As we creep into beautiful, tantalizing Chapter 11, it's pretty quiet on the home front.But it was time for Waynell to wakey-wakey and start her day!It was also the morning for her big beauty moment! Her momentary place in the sun! To see that overwhelming Fresnfruity potential! First however, was a potty stop. Hey, how was she to know she was about to become beautiful?

Well eh- hm. We have good news and bad news, folks!The good news is that underneath that pageboy haircut(see the last slide) Waynell was hiding some ginormous, saucer-sized ears. At least we have a toddler cut that will sort of show those off. At least.~ ~ On the other hand ~ ~The bad news is that she is freakishly button-cute everywhere else. * sadly shakes head *No amount of zany makeup can possibly disguise her horrifically malformed genetics!This poor kid will never see any higher learning after all.

For some reason this does not surprise me that this is where we found Grandpa at 3:02 a.m.

At the same time of morning, this is where we found Wilford, awake and doing his homework. He is a busy kid during the day after all, and with college now on the brain, well!

What's better after a fun-zapping bout with the homework than a round or two with SSSx3!(Also it's a good excuse to show off that smexy profile, despite him being the chinless wonder that he is.)

Jessie needs two more body points to max out for his next promotion.However I don't think he's quite feeling like he's got that Nose of the Porcupine.You remember? The Feet of the Weasel? It was something along those lines anyway. . .You'd be sick of running up those figurative steps too if you'd been doing the victory laps as long as he has!

Why hello Phyllis! You seem to attract men wherever you go, don't you?Is this The Goose that Laid the Golden Egg all over again? Is she gonna have a conga line behind her before long?

We check back in at the house to find Waynell dreamily playing in her baby-slop.Is this about a boy already? Is there some even cuter set of diapers at daycare you'd care to tell us about Waynie?? *eyeballs the absent-minded toddler sternly*

Oh my star-spangled lederhosen! So many walk-bys today!But you- no. Get out of here. Go away Onoshi!

Keep on going Jessie! You still have another skill-point to get after this one.Who's my trooper? Who's my sassy little trooper??

Checking up on everyone, we find Grandma Tootie helping Waynell learn to talk.Say gram-ma! She instructed in her gloriously manly falsetto.Way-sin! Waynell declared proudly. Wait- did she just call her grandmother a raisin?!*sighs, Look, I have an inkling that this may be one of Tootie's last great contributions, so don't blow it kid.

Apparently Jessie has decided that all of that learning to talk made Waynell filthy. Tubby-time for you little girl!

That evening we discover that Wilford has taken a liking to- who else- Kendal Lawson.

Annd up on the third floor, at 11:42 p.m., Waynell is up and potty-trained! *snort * fabulous, Fluticasone murmured, still half awake and foggy-headed.

Here's a nice overview of the moment:Jessie's about to poop out but has almost gotten his last body point, and Earline's working on her homework assisted by Loki, who's been trying to get his creativity skill back up since he came back from death.

Grandpa Loki

Earline

Tootie still has 34 vacation days accrued at her job from working since day 1 of this whole legacy.I'ma make a judgement-call and say that since she's nearing her end I think she'll be okay NOT going to work the remaining day or so of her life, without actually retiring and taking the pay-cut.

Yay!(again) Jessie has completely maxed out his body skill-points! I do believe he has enough to get promoted now. Does anyone have a trumpet I can borrow? And also a music teacher?

With three days left before Waynell is a child, Fluticasone has decided to take one of her own days off to teach her daughter to walk.What are you all panicking for? The balcony/pathway is totally the safe place to do this. Waynell will become a mountain goat in no time at all with this training.Correction: A cute little mountain-goat!

Fluticasone, why are you putting Waynell in her crib?! She's a tough kid and walking lessons'd probably only take a few more hours unless. . . *gasps *Waynell hasn't already learned to walk has she? Has she??Crap, she can't answer me. XD

One early evening at dinner Tootie was musing a bit on her theoretical afterlife; just throwing some ideas around before she actually got there. . .

Do you think I'll be able to get some kind of receptionist job in this afterlife? Tootie queried, I'm bound to get awfully bored you know.

If you wanted it you could probably get a job in construction, mother, Fluticasone suggested helpfully.

Well I always did have a thing for pneumatic nail guns, oh my stars yes! And wrenches. . . Tootie began to get giddy with excitement at the prospect.

Just think of all of the lovely cloud-buildings I could make! Tootie gushed happily.Uh huh, you're right mom! Jessie agreed, nodding.No one really wanted to burst the poor woman's bubble to explain that a 'delightfully off-kilter' elderly lady running around with a nail gun, shooting nails at clouds was probably not the best idea ever conceived.

What about rockets?Earline asked awhile later, don't you want to learn to build rockets in the clouds too?Everyone left at the table gawked at her blankly, as though the girl had just sprouted seven heads.Why would your grandmother be interested in rocket-building darling? Fluticasone asked gently.I guess Earline just hasn't had much practice conceptualizing yet. Foolish teenager!

Meanwhile Wilford is still quietly picking up college scholarships, to be ready if and when he goes. .For earning that eighth creativity skill-point, Wilford has added the Quigley Visual Arts Stipend to his stack- o- scholarships, and it's worth $750!

But why am I hearing hula music??

Well folks, Tootie passed at 1:21 a.m. on a Thursday, sim-time. She got the guilded tombstone, as Loki did, for achieving her lifetime want. Now where is Loki at this important moment in his wife's final moments?

Are we all that surprised? No, not really. Lol.Who knows, maybe he'll spell out Tootie's name in car-tracks in the dirt. :-)Loki is also in a handy place for one other thing. . .

Poor Zombie-Loki got to the fridge the next morning and began weeping all over again when he realized there was no one left who had the knowledge to make Squirrel-Cake Medley tacos for breakfast anymore.How does anyone go on??

Down in the basement, Earline awoke terrified, to the realization that no one would be there to comfort her from dreams about 'The Flaming Moth-Spiders that Ate All the Dried Fruit' any longer, nightmares which had plagued her since childhood, when she saw the film.

Aww, even little Waynell had a good cry, up on the third floor, but not before her morning potty.Nothing comes before morning potty!

Of course mama Fluticasone knew just what to do to ease all of their woes:It's a Salmon & Pancake breakfast!It always turns so golden and happy in my tummy! Wilford said to his dad as the other serving platter was brought out.Uh huh, yeah! Jessie nodded as though he understood perfectly, while casting a worried side-glance at his wife.

Wilford came to pick up his little sister so she could have her breakfast.Come on little girl, it's time to eat! he said with his enthusiastic face on.Waynell simply made mopey, unintelligible noises.

Big brother is okay at times like these, but daddy, even freaky-looking daddy with horrid makeup, bad hair and about a million piercings in his face, does a much better job of making it All Better. Awww. . .

2. One of her fears has a good chance of coming true also.

1. Despite doing a normal teenagerly thing like watching t.v., Earline's mind is on other things. She seems to suspect exactly where my plans are going, at least in one respect. :-)

3. Wilford, you too?! I'm sensing a pattern here.

4. Of course Grandpa Loki wants to resurrect Tootie. I think we have a winner!

Later, after Waynell'd had a nice nap, I posed a question to her:Waynell my dear, how'd you like to have a birthday? She doesn't look so sure. Lol. . We'll come back another time, give her awhile to think about it.

Miss Earline's home from work and man-oh-man, what a day!At school(earlier that day) she had tossed a chair across the classroom, earning a spot on the football team annnd a body point!(Probably) as a result, Earline has been promoted to the top of the Adventurer career for teensas. . . Multi-Regional Sim of Some Question(ta-daa)!!How you doin'?

Waynell has had lots of mommy and daddy-time and is pretty well set right again; just in time for her birthday!

Good news! Jessie got home from work just in time for his daughter's birthday into childhood!Grandpa is on his way up from his basement quarters, and Earline is sleeping through the party this time.

*In other words, if we got Earline up to the dining room it'd be harder to keep her awake long enough and then get her back to bed than to just leave her alone. :-)

Well now! Waynell's aspiration level (as a toddler)ended up being Miracle Mite!Zombie Grandpa Loki ended up being late. . . but enthusiastic nonetheless.We won't even get into the birthday-girl's genetics. Why spoil the party?Now let's all get to the cake part. . . .

What happened to the freaking cake??! Waynell got a slice and then it disappeared from the table!Wilford! Did you clean up the cake before anyone else could even get a slice?? Oh good job kid.I did a good? Wilford asked hopefully.. . . Sort of, Fluticasone assured him, but we'll work on your timing another day.

How can Wilford make up for tossing out the cake?Let's see. . he has five cooking points. . . macaroni & cheese should make a nice cake-replacement right?

Success! Fully edible mac n' cheese!Now where's the birthday girl?

There she is, in the third-floor bathroom! And she grew up in pink camouflage?! How very hillbilly of her.(chant with me) One of us! One of us!

We decided before that since Zombie-Grandpa Loki was the only one of three that wanted to resurrect Tootie but didn't fear doing so, that he'd be the one to actually dial the reaper's number.So, at a little over $2,000 , it's quite the bargain to have Grandma Tootifer back in our midst. :-)

Ah, the aroma of a rotting zombie, fresh from the grave, eh Loki? Breathe that noxious perfume in. . .

Hello Tootie, you gorgeous thing! That's right lurch on over and give us a hug! Aww look, she still knows her maker - I'm touched.Hey wait! She's not coming for me. . .

She's going. . . to play with the remote-control car. Of course.Fresh out of the ground, and the first thing on her mind is that toy. * huffsSo- we'll see you in a bit then?

Well whadaya know, Tootie DID eventually come into the house!But who wouldn't come in out of the weather when they're having cheeseburgers for breakfast?So ma, what were the dead like? Fluticasone asked curiously.Actually, they were lovely conversationalists, Tootie responded.

Meanwhile downstairs. . Yeeeww Gramma smells! Waynell commented rudely to her sister.You wanted her back, Earline reminded her sister without looking up from her homework, happy birthday kiddo.

Wilford, being a journalist at heart, has never had a need for body skill-points and has been getting a little pudgy.Getting a few reps in before school, he earned 2 body points!

Waynell's first day at public school is on a Friday.That means they'll have the weekend to get her into private school so she can follow in her siblings' (and really the rest of the family's)footsteps.

If there's such a thing as a bathing beauty, can there be bathing uglies?At the very least she won't be modeling for 'The Birth of Venus' anytime soon. This zombie-Education Minister at least needs a bubble bath before attempting work in one hour.

Looks like zombie-Grandpa Loki still has the old savvy!He (also an Education Minister) implemented a computer game calledBixby Rabbit and the Great Spelling Carrot, which was so successful at teaching the kids to spell that Loki was awarded $45,000!

Three cheers for Bixby Rabbit!! zombie-Grandma Tootie cheered at the top of her decrepit lungs.

Fluticasone is working on earning her final skill-point before she has maxed out all(of her) skills. Can you guess what one skill-point she might be lacking?

Did I ever mention that career-reward objects are awesome? Let's add the fact that they can make sim kids look cuter(as if that were possible) to the list of perks.Instead of just talking to her reflection for charisma, Waynell has opted to use the Execu-putter, and simultaneously have a little fun while upping her skill level. The mind boggles!

At long last Fluticasone has reached the end of her skilling journey!She has gotten that final charisma point and therefore maxed out all of her skills.No more study-time for you, mama!

As with most of the family, Waynell apparently has a fascination with music. Or her sister. Or both.Reasons aside, the young-'un has been watching Earline practice for several hours(in game-time) now.

Well, whatever keeps ya entertained, kiddo.

The time has officially come for zombie Grandma and Grandpa to move out and make room for others.They've decided they'd like a nice cemetery to settle down in; this way they can be off on their own, living forever, but also have a chance to randomly photo-bomb a scene now and then. As a parting gift, Wilford hands his Grandpa a bottle of Elixir of Life - you know, something that will go with any decor.

Introducing Freshnfruity Memorial Cemetery:- A pleasant place to spend your afterlife -

Here we are just inside Grandma and Grandpa Freshnfruity's lavish new home.It's starting out as basic as I could make it, giving Grandma free rein to spruce it up with throw-pillows later. :-)Rather than take up the rest of this chapter with a full tour, I thought it'd be nicer to dedicate a separate link to that, which will be provided with a spoiler-warning.Let us continue on with the chapter. . .

With his Elixir of Life parting-gift tucked away(somewhere), Grandpa Loki shuffled off through the deep snow to join Grandma Tootie in the waiting taxi, which would presumably then take them away to a pretty darned nice place, if not paradise.We'll visit you when you have a chance to settle in! Fluticasone called to her departing father.In a cemetery?! Loki called back over his shoulder, Yeah right!

What did she say, twitchy-munchkins? Tootie asked from off-camera.Eh, something about tartar sauce; let's go, my feet are getting cold. Loki responded a bit sadly.

A few minutes later, the house began to feel empty again.So Jessie went out and got a hawk!Everyone, say hello to Jebediah!Knowing their past history with birds, this should go juusstt fiiinne. Uh huh.

Earline, however, is not adjusting so well. My dear, you're starting to worry your creator.As Jebediah has his first(and definitely not last) frantic flight around the dining room, it barely phases our girl.There's no one up at this hour and yet she calmly cooks a turkey dinner and sets a place for three, as though waiting on two guests. O.O

Jebediah?? Are you dead already?!Holy hamster- bits; somebody poisoned the -erm- drinking hole?

There went that idea! Perhaps they need to change pet stores.His obituary will say He got stuck, just like all of the others.

Jeebus Hot-sticks-Cripes! Earline has come to the conclusion that when one makes chili, you're not supposed to make it THIS hot!

Fortunately, with the smoke-alarm blaring as it does, this brings fire-fighter Kimberly Monif to the rescue!Don't worry about it! Kimberly yells over the noise of the extinguisher and the alarm, It's all right, a lot of people make this mistake! Whew! Earline yells back, That's really good to know!

This dining room is becoming a zoo! Looks like Earline's Social Bunny and this random penguin are both lining up for some good-ol' home-made burnt-up chili. Come and get yourself a bowl, animal-friends!

The Headmaster, Matthew Gibson, is here to see whether Waynell is fit for going to private school.The penguin, a little sad that he can't be in on the action, politely leaves. :-(

After a fine lobster dinner, Fluticasone was busily schmoozing with the headmaster over coffee for 10 bonus points.Oh yes little Waynie's won SO many awards; did I tell you about that one for bear-training? Mr. Tinkles was such a good subject for a grown black bear!

'Little Waynie' on the other hand, had found a place back near the formal dining room to chat with River Smith about her possible future in higher education.In your new school, you'll be expected to carve out a bust of yourself in marble, he informed her.Really? Waynell replied nervously.

Jessie went outside and tried for 10 more points(not getting greedy at all, nooo)by making mixed drinks at the bar. No one showed. Is he c-c-coming out? Jessie called to the house, his teeth chattering as he stood in the snow.

With 1:31 left on the clock, they got a final score(for the visit) of 120/90!All Headmaster Gibson left with was the heady( and magnificent, let's not forget that) stench of Freshnfruity on himself.

After the headmaster was gone, I went searching to see what Jessie was up to:He'll be out soon, no pwobwem, Jessie said through a mouthful of drink.

Poor Jessie, it's just not his night! First he gets ditched in the confusion during the headmaster's visit.Now, Earline's finally getting the social/fun time that she needed and she's in a properly ornery mood.Uh oh. There's a teenager in a good mood, look out!My tomato beats your alphabet-block so nyaaaa!! She sassed her father, who'd joined her at SSSX3.I wanna get a tomato! Jessie sniffed poutily.

After running her father off for the night, Earline was doing Just Fine If You Please when Waynell sat down to watch the game currently in progress.Of course she then got all worked up because Earline had the blood-lust, playing as a beetle with marshmallow boxing gloves.Punch the worm! Waynelle cheered, Punch the bumble-bee! GARTER-SNAKE!!she shrieked.

Waynell will be getting on the school bus by herself today. How'd you feel about that, kiddo?I got this, she replied, with an epic dose of steel resolve.

While Wilford waited to go to college, he decided to call Grandpa Loki and give him the news.Isn't he supposed to be resting, kid? You know, undisturbed?Of course all we can catch of the conversation is Wilfrod's side of it, but it's enough.Isn't that great Gran'pa? Will you make sure and tell- Wilford broke off as he listened, whadaya mean 'but is my hair on fleek'?!

Up on the third floor, Fluticasone and Jessie have been getting suspiciously chummy again. It's probably nothing.

What's that you say? Fluticasone's back in her sleepwear leaf crown?Again, it's most likely nothing. Probably didn't miss anything of any importance whatsoever.What do you mean you don't trust me?

See? Off to work, just like always.

Jessie came downstairs after that latest nothing happened to find his youngest about to entertain herself on the SSSX3.When does a father not want to engage his daughter in a little extracurricular good-times?Waynie, your older siblings are going off to college, d'ya wanna play 'Hot Shots & Karbie Dolls' with me in a couple of minutes?Okay, Waynell replied.

Waynell sees the last teen(of the moment) off to college.Bye gopher-guts! She called to her older brother.So-long there, you lil' short stack of puddin' packets! Wilford yelled back in kind.'Ooh, he's getting good at that,' Waynell thought to herself as she waved.

Fluticasone? Are you getting the cheesecake cravings again?* gulps * Nope. Nothing happened, she said quickly.But isn't that the kind of thing someone says when they're caught fork-handed?

What's this face for?? You wanted the dumb orchard tree. The ladybugs eat the bugs that sometimes infest those trees.You can't have one without the other, y'know?

P.s.: She still stopped at 45/18. LOL.

Waynell wants to be friends with a girl named Demi Chun, but hung up at the half-way point to being friends!

Okay, you're calling Demi back to bug her some more!To heck with school!More road-sign talk!

I know, I sound completely sympathetic. XD

Jessie has ALMOST maxed out his charisma skill - which he wants to do - and which might enable him to take a swig or two of Elixir of Life.Got that?

However he's fighting me All. The. Way.'I need to shower!' 'I'm too tired!' 'I'm hungry!'Blah, blah, blah; needs! Sheesh man.

There now Jessie; don't you feel better? I think he feels better.

Goody! Waynell still wanted to be friends with Demi after school. Go to it!A little head's up though, kid- the 'existence of aliens' topic normally warrants a grand-scale nerd-alert and is not one for the cool kids, if that's the image you're after.

Looks like Waynell's efforts paid off, finally.Doesn't that just pull at your gooshy little heart-muscles?Hello there Demi Chun!

Well! Fluticasone has come home from work just in time to show off her- WHAT?! Baby-bump??!*gasps* Color me surprised! (not really)How do you suppose this keeps happening? She mused, Oh wait- ooohhh, now I get it.

With mama Fluticasone home, Nicole the nanny is free to leave. Except. . . she kinda forgot something.What that? It's fine; what a bunch of worry-warts! It'll be perfectly okay when I come back tomorrow.

Cheesecake again?? Talk about giving your kid early-onset diabetes!Nope. You don't see anything, Fluticasone mumbled as she passed by the camera.Now it's one thing to lie to your narrator when you're not showing yet, but this is pushing it!

The nanny, along with Waynell's little friend, Donte Lew, have been helping themselves to this money tree today, which grows actual, spendable sim-money.Grabby little sims aren't they?

* sigh * Daddy-do Jessie is now short 7 friends since Wilford and Earline went off to college.Waynell must now make friends with a money-thief in order to help her ol' dad out.Yeah, heh heh, Waynell chuckled, feigning enthusiasm, ladybugs; what's up with those things anyway?

I heard that it was their magical fairy-ladybug powers that enabled them to poop tiny marshmallow-poops precisely where they want to! Waynell told Donte informatively. Whaaat?! Donte exclaimed, taken aback, Nuh-uh, you're WEIRD!

I read that it was their ghost -ladybug powers, not their stupid fairy ones! Donte corrected Waynell.It was Waynell's turn to be taken by surprise. This kid could be a lot of fun after all!

The nanny seems to have a thing for cooking turkeys- in fact she actually managed to cook one before she left this time.I wonder if she knew- but how could she have known- no, it's not possible: Waynell's becoming a teenager tonight!

Before Waynell went upstairs to her party, she felt entitled to collect her birthday-simoleons.Between the two trees in the house, she scored about $80.That's a lot of beanie-weenies and graham crackers!

* * * And here is where I must leave you, my delightfuly cultured readers! * * *BUT A full tour of Freshnfruity Memorial Cemetery is also due out, and a finer place to retire there never was! Otherwise, come along next time to see a birthday party, and discover the result of the pregnancy!What horrific names will the spawn be saddled with? You can only tune in to find out!