I’m not a fan of Pinstar’s rules (no offense), so after a little searching I found some that I can work with. KainTheSlayer (at Boolprop.com) offered his/her (?) version, and they seem more ideal for me to work with. Plus (s)he has handicaps that I can follow.

I’ve picked out 7 handicaps that I can do. The first one is where no member of the household (excluding babies, toddlers, guests) can have a bladder failure or pass out. The second is Strict Family Values where there is no protected woohoo, if you know what I mean. The third is Tight Job Market where jobs can only be taken on Monday and they have to be the first job. Four is I’m doing a patriarch. Fifth, all wives must be NPCS. Sixth, all opportunities must be done. My final handicap is every generation must write a novel. Easy, right?

Okay, enough pictures of my Simself at a computer. Let’s meet our founder, shall we? This stud right here is Timmy McCrayonacy. Timmy will name all his offspring after crayon colors. Fun-fun. Timmy is a family-orientated snob who is athletic, never nude, and a kleptomaniac. His favorite color is orange, food is hamburgers, and he likes his music custom. The family traits are snob and family-orientated. He wants to max his athletic and logic skills.

This is his humble abode he’ll start out with. It has the bare necessities he needs. For entertainment, he can paint or play chess. There’s also a random barstool in the middle, because I didn’t know what else to put there. Hehe.

Here’s the outside for those who like to see what the outside of the house looks like.

“And honestly, you aren’t living, bro, if you don’t have a diamond the size of your head. It is the Crystal of this world, my main man.”“Um, kid, aren’t you like only 7?”“I’m ten. Got a problem with it?”“No, Skip, not at all.”

Since one of my handicaps states Timmy can’t get a job until Monday, it is decided he’ll spend today looking for a mate and working on his skills. Here he is working out and earning his first body skill point.

After a quick shower and calling for pizza (and a pizza delivery girl), he works on his painting, because I get points for portraits.

This chipper looking young man delivers the pizza. See, this would be nice if (1) this was a matriarch and (2), Timmy wasn’t a BOY. Grrr…

So Timmy calls for a maid and eats his pizza. Finally the maid comes along and lo-and-behold, it’s Grady. UGH! Grady, I love him because of his sideburns, but honestly, we need a chick.

I don’t think this Service Lover handicap’s going to work. I believe this is the first handicap I fail. :[

Timmy heads to Central Park where he meets Tamara Donner. I’ve seen Tamara in other legacies and I like her. She’s the right age and besides her funky nose, her genetics will go good with Timmy’s.

“So, Tamara, I know we’ve known each other for roughly fifteen minutes, but are you single? I must know, because I need to marry someone and have kids… like fast.”“Oooh, I’m so hungry. Hungry, hungry, HUNGRY!”

Everyone, except Timmy, was sporting hunger bubbles like Tamara. I think I was because someone made hot dogs and burned them. I don’t know.

After a little flirting with Tamara (found out she’s flirty), Timmy heads home and goes to sleep. Tomorrow in Sim-time will be Monday, so he can get a job (finally!) and then he’ll probably get closer with Tamara.

Morning comes, and Timmy needs something to do before the paperboy gets here. He has his leftover pizza for a third time.

Mail person is a dude… just my luck.

I bet if I had done a matriarch, all my NPCs would be chicks.

This is the first time I’ve ever seen a rock/gem/metal thing. It was a rainbow one. It was pretty, but I sold it because Timmy needed some cash. I’m not playing for the collection points.

The paper comes and the first job listed is in the Science field. It’s not one of my favorite careers, but the next Monday, I can always switch his job. That’s why I kept the ‘join Military want’ he has.

There was plenty of time to kill, so I sent Timmy to gather gardening skills.

Also, for being a kleptomaniac, Timmy sucks at it. He has yet to express interest in stealing anything. Dumb.

With plenty of time on his hands, Timmy—after waiting the five hours he was told to by Tamara—calls up his future beloved. They talk.

“And he told me that large, oversized bigger-than-your-head diamonds are the Crystal of our world! Can you believe that? I’m so going to display some when I go on cribs.”

Timmy must’ve liked what Skip told him earlier.

“We’ll have little tots in red shoes running around. It’ll be sweet.”

Notice the painting on the easel. It’s called ‘Girl In Pink’ and it’s hanging on the wall in his house now.

Timmy heads to work. A little mix-up occurred though, when I was hovering over the work icon and noticed it was clickable. Because I can be dense, I thought to myself “what happens when I click it?” So I did. He left work pretty quick after that… and I had to scramble to direct him to go back to work.

Now, when I make mac-and-cheese, usually, as per the directions of the box, I cook the noodles and then add the cheese. I don’t mix everything together and cook. Unless I’ve been doing it wrong.

After way to many times calling Tamara, she finally agrees to come over with the thought that Timmy is a little creepy. I’ve never seen that before, but it makes since.

Though if she had come the first time Timmy called, maybe she wouldn’t have to think like that.

But, their relationship definitely improved and was well worth it. :)

Opportunity to wash dishes for a job performance boost… CHECK!

Oh, Alma. Alma, Alma, Alma. Why couldn’t you have brought the bills earlier?“Because I like to torture you like you would torture in this house.”That works.

First comes love…

… then the thought of marriage …

… then comes marriage …

… THEN A BABY CARRIAGE… maybe.

After the whole “we can’t get to the bed because the room is too small” type of annoyance and a quick moving the bed to the yard, Tim&Tam head out to woohoo-ed it up.

With some of the money Tamara brought in, they were allowed to redo their house. It’s a pretty basic square with two rooms (one still incomplete), one bathroom, and a kitchen-living room-study combo. They still don’t have much money and this pretty much took up a lot of it.

I liked how this one house I saw was made, so I kinda-sorta copied it.

Still can’t afford windows… heh-heh.

And the newlyweds go nightynight.

Their double bed was decorated in their favorite colors… a purplish color and orange. Blue sheets because… why not?

The next morning, Tamara was promptly given a makeover before she went off to work. She cut her hair shorter and put on a pretty purple dress.

Timmy got a promotion thanks to finally being in a good mood and caught up with his skills, so they got windows!!! All over the house, and the baby room was given carpet. It’s still doorless though.

Attempt Numero Dos for a baby. Let’s hope it stuck.

Timmy went collecting. He got two unknown rare seeds, a diamond rock, two blue topaz rocks, and an emerald (?) rock. He needs a gardening skill of five to plant the rare seeds, so at dawn, he set out to plant his lettuce seeds, his tomato seed, and his grape seeds. He also spent plenty of time watching the Gardening channel on TV.

There is no rule in the handicap for who can write the family story, so Tamara worked on buffing up her writing skill so when she has time, she can write the story.

This is the collection of gems Timmy collected. After these were delivered, he went searching through the hills they live by and he found some more… and some more seeds as well.

Somewhere, Skip The Paperboy is impressed.

It only took them five tries, but she finally freakin’ popped.

Difficult baby maker. It’s a Saturday too, so she has Monday – Thursday of R & R and baby-caring-for.

And what a better way to celebrate a pregnancy than write Gen 1’s novel.

The McCrayonacy’s titled the book ‘The Awesometastic Adventures of Tim & Tam.’ The plan is that all books for each generation will be in that fashion.

“…And we’re having a bear with a skill bar!”“Huh?”“Just kidding! It’s a baby… unfortunately.”

In all seriousness, Tamara has the face to be a snob… she’s not.

Timmy enjoys the meal of champions in a rush: bread and jam.

Here’s Tamara’s picture of an opportunity she got. She’s entering a food making contest with mac & cheese, one of the few meals she knows how to make.

Go figure the computer would break just as Tamara goes into labor.

Good thing Timmy’s been like 4 for 4 on things he fixes.

Abraham here can’t fathom why a woman would go to the hospital to give birth. He’s clearly still living in the past-future of The Sims 2.

Abraham’s Pants Twin, Ian, showed up as well. Ian was wondering if he brushed his teeth that morning. Abe was wondering if giving birth qualifies as having a blast.

The Pants Twins talk about their awesomely amazingly cool-as-heck pants. Because what else would they talk about?

A Cool Dude Sun, apparently.

Oh, that’s the firstborn of the second generation, a.k.a. Brick Red McCrayonacy. He’ll henceforth be known as Brick. Brick was named after the crayon issued in 1949. He was born as a heavy sleeper and was given the trait brave by randomization. This is also where I’m going to end this.

So that my ninja magical gnome doesn’t get fussy.

Buh-bye!