Week 8 21st August 2012

GUEST SPEAKER PROGRAM

Date Speaker Subject Speaker Host 28 August 12 Insp. Bruce Kuhn The Diversity of Policing

4 Sept. 12 Vijay Kapadia PHF Rotary Health in Fiji Vicky Nicoll

11 Sept. 12 Rob Borbidge

18 Sept.12 Nepalese Dinner Outside event – partners evening

25 Sept. 12 Bob Carroll Australian Events Group

Door Duty Roster

Date Attendance 1 Attendance 2 Greeter 28 August 12 Andrew Mills Noel Hodges Peter Sutton

4 Sept. 12 Andrew Mills Malcolm Daviess Ros Byrne

11 Sept. 12 Andrew Mills Bill Waller Graham Sivyer

18 Sept. 12 Andrew Mills Denis O’Brien Russ Hutchison

Please note: No.1 Doorkeeper will now hold the position for 4 weeks to simplify the handover proceedings – please check how this affects you.

Please note your inclusion in any of the Duty Rosters implies your duty to attend – if you cannot for any reason, the responsibility for finding your replacement lies with you.

CONGRATULATIONS DUE THIS WEEK

Birthdays Anniversaries Inductions

Marilyn Bee Kevin O’Brien

Noel Hodges Klaus Axmann 2009 Frank Adorjan 2002

Bill Waller 2002

Last Week’s Meeting

Attendance Apologies Meeting Income Charity Fund Raising

Rotarians Hon. Members (Lloyd Yelland,

Syd Garrett, Uwe Seifert, Peter

Green) Visiting Rotarians Partners/Family

Guest speaker(s) Club Guests

Visitors

Total

36 4

22 22 16

100

Neil Jones John Harding Peter Sutton Keith Hawton Alex Jorden

Rob Domican Nasser Kaviani Nayer Kaviani Bruce Kuhn

Hermann Rogers

Raffle $310 Fines $N/A

Copper Pot $N/A

Sizzle $508 Home Show $3,343

Y.T.D. $7,580

SAUSAGE SIZZLE ROSTER 8:00am – 11:00pm 11:0am – 2:00pm

31 Aug 12 Noel Hodges Inner Wheel + 2

Noel Hodges Inner Wheel + 2

7 Sept. 12 John Harding Nasho 1 & 2

Kevin O’Brien Nasho 3 & 4

14 Sept. 12 Brian Pearson Jan Munroe Bill Waller

John Curr Pat Curr

Helen Busch

21 Sept. 12 Hermann Rogers Bob Jordan Peter Sutton

John Bee Noel Hodges Ian Cowen

28 Sept. 12 Cec McPaul Peter Tomlinson

Arch

Vicky Nicoll Kevin Wilkins John Harding

Sausage Sizzle Rules – no open shoes & remove apron before visit to bathroom If non Rotarians are helping us, we provide them with a sizzle & drink free of charge

Top Priority – Please ensure visitors log in, and out, when working on any Rotary event, otherwise they are not covered by Rotary

Insurance Please remember it is your responsibility to arrange a replacement if you can’t make it

Well our 40th Anniversary celebration has now been and gone.

And what a celebration it was!! It was great to see so many old and new members, presidents and friends of Broadbeach Rotary. It was pleasing for us to be able to again welcome our ADG Darrell Brown as well as our new Mayor Tom Tate & his wife Ruth. They were joined by our new Division 10 councillor Paul Taylor. All indicated a genuine interest in the history and achievements of our great club and we hope that they will continue their connection with us. Members of the 40

th planning committee were all pleased to see their efforts come together on the

night and to observe everyone present fully enjoying the occasion. Thanks again to Richard Holland – his work as producer of the various PowerPoint shows was thoroughly enjoyed by us all as we observed moments of our activities that started way back in August 1972. Many thanks to all members of the committee – in particular Chris Thomsen as chairperson of the team, Malcolm Daviess, Neil Baldwin & everyone else that did the jobs assigned to them – whether it be home hosting, cruise boat provision, car chauffeuring, erecting flags, district props etc. etc. – it was truly a great team effort from our members. The end result made it all very worthwhile and we now have another major event to remember. I am looking forward to the collection of the many photographs taken so that we can build up an album for us all to look back on. Our guest speaker on Tuesday will be our newest member – Inspector Bruce Kuhn – now based at the Broadbeach Police station. Bruce has spent many years in a variety of locations across the state and he will be able to relate some great stories about the “Diversity of Policing” he has encountered during that time. President Jim

First there was the boat trip

And then the Party

The Broadbeach Joker

Earl and Bubba are quietly sitting in a boat fishing, chewing tobacco and drinking beer when suddenly Bubba says, "Think I'm gonna divorce the wife - she ain't spoke to me in over 2 months." Earl spits overboard, takes a long, slow sip of beer and says, "Better think it over.............women like that are hard to find."

...................... Q. How do you get men to do sit-ups? A. Put the remote control between his toes

........................... A doctor in Dublin wanted to get off work and go fishing, so he approached his assistant. 'Murphy, I am going fishing tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all me patients'. 'Yes, sir!' answers Murphy.

The doctor goes fishing and returns the following day and asks: ' So, Murphy, how was your day?' Murphy told him that he took care of three patients. 'The first one had a headache so he did, so I gave him Paracetamol.' 'Bravo Murphy lad, and the second one?' asks the doctor. 'The second one had indigestion and I gave him Gaviscon, so I did sir' says Murphy. 'Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?' asks the doctor. 'Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door flies open and a young gorgeous woman borsts in so she does. Like bolt outta the blue, she tears off her clothes, and lies down on the table, and shouts: 'HELP ME for the love of St Patrick! For five years I have not seen any man!'' 'Tunderin' lard Murphy, what did you do?' asks the doctor. 'I put drops in her eyes.'

.......................... Father Norton woke up Sunday morning and realizing it was an exceptionally beautiful and sunny early spring day, decided he just had to play golf. So... he told the Associate Pastor that he was feeling sick and persuaded him to say Mass for him that day. As soon as the Associate Pastor left the room, Father Norton headed out of town to a golf course about forty miles away. This way he knew he wouldn't accidentally meet anyone he knew from his parish. Setting up on the first tee, he was alone. After all, it was Sunday morning and everyone else was in church! At about this time, Saint Peter leaned over to the Lord while looking down from the heavens and exclaimed, "You're not going to let him get away with this, are you?" The Lord sighed, and said, "No, I guess not." Just then Father Norton hit the ball and it shot straight towards the pin, dropping just short of it, rolled up and fell into the hole. IT WAS A 420 YARD HOLE IN ONE! St. Peter was astonished. He looked at the Lord and asked, "Why did you let him do that?" The Lord smiled and replied, "Who's he going to tell?"

............................ An old couple were married for many years. Whenever there was a confrontation, yelling could be heard deep into the night. The old man would shout, "When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!" Neighbours feared him. The old man liked the fact that he was feared. To everyone's relief, he died of a heart attack when he was 98. His wife had a closed casket at the funeral. After the burial, her neighbours, concerned for her safety, asked: "Aren't you afraid that he may indeed be able to dig his way out of the grave and haunt you for the rest of your life?"

The wife said, "Let him dig. I had him buried upside down and I know he won't ask for directions...."

................................

Impossible for this poor kid,

who never hurt anyone, to enjoy a normal life. We can prevent his brothers and sisters from suffering the same fate.