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Ideal Man for a Woman

What a woman finds Attractive in a man

The Astrology of Attraction

Astrology can offer us a few clues as to what types of people men andwomen are attracted to. What follows is a simplistic model for determiningthe "ideal" man for a woman.

The position of Mars in a woman's chart, by sign.

We at Cafe Astrology tend to shy away from some of the traditional

"rules" of attraction. Traditionally, astrologers have interpreted theposition and condition of Venus in the natal chart differently depending onthe gender of the native. The reason for treating Venus in men's andwomen's chart differently is based on the idea that women may tend to"disown" the qualities of Mars in her own chart. Since the energies of Mars have to go somewhere, when a woman doesn't "own", or identifywith, her Mars, the energies would be projected onto the men he meetsand relates with. Similarly, men are thought to more easily relate to and

"own" Mars qualities. The concept of projection is an interesting and validone. However, while it may hold true with Mars to some extent today, weprefer not to attach gender bias to Venus and Mars. In our experience,men and women tend to take on the role of Venus in their relationships inapproximately equal measure.

However, the position of Mars by sign in a woman's chart does tend tooffer some clues as to what she will find attractive in a man. This is

because Mars reveals what turns us on to some degree, and representstraditionally masculine qualities. (Venus helps to round out the picture interms of sexual attraction and style). If you don't know the sign position of Mars, look it up in these tables--all you need is a birth date!

If a woman's Mars is in Aries , she is often attracted to a strong,independent, and forthright man, perhaps athletic in appearance, but

more importantly, direct, confident, and straightforward. Ultra sensitive or shy men are not usually the most attractive men to these women, as theytend to prefer strong and independent types. Men who don't beat around

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the bush, who state what they want, and who display a certain level of confidence are ideal.

If a woman's Mars is in Taurus , she is often attracted to men whopossess a stable, secure, and very strong aura about them. Meat-and-potatoes types are definitely these women's "cup of tea". Unstable, overlyintellectual, or "flaky" men are simply not what these women would define"real men". These women like their men simple to please, traditionallymasculine, and strong. They often are especially turned on by men whowork with their hands (as opposed to "suits"), men who can build things,and sexually simple but sensual men.

If a woman's Mars is in Gemini , intelligence ranks very high on her list of ideal qualities in a man. An athletic or tomboyish look, sometimes on theslim side, is often preferred. Wittiness is a huge turn-on for these women.Versatility, liveliness, and playfulness are qualities in men that thesewomen find devastatingly attractive. They're not especially impressed withwhat they might consider "less evolved" types of men who display moretypical, or traditional, masculine traits. Depressed or boring types won'tdo. These women want to be stimulated, and their brains are their biggestsexual organs.

If a woman's Mars is in Cancer , she may prefer the "sensitive type" of man who is compassionate, sensitive, and protective. These womensometimes are attracted to temperamental sorts, finding moodiness in aman rather intriguing. They want men with "layers" (remember Shrek?).However, they are not into the type of "sensitive" men that Mars in Pisceswomen are most attracted to. In fact, they generally want men who arestrong and traditionally masculine. Generally, these women prefer menwho are physically strong or at least look that way--remember that theylove to feel protected.

If a woman's Mars is in Leo , she may be attracted to men who are proud,outgoing, and perhaps even gaudy. Aloofness or a dignified, confidentaura is usually appealing to these women. These women are moreinclined to enjoy men who possess a rather bold, confident manner--andstyle! Playfulness and fun are very important to these women, and theuptight type or overly serious man is not going to do it for them.Stinginess is a huge turn-off, too. These women want their mengenerous, dignified, and confident. These women do want their men to be

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a little possessive and jealous, as it makes them feel more alive, wanted,and attractive.

If a woman's Mars is in Virgo , an appealing man to her is usually anunderstated, rather simple appearance without too much glamour or ostentatiousness. Healthy, natural, and clean are most appealing physicalqualities, and a certain amount of intelligence as well as a modest,sensible approach to life. These women are turned off by men who areoverly confident, bossy, or unkind. They are looking for perceptive menwho are kind and helpful. Competency is important, but these womenaren't big on men who are show-offs. A quietly competent aura is best.

If a woman's Mars is in Libra , she is most attracted to men withunderstated charm, good manners, and a pleasing and balancedappearance. Coarseness or rudeness is often a turn-off, and so isindependence! These women prefer men who are cooperative and whoare willing to please. Romantic men are a huge turn-on, and thesewomen truly appreciate classy sorts.

If a woman's Mars is in Scorpio , a complicated, dark, powerful, andpassionate man is the biggest turn-on. This woman wants a man with"layers"--one who has depth and is complicated enough to intrigue her.She is especially attracted to men who ooze sensuality, who are perhapsa little dark and mysterious (even brooding), and who have a magneticand powerful aura. Intensity is a turn-on for these women--flighty,superficial, and indifferent types need not apply! These women generallydo enjoy a certain level of possessiveness in a man

If a woman's Mars is in Sagittarius , she is most impressed with a manwho is playful, fun, intelligent, and honest. An energetic, happy aura in aman is often most appealing. Joking around is a must, and a huge turn-onfor these women! They want to have a good time, and to have longconversations with their men as well. They are not especially attracted tomen who are overly groomed, generally don't like too much "decoration"or men who put on airs. A tousled, casual appearance is just fine withthese women--in fact, it's preferred. A man's status is not of huge interestto these women--they are looking for honest guys whose egos aren't tiedup in what they do for a living or how they look.

If a woman's Mars is in Capricorn , she is generally attracted to competentmen, perhaps well-established business types or otherwise accomplished

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men. She doesn't necessarily go for status, but she does want a man whohas an aura of competence about him. She is looking for a certain level of security, and is unimpressed with men who are drifters, irresponsible, or flighty. A stable, directed man with goals in life and a responsible, evenserious, attitude to life is important to this woman.

If a woman's Mars is in Aquarius , she can be most impressed by menwho are somewhat unconventional or kooky in their choice of clothes andoverall style. She wants an interesting man. He can certainly behandsome, but boring? Hardly. A man with a brain is important, althoughshe won't be attracted to a brainy type. Somebody who is perceptive, alittle unconventional, and perhaps somewhat aloof is most attractive.Rigid or boring types simply won't do.

If a woman's Mars is in Pisces , she is often impressed with a man who issensitive, compassionate, and intriguingly complicated. Lacking inconfidence is just fine, and so is a touch of helplessness. A "starvingartist" type may be appealing, or a man who is downtrodden in some way,as these women enjoy men who have a distinct soft side. The strong,independent types are not turn-ons for these women.