Document

Founded i n 1949 The Newspaper of Imperial College Union

QEC Merger

A fourth CCU?

In a statement issued on Wednesday, the joint working party

set up to examine closer collaboration between Imperial

College and Queen Elizabeth College recommended that the

colleges should form an "association with the intent of a

merger at a later date".

T h e w o r k i n g party was set up about one month ago a n d has met

regularly d u r i n g November . T h e proposals are presented in the form of

a draft for discussion w i t h i n the colleges. N o decision w i l l be taken unt i l

ful l consultations have taken place.

T h e m a i n theme of the proposal is that Q E C should be incorporated

into I C as a fourth constituent college. T h e bioscience part of Q E C is

proposed to be physical ly moved to the I C site, w h i c h w o u l d require a

new b u i l d i n g (probably on the site next to new Chemistry ) . T h e

phys ica l sciences at Q E C wou ld be "a c commodate d elsewhere w i t h i n

the un ivers i ty " .

J o i n t p l a n n i n g and consultative committees are to be set up to

achieve a closer w o r k i n g relat ionship pr ior to the eventual merger. T h e

timescale of the proposal is approx imate ly five years, but major

developments might be expected before that t ime.

T h e proposal is in response to the problems of finance and student

numbers facing L o n d o n Univers i ty . It is not clear however just what

financial savings w i l l be made, and no ment ion is made of this in the

statement. Student numbers w o u l d presumably fal l , a l though the new

'super I C w o u l d be larger than it is now.

A petition cal l ing lor an Emergency U G M to discuss the matter was

received in the U n i o n Office yesterday. The External Affairs Committee

is meeting at 5:45pm on Tuesday, December 8 in the U n i o n Office to draft,,

a motion to the emergency U G M

Rag Mag Reprieve I C U ' s R a g M a g is once again

a v a i l a b l e a f ter last T u e s d a y ' s

L J G M d e c i d e d to o v e r t u r n a

previous decision b a n n i n g it.

T h e meeting opened shortly

a f ter 1 : 00p m w i t h a b o u t 400

people in the Great H a l l .

M r N'ick M o r t o n , I C U Pres i

dent, ta lked at length d u r i n g his

r e p o r t a b o u t t h e p r o p o s e d

merger w i t h Q E C , and how he

had managed to appease Col lege .

M r Barney M c C a b e , D e p u t y

President, in his j o v i a l manner ,

took his trousers d o w n , and then

expla ined his enjoyment equa

t i o n . T h i s w a s g r e e t e d w i t h

applause, p r o v i n g that he can be

quite wit ty in flashes.

T h e H o n S e c , M r M a r c o

L e d w o l d , h a d his r e p o r t a c

cepted.

T h e mot ion on Princess A n n e ,

concern ing her attendance at a

m a u l i n g of a buffalo by a tiger,

was passed.

T h e mot ion on the R a g M a g

was considered next. Because of a

U G M d e c i s i o n l a s t s e s s i o n

r e s t r i c t i n g d i s c u s s i o n o f a n y

m a t t e r to o n c e a t e r m , the

mot ion contained clauses over

c o m i n g t h i s d i I f i c u l t ) ' . A l t e r

m u c h procedura l wranglings a n d

a futile attempt to force a paper

ballot , it was finally decided to

permit the R a g M a g ' s p u b l i c a

t ion to students only. M r Patr i ck

C o l l , R a g M a g E d i t o r , t o l d

F E L I X later that he was happy

wi th the decision.

C o l l e g e

to t a k e

b l a c k s

w i t h o u t

A - l e v e l s

College

reacts to

Scarman

Report

Daily Mail, Monday.

Imperial College has taken up the call by Lord Scarman for

positive discrimination in favour of Britain's under privileged

ethnic minorities.

In a n artic le in M o n d a y ' s Daily Mail L o r d Flowers said that he

expected about six special students a year to be taken on for degree

courses, start ing next October . These w i l l be people who are unable ,

through no fault of their own or lack of ab i l i ty , to qual i fy for a place at

Imper ia l . " T h e y might have some mediocre A L e v e l passes or they

might not have any A Levels at a l l . W e have carefully not talked about

colour, but c learly it is a scheme to benefit black students from places

l ike N o t t i n g H i l l a n d B r i x t o n . W e are go ing some way towards

correct ing the lack of privi lege some students have had in the past , " he

said.

A l t h o u g h the Col lege has been t h i n k i n g for some time of ways to

help people who normal ly w o u l d be unl ike ly to get i n , the S c a r m a n

R e p o r t has obviously prec ipitated developments to get the Col lege to

" d o their b i t " .

L o r d Flowers said that he hoped the move w o u l d encourage other

universities to carry out s imi lar schemes for depr ived ch i ldren .

Col lege Secretary J o h n S m i t h said " B u t we're not l ook ing for token

blacks or a n y t h i n g l ike that. W e don't need them. W e want to try and

take up what L o r d S c a r m a n said a n d try to do something positive

about i t . "

No. 599 Friday, December

Dear Sir

P r o f e s s o r H a r t l e y ' s R C S

C e n t e n a r y l e c t u r e e n t i t l e d

' ' R C S L e a d s I n t o B i o t e c h n o l

o g y last T h u r s d a y i l l u s t r a t e d

a number o f aspects o f th i s

e x c i t i n g field i n w h i c h s e v e r a l

d e p a r t m e n t s o f the C o l l e g e

a r e i n v o l v e d . T h e presence o f

a n e x e c u t i v e f r o m the n e w

B r i t i s h b i o t e c h n o l o g y c o m

p a n y C e l t e c h w a s a n i n d i c a

t i o n o f i n d u s t r y ' s n e w f o u n d

a n d h i g h l y jus t i f i ed e n t h u s i

a s m for the n e w t e c h n o l o g y .

T h e I m p e r i a l C o l l e g e

p r o s p e c t u s c l e a r l y states that

the c e n t r a l f u n c t i o n o f o u r

C o l l e g e is to serve i n d u s t r y .

T h i s s h o u l d be a c c o m p l i s h e d

b y d i r e c t l y s o l v i n g c u r r e n t

p r o b l e m s o r c r e a t i n g n e w

a r e a s o f b a s i c k n o w l e d g e .

Pro fessor H a r t l e y was c a r e f u l

to p o i n t o u t t h e g r o w i n g l i n k s

b e t w e e n i n d u s t r y a n d b i o

l o g i s t s . W h a t h e f a i l e d t o

m e n t i o n w a s that he is c u r

r e n t l y n e g o t i a t i n g the sale o f

o n e o f t h e C o l l e g e s " m o s t

v a l u a b l e resources to i n d u s t r y

(see last w e e k ' s ,\ew Scientist).

T h o s e i n the field rea l i se

that the possession b y I m p e r i a l

C o l l e g e o f a n e x c e l l e n t

f e r m e n t a t i o n p i l o t p l a n t g ives

us the a b i l i t y to t r u l y l e a d i n

b i o t e c h n o l o g y . T h e n e w

c o m p a n i e s a l so sec the n e e d

for s u c h a f a c i l i t y . It seems

l i k e l y t h a t i n d u s t r i a l m o n e y

w i l l s h o r t l y b e g i n to H o o d i n t o

the t o i l e r s o f the p i l o t p l a n t

i r r e s p e c t i v e o f w h o o w n s i t .

T h e d i s a d v a n t a g e s o f i n d u s

t r i a l o w n e r s h i p o f the p i l o t

p l a n t a r e c l e a r . T h e C o l l e g e

e f f e c t ive ly loses c o n t r o l . B a s i c

r e s e a r c h w i l l u n d o u b t e d l y

s u f f e r a n d r e s e a r c h e r s w i l l

i n e v i t a b l y be f o rced to the

b a c k o f t h e q u e u e , w h i l s t

t h e r e a r e u n d o u b t e d l y s ome

s h o r t t e r m a d v a n t a g e s o l

i n d u s t r i a l o w n e r s h i p s u c h as

i n v e s t m e n I c a p i t a l a n d

d y n a m i c c o m m e r c i a l m a n a g e

m e n t , the l o n g t e r m effects

w i l l i n e v i t a b l y be d a m a g i n g .

T h e p r i n c i p l e o f s e l l i n g

p r o f i t a b l e c h u n k s o f u n i v e r

sit ies o i l to i n d u s t r y is i n i tse l f

a d a n g e r o u s one . ( l i v e n the

r ight sort o f m a n a g e m e n t I

a m s u r e the S o u t h s i d e H a l l s

c o u l d he a n i m m e n s e l y p r o f i t

a b l e h o t e l !

I s i n c e r e l y h o p e the C o l l e g e

a u t h o r i t i e s w i l l s e r i o u s l y

c o n s i d e r the l u l l i m p l i c a t i o n s

be fore t a k i n g s u c h a d a n g e r

ous step.

] Ours

N i c k G r e e n

B o t a n y

Dear Mark

Is M r H i c k s t r y i n g to p u l l

t h e w o o l o v e r o u r eyes c o n

c e r n i n g the p r i c i n g o f books i n

I C B o o k s h o p ? T h e B o o k s h o p

M a n a g e r s t a l e d i n his l e t t e r to

F E L I X last w e e k t h a t " T h e

p r i c e o f a b o o k is sel b y the

p u b l i s h e r s ; b y l a w , the B o o k

s h o p has to se l l it at that

p r i c e . " T h i s is o n l y t r u e l o r

"net" b o o k s .

I f a b o o k h a s a p r i c e

p r i n t e d o n i t , o r a p r i c e s t i c k er

p l a c e d o n it b y the p u b l i s h e r ,

t h e n i l is r e f e r r e d to as a " n e t "

a n d m u s t be s o l d at the s tated

p r i c e . A b o o k s h o p m a k e s it

p r o f i t o n " n e t " b o o k s b y

r e c e i v i n g a d i s c o u n t o n the

net p r i c e f r o m the p u b l i s h e r s ,

w h i c h c a n be as h i g h as 4 0 %

(i.e u p to 4 0 % o f w h a t y o u p a y

w o u l d go to t h e b o o k s h o p ) .

H o w e v e r , t h e r e is a lso a

class o f b o o k r e f e r r e d to as

" n o n - n e t " . T h e s e u s u a l l y

h a v e n o p r i c e p r i n t e d o n t h e m

b y the p u b l i s h e r , a n d i f a

b o o k h a s a p r i c e itril/en

i n s i d e the c o v e r i n p e n c i l t h e n

it is m o r e t h a n l i k e l y a " n o n -

n e t " book . I n g e n e r a l , ' " n o n -

n e t " books t e n d l o be e d u c a

t i o n a l / t e x t books a n d there

fore m a n y t e x t b o o k s r e q u i r e d

b y I C s t u d e n t s c o m e u n d e r

t h e " n o n - n e t " c a t a g o r y

( p a r t i c u l a r l y " s t u d e n t e d i

t i o n s " ) . T h e d i s c o u n t received

b y b o o k s h o p s f r o m the p u b

l i s h e r o n the " n o n - n e t " p r i c e

is u s u a l l y m u c h l o w e r t h a n l o r

" n e t " b o o k s , a n d w h i l e I was

w o r k i n g l o r a firm o f b o o k

c o n t r a c t s ( w h o r u n a n u m b e r

o f bookshops ) th is was t v p i c a l l v

12 ' ,%.

T h e " n o n - n e t " p r i c e is nol

c o m p u l s o r y , a n d i n d e e d is not

u s u a l l y c h a r g e d . B e c a u s e

b o o k s h o p s rece ive a s m a l l e r

d i s c o u n t o n " n o n - n e t " books

t h e y u s u a l l y p r i c e t h e s e

h i g h e r t h a n the " n o n - n e t "

p r i c e . ( T h e firm I w o r k e d l o r

c h a r g e d 10% o n t o p o f " n o n -

n e t " p r i c e . ) T h e a d d i t i o n a l

c h a r g e , h o w e v e r , is u p to the

p a r t i c u l a r b o o k s h o p c o n

c e r n e d .

B o o k s t h a t h a v e t o b e

b o u g h t b y b o o k s h o p s f r o m

f o r e i g n p u b l i s h e r s (e.g. the

U S ) a r e atao c lassed as " n o n -

n e t " i n t h i s c o u n t r y , a n d

b o o k s h o p s s o m e t i m e s a d d as

m u c h as 5 0 % i n t o the p r i c e

(a l ter c o n v e r s i o n to s t e r l i n g )

i n o r d e r to c o v e r costs i n c u r r e d

b y p a y m e n t s i n f o r e i g n c u r

r e n c y .

I w o u l d be i n t e r e s t e d to

l e a r n w h a t M r H i c k ' s p r i c i n g

p o l i c y is w i t h r e g a r d to " n o n -

n c l " books , b o t h f o r m U K

a n d f o r e i g n p u b l i s h e r s .

1 ours sincerely

J u l i a n R i c h a r d s o n

C h e m E n g 4

P S : T h r o u g h b e c o m i n g a

m e m b e r o f " M c G r a w - H i l l

C h e m i c a l E n g i n e e r s B o o k

C l u b " i n t h e U S , I h a v e

b o u g h t m a n y e n g i n e e r i n g

a n d o t h e r books at half the

p r i c e c h a r g e d i n I C B o o k s h o p .

Dear Mark

It was w i t h s ome c o n c e r n

t h a t we r e a d S i m o n S h a w ' s

l e t t e r l a s t w e e k a b o u t t h e

i r r e s p o n s i b l e g a m e s p l a y e d

w i t h a l i r e e x t i n g u i s h e r . T h i s

i s n o t t h e f i r s t t i m e a n

e x t i n g u i s h e r h a s b e e n u n

n e c e s s a r i l y d i s c h a r g e d t h i s

t e r m .

W e w o u l d l i k e to r e m i n d

y o u r r e a d e r s t h a t these games

a r e not f u n — t h e y a r e d a n g e r

ous. A m i s s i n g o r e m p t y l i r e

e x t i n g u i s h e r c a n o b v i o u s l y

t u r n a c o n t r o l l a b l e l i r e i n t o a

m a j o r d isaster .

F i n a l l y , it s h o u l d be n o t e d

that u n n e c e s s a r y d i s c h a r g e o l

a l i r e e x t i n g u i s h e r is aga inst

the l a w o f the l a n d a n d is

p u n i s h a b l e by a l i n e o f u p to

/ 1 . 0 0 0 .

P l e a s e , d e a r s t r i d e s , a c t

r e s p o n s i b l y .

1 ours

T h e I C U n i o n E x e c u t i v e

Dear Sir

F r o m the let ters , c o m m e n t s

a n d g e n e r a l a t t i t u d e a r o u n d

C o l l e g e o v e r the last c o u p l e o f

weeks , I get the i m p r e s s i o n

that a lot o f p e o p l e i n th is

C o l l e g e h a v e l i t t l e o r no i d e a

w h a t t h e " G o d S q u a d "

be l i eve . T h e y seem c o n t e n t to

c a s t us a l l i n t o t h e i r o w n

s tereotype a n d t h e n i n s u l t ,

d e r i d e a n d g e n e r a l l y despise

us ( a n d l o o k i n g at the stereo

t y p e I ' m not r e a l l y s u r p r i s e d ! ) .

T h e p o i n t is t h a t most o f us

d o n ' t l i t i n t o t h i s m o u l d ;

p e o p l e seem g e n u i n e l y s u r

p r i s e d t o see a C h r i s t i a n

p l a y i n g p i n b a l l . o r h a v i n g a

d r i n k i n the b a r . N o w it m a y

be that they are h a p p y w i t h a

gross ly i n a c c u r a t e i d e a o f a

C h r i s t i a n , a n d i f t h a t ' s so,

t h e n f a i r e n o u g h : b u t th is is a

C o l l e g e f u l l o f i n t e l l i g e n t

p e o p l e , a n d s o m e o n e m u s t

w a n t to k n o w m o r e , p u r e l y

f r o m the p o i n t o l v i e w o f f a i r -

m i n d e d n e s s . I f they do , I ' d be

h a p p y to h a v e a c h a t some

t i m e , a n d they c a n find m e

t h r o u g h the M e c h E n g l e t t e r -

racks . I d o n ' t w a n t to p r e a c h ,

I just w a n t to e x p l a i n .

Yours openly

L . M e r c e r

\ 1 E 2

Dear Mr Smith

I was s h o c k e d a n d d i s g u s t e d

to h e a r t h a t for the past five

years I h a v e b e e n i n a d v e r

t e n t l y c o n s u m i n g the f lesh o f

o u r s a c r e d a n i m a l , the c o w , i n

M r M o o n e y ' s re fector ies .

M r M o o n e y has n o t g i v e n

a n y e x p l a n a t i o n o r e v e n a n

a p o l o g y for th is o u t r a g e . I

d o n ' t b e l i e v e he real ises the

seriousness o f his b l u n d e r ( i f

i n d e e d it was a b l u n d e r ) . A s a

d e v o u t H i n d u I h a v e spent

m y w h o l e l i fe f o l l o w i n g the

t e a c h i n g o f o u r p r o p h e t s i n

o u r h o l y books . N o w I rea l i se

t h a t a l l m y f a s t i n g , p r a y i n g

a n d s t r i c t o b s e r v a n c e has a l l

gone to waste .

T h a n k s a lot M r M o o n e y ,

y o u ' v e r e a l l y b u g g e r e d u p m y

c h a n c e s o f h e a v e n !

Yours disgustedly

L a r j a l T a b u g

Dear Sir

A m I t h e f i r s t p e r s o n t o

p u b l i e a l l y r e v e a l t h a t Barney

McCabe is r e a l l y a n a n a g r a m

for Crabby Menace!'

} ours

C . H u m p h r i e s

FELIX, December 4, 1981

Jam packed for Hartley

New chair in Biotechnology T h e final Centenary lecture was given by Professor B.S . Har t l ey I R S

of the Biochemistry department at Imper ia l Col lege. H i s lecture was

entit led ' R C S Leads into Biotechnology ' . H e firstly explained the

techniques involved in produc ing commerc ia l ly important materials

by bacteriological fermentation.

O n e has in i t ia l ly to isolate the gene cod ing for the mater ia l one

wishes to manufacture. T h i s can be done by a variety of classical

m a p p i n g techniques. T h e n it is necessary to excise the gene from the

g e n o m e , th is is d o n e by s p e c i f i c e n z y m e s t e r m e d r e s t r i c t i o n

endonucleases. It is possible to then isolate the gene by hybr id i za t i on to

a radioactive messenger R N A . O n c e isolated the fragment has to be

inserted in a c l on ing vector. T h e c l on ing vector is usually a p lasmid (a

circle of D N A found in bacteria) that is treated wi th the same

restriction endonuclease that was used on the donor genome. T h e ends

of the gene w i l l then adhere to the ends of the p lasmid and a h y b r i d

D N A structure w i l l be formed. T h e p lasmid usually has a ant ib iot i c

resistant gene so that when the p lasmid is inserted in the bacteria the

culture can be cleared of those without plasmids. T h e bacteria w i l l

then m u l t i p l y and generate the desired metabolite.

Professor H a r t l e y then went on to describe the way a vaccine was

developed for hepatitis B virus using this technology in 18 months. H e

then discussed the m u c h more complex prob lem of c l on ing h u m a n

interferon (one of several that were later discovered) w h i c h main ly

centred on developing high p r o d u c i n g strains. Professor H a r t l e y

revealed that the biochemistry department had played the key role of

solving the prob lem of large scale fermentation of interferon produc ing

bacteria. H e then out l ined key areas where the appl i cat ion of this

technology wou ld have a revolut ionary effect. T h e y ranged from

preventive medic ine , genetic advice and plant pathology in the short

term to the l ong term of genetic surgery.

H e also discussed his present investigation of the possibility of using

bacteria to digest hermicelluloses to produce ethanol . Professor L e v y

a n d D r P a l m e r in the biology department , he sa id , were l ook ing at the

degredation o f l i g n i n (a pr inc ip le po lymer in wood) in order to provide

commerc ia l ly important phenolic compounds. H e also listed a number

of biochemicals such as the ant ib iot ic pseudomoni i acid that had been

developed at Imper ia l Col lege.

P r o f e s s o r H a r t l e y t h e n l o o k e d i n t o the f u t u r e . H e a r g u e d

p e r s u a s i v e l y t h a t t h e r e w e r e m a n y o p p o r t u n i t i e s o p e n for

biotechnology. H e revealed that at a A U T meeting a mot ion had been

passed stating that biotechnology at IC should not expand if that

meant redundancies i n other areas. H e said he cou ld understand this

L u d d i t i s m , but was saddened by it. However , he said that he wou ld do

his very best to attract money from private industry to support his

research team. H e then u n v e i l e d his p l a n to establ ish w o r k in

biotechnology rt Imper ia l Col lege. H e wanted to see close co laborat ion

between the chemistry, biology and chemica l engineering departments

to establish a l i n n base. H e also revealed that the L e v e r h u l m e

foundation wou ld be funding a cha ir in biotechnology at Imper ia l

Col lege . In conclusion he said that though R C S was not leading at the

moment , he wou ld do his very best to ensure that it w o u l d in the

future.

T h e r e then followed a series of questions. T h e y were ini t iated by

M r G e r a r d F a i r b r o u g h , C h e i f Execut ive of Ce l l t e ch , Br i ta in ' s first

c ommerc ia l biotechnology company , who had introduced the lecture.

A t then end of the lecture Professor H a r t l e y was thanked by his

friend and co l laborator Professor B low , D e a n of the R o y a l College of

Science.

Ecology

party at IC

Weinberg

forces fill

Physics A p p r o x i m a t e l y 3 0 0 p e o p l e

packed Physics Lec ture Theatre

1 on Tuesday to hear Steven

W e i n b e r g , Professor of Physics at

H a r v a r d and- N o b e l Laureate

(1979) give a lecture on prospects

for f u r t h e r u n i f i c a t i o n i n the

theory of elementary particles.

Imper ia l College 's Professor

A b d u s S a l a m ( w h o w o n his

N o b e l Pr ize jointly wi th W e i n

berg) was in the chair .

T h e t a l k w a s o f a h i g h l y

theoretical nature; two of the

m a i n problems being accelerat

i n g p a r t i c l e s to e n e r g i e s o f

a round 10 1 9 G e V and observing

events w h i c h only happen once

v e r y 1 0 3 2 y e a r s i n a n a t o m .

C u r r e n t l y the former is impos

sible, whi le attempts are be ing

m a d e to s t u d y the l a t t e r i n

several locations in A m e r i c a , by

observing thousands of tonnes of

water.

T h e most d i sappo int ing aspect

of the event was that the venue

was too smal l , a n d it had been

poorly advertised. W i t h a little

more effort, even the Great H a l l

could have been filled.

Heinz spills

the beans!

O n M o n d a y Wellsoc presented a

talk by H e i n z Wolll 'e , best known

to the pub l i c for his appearances

in the B B C ' s ' Y o u n g Scientist '

and 'Great E g g R a c e ' series. T h e

lecture was entitled "Fools for

L i v i n g ' , and concerned the work

d o n e by M r W o l f f e a n d h i s

colleagues at the C l i n i c a l R e

search Centre at H a r r o w , and

others, in p r o d u c i n g devices to

e n a b l e t h e e l d e r l y a n d t h e

disabled to live fuller a n d more

i n d e p e n d e n t l i ves . M r W o l f f e

c o n s i d e r s t h a t the i n c r e a s i n g

spending power of the elderly,

coupled wi th their h igherexpecta -

tions of l i v i n g standards, w i l l

h a v e as l a r g e a n i m p a c t o n

commerce as that ol teenagers in

the 1950s a n d 60s. T h i s develop

ment w i l l involve j o b creation

a n d w i l l a l s o i n c r e a s e t h e

resources devoted to the needs of

the young disabled.

Next week, Wellsoc present a

talk by J i m Franc is , who is a

m e m b e r o l t h e B B C S p e c i a l

E f f e c t s d e p a r t m e n t a n d has

worked on programmes such as

'Blakes Seven ' a n d ' D r W h o ' .

A c c o m m o d a t i o n

College

A lew places still avai lable in

shared rooms in student houses

for the rest of the year.

People not current ly in residence

who want Chr is tmas vacat ion

p l a c e s c a n c o n t a c t S t u d e n t

S e r v i c e s .

Flat for 4 (2 dbles) avai lable in

H a m l e t G d n s at £14.50 each.

Private

1 or 2 g i r l s to share s l i g h t l y

anarch ic fiat w i t h 5 or 6 others at

£17.65pw.

Some single a n d double bedsits

close to Col lege . Rents from £\5

to ;£25pw.

For further information on any of the

above contael Student Services.

The lirst meeting this year of the

E n v i r o n m e n t a l Society took the

form of a talk on M o n d a y by

Pau l L k i n s . G e n e r a l Secretary of

the Ecology Party , in which the

party's phi losophy and policies

were out l ined .

M r F.lkins stressed that his

party d i d not believe, as d id the

lour m a i n Bri t ish parties, that

improvement in the qual i ty of life

cou ld be achieved by c ont inu

ously increasing product ion and

consumpt ion . H i s party 's policies

were based on product ion wi th

the m i n i m u m e c o l o g i c a l d i s

r u p t i o n a n d t h e m a x i m u m

c o n s e r v a t i o n , as w e l l as t h e

m a i n t e n a n c e o f a s u s t a i n a b l e

populat ion . O v e r a l l the party-

a d v o c a t e d d e c e n t r a l i z a t i o n ,

increased self-sufficiency a n d a

m o r e g e n u i n e l y d e m o c r a t i c ,

small-scale society; in par t i cu lar

they proposed greater incentives

lor the employment of people

'the most underused resource'.

N e x t week, the E n v i r o n m e n t a l

Society w i l l present a talk by a

g e o l o g i s t o n the d i s p o s a l o f

radioact ive waste (1800, M o n d a y

47 P r i n c e ' s G a r d e n s ) ; a f u l l

p r o g r a m m e of talks and lectures

is p lanned for the year.

Cheers for

Queen Mum P r i n c e Char les p a i d a visit to the

R o y a l C o l l e g e o f M u s i c last

• T h u r s d a y a f t e r n o o n , a c c o m

panied by the Q u e e n M o t h e r , to

receive an honourary fel lowship

of the R C M .

T h e Queen M o t h e r , however,

stole the show yet again , steal ing

the hearts of cheer ing I C students,

in her standard blue dress, w h i c h

succeeded in d r a w i n g attention

away from Char les ' b a l d patch .

E x t r a o r d i n a r y

G e n e r a l M e e t i n g

A n F j G M has b e e n c a l l e d to

discuss the I C - Q E C merger. It

w i l l be h e l d nex t T h u r s d a y ,

D e c e m b e r 10.

N A T I O N A L B L O O D T R A N S F U S I O N

S E R V I C E

Tuesday 8 and Wednesday 9 December

10:00 to 12:00am a n d 2:00 to 4:00pm

in the U n i o n D i n i n g H a l l

Y o u r b lood is needed, please make the effort.

FEUX, December 4, 1981

Letters Dear Mark and Readers

I w a s p r o m p t e d to w r i t e to

y o u b y a p o m p o u s i l l - i n f o r m e d

p i e c e o f d r i v e l w h i c h w a s t e d

1 ' / j c o l u m n o f last week ' s

le t ters p a g e . (So you're following

suil-Ed.)

I h a v e u n t i l n o w h a d

suf f i c ient s e l l - c o n t r o l t o not

i n d u l g e i n p e t t y b i c k e r i n g

o v e r foo l i sh a l l e g a t i o n s m a d e

a g a i n s t m e , b u t I f i n a l l y feel

t h a t I m u s t say s o m e t h i n g i n

m y de fence .

W i l l i a m D u r o d i e is v e r y

e x c i t e d a b o u t c e r t a i n ' u n d e r

t a k i n g s ' t h a t I g a v e to the

p o l i c e w h i l s t I w a s R a g

C h a i r m a n . T h e s e ' u n d e r

t a k i n g s ' a r e t h e s t a n d a r d

c o n d i t i o n s u n d e r w h i c h

c o l l e c t i n g l i c ences a r e issued

to a n y o r g a n i s a t i o n . T h e y a r e

s ta ted q u i t e c l e a r l y o n the

o f f i c i a l l i c e n c e ce r t i f i ca tes a n d

d o c u m e n t a t i o n w h i c h w e

r e c e i v e f r o m the p o l i c e . G i v e n

t h a t t h e r e is n o t h i n g e x t r a

o r d i n a r y a b o u t the c o n d i t i o n s

o f o u r b e i n g g r a n t e d l i c ences

o n e c a n o n l y p r e s u m e t h a t

W i l l i a m c a n n o t r e a d , e v e n so

he c o u l d ask m e . I a m q u i t e

c a p a b l e o f n o r m a l c o m m u

n i c a t i o n , b u t p e r h a p s h e

c o u l d n ' t be b o t h e r e d to l eave

his t h r o n e a n d d e s c e n d to m y

l e v e l , a l t e r n a t i v e l y h is l a c k o f

c o m m u n i c a t i o n c o u l d i n d i c a t e

a n o v e r w h e l m i n g c a p a b i l i t y

to d o the j ob .

W i l l i a m goes o n to m a k e

t h r e e p o i n t s c o n c e r n i n g the

J u n e d e a d l i n e f o r a u d i t e d

a c c o u n t s , t w o o f w h i c h c o n

c e r n m e .

H e is most p e r c e p t i v e i n

n o t i c i n g t h a t C o l l e g e e x a m

i n a t i o n s o c c u r at a b o u t the

s a m e t i m e as o u r c o l l e c t i o n

a c c o u n t s m u s t be s u b m i t t e d

o t ' t h e p o l i c e . U n f o r t u n a t e l y it

is n o t i n m y p o w e r to m o d i f y

e i t h e r d a t e , b u t a l i t t l e

c o m m o n s e n s e s h o w s t h a t

c i r c u m s t a n c e s a r e n o d i f f e rent

f r o m p r e v i o u s years .

T h e r e a s o n w h y w e c o u l d

n o t o b t a i n a n y c o l l e c t i n g

l i c e n c e s u n t i l J a n u a r y l a s t

y e a r a r e s u r p r i s i n g l y i d e n t i c a l

to the p r o b l e m s th i s y e a r i n

t h a t the p o l i c e w i l l no t issue a

n e w l i c e n c e u n t i l the a c c o u n t s

f r o m the p r e v i o u s y e a r h a v e

b e e n a u d i t e d a n d s u b m i t t e d

t o t h e m . W i l l i a m a g a i n

c o m p l a i n s t h a t I f a i l e d to t e l l

h i m a l l th is but the i n f o r m a t i o n

is at his d i s p o s a l i n the R a g

O f f i c e .

H e goes o n to a l l e g e that

r e m i n d e r s for the a c c o u n t s

w e r e sent to m e . I h a v e n e v e r

r e c e i v e d t h e m , p e r h a p s he

s a w l i t to t h r o w t h e m a w a y

because they d i d n ' t m e n t i o n

h i m ? T h e w o r k i n g s o f h i s

s p i t e f u l s u b c o n s c i o u s m i n d

s h o w t h r o u g h w h e n he i m a

gines t h a t I w o u l d a t t e m p t to

u n d e r m i n e R a g just to sp i te

the l i t t l e t o a d .

W h e n I t o o k o n the j ob o f

R a g C h a i r m a n a n d w h i l s t

o c c u p i e d i n that p o s i t i o n it

was n o l f or the sake o f p o w e r ,

b u t because I w i s h e d to h e l p

o t h e r p e o p l e by r a i s i n g m o n e y

l o r t h e m . I f t h i s m o t i v e h a d

g u i d e d e v e r y o n e i n v o l v e d

w i t h I C R a g last y e a r I a m

c e r t a i n t h a t it w o u l d h a v e

be-en m o r e success fu l , n o one

w a s m o r e d i s a p p o i n t e d t h a n I

a l the c o n t i n u o u s b i c k e r i n g ,

i n - l i g h t i n g a n d l a c k o f c o

o p e r a t i o n e x p e r i e n c e d

t h r o u g h o u t the y e a r .

Its a f a i r l y i r r e l e v a n t p o i n t ,

but I d i d not a c t u a l l y h a n d

o v e r l o W i l l i a m , b u t left R a g

i n the c a p a b l e h a n d s o f A l a n

E d w a r d s a n d the t h r e e C C U

V P s w h e n I r e s i g n e d . I m a d e

it q u i t e c l e a r to A l a n t h a t i f

t h e r e was a n y t h i n g I c o u l d

p o s s i b l y d o to h e l p t h e n I w a s

most w i l l i n g to d o so, th i s

m u s t s u r e l y be s e l l - e v i d e n t

a n y h o w unless a n y o n e t h i n k s

t h a t I h a r b o u r s u c h sp i te as

W i l l i a m D u r o d i e .

It g ives m e n o p l e a s u r e to

see R a g i n t r o u b l e because o f

W i l l i a m , b u t he c a n n o t t r y

a n d shift the b l a m e o n to

o t h e r s , he is the C h a i r m a n

a n d t h a t ' s w h e r e the b u c k

stops.

M y l i n a l regrets a r e the

d e t r i m e n t a l effects that th i s

s o r d i d a l f a i r w i l l h a v e o n I C

R a g ' s r e l a t i o n s h i p w i t h the

P o l i c e a n d a lso the effects o n

o u r c h a r i t i e s .

Yours a rerr sad 'com/dele moron

I a n H o d g s o n . E l e c E n g 3

R a g C h a i r m a n . 1980 I

C h r i s t m a s D i n n e r i n H a l l

D e c e m b e r 15. Tu.fiO

T i c k e t s a r e s t i l l a v a i l a b l e f r o m

P a t u n t i l M o n d a y . 1 : 0 0 p m .

Small Ads

•VACATION WORK W e are a D E S r e c o g n i s e d E n g l i s h

l a n g u a g e s c h o o l with a new b u d g e t

c o u r s e to p r o m o t e — i f y o u w o u l d like

to h e l p w i t h l e a f l e t d i s t r i b u t i o n

in C e n t r a l L o n d o n , p l e a s e p h o n e us

n o w o n 937-6229/5602, b e t w e e n 10:00

a n d 3:00.

|»The following items are in the Lost Property of the Security Office. If they

jare not c l a i m e d s o o n t h e y will b e sent

(to the N u r s e r y J u m b l e sale . If a n y of

t h e s e items are r e c o g n i s e d p l e a s e cal l

at 150 S h e r f i e l d .

B r o w n w o l l e n s c a r f with red & white

str ipe ; g r e e n p a r k e r coat ; navy b lue

w o o l l e n scarf ; b r o w n duffel coat ; navy

b l u e / l i g h t b l u e s t r i p e d s c a r f ; b l u e

w a t e r p r o o f jacket ; y e l l o w r a i n m a c k ;

b l u e silk s h o r t s with J o g g e r written o n

front; b l a c k p u l l o v e r with H a r p e m b l e m

in g o l d ; o r a n g e m a c k ; g r e y pul lover ;

b r o w n imitat ion s u e d e coat , fur c o l l a r

a n d cuffs ; b l u e j u m p e r with n a v y b lue

e d g i n g ; g r e e n s t r i p e d shirt ; light g r e e n

j u m p e r ; m u s t a r d c o l o u r e d scarf ; navy

b l u e v a l o u r j u m p e r ; light b r o w n j u m p

er; jean jacket ; g r e e n j u m p e r ; b r o w n

plast ic a n o r a k ; b l a c k jacket ; water -

plast ic a n o r a k ; b l a c k jacket ; water

p r o o f jacket b lue

•Black leather jeans, s ize 12, v g c ,

h a r d l y w o r n , £ 6 3 new, will a c c e p t

£ 4 0 o n o . C o n t a c t H e l e n , 373-8746 ( R m

18).

•An amazing grace: A T e a c A - 3 3 0 0

r e e l - t o - r e e l t a p e d e c k ( s e m i - p r o

fessional) with four free 10" N A B reels .

A s I s a i d " a m a z i n g " for o n l y £ 2 0 0 . S e r i

o u s a p p l i c a t i o n s o n l y . N o t i m e w a s t e r s

o r tyre k i c k e r s . P h o n e S h e z i A b e d i ,

352-7446 (eves).

•For swop (or sale) 2 P o l i c e t ickets , D e c 16, for 2 G e n e s i s or 2 E L O tickets ,

a n y date . R i c k P o w d r e l l , M a t h s 1.

•Two girls wanted to s h a r e d b l e r m in

a d e q u a t e S h e p h e r d s B u s h flat with 5

others , £ 1 7 . 6 5 p w + bil ls . C o n t a c t F .

W i l l i a m s , L i f e S c i l e t t e r - r a c k s . N o

b i k e r s .

•For hire: O n e pair of pink u n d e r p a n t s .

C o n t a c t D . V . M o l e s w o r t h , M i n i n g 2.

•The adventures of Al: I n t r o d u c t i o n — A c o n t e m p o r a r y s t o r y of true life r o

m a n c e . C h a p t e r 1: T h e first tentative

s t e p s have b e e n m a d e ( T o b e c o n t i n

ued)

•The Paw—Hiding b e h i n d a n o n y m i t y

will get y o u n o w h e r e . R e v e a l y o u r i -

dent i ty a n d d i s p u t e l ike a m a n . A n d for

Pete 's s a k e lay off the f r o z e n steaks .

L o v e F R O S T .

•Angela—Apologies. W e all m a k e m i s

takes , J o n .

•Light Removals It's a l m o s t t ime to c e l e b r a t e

T h e festive s e a s o n is near

G o o d p e o p l e think of m e

W h e n s i p p i n g y o u r s h e r r y or beer

T h e y e a r is nearly over

H a v e I not s e r v e d thee wel l?

G o o d p e o p l e think of m e

A n d let's g ive m e a c h e e r .

R i c h a r d 2801

•Learn to fly this Christmas C o n t a c t IC

H a n g - g l i d i n g C l u b , 12 :30pm, a b o v e

S o u t h s i d e B a r o n M o n d a y s or C h r i s

G o l d i n g , M e c h E n g 3. (As featured in

Punch )

•Blood doning o n T u e s d a y a n d W e d

n e s d a y , 10:00-12:00 a n d 2:00-4:00, in

the U n i o n D i n i n g H a l l . P l e a s e give your b l o o d .

•BUNAC Interested in w o r k i n g in the

U S A or C a n a d a this s u m m e r ? T h e n

c o m e to the G r e e n C o m m i t t e e R o o m

(top f loor, U n i o n B u i l d i n g ) this F r i d a y

at 12 :30pm.

•If interested in forming a Go Club, p l e a s e c o n t a c t H y o u n g - K y S h i n , o n int

2175 or B . B e l c s a k o n 2435.

•Socialist Standard W o u l d a n y o n e w h o has read the a b o v e j o u r n a l a n d

w i s h e s to d i s c u s s a n y of its c o n t e n t s ,

p l e a s e c o m e to a m e t i n g o n W e d D e c 9

at 1:15pm in the G r e e n C o m m R m , top

f loor, U n i o n B u i l d i n g .

•Sex T h e r e is a n art ic le o n sex in the

c u r r e n t ( D e c 81) i ssue of the Socialist

Standard w h i c h will be o n sale (price

20p) at a d i s c u s s i o n m e e t i n g o n W e d

D e c 9 at 1:15pm in the G r e e n C o m m

R m , t o p f loor, U n i o n B u i l d i n g . Al l w e l

c o m e .

•Cupboard to let, K n i g h t s b r i d g e , c o m

plete with shelf, in a fr iendly k i t c h e n . A

s n i p at £ 2 4 . 5 0 p w . C o n t a c t D. Firth , 14

M o n t p e l i e r St .

•General derision: L i n s t e a d C h e m E n g 3 + C o , d e r i d e h o m o s e x u a l s with p o n y

tails.

•Jill Congrats o n s e m a p h o r e b a d g e !

•Linstead Arrows rule. U n l u c k y G a r

d e n a n d thanks . W h e r e is the c o m

pet i t ion? P . C . E . E . I . D . I . O .

•Bisexual Peruvian arts grad s e e k s E s k i m o J e w (ono) , male (21+) / female

for d e e p t h i n k i n g re la t ionship + theatre

trips . G e n u i n e repl ies o n l y to C h e m

p i g e o n h o l e ' M ' .

•Bonzo—Don't forget the " A n g l i n g

T i m e s " a n d thigh length bo o ts o n Sat

n i g h t — W o o d s t o c k .

•Zenon: C o n g r a t u l a t i o n s on y o u r s p e

c ia l p r i z e — C l e v e r y o u ! Next t ime ask

for c h i c k e n legs

•D-A-K-S-H-l-N-l I c o u l d n ' t resist a

c h a l l e n g e . L o v e , G a r y .

•Miss Bhenduva; I l ied , T h u r s night

w a s m y first t ime. T h a n k y o u for b e i n g

s o gent le . B o b S p e e r .

•Markipoos Turdfeatures & Floppy-kins. O o d l e s of Congrats o n y o u r e n

g a g e m e n t . M a n y h a p p y nuffles, L o v e

S o u t h s i d e D r i n k e r s .

•Kirt Gerbil Award 1981: S t e p h e n O ' J

d ' A r m i t a g e " L a z y c o w " M c H a r r i s o n . P S

K e e p up the g o o d w o r k ( o u t s ) , S teve !

Three years on the air! Back in the d im and distant past of December 1978, IC Radio started

broadcasting on medium wave (301m, 999kHz) , becoming the first and

o n l y i n n e r - c i t y s t u d e n t r a d i o s t a t i o n in the c o u n t r y . N o t to be

overshadowed by any other anniversary celebrations, they're celebrating

the third anniversary of this stupendous event by having a party with free

birthday cake. It's going to take place in Southside Bar this Monday

evening (the 7th), between 7:00 and 10:00pm. Throughout the evening,

p r o g r a m m e s wi l l be b r o a d c a s t f r o m the b a r , a n d there wi l l be

competitions, one of the prizes for which is a really tasteful Christmas

album by the Y o b s .

A m o n g the olher programmes to listen out for 'on IC Radio is

'Viewpoint ' , tonight and every Friday at 8:00pm, which provides an hour

of news and views from the past week; theatre, c inema and gig guides

and reviews; and what's on around College. A s well as listening to it, you

may be interested in contributing to the programme, whether you're in IC

Radio or not; if so, contact Steve Hartwell at the station (int 3440).

Features that you may be interested in covering could include: the pros

and eons of N U S , or the residence situation and what is behind the

possible rent rises.

So don't forget: for free birthday cake—Southside Bar on Monday

evening be there (or be somewhere else).


Desert Rats

Nearly a year ago a group of

keen and ambitious physicists

decided to launch an expedi

tion to what is probably the

most widely know desert

region, the Sahara.

The idea didn't materialise over

night; it arose, rather, as a natural

p r o g r e s s i o n of events s t a r t i n g

from a discussion about holiday

plans during the long vac. "Having

decided where to go, we then had

to decide 'why'?, 'in what?' and

'how do we finance it? '" explained

Simon Rodan.

F r o m this seemingly shambolic

s t a r t i n g p o i n t d e v e l o p e d a n

expedition covering 4,000 miles,

two thousand in the Sahara itself,

in two L W B landrovers, over an

eight week period during August

and September.

Ideas for scientific studies were

collected and chewed over by the

team of six, and three projects

were chosen. These were outlined

in a document, which also con

tained the proposed route, dates,

modes of transport and predicted

expenses, which was submitted to

the Exploration Board of Imperial

College, which has a small annual

budget frokm which it can help

f u n d s u c h v e n t u r e s . M a l c o l m

Risbey, the expedition's treasurer

recalls those initial attempts at

c o s t i n g : " w h e n we set a b o u t

calculating the cost of the trip we

w e r e v e r y u n s u r e as to t h e

accuracy of our predictions, but

surprisingly perhaps, if you take

into account the fact that we now

have two landrovers rather than

one as originally planned, we have

kept remarkably closely to our

original estimates." The team was

interviewed by the board, and

s u b s e q u e n t l y g a i n e d o f f i c i a l

r e c o g n i t i o n a n d a s u b s t a n t i a l

degree of financial assistance.

Of the immediate tasks, by far

the m o s t p r e s s i n g was to get

s p o n s o r s h i p , p r i m a r i l y f r o m

British Industry. Dur ing February

and M a r c h , the six members of

the team wrote, and produced a

b r o c h u r e br ie f ly o u t l i n i n g the

expedition. These they sent with

a c c o m p a n y i n g l e t ters to m o r e

t h a n t w o h u n d r e d a n d f i f ty

companies in the U K requesting

aid either in cash or in kind. The

A l g e r i a n E m b a s s y h a d to be

contacted, and were most helpful'

even if tied by too much red tape.

Another document was produced

f o r t h e A l g e r i a n M i n i s t r y o f

Education, in French and English,

four copies each of this largish fifty

page type script. "In the end this

was all wasted time since we did

not get any response from the

Algerians until early November . "

By June , quite a large amount of

help had arrived despite, the poor

s t a t e of the e c o n o m y , w h i c h

meant a 4% success rate in terms

of useful replies to letters sent

compared to a predicted rate of

10% or more, and none of this in

the f o r m of d i re c t (and m u c h

needed) financial aid.

O n the scientific side, David

Harris and Clive Standley spent

many weeks carefully construct

ing the delicate net flux radio

meters needed for the project and

devising the scientific procedure

for the experiments. The aim of

the p r i m a r y p r o j e c t w a s to

i n v e s t i g a t e the r e l a t i o n s h i p

between heat transfer to and from

the desert floor and high altitude

water vapour. As July 28, the

scheduled departure date, drew

nearer the final stages of prepara

tion were completed, the most

detailed available maps studied,

routes finalised and an accurate

itinerary drawn up. Dehydrated

food was bought and items of

equipment such as sand ladders,

m i l i t a r y s p e c g e r r i c a n s a n d

frames.

A l l the team attended courses

on desert survival and first aid,

while individual members went on .

specialised courses in landrover

maintenance, expedition photo

graphy, and maintenance of the

two chart recorders (which were

the most i m p o r t a n t i n d i v i d u a l

items in the experiment) at the

manufacturers, Chessel l L t d of

Worthing , who had kindly donated

the recorders.

Everything was going to plan

until two weeks before the team

was due to leave, three of them

learned that they had failed an

exam and they were advised by

the department to sit the retakes

o n S e p t e m b e r 2. T h e t e a m

returned to L o n d o n , where they

met Brian Morgan , Director of

U G Studies, and Keith Barnham,

Senior Tutor , and subsequently

Bob Schroder and D o n Adlington,

C h a i r m a n a n d S e c r e t a r y r e s

p e c t i v e l y o f t h e E x p l o r a t i o n

Board . It was decided that the

bes t s o l u t i o n , if s p o n s o r s h i p

c o m m i t m e n t s w e r e not to be

ignored, and as the team were still

keen to go, was to postpone the

t r i p u n t i l the f o l l o w i n g y e a r .

U n f o r t u n a t e l y s i n c e t h e n t w o

m e m b e r s h a v e h a d s e c o n d

thoughts and have dropped out,

leaving the team with four. " W e

would still like to take eight people

this summer, since we have got

the room and we could do with

some fresh ideas," said Andrew

L a y t o n , t h e t e a m ' s r e s i d e n t

mechanic.

So now the team must start

once again to get the show rolling,

though this year much of the work

has already been done. If anyone

reading this article feels that they

would like to take on the challenge

that the expedition offers, there

are four places to be filled before

C h r i s t m a s . A n y o n e i n t e r e s t e d

should get in touch with S imon

R o d a n , M a l c o l m R i s b y , D a v i d

Harris or Andrew Layton all of

Physics 2.

FELIX DINNER Fr iday , D e c e m b e r 11

S C R Southside

7:30 for 8:00pm

Everybody welcome (the more the merrier)!

Tickets £7 f rom F E L I X Office. Names to FELIX Office by Tuesday, 2:00pm.


Food For Thought The sad state of IC's refectories

T h e e a g e r l y - a w a i t e d r e s u l t s of the I C U

refectory survey have finally been published,

and as expected, they say nothing that was not

a l r e a d y k n o w n . T h e m a i n c o n c l u s i o n is

that IC catering is unacceptably bad. T h e

report, submitted by Messrs L e d wold and

M o r t o n , also contrives to avoid mentioning

anything that could offend the powers on high,

e . g . s a c k i n g M o o n e y a n d l e a s i n g t h e

refectories to an independent company; steps

that would most rapidly improve the lot of the

IC penniless gourmet.

The report was compiled from question

naires distributed in the four main refectories

(Sherfield, U n i o n , Buttery and Southside) and

in L i n s t e a d . It was m a d e o v e r t w o d a y s ,

M o n d a y 26 and Thursday 29 October ; Sample

sizes (i.e. the number of forms filled in) range

from the relatively small (100) to the pathetic

(22). The questions covered the meal just

p u r c h a s e d , r e f e c t o r y s e r v i c e in g e n e r a l ,

q u e u e s , c o o k - f r e e z e f o o d , r e c y c l e d f o o d ,

breakfast service, suggested improvements

and increased services, bars, Ha l l and formal

d inners , the S o u t h s i d e S h o p and " s p e c i a l

.reaction noted from consumer" (vomiting,

r i g o r m o r t i s ? ) . N o q u e s t i o n s were a s k e d

concerning prices, hygiene and cleanliness, or

the "foreign substances" (e.g. staples, ground

glass) frequently found in tbe food.

' N o results concerning bars, Hal l and formal

dinners, or the shop have been published, as

m o s t p e o p l e left t h e s e s e c t i o n s b l a n k ;

therefore the compilers may assume that these

services are either satisfactory, ignored or the

results have not been processed.

The published survey includes results, a

s u m m a r y of the r e s u l t s , a n d c o n c l u s i o n s

drawn from the summary of the results. It is

not light bed-time reading and was quite a few

p a g e s , s o h e r e is a " s u m m a r y o f t h e

conclusions drawn form the summary of the

results" ! A l l quotes are direct.

T h e Four Main Refectories

G e n e r a l r e s u l t : A b o u t h a l f the p e o p l e

questioned in each refectory were happy with

that particular meal. W e are certain that a

commerc ia l venture would not accept such a

low level of satisfaction.

Cook-freeze foods: " . . .becoming coagulated

or congealed too many t imes" (as if once isn't

enough). " M o s t people asked don't like cook-

freeze food, which is unfortunate if you get no

choice for your evening meal . "

R e c y c l i n g : " M a n y s e e m to feel they are

getting recycled food."

C l e a n l i n e s s a n d H y g i e n e : " I n e v e r y

r e f e c t o r y t h e r e w e r e c o m p l a i n t s a b o u t

cleanliness and hygiene. Sometimes the point

was made quite strongly suggesting public

health inspectors should be brought i n . "

Staff : " I n e v e r y r e c f e c t o r y t h e r e w e r e

complaints about rude or unpleasant staff."

Breakfast and Weekend services: " O n l y 15

people admitted to using the breakfast service

often 75 people (over 2 days) said they use

the weekend service often."

Prices: "Virtual ly everybody said the prices

were too high."

Suggested increased services: "It seems

that approximately half the people asked want

an increase in sandwiches and rolls type cold

food. About a quarter want an increase in the

range of puddings and more fast food."

"there were well over 300 requests for more

barfood."

Other remarks: "There were" (was Marco )

" a huge n u m b e r of unso l i c i ted c o m m e n t s

about the high quality of the R C A and R C M

refectories."

Eleven Conclusions

1. T h e refectories simply must improve the all-

r ound level of cleanliness.

2. The staff could be a lot more pleasant. This

comment should not be taken personally by

any member of the refectory staff. It is an

overall problem of commitment to students.

Students are not the most tactful or diplomatic

breed and all we are asking for is a more

tolerant approach from the staff. This might

generate a better nature from the students and

improve the current relationships.

3. M o r e care is needed in the final stages of

the process of preparing food for students.

These are simple matters; a bit more care in

meal presentation, trying to keep "ho t " food

hot, and ensuring correct amounts are cooked

to prevent continually reheating food for the

next session.

4. Someone somewhere should learn how to

cook chips and how not to wreck vegetables.

5. The quality of the meat should improve—it

has too m u c h fat or gristle and is often said to

be undercooked. O n this subject the fish is not

too good either, often said to be "soggy".

6. There are many specific complaints about

types of food which could be easily rectified

(e.g. solid baked beans, hard rice pudding,

etc.).

7. Different organisation of queues might be

considered in some refectories.

8. There is a need for a salad bar selling good

quality salads at reasonable prices, possibly " a

la R C A " which got several mentions. This can

be c o m b i n e d w i t h a d e m a n d f o r m o r e

sandwiches, rolls and other co ld foods. There

is also a demand for an increased range of hot

food and more variety every day. The question

"what type of food do our refectories cook

best?" yielded no clear favourites, so maybe all

types should be offered; casseroles, roasts,

fries, grills, etc. W e are formulating a hot

food/cold food plan.

9. There is a demand for more food in the

bars. This may fit in very well with the point

above.

10. The demand for a breakfast service is

minimal and the justification for this service

must now be questionable. The demand for a

l u n c h - t i m e s e r v i c e is m a s s i v e a n d for a n

evening service substantial. The demand for

the weekend service is m u c h smaller. Possibly

the survey captured the wrong people for

estimating the need for weekend meals. Either

way we believe the College has a social duty,

as a c o m m u n i t y , to p r o v i d e f o o d at the

weekends.

11. The food in Linstead is totally unaccept

able. This situation must be seriously reviewed

immediately.

T h e s i t u a t i o n in L i n s t e a d H a l l is t h a t ,

apparently as a condition of the presentation

of the Hal l to IC by an anonymous benefactor,

all students must eat there at least three times

per week. This costs them £1.27 per meal.

The results from the Linstead survey were

frightening; on Monday 86% were "unhappy

with the quality of the meal" . O n Thursday , it

was 89%. T o the question "are you generally

happy with the service in the refectory?" on

Monday 67% were not, on Thursday only 39%

were not. O n closer inspection, however, it

was seen that only 19 people were interviewed

on Thursday compared with 76 on Monday .

This highlights one of our criticisms of the

survey; it was unrepresentative. Al lowing for

the fact that a vast number of students never eat

Mooneys because they are so bad, to restrict

the survey to people eating in refectories was

ludicrous. In answer to this, M a r c o Ledwold

claimed that constructive criticism could only

be made by regular refectory users; how often,

I w o n d e r , d o he a n d N i c k M o r t o n eat

Mooneys .

A rough calculation reveals that, if only half

of the people who eat in refectories find the

service satisfactory, this means that between

80 a n d 9 0 % of a i l s t u d e n t s at I C w o u l d

welcome improvements.

The other main crit ic ism is the rather half

hearted approach to the matter. Refectories

have been a standing joke now for years, and

such remarks as (and I quote from " T h e

Plan" ) .

" A nice fresh sandwich with a cup of tea or a

drink could prove a popular lunch in these

h a r d t i m e s . " a r e n o t g o i n g t o c a u s e a

revolution. It is to be hoped that, having

obtained these results, the U n i o n acts on

them; remember N i c k Mor ton ' s promise at the

first U G M of term?

Fully Guaranteed

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SAME DA Y REPAIR SERVICE

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New: 5-speeds Br i t i sh Eagle usual ly £78 now £70.

Cl ipper L u x u s Sport usually £79 now £72.

New: 10-speeds Bri t ish Eagle usually £92 now £80.

Lu xus Sport usually £88 now £78.

Peugeot U 0 1 0 10-speeds alloy wheels , cotterless chainsets , etc., usually £145 now £124.

For the short distance cyc l ist se cond -hand small wheel cyc les between £20 and £30.

L imi ted number of ex-rental cyc les £49.00.

Trade-ins accepted, also credit facilities available.


What 's On Friday, December 4

• A n t i - A p a r t h e i d G r o u p M e e t i n g with speaker from

South African Non-Racial Olympic Committee , 12:30pm,

Huxley 340. •>

• B U N A C w e e k l y m e e t i n g , 12:30pm, G r e e n C o m m R m .

R m .

• N e w i t t L e c t u r e ( C h e m E n g S o c ) , 5:00pm, C h e m E n g

L T 1 . Title ' C h e m i c a l Engineering—past , present and fu

ture' by Prof J . F . Richardson.

• C h r i s t i a n U n i o n F e l l o w s h i p M e e t i n g with talk on

T h e Victory ' , 6:30pm, Music R m , 53 Princes Gates .

Followed by coffee and biscuits.

• A l m o s t C h r i s t m a s P a r t y , 8:00pm, E l . With live band

'Bumble and the Beez ' , disco and bar.

• I C C A G S o u p R u n , meet 10:30pm, Falmouth Kitchens.

Sunday, December 6

• W e s t L o n d o n C h a p l a i n c y S e r v i c e the preacher will

be Deaconess Pamela Maggs, 10:00am, Consort Gallery.

• W a r g a m e s C l u b M e e t i n g , 1:00pm, Union S C R .

Monday, December 7

• H . G . W e l l s S o c i e t y presents Jim Francis , creator of

special effects from HitchHikers G u i d e to the Galaxy , D r

W h o and B l a k e s ? will speak about his walk, 7:30pm, Elec

E n g 408. Entry by membership only.

• H a n g - G l i d i n g C l u b m e e t i n g , 12:30pm, above South-

side Bar . (As featured in Punch this week!)

• D a n c i n g C l u b A d v a n c e d C l a s s , 7:30pm, J C R .

Tuesday, December 8

• B l o o d D o n i n g between 10:00-12:00 a n d 2:00 4:00 in the

U n i o n Dining Hal l .

• C a t h o l i c m a s s a n d l u n c h , 12:30pm, C h e m 231. There

will be a nominal charge for lunch.

• B o a r d s a i l i n g C l u b w e e k l y m e e t i n g , 12:30 and 6:15,

Southside U p p e r Lounge. C o n t a c t N i c k Ajderian M E 3 or

A n d y G r i m s h a w Z o o 2.

M i n i n g House is a mixed student residence in

E v e l y n G a r d e n s o f a p p r o x i m a t e l y 100

students from all Co l l ege departments. Appli

c a t i o n s are i n v i t e d f r o m a p o s t g r a d u a t e

student who preferably has two years left at

Col lege , for the posit ion of Warden. A rent-

free flat is provided which is suitable for a

couple .

The duties of the Warden are to organise the

running of the house both from a soc ial and

• D e p t of H u m a n i t i e s p r e s e n t s

1. A n E n g i n e e r l o o k s at B i o l o g y

Part 3 Evolution and the Managing Director with Prof

Eric Laithwaite, 1:30pm, Read Theatre, Sherfield.

2. M o u n t a i n , D e s e r t , S e a

Part 2 Solo Exploration in the Sahara with T o m Sheppard ,

Saharan explorer and writer, 1:30pm, Pippard Theatre ,

Sherfield. (Arranged by 1C Exploratin Board.)

• S t a r s o n S T O I C with A n d r e w Sachs , 1:00pm only. A

chance for this year's first years, and anyone who missed

it last year, to see our interview with A n d r e w Sachs

(Manuel of Fawlty Towers) .

• I n d u s t r i a l S o c ta lk on Philips Electrical, 1:00pm, C h e m

E n g Theatre 1.

• N a t u r a l H i s t o r y S o c i e t y present Alan Secco m b e of

L S 2 speaking on 'Th e Seychelles' , with slides, 1:00pm,

Botany Basement L T . Membership at door, 50p.

• M o p s o c L e c t u r e 'Early Days of Radio' , 1:10, Physics

L T 2 (level 1). Free to members , non-members lOp,

membership 60p.

• I C A m n e s t y G r o u p m e e t i n g , 5:30pm, G r e e n C o m m

R m , top floor, U n i o n Building.

• M e t & M a t S o c e v e n i n g l e c t u r e , 6:00pm, R S M G20 .

' F a m o u s Failures' (Or why d o ships fall to bits), by D r T i m

Baker (IC).

• A u d i o S o c m e e t i n g , 6:30pm, U n i o n U p p e r Lounge .

T h e r e will be no further A u d i o S o c meetings until next

term.

• S o c i a l i s t S o c i e t y s p e a k e r m e e t i n g 'Society for the

Protection of U n b o r n Chi ldren ' , 6:30pm, G r e e n C o m m

R m . T h e subject of the meeting is appropriate to H u m a n

Rights W e e k s .

• S F S o c k f i lm 'Bedazzle ' , 6:30pm, ME220 , 20p to m e m

bers , 50p non-members .

• B A S F d e m o n s t r a t i n g t h e i r n e w 7130 m u l t i

tasking harddisk micro, 7:00pm, Huxley LT145 , free to

members , non-members 30p. Organised by IC Micro

computer C l u b .

• D a n c i n g C l u b B e g i n n e r s ' C l a s s , 7:30pm, J C R .

• I C C A G S o u p R u n , meet 10:30pm, Falmouth Kitchens.

Wednesday, December 9

• B l o o d D o n i n g , 10:00-12:00am and 2:00-4:00pm, U n i o n

Dining Hall .

• I n d u s t r i a l S o c visit to P h i l i p s r e s e a r c h l a b s , Redhill,

me«t 12:50 for 1:00pm at Beit A r c h . Bring travel money.

domestic point of view. To this end there are

three sub-wardens and a " shared" house

keeper who are responsib le to the Warden.

Further details can be obtained from the

present holder of the post R ichard Riley (tele

eves 373-0593) and appl icat ion forms from the

IC Union Office. Comple ted appl icat ion with

details of all relevant exper ience s h o u l d be

returned to the IC U n i o n Office no later than

Friday, December 11, 1981.

• W a r g a m e s C l u b M e e t i n g , 1 00pm, U n i o n S C R .

• D i s c u s s i o n , 1:15pm, G r e e n C o m m R m , U n i o n Build

ing. 'Socialist Standard' . W o u l d anyone who has read the

above journal and wishes to discuss its contents please

come to this meeting.

• I C T r a m p o l i n e S o c , meet 5:30pm, C o u r t a u l d Hall ,

Q E C , Carnpenden Hill R d . C o n t a c t Kristen H a n s e n ,

C h e m 2 for further details.

• D a n c i n g C l u b A l t e r n a t i v e B e g i n n e r s C l a s s , 7:30pm

J C R .

Thursday, December 10

• C h r i s t i a n S c i e n c e G r o u p m e e t i n g , 1:00pm, Seminar

R m , Level 2S, Botany.

• T h e m o n s t e r I n d u s t r i a l S o c g e n e r a l m e e t i n g with

cheese, wine and Peter Nesbitt! , 1:00pm, U n i o n U p e p r

Dining Hall .

• E n t s C o m m E l e c t o r a l M e e t i n g , 1:00pm, U n i o n U p p e r

Lounge. A lso general discussion on Ents policy.

• S F S o c L i b r a r y M e e t i n g , 1:00pm, G r e e n C o m m R m .

• N a t H i s t S o c talk by A l a n D . S e c c o m b e o n ' T h e

Seychelles' (with slides), 1:30pm, Botany Basement.

(That was a correction

• S T O I C p r o g r a m m e 'Newsbreak' , 1:00 and 6:00pm.

• D e p t o f H u m a n i t i e s p r e s e n t s

1. F i l m : T h e W o r l d at W a r ( T h a m e s T V )

Part 8 It's a Lovely day T o m o r r o w , 1:15pm, Great Hall .

2. L u n c h - h o u r C o n c e r t

T h e George C a i r d O b o e Quartet , 1:30pm, Music R m , 53

Princes Gate .

• G l i d i n g C l u b M e m b e r s , 5:30pm, A e r o 254.

• C h e m S o c l e c t u r e a n d d e m o n s t r a t i o n o n 'Dioxygen

Fixation' by Prof D . F . Evans F R S (IC7,5:30pm, C h e m L T

C .

• J S o c , 5:45pm, G r e e n C o m m R m . C o m e and hear how

university students are thrown into jail in Russia. "Is it a

crime, wanting to leave the country? "

• F i s h i n g C l u b M e e t i n g , 6:00pm, Stans Bar .

• I C C N D ; ' L o n d o n after the bomb' , 6:30pm, B r o w n C o m

mittee R m .

• B a d m i n t o n C l u b P u b C r a w l , 6:30pm, U n i o n Bar

• P u n d i t V i s h n u N a r a y a n , priest, lecturer and an

authority on H i n d u philosophy a n d culture, lectures on

the impact of Western culture on the H i n d u way of life in

Britain. 1:30pm C h e m E n g L T 2 . Admiss ion free.

It's the M i n & Met Sc i Chislehurst Caves

Underground D i s co tonight. See Rich L a w ,

Min ing 3, or come to the U n i o n Office for last

minute tickets (£4 each). Thanks to everyone

who turned n u t to play and support the rugby

and football matches last Saturday. (Congrats

a n d c o m m i s e r a t i o n s as r e l e v a n t ! ) . I hope

everyone is going to support foreign students

week events (during the last week of term),

watch out for publicity or come and see what's

going on.

A s we can't go Rag collecting for a whi le—a

Chr is tmas raffle, with proceeds going to R a g

will be organised, so make sure you've plenty

of money on you when I'm selling the tickets.

T h e C a m b o r n e l i s t c o m e s d o w n o n

December 4, T O D A Y , so put your name up

there quickly if you haven't done so yet!

Tickets for the Mines Ball are available until

December 16—don't forget to reserve a ticket.

Caynor

rfWWWWWWWIrWWWWWWWW

SCARMAN REPORT

Two copies of the Scarman Report

are now available in the Haldane Library.

v w v f w w w v u v \ r w v w w v v w w v '

t o n i t e ! * w M.

8 pm & t

j c r if|f- BAH

8 ? < U J

DiScO ,(3)

festive fun'n'games f1

Wardenship of Mining House


n

The IC Union Human Rights Week com

mences on Monday, and coincides with a

slightly more auspicious week of events

organised by the United Nations. The aim at

IC is to provide students with information

about violations of human rights in many parts

of the world. More importantly, the dynamic

clubs and societies running the events will be

illustrating what students here can do to

counter such grave abuses.

Naturally, euents will be held at lunchtimes

and during the evening. Each participating

society will be organising their own events,

ranging from a filmshow to a picket of the

Rector's pad. Unfortunately, Ihe idea of

having a Human Rights Week was suggested

only recently, meaning that the itinery of

events is not yet definite. However, at the time

of writing, here are the details, society by

society.

Socialist Society

Soc Soc is concerned about the exploitation of

Third W o r l d workers ; a particular example of

this is coffee pickers, people often receiving

less t h a n £45 per y e a r . It 's o b v i o u s that

middlemen make vast profits; mentioning no

names, but Nestles has a higher turnover than

the earnings of the vast majority of Afr ican

nations.

There is an alternative! Campaign Coffee, a

non-profit-making body supplies coffee from

Tanzania . W h e n you buy it, a large part- of

your money goes to the workers who picked

the beans for you and so rightly deserve it.

Soc Soc , believing in a fairer deal for the

Th i rd W o r l d , is selling Campaign Coffee every

lunchtime in the J C R during H . R . Week. Free

samples might even be given, just to prove the

inferiority of M r Mooney 's produce. So , come

along and start stirring for a better world.

Additionally, the society is having a speaker

from the Society for the Protect ion of the

U n b o r n C h i l d , T u e s d a y at 6 :30pm in the

G r e e n Committee R o o m . Naturally, the issue

of whether a woman's right to abortion or the

fundamental right of human life should have

the priority will be discussed.

West L o n d o n Chaplaincy

S. A m e r i c a is o n e of the w o r l d ' s m o s t

inhumane continents. Poverty, hunger and

military dictatorships make the lives of the

people there almost as bad as those of IC

students. T h e West L o n d o n Chaplaincy is

host ing a n author i tat ive speaker , recently

returned from P e r u , on this issue. The talk is

on Thursday lunchtime.

Conservative Society

Conservative Society will be holding a display

in the J C R on Thursday on human rights

violations in the U S S R .

Labour C l u b

Labour C l u b will be holding a display in the

J C R on Thursday on human rights violations

in Chi le .

Positive Alternatives to Abortion

Society

P A T A ' s display in the J C R on Thursday will be

dealing with the human rights aspect of the

abortion debate. Particular emphasis will be

placed on the unborn child's rights as dfefined

in the United Nations Declaration on the

Rights of the C h i l d , the European Convent ion

of H u m a n Rights and the decision of the West

G e r m a n supreme court which decided that

unborn children in Germany were protected

by the constitution.

Jewish Soc

W h e n leaning o n bars c a n be a little

different

Imagine the National Front has gained power

in Britain. N o w assume that you, upset by

this development, wanted to leave the country

but they won't allow it. Legally you can go but

in p r a c t i s e . . . t o u g h . 400,000 peop le have

applied, but only 400 people, this year, were

granted the permits now required to leave the

country.

Does all this sound rather unlikely? Wel l , if

y o u r e p l a c e B r i t a i n w i t h R u s s i a a n d the

National Front by the Communist Party, we

are describing a situation that exists today. If

you wish to know more about how you can be

thrown out of university when all you want to

do is leave Russia and if you want to know

what you can do to help, visit our stall in the

J C R next Thursday. It won't take you long,

busy as you are in the hectic eleven week

terms of Imperial. In Russia the terms are

somewhat longer.

U N S o c

There will definitely be a stall on Thursday in

the J C R describing the work of this new

society. A t least one speaker meeting during

the week is being held.

Islamic Society

W e will be holding a bookstall and have a

speaker on Wednesday, December 9, in the

afternoon.

Amnesty International G r o u p

The A l G r o u p will be adding a different aspect

to H u m a n Rights Week. We're holding an

hour-long filmshow, screening The Hand and

Paradise Lost. 'The H a n d ' , a short, animated

film, depicts the oppression of the individual

behind the Iron Curta in , whilst 'Paradise Lost '

focuses on Paraguay, a country ruled by

a military dictator for the past seventeen years.

Venue and time to be announced.

W e also intend to have a speaker from our

B r i t i s h s e c t i o n , e x p l a i n i n g A m n e s t y Inter

national's work. J o h n Cleese, Peter C o o k and

Kate B u s h won't be here, but someone more

knowledgable will. Definitely an evening event.

At the A l stall in the J C R , you will be able to

play in the 'Dictator 's W o r l d C u p ' (adapted

from the book Junta United). In addition,

Christmas cards will be on sale, and we'll be on

hand to explain the work we're doing on behalf

of F irmin A w a d o n . Firmin was a student, just

like you; unfortunately, the military dictator in

Benin Oust west of Nigeria) won't tolerate

discussion of his policies, and has had Firmin

imprisoned for two years now without trial.

Needless to say, the prison conditions are

disgusting. C o m e to our stall, and find out

how you can help set the world to rights.

Anti -Apartheid G r o u p

The Anti -Apartheid G r o u p is definitely holding

a picket outside the Rector 's pad next Friday

at 11:00am. This is to protest against College

p o l i c y o n S o u t h A f r i c a n g o v e r n m e n t -

sponsored students on the nuclear technology

course here. The group believes that such

students will, on their return to South Afr ica ,

actively assist in the production of nuclear

weapons.

O n a cultural level, the group is offering

students here an opportunity to appreciate

native South African art. There will be an

exhibition of paintings by children on level two

of the Sherfield Building.

Baha'i Society

Since the beginning of the Iranian revolution,

the Baha'is of the world have greviously borne

the news of the persecution of their fellow

believers in that country. The largest religious

minority in Iran, the Baha' i faith has been

excluded from the new constitution.

O n a large scale, holy places have been

destroyed, many Baha'is executed, and private

property looted and burned. Life savings have

b e e n c o n f i s c a t e d , a n d the e n t i r e B a h a ' i

community is subjected to many forms of

discrimination, humiliation, and violence.

The Baha' i faith is a world religion with its

o w n s c r i p t u r e s , l a w s a n d c a l e n d a r . It

r e p r e s e n t s a c r o s s - s e c t i o n of h u m a n i t y ,

including almost every nationality and trade.

The central teachings are the oneness of G o d ,

religion and mankind. The terrible persecution

now being witnessed in Iran stems from an

i n t o l e r a n t a t t i t u d e o n t h e p a r t of t h e

authorities there. The Baha'i Society will be

holding a speaker meeting on the subject of

Baha'is in Iran next Thursday at 1:00pm, in

Lecture Theatre 213, Huxley Building.

Catholic Society

Cathol ic Society is using the theme of equality

for H u m a n Rights Week , believing that nobody

should be discriminated against as a result of

their race, creed or culture. T o this end, the

society is holding a stall next Thursday in the

J C R .

Cathol ic Society is helping to give people in

Tanzania the right to food. Unfortunately, our

s p o n s o r e d wa lk to ra ise funds for a fish

farming project is not being held next week,

but in early M a r c h . However, the stall should

have more information about this.


IC Bookshop If by a slim chance we haven't yet been able

to supply the book, or even books, you wish

to give as presents this Christmas, we do

stock book tokens from 50p. These can be

redeemed in any bookshop in the British

Isles.

Reference F E L I X 596, I did hear on the

radio that a bill will be before Parliament in .

the new year to legalise brothels!

Diaries are useful "stocking fillers". W e

have a large selection for 1982. Also , we

have the C o l l e g e d i a r y at £1.50, w h i c h

c o v e r s the a c a d e m i c year S e p t e m b e r -

October .

Book-A-Book this Christmas

Penguin Complete Sherlock Holmes Sir

A r t h u r C o n a n Doyle , Penguin £3.95

Gossip 1920-1970 A n d r e w B a r r o w , P a n

£3.95

Complete Atlas of Britain A u t o m o b i l e

Associat ion, £9.95

James Herriot's Yorkshire Michael Joseph

£8.50

Phaidon Dictionary of 20th Century Art

Phaidon £4.50

Puzzle Mountain Gyles Brandreth , Penguin

£4.95

Motor Cyclists' Handbook, David Minton ,

Pan £5.95

S e c o n d Book of Insults Nancy M c P h e e ,

Deutsch £3.95

MacmillanEncylopediaof Art M a c m i l l a n

£5.95

Queen Victoria' Sketchbook M a c m i l l a n

£3.95.

Thomas Bewick's Birds G o r d o n Fraser

£4.95

Marilyn lives! Joe l Oppenheimer, Pipeline

£5.95

Bargain Basement

Traditional Islamic Craft in Moroccan

Architecture V1&2 £180.00 now £130.00.

History of World Furniture £40 .00 now

£35.00.

Special Announcement

W e d n e s d a y , D e c e m b e r 9, at 2 : 3 0 p m

S u b j e c t G r o u p C a p t a i n S i r D o u g l a s

B a d e r — A u t h o r Laddie Lucus will both be in

the Bookshop to sign copies of the only

authorised biography of Sir Douglas Bader,

Flying Colours, Hutch inson , £8.95.

The book contains a new and contro

versial assessment of the Battle of Britain.

T h e a u t h o r e x p o s e s for the f irst t ime

Douglas Bader 's tactical concept of the

battle and his critics are decisively answered

with facts and fresh official evidence.

If by unfortunate chance you will not be

able to come and meet Sir Douglas Bader

but you would like the book signed, let me

know and we will get them to sign for you.

Socialist Which Brit ish political party has twelve M P s ,

several hundred councillors and an individual

membership of 15,000?

The answer is the Co-operative Party. The

co-operative movement is perhaps best known

for its familiar high street shops run by local

co-operative retail societies and schemes like

the Meriden Motorcyc le Co-operative. Few

people are aware of its political wing. O n

T u e s d a y , D e c e m b e r 8, P e t e r C l a r k e , a

r e s e a r c h o f f i c e r at C o - o p e r a t i v e P a r t y

headquarters will be speaking about its aims

and, in particular, its novel scheme for tackling

youth unemployment through self-supporting

groups.

The meeting is at 1:00pm in Maths 341 and

all are welcome.

Ents O K , it's Friday already and you still haven't

bought your 'Almost X m a s Party ' ticket. Y o u

can still get them (only £1) from the Ents Room

or Hall Reps—see Hall noticeboards. The

band at tonight's party is a pop/reggae band

called 'Bumble and the Beez '—have you ever

heard a reggae band use electronic drums

before?! They recently supported both Haze l

O ' C o n n o r and J o h n M ar tyn on their British

tours and their single is already in the charts.

Forthcoming events include a 'Heavy Rock '

night (next Friday) with 'Overki l l ' and 'Blue

M a n ' in the Lower Refectory—we would like to

thank M a r k Smith for moving the venue of the

F E L I X Dinner to allow this event to take place!

A n ' X m a s . . . . a t last ' par ty is a lso be ing

organised for Wednesday, December 16, in

the Concert Hal l . There will be a disco, bar,

rock b a n d — A Blue Zoo (more about them

later) and.. . .and wait for it . . . .cartoons!—all for

just £1. For just 50p, this Thursday's film is

Taxi Driver.

A s you will see elsewhere in F E L I X today,

n e x t T h u r s d a y we a r e h a v i n g o f f i c i a l

elections at 1:00pm in the Upper Lounge. If

you're at al! interested, please come along as

there will also be a general discussion about

entertainments at IC .

SF Soc What does the devil do in his spare time? How

unsmoothly is it possible for the course of true

love to run? If you want a right good belly laugh

and a solution to the problem of evil, then go to

Bedazzled, the next S F Soc film on Tuesday in

M e c h Eng 220 at 6:30pm. If comedy and

theology aren't your bag, then don't forget that

Raquel W e l c h is in it (as well as Peter C o o k ,

Dudley Moore , Barry Humphries and Eleanor

Bron) . Definitely a film redolent with not-to-be-

missedness.

While on the subject of films, it has been

brought to my attention that Ents think I don't

like them. Nothing could be further from the

truth. A l l my past statements about them were

g e n u i n e e x p r e s s i o n s of s y m p a t h y a n d

gratitude for blokes with a hard job who so

often are blamed when things go wrong and

are not mentioned at all when things go right. I

was not b e i n g s a r c a s t i c at a l l , a n d was

dismayed to learn that I was being taken the

wrong way, which comes as a bit of a blow to a

person as articulate as I am. Sti l l , life's like that.

N o jokes this week, and for several weeks no

by-line either. Depressing isn't it?

CND Wing Chun

In Chinese history Buddhism and Shaolin

temple are synonymous with K u n g F u . W i n g

C h u n K u n g F u has its roots here. A Buddhist

nun, who after observing a fight between a

white crane and snake devised a system of self-

defence from the action of these animals. She

took into account the difference in physique

between men and women when she created

the art, whose close range techniques have

simple yet fast and lethal moves.

Master Y ip M a n introduced the art to H o n g

K o n g after the Second W o r l d War . Througb

his students (such as Bruce Lee and Master

Lau) Wing C h u n gradually spread across to

the western world. Master Lau is one of the

leading exponents in W i n g C h u n .

The IC Wing C h u n C lub is a division of

M a s t e r L a u ' s W i n g C h u n A c a d e m y . T o

celebrate the birth of our club recently we

have arranged a social evening on December

12, at 7:00pm, in the Union Building.

The programme includes a demonstration of

Wing C h u n K u n g F u by Master L a u , food,

drinks, raffle, music and party games.

If you are interested, hurry and get your

ticket from Sandeep Jesndasen C i v Eng 3,

Edgar Pilkington E E 1 , Benny Notarianni Phys

3, Un ion Office.

Wing C h u n classes are held on Wednesdays

in the Un ion G y m between 3:00 and 6:00pm;

and Saturdays in the Union G y m between

11:00 and 2:00pm

The meeting of Thursday, November 26, was

addressed by M i k e Terry , an active member of

A n t i - A p a r t h e i d . M i k e p r e s e n t e d a h igh ly

i n f o r m a t i v e a c c o u n t o n the h i s t o r y a n d

prospects of nuclear proliferation in South

Afr ica .

Unquestionable evidence was presented for

the existence of a South African bomb, along

with disturbing developments in battlefield

nuclear shells and weapon delivery systems.

Mike laid the blame directly with the U S and

British policies to provide large amounts of

technological assistance for so-called "peaceful

development of nuclear reactor facilities".

W o r k is now beginning on the production of

leaflets a n d eventual ly a larger and more

c o m p r e h e n s i v e n e w s p a p e r . H o w e v e r it is

essential that people offer to help in the writing

of these. If you would like to contribute in teh

form of articles, cartoons, format, or whatever,

please send your ideas to C . J . Harries , M e c h

Eng P G , so that we may consider them and tell

you if we think it's worth doing.

A n I C C N D Bookshop is now set up in the

J C R e v e r y M o n d a y l u n c h t i m e . P l e a s e go

along, and, more importantly encourage those

who remain undecided to pay it a visit.

The final meeting of term, on Thursday,

December 10, will be addressed by O w e n

Greene , who many of you will know, has been

working with the " L o n d o n After The B o m b "

S A N A group. He will be talking about some

of the group's preliminary findings.

H.G. Wells Society proudly presents

JIM FRANCIS creator of Special Effects for

'THE HITCH HIKERS GUIDE TO

THE GALAXY'


Natural History The society organise regular lectures, trips and

films. So far this term we have had Professor

Smyth and Doc tor L a m b give lectures on

parasites from pets and wine-making. W e

organised an afternoon trip to S i lwood Park

field station to introduce first year life scientists

to the station and the work that is done there

and two groups from the society went around

the Brit ish M u s e u m (Natural History) during

its open days. S o far this term we have been on

four bird-watching rips. A t Rickmansworth , we

had good views of siskins and redpolls and at

Barn Elms Reservoir we saw goldeneye and a

kestrel at very close range. W e have also been

further afield; at Rainham in Essex we saw

bramblings and a hen harrier despite being

under fire from the local army ranges! A t

Sheppey on the N o r t h Kent coast we saw

another hen harrier and a short-eared owl,

purple sandpiper and flocks of wintering snow

buntings.

C o m i n g up we have a lecture by M r A .

Seccombe on 'The Wildlife of the Seychelles '

and an R S P B film accompanied by cider and

cheese. N e x t term we have already organised

lectures on Butterflies by Prof E . Laithwaite,

Polution by Doc tor D . Dolby , and Schisto

somes by D r C . Wright.

Community Action If any one is interested in any of the following

come to the meetings, top of the U n i o n , every

M o n d a y at 12:30: draughtproofing o ld people's

homes on Wednesday, December 9 in the

a f t e r n o o n ; h e l p i n g w i t h the c h i l d r e n of

b a t t e r e d w i v e s , t a k i n g t h e m to s i g h t s i n

L o n d o n , e t c . ; h e l p i n g w i t h h a n d i c a p p e d

children on Saturday afternoons; soup rtins on

T u e s d a y a n d T h u r s d a y , m e e t 1 0 : 3 0 p m ,

F a l m o u t h K i t c h e n s ; visit ing pat ients in S t

Pancras Hospital or taking them out on trips.

N e x t Tuesday and Wednesday, November 8

and 9, it's b l o o d d o n i n g . Please give your

blood, it is needed.

Economy Drive

"Student dr iver "—this produces images of a

beat-up M i n i , doing wheel spin starts at traffic

lights. Wel l C i t y and Gui lds M o t o r C l u b does

like to try other things as well. F o r example on

the 29th of this month it is organising an

Econorun .

Translated out of jargon this means that

competitors will be trying to squeeze every last

mile out of each gallon. Fol lowing a challenging

route from easy navigation. S o tbe event is not

only a competition in its own right, but also an

excellent introduction to rallying.

I can hear some of you saying " B u t my

L a n d Rover only ever does 17 miles to the

gallon." W e l l , to make things fair, your result is

compared to accepted consumption figures for

the model.

So , if you fancy stripping off the roof-rack,

winding up the windows and trying not to lose

any speed on the corners, why not enter.

If you have images of throwing around a fully

p r e p a r e d R S 1 8 0 0 , b u t have n e v e r d r i v e n

competitively, why not come along.

Details from the M o t o r C l u b noticeboard in

Mechanica l Engineering.

Y o u might even enjoy driving economically!

L — . v . '

§ Rugby

Seconds O n Wednesday the Second X V travel led into

the sticks to play the R o y a l Vets Col lege.

W h e n the referee eventual ly turned up the

game started w i t h I C dominat ing .

Aggressive play by the forwards set up the

ba l l for the backs who, despite changes of

posit ion, r a n the ba l l we l l , end ing in the left

winger R . F r i t h scoring two tries, a n d the

right winger R . F l y n n scoring one. T w o of

them were converted by M . Winsor .

T h e vets c a p i t a l i z e d o n a l u l l i n the

enthusiasm in the second quarter a n d ran in

two converted tries. These were probably due

to players be ing confused by technical l ine-

out calls l ike 'bovine mastitis ' !

A f t e r the i n t e r v a l I C r e g a i n e d t h e i r

confidence a n d played most of the remain ing

game in the opposit ion half a n d w i t h good

forward support the ba l l was moved a long

the backs, l ead ing to R . F r i t h scoring his

t h i r d try.

F r o m a we l l tuned penalty move W . Aston

crashed over the l ine to score a n d w i t h M .

W i n s o r convert ing this a n d a later penalty,

Imper ia l were the eventual winners by 29-12.

T e a m : M. Winsor, R. Frith, G. Pike, W.

Chapman, R. Flynn, M. Thompson, J. Paixdo, S.

Bell, C. Cole, J. Hutton, C. Henderson, T. Carr,

D. McGee, W. Aston, M. Pearce.

Judo W e a r r i v e d b r i g h t a n d e a r l y f o r t h e

t o u r n a m e n t w h i c h w a s a n i n v i t a t i o n

tournament between teams from universities

i n E u r o p e . T h e c o m p e t i t i o n s t a r t e d at

10:30am a n d we were d r a w n in a pool w i t h

D i j o n , Bochen a n d E i n d h o v e n 2 (the home B

team). W e were at a slight disadvantage as

we only had a six m a n team so in any contest

we lost the first bout by default, also our team

consisted of two brown, two green a n d two

orange belts whereas a l l of the other teams

were m a i n l y black belts.

W e were d r a w n to light Bochen lirst and

made a val iant effort, w i n n i n g two lights; the

losing members o f the team put up incred ib ly

good opposit ion and their loss can be b lamed

on lack ol compet i t ion experience.

Next we (ought D i j o n and in the t rad i t ion

of Fr en ch clubs they were very good, we-only

managed one draw, this time some of the

blame can be la id on bad refcreeing as we got

two bad decisions.

In the last light in out pool against one ol

the home learns wc managed one t h a w a n d

sullen-d greatly from la< k ol experience.

There ended the competi t ion lor us so

missing the final 'wc were showering ; which

Strasbourg won. then retired to the Street of a.

T h o u s a n d Bats lot a quiel dr ink . Il was

g e n e r a l l y d e c i d e d that the n a m fought

incredib ly wel l , perhaps next year wc may do

better.

Football

Firsts T o be sung to the tune of " R o b i n H o o d "

1. Bogey R o l l a , Bogey R o l l a wi th his pad and

pen

Bo g e y - Ro l l a , B o g e y - R o l l a leaving from South

K e n

W i t h the I C team

Just to set the scene

Col l iers W o o d , Col l iers W o o d , Col l iers W o o d

(Chelsea).

2. Stevie W a r d , Stevie W a r d j u m p i n g for the

ba l l

Stevie W a r d , Stevie W a r d up above them al l

B a l l hits his head

Goalkeeper dead

Stevie W a r d , Stevie W a r d , Stevie W a r d

(Goal!)

(Chelsea Scored)

3. G . R i c k a r d , G . R i c k a r d star of I C Firsts

G . R i c k a r d , G . R i c k a r d only comes in bursts

(or so we hear)

.Dressed a l l in blue

H e managed two (or so we hear)

G . R i ckat d, G . R i c k a r d , G . R i c k a r d (Goal(s))

4. S. D u n h i l l , S. D u n h i l l l ike an antelope

5. D u n h i l l , S. D u n h i l l ful l back couldn ' t cope

Crossed just in t ime

G o a l i e said it's mine

G o a l i e missed, C o a l i e d missed, must be pissed

(another goal)

( O R A N G E S )

5. D a v i d D e a n , D a v i d D e a n cover ing a l l the

grass

D a v i d D e a n , D a v i d D e a n fell upon his bottom

(again)

M a l c o m hit a shot (low)

G o a l i e not too hot

Stevie W a r d , Stevie W a r d , followed in (yet

another goal)

6. C o r n e r shot, corner shot c o m i n g from the

right

A l e d calls, A l e d calls, w i t h his impa i red sight

A led ' s out a mi le

Chelsea's a l l a smile

'Cause they scored, 'cause they scored, cause

they scored.

7. Bo g e y - Ro l l a , B o g e y - R o l l a sat on the tra in

(tube really) (Too late hee-hee!)

B o g e y - R o l l a , B o g e y - R o l l a felt a l ittle pa in

Looks d o w n below

It's a l l aglow

R a s h is worse, rash is worse, rash is worse

C o p y r i g h t — V e r g i n

Seconds H a r t l a n d (10)

Y e e n m a n (4)

Wigg ins (2)

Elsby (2)

Beer (1)

(PS: J i m missed a sitter, Steve's knees got

co ld , ' 19 -0 to IC. )


A C C M e e t i n g : on Tuesday, December 8,

6:30pm in the U n i o n Refectory. W i l l al l c lub

captains and women's captains please attend.

T h i s w i l l be followed bv a Stoats' R u n .

R E S U L T S

wimmmg I C prosed that they are the best squad in

L J L U by virtue of a br i l l iant performance at

the U L U Championsh ips on November 19.

The men's team won the men's trophy and

the women's team had representation in most

finals.

R i c h a r d L e a c h almost 'stole' the 33m

d a s h , t h e n took first p l a c e i n the 100 m

backstroke . N i c k L a s t a n d Steve T a y l o r

f i n i s h e d s e c o n d a n d t h i r d i n . the 4 0 0 m

freestyle. W h e n R i c h f inally ran out of energy

(i.e. couldn ' t finish the 100m butterfly), P a u l

Rodgers fought his way into th ird place.

G r a h a m Singleton also picked up points with

a th i rd in the 100m backstroke. J im Boucher,

the learn coach, finished fifth in the I . M . and

th i rd in the breaststroke.

T h e girls, some of w h o m were compet ing

for the first time, produced some excellent

swims. W e n d y M o o r e and C a r o l i n e Tombs

led the way wi th C a r o l i n e taking third place

in the 200m freestyle and I M whi le W e n d y

finished fourth in the 33m dash and the I M .

O t h e r notables were J a n e C a m p b e l l in the

backstroke final and M a r i a T u c k who was

fourth in the 100m breastroke.

The men's A team won the medley relay,

w i th our B team a close second. In the

freestyle relay the A team were second to

Bedford College as R i c h let his k id brother

beat h i m on the final leg.

T e a m : .V. Last. R. I.each. J. Boiuhci. C.

('•avion, P. Rodger.-,, G. Singleton + 2.

.V. Hammond, II'. Moore, (,'. lorn Irs, J.

Hillier, J. Campbell, M. Tuck, Francui.se and

Man.

©Mater Polo I C W a t e r Polo team followed up the success

of the s w i m m i n g team by w i n n i n g the U L U

knock-out last Thursday at U L U . W e were

handicapped by a number of goals to give

weaker sides (i.e. the rest!) a chance.

E a r l y on we disposed of L o n d o n Hosp i ta l

4-1. with goals from Ch r i s and. R i c h a r d ; and

K i n g s / L S E combinat ion 3-1. N i c k scoring

three goals.

T h e final took place over four quarters and

due to h a n d i c a p p i n g we started the match

8-2 down to Bedford Col lege.

I C started wel l , reducing the deficit to

three goals after the first quarter , and we only

trai led by two goals at the end of the second.

A l t h o u g h Bedford's G B international took

over in the th ird and we went 5 down at one

stage, our fitness and teamwork enabled us to

light back to be 13-10 down wi th 1 quarter to

play. Due to br i l l iant shooting we forced exl i a

t ime wi th the score 14-14 at the end of

n o r m a l time.

T h e first period ol extra time was scoreless

but I C took the lead for the first time in the

match early in the second period. A l t h o u g h

Bedford equalised, C h r i s c l inched the winner

for us shortly afterwards.

T e a m : Leach, Boucher, Gallon, (,'asini,

Ashuin, Burnett, Edwards, Hef'jernan, Roberts,

Lasl.

W e d n e s d a y , N o v e m b e r 25

F o o t b a l l

IC I vs Chelsea I 5-2'A,

IC II vs Bedford III 19-0 A

IC III vs Bedford II 9-2 A

R u g b y

IC I

IC II

Royal Veterinary College' I 8-9(A ;

Roval Veterinary Col II 29-12TAJ

B a d m i n t o n

L a d i e s vs K i n g s 3-6(H)

S a t u r d a y , N o v e m b e r 28

F o o t b a l l

IC I vs I 'C I 1 -0i H

IC III vs L'C III 2-5(H)

IC VI vs I 'C V 3-3(H)

H o c k e y

IC 1 vs Borough Rd Coll 0-()(A)

IC II vs L'xbridge G-3(H)

IC III VS Bank ol England l-2(A)

R u g b y

IC I vs Hon. A n i l . Coy. I '-9(H)

IC II vs Hon. A n i l . Coy. II 4-2()(H)

B a d m i n t o n

IC 11 vs Q E C l-8(H)

Bowling O n F r i d a y , N o v e m b e r 27. twelve bowlers

made their way to B i r m i n g h a m to compete in

the B i r m i n g h a m M a r a t h o n . B o w l i n g non-stop

from midnight F r i d a y to midday Saturday ,

a l l in aid of the N S P C C .

A l t e r a brief (?) warming -up period in the

bar, the two teams took their lanes.

IC. I , had a slow start, but w a r m e d - u p

quickly and reached a peak at about 5:00am

when Steve Bryer bowled the team's high

game ol 223, for which he won a bottle of

wine. F r o m then on the game levelled o i l '

wi th the team finishing 7th overall w i th

14.548 pins.

I C II had a good start and a good finish

and . apart from K e v i n Short who bowled

well a l l morn ing and got the team's high

score of 177. not very m u c h happened. T h e

(earn came 14th overall (out of 15) (thanks to

Brunei C . w'ho came last) and scored 12,128

pins.

IC I team: Ray Cook, Chris Wells, Paul

Gear. Martin Harrison, Wai Cheong Man, Steve

III If7.

IC II team: Martin Smith. Kevin Short,

Marie Cheong. Colin Grant, Mark Stanley, Hobby

I hong.

Q Sailing T h e IC team were not up at the H a r p being

beaten last w e e k e n d — i n s t e a d they were

being beaten at C a m b r i d g e .

H a v i n g travelled down in ant i c ipat ion of

sai l ing " z o o m s " (the new boat C a m b r i d g e

have on approval) on a decent lake. W e

found ourselves sai l ing decomposing, leaky

" L a r k s " on a duck pond down a muddy lane

in die midd le of a wood. T h e trees around the

lake made the w i n d unbel ievably shifty and

light in certain areas.

A l l credit to C a m b r i d g e who managed to

spot the headers that you could almost tack

on without m o v i n g the til ler.

T e a m : Anita and Pal; Graham A . and

Graham I).; Julian and Jim.

Football

Firsts T h e game began

H a r l i n g t o n again the venue.

Elsby m a k i n g his debut.

R o u g h stuff by Dean=booking.

A h k l e injury the result.

Scored, v ia Dean tho' he fell down

•Hal l t ime (no oranges,

Reeve pirouetted like Nureyev.

E x c i t i n g stuff!

T a n t r u m s from Xicco l l s .

U C try to score—

Resi l ience pays o i l .

N o w is the end (we w o n ! .

Spot the message.

ft Hockey

Seconds T h e seconds mainta ined their fine run this

weekend, w i th a conv inc ing win over local

r i v a l s U x b r i d g e . F o l l o w i n g the shock o f

hav ing eleven players, an umpire a n d seeing

A n d y G a r m s is a suit and tie; the team made

its o w n w a y to H a r l i n g t o n ; M r G r a y

strategically placed next to T i m M i t c h e l l ' s

girl fr iend (Hope you're not reading this,

Dana! ) .

S t i l l i n s h o c k , the d e I e n c e a l l o w e d

U x b r i d g e to take the lead, but a goalkeeping

e r r o r a l l o w e d T i m to e q u a l i s e a l m o s t

i m m e d i a t e l y — p r o b a b l y due to h i m hav ing

his thighs massaged as a pre -match warm-up !

T e a m spirit consequently rose and by the

interval we were two goals up through an

excellent goal by A n d y G a r m s and a W y l i e

Special .

In a l l a line a l l - round performance by the

t e a m , e s p e c i a l l y M r S t r o o m e r , w h o s e

t y p i c a l l y - a i m l e s s r u n s a n d c o n s e q u e n t

demol ishing of the U x b r i d g e defence were an

inspirat ion to a l l . Thanks to A r t h u r for p i tch

A and to Sarah for T i m ' s performance!

T e a m : Jones, Cunningham, Whitehead,

Ramplon, Roessink, Stroomer (Capt), Garms, Gray,

Mitchell, Wylie. Umpire: Mike.

Ladies Today , we decided to have another bash at

beating W y e and even managed to put out a

team of e leven players for the occas ion .

However it was a disastrous game a n d we

were soundly beaten (5-2) — it's a pity we

didn ' t play as wel l as we d i d against them last

week. S t i l l , it wasn't a total waste of time

because Wye are a fr iendly bunch and gave

us a lovely tea and we had a super ride

through the K e n t countryside. W e arr ived so

early that we had time lor a fifteen mile

detour to sec al l those golden cornfields and

ro l l ing hillsides. F u l l marks to the driver for

some inventive manoeuvr ing a long some very

tricky country lanes (I hope his cough gets

better). M a n y thanks to Johnson for the

constructive cr i t ic ism (and for umpir ing) .

Team: .1. Conies, .1 . Longslajj, .1. Crumhie,

.1 . Wall, M Storey, S. Halbard, A'. Barnell, R.

Lane, C. Brown, J. Birbeck, S. Crocker.


http://Francui.se

rldMd

Q E C - I C Merger

Even though the statement issued this week

was only a draft proposal to be put to both the

governing bodies, it is quite obvious that as

both principals have accepted the draft it will

undoubtedly be the basis for any merger. Thus

the students of this College must make their

views known.

The draft proposal would seem to suggest

that the biosciences from Imperial College

would be combined with the food and nutrition,

courses at Q E C to form a fourth Constituent

College. I for one think that we should not kiss

the L i fe S c i e n c e s d i v i s i o n g o o d b y e as a

s a c r i f i c i a l l a m b to save Q E C . T h e R o y a l

College of Science of necessity must include

the Life Sciences and already has a strong

r e p u t a t i o n a n d t r a d i t i o n i n t h i s f i e l d .

Establishing a fourth constituent college which

would not have any real status (initially) by

chopping off a lump of R C S seems ludicrous,

especially as R C S already has the status.

A n emergency U G M has been called for

which will take place next Thursday. This is

the only way in which the U n i o n can form

p o l i c y w i t h the d i r e c t i n v o l v e m e n t of the

students involved. It is up to you , the students,

to turn up and make your feelings clear.

I sympathise with the plight of Q E C , who

have been hit very hard by the cuts and must

s t rugg le to s u r v i v e . B u t in k e e p i n g the i r

identity, we must not lose ours.

Come along to the Emergency U G M

being called for next week and let your

views be known.

Bound Editions

Those people who took the wise decision to

invest in a bound copy of last year's F E L I X will

be delighted to know that they have arrived.

These can be collected from the office and

reminders will be sent to those who ordered

them.

The Knocking Shop

Still no response from the College about the

a w f u l l y e m b a r r a s s i n g r e f e c t o r y flat i n the

U n i o n Q u a d . However , I note a bill before

Parliament to legalise brothels, so I suppose

M r M o o n e y c o u l d t a k e a d v a n t a g e of the

situation and open a profitable outlet in the

U n i o n Building! W e could whell in Lampost L i l

a n d B a c k l a n d B r e n d a a n d have a rea l l y

w o n d e r f u l t ime a n d it w o u l d p r o b a b l y be

cheaper than his horrible beefburgers.

Douglas Bader

I'm delighted to see that Douglas Bader and

the author of his official biography (Laddie

Lucas) will be signing copies of the said tome in

the IC Bookshop next Wednesday afternoon.

See Bookshop News (page 9) for details.

The Sound of Silence

Surprise , surprise! Still not a word about the

beef pasties which Mooney has been selling as

lamb for G o d knows how long. Surely this sort

of mistake requires not only an apology but a

public explanation. After al l , there are several

groups in College who have been extremely

offended by the whole affair. M r Mooney , on

the other hand, is obviously not treating the

matter seriously.

If I have not received an explanation or

denial by Monday (to print next week) then I

suppose I shall be free to pronounce that M r

M o o n e y is p e r s o n a l l y r e s p o n s i b l e , as he

obviously, cares little for the thoughts (or

stomachs) of the students at Imperial College.

So own up V i c — w e r e they lamb or not? If

n o t , w h y n o t ? O r are y o u too s c a r e d to

explain.

Credits

M y thanks once again to Lesly, Peter, J .

M a r t i n , M a r t i n , Paul , Christ ine and Adr ian .

A s p e c i a l t h a n k - y o u to P a t r i c k (guest

w r i t e r ! ) a n d a l l the w o n d e r f u l c o l l a t o r s

(especially Izy).

Blanche and Melanie were deep in thought

over a chess game when Wodge entered the

r o o m and wandered over to the board to

watch. Blanche , as usual, was white and after a

few minutes thought, she played a move,

giving the position shown in the diagram. Wi th

more than his customary politeness, Wodge

waited till the game was over before he started

making comments .

Melanie (Black)

p § • 11 i

I IP m H ±

1 §§ m 1 Iff i n §§ H P

i l l H H IP §§ • m

1 i § § j i i i

• EBB u H Blanche (White)

" D i d you realise that from the position when

I entered the room, Blanche could force mate

in three moves?" he enquired.

Melanie looked suspicious. " D o e s it use any

of the funny, obscure rules of chess?"

Wodge laughed, "the only ' funny' rules, as

you call them, are castling and the en passant

r u l e , a n d n e i t h e r of t h e m is p a r t i c u l a r l y

o b s c u r e o r d i f f i c u l t ; t h e y ' r e j u s t a l i t t l e

s u r p r i s i n g w h e n y o u c o m e a c r o s s t h e m

unexpectedly in puzzles. But there's no en

passant involved here."

" W h a t about castling?"

"I think you've had enough c lues , " grinned

Wodge. "Le t ' s see you find this mate in three."

What was the position when Wodge entered

the room? What move did Blanche play? What

should she have played? A n d how did Wodge

deduce that this leads to mate in three? 'Mate

in three' , of course, means that White plays a

move, then B lack , then White , then Black , and

then White mates.

Solutions, comments, criticisms to me at the

FELIX Office, please. A prize of £5 (donated

by Mend-a-Bike) and two tickets to the IC

Choir concert will go to the correct solution

drawn at 1:00pm on Wednesday.

Last Week's Solution

There are two solutions (without counting rota

tions and reflections) and the diagram shows

the less obvious one. Tracy Carter , C i v E n g 1,

can collect her prize on Monday afternoon.

Honourable mention for Antony Broadbent,

Physics 2, who was the only one to find both

solutions.

Sportsmanship

W h e n I've set easy puzzles in the past, it has

been obvious that one or two people have

submitted duplicate entries, either under their

own names (!) or names of collaborators. N o w

while I grudgingly admit that there's nothing to

stop solvers showing their friends the solution,

I'm a little annoyed when such unfair practices

reach the point they did this week, with several

sets of duplicate entries, and even reports of

one mercenary (whom 1 won't name) selling

the solution in return for an extortionate 75%

share of the winnings.

S o to protect the interests of those who

solve and enter legitimately, any of you who

are discovered perpetrating unsportsmanlike

s c h e m e s i n f u t u r e w i l l f i n d y o u r s e l v e s

blacklisted, and all your entries will go straight

in the bin . I realise, of course, that such

measures cannot prevent malpractice, but it

w i l l at l e a s t f o r c e y o u to d i s g u i s e y o u r

handwriting on duplicate entries.

Christmas Competition

Inspired by M r Humphr ies ' superb letter on

page 2, I'm offering a litre of wine and a large

Chr is tmas p u d for the best anagram of any

C o l l e g e p e r s o n a l i t y , b u i l d i n g , i n s t i t u t i o n ,

domestic secretary, etc., etc. Clos ing date is

M o n d a y week, 1:00pm, and 'best' means 'most

appropriate, witty, succinct, e t c '

Other News

T h a n k s to the choir for the extra prize this

week . T h e t i ckets will be in the winner 's

pigeonhole by Wednesday evening.

T h a n k s too, to G r e y Spider for this week's

puzzle . After a run of easy ones, this one is

good a n d difficult!

Finally, I forgot to tell you that the text I

encoded in the 'triangle' puzzle four weeks ago

is the first page of K i t Wil l iams ' 'Masquerade' .

FELIX is published by the Editor for and on behalf of the Imperial College Union Publications Board, and is printed by the Union Print Unit, Prince

Consort Road, London SW7 2BB (589-5111 ext 1048 int 2881) Copyright FELIX 1981. Editor: M A Smith, Advertising Manager: S M Giblin.

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