All Eyes on Me By Erin O’Reilly

Lights, music, action! There I was, standing in front of an entire audience like a deer in head lights—frozen stiff. My palms were sweating and I could feel small droplets of sweat slowly form on the tip of my nose. I have never been so scared. I immediately regretted ever entering in the karaoke contest.

“What are you gonna sing, hun?” asked the D.J. My mind went blank and when I opened my mouth, nothing came out. He gave me a confused look. “Umm…” I looked out into the crowd to see what type of audience I was performing for. The majority of the folk looked to be in their mid 40’s and late 50’s. They weren’t the best dressed or groomed people, but people nonetheless and eager to hear some music. “I guess I’ll sing, ‘Ain’t to Proud to Beg’ by the Temptations.” He looked a bit shocked that I would choose such a song and gave me the go, “It’s all you.”

Rather than giving him a song to sing, I wished I told him that I would not be participating, but thanks for the offer. As I was standing up on stage I was trying to organize my thoughts and figure out just how I got there in the first place. It was just me and a microphone, plus forty some adults who were feeling pretty good from their drinks. I couldn’t see much as I tried to look out into the crowd for any familiar faces to help calm my nerves. It was very difficult due to the harsh lighting.

I had flashbacks of giving an oral presentation back in high school in front of thirty some students. I thought that was the worst time of my life. I was wrong, this was. I’m not much of a public speaker. In fact, public speaking is one of my greatest fears, so one could only imagine how terrified I was, getting ready to sing in front of an entire bar. I could only hope for the crowd to be nice and spare my feelings but clapping along and singing along.

The song began to play and my knees locked, losing any feeling in my legs. I cleared my voice and began to belt out the first few words, “I know you want to leave me, but I refuse to let you go!” I realized that maybe the song I chose was not the best choice considering half of it required strong vocals. After the first four or five lines, I was surprised that I hadn’t fainted yet. In fact, I was starting to enjoy myself.

The only singing experience I had was singing chorus and District Chorus in middle school and high school. That was years ago when I had practice, and singing with a bunch of other students. Today, my vocals are a bit rusty, perhaps even shot, and I was singing solo under several hot spotlights with a microphone to only enhance my beautiful voice.

I guess a few people realized just how nervous I was and sympathized and began clapping to the melody. I was so appreciative. Others followed their lead and before I knew it, the entire bar was clapping, cheering me on. That helped ease the nervousness and to my surprise, I began to feel the feeling in my legs again. I started a little shuffle up on stage while I was singing. I do not think I looked at the prompt with the lyrics at all while I was singing. I also didn’t notice it until half way through the song.

Towards the end of the song I was actually having a good time and did not feel as nervous or flustered. Everyone seemed to be enjoying the song and my singing, surprisingly. Even if I wanted to focus on one person in the crowd, I could not. The lights were blinding and all I could see were white glares. I glanced over at the D.J. a few times and he would smile while giving me a thumbs up.

The crowd was great and seemed to like the song. I was relieved to have picked a song they were familiar with and enjoyed. It would have been the death of me if I picked a song no one was familiar with or disliked. I would have been, “that girl” with bad taste in music only to follow up with a bad performance. I never saw myself doing any sort of karaoke; it’s just not my cup of tea.

The song was coming to an end and the crowd began to subside. I was surprised as to how riled up they got from the Temptations. I figured everyone likes the Temptations; you can’t go wrong with any song by them. In the end I was more surprised by myself. I actually did it, I actually sang karaoke on stage in front of a full crowd of people. The experience as a whole was pretty good. The beginning was terrifying, but as the song progressed, so did my attitude. For the most part it was enjoyable. I realized the less serious I was, the better. Would I participate in karaoke again? Probably not. But now I can say I actually did it and I can cross that off my Bucketlist.