Love My Family Through Better Communcation (Hyang Hee Kim)
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Transcript of Love My Family Through Better Communcation (Hyang Hee Kim)
1.Family = school of love
2.Parents to Children 3.Children to parents4.Practice at home
communication
천성경 제 5 편 참가정 , 4 장 2 절
The family is the most im-portant school of love in our life. The education of the emotions that only parents can provide equips children with depth and breadth of heart. This is the corner-stone upon which children’s character is built.
천성경 제 5 편 참가정 , 4 장 2 절
The family is also the school in which virtues and princi-ples are taught. Children should receive intellectual, physical and technical edu-cation upon this foundation of emotional and principled education. This is the heav-enly way.
1.Family = school of love
2.Parents to Children 3.Children to parents4.Practice at home
communication
천성경 제 5 편 참가정 , 4 장 4 절
What is it that parents should give to their children while educating them? Edu-cation should not be about knowledge but rather about love. Both father and mother should teach how to become one by loving one another. They should be-come a father and mother with whom god is pleased,
천성경 제 5 편 참가정 , 4 장 4 절
and the mother and father should be pleased with one another. At the same time, they should strive to be parents whom their children like; then the children will want to make their parents proud of them. This is how parents should educate their children.
The Parents’ word
• One of the strongest tools for contributing to children’s character • One of the best way to solve
children’s problem.
No control of emotions → scolding
When children get a bad score at school • Is there anything that you are
good at?!• Is this all you can do?!• You’re stupid!• I give up, You can’t do anything.
The purpose of communication
• To comfort children’s heart• To give courage and confi-
dence • To give wisdom
• To keep an open relationship with children*
Better communicationWhen they have bad score at school • You must be very sad and sorry...• It doesn’t mean that you won’t get better.
Your effort never lost. It will definitely come back. • If you tell me what I can do, I want to try
harder to help you as well.• You must be very tired and sad, have good
rest and lets think about it together later.
Closing your heart → scolding
Mum and Daughter Arguing D : I hate you mum!M : How dare you say that to your mum! Do you know how much sacri -fi ce I have made for you?!D : I’ve never asked for it!
Better communicationMum and Daughter Arguing M : Sorry for telling you off harshly. But I felt really sad when you spoke to me like that.D : I am sorry. I didn’t mean it. M : I know. You did it because you felt angry.
Interrupting → scoldingMum and Daughter TalkingM : How was school? Did something happen?D : Nothing (Upset).M : Please tell me, something happened to you right? D : Do you really want to know? Well...my friend Clara!! I hate her! I want her to die!M : What? How could you say that? Don’t speak like that in front me!D : Forget it! I can’t talk to you Mum.
Solving problem only → scolding
Mum and Daughter TalkingD : I got told off by my teacher for not bringing my homework. I finished it but I forgot to bring it..
M : I told you to pack your bag the evening before! Please listen to me for once!
Better communicationMum and Daughter Talking M : You feel upset because you got punished al-though you did your homework.D : Yes the teacher didn’t even want to listen what I had to say. M : How frustrating...(reading her emotion) But you know.. The teacher had to do that. Because its a rule to make it fair for everyone.D : yeah.. I understand...Next time, I will pack my bag as soon as I finish my homework!
Why do we tell chil-dren off?
Because we love them! But...
Hope → GreedAttention → interference
Support → control
Better communication
• Control our emotions• Understand from our children’s
view• Let them explain first • Tell them clearly, to the point and
one thing at a time.• Explain their options and
choices• Tell them in a way they can
understand
1.Family = school of love
2.Parents to Children 3.Children to parents4.Practice at home
communication
Truth is...• Parents never been parents
before. • They do love me so much.• No matter what, they are my
parents.
• My student’s story…
천성경 제 5 편 참가정 , 4 장 6 절
To love our parents is to love heaven and earth to love our children is to love humankind to love material things is to love the whole uni-verse.
천성경 제 5 편 참가정 , 4 장 6 절
We have to love our par-ents children and material things in our daily lives. These together are the microcosm of the uni-verse. We have to set this tradition in our family.
1.Family = school of love
2.Parents to Children 3.Children to parents4.Practice at home
communication
Practice at home • Purpose of communication → To keep an open relationship• Control our emotions• Understand from parents’/ chil-
dren’s view• Set heavenly tradition in the
family