Just Out of My Reach
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Transcript of Just Out of My Reach
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Chapter 1:
One more week. Thats all I had to wait. Thats all that
was left of my life. Ive been slowly leading up to this
decision. Slowly letting this sadness creep into my heart.
I watched, then, as my friends started leaving me. They
laughed together, about me, about my sudden outburst of
clarity. My sudden knowledge of my despair. I was going to
kill myself soon. And my friends decided to leave me,
thinking that this stage will pass me.
Stupid people.
I let my head fall into one of my small-fingered hands. I
could not wait to get back to my dorm room. My head ached
and I just wanted to be gone.
Uh, hi. I heard a deep voice, then a chair scratching
against the cafeterias floor. They room became silent. I
looked up to find the new boy. His parents had just moved
him here a couple weeks ago and he already had a bad
reputation. People started whispering.
Oh my goodness! Kyle REED just sat next to her! A voice
drifted to my ears. Of course, they were talking. The most
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popular, smartest girl in school is being visited by the new
bad boy.
Hi. I replied in my small voice. The voice that got me to
be school president. That voice had gotten me raped too.
I know you dont know me or anything, or at least you
dont remember me, but we used to be friends. And I think we
should talk. He looked straight into my eyes and I couldnt
blink. His light gray eyes felt like they were seeing right
through me. I felt like someone had just cut me open and was
examining me on a dissection tray.
Okay. It seemed forced. My voice came out softly, only as
loud as a breath. He smiled and stood. He reached a hand out
to me. It seemed such a normal gesture, but it was big one
for me. It took all the strength I had to grab that large
hand.
However, at that moment I knew, this boy was going to
change my whole life around and good or bad, I was
surprisingly happy about this fact.
I think at that moment, I was both scared and excited. My
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mind was reeling from his smooth hand over mine. My nostrils
were filled with his musky, sweet sent. I had never smelt
anything like that. It was the most amazing smell in this
world.
As he pulled me to a standing position in front of him, I
looked around. My friends were stopped in the middle of the
double doors, staring at us. Everywhere I looked, someone
was starring. EVERYONE was starring. This did not scare me,
as to I have been in the spotlight for ages. But the thing
that had scared me was the fact that Manny would not even
look at me. Her long blonde hair was tied tight on top of
her head. I could see her bright green eyes, the ones that
reminded me of our late mother, because she was starring
right at Kyle. Her eyes were angry. But the thing that I saw
was her sadness. Her outright despair swirling within those
striking eyes.
Are you going to come? His voice knocked me out of my
thoughts, out of my stare on my sister.
Yes. I answered back with a frown. He led me to the
backdoor we were hand in hand. I felt the need to blush, but
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I kept that hidden within my mind. That boy had done
something to me, I knew. He had messed with my heart in mere
seconds of meeting him. He was good.
As we exited the cafeteria, my mind started to drift,
pulling away from my body. I held on tight to my
consciousness. I didnt want to miss the conversation. I
needed to know who this boy was. I wanted to know if I had
had this type of reaction to him when I was his friend.
Just hold out a little longer. You can make it to the
library, right? He knew about my sickness. My depression
too?
I think so. I answered truthfully. I knew who he was now.
Kyle. The boy who had loved me with no expectations. He had
loved me with all of his worth and I had cheated on him.
He had been away on a trip to Italy. I was afraid he would
break up with me when he got back. Afraid he would be mad at
me for choosing to stay home our freshman end of the year
trip.
So I found the hottest guy at a party my friend took me to,
and had made out with him. Kyle got home and the stupid boy
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told him. The next day Kyle wouldnt talk to me. He wouldnt
talk to me any time after that. Then I had moved away. Never
getting to explain myself, this really, if you think about
it, wouldnt have helped anyways. Since then, I havent gone
out with anyone else. I was afraid that Kyle thought the
same thing I did. That we were still together. That if I
went out with someone else, it would be considered cheating.
Again.
I fell to the concrete. We were just at the library door
now, but I could not move. I heard the words that always
formed in my head. The whole Im so sorry. But I would not
let those words escape. That would be the wrong thing to
say, I knew.
Emily? His deep voice rang through my body. My heart
ached, but his probably ached more. Or maybe not anymore.
The second thought hurt more.
I didnt answer him. I couldnt. I felt myself falling
apart. Falling deeper into the land of no return.
Emily, answer me. His voice held worry within its deep
melody. His breath was warm on my ear, but I kept my face in
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my hands, kept me hair hiding my tears.
Damnit Emily, He pulled me up by my armpits and swung me
to face him. Now listen hear, you better answer me in ten
seconds, or I will make you. His voice was dangerous, but
soft and soothing at the same time. This was the voice Ive
longed for in the middle of the night. This was the voice I
wanted to hear, not the rough panting of Chris. Or the pain
he had created inside my innocent mind.
Im fine. I said. What a liar, I tell myself.
Then look at me. His voice was softer, angrier. I removed
my hands and looked up at him through my hair. He swept it
softly out of my face, his hand so careful, as if I might
break.
Why are you crying? He asked. I just shook my head and
wiped away the evidence. I did not want him to see me hurt.
I wanted to be strong for him, if not for me.
No reason. Lets go inside. I got inside and smelled the
air. The smell of a library was amazing. It could calm my
frayed nerves at anytime. I calmly walked to the back,
smiling at Mrs. Walsh as we passed. She of course smiled at
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me, but surprisingly smiled at Kyle too. As we got to the
back, Kyle grabbed my arm and turned me slowly.
Emily, you might not remember me well, or not at all. I
know all of this, but I wanted to see if you remembered me.
His bright gray eyes were so familiar now; I dont know how
I hadnt seen it earlier. Kyle shook his head, as if shaking
of his nervousness.
My name is Kyle Reed. I think you should at least know
that from the rumors, though. I know Ive changed so much
since the last time we met, but hopefully you remember the
boy I am, or used to be. He continued. But I let my fingers
float to his lips, silencing him. He stopped admittedly, but
kept his eyes on me. Waiting.
I, I paused. I couldnt say I was sorry. That wasnt what
he needed to hear. Remember you. I smiled sadly. His face
changed shape. It became sad at first, then blank. Totally
unreadable.
You remember me, It was more of a statement than a
question. I hadnt expected that. Most girls dont remember
their first boyfriend. And since it ended so differently
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than it started, I was sure you had forgotten. Sadly, I
had. I had buried it down so deep in the darkness of my mind
it came out now like an old movie. But that was from pain.
From so much hurt I couldnt even breathe while thinking of
it.
I, Then I faded out into myself.
When I woke up, I was in the nurses office. My head was
aching and my throat was dry.
Water. I croaked out. The nurse raced over to me. Her
kind face was exactly what I needed, not the jarring image
of Kyle, big boned boy sleeping in one of the foldable
chairs. His brown hair was spread softly over his cheek and
his jacket was covering half of his torso.
Hes been here all night. She replied to my stare. Kyle
just shifted in his seat, and then settled back in.
Such a sweet boy. I whispered and smiled. I hadnt really
listened much to the rumors, but Lisa, my best of friends
had. She had rambled off at lunch about how Kyle got
arrested last spring He has had sex with, like, ten girls
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here already He is a total freak, but a total hot one.
And so much more. I could tell how people thought that about
Kyle. His big frame threatened people. His cloudy eyes
seemed distant and his brown hair was shaggy. He usually
wore ripped jeans with a big hoodie, which consisted of
skulls and crossbones, to blood. He also always had his
headphones in. I mean always. I havent seen him without his
music with him since the first day I met him. The first day
my eyes had fallen on this boy who was alone in the
darkness, and I had wanted to jump in there with him.
The nurse handed me a cup of water, and I drank greedily
from it till it was all gone.
Since you finally woke, would you mind if I went back to
my own room? She whispered above Kyles small snores here
and there. I nodded with a little giggle.
You can wake him up and you two can go, if you are feeling
well enough. Okay Emily, dear? I nodded once more, and then
she was gone. Her heels clicked down the tile hallway.
Suddenly the room was silent. It scared me. Silence was
louder than sound.
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Silence let the memories of that night in.
Just shut up! The words echoed through my head. I will kill
you. Dont think I wont!
Stop it! I screamed. I could not see Chris anymore, but
the voice was haunting, crazed. He kept grabbing at me in
the dark. He connected his fist with my eye and I went down
to the ground with a sickening thud. My body hurt and as he
tore off my clothes, all I could do was scream my throat
dry.
Let me go! I yelled into the light, silent room. I looked
up and saw Kyle. He had a hand on each of my shoulders and
he was holding me down, fear and worry clear inside his
eyes.
Emily, My name floated of his lips, and I cried. Not just
the fake stuff you see on T.V. No, this was full on, body
rocking, coughing and sputtering, SOBS. I could not hold
back anymore; I had to let the pain out. From losing my
mother and unborn brother, to letting Kyle go, and most of
all, the pain of the rape. The pain of holding inside,
afraid of the threat he had made me.
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I will kill whoever you tell. He had held true to his
words. He had killed my mother. All though, they say it was
a total accident. It was because of drunk driving. Sure.
Emily, calm down. You are okay. I am here. He soothed my
wet face with his smooth thumbs. I hiccupped and stopped
crying.
Good girl. he was holding me close. Our lips were merely
inches apart. I could feel me drifting closer, and he
drifted too. Soon our lips brushed each others and it was
all over. His lips calmed me, made my mind go blank, made me
want to lose everything for and with him. I wanted him. I
knew that, for once, I knew what I wanted. And what I wanted
was so out of my reach it wasnt even funny.
I snapped back, hitting my head on the bed frame. This
could not be happening. This was horrible. I squeezed my
eyes shut.
I wont hurt you. He whispered for my ears alone.
I will. I said back with all my pain and anger.
Everything I had, I put into those two simple words that
meant so much to both of us. That meant too much to me, that
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I barely made them leave my chapped lips. I wanted Kyle more
than anything in this entire world. But I couldnt have him
even if I wanted to. He was out of my reach.
Chapter 2:
As I walked down the stairs to my room, I replayed the last
five minutes of my life. I saw Kyle, his eyes wide with
anger and surprise. He had jerked his huge body off the bed
with such grace it seemed choreographed. His eyes were
spitting fire, but more for himself than me.
Bye. His voice was snipped, but he didnt leave. He just
stood there. I looked down to see what he was staring at and
saw the scar. It was long and thin, curving around my neck
and downwards. He could not see the end of it, but it
crossed through both of my breasts, down to my bellybutton,
and then it ends with a small shape. A shape of a bleeding
heart.
What the hell, He walked back over but I snapped at him
with Nothing!
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The small word was silent, but it seemed to echo through
the large room. He had abruptly turned around and walked
out. His body language said it all. He would not be visiting
me anymore.
Now, I reached into my pocket and took out my key. I
carefully unlocked the door, and pushed it open slowly. I
could feel something wrong. I could just feel it.
I smelt it before I saw anything. It was a hideous odor.
Something was dead and as I switched the light switch to
on, I saw exactly what it was. It was a she. Her long neck
was snapped back. Her brown hair sprinkled the floor. There
was a big gash in her neck, and blood covered my white
carpet. My stomach cramped as I saw what she was wearing.
She had the same brown eyes as me. She had the same blue
top in as me, but her shorts were pink, not purple. Someone
had killed her thinking it was me.
I threw up.
I ran up the stairs, taking two at a time. I found which
one was Kyles, and tried to turn the knob. Surprisingly it
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came open with a BANG. I saw his roommate Nelly, the only
emoish punkish guy in this school. He turned to look at me,
and he saw the blood.
What the hell? He asked with a southern accent. Kyle!
He yelled is voice panicky. Kyle walked out of the hallway
wearing some sweatpants and no top. Any other time I would
have taken the time to appreciate his chest, but this was
NOT the time.
Emily, are you hurt? Was his first question as he ran to
me, already checking my body for injury.
N-no-o. I stuttered and shook. I couldnt stop shaking.
Kyle led me to his couch and set me down.
Tell me what happened. Everything will be okay. He held
my small hands in his large ones.
No. It wont be okay. She is dead, Kyle. I walk into my
room, and shes laying there. Her neck bent back, almost
elegantly, taunting me. Her brown eyes were open, fear shown
on her face. Shes wearing the same outfit as me and she
was in my room. She DIED because of me! My whisper grew to
a shout. Kyle was gesturing to Nelly, yelling at him to call
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the on-campus police, and then they will call the real ones.
Kyle helped me up and asked me to show him my room.
I cant go in there again! You cant make me! I fought
him. He grabbed my hands and set them on his chest.
Shhh, I will be the one going in. Dont worry. He had
whispered to me. Everything else went by so fast. I led Kyle
to my room and he promptly came straight out. His face was
white, but he did not throw up like I did.
That was your throw up, right? He asked calmer than I had
been. I nodded as I heard the on-campus police coming. They
cant save her. Shes dead, was the only thought running
through my head. She is DEAD. I burst out in sobs for the
second time that night, not counting the time at the
library.
Kyle just held me there. He held me tight to his warm, bare
chest. His strong arms wrapped around me comfortingly. I
missed this about him. But I still didnt deserve his love.
I closed my eyes and clung to him.
I was so afraid.
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My body was splayed out on Kyle and Nellys couch. My mind
was racing, faster and faster thru the endless
possibilities. Chris? Had he actually tried to kill me? Or
was it someone else, someone who hated me.
Hey, Kyle walked out of his room, looking at me with a
sleepy expression. I forced myself to smile back. Hey, I
copied his natural flow of things, which only seemed right.
You need to get some sleep. Youve been up for too long.
He ruffled my brown hair and smiled down at me as if we were
still best of friends.
So much had changed; we both had separated, drifted apart
within the two years.
Im fine, He raised an eyebrow, Really. It sounded fake
to even my ears. Instead of insisting I answer him
truthfully, he just picked up my legs, sat down, and then
put my legs back down, onto his thighs.
Hey! I said in surprise. He just chuckled, the sound
making my heart swell for my lost love.
Your smile is cute. His eyes were serious, but he had his
crooked half smile placed across his face.
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I blushed deeply. No. Its imperfect. My teeth are all
jacked up. My bottom lip is too thick and my top lip is,
Kyle laughed loudly, interrupting my sentence.
Jeese Emily cant you just shut up and say thank you? His
familiar eyes twinkled with humor, and as I blushed deeper,
love. I didnt want to believe it. It past so fast, I almost
didnt, but then he kissed me. And it only lasted seconds. I
wanted more as I pulled him closer to me, on top of me.
Emily, He warned. I didnt care.
Kyle, I copied him. He shook away a smile, and glared
down at me.
Im serious here. He replied with anger in his voice.
And so am I. I pulled his lips down to mine. I couldnt
help it. I loved him so much. And he loved me back. I knew
it couldnt last forever. I didnt have forever. I had a
week. Yet, I was so afraid of Chris, or the actual thought
of dying. Why couldnt I just give it up? My whole life was
revolved around lies. Im fine. I told everyone, never
once mentioning that I got raped. I knew the consequences to
that. Death was all that would bring. Somehow, Chris would
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find out. I just knew it.
As Kyle pulled away, someone knocked on the door. He slowly
got up to answer it, or what seemed like it. Everything was
going in slow motion. I could feel my lips moving, telling
him something didnt feel right. He brushed it off and
opened the door. There stood Chris, smiling like a welcomed
neighbor.
Is Emily here? His lips formed the words, but I could not
hear them. I was in shock. I was horrified, terrified. My
heart beat so fast I thought it might explode.
Emily, Kyle called, looking straight at my unwavering
eyes. He saw it too. He saw the fear in my eyes.
Shes really tired, how bout you come by tomorrow? He
turned back to Chris, his eyes totally blank.
Sure. Chriss voice was blank. They just stood there,
starring.
Good night, Emily. Chris called out and left. Kyle shut
and locked the door.
Who was he, and why does he scare you so much? This was
why I couldnt be with him. I did not want to ever lie to
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him again.
I, I paused. What could I say that wouldnt be lying?
Cant talk about it. I finished. He just stared at me. He
wanted to probe, but he knew me too well. Knew it would only
make me recede farther into my shell.
Okay. Was all he said. He just stood there, and I sat. We
couldnt take our eyes off each other. We both needed each
other, but I could not have him. He dissevered better. He
dissevered a life. A beautiful girl who would treat him
right, who knew him almost like he knew me. I smiled sadly
at him, Goodnight. Escaped my small lips. He nodded and
walked off. The lights went off and I laid right back down,
as if nothing had happened, as if he hadnt come out at all.
I walked down the road, freezing in the cold air of the
night.
Hey! I heard a yell. I turned around to find a car in
idle behind me. Do you need a ride, I could give you one.
I nodded, Okay, The passenger door swung open and I got
in.
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Youre Chris, right? I asked him.
He nodded and smiled. Yeah, I am. Emily, right? He looked
at me; my name came off his lips with affection. That
troubled me. He had asked me out before, but I always turned
him down, always saying I had plans and a boyfriend.
We drove on in silence, heading the wrong way. Ah, my
house is that way. I pointed behind us. He shrugged. My
mind started to go through scenarios.
Maybe, I started. He just glared, shutting me up before I
really even started.
We are going to my house, okay? I stared at him. Was he
going to hurt me? I wondered minutes later. We turned on a
dirt road, headed up to the old Johnsons home.
Where are you taking me? Nobody lives up here! My voice
was shaky and it squeaked at the end.
Dont worry babe. We will be there soon. He replied. He
was absolutely nuts! We pulled into the long driveway. I
threw open my door and jumped out.
My feet hit the ground hard and the loud sound echoed
through the darkness of the night. I started running. Thump.
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Thumb. Thumb. My feet pounded on the ground, each step
making a distinct noise.
Get over here! Chris yelled, pulling my arm. I lost my
footing and I hit the ground. Hard. Dont be afraid. His
voice was cold. My heart beat faster.
Let me go! I screamed as I got back up and ran a little
more. It was pitch black and I screamed for help. For
anyone.
Just shut up!
I awoke screaming, Kyle was there, trying to calm me.
Emily, its okay. He whispered. Slowly I came back to
reality.
I sat up shaking my head, as if shaking away my dream. My
memory.
Im fine. I told him, wanting it to be true.
Okay. He knew I was lying, but didnt say anything about
it. I smelled food, bacon and, another sniff, pancakes.
Do I smell bacon? I asked in surprise. Bacon was my
favorite food.
Yeah. Do you want any? He got up before I answered,
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knowing it would be a definite yes.
Sure. He pulled me up. I smiled. He seemed over whatever
had gone on in the nurses office and last night, which
should be a good thing, but my heart ached anyways.
As we walked into the kitchen, I looked down at Nelly. His
hair was wet and dripping onto the table. He was
concentrating on a drawing. Carefully sketching each line.
Each small detail, he captured. The picture was of me. Of
course, not of me now. It was when I had been with Kyle. My
brown hair was such a contrast to my new honey blonde locks;
it was like looking at another girl. Someone I didnt really
know, with chubby, smiling cheeks, bright sparkling blue
eyes, and glasses too big for her small shaped face. She
looked happy, which was a foreign concept to me now. I had
been innocent then. I closed my eyes in pain. If only.
Whered you get that picture? I asked calmly. My eyes
traveled along the drawing, looking for some hint of me in
it. I found none.
Kyle said I could use any of his pictures that he already
entered into the art festival for inspiration. I used this
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one. Nelly answered my question with a raised eyebrow.
She very pretty. My voice was soft. He smiled and nodded.
Shes a natural beauty. Never seen anyone like her.
Yeah. Me neither. I heard Kyles voice as if I was in a
tunnel. I was reliving that moment. That beautiful day.
Kyle! Kyle! Did you see that! That was a sign of good
fortune!
What? I didnt see anything. Kyle scrunched his eyebrows
and looked around. I smiled up at him.
Stop playing around! Three ladybugs landed on me! THREE!
Thats so awesome! I yelled as I jumped around in front of
Kyle. He just chuckled.
Today, he was wearing a blue striped shirt with his
customary Tripp pants. His hair was ruffled from us
playing, and his face was bright.
You look good today. Happy. I told him as he grabbed my
hand again, leading me to the swings. Most people thought we
were going out, I sometimes wish they were right. But I was
fine where I was.
Well, thank you. Thats good, right? He teased. I stuck
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my tongue out at him. He smiled.
We sat on the swings and began swinging. He took out his
camera and was messing with it.
Hey, Emily He looked over at me with a serious
expression.
I stopped swinging. What? I was concerned. Suddenly he
made a funny face. I laughed and smiled. His hands came up
lightening fast and the camera flashed before my eyes.
Hey! I yelled, but he had already put the camera down and
grabbed my shirt. He pulled me close and kissed me hard.
Kyle? I murmured as he let go.
Will you go out with me? He asked. I numbly nodded. I was
too happy to move. A smile slowly crept upon my lips.
That day had been perfect. We had been so happy. I looked
back at Kyle and saw a faint smile there. As if he might
just be remembering too.
Breakfast? HE asked. I nodded. WE would never be the same
again. We would never be able to go back to that day, or
before that. We both have changed and that concept hurt more
than the memories.
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Chapter 3:
I peered down the hall, staring at my dorm door. Yellow
Caution tape was still hanging limply across it, drawing
in eyes of passer-byers. They whispered, their voices just
murmurs of the wind, just sounds that faded into
nothingness.
The police had called Kyle after breakfast, relaying a
message about how I could get some stuff they had already
cleared as of no use. They put it all in a box by the door.
And as I stood there, staring at that very box, I could not
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move any further towards it.
Is that Emily? She looks horrid. My head swiveled towards
the voice. There stood my sister and a smaller girl with
strawberry blonde hair. My sister adverted her eyes and I
wondered for the umpteenth time, what was she thinking?
Manny, I stopped her. Tension filled the hall. She looked
at me with a blank face.
Emily, I cant talk with you right now, or ever. Her lips
curled in a snarl. Why was she so angry with me?
Why not? I insisted as her friend squealed with delight.
You know Emily! Oh my goodness! That is so totally cool!
We both ignored the girl, off in our own little world of
pain, anger and despair.
I dont have time for you. Manny brushed her hair out of
her face and I finally could see our mother in her.
Well, I replied somberly, we need to talk.
About what?! She snapped at me, Not mom! No. You wont
even talk about her death. You act as if she was never even
alive! She stomped right up to me.
I cant, I just cant yet. I whispered to my little
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sister. My heart ached, for me, for her, for the loss of our
entire family and her lost childhood.
No. You can. I know it. You just choose not to. Goodbye
Emily. And then she left, the girl trailing behind like a
confused puppy.
Sighing, I took a few more steps toward the door. Five more
steps and I could reach it. Five more steps and I could grab
the box and leave that hall that held sadness.
The closer I got, the more I thought of the girl who had
died. She had died right there, in my room. On my floor.
Because of me, she had lost her life, lost everything. Her
family had lost her.
Her name was Jennie. I heard a voice behind me say. I
turned around. Nelly looked at me with cold eyes, so
different from breakfast.
Jennie, I repeated the word, as if it was a foreign
concept, some foreign word.
Yes. Jennie Alt. He looked passed me, probably at my
door.
You, uh, knew her? My voice cracked. The poor girl. This
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poor soul.
Yeah. Yeah, I did. I also loved her. The sadness in his
eyes mirrored my own, from the loss of our loved ones.
Im sorry she died. I gave him a hopeful look. He must
have still been used to the pity that oozed off of the
people around us, people who havent lost a love one, an
accentual part of their life, because his eyes filled with
happy tears.
Yeah me too. He smiled a little. I walked up to him and
hugged him tight enough for him to laugh a little.
Dont worry, just remember the good times. Remember and
rejoice over the time that she was next to you. It might not
help you right away and it might take you a while, but
youll see what I mean. I whispered into his ear. I felt
him nod. I let go and smiled up at him.
Have a good day. I murmured as I turned around to face my
own fate.
Yeah, you too. I listened as he walked away from me. His
footsteps leading the way out to the Light, while mine led
me deeper into the Dark.
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My hands trembled. I franticly brushed hair out of my eyes
and ran. My footfall made a thumb. Thumb. Thumb, pattern
into the dark hallway. For a moment, I didnt hear the tell
tale footsteps of my pursuer. Only my loud clicks sounded in
the air. But softly, almost as light as the air moving, you
could hear the sound of boots thudding against the tile.
Faster and faster as they got closer towards me. I heard a
yell, of either triumph or anger, I will never know, but
when I turned around, I saw nothing. The silence filled my
head, filled my cold heart.
And as I contemplated the thought of death once more, I saw
the picture of the old me, the memories faded from my mind
and all there was left to ponder over was whether or not he
would miss me. And as the cold set into my bones, I became
aware of the shadow lurking at the end of the hall. Waiting,
watching, wanting. I opened my mouth to scream, but nothing
came out. I was frozen. I knew that this time hed kill me,
or I would kill myself. My eye lids felt heavy, so I let
them drift shut. Two days ago, I would have killed myself. I
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made it out of that week, but now, I was afraid I wouldnt
make any it further.
Emily, The whispery tone hid his voice, hid his identity.
Leave me alone! I finally managed to yell.
Emily, Was all he repeated. I was terrified. I held my
breath, and woke up.
Springing awake, I wiped the sweat off my face. Staring out
Kyles dorms window, my mind went blank. Everything was
happening to fast. They had found another girl dead, she
also looked just like me, dressed like me. Kyle assured me
it wasnt because of me, but I knew. You cant just cover
that up with some sweet story. I looked up at the clock,
one-o-clock in the morning. Too earlier to wake up, too late
to go to sleep. My insomnia was horrible tonight and as I
sat there reflecting on my life, I felt eyes on me. Spinning
around on my heels, I see Kyles outline in front of me, no
shirt, as usual, and his bulging biceps crossed over his
chest.
Hey, you okay? He asked, unfolding his perfectly
sculptured arms.
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Fine. I turned back to the window. We decided against
talking about the past, or what withheld the future. We
barely talked. Just stood there and stared, either at each
other, or the sky.
Bad dream? He questioned. Small talk.
Yeah. Again. And then it was silent. I hated the silence.
Come with me. He pulled me by the arm out of the door,
through the halls and towards the entrance of the building.
He yanked the big double-doors open and the freezing air
swooped in. I shivered out of chill, and wished Kyle talked
more, said something about anything.
We walked across campus me shivering and following him with
no questions. I trusted him completely. Kyle I started to
ask him where we were going, but he suddenly stopped. I ran
right into him and almost fell on my butt. He caught my arms
and pulled me tight to him. Ours lips brushed and little
fires started where we were touching. Kyle I tried again
but he captured my mouth instead. The moon was shinning
bright upon us like a sun.
Emily. My name on his lips was what broke my control. My
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fingers entangled in his hair and I let my body go. Let my
heart be free.
We stood there in the middle of the garden area and kissed.
We were pressed so tight together I felt over heated. His
cold hands slipped up the back of my shirt and I gasped.
Kyle, we shouldnt. I whispered. He just bit my lip and
kept kissing me like there was no tomorrow. Like this was
our only chance, and it was. His hands slipped up and down
my back rhythmically. They slipped down and grabbed my ass.
I jumped up as he pushed and wrapped my legs around his
waist.
Wereallycant. I gasped between kisses. He ignored me.
I held on as he backed me up into the stone wall of the
academy.
Emily! Kyle! The words echoed through my head and I
dropped. My head hit hard against the wall and I bruised my
butt on the way down.
Manny, I looked at her with surprised eyes. Manny saw
that. She sawme act like a whore. This was bad. This was
really, really bad.
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What the hell Emily? You bitch! Her scream sliced through
the night air and I flinched. She pushed the shocked Kyle
out of the way and picked me up by the hair.
Ow! I yelled and she kicked me in the gut. Arg. I
groaned. I grabbed her legs and we both crumbled to the
ground. Her hold on my hair loosened and I sat on top of
her. I was breathing hard, either from wrestling or kissing,
or maybe both.
Whatareyousomadabout? I gasped out between breaths.
She glared at me, squirming underneath my weight.
Youre playing him. Just like all those other boys. Just
like everybody! They believe youre good! Youre not! Youre
a slut! Youre the reason moms dead! She screamed at me. I
was frozen as she pushed me off her and slapped me. She ran
away crying. I just sat there. Kyle tried to get me to talk,
to look at him. I blinked and everything went blurry. I
tried to stand, but fell again. What was going on? The
disease, I told myself. It was getting worse. I felt sick. I
threw up my dinner, or the little I had eaten. I couldnt
stand. I fell backwards and passed out from the pain.