March 19 2010

3:00 P.M.

257 HRCB

Global Careers for Two:How We Made It Work with Six Children, 32 Countries and 2 PhDs

Who Are We?

Frederick Crook Senior Economist, US Department of

Agriculture 40 years of expertise on rural China Traveled in all of China’s 31 provinces Author of 10 books and 190 articles on China President of the China Group – China

Consulting firm PhD, Fletcher School of Law & Diplomacy

(Tufts & Harvard)

Who Are We?

Elizabeth Crook Senior Analytic Service, US Government – 18

years Professor at Lingnan University and Dana Hall

School, Wellesley, MA. PhD, Fletcher School of Law & Diplomacy

(Tufts & Harvard) Treasurer of the China Rural Education

Foundation

Our Experience Was Individualistic

We are not offering our experience as a model for other couples.

We simply are relating what we did.

Each couple has to work out their own path.

Twelve Reference Points

Blend Family Patterns Form Joint Goals Give Mutual Professional Support Anticipate Life’s Events Respond to “Exogenous Variables” Share Responsibility for Child Rearing Involve the Children in Professional Activities

“A Time and a Season…” – When to Work and When to Stay Home

Cultivate Methods to Resolve Conflicts Develop a “Thick Skin” Have an Eternal Perspective Endure to the End

Blend Family Patterns

Crook Family Fletcher Family

Frederick and Elizabeth

Farm family in Fallon Nevada

Father educated at Utah State Uni. and Cornell

Mother educated at BYU

Suburban family in Short Hills, New Jersey. Father educated at BYU and Columbia University, General Counsel at Western Electric. Mother graduated from USC.

Form Joint Goals

These were ours, decided early in our marriage:

Christ-centered Family Life – Raising Children Most Important Goal

Personal Growth for Each Family Member Professional Development for Each Spouse

Give Mutual Professional Support

Alternate teaching at Dana Hall School, Wellesley, Mass Frederick - “House spouse” in summer 1967 Frederick’s gift of typing paper, Christmas 1969 Elizabeth editing Frederick’s papers (life-long!) Frederick at US Con Gen, Elizabeth at

Lingnan University (Hong Kong, 1974-76) Joint authorship of professional journal articles Frederick encourages Elizabeth to learn Chinese in Hong

Kong and Taiwan Frederick pushes computer skills Apple 2E, 1980 Elizabeth takes Frederick on trips to Vietnam, Mongolia,

Colombia, Abu Dhabi, Serbia, and Tanzania, 2004-2010

Work, school, child care, part time work

Elizabeth receives her Master’s Degree at the Fletcher School of Law and Diplomacy

Joint authorship in a refereed scholarly journal, 1976.

Elizabeth pitched in to help with the funding of poor rural students in Gan Quan County, Shaanxi Province.

Frederick Supports Elizabeth’s Travels between 2004-2010

Two Week Seminars for Foreign Government Officials

Japan

SouthAfrica

Kenya

Serbia Georgia

Sri Lanka

Mauritius

UAE

Afghanistan

Morocco LebanonAzerbaijan

Oman

Namibia

Albania

Vietnam

Mongolia

Colombia

CongoMaldives

Senegal Libya

We developed a time line for each child Start early morning seminary Drivers education, learning to drive Graduation from High School University Missions for children Job changes Marriages Work after retirement from US Federal Government Service Public service Church work

Anticipate Life’s Events

Yellow—baptismal year; Green—enter YM and YW; Red—university:Blue—possible times for missionary service; Purple—Mission in Taiwan

“The Best Laid Plans”…..: Flexibility in Responding to Exogenous Variables

1965—Frederick, you may lose your eyesight 1975—Frederick has bad job situation in Hong Kong Search for truth, not power 1976—”Do you know why I am calling you?”

“Yes, President Romney, you want me to go

to Taiwan.” 1980—Sixth child passes away, return from Taiwan 1981 Adopted an infant boy from Taiwan - Peter 1987 College expenses loom: Part-time work for

Elizabeth begins 1995 - 2003 Elizabeth—full time work

Our family agreed to adopt Pete from an orphanage in Taichung, Taiwan, 1981

Share Responsibility for Child-Rearing

    1)     Caring for sick children. Dan meningitis 2) Discipline—consistent between parents 2)     Cooking schedule—one child one dinner 3)     Cleaning—7th grade, own laundry 4)     Home work—shared the blessings 5) School and extra curricular activities 6) Boy Scout activities, music lesson,

sports     

Dad and Pete are camping with the Scouts. Pete achieved Eagle rank. Now 30 and married, he counts it as one of his major accomplishments.

Summer internships at our places of work The China Group and China Shop The China Rural Education Foundation Family home evenings Allowances, driving cars, cooking and cleaning Family residence in Hong Kong and Taiwan;

Family travel in China and Europe

 Involved the Children in Professional Activities

Cultivate Methods to Resolve Conflicts

1) Spouse and family evaluation sessions:

Name 2 things we did well and 2 things

that could be improved     2)   From leadership training sessions (US

Government training and BSA

Woodbadge training) we learned how to

give and receive constructive suggestions

Mutual Support

 

Friends Family Professors May try to offer their advice on how you should live your life. How you should pursue a profession, develop your agenda for

personal growth, and how you should raise your family. You should be respectful and listen, weigh the advice and

together chart your course.

Develop A Thick Skin

On self development Promote development of children Provide stewardship over resources—environment Live the law consecration Work for peace

Have an Eternal Perspective

Endure to the End

Stimulating and Service-Oriented “Golden Years”