitive heart birthed in her ‘soul
shut down’.
Shine draws our disparate lives to focus on what really matters in life. The
book poses the fundamental question of what really matters in life? A
question a clever lawyer once posed to Jesus Christ and the answer he got was
no more than a single sentence. “Love the Lord, your God with all your heart
and mind and soul, and your neighbour as yourself”.
Yene Assegid, in her ‘soul shut down’ after years of ‘roaming the world, from
teacher to teacher, program to program, experience to experience’ and diving
deep in her ‘inner world with all its curves and corners’, heard the same answer
deep in her soul. She was in good company as St Augustine of Hippo after
years of roaming realised too that our hearts are restless until they rest in God.
This is wisdom: life stripped of all its complexities, pomp and splendour,
prejudices and foibles, joys and sorrows, dreams and aspirations, sins and
virtues, is simply about our relationship with God – the ‘Universe’ and others
through loving, giving, and sharing.
Yene Assegid timeously points us to the core of life, God, and our role as
channels of God’s love to serve and care for others. In acts of love and
service we and others are enriched making our world a better place.
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A truth attested by inspiring lives like, Nelson Mandela Conversations with
Myself, Vaclav Havel The Art Of The Impossible, Arianna Huffington Thrive, Rumi
Poems of Rumi, John O’Donohue Eternal Echoes, and Martin Buber I and Thou.
Shine: Rescripting Your Life in Partnership with the Universe is a living testament of
a friend of the Universe, lovingly and caringly sharing the experience of her
‘soul shut down’ or what Christian mystics would describe as ‘the dark night
of the soul’, to make us wise in our journey in this life.
― Rt. Revd. Dr. Musonda Trevor Selwyn Mwamba, Assistant Bishop in the Diocese of Chelmsford (Church of England), Rector of Barking and Vicar of St Margaret of Antioch, (Formerly Bishop of Botswana)
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PREFACE
In the past twenty years, I had the chance to work with hundreds of people and
many organizations leadership, transformation and change. Often, especially
during individual coaching sessions, I witnessed strong men and women struggle
with existential issues as they moved through the process of transformation. It
was very moving to accompany people through their challenges, their struggles
and eventually stand in witness to their victories. On the inside, my heart always
ached for and with them in time of pain. While in my role of coach or trainer, I
had to remain calm and composed to actually do my job to serve them best. I
learned a lot in these times. It made me conscious of how vulnerable we are in
life. It made me conscious of the choices that we actually have, right in our
hands. It made me realise the power of commitment and determination; it
brought me up close and personal with the power of faith and courage. It
humbled me. It often brought me to tears as I witnessed resilience in action.
One day I found myself in a peculiar situation. It was about six months after my
family’s relocation from Beijing to Brussels. It was February 2015. It happened
in the mountains in Austria where we had travelled to along with close friends
from Sierra Leone for a skiing holiday. We had a beautiful chalet with a breath-
taking view. The weather was like it’s been pre-arranged. It was the first time in
months that I took a break. For whatever reason this is the time my soul chose
to shut down. It was the first time I took a break in months, possibly years. And
I found myself unable to engage with life. It was a more than a breakdown. A
crisis I had never before experienced.
I remembered all the people I had worked with all the years of my professional
life. I remembered all the amazing transformations I had witnessed before. And
I knew one thing for sure: a crisis can be a gift. Shifting perspectives to find the
gift is the challenge. It’s one thing to know and understand intellectually how
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crisis can be a gift; it’s another ball game to actually embody this inner knowing
and walk the path of transformation. This book is about the process of
embodying the process of change, especially in times of crisis. It’s about
partnering with the Universe to achieve transformation.
What happens during a soul shut down is scary. My own experience of it was
terrifying. I felt exhausted from a lifetime of moving from one country to
another. I felt exhausted from life, from setting up homes, dismantling them and
moving again to set up once more; from setting up projects and leaving them
each time we move as a family; from manifesting and not manifesting the
dreams; from building community and saying goodbye; from witnessing the
changing seasons in people’s lives. It had all been too much. In the recent years
prior to this moment, too many of my friends and family members had passed
away – many unexpected bereavements added to the depletion of my energy.
While I know that the loss of close friends or family is part of life, the tough call
is when a few losses become many losses and death becomes something
common to life; then, making sense becomes difficult. This is when, in my life,
I had unbearable feelings of being overwhelmed. I was in a strange situation. On
one hand I felt this sense of being overwhelmed, and on the other I felt this urge
to learn, understand what was happening so that I could make a turn around for
my own survival.
I never thought I would end up in an ambulance but there I was, in the back of
an ambulance for the second time within three months. Some time before the
ambulance incident, I had collapsed and lost consciousness at home. I did not
take it seriously. I discounted it as part of the usual toll of existence and kept on
going with life as usual. Yet in hindsight, it was clearly a warning. By the time of
the first ambulance incident, my soul felt so overstretched and I could literally
see my energy seeping away. I felt detached but at the same time very consciously
watching the paramedics, as if it was someone else they were working on. I just
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looked. I just watched. I looked everywhere to understand what was happening
and why it was happening. I knew in my heart that unless something changes in
my life, the future did not look good. I took a hard look at myself and asked if
this is the kind of living I wish for? It was not. I realised that whatever is in the
way of the type of life I want; I have to let it go. This book is a result of what I
have found.
What I have found is what happens when life becomes overwhelming and we
can’t see a way back to our authentic energy. Nothing makes sense. It seems as
if hours turn into days and weeks into months and years right before our eyes.
The New Year comes and goes, holidays merge into one another and we remain
on the virtual treadmill of life that keeps going and going. At the same time, our
tasks have to be completed; life and work obligations remain stagnant on
glorified to-do lists. In short, life loses its colour. Flavours become more and
more bland. The simple joys of life become rare and seemingly out of reach.
The effects of exhaustion are alarming to say the least. It’s disorienting. It’s not
a good space to be in. But with a little bit of distance, it can be a gift. When you
find yourself in the middle of it you do have a choice. Either you let your loss of
focus take over and your rapidly empting energy reserves draw you down, or you
can use it as an opportunity for change, a time to re-orient, re-direct, redesign
and rescript your life.
Exhaustion and a sense of being overwhelmed is what can happen when we stop
believing in our dreams and lose our passion for life and in life. My light bulb
moment came while I was asking myself, how can I not give or receive energy?
One of my daughters said matter-of-factly: “Maman, energy cannot be made or
destroyed, it can only be transformed from one form to another, or transferred
from one object to another – it’s basic physics”.
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It’s simple: Whatever energy we have we can maintain, increase or decrease
depending on the thoughts we entertain, the choices we make and the actions
we take. It’s amazing how much energy we can consciously gain or
unconsciously lose. We have the opportunity to be a channel for energy to
support others and ourselves.
My intention here is to show how by engaging with Spirit, with the Universe. It
is this divine spirit that is within us all, whether through prayer or meditation or
just in alone time, we can rescript our lives. We can find ways to use our gifts in
service of others and thereby give our own lives more meaning. By Universe,
Spirit, Divine Power, I am talking about that which is indescribable – God. It is
not about religion, it’s about understanding that we are not just beings of flesh
and blood but in fact spiritual beings connected to the highest power of creation.
And as we design, create and live out our lives we have the choice of partnering
with the power of the Universe to serve our highest purpose.
We need to find the courage to do what we love to do, to follow our dreams,
even if we are already grown up – especially when we are all grown-up. All the
dreams we let go of, all the smiles we have swallowed, all the kindness we chose
to forego, all the fun we forgot to have – all of that costs us energy. It is the cost
of this energy that turns into illness, sadness and dis-ease.
Have you ever wondered, when your the turning point will come? When will it
be time to finally say, ‘enough is enough’? For some it is when we reach the end
of the rope, when we can no longer face another day; for others it’s hearing just
one more unkind comment from someone or being involved in yet another
argument or being sick one more time. It’s when a pattern keeps coming back
and when we finally say “no” to that and say 'yes' to what is not yet. It’s the
space between what was no longer is, and what is to be has not yet happened.
This is a space where both larger-than-life change is possible and at the same
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time where equally large levels of doubt and fear can sabotage the process. It’s
dark. It’s unclear and it’s also invigorating to enter this land of possibilities. The
end of my rope is not the end of yours; it’s different for each person. The only
thing that matters is our ability to recognise that we have reached the end of our
own personal rope and know that it is never too late to turn it around and make
a dramatic, meaningful and amazing transformation. Ideally, we can make the
changes we wish to make before we reach that end. Ideally, we can set up internal
warning signals to let us know when we are on thin ice.
Please join me on this journey where I start to walk my talk and find my own
way back to source. I hope it will bring you both energy and insights to fire you
up, gear you up and launch you ahead to manifest your dreams.
Connect with your inner power right now
You can change your life, if you choose to
You can make that change happen now.
Yene Assegid
Brussels
2015
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RESCRIPTING YOUR LIFE
WORKING IN PARTNERSHIP WITH THE UNIVERSE
What if we had the power to fast forward, rewind, play, pause, change, and
edit our lives as we live? How many of us would go back and forth across the
lines of time to make the best of our lives? Well, I have good news: it is
absolutely possible to rescript our lives.
Yes, you heard me, you read right; it is possible. And it will not only impact
on our lives today, but it could possibly impact not only our lives but those
of lives of generations to come in a positive way.
Of course we can’t technically go back in time, although I would dare say I
believe that time travel is possible through meditation, prayer and healing. For
me time travel happens when we consciously travel to the past, in thoughts,
meaning, prayer or meditation, and consciously choose a new relationship
with what was. So, for example, we keep re-hashing a hurtful incident that
happened in the past. We could go to the time of that incident and explore
various perspectives about it. The most efficient perspective being that no
matter what happened, we can choose our reaction to it. We can choose the
amount of emotions we want to invest in it. And most of all, we can choose
to ask the Universe for help in dealing with the hardship this situation brought
into our lives.
In a similar way, it is possible to change the course of time through making a
few simple lifestyle choices. What is it that we see re-occurring over and over
again despite our wish to have a different reality?
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Being able to rescript our lives gives us the freedom to enjoy living today in
the present while we co-create with the Universe the tomorrow that we wish
to have.
Each one of us is simply an expression of the Universe, each in our own
way. When I see myself in you and you see yourself in me, we are able to
connect at a very different level with depth, compassion and empathy. In
such times we are able to co-create beautiful realities all around us.
When we cannot connect to each other, when I simply see you as separate
from me or when I see myself as separate from the rest; then, I operate in a
lonely vacuum. There is no flow. There is no juice. It becomes hard labour.
In South Africa there is a concept known as Ubuntu. It is best described in the
Nguni phrase umuntu ngumuntu ngabantu which means that a person is a person
through other people or ‘I am because you are’. By embracing this concept
we emerge from the vacuum. We are in a vacuum when we live without
connecting to other living beings, humans as well as animals, even plants. We
float without direction, without anchor. We are just one of many others just
floating. The only sense we have of life is our own ego-driven reality. There
is nothing before and nothing after. There is little or no continuity. When we
speak of life from the ubuntu perspective, the vacuum melts away to make
space for a dynamic system where all things are connected. I see you as a
whole with all your faults and imperfections as well as your qualities and you
see me in the same way. I accept you as you are and you accept me as I am.
We enter a field of communion where we mutually share and feel each other’s
hearts. A oneness emerges. It is in this mindful connection where we can
sense each other. We can laugh and cry together. We can celebrate and mourn
together. We share the burdens and we share the joy. This makes our burdens
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lighter and our moments of joy exponentially expand. A partnership emerges
organically among all beings and this allows the emergence of the best in each
person, in service of the whole.
The action of rescripting our lives can be most effective when we do it with
this sense of interconnectedness with each other and with the universe.
When we understand that the Universe is in partnership with us, when we
allow Spirit to work with us, then we can trust that all the resources we need
will be put at our disposal. All we need to achieve our dreams will be there
every step of the way. All we have to do is to move forward one step at a time
knowing the Universe will provide and being grateful for all that comes our
way.
We don’t need to have a network, a business card or a personal connection
to the so-called ‘right’ people. Once we understand that this is our way
forward, all doubt, all fear, all confusion melt away and are we naturally are
drawn to move forward with Faith, Courage and Audacity.
I can say, “been there, done that” to most things in life, as probably many of
you can. If there is such a thing as an average range of life experiences, I think
there is very little I have not seen or done, or explored. Some experiences
were pleasant, some unpleasant even painful. Some were fun and some silly
or just plain stupid. Whatever these experiences, I know that I would not be
where I am today if I had not gone through them all. At the end of it all, we
come to realise that it’s really the journey that makes us, shapes us and moulds
us into our being.
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So, why is it that despite all these experiences, adventures, blessings, gifts and
so on that we have had, do we still sometimes feel a lingering sense of
emptiness? It’s a sense of not having hit the nail on the head. It’s a sense of
feeling that life is slipping away.
Most of us live with a constant sense of urgency as if we are living to complete
an end instead of understanding that getting there is part of the journey. We
all know the phrase that life is about the journey not the destination. But do
we really truly understand what it means? If we did, would most of us keep
running from one activity to another? Do we really understand that this
mindless activity is the part of the source of our emptiness? I have tried to fill
this void in my own life with work, with sports, with friends, with parties,
with all sorts of things. And at the end of the day, when the dust settles it’s
back again to the same inner void feeling. All the activities are simply a series
of things to do for a short time. And for a short time there is some pleasure
in it, but all too soon, it becomes boring just like the toys from last Christmas.
I know that unless I rescript my life, I will reach a place of no return. I need
to do it to find peace inside my soul. I want to find that which I need to find
so that instead of filling my life with activities, I can fill it with meaningful
action that brings to me and those I interact with abundance, energy, peace,
happiness and fun. I now know how to create such a reality.
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