Managing MyselfModule A Part 3

Self-Advocacy (1)

What is advocacy?

The definition of advocacy is the act of speaking on the behalf of or in support of another person, place, or thing.

• An example of an advocacy is a non-profit organization that works to help women of domestic abuse who feel too afraid to speak for themselves.

Source: http://www.yourdictionary.com/advocacy

What is self-advocacy?

• Speaking up or writing in support of yourself

• Standing up for your rights

• Standing up against discrimination

Activity #1: When have you advocated for yourself? When have others advocated for you?

You need to be able to advocate on behalf of yourself.

Why?

•Some people have advocates such as family, friends or organizations that can help with them. However,other organizations or people can't meet all of your needs.

•Even when you have an advocate helping you, being a part of the process can make you stronger and help you feel good about yourself.

Benefits of Self-Advocacy

• improved self esteem

• being able to communicate effectively

• improved problem solving skills

• being more assertive

Can you think of any others?

Other Benefits

• In order for others to know that you disagree with them or that your rights have been disregarded, you need to tell them!

• You know best what you feel, think, need and what your life situation is. Do not wait for others to speak up on your behalf – it may never happen!

• The people who have the authority to make decisions over your situation may think that every thing is fine if you do not speak up.

• By speaking out, you may be helping other people in the same or similar situations.

• You have a responsibility to take care of yourself. Speaking out will help you to keep your self-respect and dignity, even if you do not always get what you want.

• Remember that rules may not always be fair or suitable for you. You have the right to question rules, as they may not apply to your situation.

Source: Advocacy Curriculum (Self Help Alliance, 2010), p. 11

In order to advocate on your own behalf you have to believe in yourself.

Many people self-doubt.

Examples of self-doubt statements or thoughts:•I can't do it•I'm not smart enough•I'm afraid other people will laugh at what I have to say•I am afraid I will fail

Have you ever doubted yourself?

Activity #2: Things I cannot do

Your Inner Voice

• Do you have an inner voice?

You inner voice is the sum total of all your life experiences, values and morals. Your inner voice is driven by your conscience. It helps you determine what is

right and wrong. It also expresses how you feel about yourself.

• Is your inner voice negative or positive?

Activity #3: How positive is your self-image?

There are many ways a person can change negative thoughts and self-criticism to more realistic and positive thoughts.

Focusing on all of them at once may be overwhelming, but focusing on a few at a time and reminding yourself of these positive approaches regularly can change your self-esteem.

Using Positive Thought Strategies

Positive thought strategies are tools that can help you improve your self-esteem and become a stronger self-advocate.

1. Avoid exaggerating2. Stop negative thoughts in their tracks3. Be positive4. Accept your flaws and imperfections5. Don't be a bully!6. Don't feel guilty about things beyond your control7. Be kind to yourself8. Look on the bright side

8 Positive Thought Strategies

Follow along on the Positive Thought Strategies handout and circle or highlight strategies you think might work for you.

Positive Affirmations

Affirmations are positive, specific statements that help you to overcome self-sabotaging, negative thoughts. They help you visualize, and believe in, what you're affirming to yourself, helping you to make positive changes to your life and career.

Source:http://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/affirmations.htm

You can use affirmations in any situation where you'd like to see a positive change take place. These might include times when you want to: 

•Raise your confidence before speaking to other people, making presentations or going to important meetings. •Control negative feelings such as frustration, anger, or impatience. •Improve your self-esteem. •Finish projects you've started. •Improve your productivity. 

Source:http://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/affirmations.htm

Tip1: Affirmations should be formed in the present tense, as if they're already happening. This helps you believe that the statement is true right now. For instance, "I am well-prepared and well-rehearsed, and I can give a great presentation" would be a great affirmation to use if you often feel nervous speaking in front of a group. 

Tip 2: The power of affirmations also lies in their repetition. It's useful to recite your affirmations several times a day (have them pop up in your computer diary). You also need to repeat your affirmation as soon as you start to engage in a negative thought or behavior. 

Tip 3: Affirmations are more effective when they're thought or said with feeling. Every affirmation you choose to repeat should be a phrase that's meaningful to you. You need to want this change to happen.  Source:http://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/affirmations.htm

Examples of Positive Affirmation Statements

•I have plenty of creativity for this project. •I can do this! •My opinion is respected and valued by my family. •I am successful. •I am honest in my life, and my work. •I like completing tasks and projects on time. •I'm grateful for the job I have. •I'm bringing a positive attitude to school every day. •I am excellent at what I do. •I am generous. •I am happy. 

Activity #4: Positive Affirmation Statements

Complete the list of positive affirmation statements.

Write down four positive affirmation statements you can use that apply to things that are happening in your life right now.

Emotions

• any of the feelings of joy, sorrow, fear, hate, love, etc.

Source: dictionary.com

How do you think your emotions affect your ability to be a good self-advocate?

Do you think there is a difference based on whether you are male or female?

Activity #5 - Positive and Negative Feelings

• Review the list of feelings and decide if they are positive or negative.

• Think of a way to express the negative feelings more positively.

You are responsible for yourself.

One of the skills you need to be able to take care of yourself is to be able to speak out and speak up.

Improving your communication skills can help you do that.

Using positive language when you communicate will help you be a better self-advocate.

Using Positive Language

Using Positive LanguageFeelings are our own and people are entitled to them. Saying “You make me feel” may be taken as blaming others for our emotions as well as not recognizing they belong to me.

•Taking ownership of feelings involves coming to the understanding that my feeling reactions and experiences originate within me. They may be precipitated by external experiences and it is a more appropriate characterization and more accurate to say “When you did this” or “When that happened” “I feel” whatever feelings arose.

•“I messages” are a great way to own our feelings and still express our needs to others.

Source: Advocacy Curriculum (Self Help Alliance, 2010), p. 28

Using Positive Language:The "I-Message"

The formula for an I-message is:

•I feel _________________________________ (say your feeling)

•when you _____________________________ (describe the action)

•because _______________________________ (say why the action connects to your feeling)

Source: Advocacy Curriculum (Self Help Alliance, 2010), p. 28

Activity #6 : Using Positive Language

I feel.......when you ......because...........

Activity #7: Being Fearful

• Ask yourself: What is it that I am afraid of?

• Then ask yourself: What is the worst thing that can happen?

• Being afraid can cause you to act passively

Being Angry

• Being a good self-advocate doesn't mean being an angry person.

• You can be assertive and speak up for yourself without being aggressive and appearing angry.

• Anger might be the motivation for self-advocacy but you need to be able to control your anger to get other people to listen to you.

• Anger can cause you to act or speak aggressively.

Activity #8: Anger Checklist

• Complete the checklist to see if you need to work on your anger management skills.

This Power Point was created by Laubach Literacy Ontario.    The resources can be downloaded free of charge at www.laubach-on.ca.  

This Employment Ontario Project was funded by the Ontario Government. 2015 

All website links were accurate at the time of original distribution-March 2015.  All of the images and clip art used in this Power Point are from Clipart.com and

Microsoft Office.com.