Men’s rights conference final

Save Family Foundation 1

MEN’S RIGHTS CONFERENCE

Indian Law InstituteNew Delhi

August 4, 2013

Save Family Foundation


Contents

• Frequently Asked Questions• Success Stories• Men’s Rights Movement• Lobbying with MPs• Challenges


Frequently Asked Questions !!!(FAQs)

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DISCLAIMER

• We are NOT legal experts• The views expressed are entirely based on

experiences• Any decision that you take for your cases will

be entirely your responsibility• None of the solutions is “Guaranteed”

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• Before Joining SIF• Common Myths• Frequently Asked Questions

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FAQs - Agenda


Before Joining SIF

• Scared• Depressed• Helpless• Socially Cutoff/No One to share• Victimized

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Common Myths

• I have not taken any dowry, nothing can happen to me• I’ll be arrested as soon as cases are filed• My case is false, but other’s cases might be true• Dowry cases can’t be filed after 7 yrs of marriage• I have hired a “good” lawyer, so I am in safe hands

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Frequently Asked Questions

Q: I am a new to SIF, how can SIF help me?• We don’t give you fish to eat, We teach you how to fish!!• You have to help yourself !!• SIF gives you a platform to learn, at the worst possible crisis of your life

Q: What does SIF Expect in return?• We expect people to contribute to the movement• Be an activist, Help others

Q: I do not have a SIF chapter in my town, What should I do?• Start a chapter

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Q: Why are Men’s right Organizations like SIF not so effective/well known ?• Priorities: Can travel 2000km for case, but don’t travel 20 Km

for cause• Men don’t support men• Lack of Vision: Focus on Cases (not Law)• Men Don't Spend time/bandwidth in fighting the “Laws”• Men are too Shy• Common man think that there are ZERO % chances of divorce

in his lifetime

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Q: What precautions should be taken at the time of marriage of son/daughter ?• Do Not marry in a 498A family• Do Not marry in the family where people are involved in

illegal/fraudulant activities• Make sure that the list of Gifts (“stridhan”) is signed by the

couple along with 2 witnesses from each side. This should be video graphed

• Marriage certificate should say that NO dowry was given or taken during the marriage

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Q: My wife is staying with me and threatening me for false cases, What should I do?• Start recording (Video/Audio) all her nonsense• Try if you can stay alone with your wife; away from your parents/family• Keep a track of all the expenses that you are doing on her• Keep all important documents/valuables away from her• Keep a proof of her educational Qualifications, Job , Salary etc• Keep relatives/neighbour informed• Focus on Knowledge/don’t be a victim

At the time she leaves:• Inform the police as soon as she leaves the house• Take a receipt of the things that she is carrying with her; get it signed by witnesses• Try to keep the kids (if possible)

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Q: My Case is in CAW cell, What to do?• Do not settle cases in CAW• Return her items ASAP• Never Loose temper with IO• Apply for AB • Don’t get extorted for AB, Fight till SC• Watch the SFF Commando training Video (@youtube)• In case she wants to return, ask her to:

– Give on a affidavit that the complaint is false– No Dowry was given/demanded or during/after marriage– Publish the same in Newspaper– Ask her to say sorry to your parents, in CAW (Video record)

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Q: My wife is NOT staying with me but threatening me for false cases, What should I do?• Start recording all phone calls with her (family)• Keep a record of your presence (especially on

weekends/holidays)• Do not close channels of communications• Keep a tab on FIR • No Anticipatory Bail in UP, Uttrakhand

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Q:Can my parents/married sister be implicated in the case, even if they are staying separately?

• It is a very common practice to implicate Sisters, Parents and other family members

• This is done to create the pressure on husbands and create a panic situation

• Suggestion: Apply separate bail for family members

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Q: What all Cases can be filed on me?• IPC 498A (Dowry Harassment)• IPC 406 (Criminal Breach Of Trust)• IPC 323 (voluntarily causing hurt)• IPC 504 (Intentional insult with intent to provoke)• IPC 506 (Punishment for criminal intimidation)• IPC 511 (attempting to commit offences punishable with imprisonment for

life)• *IPC 307 (Attempt to Murder)• CrPC 125 (Maintenance)• PWDV 2005 (Prevention of Women against DV, 2005)

* Common in UP, Bihar, Rajasthan

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Q: Shall I file a divorce/RCR on my own?

• Filing Divorce/RCR is a waste of Time/Energy/Money• We do not advise to file a divorce /RCR• There is nothing called “contested divorce” for Indian

husbands• If u have sufficient evidences/witness look for opportunities

to file Criminal cases• Have patience, and wait for the opposite party to come to

your terms for Mutual divorce

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Q: My Wife has filed a transfer petition in HC/SC on my RCR/Divorce case? What should I do ?• Hire a lawyer in HC/SC and file a reply• Ask for a time bound disposal of case• Defend it, but don’t expect anything• Focus on the places where Opposite party has hidden facts

from court and have come with “Unclean Hands”

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Q: Multiple maintenance cases have been filed on me, What should I do ?• She will get maintenance under one only, but you will have to

fight all of them• Keep proofs of her Educational Qualifications, Job etc.• Focus on your liabilities and responsibilities• File written arguments, Use Citations• Get rid of your assets in a planned manner• Do NOT leave the Job• Increase your Income, not your salary

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Q: I have a house on my name, can wife claim right on that house ? Can she claim residence in my parental house?

• Yes, She can claim the right to stay in your house• She can claim the RTR or alternate arrangements in

Matrimonial home• If IrBM is passed, she can claim 50% property (Under Process)

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Q: My wife is demanding XX lacs to settle the cases, shall I go ahead ?

• We don’t recommend to settle cases by paying money• It has its own repercussions

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Q:My wife has filed cases/complaints on me (in past) and now she wants to come back?

• We do NOT recommend to such wife back, in fact we recommend to Boycott such families/girls

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Q: Will getting disowned from my parents help me or them?

• NO, it does’t means that your parents haven’t tortured• Generally, allegations are for time before disownment

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Q: Every thing is against men, what can I do ?• RTI (Right to Information)• TEP (Tax Evasion Petition)• Write to Sr. citizen commission/NCW• Meet/Write to MP/MLA/PMO/LM• Meet Sr. Police Officers and create pressure for fair Investigation• Boycott 498A families/girls• Attend Weekly Meetings• Be a commando • Have Patience, Look for opportunities to file counter cases

* Use Hindi especially in UP, MP, Rajasthan, Bihar etc.

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Success Stories

Welcome to the wonderful world of Success stories

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Anticipatory Bail and TEP

• Name: Sanjay Sachdeva• Achievement: Anticipatory bail without any condition• No upfront money or maintenance• Heavy penalty imposed on FIL through income tax

petition

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Counter case

• Name: Pankaj Kumar• Achievement: Registration of FIR against wife

under section IPC 420/524 for the fake bills submitted by complainant in support of her Istridhan list

• RTI and follow-up with sales tax • FIR through CrPc 156(3)


Dismiss of DV case

• Name: Swarup Sarkar• Achievement: Dismissal of Domestic Violence case• Prima Face No Evidence of Domestic Violence• Key factor: Small two line hand written paper by Wife

that she left her Home own will.• Hide fact in court & Unclean Hand to Mislead court



Maintenance from Wife

• Name: Yogesh Verma• Achievement: Maintenance fixed from Wife to

Husband• FIR registered against wife u/s 420,506 and

charge sheet submitted• Charges framed and case is in trail

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No Maintenance to wife

• Name: Wasif Ali• Achievement: No maintenance in CrPc 125• Complainant filled the case from Pune to harass

while she was residing at Delhi• Fought on ground of jurisdiction and won• Key Success Factor: Employment proof through RTI

from Private School


Regular bail through SIF networking

• Name: Amit Lakhani• Achievement: Granted regular bail without Judicial

custody• Husband arrested from Delhi and taken to Indore• Whole networking of SIF PAN India level was used

and he got bail as he reached Indore


Most Important

RTI

• Name: Sandeep Marwah• Achievement: Heavy penalty imposed on FIL from

Sales tax and service tax through RTI• FIR registered against FIL U/S 420/468/471


Discharge in IPC 406

• Name: Pankaj Kataria-Faridabad• Achievement: Discharge in 406 through Party

in person



Child Visitation

• Name: Vijay Naru• Achievement: Regular continuous visitation of two children• Celebrating his B'day and children b’day together from last

few years• 3-5 days visitation per week in summer and winter vacations• Visitation during festivals like-Diwali, Dusshera etc

• winter vacation

• Diwali

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Dowry prohibition act

• Name: Manish Mittal• Achievement: Registration of case under dowry

prohibition act against in-laws

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Acquittal in 304B

• Name: Sunichay Sarkaar• Achievement: Acquittal in 304B

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Tools

Right to Information Act, 2005

Tax Evasion Petition

Guidance through yahoo group

Networking with like minded people

Weekly meetings

Help documents available on SIF yahoo group 498A – Survival Guide

How to Handle CAW cell

All about Tax Evasion Petition

Judgments repository

Warning for Indian bachelor

Circulars and RTI templates

Internet blogs of seniors



General Information

• All references are from the victims residing in NCR and shown just as an example. There are many other similar cases as success stories from across the country.

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Men’s Rights Movement


Indian Laws - Current Situation


No One to Listen !!


Legal Terrorism !!


Men Suicide – A Serious Concern


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20000

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62433

2566 554 2379

10756

32852

2354 729 1325

MEN

WOMEN

• Suicides of married men has skyrocketed in the past 13 years• Almost twice the number of married men commit suicide

Source: NCRB

Men Are Dying Faster Than Women….

Save Family Foundation 441995 1996 1997 1998 1999 2000 2001 2002 2003 2004 2005 2006 2007 2008 2009 2010 2011

0

10000

20000

30000

40000

50000

60000

70000

35245

32867

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41143

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46000

47000

48409

49545

51623

52483

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57593

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26076

28562

30000

28000

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26936

27603

28045

28188

29869

30064

30224

31300

31754

32582

Suicide when married (past 15 years) Husband Suicides Wife Suicides

Years

Married Men Are Dying Even Faster….


Hard Reality of 21st century Women

• She wants all your property in her name. Her father and brothers won’t give it to her, so she will take it from you.

• Wants all your salary and income in her account. Her father and brothers never used to give her enough money for her expenses.

• Wants you to throw your parents out of your home immediately after marriage. You better do it or she has a law to support her in throwing you and your parents out.

• Anything you say to her is a torture to her. She can slap you and there is no law for your to safeguard yourself from this domestic violence.

Kill Legal Terrorists Using Legal System

United Nations Report on Elder Abuse In India

Kill Legal Terrorists Using Legal System 46Save Family Foundation


First Things' First: Be happy !!

• STRESS = UNCERTINITY * IMPORTANCE

• MAKE ONE OF THEM ZERO, YOUR STRESS WILL BE ZERO.

IF NOT, use following 3A formula:– ACTION PLAN– ACT– AVOID



ATTITUDE/MIND SET OF COMMANDO

• MUST READ/VIEW THE CHYNAKAYA NITI• ALWAYS LOOK FOR A CHANDRA GUPTA MAURYA

• INDENTIFY THE STRENGHT AND WEEKNESS OF ENEMY• CREATE FEAR IN THE MIND OF ENEMY CAMP

• SHARPEN YOUR WEAPEN• SET THE ACTION BY EXAMPLES THAN ADVICE/INSTRUCT OTHERS

• USE CARPET BOMBING• ALWAYS THINK ABOUT WELLFARE OF MEN

• EMOTION AND LEGAL ISSUE SHOULD NOT BE COMBINED.• LEARN TO DIE AS DEBIT MAN THAN CREDIT MAN.

• FORMATION OF TEAM : LIKE POLITICAL CAMPAIN, MEDIA CAMPAIN, LEGAL CAMPAIN, WEEKLY MEETINGS, DATA BASE, EMAIL CAMPAIN..ETC.

ALLOW THE DIFFERENCE OF OPINION, ACTION PLAN TO EXECUTE IN DIGNIFIED WAY AND SUPPORT THE CAUSE, NOT ANY INDIVIDUAL, TO STOP LEGAL TERRORISM.



TOOLS OF COMMANDO• Blog/Website: Men suicide / Murder / Crime Against Men data

• Mail id of Journalist / media Houses• Address of all MPs / MLAs

• Address and mail id of all related Ministries• All men NGO head contact numbers / mail ids

• Attend weekly meetings• Study all men suffering / news

• Protest for any anti male article / news• Victim story

• Press conference• Meetings / Dharna

• Pamphlet / Poster / mass email activity• Social net working

• Non-Apologetic to any women having issues• Create alternative to men than marriage system

• Create more and more study reports• Establish more and more media through programs / videos on YouTube

• Learn to use multidimensional strategy• Use the Technology

AWARENESS IS KEY TO STOP LEGAL TERRORISM.



WHAT IS OUR DEMAND• ALL LAW / POLICYS SHOULD BE GENDER NETURAL. THE MAN / WOMAN TERM TO

BE REPLACED BY “PERSON” AND HUSBAND / WIFE TO BE REPLACED BY “SPOUSE”.• GIRLS / BOYS SHOULD GET EQUAL SHARE AND RESPONSIBILITY IN PARENTAL

PROPERTY / ASSESTS.• ANY MARRIAGE DISPUTE TO BE RESOLVED THORUGH CIVIL LAW, NO CRIMINAL

LAW SHOULD BE ALLOWED.• ESTABLISH A MEN’s WELFARE MINISTRY.• MISUSE CLAUSE TO BE INSERTED IN ALL SPECIAL LAWS WHICH HAVE JAIL AND FINE

TERMS.• IF WOMEN DO NOT DO CRIME WHY ARE THEY AFRAID TO ACCEPT THE GENDER

NETURAL LAW?

INJUSTICE SOME WHERE IS DIRECT THREAT OF JUSTICE EVERY WHERE.


Three vital action areas


SIF and allied NGOs

Men’s rights awareness in Society

Change Existing laws like 498a / DV STOP New laws from forming

Long term 10-20 yrs


LOBBYING with MPs


What is it ? Activity of attempting to influence decisions made by officials in the government, most often MP’s and Ministers of states.

Lobbying involves more than persuading legislators. Lobbyists research and analyze legislation or regulatory proposals, attend hearings, and educate government officials on important issues. Lobbyists also work to change public opinion through campaigns or by influencing 'opinion leaders'.


Who does it ?

A lobbyist may be anyone, A lobbyist is an activist who seeks to persuade members of the government to enact legislation that would benefit their group. It can be :

• Organized Groups• Individuals• Nonprofit organizations• Others


Why we do it ?

The need of lobbying was felt when political parties /people with inordinate socioeconomic power started corrupting the law (twisting it away from fairness) in order to serve their own conflict of interest.Lobby groups may concentrate their efforts on the legislatures, where laws are created, but may also use the judicial branch to advance their causes. The idea is to influence the thought process of the MP’s/ Political parties so that the concerns are addressed while debating in the parliament


Effects of Lobbying

• Awareness regarding the organization/ strength of group

• Voice of the organization/people is conveyed to the law makers

• Demands of the lobbying group can be negotiated better.

• Chance to represent the group on a political platform


Nominations?• Name• Contact number• Availability days

Note: We do lobbying in evening. Tentative time: 17:00 to timings 21:00


Challenges


Challenges

• Activities (Ground level/Internet)• Political Party• Lobbying with MP/MLA• Research Activity• Fund Generation- Outsource


Challenges - Activities

Dharna and Protest • Headcount – to take to a level of at least 1000• Jail Bharo – People ready to get arrested• Help from Khap/Student Unions/Small Political PartiesPamphlets & Posters• Ready Pamphlets & Posters in MeetingsDatabase • Organized way of handling itLegal Interventions• PILs


Challenges – Political Party

• Political Party formation• 150 addresses, voting card, affidavit• Office address• Full time representative to manage it – min. 25


Challenges – Lobbying with MPs

• Lobbying Team• Identifying and meeting MPs – MPs in favour/against/neutral• Build relationship with them – viz send greeting cards in IMD

etc


Challenges –Research Activities

• We have to come up with plenty of Research Reports and Analysis

• We lack a good research team• Niladri is our Delhi Research Head – he needs a good

research team


Challenges -Fund Generation- Outsource

• SFF/SIF is a non-funded organisation, we don’t charge anything for counseling

• We work on sponsorship and voluntary contribution for activities

• Funds can be generated through– Corporate– Voluntary Donors


Thank You !!!

Men’s rights conference final

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