Volume 13 | Issue 36

from Raj

The ‘Pause’ button is off!

Welcome to the new look Way of the Heart. it has taken a significant amount of willingness to embrace my own ‘Vulnerability’ to make the shift from the structure which has been in place for the past twelve years, moving from the context of a colour magazine, albeit that we called it Journal, to this new and simpler format of a book. And to move from the concept of annual subscriptions to a Membership, to move from a distant relationship with you our reader to a more encompassing Family structure providing greater support and connection between all of us.

As part of our desire to provide you with meaningful reading, something to ‘chew’ on, or get in a ‘tangle’ over, we have used the theme of the first in this new series of companion books to drive straight to the heart of the matter – maleness & femaleness, sexuality and love making. The articles we offer surrounding this are deep and may bring up a lot of stuff. No apologies! It’s no use messing around any longer is it? Along with providing opportunity for renewing my own relationship with Suzanne, these concepts are also providing me with some interesting challenges!

The timing of ‘Vulnerability’ has been perfect. We spent three months apart which created a real opportunity to see the difference between an apparent ‘kingdom’ and the ‘world’ – the energy dynamic of Bali giving Suz the chance to explore her personal goals and spiritual aspirations in the Ashram in Ubud while I stayed in Australia with the business engaging the issues of viability, cash flow, timeframes, etc., and yes, I admit there was some considerably jealousy on my part, at first feeling trapped by the need to perform and maintain momentum while feeling completely unsupported with no ‘apparent’ understanding nor encouragement from my business partner who was living in a different dimension.

This all came about during that space which I know so many of you experienced between March and June – a ‘hole’ in which no-thing happened. I likened it to someone having hit the ‘pause’ button. There was no energy, momentum ceased and certainly nothing I tried would kick start it again, which for someone with my personality (if you understand the Enneagram, I am a seven) is quite simply a

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‘hell’ of a place to be. How perfect! I had to ‘let go’ and experience helplessness or vulnerability.

Change clearly does not occur unless we ‘let go’. It appears as though a vacuum, a pause is required for spaciousness in which the birthing process can unfold – maybe it is that gestation period when all is ‘cooking’ in the womb but there is nothing to show for it? Did you go through this too? I know I was not alone as with many friends we were often sharing that truly “we do not know what anything is for”.

Into this ‘space’ suddenly came a feeling that it was time to share my ‘old’ sailing story, which is really much more about relationship with an old wooden boat that had a personality of its own. I started giving evening talks on Rainbow and discovered something very important again all pertaining to the theme of ‘Vulnerability’. I had to acknowledge that my life has been a continuous unfolding of circumstances designed – gifted to me to bring me to a place where I can choose anew. I came to realize the degree to which I am attached to anything will determine the ‘pain and suffering’ which I am willing to experience. Totally my choice. Further, I realized this had been there throughout my life - all the trials and tribulations of making that crazy trip, the subsequent charter yacht business, my relationship with my wife and my children, the huge financial up and downs. I can now see so clearly the orchestration and the beautiful ‘Flow’ when I ‘allowed’ it to be, by being vulnerable. My willingness when I ‘allowed’ the connection with Suzanne was another expression of seamless flow moving me from New Zealand to Australia and the amazing story with the Journal, to where I find myself right now.

And still it goes on – my life is the vehicle for my transformation and I am the one driving – either braking the momentum in moments of fear, or releasing and allowing the journey to carry me. I am not now, nor have I ever been or indeed could be, a victim of another or circumstance – ever! and this is the first step in vulnerability – to assume full responsibility for all that has ever occurred, is occurring. There is no one ‘out there’ to forgive, nor anyone or anything that ‘needs’ my forgiveness, just me. Just the me who in fear grabs the brake or says, “enough!” and stops the flow of perfection that is always present. Vulnerability is always about taking responsibility and not extending blame. Vulnerability is about allowing me to be swept along by life – the rocks in that river flashing by harmlessly when I do not seek, in terror, to grasp at what is occurring for me. Jeshua’s words, “I need do nothing” mean so much more to me now.

Now, the ‘Pause’ button is off! The wheels are starting to turn again, momentum picking up and we are being carried off into the next round of activity with a whole new impetus to our “Way of the Heart”, Karuna Bali and our own

Volume 13 | Issue 3

personal aspirations. We travel now to distant places, conferences, meeting new people, spending time with our friends in the prisons, sharing and spreading our Love and the guidance that comes through us. I can conceive of no other life nor indeed, a better ‘Boss’ – God, whereby that which we offer to others comes back to us thousand fold every single time.

Thank you so much for being part of this adventure with us, for sharing in the Family – Friends of the Heart indeed. I sincerely trust that the new WAY OF THE HEART with the many benefits that Membership brings will carry you along in joy and fellowship just as it does us. Perfection unfolding, of course!

Raj ❂

To be honest with others about who you are, to speak your truth, is to be vulnerable.

Vulnerability is the most powerful place of being.It is that place where there can be no dissension.

It is also the most fearful place for many of you, because you fear judgment.

You fear that if you open your heart, someone will put a knife in it.

The reality is that when you speak forth your truth you are really allowing the merging of hearts to take place

because vulnerability is irresistible.

When you find that there is truly nothing to defend, your ego has taken a back seat and your heart

is driving you to a place on non-separation.

P’taah from “The Gift” words of ultimate wisdom through Jani King

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