ORLANDOSENTINELSTORY FORMS GUIDE

V E R S I O N 1 . 0

The Orlando Sentinel is edited for two types of readers:

light readers, or scanners, and deep readers.

Our printed product should appeal to both groups; it should

deliver information quickly for scanners, and deliver analysis

and broader meaning for deep readers.

This involves identifying and employing the appropriate story form

at the beginning of the reporting process.

The goal of this guide is to help Sentinel journalists in that task.

INTRODUCTION

O R L A N D O S E N T I N E L

P A G E 2Compiled by: Stephen Komives Sharon McBreen Tom Burton Special thanks to: Sean Holton

CONTENTSEffective LedesBeat Stories - Cops, Courts, GovernmentBrites BriefsMeeting FormatsFirst-PersonQ&A StoriesQ&A Profiles & InterviewsNotebooksVignettesIn Their Own WordsPro-ConKey QuestionsQuizzesTimelinesTab ChartsBreakouts BillboardsCoffin BoxesCharticles Photo Essays & Photo Stories

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566064677680

Narrative in a Single StoryInvestigations: Outline FormInvestigations: Anecdotal FormInvestigations: Narrative FormProfilesReviews

O R L A N D O S E N T I N E L

P A G E 3

EFFECTIVE LEDES

P A R T 1

Effective storytelling begins with engaging the reader. And it would be hard

to find a better example of how to do that with the written word than

the opening paragraphs of Julia Keller’s three-day series on a tornado

that devastated a small Illinois town in 2004.

Not every story runs thousands of words in length, but the writing principles

evident in Keller’s lede could be applied to anything from a brief to a Sunday opus:

Simple, concise sentences. Active verbs. Vivid description. Clear presentation of

fundamental information. Economy of thought. No wasted words. An invitation

to readers to participate directly in imagining the scene being described.

The portion excerpted here amounts to about five inches of type – an amount

that could reasonably be expected to precede the jump from page A1 to inside.

But look at what the writer is able to accomplish in those five inches.

This series won the 2005 Pulitzer Prize for Feature Writing.

P A G E 4

P A R T 1 E F F E C T I V E L E D E S

The first two words boil the story – indeed, the entire 3-day series – to its essence: This is a story about something that happened in just 10 seconds.

Involving the reader directly. This invitation to actually count out the 10 seconds is a challenge that forces the reader to engage his/her imagination and participate in storytelling.

We’re just 35 words into the story, and we already know what it’s about. This sentence might, by itself, work as a lede in a con-ventional sense, but think about how it is enriched by the sentences that immediately precede and follow.

Effective use of foreshadowing

Transition builds suspense, keeps readers hooked as the story flows out of the lede segment.

Use of this technical descrip-tion here hints subtly at the “anatomy of a storm” treat-ment that is to come in more detail as the story unfolds.

How do you outrun the sky? On a fateful day in April, the people of Utica bore the brunt of the awesome power of a tornado.

A wicked wind tAkes Aim

P A G E 5

By Julia KellerCHiCAgO TribUne

Ten seconds. Count it: One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine. Ten.

Ten seconds was roughly how long it lasted. Nobody had a stopwatch, noth-ing can be proven definitively, but that’s the consensus. The tornado that swooped through Utica at 6:09 p.m. April 20 took some 10 seconds to do what it did. Ten seconds is barely a flicker. It’s a long, deep breath. It’s no time at all. It’s an eternity.

If the sky could hold a grudge, it would look the way the sky looked over northern Illinois that day. Low, gray clouds stretched to the edges in a thin veneer of menace. Rain came and went, came and went, came and went.

The technical name for what gathered up there was stratiform cloud cover, but Albert Pietrycha had a better way to describe it: “murk.” It was a Gothic-sounding word for a Gothic-looking sky. A sky that, in its own oblique way, was sending a message.

By John noBle WilfordSpeCiAl TO THe new YOrk TimeS

HOUSTON, Monday, July 21—Men have landed and walked on the moon.

Two Americans, astronauts of Apol-lo 11, steered their fragile four-legged lunar module safely and smoothly to the historic landing yesterday at 4:17:40 p.m., Eastern daylight time.

Neil A. Armstrong, the 38-year-old civilian commander, radioed to Earth and the mission control room here:

“Houston, Tranquility Base here. The Eagle has landed.”

The first men to reach the moon — Mr. Armstrong and his co-pilot, Col. Edwin E. Aldrin, Jr. of the Air Force — brought their ship to rest on a level, rock-strewn plain near the southwestern shore of the arid Sea of Tranquility.

About 6 and a half hours later, Mr. Armstrong opened the landing craft’s hatch, stepped slowly down the ladder and declared as he planted the first human footprint on the lunar crust:

“That’s one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.”

ABOUT BAD VIGNETTES

Long ago and far away, in some unaccredited journalism school in another galaxy,

a misguided teacher told students that a story with a “vignette” or “anecdotal” lede was,

by definition, a well-written story.

Then those students went forth and spread the word, infecting every newsroom across

the cosmos with this poisonous idea.

Editors today are still paying the price. And stories are still being topped with vignettes to

nowhere or anecdotes without a cause. Granted, there are exceptions. Sometimes you are

lucky enough to report on a story where what you can directly observe and describe is so

compelling it cries out to be the lead. An example:

Astronauts land On plain; Collect rocks, plant Flag A powdery Surface is Closely explored

men wAlk On mOOn

P A R T 1 E F F E C T I V E L E D E S

P A G E 6

ABOUT BAD VIGNETTES

Often as not, anecdotal or vignette-style ledes are distractions that get in the way of

good story telling. Unless the scene you are describing (or constructing?)

is central to the actual news of the story (as opposed to simply relating something

colorful you came across in your reporting), chances are it is superfluous.

By Watchme WriteSTAFF wriTer

Randall Mackey takes a sip from his coffee, his with-ered, wrinkled hands clutching the steaming mug as if it’s the last thing he owned.

His golden retriever, Lucky, weaves in and out be-tween his legs as Mackey scans the sky for signs of the weather. Then the 76-year-old plumbing contractor puts his mug on the hood of his pickup truck and ex-hales as if his entire body is about to shudder apart. He walks around to the back of the truck.

Cars whiz by on State Road 436 while Mackey pops the tailgate and starts rooting around in a toolbox, searching for the prop he needs to tell his story. He finds it – and it’s a Phillips head screwdriver.

“That monster…he held the screwdriver just like this,” Mackey barks, as he jabs and stabs at the air with the screwdriver. “And this is how he killed my best friend.”

“He stabbed and stabbed and just kept on stabbin’,” he said. “No man should have to die that way. No dog should have to die that way.”

“Right Lucky?”

Typical bad vignette lead:puts the reader at the scene of the interview, but takes forever to get to the story. The implication is that the reporter’s experiences and observations during the re-porting process are more meaningful than the story.

A better approach: forget the vignette and just tell the story. This lede puts the reader at the heart of the action that makes this a news story.

By i. Get tothepointSTAFF wriTer

Randall Mackey watched his best friend die – stabbed 50 times with a screwdriver in a fight over an engine part.

Mackey was sitting in the living room of his buddy’s mobile home when it happened. The auto mechanic burst through the door and attacked before the two friends could even put down their beers.

“That monster…he stabbed and stabbed and just kept on stabbin’,” he said. “No man should have to die that way. No dog should have to die that way.”

P A R T 1 E F F E C T I V E L E D E S

P A G E 7

BEAT STORIESCops, Courts, GoVErNMENt

Please be alert: Any moment now I intend to go into the newsroom and set fire to myself.

That’s about the only chance I have of getting editors and reporters to understand

that too many of our stories and reviews are too damn long.

Tighten them up, please. And tell reporters that routine court, police and fire stories

are not to be turned into ‘War and Peace.’

— Memo to Orlando Sentinel editors, May 6, 1985,

from former Sentinel editor Dave Burgin

P A G E 8

P A R T 1

SANFORD — The man convicted of shooting his ex-girlfriend to death in front of her congregation at an Altamonte Springs church was calm and quiet Wednesday when a judge sentenced him to life in prison.

The victim’s only family member in the courtroom was not.

“I hate you!” screamed Melody Horne, the victim’s daughter-in-law, as she was led from the courtroom following a short, obscenity-laced rant as the hearing came to a close.

Willie Crowder, 61, of Altamonte Springs was con-victed Oct. 7 of second-degree murder. Witnesses testified that he and his former girlfriend, Ann Horne-Savage, 44, had broken up about two weeks before the shooting.

Still, both went to Sunday services Nov. 2, 2003, at Peaceful Zion Baptist Church. Afterward, witness-es told jurors, Crowder confronted Horne-Savage, demanding that she either return a bed or give him $500.

When she ignored him, he pulled a small handgun from his pocket, shot her in the shoulder and, when she fell to the floor of the church’s fellowship hall, he bent over her and shot her repeatedly in the head, emptying the gun, witnesses said.

Crowder did not testify at his trial. On Wednesday,

he spoke briefly and did not ask Circuit Judge Mar-lene Alva for mercy.

But he did ask the victim’s family to forgive him and said he forgave them -- though for what was not clear.

“God bless them and keep them,” he said.Melody Horne, sitting near the back of the court-

room, let out a sob and wiped tears from her eyes at that point. It was not until several minutes later, once the sentencing was done, that she began screaming.

While things were still calm, defense attorney James Figgatt asked that Crowder receive the mini-mum sentence: 25 years.

“This was a very unfortunate incident,” Figgatt said.

But Assistant State Attorney Karen Mazzola said Crowder had a history of domestic violence.

In 1994, he was convicted of injuring another former girlfriend after breaking a bottle, swinging it at the woman and cutting her, according to court records.

“We need to protect our community, and Mr. Crowder should not be able to walk the streets of Seminole County or anywhere again,” Mazzola said.

She asked for a life sentence.The judge agreed.Crowder said he would appeal.

‘i hAte you’Emotions run high in sentencing of convicted killer

Lede captures news, drama and background.

3 quotes in the story are short, dramatic and move it along.

P A G E 9

P A R T 1 B E A T S T O R I E S

SparSe writing. Concise, packed sen-tences. Make every word earn its right to be in the story.early drama. It doesn’t have to stick to the inverted pyramid, but the news should be near the top.Short background. When one graph is enough, don’t repeat the same three graphs of b-matter from the day before.

When the purpose is to move along the news of the day, eight- to 10-inch short stories or briefs won’t bog down readers and waste their time. Give them the day’s news or drama and let them move on.

Writing short saves space for stories that we want and need to write longer.

Flab. It has been said that the enemy of long and short newspaper stories is average -- stories that should be 10 inches but run to 25.cuteneSS. Government, cops and courts stories often have enough human drama. And if the subject matter is serious – cyclist killed by a motorist, for example – it’s inappropriate to be light-hearted.conFuSion. Beware of making the story unclear. Cut out the extra background, but give just enough context for the reader to keep up with the story. waSted quoteS. Don’t use a quote unless it adds to the story. It’s a myth that some-one else’s voice needs to be there. If it doesn’t advance the story without minimal or no setup, paraphrase or leave it out.overattribution. Make clear at least once the source or sources of the information, but don’t hang it off the end of every graph. It wastes space and annoys the reader.dull endingS. Because a story is short doesn’t mean it has to end with a thud.

WHEN TO USE IT

COMPONENTS

PITFALLS

Felon arrested in gun shopORANGE COUNTY — Wearing an electronic ankle monitor issued to criminal suspects is a fashion

statement that gets noticed in gun shops.That’s exactly what longtime felon Robert Martin of Orlando did last month at Oak Ridge Gun Range,

according to the Orange County Sheriff’s Office.Martin is accused of dropping off two pistols to be repaired despite being a felon, records show. He

used his own name and address during the transaction. Federal and state laws prohibit felons from pos-sessing firearms.

The gun-shop staff called authorities after his second visit Jan. 27, when several employees noticed he was wearing an ankle monitor. It turned out he was serving probation on an earlier conviction and was issued the monitor by county Home Confinement as a condition of his release on another pending charge, records show.

Deputies arrested Martin, 28, late Tuesday on two counts of possession of a firearm by a convicted felon.

He remains in the Orange County Jail without bail.

DAYTONA BEACH — As Jerone Hunter shuffled into the packed courtroom, the father of one of his victims let out a soft murmur: “Dead man walking,” Bill Belanger said to his wife. About two hours later, Belanger had a message for Troy Victorino.

“Bye. Dig a hole,” Belanger said, waving toward the door as Victorino was led from the courtroom, a condemned man. With his face red from sobbing, Belanger let out a huge sigh.

After two years and an exhausting trial, he and the other relatives of the six victims in one of Flor-ida’s most brutal mass murders finally heard what they had been waiting for:

Two of the men who used bats to pulverize the skulls and knives to slash the throats of Belanger’s 22-year-old daughter, Erin, and five of her friends were sentenced Thursday to die by lethal injec-tion.

Circuit Judge William A. Parsons agreed with the jury’s death-penalty recommendation and called the killings “conscienceless” and “unnecessarily torturous.”

“You have not only forfeited your right to live among us, you have forfeited your right to live at all,” he told each of the men during back-to-back sentencing hearings ....

Judge gives 2 killers death sentencesTroy Victorino and Jerone Hunter face lethal injection.

Dramatic quotes set stage for news-intense 3rd and 4th paragraphs.

Identifying the ironic or humorous in an otherwise run-of-the-mill log entry.

P A R T 1 B E A T S T O R I E S

P A G E 1 0

Brites are fun and usually funny. They’re cheeky or bizarre or even gross.

They are often tales of tradition gone awry or of individual quirks.

They allow for a lot of creativity, attitude and humor.

Brites offer a change of pace, a chance to connect emotionally with readers

and are often memorable.

Brites are not feature stories trimmed down.

They should be succinct, clever, but not cute.

“Brites have a tone, sometimes even an edge, distinct from the conventional

straitlaced newspaperspeak. To produce them, writers need confidence, and,

more than anything else perhaps, supportive editors,” says Carl Sessions Stepp,

senior editor of American Journalism Review.

BRITES

P A G E 1 1

P A R T 1

Brites allow for a lot of creativity, attitude and a wide range of forms. They’re arguably the most flexible type of story we do. We should have fun writing them.

COMPONENTS

In the above example, we know from the first couple of sentences that this is going to be something different. The writer adopts an “I’m going to tell you a story” attitude and immediately paints a vivid pic-ture of an odd existence. Below, Virginia-Pilot writer Krys Stefansky creates an award-winning story out of a family that found a goose egg. Note her parallels to the more typical dynamics of mother and child, a tactic that makes this story come alive:

Many brites are told tongue in cheek. The more you, the writer, can keep a straight-faced tone, the better. This story, for instance, followed a good-natured battle between neighbors to outdo each other with their Christmas lights display:

Often they are tales of tradition gone awry, and it is that juxtaposition that makes them work – as in this delightful story headlined, “Couple Weds Amid Friends, Piggly Wiggly Customers”:

It’s hard to say precisely when the trouble began here in the otherwise peaceful and well-manicured subdivision of Sand Lake Pointe. But there is no question as to when it esca-lated.

Jay Miller noted the moment in his computer log. It was Nov. 30, 9:01 p.m. Sitting innocently in the living room of his new home, the lights of his Christ-mas tree twinkling softly be-hind him, Miller happened to glance out his front window.

What he saw took his breath away.

There, across the street, in

the yard of his neighbor’s love-ly Mediterranean-style home, were three enormous, glowing, inflatable Christmas figures —a Santa, a Christmas tree and a smiling snowman — all of them 8 feet tall, the snowman defiantly waving a 3 1/2-foot candy cane in his big snowy hand. They had appeared seemingly out of nowhere.

“This is serious,” Miller told his wife, Cathy. “I know they weren’t there yesterday. And now — now that snowman is mocking me!”

Clearly, a volley had been fired. It could not go unanswered.

Before God, the state of Florida and the iceberg lettuce they married.

He smiled at his dearly beloved as she stood next to the on-ions. She coyly glanced past him at the paprika.

While you want to avoid cliché ledes, there’s nothing wrong with a twist on a cliché. This story, for instance, looked at a new section open-ing up in a downtown cemetery – something that might not normally warrant news:

For Sale: Hot property in downtown gated community. Very quiet neighbors. Lot size: 4 feet by 9 feet. (Headstone not included.)

A brite requires an essence of oddity. Your theme might be a universal one – the search for love, overcoming adversity, a stranger in a strange land – but it needs to have another layer of curiosity. This writer found the proper ingredients in the surreal tale of a crusty, 88-year-old woman whose home was surrounded by the Orlando International Airport:

It’s not easy finding Vaden Wetherbee’s house.

Just ask the telephone re-pairman, or the newspaper carrier, or the three visiting nurses who tried to navi-gate the roads to Wetherbee’s house when she was recover-ing from knee surgery.

The problem is this: Weth-erbee and her son, Billy, live at Orlando International Airport.

Not in the terminal. Not even close.

To get to her house, one must drive to the airport, circle the access roads, dodge tourists and rental-car return-ers and travelers dashing to catch planes.

Follow a twisting, winding route till finally you see Weth-erbee’s mailbox, hidden in the shadow of a radar tower.

More than anything, Mary Beth Horton wishes that the youngest member of her brood would finally leave home, find a mate and have a normal life.

William certainly doesn’t need her anymore. He should be with his friends. Do the things youngsters do. Make

mistakes. Learn from them. And grow up.

“He just won’t leave,” Hor-ton sighs.

William grunts softly. He looks up. Horton looks back.

“He thinks I’m his mom,” she says.

Oh, William. You goose.

Stefansky makes her parallels clear but doesn’t overdo. When it is revealed that the subject is not a human but a bird, it’s done in a clever, succinct way.

The temptation to be cute. Because a brite demands great material to start with, resist the urge to hype. Restraint is noble.

PITFALLS

P A G E 1 2

P A R T 1 B R I T E S

COMPONENTS

PITFALLS

Briefs are used to cover minor news events or provide updates on ongoing stories.

They’re usually written in inverted-pyramid style: a summary lede followed

by additional details in descending order of significance.

Briefs allow reporters a way to quickly get something on the record

and then move on to other assignments.

They should be no more than 4 inches long.

BRIEFS

P A G E 1 3

P A R T 1

This version adds Rafsanjani’s conciliatory remarks.

What follows are three news briefs covering the same event. Rick Kenney, director of the UCF Center for Editing Excellence, offers insights on strengths and weaknesses of each approach.

TEHRAN, Iran – Iran’s hard-line pres-ident marched in the streets of Tehran on Friday alongside tens of thousands of people supporting his call for the de-struction of Israel – remarks that have been condemned around the world. The rally was one of several state-or-ganized anti-Israel demonstrations across the country that drew more than a million Iranians. World leaders have condemned Wednesday’s remarks by President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, who repeated the words of the late Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini, leader of the Islamic revolution, by saying: “Israel must be wiped off the map.”

TEHRAN, Iran – Hard-line President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad marched Friday with at least 200,000 people supporting his call for the destruction of Israel – remarks that have been condemned around the world. State-organized anti-Israel demonstrations across the country drew more than a million Iranians in all, and support-ing rallies were held in Lebanon and Bahrain. Renewing his criticism of the West, Ahmadinejad said: “They become upset when they hear any voice of truth-seeking.” Iran’s influ-ential former president, Hashemi Rafsanjani, tried to soothe tensions, suggesting in his Friday sermon that Israelis and Palestinians decide their conflict in a referendum.

From the top of an Associated Press story. 1. inverted pyramid

The 5 Ws lede emphasizes immediacy, provides some context.

The second sentence adds info about other protests.

Third sentence is the nut graf.

This took no editing (not even copy editing), merely linking consecutive sentences from AP. It misses context, however, that Ahmadinejad continued criticism of the West while Rafsanjani was being conciliatory.

Edited from a longer Associated Press story. 2. inverted pyramid, edited

This version adds news of Ahmadinejad’s continued criticism of the West while Rafsanjani was being conciliatory.

The 5 Ws lede emphasizes immediacy, provides some context, adds details (name, numbers).

The second sentence adds denser info about other protests.

3. radical clarity

TEHRAN, Iran – Two days after he called for the destruction of Israel, Iran’s president marched Friday with 200,000 countrymen who supported his remarks, even as he renewed his criticism of the West. Other countries condemned President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, who had repeated the words of the late Ayatollah Ruhollah Khomeini, leader of the Islamic revolu-tion, by saying: “Israel must be wiped off the map.” But more than a mil-lion Iranians joined state-organized anti-Israel demonstrations across the country, and supporting rallies were held in Lebanon and Bahrain. Iran’s influential former president, Hashemi Rafsanjani, tried to soothe tensions, suggesting in his Friday sermon that Israelis and Palestinians decide their conflict in a referendum.

The lede introduces nut graf to provide context for the news and adds renewed criticism along with details for clarity.

The second sentence recaps world reaction; third sentence juxtaposes other protests.

Here, Kenney does some rewriting to better explain the story.

P A G E 1 4

P A R T 1 B R I E F S

Focus on the outcome rather than the process. Rather than: “The Clermont City Council voted 4-3 Wednesday to increase residential property taxes by 10 percent effective Nov. 15,” Try: “Clermont homeowners will pay 10 percent more in property taxes beginning next month.” Better yet, use the second person: “If you own a home in Clermont, you’ll pay 10 percent more in property taxes beginning next month.”

Provide context. Readers often complain that the news is hard to follow because they lack the background to understand how something happened or why it’s important. The inverted pyramid usually involves plac-ing background information at the end. Due to space constraint, the background information is often left out altogether. This is especially true when wire editors trim longer stories into briefs. How often do we take the first three sentences of an AP story and trim the rest? Those may be the three most important sentences regarding today’s news, but they’re meaningless to the average reader without a way of placing them in context. Often the trick is to take one sentence from lower in the story and weave the information in with the sentences at the top. A similar approach can be taken when writ-ing your own news briefs. Always ask yourself, “Have I provided enough information so the reader will under-stand why this happened and why it matters?” The Poynter Institute calls this emphasis on clearly explaining everything the reader needs to know “radical clarity.” There’s no need to throw out the inverted pyra-mid. But when ordering sentences from most to least important, we need to rethink what makes a sentence important.

Don’t rule out approaches other than the inverted pyramid. The narrative and feature approaches can sometimes be pulled off in six inches or less.

Keep your sentences, especially your ledes, short. The average person has trouble comprehending a sentence with more than 20 words, so pass that point at your own risk. Remember: readers attracted to short items aren’t looking to tackle long sentences.

We often fail to recognize that a topic deserves to be briefed rather than turned into a longer article. Many of our 12-to-18-inch articles can be briefed without leaving out compelling information.

One common mistake (which creates full-blown stories out of briefs) is including all the sources you interviewed even if some add nothing to the story. As you add each new source to a story ask yourself, what does this source add that I haven’t already told the reader?

We tend to let our guard down and get sloppy when writing short articles. Compounding the problem: These items often receive the least scrutiny from editors. Be warned: Some of the most infamous legal cases involving the news media were spawned by news briefs.

A pitfall for wire copy editors: Bringing “radical clarity” to every article may require more time than you have. But although we acknowledge that reality, we must recognize that we’re doomed if we don’t find a way to make more articles more understandable for more read-ers. Expediency does no good if it leaves readers in the dark. As an alternative, try a “triage” approach in which some articles get more attention than others. Rather than reworking every news brief, pick the one or two where you think you can help the reader most.

P A G E 1 5

P A R T 1 B R I E F S

TIPS PITFALLS

The attempt to impose a narrative treatment upon a process story,

such as a school-board or council meeting, often results in stilted, dry prose.

An alternative approach is a quick-hit summary in which the key points of

the meeting and perhaps some of the personalities involved are highlighted.

Continuing coverage of trials can also make effective use of this form.

MEETING FORMATS

P A G E 1 6

P A R T 1

The residents of an east Orange County community are play-ing David to a modern-day Goliath: Wal-Mart. The world’s largest retailer plans to build a 130,000-square-foot, 24-hour

Wal-Mart Supercenter off Curry Ford Road and Econlock-hatchee Trail. It is an area still under development but with a few established subdivisions.

Planned wal-mart rouses fears of noise, congestion

COMMUNITY MEETINGOrange County government officials will have a com-munity meeting Wednesday at 6:30 p.m. at Colonial High School. Wal-Mart officials will be available to answer questions regarding the project. Orange County commissioners will take a preliminary vote on the issue Sept. 20.

WAL-MART RESPONSE Wal-Mart spokesman Eric Brewer said an additional traffic light, included in the site plans, should relieve some of the congestion. Officials also say the Super-center would be “one of our smallest.” They normally average 230,000 square feet.

RESIDENTS’ CONCERNS“The problem is that a Wal-Mart of that size will clog streets with traffic,” said Roberto Martínez, a resident who lives near the proposed site. Other residents say the discount store does not fit the neighborhood, where homes can be worth more than $300,000.

Three stores are within 10 miles of the proposed site.

l

l

l

neighborhood markets

existing Supercenter

OTHER WAL-MARTS

By a. reporterSENTINEL STAFF WRITER

The residents of an east Orange County community are playing David to a modernday Goliath: Wal-Mart.

The world’s largest retailer plans to build a 130,000-square-foot, 24-hour Wal-Mart Su-percenter off Curry Ford Road and Econlock-hatchee Trail. It is an area still under develop-ment but with a few established subdivisions.

Wal-Mart officials describe the new store, which would include a supermarket, a garden section and 607 parking spaces, as “one of our smallest Supercenters.” According to store of-ficials,

Supercenters normally average 230,000 square feet.

However, homeowner associations, which

represent about 800 homes, and other resi-dents fear that the retailer will increase noise and traffic on streets already crowded by trac-tors and crews repairing and widening the lanes. The store, which would be the 21st in Orlando, is expected to draw more than 3,000 daily trips and employ close to 300 workers.

Orange County government officials will have a community meeting Wednesday at 6:30 p.m. at Colonial High School. Wal-Mart officials will be available to answer questions regarding the project. Orange County com-missioners will take a preliminary vote on the issue Sept. 20.

“The problem is that a Wal-Mart of that size will clog streets with traffic,” said Roberto

pleaSe See Wal-mart, B5

Planned wal-mart rouses fears of noise, congestion

residents’concerns:Traffic andnoise will increase.The discountstore does not fitthe neighborhood,where homes can beworth more than$300,000.

Wal-martsays:A traffic lightshould reducecongestion.The 130,000-square-foot Supercenteris one of the “smallestSupercenters.”Supercentersaverage 230,000 square feet.

from local & State front, 08.22.05: the jump:

Wal-mart from B1

Martínez, a resident who lives near the proposed site.

Wal-Mart spokesman Eric Brewer understands the resi-dents’ concern with traffic, but said an additional traffic light, included in the site plans, should relieve some of the con-gestion.

This is not the first time that a proposed Wal-Mart store has angered Floridians. Residents in Miramar, Hudson, Gaines-ville, St. Petersburg and Boyn-ton Beach are fighting similar battles. The Seminole County Commission in 2000 rejected a proposal for a Wal-Mart Super-center after residents protested.

Some residents say that the store, known for its low prices, is a bad fit in their neighborhood.

“We didn’t pay more than $300,000 to live next to that place [Wal-Mart Supercenter],” said Antonio Rubio, a resident of The Preserves, a gated com-munity behind the site.

Homes in The Preserves and at nearby Fountains at Rio Pinar, which is under construc-tion, are valued at more than $300,000, according to records at the Orange County Property Appraiser.

There are two Wal-Mart Neighborhood Markets and a Supercenter within 10 miles of the proposed site.

Orange County Commission-

er Mildred Fernández said she is working with Wal-Mart officials on making changes to the pro-posed structure.

“When they bought their homes, they didn’t know a Wal-Mart was opening there. The original plans called for an Alb-ertsons and some professional offices. That didn’t happen and now they’re upset,” Fernández said. “Wal-Mart officials have been very cooperative, and I think that at the end of the day we’ll be able to please Wal-Mart and the residents with an aes-thetically pleasing store.”

Walter pacheco can be reachedwpacheco@orlandosentinel.or 407-420-6262.

planned wal-mart riles neighborhood

Using a Meeting Format approach (shown below) means the story doesn’t have to jump,

breaks it down into scannable items; highlights the What, So What and Now What

aspects of the story; highlights the reader involvement aspects as well, reduces repetition

and builds more information into the graphic.

P A G E 1 7

P A R T 1 M E E T I N G F O R M A T S

This type of account is common in columns and travel stories, but relatively rare

in news coverage because journalism conventions have dictated that

the journalist not participate in the story.

But the Sentinel has used first-person accounts effectively to complement coverage

of big breaking news, such as Hurricane Katrina and the London terror plot.

This writing form is powerful because it allows for a more direct, conversational tone

and helps readers connect with major stories on a personal level.

FIRST-PERSON

P A G E 1 8

P A R T 1

neighbors unite to bring dignity for dead womanI watched them bury Miss Vera on Saturday.They laid her on the sidewalk at the corner of Maga-

zine Street and Jackson Avenue on the border of the city’s Garden District.

She’d been dead since Tuesday -- the victim of a hit-and-run -- and her body had been sprawled in the street next to a lush little pocket park for four days. The number 29, the New Orleans police code for death, was scrawled in orange spray paint on the sidewalk.

Friends and neighbors had tried to get someone to pick her up, but they’d had no luck.

When a city is sinking and exploding, the bloated, de-caying body of one Hispanic woman isn’t a huge prior-ity.

So Saturday, John Lee, Patrick McCarthy and Maggie McEleney decided it was time someone treated Miss Vera with some dignity. She was, after all, their neigh-bor.

From what I could gather, Miss Vera was in her 60s. She took care of her husband, Max, and two little dogs. Sometimes, she took bus trips with friends to area casi-nos. She liked wigs and pickles.

“Max said Vera would say, ‘When things are bad, you eat pickles,’ ” McCarthy said. “She was a good, decent woman.”

McCarthy, Lee and McEleney took their shovels into the park Saturday morning and began digging under a fierce, late-summer sun. I found them working as I made my way with two colleagues through the debris-filled and looted streets near the heart of New Orleans.

We’d been sent to the sidewalk grave site by three men riding their bikes. They were looking for food and water and medical care. One man had a jagged gash on his left hand. It was badly swollen and turning black. When we first saw them, they were being detained by an officer in fatigues holding a rifle.

“I’ve been trying to get medical attention for days,” the injured man told us. “No one’s even trying to help us.”

As they rode off, one of his friends said, “They’re bury-ing someone down there.”

I was sure I misheard.“They’re burying someone down there,” he said

again.We headed down the block and saw Lee, McCarthy

and McEleney. They were sweaty, exhausted and angry. McEleney was wearing a surgical mask -- to help block the smell -- and limping on a swollen foot. It was too big to fit in a shoe, so she’d wrapped it in a plastic grocery bag.

As we approached the group, it was clear the men didn’t want us around.

“Get out of here!” McCarthy yelled, raising his shovel. “This is my friend here.”

“Patrick, shut up,” said McEleney. “Let the country see this.”

One of them, I don’t remember who, said if we stayed, we should at least help.

I couldn’t argue.So when McEleney took a breather, I took her place.While the men dug and placed the freshly turned

earth on Miss Vera’s burial mound, I went into the park and pulled up some landscaping bricks that formed the edge of a walkway. I dropped the bricks into a milk crate and carried them to the grave.

“I laid those bricks in that garden myself,” said McE-leney, an artist and a bartender. “I never thought I’d be using them for a grave.”

The men carefully laid the interlocking bricks around Miss Vera, creating a low retaining wall to hold the dirt in place. They had no other choice. They’d been warned by authorities not to move the body.

While they worked, the men fumed at a government that they felt had let them down. Where was the help? they asked. What was taking so long? Why were thou-sands of people stranded on roofs and overpasses? Why was their neighbor allowed to lie dead in the street for four days?

“These people didn’t have to suffer,” Lee said.“They had 35 years to get their act together,” spat Mc-

Carthy, who lives a few doors down from where Miss Vera died. “They couldn’t even fix the levee in 35 years.”

When the work was complete, they laid a piece of white plastic tarp over the dead woman and anchored it with more landscaping bricks.

It had a cross painted in the center.“Here lies Vera,” it read. “God Help Us.”They gathered around the grave site, and Janet

Clouden, a friend of Miss Vera’s, placed two red hibiscus blossoms on the tomb and led a brief memorial service. Lee and McCarthy stood silently; McEleney knelt at the burial wall.

“Oh Holy Spirit,” Clouden said, “we ask you to take her into your arms.”

Then it was over.The workers shook hands, with McCarthy telling Lee,

“A better man I have never met.”Lee, who’d softened a bit, turned to me and said, “Re-

member this, the neighbors here came together and worked until they couldn’t work anymore.”

Then those neighbors headed back to their homes. They had no power, no water and no sense when their world might seem right again.

But they had their dignity. And now, so did Miss Vera.

Orlando Sentinel reporter Jim Stratton got his first look at ravaged New Orleans on Thursday. Here is his first-person account.

What i SaW . . .

P A G E 1 9

P A R T 1 F I R S T P E R S O N

This format offers quick insights into a topic in the news.

We pose the questions and provide the answers.

The Q&A story can stand on its own or supplement a more detailed analysis.

It can help readers play “catch-up” on background or behind-the-scenes workings.

And it can be a clip-and-save resource for readers.

Q&A STORIES

P A G E 2 0

P A R T 1

What happened to the external tank on Discovery?

Inspectors discovered that a piece of foam 3 inches long came off a bracket that supports a liquid-oxygen line on the tank.

Who found the problem?A group of engineers and safety rep-

resentatives, the Final Inspection Team, which was doing a routine examination of the tank after Sunday’s launch scrub.

Why is NASA studying this?Because a much larger piece of foam,

weighing 1.67 pounds, came off shuttle Columbia’s tank during launch and dam-aged the ship’s wing, ultimately causing the shuttle’s destruction and the death of seven astronauts in 2003.

Could this piece of foam have damaged Discovery if it had come off during launch?

Engineers say no because it is extremely small, weighing only .0057 pound.

Why does the tank have foam?The foam serves as insulation to prevent

excessive ice buildup from the liquid hy-drogen and liquid oxygen inside the tank.

Questions, answers about the tank

THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

This photo composite released by NASA shows an area (in circle) where a piece of foam insulation fell off a strut, where it attaches to the external fuel tank of Discovery.

P A G E 2 1

P A R T 1 Q & A S T O R I E S

DEFINITION

Question and Answer stories are helpful when an issue needs explaining and a couple of background graphs won’t do the trick. Reporters come up with the questions and sometimes the answers, too. Or, sources can be interviewed, and their responses, often heavily edited, give the answers.

WHEN TO USE IT AND WHY

The method is well suited for issues and ongoing stories at the front of the news. When a person is the focus, it can be a more personal alternative to the standard profile.

COMPONENTS

Clear, short questions. Simple, clear responses that answer the questions.Questions that follow-up the one before, especially if the subject tries to avoid answering.

PITFALLS

The Q&A can enhance a news story, but is not a substitute for explanatory writing. When a person is the subject, make sure to edit the responses. Most people don’t talk in short, readable sentences. Leave out all of the ums and ahs that accompany most live speech.

WHEN TO USE IT

COMPONENTS PITFALLS

DEFINITION

WHAT IS OUC?The Orlando Utilities Commission was established by the Florida

Legislature in 1923, giving it the authority to operate electric and water systems. It is a public utility with the power to build and maintain new plants and set customers’ rates. Most of OUC’s revenue comes from the sale of electricity.

WHO CONTROLS OUC?A five-member governing board. Of those five seats, one is held by

the mayor of Orlando, at least two must be held by Orlando residents, and at least one must be held by residents living in Orange County, out-side city limits. When a vacancy arises, a City Hall nominating board picks a pool of three names, which are sent to the OUC board. The OUC board selects one or rejects all three and forwards the name to the Or-lando City Council, which confirms the appointment. Except for the mayor, board members can serve two four-year terms.

WHAT OTHER TIES DOES THE CITY HAVE WITH OUC?OUC owns hundreds of parcels of land in Orange County. Most of

that land is titled solely to OUC, but some land is titled to both OUC and the city. The city runs its own sewer system apart from OUC, but OUC handles the sewer system’s billing, meter reading and customer service.

WHAT AREAS DOES THE UTILITY SERVE?OUC provides electricity to more than 190,000 homes and businesses

in Orlando and St. Cloud. Its 1,679 miles of water pipes serve 127,000 customers in Orange County, half of them outside Orlando city limits. The utility also operates a relatively new venture offering chilled water to cool large commercial buildings, mostly downtown.

WHAT IDEA IS THE CITY STUDYING?Mayor Buddy Dyer has proposed merging OUC’s water division

with the city’s sewer division. The city’s reclaimed-water system, which provides treated wastewater for irrigation to reduce the demand on drinking water, also could be included. Dyer has said a consolidated water department could be managed by the city, by OUC or by a new, nonprofit water authority that would be formed for that purpose. An Orlando study that recently became public advocates the last choice as a way to make as much as $322 million for the city, but Dyer said he has no preference.

WHERE WOULD THE $322 MILLION COME FROM?Under a scenario laid out by a city consultant, the water and sewer

systems would be sold to a nonprofit water authority, which would is-sue bonds to finance the purchase. The bond debt would be paid off over time by the utility’s customers. The utilities are actually worth much more, according the consultant, but $322 million would be left for the city after existing bonds were paid off. OUC officials didn’t help with the city’s preliminary study but say it has holes. The $322 million estimate assumes that water rates would be increased and that OUC would turn over its savings reserves and retain all of its debt.

HOW MUCH MONEY DOES THE CITY MAKE FROM OUC?The city charges OUC a franchise fee to operate and also collects an

annual dividend. Together, the payment is expected to total $52.4 mil-lion this year, making it the city’s second-largest source of revenue be-hind property taxes. The rest of the utility’s money is used to maintain and operate the system, and make debt payments.

WHAT IF THE OUC BOARD DOESN’T WANT TO GO ALONG WITH THE PLAN?

OUC lawyers say the city can’t do anything without the OUC board’s OK, and state statute and case law seem to back them up.

OUC administrators have proposed taking over the city sewer sys-tem in the past and still favor that option. Board members aren’t likely to support giving away their water division but are willing to study the idea.

Regardless, Dyer now says he will proceed only after building broad consensus and won’t support any outcome that would result in higher rates for customers.

WHAT DO BOARD MEMBERS SAY ABOUT THE IDEA?

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?The city and OUC have agreed the issue needs further study but

haven’t agreed what form the study should take. They have formed a committee consisting of two OUC board members, Perez and Porta, and two city commissioners, Vicki Vargo and Betty Wyman, to deter-mine how to proceed.

[This story ran as an accompaniment to a longer piece about the Orlando Utilities Commission board of directors.]

ouc: A cLoseR Look

tommy boroughS: “Both OUC and the city are going to have to agree. City Hall doesn’t own us, the mayor doesn’t own us, the City Council doesn’t own us. The citizens of Orlando own us.”

lonnie bell: “I think OUC is well-run; they have a great team. If it can be done better, I’d like to see the plan, but right now I’m leaning toward OUC.”

tico perez: “Nothing can impact OUC’s as-sets without OUC taking a role in the decision.”

katie porta: “Our responsibil-ity as board members is to look our for the best interests of our custom-ers and residents.”

buddy dyer: “There’s no question that con-solidating the water resources in one en-tity makes sense.”

P A G E 2 2

P A R T 1 Q & A S T O R I E S

Q&As should be brief; they work best when questions are succinct

and answers are snappy.

Background or biographical information should be broken out at the top.

Incorporating this information into the questions slows the pacing.

Edit the responses for brevity and to remove repetition.

Quote headlines often work well to set the tone for the Q&A.

When the Q& A is used as a sidebar to enhance a news story, be careful not to

repeat information.

Q&A PROFILES & INTERVIEWS

P A G E 2 3

P A R T 1

What made you decide to wrestle gators?

Well, it is something that no one else does. I actually visited my family here in Florida. I saw the park. I fell in love with the park; then I saw the wrestling show, and I said, “OK, that’s what I have to do.” I left everything in Jersey and moved down, and here I am.

What’s the most important thing about wrestling gators?

Concentration. When you don’t pay attention, you get bit.

Any close calls?Yes, a nip on the hand. I was techni-

cally doing everything right. I mean I wasn’t taking chances, and I wasn’t be-ing reckless. However, apparently he got out of my hand. So I guess I wasn’t concentrating on holding him.

Is there any such thing as a “mean” alligator?

They’re all mean. No. Actually, they’re not being mean; they’re just being de-fensive. They don’t want you on their back. If some guy jumped on my back and grabbed my mouth, I’d probably want to bite him too. They all do have their own personalities, kind of like people. And just like people, you do get a grumpy gator once in a while. You can tell right away by the way they act. The grumpy ones are the easy ones. It’s the quiet ones that are dangerous. Those are a little more unpredictable.

What’s the most unusual request you’ve gotten from a guest?

Stick my head in the gator’s mouth. That’s a common one. I’ve had guests offer their children and their spouses as gator food. (Laughing)

How long do you want to continue to do this?

I don’t plan on doing anything else. I’d like to stay here. As far as wrestling, I’ll go until my body decides, “No more.”

What is the most common misconception about alligators?

That they eat people. But alligators are very shy — they don’t want anything to do with people. I always tell guests when the news tells us that so-and-so got bit, they never say what so-and-so was doing to the gator. There are certain times of the year, like now, mating sea-son, where the males are a lot more de-fensive of their females. The females are very protective of their nests. Even then, it’s more of a defensive thing. They don’t see people and go, “Oh, attack!” For a gator, even a big gator looking up at us, it’s too much work.

Do you feel like you have a responsibility for educating people about the outdoors?

Absolutely. Education is definitely important. It will keep you out of trou-ble and help you understand the ani-mals better. A lot of people think a wild animal is mean. He’s not mean; he’s just as scared as we are.

Do you have any pets?Four snakes, two lizards, a turtle and

a chinchilla.

No gators?No gators.

Do you eat gator?It’s good. I’ve eaten it. People say ga-

tor meat tastes like chicken. I always tell them that chicken tastes like gator meat because gators were around first.

thiS WeeK’S SpotliGht: JohnnY matoS

‘Alligators are very shy’

Birthplace: New York City n Age: 33

Wrestling an alligator may be the ultimate in Florida tourism kitsch, but it helped make Gatorland in south Orange County a popular visi-tor destination for decades. Gatorland was Metro Orlando’s first real tourist attraction. Owen Godwin Sr., who founded the park in 1949, hired Seminole Indians to live on the property and wrestle alligators.

Johnny Matos is one of about a half-dozen elite workers — and the only one who speaks Spanish — who tussles with reptiles at the at-traction that bills itself the “Alligator Capital of the World.” Matos, who has worked at the attraction since 2003, spoke with Sentinel re-porter Mark Pino.

[When an individual is the focus, a Q&A can offer a more personal alternative to the standard profile]

P A G E 2 4

P A R T 1 Q & A P R O F I L E S

i don’t want to make anything official right now, but the chances of coming back are very slim.

iF i had a new arm, the chances would be a little better.

the day aFter i pitch, everything is tough. Even washing my hair.

it’S very FruStrating. The most frustrating part is, it’s getting worse. I’m trying to do things to make it better. It just hasn’t worked out. The past month, after I start, I’ve just got to watch what I do at home. Whatever I do has to be slow. Everything has to be slowed down.

iF i Found aladdin’S lamp, my three wishes would be better health for my family, a World Series win and a new arm.

iF i waSn’t playing baSeball, I would have gone back to school. I’m not sure what I would have done, but I’m sure it would have had to do with the out-doors.

when you’re a kid, you do a lot of stu-pid things. You don’t think about safety. You just go out and do it. I’ve jumped off roofs. I’ve blown up frogs with fire-crackers. When you’re a boy and you’re growing up, it’s really never ending.

my kidS like to watch SpongeBob, so that’s probably my favorite cartoon now. Growing up, my favorite cartoon probably was Bugs Bunny.

my Favorite Superhero was Aquaman.

i’m probably a little crazier than most people think. I’m really not scared to do anything. I’m kind of on the edge sometimes. I know I don’t show it a whole lot.

one thing i wouldn’t do is sky dive. But bungee jump and everything else, I’d do. I’ve bungee jumped but not off a cliff or a bridge.

i’ve been married 12 years. I’ve always known my wife. My sister is a little older than me — about a year and a half old-er. My sister and my wife were friends. They went to school together. After high school, it just clicked between us. I knew she was the one, because she really supported me throughout my baseball career. She has been a trooper.

i won’t live in minneSota after I retire. Florida is home. Florida has always been home.

when i’m done pitching, I want people to remember me as someone who took this job seriously and tried to get out there every five days no matter how I felt to do the best I could for this organization. I feel I’ve given 12 years of hard-nosed baseball, not only to the organization, but to the fans, as well.

the beSt advice I ever got was: Never quit. Never quit living up to your dreams. Try not to let anything stop you on your way to your dreams.

i want my epitaph to Say, “Here lies Brad Radke, who loved life, loved his family, loved to fish and tried to help as many people along the way as he could.”

Brad radKe talKS, BoB SanSeVere liStenS

‘i’m kind of on the edge.’Editor’s notE: It was revealed Friday that Brad Radke’s shoulder injury is much

more serious than previously thought and could be season-ending. Earlier in the week, Radke spoke to Bob Sansevere about his injuries and more.

[Here is an inventive way to write a Q&A, from the St. Paul Pioneer Press. From the responses, the questions are understood. So they are omitted.]

P A G E 2 5

P A R T 1 Q & A P R O F I L E S

When was the last time you finished writing a story and realized

you still had good content that didn’t fit the narrative?

Or the last time you began interviewing people for a story only to realize

there wasn’t enough content to justify a narrative?

In both cases, we bet the answer is “recently.”

If we’re right, the solution may be a notebook.

NOTEBOOKS

P A G E 2 6

P A R T 1

P A G E 2 7

P A R T 1 N O T E B O O K S

DEFINITION

A notebook is a collection of short items that all focus on a particular topic or beat. The items often work together to tell a broader story or to give the reader a better sense of an event, place, team or industry.

WHEN TO USE IT AND WHY

Some reporters are assigned a regular notebook. However, there’s nothing that says other reporters can’t produce an oc-casional notebook when the material warrants. For example, hurricanes, elections and shuttle launches all produce tons of tidbits that won’t fit into regular news or feature stories. Also, more than one reporter can contribute to a single notebook.

COMPONENTS

There’s no single way to write a notebook item. In fact, the best notebooks include a mix of items: some funny, some serious; some news items, some slice-of-life stuff. However, there are some general points to keep in mind:

THIS FORMAT ISN’T AN EXCUSE to empty your reporter’s notebook. Pick and choose only the most important or inter-esting items.

KEEP ‘EM SHORT. Three 4-inch notes are better than one 12-inch note.

KEEP YOUR SENTENCES, especially your leads, to 20 words or fewer. Readers attracted to short items aren’t looking to tackle long sentences.

FIVE WS LEADS WORK in moderation, but you shouldn’t shy away from soft or feature leads.

READERS LOVE jUICY QUOTES. Try this format: 1. Feature lead that draws in the reader. 2. A graph or two to set up the quote. 3. A compelling quote. 4. Move onto the next note.

PITFALLS

For reporters assigned a regular notebook, the danger is it can become an afterthought. You get all your other as-signments done and then slam out a notebook by pulling together a few last crumbs from your notes or perhaps rewriting a press release you’d originally ignored. The result is often disappointing for the reporter and reader alike.

Conversely, filling a notebook can become a stressful drain on your time. It doesn’t have to be. With a little planning, you can work a notebook into your regular schedule. For one thing, a notebook allows you to be more efficient be-cause it offers an outlet for information that would otherwise die in your notebook. Of course, it remains a balancing act.

Dave Curtis, who covers University of Florida sports for the Sentinel, says filing regular notebooks can mean less time to work on bigger stories. On the other hand, the search for notebook items keeps Curtis tapped into his beat. “The final verdict: It’s a good thing for the writer,” says Curtis. “It just means I need to be prepared every day and excel at managing my time.”

WHEN TO USE IT

COMPONENTS PITFALLS

DEFINITION

COMPONENTS

Many reporters covering a beat are assigned a notebook. For example, sports reporters covering specific teams file frequent notebooks (example: Seminoles: The Beat). Also, business reporters are asked to file notebooks on their beats for CFB. Other notebooks are more broad-ranging and are filled by multiple reporters. For example, the Insider in CFB is designed to include a wide range of items from various sectors. And of course, a stand-alone notebook can be created when the need arises. For example, notebooks were used to good effect during Hurricane Katrina.

TYPES OF NOTEBOOKS

Situation substitutionThe circumstances are different, no doubt.

But for Florida fans, the news of first-time start-er Joe Tereshinski leading the Bulldogs on Satur-day conjured thoughts of another young quar-terback coming off the bench to beat the Gators in a big game.

The quarterback? Florida State’s Marcus Out-zen, who in his second regular-season start led the Seminoles to a 20-12 victory over UF in the 1998 regular-season finale. His position coach? Mark Richt, now the head coach at Georgia.

On Wednesday, Richt compared the two situ-ations.

“Marcus Outzen grew up being a Seminoles fan,” Richt said. “He knew if FSU offered him a scholarship, he was going. He didn’t care if there was 10 guys or one in front of him. Joe T’s kind of the same.”

P A R T 1 N O T E B O O K S

P A G E 2 8

Here’s an example from Dave Curtis’ Gators notebook. Notice that even in a 4-graph story, Curtis is able to build some suspense and avoid a 5Ws lead. Plus, he ends with an interesting quote.

Here’s an ex-ample from Alan Schmadtke’s Golden Knights notebook. Note that he builds this around humor and a good quote. This isn’t investigative reporting, but it’s an example of a reporter who knew his sources well enough to know where he might get an interesting comment when the weather turned cold.

costly week offLB Mike Peterson didn’t have a happy off week.

He lost about $250,000 in antique cars when a fire swept through the garage of his home.

Finally, here’s an exam-ple from Fred Seely’s Jaguars notebook. It’s brief but compelling.

cool to be coolOrlando’s cool morning temperatures have

made for brisk morning practices this week, and that’s just fine for C Cedric Gagne-Marcoux and DE Clarence Howard, who hail from Canada and Virginia, respectively.

“Great weather. Perfect weather,” said How-ard.

Gagne-Marcoux said: “I like it, but I think liv-ing in Florida all this time has made me soft. When I first got to practice the other day I was like, ‘Oooh.’ But then I got to liking it again.”

Vignettes present distinct perspectives on shared experiences.

They are an effective way to augment reporting on major community events,

such as natural disasters, rallies, memorials, observances, parades and festivals.

Base information — name, age, occupation, etc. —

should be the same for each subject.

Photo and design should be brought into the process early so that

proper space can be allotted and the presentation carefully considered within

the framework of the larger reporting effort.

VIGNETTES

P A G E 2 9

P A R T 1

nereida liciaGaRetired factory worker, 66

Nereida Liciaga proudly

held up a small crocheted

American flag as she

marched.

Liciaga, a retired factory

worker born in Puerto Rico,

said she fears that one day

Puerto Ricans could be

denied legal entry into the

mainland.

“The political situa-

tion on the island is very

unstable right now, and

things here have turned

very anti-Hispanic. Today,

I’m marching with the

Mexicans, but who knows if

I’d need them to march for

me tomorrow.”

eduardo aranGoLawyer, 31

Eduardo Arango arrived

at his Winter Park law office

in the morning in a suit

and a tie for just another

workday. By 11 a.m., he had

ditched the tie and jacket,

rolled up his sleeves and

driven downtown to march.

“I decided I had to be

part of the march,” said

Arango, who was born in

the United States of Cuban

parents.

“I’m a firm believer that

people who come to this

country to work should be

given a chance to achieve

the American dream,”

Arango said. “That’s what

my parents did. . . . Because

of their efforts, I am here.”

paul lloYdStay-at-home father, 51

It was Paul Lloyd’s birthday Monday. He turned 51 on the day

he decided to march for immigrant rights with his 4-year-old son,

William.

“It’s important for him to see our country at work,” said Lloyd of

Orlando, who quit his job as a construction contractor to be a stay-

at-home father. “It’s high time for changes. We have exploited these

people. We starve them and poison them, and now we want to kick

them out.”

A white American in a sea of Hispanic faces chanting slogans in

Spanish, Lloyd said he had one regret: “I just wish I spoke Spanish.”

Faces of Orlando’s immigrant march

P A G E 3 0

P A R T 1 V I G N E T T E S