How to… Realise your full potential! · 2013. 10. 10. · performance, your career, relationships...

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How to… Realise your full potential! Bevis Moynan BSc, Trainer of NLP, MHYP, MTLT

Transcript of How to… Realise your full potential! · 2013. 10. 10. · performance, your career, relationships...

Page 1: How to… Realise your full potential! · 2013. 10. 10. · performance, your career, relationships or your sports performance, this guide will introduce you to processes and techniques

How to…

Realise your full potential!

Bevis Moynan BSc, Trainer of NLP, MHYP, MTLT

IntroductionNo matter who we are or what we do, we can all develop attitudes and behaviours that are not particularly helpful!

Unfortunately, the majority of people never get the opportunity to become aware of these limiting patterns of thought, behaviour and emotion.

Often people can carry on in the same cycle, becoming frustrated at the results being achieved.

By ordering this guide you have broken this cycle and taken your first and most important step towards self-improvement.

My name is Bevis Moynan and I work as a coach and trainer to help people resolve a wide range of issues. Whether you’re looking to improve your business’s performance, your career, relationships or your sports performance, this guide will introduce you to processes and techniques that could transform your life.

Inside we’ll cover everything from the four stages of business coaching to the benefits of NLP practitioner training, as well as looking in detail at some of my favourite coaching techniques. By the time you finish, you’ll not only have a much better understanding of why you’re experiencing the challenges you are, you’ll also understand exactly what you need to do to overcome them once and for all..

Bevis MoynanDirector, Magenta Coaching Solutions

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How to…

Realise your full potential!

Bevis Moynan BSc, Trainer of NLP, MHYP, MTLT

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Copyright©2013 Bevis Moynan

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise without the prior permission of the author(s).

Edited by Will Smith

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To join visit: www.nabo.biz

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IntroductionNo matter who we are or what we do, we can all develop attitudes and behaviours

that are not particularly helpful!

Unfortunately, the majority of people never get the opportunity to become aware

of these limiting patterns of thought, behaviour and emotion.

Often people can carry on in the same cycle, becoming frustrated at the results

being achieved.

By ordering this guide you have broken this cycle and taken your first and most

important step towards self-improvement.

My name is Bevis Moynan and I work as a coach and trainer to help people

resolve a wide range of issues. Whether you’re seeking to improve your business’s

performance, your career, relationships or your sports performance, this guide will

introduce you to processes and techniques that could transform your life.

Inside we’ll cover everything from the four stages of business coaching to the

benefits of NLP practitioner training, as well as looking in detail at some of my

favourite coaching techniques. By the time you finish, you’ll not only have a much

better understanding of why you’re experiencing the challenges you are, you’ll

also understand exactly what you need to do to overcome them once and for all.

Bevis MoynanDirector, Magenta Coaching Solutions

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The four stages of effective coachingAs anyone who has ever worked in a leadership position will tell you, it can be tough at the top. However, having the advice and guidance of a coach who is both a Neuro Linguistic Programming Trainer and Motivational Map Practitioner can lighten the load significantly.

An experienced coach can prove an invaluable investment. As well as helping you to clarify your goals and motivations, they will identify what is currently holding you back, as well as teaching you how to overcome these obstacles and make positive changes that will benefit you for years to come.

Although every coach has their own system of bringing about the results the client is after, our method involves a four stage process...

Stage one – clarification

This stage involves helping the client secure clarity with regard to what they want and where they are currently heading. This normally involves an hour’s initial consultation followed by tasks to aid clarification.

Stage two – identification

This stage (which usually involves a further two hours) consists of helping the individual to understand the things that are currently preventing them from achieving their goals – these could be practical or logistical reasons or more cerebral, like limiting beliefs about your own ability, for example.

One of the most common reasons people struggle to achieve their goals is that they are held back by negative emotions associated with past failures or events.

Whatever it is that is holding you and your business back, once you identify exactly what it is you will be in a far stronger position to start moving towards your ultimate goals.

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I can say categorically that every client we have ever worked with has been surprised by what they find is holding them back. Almost immediately they feel relieved that they now have the opportunity to do something about it and can see a way forward.

Stage three – intervention

Once we have identified what is currently going on, the next stage is to help you to develop the attitude you need to ensure any positive changes you do make will be lasting ones. This usually involves some form of coaching intervention (we’ll go into more depth on the specific techniques later).

Stage four - implementation

This stage is where all your hard work starts paying off and involves you putting your new plans into practice. The idea is to get you to take the first positive step towards your final goal, whatever it is that you need to do to take you to the next level.

Far too many coaches jump straight in at the implementation stage without first taking the time to identify what has been holding the individual back. As a result, even if the client does manage to take positive steps forward, these will almost always be followed by two steps backwards. Unless there is alignment between the conscious and the unconscious mind, there is always going to be conflict; it’s like an elastic band that is pulling them back from being successful.

Whilst helping individuals to clarify their goals, identify problems and change their way of thinking is extremely beneficial in terms of paving the way for future improvement, it is not always the end of the process…

Some people prefer advice and support when it comes to taking those all-important steps. Indeed, it is all too easy to push personal development, and things that are going to grow you and your business/career, to the bottom of your to do list. However, by continuing your relationship with your coach as you begin to

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implement changes, you’ll not only benefit from on-going support and advice, you’ll also greatly reduce the chances of setbacks inhibiting progress. What’s more, once you have a meeting with your coach booked, you’ll be much more likely to take the positive steps necessary to achieve your goals, as you will have someone holding you accountable if you don’t!

Let’s look at an example of how this whole process works by considering a case study…

I recently worked with a client who runs an extremely successful recruitment company. The problem he was experiencing was simple (and extremely common): he hated public speaking. If he had to speak to more than five people at a time, he would find it an extremely uncomfortable experience. Unsurprisingly, given his position at the head of the company, this was no small issue, and he was very keen to solve it.

During stage two of my four step process, we discovered that this was closely linked to his early experiences, when he used to get performance anxiety associated with playing cricket. The unconscious mind can’t tell the difference between performance anxiety associated with going out to bat and public speaking, and over time the negative emotions that accompany performance anxiety become intertwined with memories in what is known as a gestalt.

In order to combat the problem, I used a technique called timeline therapy, which allowed us to help him let go of the negative emotions associated with his past experiences. In business, being able to view the past free from negative emotion is an extremely useful skill, as it puts you in a far stronger position moving forward. Rather than dwelling on past mistakes and reliving poor decisions, you will be able to learn from them and deal with the situation at hand free from unhelpful emotions such as fear!

When it came to implementation, it was simple – he was able to talk to large groups of people. He now speaks comfortably in front of an audience and has recently completed a best man’s speech, which he had previously felt unable to go through with…

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What is Neuro Linguistic Programming?As we’ve already established, NLP techniques can be extremely effective at helping individuals to change the way they approach different situations and enabling them to bring about lasting change in their lives. But what exactly is NLP?

In order to answer this question fully, it is first necessary to split NLP up into its three constituent parts: neuro, linguistic and programming. The first part – neuro – involves understanding how the mind works. The second part – linguistic – relates to language, both verbal and nonverbal. This involves examining everything from tone of voice to body language and how much these influence our overall communication skills. Programming relates to a series of tools and techniques, all of which are geared towards helping people to focus on what they really want out of life. Too often people focus on what they don’t want and find that they are still unhappy or unfulfilled even if they have achieved the goals they have set for themselves. With the help of NLP techniques, however, people can identify what really motivates them quickly and easily. In turn, they can then adapt their goals and behaviours to ensure not only that their goals become a reality, but also that they enjoy the experience of reaching them.

“What results can NLP practitioner training deliver for me?”NLP delivers results for all three of the areas we have just discussed (“N”, “L” and “P”). Firstly, once you have a greater understanding of how the mind works and what are known as the presuppositions of NLP – beliefs that excellent communicators hold surrounding communication and their behaviour – you can change the way you think to assist you in your ability to positively influence others.

Secondly, once you have a better understanding of what constitutes good communication you’ll become less judgemental and have a greater understanding of where people’s behaviour is coming from. You’ll find that you are much more able to adapt your communication style to suit the needs of different people in order to influence them more effectively and deliver a better result. In turn, you’ll

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find that it is far easier to build rapport with people – something that will benefit you just as much in your private life as it will at work!

Thirdly, you’ll be able to overcome the fear or anxiety that often holds people back from fulfilling their full potential. One of the biggest positives that comes from an NLP course is the huge increase in confidence it gives you. Instead of being plagued by doubts and insecurities, you will be able to look to the future with anticipation.

Confidence

Too many people view confidence as an attribute that you either have or you don’t. However, confidence is something you can create. Indeed, over the past few years we have helped hundreds, if not thousands of people, to improve their confidence level through coaching and NLP training.

Let’s look at how NLP can build confidence…

One of the most effective ways to increase confidence involves a series of techniques in which we use things called ‘sub-modalities’. The concept is simple; the way our minds work is linked to our physiology (i.e. our body language at the time), our state (how we are feeling) and our internal representation (this is the picture we are holding in our mind at the time).

At any given time we are holding an unconscious image in our mind. Let’s say that I was dealing with someone with arachnophobia, for example. Were I to ask them to picture a spider, their picture would probably be close up and distorted. On the other hand, were I to ask anyone else to do the same thing, they would probably picture something small and harmless. What NLP allows us to do is to change the first image and the meaning that image holds.

For example, we recently worked with a client who wasn’t particularly confident when it came to a certain aspect of his job. After establishing something he was very confident at (in this case it was driving), we were then able to change the unconscious image for the area of work he was anxious about to be more like the one he had developed for driving. After just ten minutes he noted that he felt more confident and able to go out and complete the task we had assigned so that he could move forwards!

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Clarity and congruency

Every delegate who attends an NLP practitioner course completes a goal. However, it must relate to all areas of life. Thousands of people look to coaching/training to improve their results or performance, but there’s little point in producing fabulous results, if they are isolated to one area of life and the end result isn’t wholly beneficial for the client.

The key word here is congruency, and this is exactly what NLP can deliver. By discovering what really motivates you, you will be introduced to a variety of targeted techniques to help you overcome whatever is holding you back from achieving your new goal.

In the next section we’ll cover some of these techniques in a bit more detail…

NLP techniques (You learn these and more during a NLP practitioner course)

Parts integration

The great thing about going on an NLP practitioner course is that you will not only learn how to improve your communication skills, how to build rapport with people, how to amend your language to the needs of the people in front of you and how to use sub-modalities to gain confidence in different areas of life, but you’ll also learn how to use parts integration where you can use these newfound skills to help others as well as yourself.

The main focus of parts integration is to resolve an individual’s internal conflict. How often have you experienced “part of me wants to do X, but another part of me wants to do Y” – this is precisely the conflict that parts integration eliminates, whilst simultaneously improving confidence and energy levels. Having internal conflict can be tiring – I should know I used to have lots!

At the end of the process the person no longer has to deal with indecision and is left feeling congruent. Even though they may not know what path they are going to

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take straightaway, when they do come to make a decision they will feel confident in the choice they have made and won’t be plagued with the doubt and guilt they are currently experiencing.

It works by discovering the root motivations which are driving you towards the different options. It uncovers that, at the core, the intention of both motivations is not only positive, but ultimately the same. To pick a particularly common dilemma, for example, a client may wish to retire on the one hand as they want freedom, but on the other hand wish to keep working to enable them to stay in control.

What you learn to help clients do is chunk up the parts until they realise at an unconscious level that both drives stem from the same primary, positive motivation. At that point the conflict stops and the individual can move on with their lives feeling at peace and comfortable with whatever decision they have made.

Anchoring

Anchoring is a lovely technique that allows you to take control over your state of mind.

A huge percentage of us believe that how we feel is linked to something outside ourselves – how we wake up in the morning, what the weather is like and so on. However, we are of course able to control the way we feel, and anchoring is one of the most effective tools in allowing us to do this.

The way anchoring works is by creating a trigger (this can be auditory, visual or kinaesthetic) which automatically brings about a desired psychological response, in much the same way that hearing a song on the radio can put you straight back into the frame of mind you were in last time you heard it. Were you aiming to increase your confidence in a certain context, the NLP practitioner course will help you by teaching you how to link a kinaesthetic anchor to a positive, calm and confident state. By doing so, the next time you felt uncomfortable or anxious, all you would need to do would be to fire your anchor and you would instantly feel relaxed and confident. Many people are staggered at how easy this is to apply to both yourself and others once you know what you are doing!

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The anchoring technique is great for interviews, presentations and sports performance. Indeed, many top golfers use this technique to allow them to cope with the pressure of the major tournaments and stop them overthinking. It really can benefit you in every aspect of your life!

The ability to positively influence others

A big part of NLP revolves around improving the way we interact with one another.

Think about it; what percentage of your success is down to your ability to positively influence others? 50%? 90%? Now ask yourself, when was the last time that you worked on improving your ability to influence others? Are you even aware how you would go about doing this?

For every person I meet there is a discrepancy, and the NLP practitioner course helps you improve the precise skills which link directly to your success in life!

So effective is it at doing this, in fact, that I have had several clients who have come on my NLP course for business performance improvement who have come up to me months later and expressed delight at the fact they have not only achieved their desired business outcome, but that they have also experienced significantly improved relations with their teenage daughter or son!

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Motivational mapping (as endorsed by the United Nations)

Motivational mapping is an extremely effective self-perception tool (in fact, I am working with the United Nations using maps). In particular, it is great for managers/leaders who are seeking to better understand the individuals working for them in order to improve their leadership and management skills.

Many people assume that money is the most important motivator, yet in actual fact it is only one of nine. The motivators (in no particular order) are as follows...

• Competition and achievement

• Recognition

• Security

• Friendship and fulfilling relationships

• Control and influence

• Expertise, learning and mastery

• Doing something meaningful and worthwhile

• Creative innovation

• Freedom and independence

Once you are aware which of these factors you value and in what order, you are in a much better position to make important career decisions, as you can accurately predict which path is most likely to bring you satisfaction. Certainly, this process really helped me when I was unsure whether or not to move into coaching. Having completed the test and discovered that my main motivators were freedom and independence, I was able to leave my employment in the knowledge that I was making the right choice for me. The tool can also predict future changes in motivation (in conjunction with the guidance of your qualified map practitioner), so that you can plot future career changes at the right time.

Leadership and Management

Motivational maps are great for managers and leaders who want to better understand their team(s). A motivational map focuses on what really drives a

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person. The benefits of this from an employer’s standpoint are simple: it effectively tells you exactly how you need to approach an individual in order to inspire them in their work. Remember: everyone’s different, and what is great for motivating one employee may do nothing at all to motivate another! Whereas learning more about your employees’ personalities may be interesting, it won’t prove as helpful from a business perspective. Everyone has a reason for getting out of bed in the morning and being able to pinpoint this motivation will not only enable you to improve an employee’s productivity, but also their job satisfaction – a key consideration if you want to hold on to key staff members.

What’s more, once you have the results of this test, you will then be able to predict their future motivation fairly accurately too. For example, if creative innovation was one of their main motivators, they are likely to want to carry on doing increasingly creative projects in the future – in other words this motivator is only going to intensify. On the other hand, motivators like security and recognition generally become less important to individuals over a period of time.

Motivational maps can be incredibly useful when it comes to aiding recruitment and internal promotions. For example, you may be looking to promote a team member to a managerial position because they are so good at their job. However, whilst this would be fine for anyone motivated by control and influence, if the individual concerned is motivated by specialisation, this could be a poor appointment for everyone involved.

Similarly, this technique can also be instrumental in enabling leaders and managers to get to the bottom of workplace conflicts. Whilst personalities are obviously a factor in workplace conflicts, many stem from the fact that the people involved have different motivations. For example, if you had two employees working together, one of whom was motivated by creative innovation and the other by security, it is almost certain you would get friction, as the first will want to make changes and the second will want to keep things more stable.

In terms of the difference motivational mapping can make to an organisation, the results speak for themselves. I recently worked with a customer services company using maps, and staff satisfaction went up from 77% to 97% within just 12 months! In fact, so impressed have I been with the impact of these maps that I have trained

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as a business practitioner in motivational mapping to enable me to train other coaches and business people how to use this remarkably versatile tool.

Sports coachingEveryone now knows the importance of psychology when it comes to improving your performance, and as a result far more amateur sportsmen and women are following the professionals and having specialist coaching to assist them with their mental approach.

In particular, golfers do all sorts of things in order to feel comfortable over the ball. When Paul McGinley was asked how top level golfers kept their cool under such enormous pressure during the Ryder Cup a few years ago, his answer was simple: they follow their process. Although most people will assume this involves following their pre-shot routine, what many people don’t realise is that a pre-shot routine involves not only what you do with your body, but also a psychological process.

Though people’s initial response is often to assume that the problem with their play is down to the fact that they aren’t practising enough or that they aren’t good enough technically, you only have to look at the professionals to see how large a part psychology can play. Think of Rory McIlroy’s collapse at the Masters in 2011 and his recovery after employing inner game strategies at the US Open, or England’s woeful penalty record in recent decades. Sportspeople at the top level clearly have enough technical skill to avoid these situations; it is their mind-set that makes the difference between the winners and losers…

What Magenta’s sports coaching does is to help identify your problem areas and what needs to be done to resolve them for you. This may involve teaching state control techniques, anchoring or deeper processes in order to ensure self-sabotage does not occur at crucial moments.

My confidence in the effectiveness of NLP training and coaching stems not only from the positive feedback of clients and my record working with top golf coaches Paul Ashwell (UK top 25 coach) and Jamie Donaldson (Europe’s No.1 green

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reading specialist), but also the impact it has had on my own enjoyment of the game, as I find myself now playing off the lowest handicap I have ever achieved.

ConclusionI hope you have found this guide both interesting and informative and that you’re more confident in your ability to take control of your performance now and the achievement of your goals in the future.

No matter how abstract your goals, an expert coach will be able to help you discover the real reason progress is slower than you would like and teach you ways to overcome them. The best coaches will also work with you beyond this stage too in order to ensure that you don’t slip up when it comes to taking the steps to be the success you want to be.

About me (How I got started)After working my way up to the role of business development manager in my previous company, I found myself getting increasingly frustrated by my team’s inability to deal with conflict or stay calm under pressure. In an attempt to help them develop the skills they needed to succeed, I began looking at coaching courses and discovered NLP.

Impressed with what I read, and the fact that one of my friends had recently quit his job and started his own training company just a week after going on an NLP practitioner course, I decided to see if it was able to provide me with the answers I was looking for.

It is possibly the best decision I have ever made!

Having been forced to identify my own personal goals on the very first day, I completed nearly all of them just a year later, much to my amazement!

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Following the remarkable success of the NLP practitioner course, I then decided to complete the master practitioner course. Although I was still unsure as to what the outcome would be, the course completely changed my life. In particular, it helped to explain a lot about my past, particularly with regard to my sporting career. I was soon able to identify the reasons behind my self sabotage that had led to me not turning up for county cricket trials in my early 20s, despite having represented my country at amateur level in my late teens.

After finishing the course in February 2010 I was a completely different person. Having gone into the course with absolutely no desire to coach, I left feeling that it was my duty to coach other people and help them experience the kind of benefits that I had experienced in my own life.

It is for this reason that I set up Magenta Coaching Solutions in early 2010. Since then we have helped hundreds, if not thousands of people, to bring about positive, lasting change through NLP practitioner and Master Practitioner Courses as well as a wide range of coaching techniques, from motivational mapping and timeline therapy to breakthrough sessions and performance coaching.

Find out more…

For more information on any of the topics we have covered in this guide, and to learn more about how I can help you simply give us a call at the office on 01487 849925 to book or visit our website for further information.

www.magentacs.co.uk

www.magentacs.co.uk/nlp-training/

www.magentacs.co.uk/coaching-solutions/business-coaching/

Further, if you want advice regarding a specific topic or are unsure whether my solutions will be able to help you, simply drop me an email at [email protected] or give me a call.

We will always endeavour to get back to you within 48 hours of your call if not immediately…

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How to…

Realise your full potential!

Bevis Moynan BSc, Trainer of NLP, MHYP, MTLT

IntroductionNo matter who we are or what we do, we can all develop attitudes and behaviours that are not particularly helpful!

Unfortunately, the majority of people never get the opportunity to become aware of these limiting patterns of thought, behaviour and emotion.

Often people can carry on in the same cycle, becoming frustrated at the results being achieved.

By ordering this guide you have broken this cycle and taken your first and most important step towards self-improvement.

My name is Bevis Moynan and I work as a coach and trainer to help people resolve a wide range of issues. Whether you’re looking to improve your business’s performance, your career, relationships or your sports performance, this guide will introduce you to processes and techniques that could transform your life.

Inside we’ll cover everything from the four stages of business coaching to the benefits of NLP practitioner training, as well as looking in detail at some of my favourite coaching techniques. By the time you finish, you’ll not only have a much better understanding of why you’re experiencing the challenges you are, you’ll also understand exactly what you need to do to overcome them once and for all..

Bevis MoynanDirector, Magenta Coaching Solutions