LESSON 16

EDUCATIONAL SYSTEMS THAT DEVELOP BOTH SKILL AND WILL

UNDER CONSTRUCTION

Presented by

THE NATURAL SYSTEMS INSTITUTE

I. EDUCATIONAL SYSTEMS THAT DEVELOP

BOTH WILL AND SKILL

Two Extremes in Early Childhood Experiences And Their Role in Shaping Divergent Violent Life Styles

• TYPE I. Minimal supervision, below subsistence, neglect and abuse, chaotic mass of human contact, opportunities for trouble making, few avenues for constructive achievement, absence of recognition and reward, few status indicators, disenfranchised.

• TYPE II. Moderate supervision, above subsistence, material indulgence independent of behavior [entitlement], emotional abandonment, relative isolation, multiple avenues for constructive achievement, high demand for attainment, minimal recognition and reward. Derived, privileged status and assumed social prerogatives.

TYPE I. The Effect of Social - Emotional Abandonment on a Child As They Grow Into Their Adolescent Years in High Density Inner City Neighborhoods• Minimal supervision > high possibility of learning harmful, destructive behavior goes

without consequences and developing a sense of territorially within their roaming perimeters.

• Opportunities for trouble making > learning negative behavioral repertoires. • Neglect and abuse > feeling of being un-cared for and being the target of harm and

hate is condoned.• Below subsistence > feeling they deserve to have to go without basic necessities.• Superficial human contacts > no one matters to any one.• Minimal bonding with parenting adults > no possibility of developing empathy and

identification with anyone.• Few avenues for constructive achievement > lack of opportunity to learn positive

behavioral repertoires.• Absence of recognition and reward > learning to devalue efforts toward constructive

goals and to feel they are not perceive others and society and develop a stance that others and society are simply non-existent.

• Few status indicators > learning that they do not have a place, do not belong in or to society at large.

• Disenfranchised > learning their voice will not be heard and they have no stake in or responsibility to society.

• The Dys-functionality and lack of socialization is immediately obvious through the youths’ impulsivity and lack of discipline.

TYPE II. The Effect of Parental Inconsistent Involvement on a Child As They Grow Into Their Adolescent Years in Low Density Suburban Neighborhoods• Moderate supervision > learning that opportunistic behavior, learning when and how

to not get caught.• Above subsistence > learning the environment is benevolent.• Material indulgence independent of behavior > learning a sense of entitlement,

responsible behavior does not matter. • High demand for attainment > learning one counts, not as a person, but only in terms

of being a means to increasing parents’ own pride and standing among other adults, learning love is conditional.

• Emotional abandonment > learning their feelings are unimportant, they are not cared for, and learning to not care for others.

• Derived, privileged status > learning to assume social prerogatives over and immunity from limits and controls administered by authorities within the establishment.

• Relative isolation > not learning a sense of ownership of the territory and institutions of the community and developing unlimited territoriality in the mind..

• Multiple avenues for constructive achievement > developing a sense of possibility for one’s future while lack of actual achievement results in a sense of personal deficiency.

• Minimal and inconsistent recognition and reward > developing a sense of unfairness and injustice, developing resentment, fantasies of grand attainments, suspecting others of jealousy, and developing a sense of futility and resentment.

• The Dys-functionality and lack of socialization is not obvious. These youths present an appearance of conformity and normal progress since their public persona conforms while their inner world is alienated and angry toward themselves and the world.

Degrees of Freedom

of Choice Vary

With

Fam

ilies

From Childhood Through Late Teens There Is a Progression in Giving Over the Power of Decision Making with Respect to a Wide Range of Life Choices• The Parents typically determine life choices for their child and gradually turn decision making

over to their child. • The School personnel determine life choices for the child while they are in school. They, too,

gradually turn decision making over to the child.

Progression of Freedom for Decision Making

ChildPre-Teen

Early Teen

Mid-Teen

Late Teen

In Yard Alone> In Neighborhood Unsupervised> Stay Over Night> Take Car> Go to Other Cities

Flavor Ice Cream- Games-Extra Curricular Activities- Movies- Academic Track- College ChoicePatterns in relinquishing control influence degrees of developmental maturity with respect to the process of decision making

The interaction of acquisition of freedom of choice with the

development of maturity of judgment influences the type

and degree of rebellion, depression and rage,

suggestibility, and law violation.

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3

Deg

rees

of F

reed

om o

f C

h oic

e Va

ry W

i th F

a mil i

es

Difficulties in Teen Years Are Often Related to the Pattern of Turning Decision Making Over to the Teen

• Families vary in their patterns of turning decision making over to their children.

1 Some give children complete freedom of choice from the beginning.

4 Some have a steady, gradual progression of freedom.

Solution to this problem is to provide formal programs wherein students can assist one another to learn to identify problem situations, acquire skills in resolving such problems, confront actual situations, develop a knowledge of consequences and an understanding of how to use good judgment in life choices.

Free

Strict

Infant > EarlyChildhood> MiddleChildhood> PreTeen> EarlyTeen> MiddleTeen> LateTeen> YoungAdult

2 Some are very strict till child leaves home, then relinquish control.

2

3 Some are very strict and then, as transitioning

into late teens, totally relinquish control 5 Some begin by giving wide range of freedom, then become

strict in teen years only relinquishing control when the child reaches late adolescence

and then only with intense conflict of wills.

6 Some attempt to maintain strict control forever.

•Parental patterns of freedom of choice with respect to the timing and degree of granting their children freedom is largely determined by:

–Modeling of their own parents, –Reaction against their own parents, –Paradoxical attempts at reaction against yet with underlying modeling.–Paradoxical attempts at modeling yet with underlying reaction against.

•Timing is influenced by unusual difficulties at selected periods of growing up.•Their children, on the other hand, are influenced by the patterns of families in which there is a maximum degree of freedom.•Inconsistency between these freedom granting patterns and school policies and patterns often generate conflict with either or both students and parents.•This problem can be overcome with School programs that teach knowledge of consequences and maturity of judgment.

Determinants of Parental Choice With Respect to Patterns of Timing and Degree of Granting Children of Freedom of Choice.

Family Conditions in Which Youths Grow Up

• Implications for the conditions under which youths grow up.– The majority of youths today grow up in homes characterized by one or more of the types of families

listed in the left column which have one or more of the characteristics listed in the top row the above table.

– Growing up in one of these combinations is a sure breeding ground for mental, emotional, social, educational, and behavioral problems.

– Growing up in intact families with none of these characteristics does not guarantee that the parents are blessed with good parenting skills and their children are free from such problems.

– Given the current evolved structure of our society, communities, and economic and public institutions, almost guarantees an inauspicious upbringing.

• The conclusion is that to continue to preach reliance on the American family to be the provider of values education and instruction in citizenship is simply futile and counterproductive.

CharacteristicsTypes ofFamilies

Felonies SubstanceAbuse

Physical-Emotional

Abuse

Un-educated

Im-poverished

Intact

Single

Remarried

Other:Grand Parents,

Foster, etc.

ParentTeacher

Teacher-Parent interaction

Grows up to be parent

The Parent - Teacher - Youth Triad: A Generational Cycle

TeacherStudent

Grows up to be parent

ParentTheir

Child as Student

Parent has unconscious memory of their experience with teachers and school. They project those forgotten memories of teachers

and feelings toward them onto their child’s teachers. They live out these old feelings, e.g. resentment over imagined or real unfair

treatment, with their child’s teacher and as an adult can even the score. Unwittingly, they impose their unconscious feelings toward teachers and school on the child. They also inject their unfinished

business with their education and school into their relation with their child with respect to the child’s educational career. As a

result, we can not expect many, if not most, parents to be good models or coaches for their child’s education. In fact, in some

cases they may foist onto the child a need to be an adversary of the school and teachers and even take the child’s side against

school corrective or disciplinary action.

Futility of Preaching Parental Responsibility for Values Education and Accountability for Youths Behavior

• Putting the conditions under which the child grows up in its family and contemporary society along side the negative generational cycle, it does not seem reasonable to expect that parents today can, in a wholesale fashion, be relied upon to assume responsibility for values education and for accountability for their child’s behavior.

• If this is the case, then we must look for other programs to fulfill this function.

• Adequate programs should assess the kinds of difficult challenges our youth are facing and tailor specific programs to address as many of these challenges as possible.

• This means a re-thinking of our traditional ways of raising our youth.

• Effective programs will not be piece-meal, but rather will be developed as a system in which all participate in the manner in which they can be the most effective.

EXERCISES FOREDUCATIONAL SYSTEMS THAT DEVELOP BOTH SKILL AND WILL