OSHKOSH: A CIVILOSHKOSH: A CIVIL COMMUNITY€¦ · 8/17/2011 · Members, of the Oshkosh Civility...
Transcript of OSHKOSH: A CIVILOSHKOSH: A CIVIL COMMUNITY€¦ · 8/17/2011 · Members, of the Oshkosh Civility...
OSHKOSH: A CIVILOSHKOSH: A CIVIL COMMUNITYCOMMUNITY
The Oshkosh Civility Project
The Oshkosh Civility Project Major Financial Benefactors
SPEAK YOUR PEACE OSHKOSH!
Credits to:• Dr PM Forni Johns• Dr. PM Forni – Johns
Hopkins University• Truckee Tahoe• Truckee‐Tahoe Community FoundationD l th S i A• Duluth‐Superior Area Community Foundation
Members, of the Oshkosh Civility Project Core Team
• Karen Fredrick - West Side Tire & Auto
• Karlene Grabner O hk h A C it F d ti• Karlene Grabner - Oshkosh Area Community Foundation
• Tom Grogan - facilitator - UW Oshkosh
• Karen Heikel - UW Oshkosh
• Sue Panek - Oshkosh Area United Way
• Walter Scott - Independence Financial LLC
• Liz Hebbe U S C ll l• Liz Hebbe - U.S. Cellular
GETTING STARTED
Visit to Truckee‐Tahoe CommunityE l i f ff i D l h S iExploration of efforts in Duluth‐Superior
P li i• Politics• Letters to the EditorBl A d O h i• Blogs – Anonymous and Otherwise
• Economic downturnM d f h bli• Mood of the public
• High visibility incidents – Rutgers & TTucson
OUR GOAL
’ d b• Can’t we do better?• Aren’t we known for friendliness
and hospitality?• We should set a higher mark!We should set a higher mark!• Provide a common framework to
discuss civility‐related issuesdiscuss civility‐related issues.
LET’S AGREE TO AGREE
• This is NOT a campaign to end all disagreements … this is a campaign to make it safe tocampaign to make it safe to disagree.F I i th h t• Focus: Improving the character and quality of interpersonal q y pcommunication.
KEY STRATEGY• Involve all major stakeholders• Attract interest ~ secure buy‐in• Attract interest ~ secure buy in• Work small ~ grow bigger• Encourage grassroots interest & involvement
• We are not just targeting those who are uncivil but those whowho are uncivil, but those who allow uncivilized behavior to happen.
CHOOSING CIVILITY• National speakerR i d th it• Recognized authority
• Provide visibility• Conceptual structure
WHAT WE DID …• Concern ‐> ACTION• Core Group• Formulated Plans• Truckee Leadership Breakfast• Forni Community Breakfast• Forni – Library & School Board• Mayor’s Proclamation• Website• Continued outreach/dialogue• Promotional Materials
CHOOSING CIVILITY
CIVILITY IN THE PUBLIC SCHOOLS
A DAY OF CIVIL DISCUSSION
The people of Oshkosh were urged to reflect on the importance fundamental valuesfundamental values• RespectU d t di• Understanding
• Compassionb f d h
Feb. 24 2011 Walter Scott & Mayor Paul
befitting a proud community with a rich history & heritage of an active, engaged informed and involvedMayor Paul
Esslingerengaged, informed and involved citizenry.
Summer 2011: A Plan for Community EngagementCommunity EngagementBuild on established strengthsAttract interest, attention & buyinFocus on improving communicationFocus on improving communicationNot the “civility police”Civility pledgeCivility pledge
Pledge ... n. a Who’s Signing?gsolemn promise
t tIndividualsO i tior agreement to
do (or refrain OrganizationsBusinessesBoards(
from doing) a t t d d
Boards
stated end.
www.OshkoshCivilityProject.org
Core Team
CommitteeExamples
Communication Events
Speakers Bureau Business Outreach
Education Organization Outreach
________ ________
OSHKOSH CIVILITY PLEDGE
“We build a stronger and more diverse community by activelydiverse community by actively sharing our ideas and opinions with th i th htf l d id tothers in thoughtful and considerate ways. By practicing this basic y y p gcommitment to civility, we learn and grow from one another ‐ even inand grow from one another ‐ even in disagreement.”
OSHKOSH CIVILITY PLEDGET d d d I i t tiToday and everyday, I aspire to practice the following skills...
1. Pay Attention ‐ Be Aware of Others & Sensitive to the Immediate Context of Actions
2. Listen Closely ‐ Understand Other Points of View
3 Be Inclusive W l All D ' E l d A3. Be Inclusive ‐ Welcome All; Don't Exclude Anyone
4. Don't Gossip ‐ Remind Others of the Importance of this Practicethis Practice
5. Show Respect ‐ Honor Others (Especially in Disagreement)
… continued
OSHKOSH CIVILITY PLEDGET d d d I i t tiToday and everyday, I aspire to practice the following skills...
6. Be Agreeable ‐ Find Opportunities to Agree7. Apologize Sincerely ‐ Repair Damaged Relationships
8 Give Constructive Comments 8. Give Constructive Comments, Suggestions & Feedback ‐ No Personal Attacks (Focus on Issues)(Focus on Issues)
9. Accept Responsibility ‐ Don't Shift Blame; Share Disagreements Publicly
LET’S AGREE TO AGREE
• This is NOT a campaign to end all disagreements … this is a campaign to make it safe tocampaign to make it safe to disagree.
• Focus: Improving the character p gand quality of all interpersonal communicationcommunication.
CIVILITY DEFINED• “Benevolent awareness of others”
• Civil ~ when weave restraint, respect and , pconsideration into fabric of awareness
• Civil ~ when we care about others and treat them well
WHAT DOES CIVILITY DO?• Strengthens social bondsbonds
• Reduces stress• Increases satisfactionIncreases satisfaction• Increase work quality• Good for relationshipsGood for relationships• Good for business• Civility does theCivility does the “everyday busywork of goodness”goodness
INCIVILITY AT WORK
>90% of workers experienceCOSTS US ALL
• >90% of workers experience incivility– 50% lost work time worrying– 13% left the company
• >50% American workforce has high stress levelshigh stress levels– >1/3 identifies “people issues” to cause of stress at workW kl d i #2– Workload is #2
• Estimated cost of workplace stress: $300 billion per yearp y
Source: P.M. Forni
NINE TOOLS OF CIVILITY
CIVILITY: CITY & SOCIETY “The
Oth ”
Me, Myself
Other”& I
Known Other Group Unknown
OtherMy Group
Other Group
To be Revisited …
1. PAY ATTENTION
Be aware andBe aware and attend to theattend to the world and the people around you.
2. LISTENMuch of the conflict i li bin our lives can be explained by one p ysimple but unhappy f d ’fact: we don’t really listen toreally listen to each other.
“We in America have hi deverything we need except
the most important thing of p gall—time to think and the habit of thought ”habit of thought.
Norman Cousins
3. BE INCLUSIVE
Welcome all groupsWelcome all groups of citizens working f h d for the greater good of the community.of the community. Remember to “Invite the Stranger.”
O hk hCi ili P jwww.OshkoshCivilityProject.org
4. DON’T GOSSIPDon’t discount the power of your wordspower of your words.
Speaking with consideration andconsideration and kindness is at the h t f i ilheart of civil behavior.
5. SHOW RESPECTDisagree without b i di blbeing disagreeable.Respect includes precognizing that h i l dothers are entitled
to look at the worldto look at the world differently.
The Principle ofThe Principle of Respect for Persons
We ought to treat others as ends in themselves rather than as means for the satisfaction of our immediate
needs and desires
PM Forni
6. BE AGREEABLETwo key ingredients f b i bl ifor being agreeable in conversation:1. The ability to consider that youconsider that you might be wrong.2. The ability to admitthat you don’t know.t at you do t o
7. APOLOGIZE
Be sincere and repair damaged relationshipsrelationshipsSimple, decent pwords, that soothe the br ised so lthe bruised soul: “I’m sorry.”y
Life today is more about feeling good y f g gand less about being good.
“We spend much more time tending to the quality of our emotional lives thanthe quality of our emotional lives than to the quality of our moral lives.”
J h H lb tJoshua Halberstam
8. GIVE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM
Intention must be to help not to humiliatehelp, not to humiliate.
When disagreeing stickWhen disagreeing, stick to the issues & no
l kpersonal attack!
9. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY
Don’t try to shift blame onto others.
Share disagreements publiclypublicly.
CIVILITY: A MODEL
2 Listen1 Pay AttentionMe,
Myself
& I“The
Other”2 Listen
3 Be Inclusive& I Other
5 Be RespectfulAll 6 Be Agreeable
7 A l i
All Others
4 Don’t Gossip!7 Apologize
8 Constructive Feedback8 Constructive Feedback9 Take or Accept Responsibility!
RESPONDING TO RUDENESSS• State the facts
• Inform the other personSIR • Inform the other person how you were impacted by th i ti
SIRtheir actions
• Request that hurtful qbehavior not be repeated
CHOOSE CIVILITY• Engage others• Inform others• Inform others• Learn from others• Learn with othersM d l t bli h• Model or establishideal communityystandards
CHOOSE CIVILITY!CHOOSE CIVILITY!
• It is quite possible to be true to one’s beliefs• It is quite possible to be true to one s beliefs and be civil at the same timeThe issue is not whether to stand firm or to• The issue is not whether to stand firm or to compromise, but how to express our firmnessfirmness
JUST SAY YESJUST SAY YESTO CIVILITYTO CIVILITY
O hk hCi ili P jwww.OshkoshCivilityProject.org