HOW FACULTY CAN MANAGE DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS WITH STUDENTS

Brian Van Brunt, Ed.D.

Senior Vice President of Professional Program Development

The NCHERM Group, LLC

Brian@ncherm.org

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• Vignettes from seasoned faculty that provide thoughtful reflections and advice from everyday experience

• Research-based suggestions and intervention techniques to help faculty better assess, intervene, and manage difficult behavior

• Coverage of special populations, including nontraditional, veteran, and millennial students

• Discussion of the latest laws and regulations that should affect and inform faculty’s decisions

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Dealing with Danger

Mental Health

Rude and Entitled

Introduction

Sample Conversations

• “I don’t even want to take this class…”• “You aren’t clear about what material we are supposed

to study.”• “My other professor lets me use my phone in class.”• “I won’t be here next week for the final because my

family is going on vacation to Bermuda. I need to reschedule.”

• “I had a friend who killed himself last week. I haven’t been able to focus on class.”

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Introduction

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• Vignettes from seasoned faculty that provide thoughtful reflections and advice from everyday experience

• Research-based suggestions and intervention techniques to help faculty better assess, intervene, and manage difficult behavior

• Coverage of special populations, including nontraditional, veteran, and millennial students

• Discussion of the latest laws and regulations that should affect and inform faculty’s decisions

Introduction

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Annoying

DisruptiveDangerous

Introduction

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Introduction

Dangerous

• Acts of aggression• Threats towards self or others• Depression or hopelessness• Endorsing violence or weapons• Anger/Agitation/Inability to cope• Seems out of touch with reality

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Introduction

Disruptive

• Yelling or being excessively loud• Interrupting, not waiting for response• Hygiene concerns• Under the influence of substances• Refusing to leave or cooperate• Destructive of property• Not responding to your instructions

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Introduction

Annoying

• Staring• Not picking up on social cues• Occupying personal space• Wanting to speak to your chair/dean• Disrespectful or rude behavior• Threatening to sue you• Monopolizing your time

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How do you feel when students exhibit these behaviors?

1. Frustrated2. Scared3. Annoyed4. Uncomfortable5. Not bothered at all

Introduction

• Humanistic Counseling “Core Concepts”• Genuineness and Congruence• Unconditional Positive Regard• Empathy and Perceptions of Empathy

Dr. Brian Van Brunt, LPCC, CFC Western Kentucky University

Overview of Rogers/Person-Centered Counseling

Introduction

Dr. Brian Van Brunt, LPCC, CFC Western Kentucky University

“Under the most adverse circumstances, they were striving to become. Life would not give up, even if it could not flourish...The clue to understanding their behavior is that they are striving, in the only ways that they perceive as available to them, to move toward growth, toward becoming. To healthy persons, the results may seem bizarre and futile, but they are life’s desperate attempt to become itself. This potent constructive tendency is an underlying basis of the person-centered approach.”

Dr. Brian Van Brunt, LPCC, CFC Western Kentucky University

Introduction

Dr. Brian Van Brunt, LPCC, CFC Western Kentucky University

“I remember in my boyhood, the bin in which we stored our winter’s supply of potatoes was in the basement, several feet below a small window.

The conditions were unfavorable, yet the potatoes would begin to sprout—pale white sprouts, so unlike the healthy green shoots they sent up when planted in the soil in the spring.

But these sad, spindly sprouts would grow 2 or 3 feet in length as they reach towards the distant light of the window.

Dr. Brian Van Brunt, LPCC, CFC Western Kentucky University

Introduction

• Simon Bailey, a motivational speaker, suggests that every person in your classroom is a “diamond-in-the rough.”

• As such, diamonds are polished to their brilliance at different times, various temperatures and through a multitude of experiences.

• This approach lines up with Roger’s humanistic theory. Students want to achieve, they just need help removing the obstacles in their path.

Releasing Your Brilliance

(Simon Bailey)

Introduction

Bailey, S. (2007). Release your Brilliance. Collins Business.

Simon Bailey: Releasing your Brilliance

• Simon suggests that our internal thoughts and beliefs about the world impact our ability to take action---both on a small and grand scale.

• A professor who adjusts the way she sees underperforming students. If we believe in them and create opportunities for them to be successful---they will become successful in your class. This success then gives you the encouragement to impact other students and classes, your department and college.

Introduction

A Student’s Success, Fuels further Success

CreateChances

Alter Beliefs

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• Is there imminent danger?• Is there a possible threat?• Can I resolve this situation? • If not, what can I do to help manage it until I can

get support?• What should I report and to whom?Strive to resolve the situation at the lowest level

possible.

Dealing with Danger

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Recognize when to report:• Document in your own notes• Report to Chair/Dean• Report to Campus BIT

Recognize when to refer:• To campus police• To campus resource• To Student Conduct/Judicial Affairs• To Behavioral Intervention Team

Dealing with Danger

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An older student emails her adjunct faculty member, challenging two exam questions & her grade. The faculty member responds via email. Then the student brings it up during class, becoming argumentative & enraged, resulting in her yelling & shoving a desk 6 feet across the room.

Dealing with Danger

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Be Aware of Your Feelings

1. Entitled attitude by student2. Dangerous escalation in class3. Student behavior stealing teaching time other

students deserve4. Student lacks responsibility for exam5. Student’s lack of respect

Dealing with Danger

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Core Concepts

• Recognize both cognitive & physical signs• Understand escalation• Impact both professor & student• “Am I making this worse or better?”• Put aside attendance, grades• Don’t be right & ‘punched in the head’

Dealing with Danger

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Meta-Communication

• Understand the content (what is being said) & process (how it is being said)Spoken: “This test question isn’t fair! It wasn’t on the

study guide & the answers are vague. You need to change my grade!!”

Unspoken: “I’m scared & lost in your class. I study hard but still fall behind.”

Dealing with Danger

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How to Help?

• Respond to the unspoken message to match the question being asked.

• Too often, we match defenses & anger. Focus on worry, concern & frustration underneath.

• As Covey says, “Seek first to understand and then be understood.”

Dealing with Danger

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How to Help?

• Calm mindset and develop rapport• Build a bridge between you and them• Realize the way you see things isn’t always the way

they see things

Dealing with Danger

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How to Help?

• See crisis response as a two-step model(1) Address dangerous behavior first

Dealing with Danger

Calmly

Discuss

Redirect

Behavior

Separate

Student

Dismiss

Class(2) Follow with proper backup/support• You schedule the time and place• Include dean, police, counseling…

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A student with Asperger’s disorder asks multiple, off-topic questions during class, engages in odd, repetitive behaviors and is teased by other students. The professor is concerned about the amount of time spent handling the student’s behavior as well as the impact of the teasing & bullying.

Mental Health

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Be Aware of Your Feelings

1. Behavior gets in way of other students’ learning2. Behavior interrupts your flow & teaching3. Other students teasing the student4. School admitting more students not ready for college5. You handle more troubled students without training

or pay

Mental Health

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Proper Mindset

• Identify internal emotions• Avoid generalizations• Focus on problem at hand• Stay calm, cool and collected• Consider how you might be perceived• Apply cycle breathing*

Mental Health

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Setting the Stage

• Talk to the student alone (if safe)• Talk should be free of time pressure• Seek to understand, not to judge• Listen to his/her point of view• Discuss with neutral tone; no sarcasm• Build connection; working together• Use Motivational Interviewing skills*

Mental Health

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Breathe in slowly to the count of 1…2…3…4…

Hold your breath to the count of 1…2…

Breathe out slowly to the count of 1…2…3…4…

Hold your breath to the count of 1…2…www.aggressionmanagement.com

*

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Motivational Interviewing Involves:

• Expressing Empathy• Developing Discrepancy• Avoiding Argumentation• Rolling with Resistance• Supporting Self-Efficacy

Miller, W. R. & Rollnick, S. (1991). Motivational Interviewing: Preparing People to Change Addictive Behavior. New York: Guilford Publications.

Mental Health

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In this case: Annoying=Mental Health Disorder

• Don’t assume or diagnose• Know your ADA referral staff• How do you access counseling?• Seek consultation with colleagues • Consider a team meeting• Follow up with the student

Mental Health

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Don’t Do This:

• Begin intervention annoyed & frustrated• Make assumptions about their motivation• Talk much; avoid listening• Increase hierarchy between student/prof• Use sarcasm

Mental Health

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Do This:

• Have a calm, cool & collected mindset• Share concerns without judgment & assumptions;

neutral, ‘just the facts’• Listen to student, show respect• Align with the student toward success• Avoid sarcasm• Stay solution focused (What next?)

Mental Health

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Look for Signs of Suicide

Direct Verbal Clues“I’ve decided to kill myself.”“I wish I were dead.”“I’m going to commit suicide.”

Indirect Verbal Clues“I’m tired of life, I just can’t go on.”“I won’t be around much longer.”“Pretty soon you won’t have to worry about me.”

Mental Health

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Situational / Environmental Clues

• Any previous suicide attempt• Acquiring a gun or stockpiling pills• Putting personal affairs in order• Giving away prized possessions• Substance abuse/relapse after a period of recovery

Mental Health

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A student behaves in an entitled manner. He texts in class, shows up late, gets up frequently to use the bathroom (or take a smoke break) & surfs the Internet during class. The student was asked to reduce these behaviors. He does not comply. The student smells of alcohol & talks about parties the night before.

Rude & Entitled

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Be Aware of Your Feelings

1. Frustrated with admissions standards 2. Angry/Anxious about lost lecture time3. Not sure how to handle problems4. Don’t like having to police students5. Lack of compliance6. Misuse of technology in class

Rude & Entitled

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Eight-Step Outline for Difficult Conversations*

1. Describe the behavior & its impacts2. Listen to the their perspective & response3. Discuss appropriate behavior 4. Discuss resources to promote success5. Reiterate or set parameters for future behaviors

* Thanks to Laura Bennett at Harper College

Rude & Entitled

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Eight-Step Outline for Difficult Conversations*

6. Share consequences for non-compliance7. Summarize the conversation8. Inform of any follow-up:

• Document the conversation & plan• Decide who you will inform, • Check in with the student, etc.

* Thanks to Laura Bennett at Harper College

Rude & Entitled

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Prochaska and DiClemente’sChange Theory

Rude & Entitled

Stage of Change Faculty Member’s Motivational Task

Pre-contemplation Raise doubt; increase their perception of risk and problems with current behavior

Contemplation Help student head towards change out of their current ambivalence; help them identify risk for not changing; strengthen self-efficacy for changing current behavior

Preparation for Action

Help the student identify and select the best initial course of action; reinforce movement in this direction

Action Help the student take steps towards change; provide encouragement and praise

Maintenance & Relapse

Teach student relapse prevention skills

• Help students overcome obstacles to obtain the support they need

• Explore resources via the campus website

• Call various departments and learn about the services that are offered

• Look for potential obstacles that may prevent students from accessing care

• Offer guidance in your syllabus; invite departments to give brief intros during class time

Tips

• Stress is all around us. Understanding the nature of the environmental stress non-traditional students face is key.

• Stress is cumulative. As it builds, students worry they won’t be able to catch up.

• Balance the fine line between helping the student progress without holding them to an abstract standard. Require hard work, but build flexibility into your approach that allows for an understanding of context.

Tips

• Develop relationships with students so that the first conversation isn’t a “bad one”

• Learn how to describe behaviors objectively and be consistent in your approach

• Keep good documentation

• Invest time in solutions, not in complaining

• Give yourself permission to feel uncomfortable, not to be evasive

Tips

Be Proactive (create environment, choose response before problems start)

Begin with the End in Mind (create cognitive mindset, what is the vision, what is the habit)

Put First Things First (application of mindset, habit in action, short-term goals)

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7 Habits of Highly Effective People (Stephen Covey)

Stephen Covey: 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

Understand then be Understood(diagnosis first, then prescribe)

Synergize (the whole is greater than the sum of its parts)

Sharpen the Saw: (maintain and renew)

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Think Win-Win(achievements depend on cooperation, working together)4

Questions?

Brian Van Brunt, Ed.D.

Senior Vice President of Professional Program Development

The NCHERM Group, LLC

Brian@ncherm.org