Metro Herald, Wednesday, July 9, 2014

Keep Dublin tidy – Please recycle this Metro Herald when you are finished with it

For Brooks’ sake

Brooks scythed: The singer brought down the curtain on the week-long soap opera over the concerts by saying he would play none at all pa

by Wayne campBell

TAOISEACH Enda Kenny has described Garth Brooks’ decision to pull out of all five nights of his Irish comeback gigs as a shock to the system.

Brooks had issued an all-or-nothing ultima-tum last week, saying he would play the five nights at Croke Park or none at all after city chiefs granted permission for just three out of the five gigs, expected to draw 400,000 fans and millions of euro into the capital.

But after promoter Peter Aiken flew to the US for crisis talks, fans’ hopes were dashed.

Mr Kenny said the matter was ‘very badly handled all round’.

He added: ‘It’s a shock to the system in terms of the economy of this city and the rep-utation of our country and I do hope that these kind of issues can be more efficiently handled on the next occasion that they arise.’

Arts minister Jimmy Deenihan said it was an embarrassment for the country, while jun-

ior trade minister Joe Costello accused Brooks of ‘petulance and arrogance,

with scant regard for his pay-ing fans’.Dublin City Council laid the

blame with Aiken Promotions, saying it was ‘very disappointed’.

It added it hoped the promoter would re-consider and reiterated that it granted permis-sion for three nights. Tickets for five nights had been sold ‘subject to licence’ but in breach of an agreement with locals.

However, the GAA said yesterday it had no indication from the council permission might be refused when it first told it of the gigs.

It also emerged that the names and address-es of some residents were used without their knowledge to lodge objections that contrib-uted to the decision by Dublin City Council to refuse permission for two of the gigs.

Germany into final with 7-1 win»p24

Wednesday, July 9, 2014

Now tomorrow will never come for fans as star does The Dance on gig hopes

For Brooks’ sake

7 and routWorld Cup shock as hosts Brazil annihilated

(Please be extra nice to our merchandisers today, some of them may be feeling a bit low…)

No country for Irish men: We crowdsourced today’s headline from our followerson Facebook.com/metroherald andTwitter/@metrohnews.Gordon Williams gets thecredit for the main headline,while tips of the stetson goto Rob Wiles for ‘GarthEvader’, Clodagh Coffey for‘Aiken Breakin Hearts’and Patrick Fagan for‘Oh brother, no Garth now?’You guys rule!

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� METRO HERALD Wednesday, July 9, 2014 D

Wednesday 09/07/14

Ireland’s rate of newsprint recycling is now up to 79%. Keep reading, keep

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Today’s birthdays David Hockney, artist, 77; Tom Hanks, actor, 58; Marc Almond, singer, 57; Jim Kerr, singer (Simple Minds), 55; Courtney Love, singer/actress, 50; Jack White, musician, 39 (pictured).

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Dry in most places. A bright start,with good sunny spells, but cloudwill increase gradually from theAtlantic and patches of mist anddrizzle will develop in westerncoastal areas later. Temperaturesbetween 17°C and 21°C in lightwesterly breezes.

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D Wednesday, July 9, 2014 METRO HERALD �

Trinity is now accepting applications for September 2014:

- Online Postgraduate Certificate in Dementia- Online Postgraduate Diploma in Applied Social Studies

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Time casts its spell on Potter and the gangALL may not be well with thefuture Harry Potter. A new short story by author JK Rowling hints at marriage troubles for Harry andwife Ginny Weasley. Ron is goingbald and Hermione is strugglingto ‘have it all’. The update on theHogwarts heroes is told by Daily Prophet reporter Rita Skeeter. Shespeculates a mystery new scar onHarry’s cheek could be the result of a bust-up with Ginny. ‘Are cracks beginning to show in a union that

the Potters are determined to promote as happy?’ she writes.Rowling’s 1,500-word story onPottermore.com sees Harry – 33 andwith ‘threads of silver’ in his blackhair – reunited with Hermione andRon at the Quidditch world cup. Harry is watching his sons Jamesand Albus play. Ron and Hermionehave a son Hugo and daughter Rose. When the friends are

spotted, they are mobbed by fansfrom all corners of the globe.

Better move over Emma or you’ll get J-floored...

by SEAMUS DUFF

Chest in time: J-Law adjusts her lightweight Dior top at the Paris show Picture: rex


r and the ganges.

3 andack

mione andorld cup.

ching his sons Jamesmione

r

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Chest in time:Chest in time: w adjusts herJ-Law adjusts her

eight Diorlightweight Dior t the Paris

Picture: rexPicture: rex

Pushing it:A shove inthe face isnot usually considereda polite greeting, JenPicture: gettyNew story: Harry (Daniel Radcliffe)

and JK Rowling

EMMA WATSON is shoved by mis-chievous movie star Jennifer Lawrence – who also found herself being given a bit of a slap in the face by critics as the pair attended a fashion show.

Hunger Games actress J-Law had done her best to deliver some Holly-wood glamour at Christian Dior’s Paris

Couture Week event. But instead of basking in the glow of her beauty, snip-ers were quick to tease her for reveal-ing a flash of side-boob on her way in. The 23-year-old put on a leather jacket to cover her modesty.

But under the bright lights inside, But under the bright lights inside, But under the bright lights inside, fashionistas soon noticed she had ap-fashionistas soon noticed she had ap-fashionistas soon noticed she had ap-plied fake tan to her face – forgetting plied fake tan to her face – forgetting plied fake tan to her face – forgetting her milky white legs.

It wasn’t enough to dent Jennifer’s It wasn’t enough to dent Jennifer’s It wasn’t enough to dent Jennifer’s jovial spirits... and luckily Harry jovial spirits... and luckily Harry jovial spirits... and luckily Harry Potter star Emma, 24, didn’t seem to Potter star Emma, 24, didn’t seem to Potter star Emma, 24, didn’t seem to mind getting a faceful of fingers.mind getting a faceful of fingers.mind getting a faceful of fingers.

Meet up with a buddyBuy a new hoodieOr pop out to the 40 footFor a swim in the nuddie

DART hits the spot


40 researchers to get €23m in science fundingRESEARCH and innovationminister Seán Sherlock hasannounced €23million infunding for Ireland’s brightestyoung scientific talent. TheScience Foundation Irelandmoney will support 40 researchers in areas like sustainable energy, cancerresearch, neurologicaldisorders, immunology andmicrobiology. Some of theprojects to be funded includeresearch on the skin, measuresto prevent bowel cancer andlaser technology.

Former Quinn execs seek deal on old businessFORMER executives of the Quinn business empire are part of a consortium looking to secure a deal to buy two divisions of the old business. The Quinn Business Retention Company, headed by Liam McCaffrey, has teamed up with a UK private equity house Endless LLP to buy out the operations from Aventas Manufacturing Group, which took over after it was put in receivership. Sources claim the deal will protect between 650 to 800 jobs in the group.

Mental health disabilities still holding stigmaA NEW survey has shownpeople with emotional, psychological and mentalhealth (EPMH) disabilities face stigma in society. More thanone-third of people with adisability also have an EPMHdisability. According to anEconomic and Social Research Institute (ESRI) study, 80 percent of people with an EPMHdisability find friends andfamily supportive but only 48to 58 per cent of employers,strangers and service providersare. The ESRI said stigma onthe part of the generalpopulation needed to beaddressed.

2,000 vacant homes will be revamped for familiesby ORnA CunningHAM

SOME 2,000 vacant residences will be trans-formed into high-quality family homes in a year’s time, the minister for housing and plan-ning has promised.

Minister Jan O’Sullivan allocated €15million yesterday to bring 1,008 vacant local authority houses back into use, 250 in Dublin. The fund-ing is part of a larger scheme, which sees €30million invested in total this year and near-ly 2,000 houses returned to a livable standard.

She said: ‘I am determined to use every lever available to me to increase the number of social homes. One of the biggest scandals of recent years has been the high number of vacant, boarded-up local authority homes.

‘Today’s allocations will refurbish 1,008 of these units and transform them into family homes. This investment will see nearly 2,000 local authority homes coming on stream over the coming months.’

The minister also promised that the invest-ment would create and sustain hundreds of jobs in the construction sector. At the proposal stage, local authorities were encouraged to consider community-based organisations for their potential to recruit, train and engage long-term unemployed people as part of the refur-bishment programme.

Ms O’Sullivan said the national refurbish-ments would benefit communities by ‘remov-ing an eyesore [and] focal point for anti-social behaviour’.

She added: ‘This is a positive programme that increases social housing supply quickly. I ex-pect many of the new homes refurbished under this programme to be tenanted in the coming months and I intend to issue a report on com-pletions and tenancies of new homes at the end of October.’

Kate Slattery and Ciara O’Dwyer were among the guests at the Beauty Bites and Bubbles event at Zaragoza tapas restaurant on South William Street, an evening of beauty, fashion and delicious food for Metro Herald readers from Zaragoza in association with Benefit cosmetics PICTURE: ABE TARRUSH

Scrub, bub and grub

A fifth of Dubliners don’t lock doorsDUBLINERS are the most likely in the country to leave their front doors unlocked, a new survey has found.

Some 19 per cent of those polled in the Liberty Insurance report admitted to leaving the house without locking it.

Meanwhile, 17 to 24-year-olds were found to be the least safety conscious, with a third of them saying they didn’t lock

the front door when leaving the house and 12 per cent saying they left windows or the patio door open. They were also the least likely to use the alarm, at 23 per cent.

Overall, one in six said they did not lock the door the last time they left their house and only 35 per cent said they put on the alarm.

Launching its Check, Lock

and Leave campaign, Liberty Insurance said a quarter of home insurance claims in July last year were for thefts.

Liberty’s head of marketing, Annette Ní Dhathlaoí, said: ‘We are encouraging people to be more vigilant when leaving the house and inviting people to share their tips via Twitter and the Liberty Insurance Facebook page.’

Union lays waste to 35% Greyhound cut claimA UNION organiser has described as ‘completely misleading and false’ claims by Greyhound Recycling and Recovery that its enforcement of a 35 per cent wage cut on workers is in line with a Labour Court recommendation.

Siptu’s Owen Reidy said the company’s actions contravene a Labour

Court recommendation ‘which stated that further talks should be entered into by management and workers’ representatives to find a solution to the cost crisis in the company’.

Around 70 workers with Greyhound have been on strike since June 17, over the alleged pay cut of up to 35 per cent.

On its website yesterday, Greyhound

said that since strike-breaking labour was taken on to do waste collections, it had seen ‘an increase in customer service provision of 25 per cent’.

Mr Reidy told Metro Herald Siptu had no way of verifying this but if it was like Greyhound’s reading of the Labour Court’s recommendation the claim was ‘without foundation’.‘False claims’: Bins

‘Plan will remove focus for anti-social behaviour’

For the full list of local authority allocations, visit gometro.ie/council-houses

MON TURKEY BREAST TUEs SPICY ITALIAN WED HAMTHURS ITALIAN B.M.T. R FRI TURKEY BREAST HAM

SAT BIG BEEF MELT SUN BLT NEW-

inch only


Irish girl in kidney operation first in UKA TREATMENT that allows for successful kidney transplantation in patients who have rejected previous transplants has been carried out on Coolock teenager Megan Carter for the first time in the UK.

The technique carried out at Great Ormond Street Hospital means children deemed ‘untransplantable’ because of high levels of antibodies, can receive organs through a filtering process called plasmapheresis.

Megan, 14, received a kidney transplant at Temple Street in 2011 which her body rejected.

$10 potato salad joker raises $37,000A MAN who jokingly sought $10 to pay for his first attempt at making potato salad has raised more than $37,000 (€27,000) from a crowdfunding website.

Zack ‘Danger’ Brown, of Columbus, Ohio, says he’s now considering throwing a huge potato-salad party with the money.

It took Mr Brown just six days to raise money from more than 3,400 backers worldwide on Kickstarter. The 31-year-old software entrepreneur told The Columbus Dispatch he did it for the ‘pure enjoyment and silliness of life’.

Great-grandmother hid €140,000 drugs and cashby AOifE Nic ARDGHAiL

A GREAT-grandmother who was ‘preyed upon by others’ has received a four-year suspended sentence for storing €52,000 of cannabis and more than €91,000 in illicit cash at her home.

Julie Nugent, 63, told gardaí ‘foolish-ness, stupidity and thinking I would get a few bob at the end of it’ made her agree to keep the cash and drugs.

The court heard Nugent, of The Ma-ples, Clonshaugh Woods, Clonskeagh, who has no previous convictions, felt ‘physically sick I could be so stupid’.

She pleaded guilty to possessing almost 9kg of cannabis and possessing the cash, knowing it was the proceeds of crime, in December 2012.

Her daughter, Marcia Russell, 42, of Clonshaugh Glen, pleaded guilty to han-dling €91,140, and received a five-and-a-half-year sentence with the final three years suspended for her role.

The court also heard Nugent’s husband had died nine months earlier and her vul-nerability had been preyed upon by others who told her she would be ‘looked after’.

Judge Mary Ellen Ring suspended Nu-gent’s sentence after taking into account her full co-operation and guilty plea.

TIME TO KNUCKLE DOWN AND DO SOME READING: A model wears a FingerReader ring at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology’s Media Lab, to show the instrument which enables people with Massachusetts Institute of Technology’s Media Lab, to show the instrument which enables people with

rs a FingerR ing aTIME TO KNUCKLE DOWN AND DO SOME READING: A model wears a FingerReader ring at the

visual disabilities to read aloud text printed on paper or electronic devices.

Pict

ure

: AP


60 secondsEscapologist ROB ROY COLLINS has wowed audiences with his hair-raising acts of derring-do. He performs at Laya Healthcare’s City Spectacular in Dublin this weekend

Unless you’re working for a mental institution or you have a doctor who can procure you a straitjacket you’re

in trouble

“

You studied law at university. How did you come to trade a career in jurisprudence for such stunts as escaping from a straitjacket while sus-pended from a helicopter?After uni, I went backpacking around Australia and I was struggling to find how to pay my way – I was no good at anything, to be honest. Escapology had always appealed to me so I thought I’d give it a bash. I acknowledge that it’s a random profession to get into. The thing about street performing I’ve always loved is the sense of showmanship behind it. Performing in itself is only one part of the act but it all means nothing without showmanship. You can be an amazing act but it means zero if you don’t have the charisma to work a crowd.

How did you learn the tricks of the trade? I managed to get some great tips from established escape artists who took me under their wing. After that it was a case of practice, practice, practice. Also, I had to spend a lot of time figuring out how I’d come across a strait-jacket because it’s not the kind of thing you pick up in Tesco. The

sale of straitjackets is heavily regulated so unless you’re working for a mental institution or you have a friend who’s a doctor and can procure one on your behalf you’re in trouble. I’ve had many of mine made especially for me.

Have you a favourite? Not as such. I have a couple of fairly bog standard models I use for smaller events and I don’t mind too much if they get a bit trashed, but for world-record breaking purposes you have to have a special regulated ‘Posey vest’, which are pretty hard to come by, so I really look after mine and only use it for major gigs.

How would you describe the process of mastering the art of escapology? You fail miserably, you fail miserably, you fail miserably and then you learn a bit; then you progress to the point where you don’t completely embar-rass yourself. There’s no eureka moment but over time you’ll become more adept at freeing yourself in a shorter time frame. Initially it took me about two hours to escape from a straitjacket but after many sweaty hours of practice I got it down to about two minutes.

Have you sustained any

major injuries? Fortunately, I’ve been pretty lucky. I broke my finger once doing acrobatics while balancing upside down on top of some chairs piled on top of each other. My handstand didn’t quite work out and I somehow landed on my finger. The adrenaline was pumping so I decided to continue as though nothing had happened but the second I walked off stage I was considerably less well composed.

Given the nature of your work, do people buy you unusual Christmas and birthday presents? Funnily enough, I recently got a set of Smith & Wesson handcuffs – one of the best on the market – for my birthday; in truth, I may have been laying hints for a few months beforehand. Nothing beats the feeling of being shackled by a pair of handcuffs and then working your way free by picking the lock with a hairpin. It takes a while to get the hang of it but it’s worth the effort.

You also won a special edition of The Weakest Link devoted to contestants with unusual professions. Was squaring up to Anne Robin-

son a more daunting prospect than dan-gling from a crane in a straitjacket? I managed to wing it and came away with more than £2,000. Anne with more than £2,000. Anne with more than £2,000. Anne was a tough cookie but it takes a lot to faze me – I’ve done shows in Limerick so I know how to psych myself up. know how to psych myself up. know how to psych myself up.

What have been your escapology highlights?Hanging upside down from a Hanging upside down from a Hanging upside down from a helicopter and escaping from a helicopter and escaping from a helicopter and escaping from a straitjacket while dangling by my straitjacket while dangling by my straitjacket while dangling by my ankles was definitely up there. ankles was definitely up there. ankles was definitely up there. And breaking the Guinness World And breaking the Guinness World And breaking the Guinness World Record with the fastest upside Record with the fastest upside Record with the fastest upside down cling wrap escape while down cling wrap escape while down cling wrap escape while hanging from a crane; it was only hanging from a crane; it was only hanging from a crane; it was only two weeks before my wedding so two weeks before my wedding so two weeks before my wedding so it felt special.

Doesn’t your wife despair of Doesn’t your wife despair of Doesn’t your wife despair of your endeavours? Not at all. Not at all. Not at all. She’s my manager. Daragh ReddinRob Roy Collins performs at the Rob Roy Collins performs at the Rob Roy Collins performs at the Street Performance World Championship, as part of Laya Championship, as part of Laya Championship, as part of Laya Healthcare’s City Spectacular, in Healthcare’s City Spectacular, in Healthcare’s City Spectacular, in Merrion Square from Fri to Sun Merrion Square from Fri to Sun Merrion Square from Fri to Sun (free). www.cityspectacular.com.(free). www.cityspectacular.com.(free). www.cityspectacular.com.

and finally...AMERICA: A baseball fan is suing two commentators for €7.5million for mocking him while he had a nap in a televised match. New York Yankees supporter Andrew Rector says Dan Shulman and John Kruk caused him mental anguish when they called him ‘fatty’ and ‘stupid’.

digestWorld

Pistorius witnesses ‘scared off’SOuTH AfRICA: Oscar Pistorius’s defence team will call no further witnesses – as some were put off by the publicity surrounding the case. Lawyer Barry Roux told the Pretoria murder trial: ‘There’s nothing that we can do about it.’ Pistorius (pictured), 27, says he shot dead lover Reeva Steenkamp by accident on Valentine’s Day last year. Final arguments are scheduled for next month.

Stolen Matisse is back at museumVENEZuELA: A Matisse painting worth €2million has been returned to the museum it was stolen from in 2002 after being recovered by the FBI. Odalisque In Red Pants, painted in 1925, is due to go back on show at the Caracas Museum of Contemporary Art this month. The picture was seized by the FBI in an undercover operation in Florida two years ago. The thieves had put a fake in its place at the museum. ‘It’s generally well preserved,’ said Venezuelan culture minister Fidel Barbarito.

by NICOLE LE MARIEISRAEL bombarded the Gaza Strip yesterday as reservists were called up for a possible ground invasion.

Operation Protective Edge, launched in response to scores of rockets launched by Hamas, killed at least 11 people, Palestinian officials said.

Israeli defence minister Moshe Yaalon declared a state of emergency as summer camps and nurseries were shut down and residents were encouraged to stay close to their homes.

‘We are preparing for a battle against Hamas which will not end with-in a few days,’ Mr Yaalon added in a statement.

‘We will not tolerate missiles being fired at Israeli towns and we are prepared to extend the operations with all means at our disposal in order to keep hitting Ha-mas.’ The Israeli mili-

tary said it had received provisional government approval to call up as many as 40,000 reserve soldiers, but had not done so yet.

Some 1,500 other reservists have al-ready been mobilised.

Israel said Hamas militants had launched more than 100 rockets in a

24 hour period.Some were intercepted

by the Iron Dome anti-missile system and none that landed caused fatal-ities, although two peo-ple were wounded by shrapnel.

Tensions have been high since three Israeli teenagers kidnapped last month in the West Bank were later found dead.

This was followed by the murder of a Palestin-ian teenager last week.

Israel gears up for a war with Hamas

Strikes: Smoke in Gaza City

AMERICA: A customer sniffs a strain of recreational marijuana at Top Shelf Cannabis in Bellingham, Washington, on the opening day of legal sales in the state PICturE: aPPolice to exhume

raped girls’ bodiesINDIA: Investigators plan to exhume the bodies of two teenage girls raped and killed by attackers who hanged their bodies from a tree six weeks ago. A top police official said the Central Bureau of Investigation plans to conduct a second post-mortem examination after the cousins were found killed in Uttar Pradesh on May 28. The families of the girls demanded the killings be investigated by the federal agency to ensure impartiality.

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‘We’ve kind of been through our career with someone who has been through ex-actly the same thing,’ he said. ‘That makes such a difference. Especially with the career we’ve had. There have been times when things haven’t worked but it’s good to go through it with somebody else.

‘That keeps your feet on the ground. If you were left to your own devices, you could… it’s pretty intense.’

Voted ‘most popular’ at the National Tel-evision Awards for 13 straight years, the

Byker Grove graduates are enjoying unri-valled affection and say there is little chance of them splitting up. ‘ O u r career is

built on a friendship, not

a friendship built on a career,’ said Dec.

Ant turned to his old pal and quipped: ‘There are no solo

projects in the pipeline. There are none for me.

‘I don’t know about you, un-less there is something you haven’t told us!’

The Takeaway On Tour comes to the O2 on September 13

THEY’VE been on our screens for most of their lives and made the smoothest of tran-sitions from child actors to Britain’s favourite presenting double act.

But as they prepare to hit the road with their Take Away on Tour shows, Ant

McPartlin and Dec-lan Donnelly

have revealed they’ve had to support each other through some dark times behind

closed doors. ‘There’s been

tough stuff,’ said Donnelly of the duo’s 25-year bromance. ‘There’s been times when it has been tough professionally. Not always behind the scenes is it sunny.’

Sticky patches the friends have faced include tak-ing a break from their beloved Sat-urday Night Take Away and trying to crack America.

‘We went off and tried other stuff. Some of it worked. Some of it didn’t,’ Donnelly told me. ‘We had a production company. Un-fortunately our managing director died of cancer.’

But the 38-year-old claimed being inseparable means he and Ant are unbreakable.

‘We live in the same street, four doors away from each other,’ he said.

Ant, also 38, concurs.

Geordie duo talk dark times, Cowell’s carrots and TV fix rows ahead of the Takeaway On Tour show

It’s not always easy being Ant and Dec

by AnDREi HARMswORTH

Jasmin Walia breaks a cardinal rule of fashion by showing off both her cleavage and her legs in a revealing yellow dress. But rules were meant to be broken and the 23-year-old Towie star’s boyfriend Ross Worswick seemed happy enough as they burst into giggles. Ex On The Beach hunk Ross, also 23, escorted Walia to OK! magazine’s World Cup summer barbecue PiCTure: GC imaGes

Too revealing?

who cares,

we’re having a

walia of a time...

What chance of a

singalong on tour?‘We’ve talked aboutwhether we should doLet’s Get Ready To Rhumble, our No.1hit,’ says Dec.

On MUsiC

Ant:‘We never see

the judges. We’re

backstage while they

swan around eatingtangerines and

Simon’s

On JUDGEs TheBritain’s Got

Talent ‘fix’ rows irkthe lads. Ant: ‘It doesget a bit exhausting.These “stories” are anon-story most

of the time’

On BGT

Ant: ‘I’d like to try it.’

Dec: ‘I wouldn’t doit. I love a bathroomand fluffy bathrobe.Bear Grylls andcamping... that’s

not me!’

On JUnGLE

Peoplego crazy at the

live shows – Ant: ‘Igot my eardrumperforated! They

hug you that hard.I nearly passed

out’

On FAns

Tough at the top: They’re

full of full of TheyThey’re

smiles but Ant and Dec

have had

knocks PiCTure: iTV

Charlotte Church admitsher dreams of early retirement have beenshattered after she blew most of her millions. Theformer child star, once estimated to be worth€30million, said shecould not afford to be astay-at-home motherafter her career nose-dived. ‘I will have to workfor the rest of my life.Not because I want to but because I have to,’ the 28-year-old told theBBC. ‘The taxman islooking at my accounts

wonderingwhere I’m hiding allmy money.’

Jasmin Walia bryellow dress. But rules wseemed happy enough as they burst inmagazine’s World Clia of a time...

wonderingwhere I’m hiding allmy money

★★★★★★


Lady in red Kim Kardashian sees no reason why mothers can’t have it all. But after the birth of daughter North she admits: ‘There have been times when I didn’t want to get up and work.’

MILEY HAS BRAIN STOLEN IN LIPS VIDEOPop wild child Miley Cyrus loves to shock – but her new music video could be her wierdest work yet. Lying passed out on a bed while surrounded by drugs, and, oh yeah, she’s lost her brain! But fans have nothing to fear – Miley hasn’t lost her mind, it’s just the bizarre storyline behind the Flaming Lips’ new song, titled Blonde SuperFreak Steals The Magic Brain. Miley, 21, filmed the trippy scenes while in hospital in April as she recovered from an allergic reaction.

Coogan: Jolie charity work is off-puttingSteve Coogan claims Angelina Jolie’s efforts to help refugees and rid wars of rape is ‘off-putting’.

The 48-year-old Alan Partridge star, a key figure in calling for press regulation, said some celebrities should stick to what they do best – being celebrities.

Discussing his views with Alastair Campbell in GQ, Coogan said: ‘Though I have been involved politically, I find people who are in the public eye for something else who suddenly start voicing opinions about everything else

quite irritating.’ Campbell added: ‘What? Like Angelina Jolie going out campaigning

with William Hague?’ – making reference to

Jolie’s work to combat rape in war zones.

‘I do find it a bit off-putting,’ Coogan

replied, adding: ‘If you are trying to do something charitable there is always a double-edged sword, because it is good PR

for the celebrity. ‘Better to do it than not

do it, but I have much more respect for a celebrity that goes out [campaigning] about something really difficult.’

Cara aims at press in new Twitter rant

Dylan Penn delivered pizzas after her

parents cut off her finances. The 23-year-old daughter of Sean Penn and Robin Wright told V magazine: ‘I’m glad I did it.’

★ Taylor looking to keep making the Swift buckTaylorSwift may be worthmore than€45million– butwants to rake inevery penny forher ditties. The 24-year-oldsinger blasted illegaldownloads and said: ‘It’s my opinion that music should notbe free.’ In an editorial for theWall Street Journal, she said theprice of an album would bebased on quality. She said itshould reflect the ‘amount ofheart and soul an artist has bledinto a body of work’.

Cara Delevingne seemed to throw her toys out of the pram on Twitter yesterday, moaning about too much press coverage.

Forgetting Kate Moss’s golden rule of ‘never complain, never explain’, the model ranted about stories that were in the papers – including claims she hired a nanny for her bunny and reports she kissed Ellie Goulding.

She wrote: ‘I don’t know if I can laugh anymore at the crap they write in the press. They must be ex-tremely bored at the moment. What is happening in real life is far more interesting than the crap they

write now. They obvi-ously have no imagina-tion.’

after claiming that journalists had a

case of diarrhoea, the 21-year-old tried to appeal to reporters directly, add-ing: ‘Dear journalists, there are so many im-p o r t a n t things go-

ing on in the world. You effect [sic] what people read. Have some re-spect for your jobs.’

Delevingne went on to criticise the paparazzi, who follow her eve-rywhere to capture her extreme fashion statements, late night parties and funny face pulling.

She went on: ‘I got home last night after a 14-hour work day to see around 12 paps waiting for me. I just wanted to see my bun-ny and go to bed.’ She uploaded a clip of the paps to Instagram, which had attracted more than 95,000 likes.

Kristen Stewart has cut off her long brown hair and dyed it copper. Theactress, 24, unveiled her new look at Chanel’s Paris Fashion Week show

yesterday, and said: ‘I feel free.’★

10 METRO HERALD Wednesday, July 9, 2014 D

Destruction sweeps acrossJapan as typhoon hits land by cOn DOHERTy

A TYPHOON has paralysed transport and knocked out power to thousands on the Japanese islands of Okinawa.

The local government said 17 people were injured, one seriously.

Separately, a man was reported missing from a fishing boat in rough seas off Ky-ushu island, to the north.

One of the strongest and biggest ty-phoons to hit during Japan’s summer, Typhoon Neoguri was packing sustained winds of 162 kilometres per hour and gusts up to 216 kph late yesterday, the Japan Meteorological Agency said.

The storm was weakening, but fore-casters said its wide area and slow move-ment could add to the potential damage.

Japan is relatively well prepared for ty-phoons, but torrential rains could cause greater damage if the typhoon moves across the Japanese archipelago as ex-pected tomorrow or Friday.

Local airports were closed and nearly 600,000 people were advised to evacuate their homes, though most stayed put.

There were destructive winds, waves up to 14 metres high and storm surges that were set to intensify as the storm passed the main island of Okinawa in the evening and headed north toward Ky-ushu. Almost 100,000 homes have no electricity.

Television footage showed a building shattered, damaged storefronts and trees toppled as winds picked up in the Okina-wan capital of Naha.

Neoguri is a Korean word meaning ‘raccoon dog’, an animal that looks like a cross between a dog and a racc-oon but is a separate species common in East Asia. Storm force: A wooden house lies in pieces as the typhoon hit Naha, capital of Okinawa island; Inset: A satellite image of Typhoon Neoguri Pictures: reuters

Hospitality exec named in World Cup tout scamA WORLD Cup corporate hospitality executive who is suspected of involvement with a ticket scalping ring was released from police custody yesterday.

Briton Ray Whelan, of the Match group, was arrested on Monday at the Copacabana Palace in Rio de Janeiro, the hotel used by Fifa officials.

Police have described Mr Whelan as the facilitator who allowed a large ring of scalpers to have access to tickets which they re-sold

at vastly inflated prices. Mr Whelan, who will not be allowed to leave Brazil during the World Cup tournament, was detained for questioning after the arrests of 11 people.

He is a longstanding executive with the Match group, run by Mexican brothers Jaime and Enrique Byrom, which paid €88million for exclusive rights to sell more than 400,000 corporate hospitality packages.

Whelan’s attorney told reporters his arrest was ‘illegal and absurd.’

Match said it had complete confidence in Whelan and that he would return to work.

Separately, an Italian and a French citizen, who jointly run a travel agency, were arrested at the international airport in Sao Paulo on Monday.

Police said the two were carrying 48 tickets for the semi-final and final matches – tickets which belonged to ‘one of the big sponsors’ of the World Cup.Ray Whelan: ‘Ticketing ring’

‘copycat’ Facebook behaviour winsFACEBOOK users are more influenced by what their friends download than any other form of app advertising on the social media site, according to a new study.

Researchers from the University of Limerick, University of Oxford and the Harvard School of Public Health examined how online users are influenced in the choice of apps on their Facebook pages.

By developing a mathematical code to simulate people’s online decisions, they found users selected apps on the basis of recent downloads by their friends rather than by being influenced by Facebook’s equivalent to a best-seller list of apps.

The findings conclude that the ‘copycat’ tendency in human behaviour is strong, with popularity of a certain application often determined by the behaviour of others.

Professor James Gleeson, from the University of Limerick’s Department of Mathematics and Statistics, said: ‘This study reveals what drives people to behave the way they do and opens up new possibili-ties for studying human behaviour’.

Published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, it was the first empirical study to reveal that users were strongly affected by the download behaviour of others.Gleeson: Downloads

A good plaice to eat is a question of social scale

THERE have been 50 new ebola cases in SierraLeone and Liberia since last week as the diseasecontinues to spread in western Africa, healthexperts have warned. The World HealthOrganisation says 34 new cases were reported by Sierra Leone and 16 by Liberia since July 3. WHOofficials said yesterday that as of Sunday there havebeen 844 cases in those two countries and Guinea,including 518 deaths.

Fifty new ebola cases in west Africa, WHO warns

SOME fish follow each other’s recommendations onthe best eating spots, scientists have found.Researchers studied the behaviour of two groups ofsticklebacks and discovered familiarity between shoalmembers had an effect on their ability to find food.The fish visited locations already visited by ‘friends’, according to William Hoppitt of Anglia RuskinUniversity, who said ‘factors that affect interactions can influence how individuals exploit resources’.

D Wednesday, July 9, 2014 METRO HERALD 11

wiTH HEAvy HEAD: A ‘Kiliki’

ties his shoelaces in the Spanish

town of Pamplona yesterday during

the San Fermin Parade of the

Giants and the Big Heads made

popular by US writer Ernest Hemingway Picture: reuters

UPC: we won’t give customer data to licence fee inspectors

by bRiAn HUTTOnPLANS for TV licence inspectors to get access to personal subscription records from cable companies to catch evaders have been hit by interference, with the biggest firm saying it won’t comply.

Communications minister Pat Rab-bitte said his scheme would root out the ‘scourge’ of people refusing to pay the tax and boost RTÉ by millions of euro.

After agreement on the crackdown at a Cabinet meeting yesterday, laws are to be in place before the end of the year to allow inspectors to scour bills from the likes of Sky and UPC and cross-check them against TV licence records.

‘Licence fee evasion is an ongoing scourge,’ Mr Rabbitte said. ‘We esti-mate it is running at over 15 per cent.’

An Post is charged with collecting TV licence fees, currently €160 a year per household. But revenue from this is dwindling thanks to the internet, leading to plans for a ‘broadcasting charge’.

Evaders can be fined up to €1,000 for a first offence and more than 400 people

were jailed last year for not paying their TV licence.

The move could see RTÉ’s revenue boosted by up to €30million.

The plan to crack down on fee dodg-ers was quickly thrown into disarray, however, when the country’s biggest cable provider warned it could not hand over customer details as it said the min-ister’s plan would not comply with data protection.

A spokesperson for UPC said: ‘UPC is not in a position to give An Post ac-cess to our cable subscription data be-cause this would contravene our obliga-tions under data protection as the law currently stands.’

A Sky spokesman was less strident, but insisted it would protect its custom-ers’ data: ‘Sky will continue to ensure its customers’ data is safe in compli-ance with all legislative requirements applicable.’

200 Irish celebrities call on Coveney to ban fur farming

MORE than 200 celebs have called on Agriculture Minister Simon Coveney to outlaw fur farming.

Among the stars from the worlds of film, television and music calling for a ban are Saoirse Ronan, Robert Sheehan, Pauline McGlynn and musician Sharon Shannon.

Their call coincides with the release of a video of mink throwing themselves against the bars of an Irish fur farm, described by Aideen Yourell of Irish Council Against Blood Sports as ‘distressing and depressing’.

Despite fur farming being outlawed in the UK and a recent poll showing 79 per cent in favour of a ban here, successive Irish agriculture ministers have declined to ban the lucrative industry.Against fur: Ronan

‘Rape fantasy’ text had dismemberment imageA DUBLIN man sent a former colleague a threatening text message and an image of a dismembered doll as part of his ‘rape fantasy’, Dublin Circuit Criminal Court has heard.

The 39-year-old, who can’t be named, pleaded guilty to harassing the woman between August 2012 and July 2013 and to sending her a menacing phone message and threatening to kill her.

He told gardaí he sent the woman a graphic text message depicting rape, dismemberment and cannibal-

ism. She also received an envelope containing an image of her, taken from her Facebook page, superim-posed on to a picture of her front door, and two images of a dismem-bered doll and a hanged woman.

The man admitted buying the doll, ripping off its arms and pouring tomato sauce on it before he took the photo and to taking the picture of the hanging at the Wax Museum.

The court heard the man had rape fantasies involving the victim.

Judge Mary Ellen Ring adjourned sentencing until later this month.

Terms and Conditions: The competition closes at Midday Friday 11th July 2014. The winners will be chosen at random from the entries received andnotified by telephone or email. Entrants must be over 18 years old. Usual Metro Herald rules apply. The Editor's decision is final. By entering thiscompetition you agree to sign up to the Metro Herald promotions list - To optout text NOMETRO to 51155. SP. Oxygen8 Communications, 4th Floor, MaltHouse North, Grand Canal Quay, D2. Customer Service number 0818 286 606.

To celebrate the release of Dawn of the Planet of the Apes in cinemas nationwide on July17th, we’ve teamed upwith Twentieth Century Fox to give you the chance to win ticketsto an exclusive preview screening on Tuesday, July 15th, 7pm at the Savoy Cinema.

A growing nation of genetically evolved apes led by Caesar is threatened by a band ofhuman survivors of the devastating virus unleashed a decade earlier. They reach afragile peace, but it proves short-lived, as both sides are brought to the brink of a warthat will determine whowill emerge as Earth’s dominant species.

Cert: 12A

Which of the following actors starred inthe original 1968 Planet of the Apes film?

( texts cost 60c+ standard network charge )

Text DAWN, followed by your answer A, B or C,your name, email and postal address to 53133

A) Andy Serkis B) Charlton Heston C) Gary Oldman


Email: [email protected] @metrohnews and #metromailbox

Text: ‘Mail’ to 53131* Facebook.com/ metroheraldMailbox *Please include a name and location. Emails with attachments cannot be received. Texts cost €0.30 per message + standard network

charges. SP. Oxygen8 Communications, 4th Floor, Malt House North, Grand Canal Quay, D2. Customer service number 0818286606 in the know, on the go

Hats, flags, headbands guys are the ones who will lose out

I have to say that I do feel sorry for the Garth Brooks fans who bought tickets for any of the five shows that have now been cancelled.

In my opinion, this whole saga start-ed with a simple case of corporate greed between Garth Brooks, the Gaa and aiken Promotions; they know the rules, they ig-nored them and now they have the affront to complain and plead innocence.

They should not be allowed to just walk away from this. I know tickets are always sold subject to licence, but they knew right from the start these concerts were in breach of the existing agreement with the resi-dents.

It also enrages me that the hotel Federa-tion are complaining about it ruining Ire-land’s image abroad, when they doubled or even tripled their prices for their rooms at the time the gigs were announced.

Kevin

This Garth Brooks five-or-nothing dra-ma is better than any show the guy could have on stage.

What’s he going to do after he’s diverted the ship with his equipment? Raise a black flag? Will he change his hat or stick with his own? Sionnach

For sale: 400,000 stupid pink cowboy hats, 50,000 curiously pointless crocheted Irish tricolour wristbands, 20,000 crudely produced sunglasses (one eye with Irish flag, one with american flag), one portable hot dog stand. Bargain price.

All enquiries to Joxer, outside the bookies, Dorset Street

For all the disappointment around the cancelled Garth Brooks gigs, the real losers will be those hawkers hoping to flog their cowboy hats and headbands. Blame it all on my roots – I’m so embarrassed to be Irish right now. Scarlet Sue

■

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SHIP SHAPE: Alex McGrath sent in this photo taken from the East Link bridge yesterday of cruise ship the Nautica docked in Dublin Port

Quick pic Send your photos to [email protected] with ‘Quick pic’ as the subject

Thanks to the kind young man who gave me his umbrella as I got off the Dart at Tara Street yesterday. He saved me from making a drowned rat impression at an interview. Fingers crossed. Lemon dress

●

gOOD On yATo the woman who got on with a packet

of Flahavan’s at the Museum Luas stop on Monday morning, I’d love to share a bowl with you one morning.

Guy with glasses

●

yEH bIg RIDE

RAnDOM AcTs Of kInDnEss yOuR RusH-HOuR cRusH

TREnDIngAnd it’s off. Always remember where you

were the day #GarthBrooks didn’t come to Ireland. Comedian @pjgallagher

I hear there was nearly talk of anemergency Liveline. @tokonic

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‘If I can’t have 5, I don’t want any’. It’s like me & chocolate bars. @davecaughey

BREAKING: Crystal Swing have offered to step in after #GarthBrooks cancels.#anationholdsitsbreath @philipoconnor

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@metrohnews#metromailbox#GarthBrooks


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Hit parade: Key & Peele, Tom Basden, Rich Fulcher and Amy Schumer are attracting a lot of fans online

The rise and rise of small screen comicsAs Comedy Central and Raybot become the latest online channels to enter the funny fray, Sharon Loughergets lost in the ether

Ever heard of Key & Peele, Amy Schumer or KSI? If your diet of comedy generally comes from scheduled Tv, home of Live At The Apollo and endless panel shows,

the answer is probably no.Key & Peele and Schumer are lively, slick

US sketch acts, while KSI pulls inane stunts and commentates on video games. Between them, their YouTube hits run into tens of millions. And now they’re the flagship names of Comedy Central’s new online channel, which relaunched this week.

You could talk about the new ComedyCentral.co.uk in the same breath as the failed UK version of hit US website

Funny Or Die. After all, it has the same scale of ambition and is going down the same content road, with short, sharp sketches, bite-sized sitcom nuggets, listicles, quizzes and the like.

But whatever warnings Funny Or Die UK may have offered about the vagaries of online broadcasting four years ago when it shut after 18 months – citing financial struggles despite six-figure viewer hits and support from Matt Lucas and David Walliams – Comedy Central isn’t heeding it.

For Sam Delaney, former Heat editor turned Comedy Central digital editor, it wasn’t a case of why launch something new, but why not.

‘Comedy has become such a huge thing online, it would be mad for a brand like ours to not have a presence there,’ he says. ‘Internet comedy is about wasting time. Sometimes it might be clever, sometimes it might be really stupid, but the point is it passes the time. I thought, why didn’t Funny Or Die pick up here? I don’t know the reasons because I’m a huge fan.’

Those reasons might partly be down to the way geography has informed the culture of online consumption. America has a plethora of websites broadcasting funny stuff – in addition to the US version of Comedy Central and Funny Or Die, there’s Buzzfeed, collegehumor.com and cracked.com, plus countless podcasts – all providing a fix in a country where you often have to travel vast distances to see a comic in person. In a dense, compact circuit, there are rooms of all sizes to suit all career levels – seeing stuff live is more part of the regular entertainment diet.

This is why YouTube channel raybot (youtube.com/raybotnic), which launched in May, has been taking a different approach. Its roots are in the live circuit and it’s linked to founder Harry Deansway’s comedy night Shambles, in Kentish Town, north London.

Whereas, KSI aside, Comedy Central UK has a strong slant towards bold American talent, Deansway uses his channel to promote UK-based talent from the ground up, trying to bring his club ➔


comedy to advertise, call 01 7055010

[email protected]

I do stand-up and improv. Sometimes,people say things like ‘I don’t know how you do it – stand-up must be the hardestjob in the world.’ Casting aside my immediate insecure thought ‘Did I make it look that hard?’ I invariably puff outmy chest, gaze enigmatically into themiddle-distance, and say: ‘No my friend. The hardest job in the worldis improv.’

Improv is also the most insanely funand incredibly rewarding job in theworld. Let me explain. Before I dostand-up, I’m waiting off-stage,hyperventilating and rattling withadrenaline, knowing I have to make abunch of strangers laugh for the nexthalf-hour, and hoping to heck I don’t forgetmy gags or mix up my punchlines. When Ido improv, I’m waiting off-stage, absolutely calm, knowing I have to make a bunch ofstrangers laugh for two hours, with nomaterial.

Because with improv, you’re never alone.You’re there with a bunch of other

troopers who are all there ready to catchyou when you fall, to twist and turn with you on flights of pure fancy, andgenerally make being on stage sheer, unadulterated fun. And when theaudience see you’re having fun, theyhave even more fun, and it all becomes akind of vivacious cycle.

Unlike stand-up, it’s not about you. It’sabout the scenes. Whenever a scenebegins, the scene is king, and you’re allthere to serve the king. The king is elected and deposed every few minutes by theaudience. They suggest settings, emotions,characteristics, and accents for every scene,and you put the flesh on the jolly Frankenstein’s monster they have created.

And you have to go with whatever happens. You could be thinking: ‘Ok, I’m gonna come on as a big bombasticsergeant major,’ and as soon as youtouch the stage, someone says: ‘Ah granny,how’ve you been, sing to us about how your foot amputation went!’ and youhave to hop around the stage singing

like a bemused old amputee.You do whatever helps thescene, be it quietly minglingwith background characters,bounding on as a long-lost dog,or delivering an apocalypticpunchline that will end it all. Andthat, my friends, is The Art OfImprov.

Paul Tylak performs regularly withIreland’s longest running comedyshow, the Dublin ComedyImprov, every Monday night in TheInternationalBar, Wicklow Street, and everysecond Thursday in TheWorkman’sClub. (beginningtomorrow,8pm, €8).www.theworkmansclub.com

➔

“One of the most important things for comedy is complete freedom of speech”

regulars to an international audience via licensed videos and specially produced work through his company Lion On Fire. That talent includes Cowards star Tom Basden, eccentric circuit legend Simon Munnery and the Mighty Boosh’s Rich Fulcher.

DeanSway is also championing the work of offbeat musical comic Brett Domino, alter ego of Leeds comedian Rob J Madin.

‘In my opinion, Brett is one of the best new comedians around today,’ says Deansway. ‘He has a limited presence on television, rarely gigs live, yet has millions of views on youTube and makes a living out of his channel.’

whatever kind of site tickles your funny bones, though, marketing is king. Unlike

Deansway, who’s after a committed audience of thousands of views rather than millions, Delaney won’t be drawn on click targets (or indeed investment figures – though with Viacom owning Comedy Central, they shouldn’t be short of a few bob). But both believe that online success lives or dies by marketing strategy.

‘There are lots of independent comedians making hilarious stuff that will never get noticed,’ says Delaney, ‘because perhaps they don’t understand strategy around social media

THE ART OF IMPROV Comedian Paul Tylak

or they don’t have the money to market it like Buzzfeed or the Huffington Post might have.’

‘Comics these days have to be experts in SeO [search engine optimisation],’ adds Deansway. ‘youTube is huge, so you need effective marketing. Raybot ensures acts reach their audience and also make money – we have a company that sells advertising around the videos. at this stage, we’re looking at €130 to €600 advertising revenue for a video that gets 1,000-plus views.’

Until those goals are realised, though, what’s in it for the

comedians? why try to stay afloat in the ocean of the internet? In short: meritocracy, no gatekeepers and direct-line contact with fans. and when it works, it can

produce heroes – take street magican Dynamo.

‘Having worked in comedy for ten years, I’d seen the

wealth of talent on the live circuit. However the leap to TV involves lots of hoop jumping,’ says Deansway. ‘One of the most important things for comedy is complete freedom of speech and on youTube you have that, and that can only lead to great comedy.

‘Most acts would be better staying on youTube than moving to TV, where you have interfering producers who often offer very little. For the first time in history, the artist has the power to be in complete control of

their art – they don’t need to be seduced by old-world media.’

Big hits on the small screen: Rob J Madin’s musical creation Brett Domino (above) and Simon Munnery left)


Five films to see at the cinema

Cold In JulyTaut indie thriller starring Dexter’s Michael C Hall as a mild-mulleted family man who gets dirtied by manslaughter, cop conspiracies and Don ‘Miami Vice’ Johnson.

12

Looking ahead Dawn Of THe PlaneT Of THe aPesfollowing 2011’s Rise Of The Planet Of The apes, this sequel is rumoured to top even its extremely well-received original in terms of guns blazing CGI chimp 3D action.

3

5

4The Fault In Our StarsThe film all the tweens and teens are talking about. a generation-defining weepie about two lovestruck kids with cancer.

The 100-Year-Old ManWho Climbed Out Of AWindow AndDisappearedwhat the title says. aquirky swedish tale, a

bit like forrest Gump asreimagined by the CoenBrothers, that adapts themulti-million-selling novel.

Chefwarming comfort food comedy from Iron Man director Jon favreau who plays/ writes/ directs himself as a disenchanted cook out to get his sizzle back.

A Hard Day’s NightTheBeatles’larky

1964 classic is azesty mess ofanarchic fun, fabsongs and a curiously acute portrait ofcontemporary england.

Acts you’re most keen on catching at Castlepalooza this year...As usual the line up of Irish acts is amazing.Adultrock, Tr One, Meltybrains?, Tvvins and ElaineMai are all must-sees (must-sees: Is that a realword?)

The celebrity you would most enjoy having anatter with as you pitch your tent in the rain...I’m incredibly impatient and cranky when puttingup tents, so Stephen Fry’s voice might calm medown a little.

Celebrity you’d happily share a sleepingbag with...Somebody tiny so that you have a little space Iguess... Kylie Minogue?

Most memorable festival moment...Playing the Body & Soul stage last year at ElectricPicnic. I stood on a table in front of the hugecrowd and just thought ‘Yeah, there is nothingelse I want to do for the rest of my life’.

The festival act that most surprised ordisappointed you…Castlepalooza two years ago was my first timeseeing Adebisi Shank. I hadn’t listened to much oftheir music before then and I spent the wholetime with my mouth open in amazement.

The most gawd-awful/hair-raising/eye-watering festival experience…There’s a couple so bad that Icouldn’t write them down. I once saw a singer try to stage dive buthe slipped and wrecked hisforehead off the barrier railing. Hewas completely knocked out – theentire crowd just went ‘Ooooohhh!’ and the band juststopped playing. Grim.

Ideal pre-dawn playlist for acampsite shindig...As the sun comes up? Far Nearer by Jamie XX; Love’s Got Me High by Terrence Parker; Got Somebody by Moon Boots; then Come Alive by Chromeo as you leave to getbreakfast. Lavley.

Best festival survival tip…Bring a multi-pack of Hula Hoops andleave them in your tent. And aninflatable mattress will changeyour life.

Daithí Performs at Castlepalooza, CharlevilleCastle, Co Offaly, Aug 1 to Aug 3. www.castlepalooza.com

Castlepalooza-bound electro-trad mavin Daithí museson his festival highs and lows

FESTIVAL FIT

THEATRE TALKActor Denis Conway discusses his latest role in Arthur Miller’s The Price at The Gate Theatre

The Price is not a well known play and i have to admit i hadn’tread it until very recently – when i did i was blown away. It’sbasically the story of two brothers whose father died 16 yearsearlier; one brotherWalter, played by BarryMcGovern, is a very successful doctor and theother, Victor, gave up aglittering career inscience to become apoliceman while alsocaring for his troubledfather. Something hasgone down between thetwo brothers that we, asan audience, don’t quite get a handle on for sometime. I suppose the playis about the two brothers comingtogether to forge some kind of understanding –or at least try to – as to what happened in theirlives so many yearsearlier and to trace thereasons why they went in two very different directions.

Victor is just about to turn 50 and is up for retirement butexperiencing something of a mid-life crisis. His marriage to Esther, played by Fiona Bell (pictured with Conway), is on therocks, partly because of the fact he’s racked by indecision as to what to do with rest of his life. His father lost all his moneyduring the 1929 Wall Street Crash and the play opens withVictor sorting through the family furniture which has beenstored in a Manhattan apartment due to be demolished. He hascalled on an evaluator named Solomon – so named for a reason– to come up with a price for the collection, but when Walterarrives on the scene he suggests Victor may have been duped,and not for the first time.

Victor is a godsend of a part because, as an actor, you run thefull gamut of emotions in the course of two fraught hours.He’s such a complex character and what I really like is the wayin which the viewer’s sympathies keep shifting from onebrother to the other as the second act progresses. I don’tquestion Victor’s motives or have a view on him as aperson – that’s the audience’s job. Miller puts a note at theend of the play stating that both actors must play the parts

‘for real’. You couldhave Walter beingplayed as a nasty, self-interestedwell-to-do type whodoesn’t give a s**tabout anybody buthimself and Victor played as a victim allthe way through – butit’s their moralcomplexity that makes the piece so intriguing. By the endpeople are unsure whose side to be onand that’s what makesit interesting.

it’s a tough piece ofwork in many respectsbut it’s also stomach-achingly funny thanks to the character of

Solomon, who’s one of Miller’s most hilarious creations. He’splayed brilliantly in this production by Lewis J Stadlen, theveteran US actor who’s appeared in the likes of Serpico and TheSopranos. Whether he’s a sage or a huckster is difficult to tell. This is a play about family and the price we pay for the choiceswe make in life. There’s no Hollywood ending by any stretch –we come away with a sense of how lives, no matter how flawed, continue on in the face of adversity and anunderstanding that nobody has a monopoly on what constitutes the truth. Daragh ReddinThe Price runs at The Gate Theatre, until Aug 16. www.gatetheatre.ie


EMAnD▲D▲New oN Available to rent/buy now

DeaD awakeSupernatural B-movie inwhich Nick Stahl plays Dylan,a man working in a funeralhome who hits upon theharebrained scheme of fakinghis own death to see whowill attend his burial. Thingstake a further turn for thebizarre at his wake whenRose McGowan pops up asa mysterious stranger withunusual powers.

The Lego MovieWhat looked like anelaborate toy commercialproved an unexpected criticalhit on its cinema release thanks to its strong satiricalcomedy. Chris Pratt voicesconstruction worker Emmet(left, with Batman), who hasto save the Lego universe from doom – which really justprovides the framework for astream of pop culture gags.

BriTain’s YoungesT Carers

C4, 11pm

★

It’s easy to be suspicious ofcelebrities tagging theirname on to reports onsocial issues. But oritséwilliams (above), formerly of chart-topping boy bandJLS, is speaking fromexperience. From the ageof 12 he was a carer for hismother, who has multiplesclerosis, and he knows theimpact that experience canhave on young lives. withan estimated 700,000young carers in the UK, dothey have enough support?

BonesSky Living, 9pm

★

It can be slick and silly but, when Bones puts itsmind to it, it can come upwith a season finale to match the best. This ninth-series cliffhanger is noexception, with Booth(David Boreanaz, above),who is dithering aboutwhether to uproot hisfamily to Germany,uncovering a possible FBI conspiracy that puts his life in danger. It’s going to take all the nerd-like genius ofBrennan (emily Deschanel)and her cohort to savehis bacon…

arChangeLDrama, 9pm

when Daniel Craig starred in this 2005 two-part BBC adaptation of Robert Harris’s novel – shown here in a feature-length edit – global stardom as James Bond was still more than a year way. Craig stars as Christopher Kelso, a historian who sets off to meet the son of Stalin, who is living as a recluse but dreaming of power.

FilmDramaFactual Fun Soaps

sCarfaCeRTÉ2, 11.35pm

Assuming everything finishes on time in São Paulo (see right), why not stay up to say hello to this little old friend? Al Pacino steals the show with a typically bellicose performance as the Cuban immigrant who rises up to dominate the Miami drugs trade, with a star turn from a young Michelle Pfeiffer as his coke-addled wife.

24: Live anoTher DaY

Sky1, 9pmonly two hours left for Jack Bauer to save the world and, as we all know, the darkest hour is before the dawn. or in this case 9pm, but you get the point. while Audrey is pursuing diplomatic channels in a bid to thwart apocalyptic military meltdown – good luck with that – Jack favours a more direct approach.

CoasT ausTraLia

BBC2, 9pmThe final scenic cruise around the fringes Down Under with Neil oliver and his Aussie mates meets up with a merry band of coastal nomads, gets up close and personal with a whale shark and dives among some living fossils. And by that we don’t mean Alf from Home & Away.

one Born everY MinuTeC4, 9pm

Get your weekly fix of birthing pains as we follow the stories of Dan and Heather, who already have three children under five, including twins with cerebral palsy, and are checking in for their fourth. Then there’s Naomi, who appears to be wearing a tent. Apparently it’s called a birthing dress.

hairspraYE4, 8pm

Not the John waters classic, this is the 2007 musical remake adapted from the Broadway show. John Travolta puts a fat suit on as edna Turnblad, mother of perky but overweight teenager Tracy Turnblad (Nikki Blonsky), who dreams of appearing on a TV dance show. Velma Von Tussle (Michelle Pfeiffer) stands in her way.

The fighTerFilm4, 11.15pm

★

This biopic focuses onwelterweight boxer Micky ward (Mark wahlberg,above), who tries to resurrect his flagging career– with the help andhindrance of older brotherDicky (Christian Bale), an ex-boxer who has fallen into alife of drink and drugs.ward’s overbearing motherAlice (Melissa Leo) wants to cash in on her son’s success,leaving ward’s barmaidgirlfriend Charlene (Amy Adams) as one of the fewpositive influences on hislife. Both Leo and Bale wonoscars for their turns.

This oLD Thing: The vinTage

CLoThes showC4, 8pm

★

in ConfiDenCeSky Arts 1, 7pm

David Schwimmer, whose post-Friends career has seen him make some esoteric choices, including taking a turn at directing, reflects on the nature of fame and dealing with the knowledge that at any point in any given day, someone somewhere will be watching him be Ross. Laurie Taylor lends a sympathetic ear.

where does Dawn o’Porterfind these bizarre creatureswith their fashion phobias?Take Pe teacher Ricky. Hisrole models are thechumps in Towie andGeordie Shore yet hewonders why he ends uplooking like every otherhigh-street muppet. willDawn tempt him out of hiscomfort zone?

★Must seetelevision

SportepisoDesBBC2, 10PMIt’s the end ofthe roadfor Pucks andcurtains forSean (StephenMangan) andBeverly’s (TamsinGreig) careerin LA as theirill-fatedsitcom starring MattLeBlanc bitesthe dust. She,for one, can’tget back to England quickenoughbut behindthe scenes,the moversand shakersin themysteriousworld ofAmerican TV are plottingher worstnightmare: anoption on TheOpposite OfUs, a scriptthe duo havehad kickingaround in adrawer foryears. Hangon, isn’t that aJenniferAnistonromcom?

CoronaTion sTreeT

TV3, 7.30pmLeft alone with Michael (Les Dennis) while she shows him the Streetcars switchboard ropes – that’s not easy to say – eileen cannily fishes for information as to how he hooked up with the fragrant Gail. His answer leaves the usually voluble Mrs Grimshaw the very definition of gobsmacked.

eMMerDaLe TV3, 7.00pm

Marlon Dingle (Mark Charnock, below) is not the quickest on the uptake but he suspects something suspicious is going on when daughter April falls ill and the little girl asks for some of ‘mummy’s magic medicine which makes her feel loads better every day’. Could Donna have a serious drug habit? Should she be in charge of a child? As the cogs turn in Marlon’s brain you can tell he’ll be ferreting away until Donna’s secret is forced out into the open.

worLD Cup LiveRTÉ2, 8.00pm

★

Netherlands v Argentina:This could be the Robbenv Messi show as São Paulohosts the second semi-final, with two of the mostpotent attacking forces inthe world Cup going headto head. But while theDutch started on a highwith a rout of Spain, there’s a suspicion that the sidemanaged by Louis vanGaal (above) peaked tooearly, while Argentinahave been building form as the tournament hasprogressed. So we’ll take Messi to prove the match-winner for Argentina: 1-0.

Tour De franCeTG4, 12.45pm

To mark the centenary of world war I, today’s fifth stage pays its respects by starting in Ypres in Belgium, site of one of the conflict’s bloodiest battles. From there it’s a flat and speedy 155.5km to Arenberg Porte du Hainaut, back in France.


Got a problem? No one else can help? Our resident agony aunt tells it like it is

fREE ADvicE fOR…Hilaria Baldwin

dear dolly [email protected]

q My girlfriend always books our holidays, and after

staying in nice-but-dull resorts for the past five years, I insisted that I – for once – decide where we go: Ibiza. She’s going around like I’ve booked a week in Bunclody or something. She doesn’t like the apartment, the area, or that I want to go to Space. Shall I ask one of my mates along instead?

Ryan

a They say opposites attract, and while that can often add an

exciting frisson – retaining outside interests is healthy – it can cause blazing rows. You’ve gone along with her plans for long enough, so I’d tell her that if she’s willing to judge a holiday before she’s even arrived then she’s not welcome, period. You don’t want her moping around the place on principle, either, so tell her there are plenty of day trips to the old town/Formentera if the vibe is too upbeat for her refined tastes.

q World Cup. Wimbledon. British Grand Prix. Tour de

France. I’m not getting a look-in on the TV this summer. What’s a girl to do? Leena

a Netflix is all well and good, however squinting into a

tablet, earphones clamped to your lugholes, while your other half enjoys the surround-sound delights of Eamon Dunphy and company on a 46inch screen is hardly a solution. Some readers might suggest donning your sauciest lingerie in an effort to distract him. Believe me, it just doesn’t work. Even a hot-and-bothered Jennifer Lawrence cannot compete with a sweaty Messi. So if recording all the stuff you love and then hogging the gogglebox once the season finishes isn’t an option, go forth and socialise. Read a book. Walk in the park. If summer isn’t the best time to get a life, I don’t know when is.

LAST TiME:

q My boyfriend of three years pees the bed after a night on

the batter. I thought he might have manned up by now but I was wrong. We’ve started trying for a baby but I’m not sure I want to clean up after two bed-wetters. What will it take for him to understand that this is not cool – or normal – for a 38-year-old man?

Wet Patch

YOU SAiD:

a Tell him he needs to cop the f**k on. If he drinks so much

that he blacks out and the pangs of needing to pee don’t wake him up, he needs to stop drinking so much. Also, why are you cleaning it up in the first place? That’s his disgusting

and embarrassing mess, he should deal with it. Grace Sampson

OvER TO YOU:

q I started seeing a guy and when I received a ‘plus one’

wedding invite I asked him along, as the relationship was going so well. Problem is, it has gone downhill ever since and now I don’t feel comfortable introducing him to my family. Do I break up with him before or after the wedding – we’ve paid for the hotel (and he bought a new suit…)? CF

What do you think? Lend your words of wisdom to [email protected]. Best replies published in the paper. And remember: Dear Dolly can also be found at gometro.ie.

Dear Hilaria, your firstclaim to fame is beingmarried to AlecBaldwin. Wow. Welldone. Your secondclaim to fame isposting Twitter pics of yourself in incongruous yoga poses –literally poses, as opposed to postures – in the bathtub, the carboot, while mowing the lawn. Yoga, unless practised by Madonna, the High Priestess of Narcissistic Exercise, is by itsnature free of ego so this desperate need to flaunt your bendybody is nothing more than exhibitionism. So go take yourastavakrasana into a quiet, darkened, candle-lit, Instagram-freecorner where it belongs. Namaste.

Big-screen hits for your little ’unsAs How To Train Your Dragon 2 roars on to screens tomorrow, Metro Life rounds up Munchkin-friendly fare for the summer

Meet my pet: Will How To Train Your Dragon 2 be as successful as its predecessor?

How To Train Your Dragon 2 (PG)Hotly anticipated sequel to the Oscar-nominated 3D animation that hauled in nearly $500million (€367million) at the box office. Having trained his dragon in the 2010 original, our weedy young Viking hero, Hiccup (voiced by Jay Baruchel), is being pressurised by his father (Gerard Butler) to succeed him as chieftain. Instead, a now grown-up Hiccup sets off to tackle an evil dragon trapper. A strong female character is promised, voiced by Cate Blanchett. Age 5+, out nationwide tomorrow.

The House Of Magic (U)Judging from the trailer, Tim Burton and Toy Story are influences on this European-produced, semi-independent

cartoon. An abandoned kitten called Thunder shelters from a storm in a gothic mansion. It’s home to a retired magician with a house full of all-singing, all-dancing gizmos but long-standing residents are jealous of Thunder and try to get him kicked out. Emily Blunt, Ewan McGregor and William Shatner are among the voice cast. Age 5-11, out Jul 25.

Guardians Of The Galaxy (TBC)Think the new Avengers Assemble, starring Karen Gillan (left). A cocky space adventurer called Peter Quill (Chris Pratt) steals a mysterious

orb from a powerful baddie (Lee Pace) and

finds himself with a bounty on his head. To survive, Quill is forced to enlist the help of a band of misfits including a

gun-toting raccoon (Bradley Cooper) and a tree-like humanoid (Vin Diesel). Meanwhile, the fate of the universe, as ever, hangs in the balance. A Marvel/Disney-produced live-action sci-fi, it’s likely to be bigger than disposable barbecues this summer. Age 10+ (probably), out Jul 31.

The Nut Job (U)Not the latest Ice Age spin-off but

the story of Surly (voiced by Will Arnett), an oddly purple-coloured city park squirrel who prefers to nick nuts than gather them. The plot sees an outrageous nut-store heist unwittingly embroil Surly and his gang in a human bank robbery. If goofy slapstick’s your bag, give it a go – otherwise it’s one for parents to doze off to behind those nice, dark 3D glasses. Age 3-10, out Aug 1.

Planes: Fire And Rescue (TBC)Though the original Planes lacked the zing of a typical Pixar product, there are enough vehicle-mad small people to mean it grossed well over $200million (€146million) at the box office. And so we get a sequel wherein Dusty (voiced by Dane Cook), a plucky crop-duster turned world champ racer, joins the ‘fire and rescue’ air squad. Age 4+, out Aug 8.

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body matters to advertise, call 01 7055010

[email protected]

Sun’s out, so keep your hat on

SOLAR kERATOSiS Bald men aRe most at Risk

We’ve heard the warnings: wear sun screen, cover up and stay out of the sun at certain

times. And yet skin cancer is now one of the most common cancers in the world.

In Ireland, there were more than 10,000 new cases diagnosed in 2011. The National Cancer Registry of Ireland expects this number to double by 2040.

There are two main types of skin cancer: non-melanoma and malignant melanoma.

Non-melanoma skin cancer is very common and normally highly treatable. It is rare for non-melanoma skin cancers to spread to other parts of the body but, if left untreated, they can sometimes spread to deeper layers of the skin or other organs. Malignant melanoma is less common but more aggressive and can spread to other parts of the body.

Signs of skin cancer include the appearance of a new mole and changes in the size, shape or colour of existing moles, freckles or normal patches of skin. If you notice any of these changes, you should tell your GP – they don’t necessarily mean skin cancer but it’s better to play safe.

The main cause of skin cancer is overexposure to Uv radiation from the sun or sunbeds. This means that in many cases skin cancer can be prevented. The main thing is not to burn; sunburn is a clear sign that the DNA in our skin cells has been damaged by too much Uv radia-tion. Over time, this damage can

build up and lead to skin cancer.‘Research shows the best ways to

avoid sunburn and reduce the risk of skin cancer are to spend time in the shade, especially between 11am and 3pm when the sun is strongest and to cover up with clothing, sunglasses and a hat,’ says Sarah Williams, Cancer Research UK’s senior health information officer.

‘Sunscreen is a great way to cover the other bits, like your face and arms. Choose one with at least SPF 15 and a high star rating and make sure you reapply it regularly, as it’s easily rubbed and sweated off.’

There are many misconceptions about skin cancer, so here’s what you need to know.

MYTH 1 You can’t get sunburnt if it’s cloudy‘Clouds don’t offer much Uv protection on days when the sun is strong,’ says Williams. ‘even in overcast skies, 30 to 40 per cent of Uv will still penetrate through cloud cover. If cloud cover is light or only partial, Uv penetration can remain very high. Check the Uv index for the day to find out how strong the sun’s Uv rays really are, rather than looking at the sky.’

MYTH 2 Spending time in the sun keeps us healthy ‘We all need some sunshine to make vitamin D, which is needed

to build and maintain strong bones,’ says Williams.

‘However, it is not necessary to deliberately sunbathe to make adequate amounts. enjoying the sun safely while taking care not to burn should help most people get a good balance.

‘You should not have to redden or burn your skin to make enough vitamin D. If you think you may have low vitamin D levels, see your doctor.’

MYTH 3 If you’re in the water, you’re protected from harmful effects of the sun ‘You can still get sunburnt if you’re underwater,’ warns Williams.

‘Uv radiation passes through water, so swimming in the sea or open-air pools offer little protection against sunburn.

‘Water can reflect five to 20 per cent of Uv rays, depending on how choppy it is. And even at half a metre depth, Uv rays can be 40 per cent as intense as at the surface.

‘When swimming or snorkelling in the sun, it’s best to wear clothing that covers your arms, back and upper thighs as well as wearing waterproof sunscreen on all your exposed areas.

‘Remember to reapply sunscreen regularly. even sunscreens labelled “water resistant” can be washed off, or rubbed off by towel-drying.’

For more sun safety information visit www.cancer.ie

WHicH iS bEST fOR yOu?There are two types of rays we need protection from: ultraviolet A (UVA) and ultraviolet B (UVB). UVA rays are longwave. They don’t burn but they can penetrate skin deeper and even go through glass. They can lead to wrinkles and contribute to some skin cancers. UVBs are shortwave rays that cause sunburn and have strong links to malignant melanoma.

So how do you choose aproduct that’s right for you?‘SPF ratings range from 0 to 50+,’ says Clare O’Connor, Boots suncare expert. ‘Thehigher the SPF, the more protection it can give againstthe sun’s burning UVB rays.The UVA rating, or star rating,relates to protection againstthe sun’s UVA rays. Three starsoffers 60 per cent UVAprotection, four stars 80 percent and five stars more than90 per cent.’

Applying suncream correctlywill ensure you benefit fromthe full UV protection. ‘Therecommended amount is two milligrams of product forevery square centimetre ofskin – that equates to anamount the size of a £2 coin to cover the whole of one arm and hand,’ says O’Connor. ‘Areas such as your neck, hands and lips need UV protection too but can often get overlooked.’

despite the warnings, skin cancer is more prevalent than ever. Vicki-Marie Cossar busts some sunbathing myths

Non-melanoma skin cancer isNon-melanoma skin cancer is

and can spread to other aggressive and can spread to other

‘solar keratosis is the most commonskin condition resulting from skindamage by the sun over many years,’ says Paul Johnson,spokesman for the RoyalPharmaceutical society. ‘thecondition can affect any exposedpart of the body but top of the listare bald heads – a part of the bodythat can receive a lot of sunexposure but which is oftenneglected when it comes to usingsun protection. men far outnumberwomen with the condition, withone in three having the condition by the age of 70.’

solar keratosis are pink, red orbrown patches on the skin that canform crusts, which, if left untreated,can turn into skin cancer. Johnsonsays those who work outside orhave spent long periods in hotcountries are at increased risk, so should apply high-factor suncreams (sPF 50 or above) everycouple of hours and keep theirheads covered with a hat when thesun is at its strongest. ‘somepharmacies sell special sun productsdesigned for use on the scalp that are less greasy than traditionallotions,’ says Johnson.

Burning issue: Skin cancer rates are five times higher than 40 years ago. Inset, Sarah WilliamsBurning issue: Skin cancer rates are five times higher than 40 years ago. Inset, Sarah WilliamsBurning issue: Skin cancer rates are five times higher than 40 years ago. Inset, Sarah Williams


The bliss of spending two weeks on a far-off beach with only the lapping of the sea for company will be the dream of many this

summer. But the dream comes at a price and that price is jet lag.

‘No matter how advanced air travel gets, no one has yet come up with a way to make jet lag less painful,’ says Geeta Sidhu-Robb, founder of award-winning nutrition-ists Nosh Detox (noshdetox.com).

‘And jet lag isn’t just about extreme tiredness. There are lots of other physical effects that come with it. I get off an aeroplane and my skin is dry, lines suddenly appear where there were none before and my digestion really suffers. In fact, it just packs up.’

So what can be done? ‘Start by eating only raw food on the flight out,’ says Sidhu-Robb. ‘Your body retains more water and suffers less from dehydration if you pack it with live, raw nutrients.’ In place of highly processed airline meals, which can also be high in calories, Sidhu-Robb suggests chopped fruit and vegetables – especially raw greens – vegetarian sushi and unroasted nuts.

Vitamin C is important, too. ‘It helps to regulate cortisol and prevent blood pressure from spiking in response to stressful situations,’ says Sidhu-Robb. ‘elevated levels of cortisol suppress the normal

functioning of the digestive and reproductive systems and growth processes. Top up on lots of vitamin C before, during and the day after your flight.

‘Go for green superfoods such as spirulina, chlorella and seagreens, and fruits such as strawberries, oranges and kiwis,’ she says. ‘Salads with kale, broccoli and bell peppers also have a high vitamin C content.’

Aim to take your own snack for short flights, or a small meal for flights of four hours or longer.

But is booze allowed? Sidhu-Robb says if you must toast your holiday, make it white wine or vodka and have no more than a glass or two.

‘Alcohol contains congeners, which dark colours have more of,’ she says. ‘These are impurities in the alcohol and make your already overloaded body have to work five times harder. Alcohol is a diurectic. You are already dehydrated on a flight, so drinking makes it worse.’

Which leads us to water: drink plenty of it, basically. ‘But don’t gulp, sip. When you gulp water it flushes straight through the body. Sip around 200ml of water for every hour of flying.’

Finally, Sidhu-Robb swears by probiotics. ‘Flying makes you bloated because you are seated for so long, which creates pressure in your abdomen, interferes with digestion and slows everything down.

‘Taking probiotics, which consist of helpful bacteria or yeasts, helps your digestion work again. Take one the day before you fly, the day of the flight and a couple of days after that.’

Long-haul flights can leaveyou feeling unwell, unlessyou heed this advice

How do you beat jet lag?


puzzlesNEMI by Lise

METROKU Easy, Moderate and Challenging. For solutions, visit Metro.co.uk/metroku

Crossword No. 1008 See next edition for solutions

QU

ICK

CRO

ssw

ORd

SCR

IBBL

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Yesterday’s solutionsAcross: 7 Force; 8 Adipose; 9 Example; 10 Limit; 12 Dissidence; 15

Astrologer; 18 Extra; 19 Fitness; 21 Protein; 22 Place. down: 1 Effeminate; 2 Great; 3 Help; 4 Wagers; 5 Dislodge; 6 Comment; 11 Trespasser; 13

Isolated; 14 Station; 16 Offend; 17 Regal; 20 Type.

ACROSS 1 Platform (4) 8 Victorious (10) 9 Finished (8) 10 Sleigh (4) 12 Ready (6) 14 Show (6) 15 Still (6) 17 Threefold (6) 18 Sour (4) 19 Attend (8) 21 Abusive (10) 22 Frank (4)

DOWN 2 Dictatorial (10) 3 Cease (4) 4 Noiseless (6) 5 Hinder (6) 6 Punish (8) 7 Boss (4) 11 Great merit (10) 13 Bullfighters (8) 16 Perpetrate (6) 17 Ligament (6) 18 Too (4) 20 Mediocre (2-2)

PEARLs BEFORE swINE

Astrology calls cost 1.27 euros per min from a BT landline. Live Services cost 2.40 euros per minute. Calls from mobiles/other networksmay cost more. Callers must be 18 or over to use this service and have the bill payers permission. For entertainment purposes only. Allcalls are recorded. PhonePayPlus regulated(ComReg in ROI) UK SP: StreamLive Ltd, NR7 0HR, 08700 234 567. ROI SP:Moveda, 1Courtyard Business Park, Orchard Lane, Blackrock, Co Dublin, 0818 241 398

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METROSCOPEby Patrick Arundell

ENIGMAGourmets only like to go/To restaurants with these on show/They promise all your tum requires/(But do they add to folks’ spare tyres?)

WHO AM I?A male tennis player, I was born in Adelaide in 1981. My first Grand Slam tournament win was the 2001 US Open and I went on to win Wimbledon in 2002.

WHO, WHAT, WHERE & WHEN?WHO… was born Lucille LeSueur before finding fame in the movies?WHAT... were the targets of the Combination Laws of 1799 and 1800?WHERE... in Africa is Libreville the capital?WHEN... was the Battle of Waterloo fought?

QUIZ ANSWERS: ENIGMA: Michelin stars. WHO AM I? Lleyton Hewitt. WHO, WHAT, WHERE & WHEN? Joan Crawford; Trade Unions; Gabon; June 18, 1815.

Aries Mar 21 – Apr 20Something could take on giant proportions today so if you findyourself worrying about an issue that would not normally exercise you,that’s a prime clue. If so, try to checkthis tendency. At the same time, youcan tune into inner untapped talents.For your forecast, call 15609 114 70

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sagittarius Nov 23 – Dec 21The Moon in your sign will briefly square Neptune today. Thiscombination could see you doubtyourself, partly because somethingmay seem confusing. However, thisprobably won’t last and, in fact, youcan gain from deciphering thissituation.For your forecast, call 15609 114 78

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Rosberg in German credentials jibeAuTO Nico Rosberg has said he is ‘100 per cent German’ in the wake of Lewis Hamilton’s latest playful dig at his Mercedes team-mate’s upbringing.Following his superb British Grand Prix triumph on Sunday, Hamilton was asked how valuable it would be to win Rosberg’s home race in Germany on July 20. Hamilton replied with a grin: ‘Nico has never actually been in Germany, so it’s not really his home race.’ Hamilton then told a tale of their karting days when Rosberg used to stand by a flag of Monaco where he was raised after being born in Germany. Rosberg said: ‘I didn’t grow up [there], but I consider myself 100 per cent German.’ He would love to follow Michael Schumacher and Sebastian Vettel and win in front of his home fans.

Going ‘all out’ to impress McGinleygOLf Former Open champion Paul Lawrie knows he may have to lift the Claret Jug again next week to have any chance of making the Ryder Cup team, but would be willing to do anything to help European captain Paul McGinley. Lawrie is currently a lowly 80th on the European points list. Ahead of the Scottish Open, Lawrie said: ‘Paul’s made it very clear he would like me to play on the team. We’ll wait and see if he makes the call and asks me to do it. It’ll take a hell of an effort now to get in. I would need to win this week or next week, so I’ll be going all out still’.

Froch defeat did not deter GrovesbOxing George Groves is back on the super middleweight championship trail and insists his next fight is bigger than his double-header against British rival Carl Froch. The 26-year-old lost twice to Froch in IBF and WBA title fights, but a bout against European super middleweight champion Christopher Rebrasse on September 20 offers Groves the chance to get back to winning ways. In May, Froch stopped Groves in round eight, the second time in six months the champion had successfully defended his titles. But Groves is undeterred. ‘There are no doubts in my mind that I will become a world champion, I just haven’t had it my way enough so far,’ he said. ‘Win this fight and I am back in the picture.’

spORT DigEsT

12 year partnership between Manchester United and kit supplier Nike will end after the coming season as the sports-wear firm failed to accept terms for an extension

cycling tour de france

Kittel brings winningways to french stages

fROOME LOsEs gROunD On LEADERs As EARLy TuMbLE LEADs TO injuRED wRisT

Marcel Kittel won a third tour de France stage in four at-tempts and chris Froome suffered a crash as the 101st edition of the race resumed in northern France on tuesday.

there was drama early on the 163.5km stage from le touquet-Paris-Plage to lille as defending champion Froome went down after six kilometres.

the finish produced a familiar winner as Kittel (Giant-Shimano) out-sprinted alexander Kristoff (Katusha) and arnaud Demare (FDJ) to add to his wins in Harro-gate and london.

Vincenzo Nibali (astana) was 24th to retain the race leader’s yel-low jersey.

Froome finished 42nd on the stage, slipping from fifth to seventh overall ahead of a challenging fifth stage which will commemorate 100 years since the start of World War One.

andy Schleck, the 2010 winner, did not start due to a knee injury suf-fered in a crash on stage three from cambridge to london on Monday, when Kittel won.

another sprint stage was expected in lille, but that did not put off an early two-man breakaway.

thomas Voeckler (europcar) and luis Mate (cofidis) established an advantage of more than three min-utes after escaping in the first kilo-metres, but their lead was cut to 30 seconds with 60km to go.

crosswinds had split the peloton after the surge for the intermediate

sprint, but all the main protagonists were safely in the front group.

Mate punctured before being gob-bled up by the peloton as Voeckler forged on alone, taking his lead over one minute once more.

andre Greipel suffered a blow with 30km to go as three of his team-mates crashed, lars Bak, Bart De clercq and leadout man Greg Henderson.

Bak and De clercq rejoined the peloton, but New Zealander Hend-erson abandoned with a knee inju-ry.

Voeckler was swallowed up by the peloton with 17km to go and the sprinters’ teams tried to take control in a technical finish.

Omega Pharma-QuickStep took control for much of the final 5km, but Giant-Shimano took over inside the final 2km.

Kristoff was first to launch his sprint, but despite appearing more laboured than on the Mall 24 hours earlier, Kittel triumphed once more.

Mobile doctor:Defendingchampion Froomegets medicalassistance fromhis team after crashing duringthe 163.5 kmfourth stage ofthe Tour de France race from Le Touquet-Paris-Plage to Lille

Stinger: Froome’s badly grazed hip

Chris Froome was sent for a precautionary X-ray on his wrist at the end of a fourth stage crash of the Tour de France which began with the defending champion tumbling to the tarmac yesterday.

The 163.5-kilometres stage from Le Touquet-Paris-Plage to Lille began with drama as Froome crashed.

After negotiating three British stages unscathed, he tumbled 6km into French soil, tearing his shorts, suffering grazes to the left side he hurt in June’s Criterium du Dauphine and damaging his wrist.

Froome visited the race doctor and required a splint on his wrist to finish the stage, and afterwards he was sent to hospital for a scan.

Team sky principal sir Dave Brailsford said on teamsky.com: ‘Chris felt fine in the final and felt good physically. We’re going to send him for a precautionary X-ray just to check his wrist. We know these things happen. it’s part and parcel of bike racing.’

Froome’s joints will face a major test on today’s fifth stage, the 155.5km route from Ypres to Arenberg Porte du hinaut, which features cobbled sections totalling more than 15km.

Froome’s team-mate Bernhard eisel said: ‘This wave went through the whole bunch, from ten to the last position.

‘it’s just a big wave and Froomey was like the third rider and with the wave he had no chance. he just went down.

‘he has a cast on his hand, but he feels okay and hopefully we just lost some skin. We didn’t lose time. Let’s hope for the best.’

Froome may not have lost time, but he dropped back from fifth to seventh in the overall rankings, behind Alberto Contador (Tinkoff-saxo) and Alejandro Valverde (movistar).

Froome finished 42nd on the stage won by marcel Kittel, while Vincenzo Nibali (Astana) was 24th to retain the race leader’s yellow jersey.

Three bien: Marcel Kittel celebrates after winning his third Tour stage

by MARK DARcy


ODDbALLsban takes a chunk out of suarez’s earnings

Fan’s fist of fury sees him land television awardA BrAzil fan who became aninternet hit after accidentally breaking his television has beengiven a new one by World Cupsponsors. rafael Gambarim got soexcited after goalkeeper JulioCesar, left, saved a spot- kick in thepenalty shootout during Brazil’slast-16 clash with Chile, he put hisfists though the screen. Film of theincident saw Gambarim becomesomething of a star in hishomeland and prompted sponsorsSamsung to present him with ashiny new set.

wORLD cup

By gum:Suareznever gotthe chance to cash in

FLAsHbAck

MilliONS of viewers will never forget the sheer colour of the 1978 World Cup final in Buenos Aires – ticker tape and all, writes Nick Metcalfe. Hosts Argentina were desperate to win football’s greatest prize for the first time, while opponents Holland were keen to put their 1974 final defeat to West Germany behind them. On a tumultuous night, Mario Kempes gave Argentina a first-half lead,

super Mario’s double sparks buenos Aires celebrations

Home hero: Kempes

brazil 2014

before Dick Nanninga equalised with eight minutes remaining. Then came the moment that still haunts Dutch football fans, with rob rensenbrink dramatically striking a post in stoppage time. Holland’s best chance was gone, with Argentina taking full advantage of their let-off in extra-time. Another goal from Kempes, and a late third from Daniel Bertoni, sealed a memorable 3-1 win for Argentina and set up the mother of all Buenos Aires parties.

Anxious Holland left sweating by Van persie’s bug

HOLLAND’S hopes of reaching a second successive World Cup final could be dealt a major blow with Robin van Persie struggling to make today’s game against Argentina.

A stomach upset forced the Man-chester United striker mainly to train separately from the rest of his team-mates yesterday as they prepared for the semi-final in Sao Paulo.

Asked whether he thought Van Persie would recover in time, Dutch boss Louis Van Gaal said: ‘He has a stomach problem, an intestinal prob-lem – I don’t know.’

Van Persie has scored three goals in the tournament so far and his fu-ture Manchester United manager is prepared to wait until the last minute before deciding if he can play.

‘Van Persie is our captain so he is very important to us,’ said Van Gaal.

‘In principle my captain always plays – but he has to be fit.’

Holland have relied heavily so far on Van Persie and fellow attacker Arjen Robben, who both scored in the penalty shoot-out win over Costa Rica in the quarter-finals.

It was a draining match but Van Gaal expects his players to be fresh to face Alejandro Sabella’s team.

‘In general I give the players two

days to recover, so if you have one day less it’s an issue, a problem,’ he said. ‘But a top athlete can perform, so my players will be in shape.’

Van Gaal also scoffed at Argenti-na’s status as bookies’ favourites.

‘I don’t think there is a favourite,’ he insisted. ‘The countries are at the same level. It’s a 50-50 match and we have to be a bit lucky too.’

Key to Holland’s chances of reach-

ing their fourth final will be how they deal with the threat of Argenti-na’s main man Lionel Messi.

‘He has been voted the world’s best player before and you don’t get that for nothing,’ Van Gaal said. ‘He has always found it hard to show his form at international level.

‘He wants to do it at this tourna-ment and we want to stop him. That will be a challenge.’

by JOHN pAYNE

‘In principle he plays, but he has to be fit’

picture: afppicture: afppicture: afp

Feeling groggy:Dutch captain Van

Persie trainingyesterday

LuIS Suarez may have had acheeky surprise for viewers hadhe not been handed a four-monthban for biting Italy’s GiorgioChiellini. according to bookmakerPaddy Power, had the Liverpoolstriker been allowed to play inuruguay’s last-16 clash withColombia he could have picked

up a cool €1million just for flashinga smile at TV cameras whilewearing a mouth guard branded with the company’s logo. The bookies say they were close to doing a similar dealwith Suarez last summerafter he returned to actionfollowing an eight-game ban

for biting Chelsea’s BranislavIvanovic. But despite claiming thestriker was ‘up for it’, thenegotiations then ‘broke downover cost’.a spokesman for Paddy Powersaid: ‘In principle we had a deal inplace whereby Suarez would reveal a Paddy Power mouth guard during the national anthemsbefore the Colombia match.‘unfortunately Fifa had other ideasand the deal fell apart.’


TRAnsfER TALk

kEY BATTLE: Arjen Robben v Lionel Messi

semi-final briefing: semi-final briefing: semi-final briefing: Holland v Argentina

sao Paulo, 9pm, RTÉ

POssiBLETEAMsArgentina: Romero, Rojo, Garay, Demichelis, Zabaleta, Mascherano, Biglia, Aguero, Perez, Higuain, Messi. Holland: Cillesen, Vlaar, De Vrij, Martins Indi, Blind, Sneijder, Kuyt, Wijnaldum, Lens, Robben, Van Persie.Robben, Van Persie.Robben, Van Persie.

brazil 2014

to make this dream a reality. To play a World Cup final with the great atmosphere of the Maracana is something every player dreams of, but first we have to get there.’

Coach Alejandro Sabella called his talisman ‘our water in the desert’ after the 1-0 quarter-final win over

Belgium, but the man with four of Argentina’s eight goals in Brazil be-lieves it is a team effort.

‘I’d prefer the World Cup than the golden boot. Always,’ he added. ‘I am only concentrating on the team. It’s a great honour to be captain and I want to pay back the trust by lead-ing Argentina to the World Cup.’

Messi living the dreamLIoneL MeSSI insists winning the World Cup with Argentina would mean more to him than all the honours in his glittering career.

Argentina will reach their first World Cup final in 24 years if they beat Holland at the Arena Corinthi-ans in Sao Paulo tonight.

As well as winning the Ballon d’or three times, Messi has won three Champions Leagues and six Spanish titles with Barcelona but that would all pale in comparison should they go on to win in Rio on Sunday.

‘As a player, winning a World Cup is the best there is,’ the Argentina captain said. ‘It’s something you dream about when you are a kid and it never disappears.’

Messi has asked club-mates Xavi, Andres Iniesta and Gerard Pique how it felt to lift the trophy for Spain in South Africa four years ago.

‘They couldn’t explain,’ added the 27-year-old. ‘We will do everything

by JOHn PAYnE

‘It’s something you dream of as a kid’

The bosses: Louis van Gaal v Alex sabellaLVG’S tactical flexibility has made fools of those who wrote the Dutch off pre-tournament. The Manchester United boss (right), 62, is not afraid to make drastic changes if ‘Plan A’ is not succeeding and bringing goalkeeper Tim Krul on for the shoot-out win over Costa Rica was as inspired as it was crazy. Sabella was a cult hero as a player at Sheffield United, so Blades supporters will join Albicelestes fans in hoping the 59-year-old can lead his country to their first World Cup final since 1990 when they lost to Germany. The pressure is also upped on Sabella because today is Argentina’s Independence Day.

4 World Cup meetings – there have been two wins for Holland, one for Argen-tina (‘78 final) and a draw

TWo World Cup juggernauts TWo World Cup juggernauts TWo World Cup juggernauts go head to head in tonight’s go head to head in tonight’s go head to head in tonight’s semi-final in Sao Paulo as the superstars from Barcelona and superstars from Barcelona and superstars from Barcelona and Bayern Munich attempt to Bayern Munich attempt to Bayern Munich attempt to carry their teams into Sunday’s carry their teams into Sunday’s carry their teams into Sunday’s final. The pressure on Messi final. The pressure on Messi final. The pressure on Messi and Robben (pictured) is immense as both Argentina and Holland need their and Holland need their and Holland need their prize assets to be prize assets to be prize assets to be firing on all firing on all firing on all cylinders if they are to triumph. triumph. triumph. Messi started Messi started Messi started the World the World the World Cup with a barrage of barrage of barrage of goals, scoring goals, scoring goals, scoring four times in the four times in the four times in the three group matches, three group matches, three group matches, and although he has not and although he has not and although he has not found the net in the found the net in the found the net in the knockout stages, his knockout stages, his knockout stages, his unselfish pass to Angel di unselfish pass to Angel di unselfish pass to Angel di

Maria which led to victory in the closing moments against

Switzerland was outstanding.

Robben has also failed to get on the scoresheet since a flurry of goals in the first two games of the Dutch campaign and has courted

controversy with accusations of diving

in the penalty area. But there is no doubting his

ability when he’s in full flow. There’s no way Holland would have reached the last four without his potent attacking threat.

Surprisingly, two-time champions Argentina are playing their first World Cup semi-final since they beat hosts

Italy in 1990

did you know?

main

PiCTURE: g

ETTy

Leadingfrom thefront:Messi

PiCTURE: gETTy

Ross worth the dosh, says felixFULHAM have signed striker Ross McCormack from Leeds for a fee reported to be the highest for a player in the second tier. Championship newcomers Fulham did not disclose the amount but it is believed the Cottagers coughed up £11million for the 27-year-old Scotland international, who netted 28 league goals last term for United. Fulham manager Felix Magath said: ‘Ross was not only the top scorer in the Championship last season but also made a lot of assists, so has a proven pedigree at this level.’

u fRee agent Gareth Barry, 33, last night signed for everton on a three-year contract.u WeST Ham have confirmed thesigning of teenage midfielder DiegoPoyet. The 19-year-old joins on afour-year deal following the expiry of his contract at Charlton. TheHammers have reportedly alsomade a £12million move for long-time Liverpool target YevhenKonoplyanka.u CHeLSeA are believed to havemade an improved offer of £15mfor Atletico Madrid’s filipe Luis asthey look to replace Ashley Cole,following his move to Roma. TheBlues had a £12m bid rejected by the Spanish champions last week, with reports suggesting he may have to pay off the remainder ofhis £19m buy-out clause at Atletico.u DUSAN TADIC has signed a four-year deal at Southampton. Theformer FC Twente midfielder, who isseen as a replacement for AdamLallana, is new boss Ronald Koeman’s first signing.u BuRnLey defender Luke o’neill has signed a new two-year deal at Turf Moor.

MANCHeSTeR City have signed goalkeeper Willy Caballero from Malaga on a three-year contract. The 32-year-old Argentinian has moved for an undisclosed fee in a switch that sees him reunited with City boss Manuel Pellegrini. The pair worked together at Malaga after Pellegrini signed Caballero for the Spanish outfit in 2011. League champions City have been looking for a new goalkeeper to provide competition for england No.1 Joe Hart following Costel Pantilimon’s release at the end of last season. Caballero (right) is City’s third new signing of the summer, with midfielder Fernando and full-back Bacary Sagna the other arrivals. ‘I am very happy, and really looking forward to the start of pre-season and performing well to help the team,’ Caballero said. ‘This is a new challenge and a new league for me.’

i want to be City’s no.1, admits Willy

Scholes excited about Van Gaal’s ‘magic touch’PAuL Scholes believes Louis vanGaal has a magic touch that canimprove Manchester united by‘20-25 per cent’.

The former united midfielder, is excited about the prospect ofVan Gaal taking over asmanager at old Trafford aheadof the new season.

Van Gaal will take up dutieswith united after the World Cupin Brazil, where he has takenHolland to the semi-finals.

Scholes wrote in a blog: ‘Right now, Manchester united fans(and myself) cannot wait forLouis van Gaal to get the jobstarted at old Trafford. Van Gaalseems to have the Midas touch,and with his coachingreputation and vast experience he can bring a lot to the club. He’ll improve last year’s performance by 20-25 per cent, Ifeel.’

one of Van Gaal’s mostremarkable tactical decisions at the World Cup came when hereplaced goalkeeper JasperCillessen with Tim Krul deepinto injury time in Holland’s quarter-final against Costa Rica.Krul rewarded him by producingtwo saves in the subsequent penalty shootout to send theDutch into the last four.

Scholes: Welcoming Van Gaal


SPORT Froome falls foul of French roads as Kittel takes stage

see page 21«

sEMi-finALbrazil............1germany......7

sambabeat...

quickly forgotten as Thomas Muller started the rout in the 11th minute, side-footing home a corner.

Miroslav Klose became the highest World Cup scorer ever (16) when he finished off an incisive move at the second attempt in the 23rd minute.

Toni Kroos smashed in from the edge of the area a minute later, and tapped in for 4-0 in the 26th minute.

By now, the TV cameras were cut-ting to sobbing fans in the crowd but

their horror continued as Khedira swept home a fifth. Substitute Andre Schurrle piled on the goals with strikes in the 69th and 79th minutes.

Oscar’s last-minute goal was aca-demic as Joachim Low’s side strutted into Sunday’s final with a cold-blood-ed authority that will have Argentina or Holland seriously worried.

GerMAny stormed into a record eighth World Cup final with farcical ease as Brazil’s tag as tournament fa-vourites was exposed as a nonsense.

After their unconvincing displays en route, Brazil’s elimination was not a shock but no one could have fore-seen this annihilation – the biggest ever in a World Cup semi-final.

It was a surreal exit for the hosts, who were 5-0 down after 29 minutes, with their shambolic back four of David Luiz, Maicon, Marcelo and Dante – who replaced the suspended Thiago Silva – particularly culpable.

Stand-in captain Luiz clutched a jersey bearing the name of injured talisman neymar during their anthem but the morale-boosting exercise was

5 Goals for Muller to movehim second behind GoldenBoot leader James Rodriguez

Brazil crash out of world cup after record annihilation athands of rampant Germans

Rout of this world: Fernandinho of Brazil reacts after a goal scored by Toni Kroosreacts after a goal

Das booted: Germany players celebrate making the World Cup finals

by Richard Rooney

Metro Herald, Wednesday, July 9, 2014

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Transcript of Metro Herald, Wednesday, July 9, 2014