Issue 440 3rd June 2016

Join us in our tale

of how the Watling Street

came to be constructed

and how the

Roundabout came to

be invented.

STOP PRESS:

Workshops

restart in new

Library as from

6th June.

FLASH FICTION: half-baked, sedative, sliding, gateaux, generous,

intermittent, flummery, pocket, chocolate, algebra

Assignment: Where are we now?

A warm welcome awaits. COME to WORKSHOP ...

Rising Brook Library Workshops 2.00pm Monday (Not before 2.00)

Cover image

CMH

Lichfield Poets Group

(Venue: Kings Head, Bird Street, Lichfield)

How corrupt is too corrupt?

In a democracy with rules and regulations

designed to protect the fairness of the democratic

process, so that elections cannot be bought,

how far can rules

be bent before they are broken?

Isn‘t the internet a

wonderful looking

glass onto so many

aspects of public life

that prior to the

internet went on

unnoticed and

unreported?

So much

Skulduggery

committed by so

many crooks in high

places now

being exposed.

Having a blog and a

petition nowadays is

similar to being

a Regency

Pamphleteer.

www.issuu.com/risingbrookwriters

Have you ever noticed

how nice things right on

your doorstep are often

overlooked ...

For those seeking a

Day Out

just across the Stafford-

shire border on the way

to Market Drayton is this

12 acre garden created in

1939, when

Colonel Harry Clive

began the transformation

of a disused Victorian

quarry for his wife

Dorothy.

Today explorers of the a

garden will find a labur-

num arch, alpine scree

with pool, rose walk,

edible woodland, sea-

sonal borders and an ex-

tensive and magnificent

rhododendron filled

woodland with waterfall.

The garden has a contem-

porary informal, if in

places steep, setting.

(Bear in mind it is on the

side of a hill.)

Visitors can take a

breather in their tearoom

with its spectacular views

and enjoy delicious

homemade snacks: sand-

wiches, scones and cakes.

(Can vouch for the

scones, mine were

excellent!)

The Dorothy Clive

Garden is open every day

from 1st April to 30th Sep-

tember, 10am to 5.30pm and

then every weekend from the

start of October through to the

end of March 10am to 4pm.

5

Those hours that with gentle work did frame

The lovely gaze where every eye doth dwell

Will play the tyrants to the very same,

And that unfair which fairly doth excel:

For never-resting time leads summer on

To hideous winter and confounds him there,

Sap checked with frost and lusty leaves quite gone,

Beauty o'er-snowed and bareness every where:

Then were not summer's distillation left

A liquid prisoner pent in walls of glass,

Beauty's effect with beauty were bereft,

Nor it nor no remembrance what it was.

But flowers distilled though they with winter meet,

Leese but their show, their substance still lives sweet.

6

Then let not winter's ragged hand deface,

In thee thy summer ere thou be distilled:

Make sweet some vial; treasure thou some place,

With beauty's treasure ere it be self-killed:

That use is not forbidden usury,

Which happies those that pay the willing loan;

That's for thy self to breed another thee,

Or ten times happier be it ten for one,

Ten times thy self were happier than thou art,

If ten of thine ten times refigured thee:

Then what could death do if thou shouldst depart,

Leaving thee living in posterity?

Be not self-willed for thou art much too fair,

To be death's conquest and make worms thine heir.

http://www.gutenberg.org (educational/nfp usage)

This is from the workshop first days of plotting ...

Roman Britain: somewhere very near here on the, being constructed, Watling Street

Year 77AD early March so the grand opening is supposed to be on the 15th (it had to be, did-

n't it)

Trentbilious Fort (aka Gailey)

Site of work camp for building the Watling Street, an arterial road for troop marching ...

(Appinan 5 on their route map) Building has started in Deva (Chester) and at Londinium. The

two ends of the road are supposed to meet at Trentbilious – they don‘t – hence a roundabout

will be needed through the car park of the Spread Eagle pub. Two other roads going south east

are also supposed to join at this junction. It‘s a hub, a trading post. Lots of nefarious opportu-

nities. Trending: they all say ―Ciao‖ which is way out of timeline.

The Ninth legion have already started marching up from Londinium for the celebration and

games are to be held

Vicus: All the good positions are held by the totally corrupt Bluddschotticus family

Magistratus : Freedman Nigellos Bluddschotticus, he sub contracted out the road works hence

the grievous error in mapping, Viola Bluddschotticus, his shrew of a wife who wants Nigellos

to gain Plebeian Citizenship (grade three Roman Citizenship) at any cost

Bean counters: Titus Purcious and Teflonicus Maximus, Gias Velcrow (very simple scribe —

adopted by Titus‘s sister-in-law Angelica when found in a basket ... So, who is he?)

Boris Bluddschott (no icus) Brother of Nigellous, (Welsh) wife Blodwyn, dim and jealous,

son Bulch, lazy and hairy

Forum:

Soothesayer: Fortunata Agonyia Arntyous

Fort: Commander Fattassious Fatallis; Daftus Brushious (second in command)

Regional Commander/Senator Marpellious Domestios coming with the Ninth Legion to open

the joining of the roads

Guards: Pearmainus, Bacon Fryed, Hovis Brightus

Temple of Vespa: Vera and Gloria Vespals and keepers

of the sacred flame

Temple of Mother of Heaven: Isadora, High Priestess;

Galenodorius, Greek Doctor; Hilarious, Theatre Owner puts on

plays

Gladiators: Bresslorian, Glutinous Maximus and Flirticus

Traders: Collectus Alloto (scrap metal recycler)

Bathhouse Slaves: Smerkio and Flavia Exotica

Undertakers: Habeous and Corpus

Bertha Velcrow: madam, keeper of a seedy hotel—mother of

Angelica

Ancient Britons: Lurid Ashious and Floribunda

Druids: Aggrevious Wife and Daughter

Marcia of Mercia — Celtic group of waifs and slaves

NB Roman names are back to

front so a lot of these names will

need adjustment in the text

possibly ... probably ... or we

might not bother ...

STYLE SHEET READ THIS FIRST PLEASE BEFORE

SUBMITTING

We have decided to make some submission changes, to make it easier and fairer: There will be a pool of stock characters as usual. Contributors will be restricted to three exclusive characters of their own making per plot strand. Contributors must not use any other contributor‟s exclusive characters. Contributors must have a plotline approved before starting. Contributors may only submit 500 words per week. Block submissions will not be accepted. It is important to other writers to be able to hear storylines unfolding week by week. The page limit of the book aims to be 150 pages. The house font is Tahoma 12pt - no tables, no bold, no italics, no col-oured inks, no centred headings, „ for speech not “ , no underlining, no attachments, all submissions in ragged-right-edge embedded email, all submissions to be spelled checked and grammar checked prior to submission. One space only after a full stop. All contributors should ac-quaint themselves how to punctuate dialogue. A Buddy system, where a beginner may be asking the advice of a more experienced contributor prior to submission, is to be encouraged. NB: It has been agreed for workshoppers to go on a field trip to study a Roman dig site.

Life and letters on the Roman Frontier. (Researcxh NP) It is the book of wooden letters found at Vindolandia. They say things like 'you are invited to my party', 'it is cold and wet please send socks', 'shopping lists and prices for bacon and lard'. It also contains lots of personal names that we can use. An online Latin dictionary. Latin Dictionary and Grammar Resources - Latdict An idiots guide to Roman society etc. Ancient Rome Watling Street, a Roman road in England ran from Dover west-northwest to London and thence northwest via Saint Albans (Verulamium) to Wroxeter (Ouirokónion, or Viroconium). It was one of Britain’s greatest arterial roads of the Roman and post-Roman periods. The name came from a group of Anglo-Saxon settlers who called Verulamium by the name of Wætlingaceaster. This local name passed to the whole of the Roman road (Wæclinga stræt) by the 9th century Roman roads and surveying: https://explorable.com/roman-roads Wroxeter: http://www.english-heritage.org.uk/visit/places/wroxeter-roman-city/ Wroxeter has a modern reconstruction of a Roman Villa. AND my favourite bit ,the Vinyard: http://www.wroxetervineyard.co.uk/

Research: Avete Omnes [That‘s about ALL the Latin you‘re getting so make the most of it.]

As we‘ve chosen to do a carry-on-claudius I‘ve been thinking – it was painful - about a couple of the characters.

Then I thought, ‘Why shouldn‘t I spread the misery? Tell everyone about it.‘

For better or worse here‘s the outcome.

Habeus et Corpus

This is merely how I see them. Character building needed.

They could, possibly should, be 'free use' characters, but should you want to take them over please feel free to do so. I'm not

claiming them, as I haven't thought a plot line through yet.

There's a sign painted on the side of a building in the Vicus, it says:-

Gnaeus Musius Habeus and his, none identical, twin brother Gnaeus Musius Corpus [Roman names are backwards] are the local

'Del Boys'. Although they are into lots of low status things, they aren't good at any of them and often end up on the wrong side of

what passes for the law.

Corpus is the tall skinny one with flat feet, little hair and is a good cook when his wife doesn't feel like doing it; which is

more or less all the while.

HABEUS et CORPUS Bros.

Undertakers & Party Arrangers.

Musician, Mutes, Mourners, Flute girls & Clowns supplied to order.

Firewood, Fine Furniture and Food delivery.

House clearance agents.

Enquiry experts.

Auctioneers

Political Agents.

Gardeners and Builders.

Recycled clothing and footwear supplier.

Satisfaction Guaranteed!!

Habeus is the fat one, a bit idle, but strong and is the main worker. He fancies himself a 'Stand up Philoso-

pher' [comedian] but his jokes are rubbish. Swanning about in a toga isn't one of his good points either.

-----

ALL the jobs noted are low to very low status and, although they are Roman Citizens, they are of the 3rd class [Plebs]. ,

Musician, Mutes, Mourners, Flute girls & Clowns supplied to order – in theory all good for the undertaking trade and the party

business, It's just that the employees and slaves are a sorry lot of rejects.

Firewood, Fine Furniture and Food delivery – there may not be much difference between the fine furniture and the firewood,

or, come to that, any of them.

House clearance agents – did not exist.

Enquiry experts – Private detectives? Bottom of the heap!

Auctioneers – Another name for dodgy types [who also did ‗house clearances‘.]

Political Agents – part time only.

Gardeners and Builders – Slave jobs.

Recycled clothing and footwear supplier – The Victorian term ―Shonky shop‖ gives the idea, although the term

‗Patcher's‘ [dog rough translation] may be better.

Satisfaction Guaranteed!! - Fat chance!

NB. The term ‗Flute girl‘ may also be applied to ‗Ladies of Negotiable Affection.‘

A word of warning – steady there it can only get worse. I‘m also planning on doing a bit of an outline of the fort & the types

there. All in English I promise you, so that we‘re all singing from the same hymn sheet.

CMH

(Editor : It should be noted for all his amusing anecdotes CMH is a roman historian and roman re-enactor ... His Latin ain‘t

too shoddy either ... )

FIELD TRIP RESEARCH:

Wroxeter As we‘ve chosen to do the roman theme I thought I may

share this with you. I took the pictures in 2012 so they‘re

dated.

Triclinium.

Three couches and two circular tables.

[ignore the blocks they‘re just to keep them out of the wet]

They need cushions and a ‗Throw‘ over them.

Bedroom

A bed like those in Herculaneum

There should be a chest in here but it had been removed to the

bathhouse to dry out.

Study [or whatever]

Empty [other than these Pila used to illustrate how the hypo-

caust worked]

Bath house

Empty.

The plunge pool room could do with a statue [painted] in the

niche to turn it into a nymphaeum.

Monday: The Bean Counter‟s Office – A wattle and daub hut with a curtain door in the Vicus.

Our story opens with Teflonicus, who was poring over a scroll, shaking his head.

„How much, this time?‟ asked Titus Percious his mouth set as tight as a cut in best liver. The under slave shivered: „Too much. We‟ll never be able to hide a loss of this magnitude.‟

Teflonicus was starting to sweat. „Bluddschotticus has way over spent on the games.‟ „Ahh... the games,‟ sighed Titus. „All part of his master plan.‟ „Roman Citizenship?‟

„Nay, numskull, Plebeian ... What that Freedman wouldn‟t do to please „er-in-doors.‟ Both men shuddered. Viola Bluddschotticus had that affect on mere mortals.

„He‟ll bankrupt the whole province at this rate. Anything to curry favour with Marpellius.‟ „Grovel to the regional Senator, oh yes, without a second thought about paying the legion‟s

wages.‟

„It‟s those two Gladiators. All the way from Roma.‟ „All the way from Londinium, but his geography is suspect.‟ This truth was not lost on either

men. It was Nigellous Bluddschotticus who was, amongst other things, the architect for “the road”.

„Who‟s counting? Most of the Vicus can‟t read the posters.‟ „Let‟s hope they can‟t do sums, either.‟ „Where‟s he accommodating these Gladiators?‟

„Bertha Velcrow‟s establishment, of course.‟ „What? That den of iniquity beside the Temple of Vespa, the one next to the Forum. Its prices

are scandalous ... erm ... so I‟m told.‟ „Best pizza in town,‟ grinned Teflonicus. „Besides, he‟ll get a discount, he‟s a good customer.‟

At this point there was a sneeze. Both men stared at the corner table where their forgotten scribe, Gias Velcrow, was scribbling away on a scroll.

„Gias, my boy, what are you doing?‟

„Minutes, uncle. Writing down conversations like you told me to.‟ Titus covered the floor of beaten mud in two paces and tore the scroll into scraps which he

then threw on to the tiny brazier which was meanly doing its best to fill their shack with smoke without divesting itself of any heat. Britain in early March can be dreadful.

„By all the Household Gods do you want to get us all killed?‟ muttered Teflonicus as he strode

outside to gasp a breath of fresh country air, not that there was much freshness about the Vicus that morning where they were slaughtering pigs. He did notice a lot of soldier types rushing about

in their hob-nailed sandals which was a bit strange for those lazy beggars, but then his attention was caught by the sight of their two Vespals on the way to the market in the Forum, so it wasn‟t

until much later that it occurred to him to wonder how much else that dozy scribe, Gias, had duly recorded for posterity, and where were these incriminating scrolls.

NOTE: Three exclusive characters, shows there is a big problem and several

smaller ones, dialogue driven, ends with a question. Word count. under 500.

The Bathhouse http://www.english-heritage.org.uk/visit/places/wroxeter-roman-city/things-to-do/#Section1

Workshoppers are planning a Field Trip to visit the dig site of Wroxeter Roman City which is

near Shrewsbury. Wroxeter will be the format for the fictional Fort which grew into a city called Tentbilious which is the base for the new comedy. RBW will be hiring a minibus and

there will be an entrance fee to pay of £5.30 for concessions (i.e. Over 60s).

Workshoppers will have the opportunity to explore where the Roman townsfolk met to wash,

exercise and socialise. Built to inspire awe, in its prime Wroxeter's bathhouse was enormous. Evidence remains of the basilica which was a vast open hall, providing space to exercise and relax before going into the baths. There are extensive walls still standing.

Workshoppers will be visiting the reconstructed Roman Town House to gain some insight into Roman domestic life. The English Heritage site is open seven days a week 10.00am until

6.00pm.

Weeds And Other Pests.

Unfortunately, with all the problems that people are having at the moment and also

with the spell of wet weather, many of the allotments are looking more than a little

abandoned at the moment and weeds are growing and seeding everywhere. With all

these seeds about my plot did start to weed up after only a week or twos neglect.

Fortunately, although the wet conditions encourage the weeds to grow quickly, the

wet also softens the soil making digging easy and sometimes the weeds can just be

pulled out. This has meant that my new brick built compost heap which I con-

structed right next to my Runner Bean canes and a patch of Cauliflowers, soon

filled up with weeds. As with all compost heaps it has attracted lots of insect life

and other creepy crawlies including lots of snails and slugs. Not the best of things

to do next to a patch of Cauliflowers as I found out to my cost! Clearing all the

weeds, dead leaves and other rubbish from around the plants, leaving just bare soil,

has reduced the problem a little, but when I weeded, I made sure not to loosen the

soil too close to the plants as they like firm soil. In future though, I will make sure

that anything susceptible to slug damage is planted well away from the compost

heap!

Compost heaps should be turned occasionally, but that does not appear to be what

other allotment holders are doing. One said to me that he just keeps putting stuff in

the top, the level keeps falling and he never has to empty it. This could be true to

some extent as plant material is made up of nearly all water, the gasses, Oxygen

and Carbon Dioxide and various other Carbon compounds that will all readily turn

back into gasses. That means that he is not doing his bit by locking Carbon up in

his compost that could have been dug into his plot as Humus. By turning your heap

you will kill the weeds growth potential, but not decompose them to far. My own

heap has been partly dug out, turned and refilled already and is due for some more

attention.

The total destruction of weeds to virtually nothing can easily be seen when you hoe

them in sunny, dry conditions. An early morning hoe will result in dead weeds by

night time and after a day or two there will be no trace of them. It is best to hoe any

small weeds in dry conditions rather than dig, because digging dry soil too much

breaks up the crumb structure and turns the soil to dust.

We have a female Blackbird on the allotments that is as tame as any Robin. When-

ever you start to dig, whether it is weeding or just planting, she is never far away. If

you lean on your fork and pause for a little breather she often comes up to your fork

in her search for a tasty morsel. The only problem is that being a Blackbird she also

likes berries and has found my precious, first few Josta Berries, that were ripening

nicely! She obviously prefers the berries to slugs and snails as well! On the subject

of Josta Berries, whenever I have spoken of them before people haven‘t heard of

them and say they can‘t track down any reference to them. Well, I recently found

them in the Black Currant section of one of the popular series of gardening books

that deals with fruit. It clearly states that they are not a Black Currant variety, but

are a cross with a Gooseberry and I guess they are because Gooseberry Sawfly that

I have never seen on them before, has attacked one of my young plants making lace curtains

out of the leaves!

Apart from slugs attacking my Cauliflowers, we are getting plenty of Cabbage White butter-

flies. Many plot-holders are covering their plants with fleece cloches, but I have tried using a

spray. Of course it had to be a not so effective, Garlic/Soap spray as we are supposed to be an

environmentally friendly site and no chemicals are allowed to be used. Last year my Carrots

were disfigured by Carrot Root Fly, so this year I tried ―Companion Planting,‖ by putting rows

of Onions and Garlic next to them. The smell of the Onions is supposed to deter the Carrot Fly

and the Carrots deter the Onion Fly. Next year I might have a few more ideas for natural deter-

rents because I found a book that goes into great detail about ―Companion Planting,‖ to pre-

vent pests without using any chemicals at all for anything. We are all discovering new methods

and ideas for doing things all the time and half the fun is in trying to outwit Mother Nature!

Wikipedia image

30May: Folkystuff roundup Written on May 30, 2016 By Garry Copeland

SO MANY people turned up for the launch of Peter Bran-

son‘s latest book at the New Vic in Newcastle-under-

Lyme that the proceedings had to be moved to a bigger

area of the theatre.

Hopefully for Peter, a similar event he‘s organised in

Stafford this week will attract matching enthusiasm.

His new collection of poems and songs, Hawk Rising,

will be spotlighted on Thursday at Gainsborough [art]

works‘ Life of Riley Cafe, St. Patrick‘s Street.

Peter will be reading and singing selections from the

book, supported by Small Change and singer-songwriter

Helena Francesca. Floor singers will be welcome, too.

IT LOOKS as if Vicky Evans‘s search for a regular home

for her Irish folk and blues night is over. Last Sunday‘s

session upstairs at the Royal Oak, Gnosall, convinced her

that the pub is the right venue for her monthly hootenanny.

―The room is ideal and the people who run the pub are

really welcoming and friendly,‖ says Vicky.

SMALL CHANGE will be hosting their monthly Sit ‗n‘

Listen open mic night on Friday, featuring as usual some

of the best guest performers on the Stafford acoustic scene.

The session is held at the County Staff Club in Eastgate

Street, where the real ale is excellent, the staff are friendly

and admission is free.

Proceeds from a raffle fund occasional professional

guest nights, the next one being in July.

This week‘s diary

Unless otherwise stated, sessions begin at around 8pm, but

don‘t be surprised if things don‘t warm up nearer 9pm.

Monday

The Elms, Church Road, Shareshill, 8.30pm. Christine

Edwards hosts a singers‘ night which offers a warm wel-

come to all-comers. Contemporary, country and occasional

traditional. Friendly landlord Kevin provides free sand-

wiches.

Granville‘s, Granville Square, Stone, 8.30pm. Singer Paul

Walker hosts a weekly anything goes acoustic open-mic

night at this popular restaurant.

Tuesday

Spittal Brook, Lichfield Road, Stafford. The home of Staf-

ford‘s longest-running session. Originally strictly tradi-

tional, but nowadays pretty much anything goes. Good

range of real ales.

Wednesday

Rose and Crown, Eastgate Street, Stafford. Amicable ses-

sion in a great town centre venue, hosted by the Spring

Chickens. Can be noisy (it‘s a pub – what do you ex-

pect?), but there are few better ways to enjoy an eve-

ning among friends.

Thursday

Gainsborough [art]works, Life of Riley Cafe, St. Pat-

rick‘s Street, Stafford, ST16 2PL, 7pm-9pm. Stafford

launch of Peter Branson‘s Hawk Rising (see above).

The Roebuck, Hilderstone. A bit far out, but well

worth the trip for both the music (courtesy of Ant and

Andy, Albert, Gary etc) and splendid free grub.

Market Vaults, Stafford. Bluesman Pete Wearn‘s

open-mic session at this popular town centre pub (just

off Market Square) isn‘t strictly folk, but folkies are

welcome. Banjo ace Dan Walsh cut his performing

teeth here, which should be recommendation enough.

Brewood Acoustic Music Club, Brewood Cricket

Club, Four Ashes Road, Brewood. Friendly open mic

session. Full details: brewoodacousticmusic.co.uk/

whats-on-4

Friday

County Staff Club, Eastgate Street, Stafford. Sit ‗n‘ Lis-

ten.

Bradford Arms Folk Club, Ivetsey Bank, near Wheaton

Aston, 8.30pm. Performers‘ night hosted by Helen

Brown. Call 07590 220739 to book your spot.

Coming soon

June 6. Pistol Pete Wearn, album launch, MET studio,

Gatehouse Theatre, Eastgate Street, Stafford.

http://www.pistolpetewearn.co.uk/

June 28. Jonathan Byrd and Pickup Cowboy, MET stu-

dio, Gatehouse Theatre, Eastgate Street, Stafford.

http://www.fishrecords.co.uk/roster/jonathanbyrd.html

All That Jazz! The RBW workshop comedy for 2016 is now online as a free e-book. www.issuu.com/risingbrookwriters

www.risingbrookwriters.org.uk/DynamicPage.aspx?PageID=15 and on RBW Facebook page where it is free to

like and share

FREE TICKETS TO SEE OTHELLO, COMPETITION: Stafford Gatehouse Theatre, is giving away free tickets to this year's Stafford Festival Shakespeare production, Othello. To be in with the chance of winning, entrants must embrace their lyrical inventiveness and tweet their best made up word or phrase in the style of the Bard to @Staff_Gatehouse using the hashtag #StaffsBard. Stafford Gatehouse Theatre will be giving away two free tickets every week in June to the creator of the most inventive new word or phrase. Wordsmiths must submit their work with a brief definition. To commemorate the 400th anniversary of the death of England's most celebrated playwright, SFS is back under the battlements of Stafford castle for a festival debut performance of the popular tragedy, Othello. Set in 1950s Cyprus, the play takes its theme from Britain's bloody occupation of the island. Authen-tic period uniforms combined with the artistic vision of BAFTA nominated set designer, Francis Col-lier, are sure to make it a performance not to be missed. "William Shakespeare is credited with coining over 1,700 words and phrases that are still in common use today," explained SFS Producer Derrick Gask. "He had an incredible knack for creating powerful imagery through metaphors, similes and even splicing words together. It's this kind of creativity we'd really like to see on our Twitter feed!" The competition opens on June 1, 2016, and will run up to June 30. The lucky winner will be chosen at the end of each week and contacted via Twitter. For about the competition and for the full terms and conditions please email gatehouse@staffordbc.gov.uk. Othello opens on Thursday 23rd June and runs until Saturday 9th July 2016. Tickets can be booked by calling the box office on 01785 619080 or by visiting www.staffordfestivalshakespeare.co.uk.

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