Module 2 Transformation Focus : Obstacles to the Fulfilment of Your

Desires

• We will take a deep dive into the patterns that get in the way of

you manifesting your desires, dreams, and inner peace. • The trinity of conflicts that interfere with desire fulfillment. • The 9 Main Areas of Conflict that disturb inner peace and

prevent you from manifesting your potential. • Work through your conflicts so you are free to do your Great

Work and live your Great Life. • Feel peace, no matter what’s happening around you. • How to overcome the obstacles to fulfilling your deepest

desires.

Copyright©2016DailyNirvanaEnterprises.AllRightsReserved.

2

Inner Conflict seen through the lens of the Transformation Star The areas of life on the star also show you all potential areas of conflict. At the base, we have the universe, self, and others and what your relationship is to those areas. This is the foundation of the star and it is the trinity of conflicts that can interfere with desire fulfillment. What do I mean by this? If you are at conflict with yourself, the universe, or others, if you aren’t pleased with these foundational relationships inside you, it’s difficult, if not impossible to feel your desires are being fulfilled. How do you feel about your relationship to yourself? Are you kind to yourself? Do you take good care of yourself? How do you speak to yourself? How do you feel about your relationship to the universe? Do you feel like you are supported by life? Do you feel in alignment and supported by the universe? Do you feel abandoned? How do you feel about your relationship to others? Are you pleased with how you relate to others? Are you pleased with how they related to you? 9 areas of life comprise the rest of the star. They are also the 9 Main Areas of Conflict that disturb inner peace and prevent you from manifesting your potential. As we discussed last week, when something is off in one of these areas, it creates inner conflict and disturbance.

3

Now, go back to area of life you chose last week to work on, and add to what you wrote last week.

1. Why you Don’t Have Your Dream Yet: There are two parts to this element. Do part a. first and the go back through and do part b.

a. If the area is not at a 9/10, what are the excuses, the reasons or the

explanations? How did you come to be stuck at the current number? What negative beliefs are getting in the way of you getting to your dream? Tell the truth about what is really going on here. Dig deep. Tell on yourself. Share in detail about what your Inner Wicked Girl saying to you about why you aren’t at your ideal? Is there any mean inner dialogue going on? Are you being really hard on yourself or harsh?

b. Now, go back, point-by-point and argue with everything your Inner Wicked Girl said. What is your Inner Wise Woman saying to you about what is really true here? As you are engaging in this exploration, are any new insights coming through about the truth of the situation? How might you be getting in your own way here? Take ownership and radical self-responsibility for what you are creating in this area. Do the best you can. Together, we will be looking at this more deeply.

2. Compassion and Love: Go deep into your heart and write to yourself

about how it’s all currently okay and will be okay in the future in this area.

Copyright©2016DailyNirvanaEnterprises.AllRightsReserved.

4

Reassure yourself and soothe yourself like a mother would soothe a young child.

Now, re-assess. Some of your negative and limiting beliefs, fears, and doubts should have disappeared just from doing this exercise. For those that remain, read the arguments you wrote against them. Are they strong enough? Are you stuck somewhere? Come to group coaching and share anywhere that you are stuck. Areas of Life – Going Deeper Congratulations on finishing your first pass at at least one Area of your life. The process of creating change occurs on a number of different levels. In this program, we are focused on energetic shifts and shifts that come through taking action. This HomePlay is about Courageous Conversation with yourself, Truth-telling and Taking Aligned Action. Let’s take a deeper look at what you have created. In this exercise, here’s what we’re focusing on:

1. Name your excuses: Understand and awaken to how you are getting in your own way - the excuses that keep you powerless;

2. Claim your dream more fully: expand your dreams of what is possible, really reach and don’t worry about the how, yet; and

3. Make Inspired Targets: start making targets and taking action which will manifest your dream life. It’s in this step that we begin to work on the “Inspired How.” You are the author, you are the conscious co-creator and you can create what you want in this life. You really, truly can!

Enjoy exploring the following: Excuses Go back through your chosen area of life, and find the excuses you have made for why you are not at a 9/10. Here are a few examples of excuses to get you going: I don’t care or I don’t want it anyways. “Being thin is a construct that this society is putting out there, and I don’t need to comply. Look at the paintings from old times in Europe and look at some of the Indian goddesses – many of them were heavier, and it’s fine for me to stay right here too.” (even though this woman secretly longs to be thin, fit and sexy, doesn’t

5

feel good and her health is suffering because she pushes herself too hard and doesn’t pay enough attention to her body. She’s a very spiritual person and loves helping people with transformation; yet, she’s out of spiritual integrity and blocking herself from becoming fully embodied because she ignores her body.) “I am not having sex with my husband, but that’s ok. I’m not a very sexual person and there’s so much more to marriage than just sex. We are raising a great family together and are pillars of the community. I’m fine and I don’t need anything more.” (This woman secretly longs for more emotional intimacy and longs for her husband to connect to her deeply but has given up on this ever happening and is trying to convince herself that things are just fine the way they are.) “I don’t need to make more money. Money is bad and creates trouble in the world. I’ll be a better person if I continue to make less money. Besides, all my needs are met and I don’t need or want anymore.” (This woman secretly longs to have enough money to pay the rent, to buy organic food and to go to Africa and offer their service to children. She also is a crazy good energy healer and there are lots of people in the world who need her gifts. If she learned to get herself out there, she would make more money and she would be healing so many others in the process, but she is scared and this way of thinking helps her to stay in her comfort zone, even though it’s not a particularly comfortable or happy place in some ways.) In looking at these examples, do you see how the person is letting themselves off the hook from going for what they really want? Reporting on what’s happening in your life, like it is the weather, speaking in a passive voice, as if you have no control over the situation. “I just can’t stop eating cake.” “I find myself outside smoking.” “It just doesn’t get done.” “My work just takes over and there is no time to exercise.” “New people just don’t seem to buy my products.” Truth is that we carry our own weather inside, and whether it is cloudy outside or not, it can be sunny on our insides. Once we identify the ways in which we think life is just happening to us, we can start to uncover the underlying causes of the behaviors and get to the real truth.

Copyright©2016DailyNirvanaEnterprises.AllRightsReserved.

6

I don’t have that gene … “I have no motivation.” “All these methods of transformation work for other people, but they don’t work for me.” What a great way to let yourself off the hook by making the genetic argument and claiming that you were born without that gene, that whatever it is just can’t work for you because you are inherently damaged, that there is a piece missing. Most of the time, the real truth is that you don’t want to take radical responsibility for what you are creating in your life. The victim – it’s someone else’s fault and not mine. “My boss didn’t show me how to get promoted. My boss doesn't’ like me anyways.” (Maybe this woman needs to get new job or start a business or find some other way to create job satisfaction?) “I can’t control what I eat because my husband always upsets me.” (Maybe this woman needs to leave her husband or get into marital therapy or relationship coaching so that she can work through her marital stress and get in a more emotionally stable place so she doesn’t need to turn to emotional eating to soothe herself?) “The bus is always late, and it throws off my whole schedule.” (Maybe this person needs to leave a little earlier to compensate for unforeseen delays.) There are some things that truly aren’t are responsibility and are beyond our control. That’s true. Ask yourself whether the point you are considering truly falls in this category, or are you playing the victim. How can you step up and take radical responsibility for the amazing co-creator with life that you are. Everyone else is doing it so it’s ok “Everyone cheats a little, don’t they?” “Everyone lies a little, don’t they?” The fact that you are engaged in this process makes you different than the average human … celebrate your difference and leverage it.

7

Entitlement “I work hard, so I deserve to reward myself with food everyday.” “I’m as good as the other people in my industry, so I deserve the success that they have.” “I’m a nice and good person, so I deserve to have what I want in my life.” It’s a fine line with this one, because there is a partial truth in it. Look for where you are using entitlement as an excuse. Also look for place in which you might need a little more self-care, self-love and appreciation from others. False Centers1 Review what you are written and see if you find one or more of these false centers underlying your reasons for not having your dream:

• I’m Alone • I’m Bad • I Don’t Belong • I’m a Burden • I’m Crazy • I’m Different • I’m Not Enough • I’m a Failure • I Don’t Have • I’m Not Important • I’m Inferior • I’m Invisible • I’m Not Loved • I Don’t Matter • I’m Powerless • I’m Not Safe • I’m Too Much • I’m Unworthy • I’m Not Wanted • I’m Worthless • I’m Wrong

1 This concept is drawn from Feminine Power, the work of Claire Zammit and Katherine Woodward Thomas. I have also added to this list.

Copyright©2016DailyNirvanaEnterprises.AllRightsReserved.

8

Is one of these False Centers showing up as an excuse? What’s the deeper truth? What’s the gift in this false center? We can discuss on our next groups coaching session in more depth. Dreams Go back to your dream your chosen area of life, and edit it to reflect the following:

• Did you really tell the truth about your dreams in this area? For example, if you said that you “just don’t care enough to bother, or I don’t really want X” is this really true?

• Is your dream really big, bold, and scary? Does it give you goose bumps? If you could set “the how” aside, if you could set logistics aside, is this what you would dream?

• Did you write the dream in present tense, as if it is already fulfilled? Not “I would like to lose 20 pounds” but “I am lean and trim, weighing in at 120 pounds.” Or “I am running the business of my dreams and I’m making $10k per month consistently serving my ideal clients.”

• Is the dream written positively, instead of negatively? “I have a core group of amazing mastermind partners and friends” instead of “I don’t feel so alone.”

Set targets In your chosen area, think of a target or two that you could create that will get you closer to your 9/10. For example, “I will do movement practice for 30 minutes 3-5 times this week” or “I will call 2 places to ask if they are open to me offering my free workshop there” or “I will eat 45 grams or less of sugar on 6 days this week” or “I will call one family member per week.” Here are some tips for writing a good target:

• Make at least one of your targets specific, so we can easily determine if you did or did not hit the target.

• You can make one of the targets more energetic, if you like. For example: “I love my shadow as I love my light.” An energetic target can also become more specific as you work with it.

• Targets should be realistic— something you believe can happen, but also a bit of a stretch.

• Take on targets that are proportional to what you can do right now and what you are used to doing. Baby steps are great, but do make sure there is at least a bit of challenge in the target. We need you to get out of your comfort zone, at least a little. The more you get out of your comfort zone, the more change you will see. At the same time, we don’t want to overwhelm you by taking you too far out of your comfort zone.

9

• Targets should take on big stuff that you wouldn’t routinely attempt. They should be part of a bigger plan for where you want to go in your life.

• Targets build on each other. As you learn to take baby steps, you will get more comfortable taking bigger leaps on the foundation you created with your baby steps.

• Targets should depend mostly on you, and not on other people. That way, you can be responsible for keeping them. Give you less excuses!

• Optional: For each target, create an incentive to keep it. The incentive should be: • Something fun that you will look forward to • Could be free or could cost a little money

• Optional: For each target, create an effect or an upshot for not keeping it. The effect should be: • Something that you will do. • Something that you do not want to do, but that you can have a sense

of humor about. • Additionally, the consequence could be something that is good for you.

1 minute of holding the plank position, 1 hour of volunteer work, an extra movement practice that week, etc.

• Write your targets, incentives down and send them to your coach/accountability partner weekly.

When you are having courageous conversations with yourself about your dreams, working through your inner conflicts, and taking aligned action, it creates a deep sense of inner peace, no matter what is happening around you.