The Over-Zealous Sort

They‟ve written perfect position papers and might even have sent them in early. You can tell they‟ve arrived when you spot large stacks of filed notes and research—this sight might make you mildly nauseated. Their placards are per-petually raised, and you wonder if you‟ll ever get the sound of their infuriating voices out of your head. Every tiny and useless detail about their countries will be known to them, and they can be found pompously holding forth on the agenda in a corner of the room during breaks. They‟ve mas-tered the pretentious art of speaking in third person as if they do it everyday and will probably win a few awards. If you‟re this sort, watch out for others like you— the battle will be fierce. And if you‟re not, we suggest you become friends with them—you can pick their brains when you‟re clueless about what‟s going on.

The Lazy Kind

They saunter into the room late, hands in their pockets and indifferent looks on their faces. All that will change once they‟re made to dance or entertain the committee in some way by evil exec board members. The excitement having died down, they‟ll

head to their desks and the session will resume. All will be well till someone spots one of them dozing off or chuckling at a note from one of their like-minded friends. This chit might be read out by a member of the exec board if there is a lull in proceedings and the delegates need to be livened up by a laugh at someone else‟s expense, or might be collected by a satisfied reporter for subsequent publication in The MUN Gazette. This sort of delegate will probably use every opportunity they can get their hands on to make an alleged trip to the washroom, and will not return to the committee unless caught by a teacher in the corridor.

SHRI MUN 2014

WEDNESDAY, 16TH APRIL, 2014

ISSUE I

THE MUN GAZETTE

THIS ISSUE CONTAINS :

THE CLASSIFICATION

OF DELEGATES

1

INTRODUCING THE

EXECUTIVE BOARD

2

FROM THE RECORDS

OF AN UNDERCOVER

REPORTER

3

SNAPSHOTS : MUN

2014 S IMULATIONS

4

The Fashionable Type

They‟re impeccably dressed and there is a distinct possibility they spent more time choo-sing their outfits than they did researching (excluding, of course, those superhumans who found enough time to be walking-talking encyclopaedias dressed to the nines). The fema-les who belong to this category probably started off the day in sky-high heels. Fast-forward six hours and the situation is considerably different: their feet are sore and they are walking around school barefoot, holding their beautiful shoes in their hands. You know you‟ve spotted one when you can hear a teacher yelling at them for this.

Your average, run-of-the-mill, typical delegate can be sorted into three broad categories. Read our classification to see where you fit in, or if you‟re a novice MUNer, to learn how to identify each of these unique kinds. However, there will be people who fit into more than one, which might make it a little trickier to determine how to go about work-ing with them.

The Classification of Delegates

Secretary-General Rifka Verma finds that the resolution making process is what she enjoys most in an MUN, as it‟s the time when something meaningful is created. She advises delegates to research well, but to use this infor-mation to improvise during session based on what course the debate is taking.

HRC Chair Urvashi Kapila is a student of Political Science (B.A. second year) at Miranda House, New Delhi. She was President of her school MUN club and has participated in twenty-six MUNs.

PAGE 2 THE MUN GAZETTE

Deputy Secretary-General and GA Director Ishaan Vasudeva has a peculiar habit of declaring war on countries and then withdrawing his statement as soon as the crisis strikes. But we doubt he‟ll be doing that this time because despite his short attention span, he is clearly taking the issues of drug legalization and the Syrian crisis very se-riously.

GA Rapporteur Vishnu Chopra says his friends describe himself as really good looking. As revenge for being made to do the Harlem Shake in a previous MUN, he might inflict the same pain on delegates who choose to extend their lunch break beyond reasonable limits.

HSC Rapporteur Aditya Maru‟s music of choice is the election jingles on the radio, drawing on his Gujarati roots we presume—ab ki baar Maru sarkar. Even if he could wear anything to the MUN, he’d still pick a suit, because as our eloquent Head Boy puts it, “world leaders are supposed to look, well... leaderish...” .

Deputy Secretary-General and HSC Director Mehar Sawhney is a whirlwind of activity who will be travelling back in time as the HSC attempts to resolve the Cuban Missile Crisis of 1962. With countless MUNs under her belt, this MUNer knows what she‟s doing.

Even though HRC Director Mehar Uppal lives on a lavish diet of shoots and leaves, she will still have the ener-gy to blow her fuse at any impertinent delegate. But if you repeatedly refer to yourself as the delegate of a country not your own, you will have her empathy because she‟s been there and done that.

GA Chair Anuj Gandhi is in the second year of the Bachelor‟s Programme in Advertising at the Delhi College of Arts and Commerce. He has been a delegate in fifteen MUNs and has been on the Executive Board nine times.

HSC Chair Aayush Mohanty is currently a second-year student pursuing a B.A. in Political Science at the Delhi College of Arts and Commerce. He has participated in twenty-one MUNs.

Lok Sabha Chair Trishla is pursuing a B.Tech. degree at the Indira Gandhi Institute of Technology, New Delhi. She has participated in fourteen MUNs.

Though Lok Sabha Rapporteur Tanya Rohatgi describes herself as a „sarcastic, cuddly teddy bear‟, we sug-gest you aren‟t sexist, racist, homophobic, or otherwise judgmental around her, unless you‟re looking to incur her wrath. And do not, under any circumstances, act cheerful around her in the morning. Don‟t say we didn‟t warn you.

Lok Sabha Director Prannay Srivastava can always be appeased with food, should you ever get on his bad side - which you probably will if the size of your heels exceeds that of your brain. He believes that delegates should not fear anything more than the executive board during the course of an MUN, so be sure to cower in fear around him.

PAGE 3 ISSUE I

UNEP Chair Varun Jain is in the first year of a B.Sc. in Business and Management at the Indian School of Busi-ness and Finance in New Delhi. He has participated in thirteen MUNs.

Though UNEP Director Urvashi Nanda is known as „minion‟ through the school, we know this role will be reversed in committee when delegates grovel at her feet. She is excellent at everything she does, and we know this MUN will be no exception.

UNEP Rapporteur Tanushree Mediratta lives by the motto, “If you don‟t have anything intelligent to say, don‟t say anything at all”. This alpha nerd is one tough cookie, so delegates—you better watch out.

HRC Rapporteur Sachin Sastri needs no introduction as he‟s the resident IB genius, known for his „terrible‟ SAT scores. His favourite part of an MUN is the anarchy that results during crisis when he can sit back and watch delegates make the most bizarre alliances.

This year, the International Press will have its eyes and ears every-where during Shri MUN 2014. Our undercover correspondent is pos-ing as a delegate in the General Assembly, and will be providing us with classified information of all the secret goings-on which the press is not usually privy to. In this issue we bring a special message from this reporter, who will continue to update us through this column. The United Nations General Assembly is the largest commit-tee, one of the most influential committees, the toughest one to get recognition in, but definitely the most fun. Hopefully there will be more serious debate than Points of

Personal Privilege, or in other words, „I want to go to the toi-let because this is so boring!’. Hopefully there will be serious chits passed around and fewer love-chits or flirt-chits or I-don’t-like-what-they-are-saying chits. Hopefully this, hopefully that, the list is long but if it wasn‟t, then this wouldn‟t be a Model United Nations conference but an actual United Nations conference; and I doubt our delegates of Syria would like to defend Bashar al-Assad in the real UN! So ignore the „hopefully‟ messages and just have fun because an MUN is just that: a Mockery of the United Nations (with a touch of learning here and there).

PAGE 4 THE MUN GAZETTE