GUIDING CHILDREN’S BEHAVIORHPC 3OMay 2nd, 2013

Understanding Guidance Punishment is only a small part of

guiding children Guidance: using firmness and

understanding to help children learn to control their own behavior

Understanding Guidance As a result of effective guidance,

children achieve self-discipline ability to control their own behavior

Understanding GuidanceWhy is effective guidance important? Helps children learn to get along with

others Handle feelings in an acceptable way Promotes security and a positive feeling

about self Moral development Developing a conscience - - inner sense

of what is right

Consistency Clearly making rules an applying them in

the same way in all situations Children lose trust in a caregiver who

constantly changes rules or fails to enforce them

What should a parent do if more than one person cares for the child?

Guiding Behavior3 ways to guide children to behave:1. Encouraging appropriate behavior2. Setting and enforcing limits3. Dealing with inappropriate behavior in

effective ways

Encouraging Appropriate Behavior3 ways:1. Setting a good example2. Telling what is expected3. Praising appropriate behavior positive

reinforcement

Encouraging Appropriate Behavior Be specific Notice the behavior as soon as possible Recognize small steps Help the child take pride in his or her actions Tailor the encouragement to the needs of the child

Setting Limits Limits include physical restrictions or

rules of behavior Limits should keep children from hurting

themselves, other people or property Should be few and reasonable!

What Should Limits Be? Does the limit allow the child to learn,

explore and grow? Is the limit fair and appropriate for the

child’s age? Does the limit benefit the child, or is it

merely for the adult’s convenience?

Making Limits Clear Clearly state limits and restate

everytime the situation arises Limits must be clear have a “small

snack” is unclear for a 3-year old Calm, direct tone

Making Limits ClearSetting limits includes four steps:1. Show understanding of the child’s

desires2. Set the limit and explain it3. Acknowledge the child’s feelings4. Give alternatives

Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior

A caregiver should ask these questions when responding to a child’s misbehavior:

Is the expected behavior appropriate given the child’s development?

Does the child understand the behavior is wrong?

Was the behavior knowingly and deliberately?

Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior

Unintentional Misbehavior: Spilling milk or juice for example

shouldn’t be punished! If the child had no way of knowing it was

wrong Brittany picking flowers from the park

Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior

Using Punishment Effectively: Deliberate attempts Punishment is negative reinforcement

response aimed at discouraging a child from repeating a behavior

Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior

Using Punishment Effectively: 1st time child breaks rule a warning is

fine Rule broken another time punishment

given according to severity of misbehavior

Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior

Techniques for dealing with inappropriate behavior:

Natural consequences Loss of privileges: Take away a privilege.

Most effective for ages 5 and older Giving time-out: Short period of time in

which a child sits away from other people and the center of activity

Dealing with Inappropriate Behavior

Poor Disciplinary Measures: Bribing Making children promise to behave:

forced to lie about misbehavior rather than disappoint

Shouting or yelling Shaming or belittling Threatening to withhold love

Handling Conflict Anger – a natural emotion. Do not make

the child feel guilty about it Caregivers can help the child learn that

there are acceptable ways of handling that anger

Handling ConflictWays of handling anger: Using words Speaking calmly Counting to ten

Discuss the misbehavior and punishment after the child has calmed down. Explain how they misbehaved and what they should have done instead*