Journalism 1Week 10, 11 and 12

Bell work #15A comma splice occurs when two

independent clauses are joined with only a comma

Incorrect: I enjoyed my time as a Boy Scout, I learned many skills.

Reminder: ◦Label Bell work #15◦Write the statement◦7-minute writing

Bell work #15A comma splice occurs when

two independent clauses are joined with only a comma

Correct: I enjoyed my time as a Boy Scout, and I learned many skills.

Correct: I enjoyed my time as a Boy Scout; I learned many skills

Correct: I enjoyed my time as a Boy Scout. I learned many skills.

Bell work #16 Active voice presents the subject of the sentence as the doer of

the action of the verb. Passive voice presents the subject of the sentence as the receiver of the action of the verb. Active voice is preferred as being less wordy and more direct.

Active Voice: The school board expelled 17 students last night for their part in vandalizing the science lab last March.

Passive Voice: Seventeen students were expelled last night by the school board for their part in vandalizing the science lab last March.

Active Voice: Prom committee members decorated the gymnasium. Passive Voice: The gymnasium was decorated by prom committee

members.

Note: Passive voice is preferred when the receiver of the action is more important than the doer of the action, or when the doer of the action is unknown.

Passive Voice: Senior Steve Johnson was arrested last night and charged with embezzling funds from the student government,

Passive Voice: More than $2,500 in damage was done by vandals who broke into the science lab during the weekend.

Bell work #17Pronoun-antecedent agreement problems

occur when the pronoun is plural but the antecedent is singular. Pronouns must agree in both number and gender.

Incorrect: The First Lutheran Church will hold their annual chili supper Friday evening.

 Incorrect: Each reporter must submit their story by deadline.

Incorrect: The team won their last three games.Reminder:

◦ Write the Statement and examples◦ 7-minute writing

Bell work #17 Pronoun-antecedent agreement problems occur when the

pronoun is plural but the antecedent is singular. Pronouns must agree in both number and gender.

Correct: The First Lutheran Church will hold its annual chili supper Friday evening.

Correct: Members of the First Lutheran Church will hold its annual chili supper Friday evening.

Correct but wordy: Each reporter must submit his or her story by deadline

Correct: The team won its last three games.

Bell work #18 Subject-verb agreement problems occur for a variety of reasons. The most

frequent problems occur when using collective nouns, such as team, committee, council, faculty, and board. Collective nouns take a singular verb when used to mean a single group acting together or in agreement.

◦ Example: The committee is unhappy with the results of the vote.

Collective nouns take a plural verb when used to refer to group members acting as individuals or in disagreement. Writers avoid the problem by adding the word members.

◦ Correct: The faculty were split in their reactions to the vote,

◦ Better: The faculty members were split in their reactions to the vote.

Note: Some words are plural in spelling but singular in meaning. These take a singular verb.

◦ Example: Much of the news today is bad news.

◦ Example: Economics is a fascinating subject.

Other plural words, although referring to a single item, take a plural verb.

◦ Example: Those new jeans are distinctive

◦ Example: Scissors were used to cut the screen Reminder:

◦ Write the Statement and examples

◦ 7-minute writing

Bell work #19Word Choice Issues   More than or over?

◦ More than refers to a number, over refers to a position. Incorrect: Over 30 students volunteered to clean the stadium. Correct: More than 30 students volunteered to clean the stadium.

Because of or due to?◦ Because of modifies a verb. Due to modifies a noun and

usually follows a form of the verb “to be”. Examples: He failed to get into college because of a poor grade point average. His failure to get into college was due to a poor grade point average.

Allot or a lot?◦ Allot is a verb, A lot is used as an adjective to mean “many.”

Examples: The committee voted to allot $100 for prizes. A lot of students auditioned for roles in the musical.

Its or it’s?◦ Its is an irregular possessive. It’s is a contraction of it is.

Examples: Referring to the first-place ranking the coach said, “My players know its true worth.”

Players say it’s a long bus ride to most away games.

Bell work #20Directions: Write example sentences to demonstrate proper use of each.

accept and exceptallowed and aloudfurther and fartherhave and of loose and losepassed and pasttheir, there, and they’rethrough and threwthat, which, and who

Reminder: ◦ Label Bell work #20◦ 7-minute writing

Bell work # 21 Directions: Read the comments about writing style. Identify how having a consistent

manner of presentation benefits both news writers and readers. Why Learn AP Style? By Professor Mark Grabowski

You must know Associated Press style if you intend to get a job in the media or public relations.

Strictly following a particular usage style provides consistence, accuracy and clarity in grammar, punctuation and other language issues.

While some publications, such as the New York Times, have their own unique style, the vast majority of newspapers, magazines and press releases follow the rules of the AP Stylebook. AP style aims to be totally accurate, clear to anyone with a high school education and inoffensive (curse words are generally avoided, for example)- all while being as succinct as possible. Note that AP style differs significantly from style guides typically used in English classes, such as the APA and Oxford style guides.

Keep you AP Stylebook handy and refer to it often. You probably won’t be able to memorize everything inside the book, but you should at least remember common style issues… and be familiar enough with the book that you can look up other issues quickly when you’re writing on deadline.

Bell work #22 Names and Identification

The first time a person is named in a story, his or her complete first and last name along with some identifier should be used.

Faculty members are identified by position or subject taught, whichever is appropriate for the particular story. Titles can also indicate job, rank, or profession for example coach, principal, superintendent, nurse, counselor, athletic director, English teacher). Short titles precede names: “English teacher Laura Pearson” or basketball coach James Rogers.” Longer titles usually follow: “Mrs. Julie Barnett, treasurer of Florida FBLA-PBL Board”

Students are identified by class, year of graduation or some other method appropriate to the school ( senior Sarah Kind; Ian Macford, ’08; Bryon Dymond, 4)

Bell work #23 Numbers Spell out all approximate numbers and numerals up to and including nine except for

dates, scores, addresses, ages, time and money (about 2,000 are expected; Sep. 4, 2008; Ames, 14, 3 years old)

Do not begin a sentence with a number in figures; if a sentence must start with a number, it should be spelled out

Spell out ordinary numbers (sixty-sixth)

Do not use d, rd, st or th in writing dates 9 may 29, 2006; not May 29th,2006)

When two numbers are used together, avoid confusion by spelling out the first, whether the number I above or below nine ( fourteen 4-year-old children, not 14 4-year-old children)

In a list containing numbers below and above nine, use figures for all. ( Thos on the committee include 5 from GAA, 11 from Student Council, 3 from the French Club and 14 for the hall monitors)

For sums of money less than one dollar, use figures and word cents ( 10 cents, not $.10; 5 cents, not 5cts.).

Do not use the date when an event occurs within or close to the week of publication (Friday, next Friday, last Tuesday, tonight, yesterday).

For numbers of four or more digits, except serial number- house, telephone, pages, years- use a comma ( 4,945; 469, 958,000).

Bell work #24 Race or Ethnic Language

Identifying someone as a member of a minority group is done only when it is essential to the reader’s full understanding of the story. The decision to use racial, ethnic, religious or sexual orientation labels should be made only after careful consideration for their news values.

Minority groups of all kinds deserve to be identified, if there is a need to use such identification in the story, with labels acceptable to them and conforming to what is advocated by official groups representative of these minorities.

Racial, ethnic, religious or sexual orientation stereotypes, like male-female ones, should be eliminated from all writing, art and photography. Some of that bias is subtle and unintentional. ◦ For example, if you are doing a story about unmarried teenage mothers, it

would be wrong to cover, in words and photos, only those of certain racial or ethnic groups, since being unmarried and pregnant crosses all racial, ethnic and economic boundaries.

Bell work #25 Race or Ethnic Language

A good reporter needs to understand that some words are used within the community but once someone outside the community uses the words, they carry derogatory meanings. Other words such as barrio started as neutral descriptions but over time have suggested derogatory stereotypes and should be avoided.

Labels popular and acceptable in the past may not be today. For example, the term Negro was acceptable for media to use in the 1960s, but today black is used.

Acceptable labels for some of the major minority groups in the United States:◦ Asian-American◦ African-American or black◦ Native American or American Indian◦ Native Alaskan◦ Hispanic, Latino/Latina, Chicano, Chicana- although any one of these is

considered derogatory in certain regions◦ Pacific Islander◦ Gay ( male)◦ Lesbian ( female)◦ Homosexual

Bell work # 26 Screening Sexist Expression   What we say and write about men and women often reveals attitudes

toward sex roles that many persons find objectionable. Language does affect values, especially when we are speaking of persons who belong to groups other than our own. In general, our goal should be to avoid the use of words and phrases that directly or indirectly suggest limited opportunity for members of any groups, whether by sex, race, ethnic description or religion.

Gender-free terms should replace sex-designating terms

Change Mailman to mail carrier Fireman to fire fighter Policeman or policewoman to law enforcement official or police officer Newsman to newswoman to reporter Actor and actress to only actor Chairman to chairperson or chair

Bell work #27Marital Status, Appearance, Sexual

Stereotypes

◦ The appearance of a woman (or man) should not be described unless the description is essential for the story.

◦ A girl watching or male-watching tone – using words or phrases such as buxom, blonde or big hunk- should be avoided,

◦ Clichés and jokes at women’s or men’s expense such as woman driver or dumb jock should also be avoided.

Bell work #28Do not abbreviate

◦ Names of streets ( Eastwood Avenue, Central Street)◦ Title following a name ( Susan Ginsburg, professor of

history)◦ Days of the week◦ States when used without a city◦ Percent ( the symbol % should be used only in tabular

material or in headlines when used with a figure)◦ Positions when not used as titles (secretary, treasurer,

president)◦ Department (English Department) ◦ Christmas (not Xmas)

The year, except when used to identify students or alumni (2007; Libby Nelson, ’04)

◦ United States as a noun; it can be abbreviated as an adjective ( in the United States, but U.S. history)

Bell work #29 Italics

· Some publications use italics for names of books, long musical selections, plays and record albums and may use italics for names of newspapers, magazines and boats or ships. However, widely used AP style puts the names of books, long musical selections, plays and record albums in quotes and capitalizes the names of newspapers, magazines and boats and ships without any quotes of italics

· Words from other languages that have not become an accepted part of English (the meal was prepared a la francaise; Geoffrey’s goal is to graduate cum laude)

· A letter of the alphabet or a word used specifically as a word ( The word letter has two t’s in it)

· An editor’ s note to a story

· A word to be emphasized ( He repeated he had never been a candidate)

· Use italics for emphasis with caution. A reader ignores overused italics

Chapter 6: Writing a News Story

Read Chapter 6 p. 112-143Write Vocabulary on page 113 and

Vocabulary Flash Cards

Lecture and Activities PowerPoint Chapter 6

Leads and Inverted Pyramid NotesAssociated Press Style Top 10 ListCreating a Inverted Pyramid News Poster Creating a Inverted Pyramid Fairy Tale

◦ Example of Fairy Tale ArticlesInverted Pyramid ChecklistChapter 6 Handout Review

Inverted pyramid checklistWhen you write an inverted

pyramid news story, use the following checklist to make sure that you have done it correctly. Information should be presented in descending order of importance.

Leads◦one sentence◦20-35 words maximum◦lead tells the most important

information in the story and gives specific facts

Inverted Pyramid checklist continued…

Second paragraph◦ expand or develop some idea introduced in the lead◦ should not drop the story into a chronological narrative

Attribution◦ All major information should be attributed unless it is

commonly known or unless the information itself strongly implies the source.

◦ Don’t dump a string of direct quotations on the reader.◦ Direct quotations should be no more than two sentences

long.◦ Direct quotations and their attribution should be punctuated

properly. Here’s an example:“John did not go with her,” he said.

Elements of a direct quotation should be in the proper sequence, as in the example above: direct quote, speaker, verb.

Inverted Pyramid checklist continued…

AP styleAlways. Check numbers, dates, locations, titles, etc.

Check the following◦ pronoun-antecedent agreement◦ it, its, it’s◦ “it is . . .”, “there is . . .”, “there are . . .” structures; avoid

these. They are passive and vague.Use the past tense, not the present.Comma splice or run-on sentence, such as

He picked up the ball, he ran down the field.Sally does not know where he is he is not here.These are grammatically incorrect.◦ Plurals -- don’t make them by using an “apostrophe s”.

Inverted Pyramid checklist continued…Short paragraphs -- any paragraph

more than three sentences is definitely too long; any paragraph that is three sentences is probably too long.

Wordiness -- have you checked for too much verbiage, redundancies, unnecessary repetitions, etc.

Name, title -- When you put the title before a name, do not separate them with commas, such as ◦ (WRONG): Game warden, Brad Fisher,

arrested the trespassers.◦ When the name comes before the title, the

title should be set off by commas. Brad Fisher, the game warden, arrested the

trespassers.

Inverted Pyramid checklist continued…

Transitions -- use them to tie your paragraphs together. Don’t jump from one subject to another in a new paragraph without giving the reader some warning.

Don’t copy the wording of the information sheet.

Names -- check them once more to make sure they are spelled correctly.

The errors above are some of the most common that beginning writing students make in writing inverted pyramid news stories. Get into the habit of checking them on the story assignments that you get in your lab.

Review Chapter 6Identify the types of news leads and

their elementsWrite news leadsOrganize news storiesInverted PyramidsBe accurate and objectiveUse third person point of viewUse sentence length and structure

that are appropriate for journalistic writing

Use transitions

Reference SectionSchaffer, James, Randall

McCutcheon and Kathryn T. Stofer. Journalism Matters. Lincolnwood: Contemporary, 2001.

Bianchere, Amy, http://sites.google.com/site/mrsbiancheri.

http://www.jprof.com/writing/invertedpyramidchecklist.html