Unemployment Stories, Vol. 26: 'I Want Hope'(http://gawker.com/5983361/unemployment-stories-vol-26-i-want-hope)

Since the Great Recession struck several years ago, nearly a quarter of Americans have been

laid off (http://economix.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/02/07/rings-of-unemployment/)

themselves, and another 50% of Americans have seen a friend or family member lose their job.

Each week, we bring you true stories of unemployment (http://gawker.com/hello-from-the-

underclass/), straight from the unemployed. This is what's happening out there.

The Congressional staffer

My Dad had a stable job. When I went off to college, he was on his 25th year

working for the same company as a computer technician. My mom wanted to

avoid the empty nest syndrome (I'm an only child), and went back to teaching.

My freshman year, I made the Chancellor's list, worked out every day and got to

know all of my professors. I was going to a small liberal arts school in the

mountains of North Carolina. Things were so perfect, I feared something bad was

going to happen. And it did. I was home for Christmas break and my Dad

announced (two weeks before Christmas) he had been laid off. I was only 18 years

old and my Dad had been working for the same place way longer than I had been

alive!

Consequently, I found three part-time jobs and signed up for 18 hours (full-load)

the next semester. I worked seven days a week and paid for most of my tuition.

My Dad was out of work for a year and would drink a bottle of wine a day and fell

into a deep depression. My Mom hated her teaching job but couldn't quit or we

would all lose our health insurance.

After my Dad got another job and Type 2 diabetes, I cut back to only one part-

time job. I worked as a barista at a new coffee shop. We didn't get much business

and after my paychecks starting bouncing I quit.

I did not have a plan for after college. I cried to my professor. He helped me find a

part-time job and told me to get my Master's. Subsequently, I became a graduate

student the next fall and worked as a News Radio Reporter for ClearChannel

communications. My news director sexually harassed me for a year. I didn't know

what to do since it was my first real job, so I just endured the unwanted advances.

Later, my news director quit. The woman that took his place told me that I had to

be a reporter and an anchor to meet the station's needs. Suddenly, my job

requirements doubled with no raise. Without any training, I tried making

recordings of news on the sound board. My boss said I sounded "too young" or

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"too southern" for the news. A month later, she said I don't have "what it takes

anymore" and today would be my last day. I was horrified. Until that moment, I

had never failed at anything.

That night, I drank an obscene amount of whiskey and screamed the F word off

my balcony like a psychotic woman. I decided not to collect unemployment and

focused on finishing up grad school.

I graduated on time with honors but still did not have a plan. I took a really effed

up job for a year with this promotional marketing company. Turned out, it went

bankrupt. In my spare time, I volunteered for a presidential campaign. After the

primary, I got offered a job as a finance director for a US Congressman running

for reelection. I worked 60+ hours a week for little money and raised close to one

million dollars.

After the election night victory, I got offered a full-time job with benefits as a

Congressional aide. For one year, I answered the phones until opportunity struck.

One of the caseworkers had a nervous breakdown and quit. She was making twice

as much money as me. Immediately, I asked my supervisor for the promotion.

The chief-of-staff finally agreed and I became a constituent services director for

Veteran Affairs. What I did not know was- I would be inheriting over 700 open

cases and have no assistant to help me. Every day, at least five new cases would

come into the office.

I primarily worked with disabled Veterans who were trying to get their benefits

from the VA. The VA had an enormous backlog and I tried to expedite their

claims. Unfortunately, that still took a long time and many Veterans lost their

homes or died before they could get the money they were entitled too. On top of

that, the Veterans would tell me the most gruesome stories which caused them to

get PTSD.

I never could get my caseload under control. The VA was slow because of their

backlog. It was a hopeless. For every step I took forward, I jumped 10 steps back.

I couldn't let it go after 5pm. I worried about the Veterans and their families

around the clock. At night, I would have dreams of blood and body parts. Then, I

became afraid to fall asleep. I found the only way to relieve the stress was to drink

alcohol. In just one year, I went from drinking two or three drinks at night to

drinking the second I woke up. I wanted to commit suicide and for several nights I

would try to drink the fatal amount of alcohol .4 that would put me to sleep

permanently.

Somehow, I kept waking up every morning. I drank throughout the entire day

and drank until I passed out at night. My hair began falling out. I quit eating and

no longer had a period. Bruises were all over my body because I was no longer

producing bone marrow. I couldn't stop drinking or I would get the shakes and

have terrible withdraw symptoms.

One fateful day, I woke up in pure agony. It felt like a thousand knives were

stabbing me in the stomach and in the back. I was rushed to the hospital and was

diagnosed with pancreatitis from alcohol consumption. My enzyme count was so

high that doctors were baffled that my pancreas had not ruptured. They all said I

was lucky to be alive. I spent a week in the hospital and detoxed. I went through

the DTs and thought demons were all over my room and trying to kill me.

The doctor found out my insurance would pay for rehab. I agreed to go while

under the influence of some serious hardcore narcotics. After getting discharged, I

went to a place in Virginia for 21 days over Christmas and New Years. Rehab was

miserable. One addict tried to jump off the roof and kill himself while I was there.

I saw people having seizures and throwing up blood. Everyone seemed to have

HEP C. I got made fun of because I was there for alcohol and not harder drugs. I

did not smoke so I spent most of my time alone, waiting to go home.

I returned to the mountains and went back to work. Nothing changed so I

continued drinking. The doctors told me that if I did not stop, I would be dead

within six months. I did not care. One day, my supervisor came into my office

and said I either had the option of quitting or being terminated. The reason was I

"delegated too much work to the volunteers." After nearly 5 years as a federal

employee, I was given a box to put my belongings in, asked to log out of the

computer immediately, and hand over my key to the office. I felt bitter and

hopeless.

Around this time, I had bought a handgun and would hold it to my head with my

finger on the trigger. I wanted so badly to shoot myself but I thought of my dog

and the blood. I couldn't go through with it so I decided to keep drinking and

hopefully die in six months like the doctor predicted.

That same week I was fired, I lost all control and became totally reckless. Over the

weekend, I had about 14 drinks in one day, and got pulled over for my first DWI. I

spent the night and all next morning in jail. Ironically, the jail was on the same

street as my old office. I couldn't believe that in one week I went from working for

a US Congressman to being locked up.

This time I applied for unemployment. I got it and started paying the costly

COBRA every month. COBRA allowed me to see a doctor and go to therapy. I was

diagnosed with clinical depression and generalized anxiety disorder.

Without alcohol for me to drink until I passed out, it was nearly impossible for me

to fall asleep. I became an insomniac. Once, I went over 72 hours without sleeping

and began having hallucinations and hearing things that weren't real. I couldn't

take it anymore so I drank and drank until I finally passed out. Once I woke up, I

had pancreatitis again. I was hospitalized for the second time and seen by a

psychiatrist. He quickly misdiagnosed me with a mental illness (bipolar disorder)

and recommended that I spend a week in the psych ward. I committed myself and

given large doses of lithium and other anti-pyschotic drugs. All of the medicine

made me feel like a zombie and I lost my personality completely.

After the psych ward, I stopped drinking so much and began smoking weed

everyday. I gained about 50 pounds and let myself go. I was still making 420

(ironic number) a week on unemployment and all the jobs that were open at that

time paid less than unemployment. I decided to not work until my benefits ran

out.

I got a two month extension so I spent a total of 14 months without a job. I still

have suicidal thoughts and battle depression often. I have lost most of my friends

and moved out of my condo and back in with my parents. My benefits have all

expired and I will be without health insurance in a week.

The last eighteen months have gone by fast. Anti-depressants and therapy really

helped my depression. All of my life savings have run out and I was draining my

parents for money. They were running low on cash and I panicked. I was worried

I was going to lose my home and have to sell all of my belongings. As fate would

have it, my grandfather died and made me a benefactor in his will. Now, I have

enough money to get me by for awhile.

My problem is I am terrified of finding another job. I have been traumatized by

the past. Unfortunately, I have such a huge lapse in unemployment, no one would

want to hire me. I can't tell any future employer about my stress level at the

Congressman's office or how it drove me to alcoholism. I can't fit into any of my

business clothes after gaining all this weight.

I am thankful to have money right now and not be homeless. I don't know how to

get over my fear of work. I keep thinking I will get fired again or get so stressed

out I will want to binge drink. I don't know how I am going to get past this. I am

glad I did not kill myself. I know that losing one or two jobs does not mean I failed

as a human being and no longer deserves to live. I want to be happy. I want hope.

And I never want to work in politics again!

The military man

I got back from a deployment in the Middle East in late 2008, and moved in with

my parents. I asked if I could stay there for, "a few weeks" until I found work, an

apartment, and maybe got back to school. I immediately started sending out

resumes for jobs that were in my field of interest and experience. I made it a goal

to send out three resumes a week. After the first few weeks, I was sending out two

or three a day, looking for anything that paid. I applied for retail, fast food, and

warehouse work. I got a few interviews, but my biggest challenge was trying to

explain how my military experience and skills would translate to their companies.

Finally, I got a part time job in a coffee shop. I couldn't afford to move out, but I

could start paying some of my bills. I continued to submit resumes wherever I

could. I became frustrated and disheartened by the rejection, and the stress of

living at home. My mother would berate me regularly, telling me that I had to go

to businesses in person. I tried to explain that I had tried that and was always

directed to online applications. I self medicated with alcohol, often drinking myself

to sleep. I was furious when the President and Congress spent trillions of dollars

bailing out the very businesses and individuals whose poor foresight and

mismanagement had put us in this situation to begin with. I deeply resent, to this

day, the misguided liberal polices and politicians that made the situation worse

than it should have been, and who chose to take money from the working poor

like me and give it those who had hurt so many.

After several months, the coffee shop company restructured the district, closed

some stores, and laid several people off. I wasn't included in that round of layoffs,

but about two weeks later I was called into a meeting with the store manager and

district manager, where I was told that they would no longer be able to

accomodate my reserve duty schedule, which required me to drill one weekend a

month. It was April 15. I mailed my tax return that same day. I called the ESGR,

an organization who supports and defends the rights of reservists and guard

members. They contacted the company, who reinstated me, but I was let go a

month later in the next round of layoffs.

I was unemployed for three months. The coffee company contested my

unemployment claim, so I wasn't even recieving benefits. I finally found a full-

time job as a customer service rep that allowed me to move out, and go back to

school and finish my degree. I have since moved on into a position as a case

manager in public housing The memories of that time are still incredibly strong,

and the depression, frustration, and sense of futility of that period make me

grateful for what I have now. I have friends who are still unemployed, and

desperate, and I try to help them however I can, because I can well relate.

Labor Day

My story starts back in 2009. I was in my junior year of a biology program. I had

an overall strong GPA and was applying to REUs (National Science Foundation

funded internships). I received nothing but rejections. I turned to the private

sector and hit another dead end. I didn't realize it yet, but I was going to hit a lot

more dead ends. I finished up the rest of the semester and it was summer

vacation. I had some money I had saved up from working at an on campus job

and I wanted to spend a little bit of time with my long distance girlfriend. I hit

unexpected resistance from my parents, including them threatening to cut off

financial support of college. I didn't believe them and called their bluff. I went to

visit her. As a direct result of this, I found myself 500 miles away from where I

previously called home and with an associates degree instead of the bachelors I

had been working towards.

I knew the economy was bad, but I needed to find work and I saw lab technician

and lab assistant jobs on sites like Monster and CareerBuilder. Thus began my first

period of long term unemployment. I applied for positions every single morning

after getting up, I was genuinely hopeful at first. I thought even with the

economic downturn I should be able to find something. I had some education and

it was in a STEM field, I had been hearing all my life about the value of a technical

education. It amounted to little more than nothing. Months went by, I had the

occasional interview, but no offer. As Thanksgiving approached I swallowed by

pride and applied for food stamps. The application must have been lost in the mail

and I had to apply again. It was 2010 before I was approved, but I was approved.

It's amazing how much even $200 a month can help, even if I was still ashamed I

needed the help. I was from a middle class family, I wasn't supposed to need this

kind of help. That summer I had my break, a short contract job with a food

company. It was a 45-50 minute drive, second shift, and only paid $11/hr, but I

didn't care. It was work. It turned out the company only wanted a technician

because they had been looking for some while for a supervisor and needed

somebody to help out while they searched. I actually kind of liked the job, simple

as it was. They found the supervisor they were looking for, trained her, and I was

let go.

I quickly found a similar job at a different food company. This one was an hour

and a half away, and required us to move, but it paid $14/hr. I still don't know

exactly how we were able to find an apartment and move in in only two weeks,

but we did it. I lasted a mere 6 months. The work was terrible. Upper

management was inept and cared more about sales then they did about the

workers or safety issues with their product. I witnessed production workers pick

up food off the floor and put it back on the processing lines, but I was powerless to

do anything because I needed the job. They also didn't feel I needed the luxury of

sleep, as I never worked the same shift two days in a row. The job was destroying

me, I was depressed and experienced sharp pains in my shoulder after particularly

long shifts. The pain was always gone by the next morning so I didn't think much

of it. My hours became more erratic, I reached my limit soon afterwards and quit.

I turned my energy towards higher education. I had saved up some money, so I

applied to a local university and went back to finish a bachelors. One year later I

graduated with a 4.0 GPA. I thought my life was back on track to where I wanted

to be, I lost a little bit of time, but I was moving forward.

I had a job lined up after graduation. It was for another food company. I can't say

I was happy about the pay, I would have thought a bachelors degree would be

worth more than a 72 cent raise, but I was happy enough to be working again.

The girlfriend and I moved when the lease was due to be renewed, to be closer to

this company. We thought that this job could be long term, they seemed to

actually care about making a quality product and provided a good number of

vacation days.

My last day of work was the Friday after Labor Day, I was covering for a

coworker who was taking a vacation that week. How is that for insulting? To be

fired after working extra hours so soon after a holiday meant to celebrate working

people. I had zero warning, instead I received a phone call on Monday saying I

was no longer employed. I broke down in tears after I hung up the phone. I now

get less than $150 a week from unemployment and am fighting to remain

optimistic, or at least not deeply depressed. It is so frustrating to work so hard for

so little and have it torn away from me. A company will throw any one of their

workers out on the street if they think it will save them a nickel. It is disgusting

and unAmerican, but the way the world has gone.

Dream to nightmare

To set the stage in December of 2008, I was living the American Dream. House,

wife, a daughter and a son on the way. I had a great job I loved as the head of the

advertising department for a 34 location chain grocery store. I did 50% graphic

design and the rest was a grab bag of copy writing, web design, media buying,

social media, administrative and other marketing type work. The department was

in every sense of the word an in-house advertising agency. Just before the

holidays the other full time person in my department found other employment

and I didn't worry too much about it as I assumed the position would be quickly

filled. The first few weeks of the year would be a bit of a challenge though as the

old intern had left and the new one hadn't started. Stressful but nothing I couldn't

handle in the short run.

The new intern started and after several weeks of the position being open my boss

(the owners son-in-law) sat me down and told me why it hadn't been posted. He

was planning on spinning my department off into it's own ad agency and he didn't

want to hire someone who would be a good fit for the grocery store and not for

the ad agency. Seemed risky to me but a good career opportunity. So I agreed to

stick it out for what was promised to be a "few weeks."

So I did the job of two people for what turned out to be six months, the first four I

was coming home to a wife who was going through a tough pregnancy. I had

faith that the hard work would be worth it though in the end. The first week of

June was my 30th birthday on Tuesday. On Thursday we set up the new office.

On Friday I was called into a meeting to finalize the launch of the new agency. In

that meeting I was basically told that in order for the new agency to work it

needed employees that could give 110% and that I had worked very hard the past

six months doing the job of two people and getting the new business ready. So hard

in fact I was visibly burned out (true) and therefor wouldn't be able to give the

required 110%. Pack up my desk and go home. My son was a month and a half.

The next 4 months I looked for a job. My wife, who had been a stay at home

mother, went back to work, third shift at a certain unnamed Canadian coffee

chain. We were still bleeding money, just bleeding slower. I was left home to take

care of the kids, which I loved at first, given the new opportunity to connect with

the kids in ways I hadn't when employed, but eventually the novelty wore off and

I fell into a deep depression. As March rolled around I was in such a bad place I

had to beg my wife for help of some sort. She instead decided to move out and take

the kids, leaving me with the house payment and all the rest of the bills. I spent

most of the next year not leaving the house. I applied for jobs, went on the

occasional interview, sought treatment for the depression, volunteered with the

Red Cross, saw my children and went to the grocery store. There's not much in

rural Ohio. Middle of corn fields is a great place to raise a family. It's hell when

you live alone. I would go days at times without seeing another living soul. Any

trip into town and back was at least two gallons of gas and I simply couldn't afford

it. While I looked for work outside of my field, most were minimum wage jobs,

which would have been fine given the circumstances but my unemployment paid

more than minimum wage and I literally would have had to take a pay cut to

work there, and then had less time to look for a job and interview.

In Feb. 2010 my unemployment ran out, along with all the extensions. I called a

friend and begged her to hire me at the upscale fast food place she worked at. She

did, and I was still bleeding cash. I got a second job telemarketing to lawyers, if

that isn't as bad as it sounds my bosses were former used car sales men. Three

more hated careers have not yet been invented. I now had two jobs and still was

spending more than I made just to keep the lights on. Finally after having hours

cut at both jobs I found a job at a factory that paid a whopping $12 per hour.

Would have been another step in the right direction, however they put me on third

shift, it was the middle of the summer and I my air conditioning hadn't worked in

2 years. The next day my house was 97 degrees inside. I couldn't sleep, I was

delirious and finally fell asleep right about the time my second shift was about to

start.

So out of work again I found work at a cookie factory the next day through a

staffing agency. Hours were erratic, and the pay was less but it was work. I

usually worked 32 hours a week near the ovens in the un-airconditioned part of

the factory. I hated it and may never eat an Oreo again. After about 5 months of

this out of the blue a printer I had worked with at the grocery store called me in

for an interview. The job was way beneath my skill set, but I could put it on my

resume and it had steady hours. It was a bad fit for me and I knew it and they

knew it too but there was a loyalty from our previous business dealings and I was

offered the job on the spot and accepted without hesitation.

The job wasn't hard, but I didn't like it. I had been a legit graphic designer and this

was mostly pre-press work. It wasn't hard, but I could get done in three hours

what it took the previous people in the position an entire day to do. So most of the

time I sat around pretending to look busy. I made it a full 2.5 years without

missing a bill. Then in December of 2011 I suddenly was missing all of them. That

additional stress plus the fact I was didn't like the work and was bored all the time,

they eventually let me go.

By some miracle, I found a job at an ad agency. The bad news it was on the other

side of the state, a 2+ hour drive away from the kids. I didn't see much choice

though as I kinda needed to move out before I the electric was shut off or I was

foreclosed on. So off I went, living for the first month on the couch of an internet

friend I'd never met in real life, in a city I'd never visited before the interview.

I found a cheap apartment and moved in. Finances were turning around, and for

the first time in a long time I was happy. That lasted all of one month as the ad

agency lost its largest client and I was laid off. I moved across the state for a job

that lasted two months, through no fault of my own. Over the next six months I

looked for work, sold the house at a small loss and divorce papers were filed.

Eventually I ran out of money again and am now residing at my parents, in a

third corner of the state, while I await my sister clearing out her attic so I can

move in there.

My unemployment ran out again just today. I'm looking for work, any work right

now. I've been told by one interviewer (at a gas station) that they weren't

interested in me because I had had a desk job, and therefor wasn't likely to stay at

the job I was interviewing for, for very long. Even third shift Waffle House

advertises "Experience Required." As far as the career type job interviews go, most

are for graphic design positions, I feel like most see my portfolio and see that I can

do other things and write me off as over qualified. The other half see I designed

food advertising and write my sample work off as disposable, which most grocery

advertising absolutely is, but that doesn't mean I don't have the talent and skill.

I've done everything I can to stay afloat, eBay and craigslisted possessions, I've

sold blood twice a week for more than a year, I've done freelance work. Still no

end in sight. I still plug away daily though. Still send out applications and still hope

I can find a way to get my life back.

The universe's punching bag

I graduated from college four years ago. I was in a prestigious journalism

program; I knew tons of kids who'd graduated a couple years before I started

college who'd gotten incredible jobs right out of college - as in, being hired directly

by the New York Times, LA Times, or other major papers. I felt like I was set.

Then the economy collapsed, during my last year of college. I spent 6 months

desperately searching for a job while slowly running out of the tiny amount of

money I'd saved working part-time in college, and finally wound up unable to pay

for an apartment anymore. I moved in with my fiance's parents and kept looking.

At long last, I found a job - a receptionist position, paying $10/hour with an HMO,

about half an hour from my home. I'd already sold my car to pay rent, so I had

to bus - an hour-and-a-half commute, two ways, every day. Finally, between the

two of us, my fiance and I managed to scrape together enough money for a down

payment on an apartment in the projects. It was even further from my job than

before, but it was the only place we could afford.

Two months later, my fiance lost his job, and I was now the sole bread-winner.

On $10/hour.

A month after that, I was laid off to balance the budget. "It has nothing to do with

your job performance, you've been great," they said, which is even worse than if I

had done something. If I'd done something, then I could just say "I'll do better

next time" and hopefully not get fired. But if I'm perfect and I still get fired?

I was lucky, I found another shit job again in about two months, right before we

ran out of money again. (My fiance was supporting us doing private tutoring, but

it was pretty unreliable.) This time, I was working for a local synagogue as a

general administrative assistant, and making $12/hour with no benefits, so it was

slightly better.

This was easily the worst job I've ever had... And I couldn't quit. I tried to find

another job, but there were none to be had that would support my household. (My

fiance was now going on two straight years of unemployment.) I tried to consult a

lawyer to see if I could sue for a hostile work environment, but despite the fact

that I was severely depressed and anxious as a result of the job, was developing

stress-related health problems that I couldn't afford to treat because they didn't

provide me with health insurance, and was beginning to have suicidal thoughts, I

was told by lawyer after lawyer I had no grounds to sue them because I wasn't

being discriminated against on the basis of race, gender, or any other "protected

category." I just had to suck it up and keep going.

And then I got laid off. Again. It was also for budgetary reasons, and it was the

second time in two years.

Now I've been unemployed for almost six months. I'm doing some private

tutoring on my own, and I found a part-time data entry job that makes barely

enough for me to just cover my half of the rent (with nothing left over to pay for

food, bills, anything else). I still have a month left of unemployment, so I'm just

desperately saving that money, trying to make it last as long as possible. Thank

God my fiance finally found a job - not enough to pay our living expenses alone,

but it helps. I try to be optimistic about things - I'm looking into freelancing, just

until I find something reliable. But at this point, I feel like the universe's punching

bag. I have literally no confidence that I'll ever be able to do all the things I

dreamed of - own a home, have a family, save for retirement. It doesn't seem like

too much to ask, but so far, the world has said "No."

Previously

The full archive of our "Unemployment Stories" series can be found here.

(http://gawker.com/hello-from-the-underclass/)

[Thanks to everyone who wrote in. You can send your own unemployment story here

(mailto:Hamilton@gawker.com).]

Discuss (/posts/5983361/reply)

71 participants 14 participants

Like 79

PunditGuy and 67 others...

SaitoHawkeye (http://saitoh…

I'm really looking forward to the responses

blaming these people for their troubles. Let

me save some time:

Story 1: They're call her a drunk and say it's

her fault.

Story 2: They' call him a drunk, and say he

should have to choose between service and

work.

Story 3: They'll blame him for his parents

cutting off his tuition and say it's his own

fault.

Story 4: Not sure, this one is pretty much

unimpeachable.

Story 5: "You should have majored in

STEM!" (ignoring story 3)

To anyone making these arguments - I hope

you the LAPD shoot you in the back, you

fucking cunts.

2/11/13 1:18pm (http://gawker.com/im-really-looking-forward-to-the-responses-blaming-thes-477141661)

(/posts/477141661/reply)

Dear Zeus (http://dearzeus.…

Sad, isn't it? Volume 26 and people -still-

come out of the woodwork to talk about how

easy everything is. I'm also starting to think

some of them don't even know what STEM

is an acronym for...

2/11/13 1:22pm (http://gawker.com/sad-isnt-it-volume-26-and-people-still-come-out-of-477141663)

(/posts/477141663/reply)

kcunning (http://kcunning.ki…

These actually seem way easier to relate to

than some of the other ones. Some of the

previous ones, I'd cringe, because it felt like

they were just setting them up for harsh

critiques.

2/11/13 1:31pm (http://gawker.com/these-actually-seem-way-easier-to-relate-to-than-some-o-477141672)

(/posts/477141672/reply)

callmekatina and 10 others...

terrymct (http://terrymct.kinj…

" I had some education and it was in a

STEM field, I had been hearing all my life

about the value of a technical education. It

amounted to little more than nothing. "

I've worked in the biological sciences for

decades. You really need a grad degree to go

anywhere. A bachelors will get you a tech

job. Depending on the field within biological

sciences, a masters will get you a lab

manager position or something at a

consulting firm. The people with the

doctorates tend to run the research

programs. Sure, there are exceptions and

some variability within disciplines, but

overall you need as much education as you

can get. An associates degree won't do a

whole lot for you even in the best of times.

2/11/13 1:34pm (http://gawker.com/i-had-some-education-and-it-was-in-a-stem-field-i-ha-477141673)

(/posts/477141673/reply)

tmthomas (http://tmthomas…

Shhh...the company line is that STEM

degrees are infallible, a magic wand and the

cure to all economic blight. If we let people

know we have the same issues as any other

field, what will we lord over them? Our

pocket protectors and D&D miniatures?

2/11/13 2:52pm (http://gawker.com/shhh-the-company-line-is-that-stem-degrees-are-infall-477141774)

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R W (http://ryangauthier.kinj…

whats your degree? theater tech?

2/11/13 3:13pm (http://gawker.com/whats-your-degree-theater-tech-477141807)

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12 participants

R W (http://ryangauthier.kinj…

"I was going to a small liberal arts school in

the mountains of North Carolina."

WOOPS!

Miltary idiot blames liberals. Shoulda stayed

in if you have no skills.

Ass.

College kid. So take out loans and finish?

American Dream. A media job in rural ohio?

Media buying? WTF is that? Reading shit on

gawker?

Journalism. No one needs more people

writing blogs, sorry.

2/11/13 2:40pm (http://gawker.com/i-was-going-to-a-small-liberal-arts-school-in-the-moun-477141755)

(/posts/477141755/reply)34 participants

MaryToddLincoln1 (http://ma…

This sounds terrible, but after reading that

the "Congressional Staffer" got a job doing

disability claims with the VA and then totally

spun out of control, I lost any pity that I had

for that person. I work with Vets and I can

not tell you the countless hardships that they

are experiencing because the VA cannot get

their act together and finish their disability

claims.

2/11/13 1:23pm (http://gawker.com/this-sounds-terrible-but-after-reading-that-the-congr-477141665)

(/posts/477141665/reply)

SaitoHawkeye (http://saitoh…

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MaltedLaurelBridge and 8 others...

A. Nonie Meus (http://anonie…

I know you are being an ass on purpose, but

I gotta say I think a lot of people in the past

10 years have been duped into vague

"media" jobs where they write crap for no-

name blogs all day. This was going to be

THE FUTURE in 2003. A lot of people

thought they were making a calculated

decision back then. Kind of like people now

who are rushing to "STEM" fields because

that's THE FUTURE.

2/11/13 2:50pm (http://gawker.com/i-know-you-are-being-an-ass-on-purpose-but-i-gotta-say-477141769)

(/posts/477141769/reply)

R W (http://ryangauthier.kinj…

That is just where all the people who would

have gotten a job at the local paper end up.

STEM is the future. It is the present. It was

the past too.

But many people can't do math. Hell, the

type of people doing the social media jobs are

proud of their non-math.

2/11/13 3:10pm (http://gawker.com/that-is-just-where-all-the-people-who-would-have-gotten-477141802)

(/posts/477141802/reply)

knopster and 30 others...

How is it her fault? It sounded like the

institutional failure of the VA gave her a

nervous breakdown because she was

working too hard/caring too much.

2/11/13 1:26pm (http://gawker.com/how-is-it-her-fault-it-sounded-like-the-institutional-477141668)

emdroid (http://emdroid.kinj…

You need to feel extreme pity for each of

these people in each of these volumes, for it

does not matter what we do or say in life or

how we act or what choices we make or how

we cope with problems that face us or how

we overcome challenges, because Bad

Economy.

2/11/13 1:31pm (http://gawker.com/you-need-to-feel-extreme-pity-for-each-of-these-people-477141671)

(/posts/477141671/reply)

10 participants

Redbrick Hellpigeon (http://t…

I got a job recently - it's well paid and with

at least two years worth of contract before I

have to start worrying. So why do I feel so

shite?

Well, there's all the people who applied for

the job or, worse, went to the interview.

That's yet another rejection for a lot of

people, and - until recently - that was me

too. It seems rather pyrrhic. There are

hundreds of other people just like me who

are still in the same situation I was in two

weeks ago and, had things not gone my way,

where I would still be now.

Then there is the toll being unemployed

takes on you. I've surprised myself by feeling

utterly worn out and lethargic. The stress

makes you fat or painfully thin. Minus a

brief two and a half month temporary

contract, I've been jobless for almost a year.

Once you realise you don't have to keep

fighting to keep your spirits up, apply for

three jobs a day and not have to worry about

being homeless, the body and mind finally

give in and the exhaustion - not to mention,

the hopelessness you've had to stave off day

by day, week by week, month by month -

sets in. It's like collapsing at the end of a

marathon. You finally get to fall to pieces.

There is also the sense that it doesn't seem

real, that it might be taken away at any

minute. Every time there is an issue with my

contract or my attempts to relocate, the grim

sense of foreboding comes back. This is

where it goes wrong again. This is where

reality reasserts itself. This has lead to a lot of

annoyed administrators wondering why I

keep ringing up with a panicked tone of

voice. It's just that they've been in a job for

(/posts/477141700/reply)

14 participants

Missy Pants and 10 others...

Shiro_Kabocha (http://shiro_…

The "novelty" of raising his own children

wore off? What a dick.

2/11/13 1:31pm (http://gawker.com/the-novelty-of-raising-his-own-children-wore-off-wha-477141670)

(/posts/477141670/reply)

kcunning (http://kcunning.ki…

Betcha he thinks his wife 'plays' with the kids

all day, too.

2/11/13 1:37pm (http://gawker.com/betcha-he-thinks-his-wife-plays-with-the-kids-all-day-477141676)

(/posts/477141676/reply)

99Crayons (http://99crayon…

I thought that at first too, but I think he

may have just meant, the novelty of being at

home and not at work wore off. At least I

hope he meant it that way....

2/11/13 1:53pm (http://gawker.com/i-thought-that-at-first-too-but-i-think-he-may-have-ju-477141687)

(/posts/477141687/reply)

12 participants

tmthomas (http://tmthomas…

I was feeling for military man until he had

to throw in the "misguided liberal policies"

BS about TARP and such. Yes, because

conservative policies squarely favor the

working poor and veteran's rights.

2/11/13 2:28pm (http://gawker.com/i-was-feeling-for-military-man-until-he-had-to-throw-in-477141736)

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rokokobang (http://rokokob…

(/posts/477141746/reply)

the last few years. I haven't. Fear makes us

overcompensate. Shame makes us wonder if

this isn't a dream.

Finally, there is the awful sense that this

wasn't down to you. The interview went well

because they liked you, not because you tried

hard or spent hours practising beforehand.

Everything you've spent so much time doing

turned out to be useless. It's just a cross

between a beauty paegent and a roulette

wheel. You've spent a fortune going to

dozens of interviews and none of it mattered.

They decided not to give you the gig the

moment they heard your voice or saw you

walk through the door. Skills, ability,

motivation - none of it matters. All that

matters is that an interview panel glances at

you for a second and then decides you're not

one of them. It's so much wasted effort. You

have the horrible feeling that you could have

saved a lot of time and not tried at all. Or

turned up at your successful interview,

wearing nothing but a bin bag and reeking

of sewage. They'd have probably given you

the job anyway.

Interviews are tough now. You're lucky if

you only get three or four judgemental

arseholes interrogating you for half an hour.

(And if that panel includes some utterly

miserable bitch from HR staring at you like

you've just buggered her daughter's guinea

pig, you may as well just stratch your nose,

scream 'PISSFLAPS!' and then walk out.)

I've been interviewed by up to 15 people for

one job; a six hour ordeal where you are

constantly scrutinised by people who don't

like you anyway. And then there are the

twats who make no effort to even hide their

contempt for you - the ones who ask you

why it took you longer to get a PhD than it

did for them, or the ones who insinuate that

you're lying about your qualifications, or the

one who laughs in your face when you give

an answer they don't want to hear.

Some say this is just 'bad cop' questioning

which you're meant to endure, like taking

abuse with a smile is somehow a test of

character rather than the strong shitting on

the weak that it really is. But it's just an

excuse for cowards to talk to others in a

fashion that would lead to a beating on the

street, or a glassing in a pub. It begs the

question as to why the workplace is full of

such arseholes, when in fact the truth is

obvious - they're the ones who do best in a

system that rewards iniquitous scum and

jobsworths.

DanniellaBee and 8 others...

That threw me off too - demonstrates a

major lack of understanding of what

actually happened and why.

2/11/13 2:34pm (http://gawker.com/that-threw-me-off-too-demonstrates-a-major-lack-of-un-477141746)

tripsonthestars (http://tripso…

He needs to blame someone for his problem,

so it's his wife and the government. Future

MRA, most likely.

2/11/13 2:40pm (http://gawker.com/he-needs-to-blame-someone-for-his-problem-so-its-his-w-477141757)

(/posts/477141757/reply)

4 participants

OrvGull and one other...

A. Nonie Meus (http://anonie…

Many of these stories are stark reminders

that crises like unemployment can seriously

exacerbate depression and other preexisting

illnesses.

2/11/13 2:33pm (http://gawker.com/many-of-these-stories-are-stark-reminders-that-crises-l-477141744)

(/posts/477141744/reply)

odbdmx (http://odbdmx.kinj…

Hey Nonie- my therapist and psychiatrist

have been trying to figure that out for over a

year now. One thing is for sure- it

exacerbates everything which are considered

stressors. All I know is that I did really well

in undergrad and grad. Worked as a reporter

successfully even with my boss harassing me

and alway being on deadline. I only got

involved in politics to work on a campaign,

then I got sucked into work full-time. The

only reason why I did it was for the health

insurance. I swear everything was exactly

true and real life is not always so simple or

wrapped up into a tiny package. Thanks for

speaking out for the complexities.

2/11/13 3:53pm (http://gawker.com/hey-nonie-my-therapist-and-psychiatrist-have-been-tryi-477141836)

(/posts/477141836/reply)

raincoaster (http://raincoast…

I think this is one of the most important

functions of this feature. People just do not

understand what it's like inside the head of a

person facing chronic unemployment when

they've been brought up to expect to be in

demand. Truly, there but for the grace of god

go any of us, at any moment. Two years

ago, I was in such a bad situation that my

hair was falling out from a combination of

stress and malnourishment. People who

haven't been through it can't, at least

without these stories, imagine what it's like.

And that safety net? Let's just say it's easy to

fall through the holes, as the note about food

stamps above indicates.

2/11/13 6:39pm (http://gawker.com/i-think-this-is-one-of-the-most-important-functions-of-477141919)

(/posts/477141919/reply)

8 participants

Redbrick Hellpigeon and 6 others...

I can't give any advice or words of

inspiration to those who haven't had the luck

that I've had. (And fuck off to those who

think luck is something you make. They are

the dicks who keep rolling 20s and wonder

why other people can't.) I can only say how

sorry I am, and how I wish your turn will

come far sooner than we both know it will.

Take care, and fuck the politicians and

bankers who keep this recession dragging on

for ever more.

2/11/13 2:12pm (http://gawker.com/i-got-a-job-recently-its-well-paid-and-with-at-least-477141700)

Otaqueen (http://otaqueen.k…

Fellow (or sister) gamer, your analogy about

rolling 20s is spot-on. Because it hasn't

happened to them, some of the "lucky ones"

assume it can't be true for others. And it's so

easy to say it's "someone's own fault,"

especially if one is trying to avoid the

discomfort of having to feel empathy, or

acknowledge the many graces from Lady

Fortune that one has been granted.

Less seriously, what does "glassing" mean? I

watch a lot of British TV but haven't come

across this one. :-)

2/11/13 3:18pm (http://gawker.com/fellow-or-sister-gamer-your-analogy-about-rolling-20-477141815)

(/posts/477141815/reply)

LongLiveBonkers (http://lon…

The miserable bitch from HR, no truer

words have been spoken. I've been on the job

hunt and you pretty much nailed that one. I

once had an interview turn into a three hour

ordeal including taking a microsoft office

skills assement test for an executive assistant

job. It's not that I minded taking the test, but

would have appreciated a heads up. And

then my follow up interview got cancelled

becuase NYC shut down thanks to Sandy

and then I guess I got lost in the shuffle or

they decided they didn't need the position

after all, or whatever, you just never

understand how it was that you were getting

close to something and then nothing

happens. I've been unemployed before but

I've never had such a hard time getting a job

this go around.

2/11/13 3:24pm (http://gawker.com/the-miserable-bitch-from-hr-no-truer-words-have-been-s-477141820)

(/posts/477141820/reply)

VeryShinyLikeAHoliday (http…

"I decided not to collect unemployment." I'm

sincerely asking: why? The money is there.

It's not much (not enough to live in in major

cities) but every bit helps. Why not use it?

2/11/13 1:30pm (http://gawker.com/i-decided-not-to-collect-unemployment-im-sincerely-a-477141669)

(/posts/477141669/reply)

kcunning (http://kcunning.ki…

I have friends who have done the same.

Sometimes, it's because they're getting some

other benefit that they'd stop getting if they

pulled unemployment (such as tuition or

training). Other times, they just want to be

able to say that they've never pulled

unemployment.

2/11/13 1:34pm (http://gawker.com/i-have-friends-who-have-done-the-same-sometimes-its-b-477141674)

(/posts/477141674/reply)

Autocadaver (http://brendan…

Honestly, I found unemployment to be a

real hindrance since I do freelance computer

drafting on the side. Don't get me wrong, the

bennies saved my ass for several months

right after my layoff and while I moved back

to my hometown, but whenever I would do

some freelance work it would take weeks of

filling out forms (sent by snail-mail of

course), having them call me and ask about

whether I was still employed with this

person (no, it was contract work for a few

hundred dollars) then have them call me

back a few weeks later asking the same

questions about the same client. Since I have

several regular clients it would turn into a

real echo chamber. Sometimes payments

would stop if I did freelance work, even if it

wasn't enough to override that week's

payments (if you make more in a week than

you would from a UI payment you don't get

UI for that week which makes sense)

because they would think that I was still

'employed' even though I had repeatedly

explained the situation, and at that point I

would have to reapply. Admittedly, if I had

been officially 'self-employed' that probably

would have made things easier but at the

time I was just desperately grabbing

whatever work I could including washing

windows and cleaning industrial kitchen

equipment. I've since gotten a DBA (Doing

Business As) which has helped with getting a

loan for new software and goes a long way

toward legitimacy since freelancing is where

most of my money comes from now.

(/posts/477141698/reply)

5 participants

odbdmx and 4 others...

They also don't want you to go to school,

which I can kind of understand because it

might make you less available for certain

types of work, but it's like - really? I'm trying

to update my skillset and increase my

chances of getting a job and you'd rather I

just sit on my ass waiting for rejection

letters?

Eventually my benefits from the state where

I had been working ran out and I had the

option to transfer over to benefits from my

home state where I currently reside, and I

just said thanks but no thanks - since then

I've had some false starts but things are

looking up.

2/11/13 2:10pm (http://gawker.com/honestly-i-found-unemployment-to-be-a-real-hindrance-s-477141698)

Hooray4Anything and 1 others...

DoraDoraBoBora (http://dor…

I feel like stories like these are so important

because they give so much context to those

of us who are fortunate enough to be

employed. When you're in our position, it's

easy to say "Well, why don't they just ___"

or "That would never have happened if you'd

___" and it's important to be reminded that

sometimes you can be doing everything you

should and working your ass off and

sometimes life just happens in unpleasant

ways you couldn't have anticipated, and the

stigma of unemployed people somehow

supposedly being lazy or whatever doesn't

make it any easier. (Especially when I know

so many jobs these days only want people

who are ALREADY employed.) My best

wishes go out to you guys and anyone

experiencing their own unemployment story.

You deserve better.

2/11/13 1:20pm (http://gawker.com/i-feel-like-stories-like-these-are-so-important-because-477141662)

(/posts/477141662/reply)

DanniellaBee (http://danniell…

I completely agree with you. The arrogance

of so many people in our position of being

employed and financially stable is appalling

to me. These stories prove time and time

again that no matter how hard you work

your entire life can be pulled out from under

you. This could be any of us in a flash!

Everyone who submits these stories has

nothing but my sympathy, respect and

concern.

2/11/13 2:46pm (http://gawker.com/i-completely-agree-with-you-the-arrogance-of-so-many-p-477141762)

(/posts/477141762/reply)

Otaqueen (http://otaqueen.k…

I agree. It's so easy to snap back that it was

harder for YOU, than YOU sucked it up and

triumphed, that YOU think it's everyone

else's own fault. How about some empathy?

It may not have been YOUr personal

experience, but that doesn't make it untrue

for others.

2/11/13 3:13pm (http://gawker.com/i-agree-its-so-easy-to-snap-back-that-it-was-harder-fo-477141806)

(/posts/477141806/reply)

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