Ferguson: This WeekendFerguson: This WeekendOctober 9-October 14October 9-October 14

20142014

Through the eyes of a Through the eyes of a Meadville, PA mom, Meadville, PA mom,

Catherine, a peaceful Catherine, a peaceful protester protester

““Be the change you wish Be the change you wish to see in the world.”to see in the world.”

Mahatma Gandhi Mahatma Gandhi

October 9October 9thth…Thursday…Thursday So I am heading out to Ferguson for the big demonstrations and So I am heading out to Ferguson for the big demonstrations and

events this weekend. 24 hours ago, this was hardly on my radar. A events this weekend. 24 hours ago, this was hardly on my radar. A glimmer of an idea turned into hell yeah, why not at a whirlwind glimmer of an idea turned into hell yeah, why not at a whirlwind pace. Been itching to go since the first day. Am glad that I waited, pace. Been itching to go since the first day. Am glad that I waited, because this is a better time for it. Going to be doing some because this is a better time for it. Going to be doing some volunteering, some learning, and some screaming. In no particular volunteering, some learning, and some screaming. In no particular order. My hope is that everyone stays safe, that the movement order. My hope is that everyone stays safe, that the movement continues to gain momentum, and that I can bring home some ideas continues to gain momentum, and that I can bring home some ideas and inspiration that I can use to tackle some of the nasty crap in my and inspiration that I can use to tackle some of the nasty crap in my own community. If you pray, or cast spells, or send energy, or own community. If you pray, or cast spells, or send energy, or poopoo all such ideas, do any and all of them for me and for all of poopoo all such ideas, do any and all of them for me and for all of the protesters please. Never have done anything like this in my the protesters please. Never have done anything like this in my whole life, because frankly there has never been anything like this to whole life, because frankly there has never been anything like this to do. But I am excited and terrified and sad and exhilarated on do. But I am excited and terrified and sad and exhilarated on alternating minutes. (I'm your crazy friend remember). So many of alternating minutes. (I'm your crazy friend remember). So many of you have already reached out with unwavering support in what you have already reached out with unwavering support in what seems like a rather impulsive idea. Not really impulsive. I have been seems like a rather impulsive idea. Not really impulsive. I have been entranced by the ferguson community from August 9th forward to 60 entranced by the ferguson community from August 9th forward to 60 days later. And as I always say, the universe seems to hand me what days later. And as I always say, the universe seems to hand me what I need when I need it. In this case it was a way to get there and a I need when I need it. In this case it was a way to get there and a nudge from an otherwise good influence. nudge from an otherwise good influence. 

So, I will probably be mostly tweeting about my So, I will probably be mostly tweeting about my adventures, but might post here occasionally. I adventures, but might post here occasionally. I will say that I will take pics, but I don't do selfies, will say that I will take pics, but I don't do selfies, and am notoriously bad at remembering to take and am notoriously bad at remembering to take snaps. We'll let that one sort itself out. I posted snaps. We'll let that one sort itself out. I posted the other day about whittling down my friends the other day about whittling down my friends list, and now I know why I did. Because for the list, and now I know why I did. Because for the most part the people reading this post most part the people reading this post understand me to some extent even if they don't understand me to some extent even if they don't always agree with me on political, social, or always agree with me on political, social, or religious issues. I choose people with whom I can religious issues. I choose people with whom I can agree to disagree. And if I get arrested, I'll post agree to disagree. And if I get arrested, I'll post the link to the jail fund page.  Love and Light my the link to the jail fund page.  Love and Light my friends.friends.

Ferguson OctoberFerguson October

http://fergusonoctober.com/about/

I post feeds from ferguson, but I post feeds from ferguson, but seriously look at this right now. seriously look at this right now. These young people are pleading These young people are pleading with police "stop killing us". They are with police "stop killing us". They are raw and powerful. raw and powerful.

Live streams from FergusonLive streams from Ferguson http://www.argusnewsnow.com/page/liv

estreams-from-ferguson/115.html

Pastor CarmenPastor Carmen

Hoping to add light, and not heat, to Hoping to add light, and not heat, to Ferguson, MO. Jim is holding down Ferguson, MO. Jim is holding down the fort on "livestock duty" the fort on "livestock duty" as Catherine and I head into this as Catherine and I head into this adventure. Thanks for your loving adventure. Thanks for your loving support. I hope it will extend to bail support. I hope it will extend to bail money (just kidding...mostly...). money (just kidding...mostly...).

October 10…FridayOctober 10…Friday Made it with Pastor Carmen to my folk's Made it with Pastor Carmen to my folk's

house in indiana. Just back from the store house in indiana. Just back from the store where the clerk made a 100 error that where the clerk made a 100 error that would have made her drawer short. Carmen would have made her drawer short. Carmen caught it and pointed it out. I thought the caught it and pointed it out. I thought the girl would start crying. She said, "I could girl would start crying. She said, "I could have lost my job". Carmen said, well I'm a have lost my job". Carmen said, well I'm a minister, I am supposed to be honest, and I minister, I am supposed to be honest, and I knew that you would have lost your job. Girl knew that you would have lost your job. Girl said, it does not matter if you are a minister said, it does not matter if you are a minister or not, lots of people would not have done or not, lots of people would not have done that. Proud to be represented by the that. Proud to be represented by the champion of the people. champion of the people.

Here's us At checkout Here's us At checkout with cart of supplies for with cart of supplies for us and For other us and For other volunteers And volunteers And protesters. Carmen protesters. Carmen wanted to document. wanted to document. Now she is in bed and Now she is in bed and the insomniac is sorting the insomniac is sorting and repackaging. She and repackaging. She Bought US Some Good Bought US Some Good Karma For THE Karma For THE weekend. Hitting the weekend. Hitting the road by six. March on road by six. March on st louis at 11.st louis at 11.

So I've connected with a couple of great So I've connected with a couple of great folks on the ground in Ferguson and asked folks on the ground in Ferguson and asked what do you need. At first they did not ask what do you need. At first they did not ask for much, but then figured out we meant it for much, but then figured out we meant it and kind requests were made. So we are and kind requests were made. So we are taking 10 blankets that were buried in my taking 10 blankets that were buried in my linen closet, hats gloves and scarves buried linen closet, hats gloves and scarves buried in my front closet, bread which I will explain in my front closet, bread which I will explain in my next post, and enough snacks and in my next post, and enough snacks and water for 5 volunteers for 3 days. Whew. water for 5 volunteers for 3 days. Whew. Plus I found a site on the webs on what to Plus I found a site on the webs on what to take to a rally. What to do if you get gassed, take to a rally. What to do if you get gassed, etc. So now I get to sort and try to etc. So now I get to sort and try to remember what goes to who.  but I am remember what goes to who.  but I am excited and energized that for a couple of excited and energized that for a couple of days I can help alleviate the burden of these days I can help alleviate the burden of these two folks who have been rinsing tear gas out two folks who have been rinsing tear gas out of eyes and giving hot chocolate to, and of eyes and giving hot chocolate to, and hugging people for 62 days. I hope there are hugging people for 62 days. I hope there are throngs of others with car loads doing the throngs of others with car loads doing the same. Last night the cops broke out the riot same. Last night the cops broke out the riot gear and pepper spray. In what I can only gear and pepper spray. In what I can only assume was an intimidation message to assume was an intimidation message to keep us outsiders away. Not this girl. Made keep us outsiders away. Not this girl. Made me want to pack up and leave last night. me want to pack up and leave last night. Tired of feeling like I am going to the same Tired of feeling like I am going to the same fight fought by brave people 55 years ago. fight fought by brave people 55 years ago. It's asinine. It's asinine.

So. Here's the car as we were leaving town. So. Here's the car as we were leaving town. This was before shopping in indiana. Notice This was before shopping in indiana. Notice the 12 dozen bags of sub rolls and buns so the 12 dozen bags of sub rolls and buns so generously donated by the folks at Creative generously donated by the folks at Creative Crust in meadville. I used to make my own Crust in meadville. I used to make my own bread but they are better at it so we go there bread but they are better at it so we go there some. Anyway when one of my new ferguson some. Anyway when one of my new ferguson friends who runs a co-op, home schools her friends who runs a co-op, home schools her kid and has opened her home and heart for kid and has opened her home and heart for supporters coming into town who need to supporters coming into town who need to couch surf (we may be soulmates)  said that couch surf (we may be soulmates)  said that they could use stuff for Sammiches to feed they could use stuff for Sammiches to feed hungry protesters I had an epiphany. I hungry protesters I had an epiphany. I thought that the owners of the creative crust thought that the owners of the creative crust looked like folks who may have done some looked like folks who may have done some protesting themselves back in the day and I protesting themselves back in the day and I shot an email. It was promptly answered and shot an email. It was promptly answered and no questions asked. Just yup we'll get some no questions asked. Just yup we'll get some stuff together for ya. So it was our last stop stuff together for ya. So it was our last stop on the way out of town. I was moved by how on the way out of town. I was moved by how much they sent with us and the fact that if much they sent with us and the fact that if we had room they would have sent more. we had room they would have sent more. They helped us load it (cram it) in and went They helped us load it (cram it) in and went inside. Then the owner ran back out with a inside. Then the owner ran back out with a stuffed grocery size bag and said stuffed grocery size bag and said here...these are oatmeal pecan bars for here...these are oatmeal pecan bars for something sweet. And I thought that was something sweet. And I thought that was something sweet. So I beg you meadville something sweet. So I beg you meadville friends this weekend go buy a loaf or a coffee friends this weekend go buy a loaf or a coffee or a slice of their pizza and when ring you up or a slice of their pizza and when ring you up say I'm supporting you because of your say I'm supporting you because of your support of ferguson. Tell em cathy sent ya. support of ferguson. Tell em cathy sent ya. Spread the love ya'll Spread the love ya'll

Saturday October 11Saturday October 11

Riding train into st louis for march. Just Riding train into st louis for march. Just hit ferguson. Whew. Thought We'd hit ferguson. Whew. Thought We'd Never get here Never get here

Notes… that we are Notes… that we are tucking into snacks tucking into snacks each day for each day for volunteers. volunteers.

Of course I did not sleep last night. It's gettin real. Making Of course I did not sleep last night. It's gettin real. Making

posters at 5 am. I'm no artistposters at 5 am. I'm no artist

Saturday AfternoonSaturday Afternoon

Heading back to ferguson. Going to a Heading back to ferguson. Going to a potluck conversation on race class potluck conversation on race class and privilege. Excited to go deep and privilege. Excited to go deep with new friends with new friends

Saturday, 6:28 p.m.Saturday, 6:28 p.m.

Mostly at this point trying to Mostly at this point trying to remember to breathe. Wow remember to breathe. Wow

I'm fine. Just really overwhelming to I'm fine. Just really overwhelming to finally be here. The pain is palpable. finally be here. The pain is palpable. The anger and outrage are like living The anger and outrage are like living things. It's deep things. It's deep

I was just explaining to Carmen that something I was just explaining to Carmen that something feels different on my facebook feed in that last feels different on my facebook feed in that last two days. I have been engaged in this story for a two days. I have been engaged in this story for a long time, and it has often felt like no one else long time, and it has often felt like no one else knew what was going on, and I feel like now knew what was going on, and I feel like now people are engaging a bit more. Not sure why I people are engaging a bit more. Not sure why I think that is except that maybe because I have think that is except that maybe because I have gone from observer to participant, more people gone from observer to participant, more people can identify. But whatever it is, I am just glad can identify. But whatever it is, I am just glad because it is impossible to not feel the tension of because it is impossible to not feel the tension of being in this community. It's hard to explain. being in this community. It's hard to explain. When we would go to Maine when I was a kid, I When we would go to Maine when I was a kid, I had this camera and would snap all these photos had this camera and would snap all these photos and would be so disappointed that the photo and would be so disappointed that the photo never captured the beauty the way I wanted it to. I never captured the beauty the way I wanted it to. I feel that way about truly being able to convey the feel that way about truly being able to convey the undercurrents here. But I am glad to share the undercurrents here. But I am glad to share the story, and I welcome you sharing my sharing of story, and I welcome you sharing my sharing of the story because it is one that needs to be heard. the story because it is one that needs to be heard.

From CarmenFrom Carmen

I was wondering, on the trip to Ferguson, I was wondering, on the trip to Ferguson, MO, about the worst thing that could MO, about the worst thing that could happen....if either Catherine or I were happen....if either Catherine or I were hurt that would be the worst...but right hurt that would be the worst...but right beside that would have been coming beside that would have been coming back without being changed by the back without being changed by the experience...after our first day here I experience...after our first day here I can scratch the second worry off my can scratch the second worry off my list. list.

Late Saturday NightLate Saturday NightShared food with a bunch of strangers today and talked about Shared food with a bunch of strangers today and talked about

uncomfortable things like race and class and privilege. And I am sure that uncomfortable things like race and class and privilege. And I am sure that we did not do it perfectly, but it felt kind of perfect because no one was we did not do it perfectly, but it felt kind of perfect because no one was afraid to express confusion and discomfort around discussing those afraid to express confusion and discomfort around discussing those issues. I spent two hours at a table full of folks who all live here, black and issues. I spent two hours at a table full of folks who all live here, black and white. I was the only out of towner. They were all amazed that we white. I was the only out of towner. They were all amazed that we travelled so far and as carmen told the one fella, we just couldn't not travelled so far and as carmen told the one fella, we just couldn't not come. I found myself explaining why I needed to be here, and I tried to list come. I found myself explaining why I needed to be here, and I tried to list all of the young men who have died in the last three months at the hands all of the young men who have died in the last three months at the hands of police, and I started getting their names and their stories mixed up, or I of police, and I started getting their names and their stories mixed up, or I was forgetting their names. Because there are so many, and I just was forgetting their names. Because there are so many, and I just couldn't speak the pain that I felt and the anger that there are so many couldn't speak the pain that I felt and the anger that there are so many bodies piling up that I cannot keep them straight. And all of these people bodies piling up that I cannot keep them straight. And all of these people did not judge, but acknowledged that pain because they are living it every did not judge, but acknowledged that pain because they are living it every single day. It is humbling to have people try to comfort your raw emotion single day. It is humbling to have people try to comfort your raw emotion when theirs is so much more raw and so uninterrupted. It was beautiful. when theirs is so much more raw and so uninterrupted. It was beautiful. The young man at my table was disappointed when the wine bottle was The young man at my table was disappointed when the wine bottle was empty, and I said, we have a whole box in the car. But when we got to the empty, and I said, we have a whole box in the car. But when we got to the car I said you seem more like a beer man. And he said, "that I am". So I car I said you seem more like a beer man. And he said, "that I am". So I gave him the rest of my six pack, and sent him back to "ground zero". His gave him the rest of my six pack, and sent him back to "ground zero". His words not mine. The place of the shooting which is where he lives. And I'll words not mine. The place of the shooting which is where he lives. And I'll probably never see him again in this lifetime, but I'll remember how probably never see him again in this lifetime, but I'll remember how quietly he sat until the very end, and how I could feel his rage bubbling quietly he sat until the very end, and how I could feel his rage bubbling under the surface until he finally explained what it was like to live in fear under the surface until he finally explained what it was like to live in fear every day that you might not make it home that night. And that sounds every day that you might not make it home that night. And that sounds like a very dramatic way to look at life, but what do I know, I don't live like a very dramatic way to look at life, but what do I know, I don't live that. I just wish that we could all start to have real conversations with that. I just wish that we could all start to have real conversations with each other about shit that matters, and not just about the safe and the each other about shit that matters, and not just about the safe and the easy. Been an emotional day. easy. Been an emotional day.

I am just an observer. I need to bear I am just an observer. I need to bear witness to these things because we witness to these things because we cannot keep blissfully believing that cannot keep blissfully believing that it does not happen. This is so real. it does not happen. This is so real.

Wish I could squish my boy tonight. Wish I could squish my boy tonight. He always reminds me why I care He always reminds me why I care about the way things are in the about the way things are in the world. Because every action or world. Because every action or inaction I take is shaping the reality inaction I take is shaping the reality he will face in the future he will face in the future

Gotta sleep now. Body going on Gotta sleep now. Body going on strike. Night all. Going to worship strike. Night all. Going to worship with the community tomorrow. with the community tomorrow.

Sunday MorningSunday Morning Quietly resolute this cold drizzly morning in Quietly resolute this cold drizzly morning in

Ferguson. Woke up twice last night dreaming of Ferguson. Woke up twice last night dreaming of protests and arrests in Ferguson only to wake up protests and arrests in Ferguson only to wake up this morning to find out that is what had this morning to find out that is what had happened. Last night Carmen and I ate at a happened. Last night Carmen and I ate at a mexican restaurant on S. Florissant. Unbeknownst mexican restaurant on S. Florissant. Unbeknownst to us, we were about a block from the police to us, we were about a block from the police station. As we left out the back door, we noticed station. As we left out the back door, we noticed to cop cars cruising a parking lot behind where to cop cars cruising a parking lot behind where we were. There was something strange about we were. There was something strange about their actions and we both took pause to watch. their actions and we both took pause to watch. They were driving police vehicles, but were They were driving police vehicles, but were stopping at civilian vehicles and looking around stopping at civilian vehicles and looking around and then transferring items from the unmarked and then transferring items from the unmarked vehicles to the cop cars. It just did not feel right.vehicles to the cop cars. It just did not feel right.

Feeling pretty confident this morning Feeling pretty confident this morning that we were looking directly at that we were looking directly at staging activities (ie getting riot gear staging activities (ie getting riot gear from their vehicles) and that we just from their vehicles) and that we just did not realize what we were seeing. did not realize what we were seeing. It fits the timeline.It fits the timeline.

Thinking of what to wear this morning and Thinking of what to wear this morning and wondering what would look best in a mug shot. That wondering what would look best in a mug shot. That seems dark I suppose, but is how I am feeling seems dark I suppose, but is how I am feeling today. There is something about the witness of today. There is something about the witness of blatant and repeated injustice that makes me ready blatant and repeated injustice that makes me ready to dig in today. We are starting the day with an to dig in today. We are starting the day with an interfaith worship service in St. Louis that I think will interfaith worship service in St. Louis that I think will be powerful and moving. Then there will be a few be powerful and moving. Then there will be a few hours in between that Carmen and I are hoping to hours in between that Carmen and I are hoping to use to just mill around and to make some use to just mill around and to make some connections with people. I have my notebook and connections with people. I have my notebook and my camera, and I want to collect stories. I don't my camera, and I want to collect stories. I don't really need to ask, I can read it in faces. You can really need to ask, I can read it in faces. You can see the people who have been in the streets every see the people who have been in the streets every night vs. the ones who are just joining the fight. The night vs. the ones who are just joining the fight. The veterans do not in anyway seem defeated, they just veterans do not in anyway seem defeated, they just seem determined. Newer faces have and indignant seem determined. Newer faces have and indignant anger that is probably common, but those who have anger that is probably common, but those who have been out here know that there are no rules, no been out here know that there are no rules, no laws. They are maced and gassed if they don't laws. They are maced and gassed if they don't peacefully protest, and maced and gassed if they peacefully protest, and maced and gassed if they do peacefully protest.do peacefully protest.

I am of two minds about this. If they I am of two minds about this. If they are going to arrest for sitting doing are going to arrest for sitting doing nothing, then why bother behaving. nothing, then why bother behaving. Might as well go down swinging Might as well go down swinging right? The outcome is always the right? The outcome is always the same. "We have all of the power, you same. "We have all of the power, you have none of the power. We are have none of the power. We are accountable to no one, we are accountable to no one, we are untouchable. You know this and we untouchable. You know this and we know this." How would you respond?know this." How would you respond?

It's funny, I am fully a pacifist, and don't It's funny, I am fully a pacifist, and don't imagine that I'll be doing any fighting, but it imagine that I'll be doing any fighting, but it is easy to see when you are here why taking is easy to see when you are here why taking the high road just isn't enough anymore. the high road just isn't enough anymore. And it's an age old debate. It was contested And it's an age old debate. It was contested during the civil rights movement between during the civil rights movement between Malcolm and MLK. I think that civil Malcolm and MLK. I think that civil disobedience can take many forms and that disobedience can take many forms and that always turning the other cheek can always turning the other cheek can sometimes feel like giving up your power. I sometimes feel like giving up your power. I am not suggesting that people should burn am not suggesting that people should burn the place down. But neither am I suggesting the place down. But neither am I suggesting that they should just quietly go into the that they should just quietly go into the night. I think that there is a balance. When night. I think that there is a balance. When mace, and pepper spray and tear gas enter mace, and pepper spray and tear gas enter the fight, it may be time to take some of that the fight, it may be time to take some of that power back. power back.

““Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.” hate: only love can do that.”

~~Martin Luther King, Jr.Martin Luther King, Jr.

SundaySundayOur very first interaction yesterday when we got to ferguson was Our very first interaction yesterday when we got to ferguson was at the metrolink station. We bought weekly passes because it at the metrolink station. We bought weekly passes because it seemed more cost effective, and we can just pass them on to seemed more cost effective, and we can just pass them on to someone who can use them before we leave. But we could not someone who can use them before we leave. But we could not make sense of the lines, so I found a young man standing who make sense of the lines, so I found a young man standing who looked like he knew how to help two clueless out of towners. He looked like he knew how to help two clueless out of towners. He seemed a bit wary when first I approached but answered my seemed a bit wary when first I approached but answered my question. Carmen then told him she liked his backpack which question. Carmen then told him she liked his backpack which began a 20 minute conversation with him. He was a psychology began a 20 minute conversation with him. He was a psychology student, and told us about where he had lived and mentioned a student, and told us about where he had lived and mentioned a couple of times proudly that he does music. He then got in his couple of times proudly that he does music. He then got in his backpack and showed us a book he is writing about his experience backpack and showed us a book he is writing about his experience with foster care. I took mental note of his name so that I could with foster care. I took mental note of his name so that I could purchase a copy when it comes out. Then the train came and we purchase a copy when it comes out. Then the train came and we parted ways. About five minutes into the train ride, he came parted ways. About five minutes into the train ride, he came behind me and said excuse me miss, I thought you might like to behind me and said excuse me miss, I thought you might like to see my youtube video, and showed me the title that I could find it see my youtube video, and showed me the title that I could find it under. Of course, I am a dummy and now I cannot find it, but it under. Of course, I am a dummy and now I cannot find it, but it was a nice interaction. He seemed hungry to tell his story, to was a nice interaction. He seemed hungry to tell his story, to connect. And I can identify with that. I make quick decisions about connect. And I can identify with that. I make quick decisions about people and have learned to trust my gut instincts, and I am usually people and have learned to trust my gut instincts, and I am usually right. I really liked him, and part of the pain of being here is getting right. I really liked him, and part of the pain of being here is getting to talk to people with stories to tell and then to have to leave to talk to people with stories to tell and then to have to leave them. If I was only having to think of myself, not of my family, it them. If I was only having to think of myself, not of my family, it would awfully easy to talk myself into finding an apartment and would awfully easy to talk myself into finding an apartment and staying with this struggle. And I would not be the only one. staying with this struggle. And I would not be the only one.

Packed to head out for another day in Packed to head out for another day in st. Louis. Planning on being out at st. Louis. Planning on being out at night tonight as well. Made sure we night tonight as well. Made sure we had all the suggested "gear". Goggles, had all the suggested "gear". Goggles, masks, handkerchiefs, eye washes, masks, handkerchiefs, eye washes, extra clothes, on and on. Why does it extra clothes, on and on. Why does it feel like we are packing to go to war I feel like we are packing to go to war I wonder aloud. Because we are carmen wonder aloud. Because we are carmen responds. It's a somber morning responds. It's a somber morning

Mass Meeting: An Interfaith ServiceMass Meeting: An Interfaith ServiceOctober 12 @ 7:00 pm - 10:00 pmOctober 12 @ 7:00 pm - 10:00 pm

I think that everyone needs to keep their eyes and ears I think that everyone needs to keep their eyes and ears open after this event closes. Because I think that people open after this event closes. Because I think that people are going to be energized and motivated to make their are going to be energized and motivated to make their voices heard after this. My heart is bursting with voices heard after this. My heart is bursting with excitement on being able to experience this meeting. excitement on being able to experience this meeting.

Did not occur to me to go to Mike browns Did not occur to me to go to Mike browns memorial on Canfield till it was mentioned in memorial on Canfield till it was mentioned in service today. So we are on train heading service today. So we are on train heading back to ferguson and then going to canfield. back to ferguson and then going to canfield. Trying to mentally prepare for that now. Trying to mentally prepare for that now.

Sort of tragic to Sort of tragic to think that I could think that I could choose three choose three different locations different locations to see where three to see where three different young different young men have been men have been shot and killed by shot and killed by police in the past 2 police in the past 2 months months

“ “Not sure what part of my brain I thought could prepare for this. I Not sure what part of my brain I thought could prepare for this. I refuse to live in a society where this reality is acceptable. This is refuse to live in a society where this reality is acceptable. This is a peaceful feeling neighborhood, only I'm guessing their sense of a peaceful feeling neighborhood, only I'm guessing their sense of

peace has been shattered.”peace has been shattered.”

Sit-In at QuikTrip Gas Station in St. Louis Ends in 17 Arrests, Police Firing Pepper Spray

By: By: Kevin Gosztola Sunday October 12, 2014 3:58 pm Sunday October 12, 2014 3:58 pm

Seeing [my son] in so many innocent Seeing [my son] in so many innocent faces here. Wondering if you love faces here. Wondering if you love your babies harder when you know your babies harder when you know they are in perpetual danger. they are in perpetual danger.

I don't know how I manage to be so I don't know how I manage to be so fortunate today, but every time I have felt fortunate today, but every time I have felt depleted and like what am I doing here, I end up depleted and like what am I doing here, I end up in conversation with someone who puts things in in conversation with someone who puts things in perspective and infuses me with energy.perspective and infuses me with energy.

Case in point. Had to wait in line for this event Case in point. Had to wait in line for this event and had convo with young woman who expressed and had convo with young woman who expressed gratitude for all of the folks coming from across gratitude for all of the folks coming from across the country to be here. Her feeling is that it is the country to be here. Her feeling is that it is injecting energy into the movement right when it injecting energy into the movement right when it was needed. That is exactly what I was hoping was needed. That is exactly what I was hoping for. She also verified another hunch I have had for. She also verified another hunch I have had about how much the community when the grand about how much the community when the grand jury decision comes down. I have not talked to jury decision comes down. I have not talked to one person who thinks Darren Wilson will be one person who thinks Darren Wilson will be indicted. January 7 is the deadline.indicted. January 7 is the deadline.

So many beautiful So many beautiful faces here waiting faces here waiting to hear Dr cornel to hear Dr cornel west west

You should hear the You should hear the powerful voices powerful voices leading up to. I leading up to. I hope they are hope they are recording. Getting recording. Getting ready for Hedy ready for Hedy Epstein Epstein

It's like an old fashioned revival It's like an old fashioned revival meeting in this space tonight meeting in this space tonight

Commitment from faith leaders to Commitment from faith leaders to get out of the pulpit and into the get out of the pulpit and into the streets. streets.

Just got real in this building Just got real in this building The young people taking over the The young people taking over the

stage stage Totally demanded that their voices Totally demanded that their voices

be heard. This is what democracy be heard. This is what democracy looks like looks like

I could marinate in the passion and I could marinate in the passion and energy in this room forever. energy in this room forever.

An hour later…An hour later…

All right kids. Dead battery. All right kids. Dead battery. Takin this party to the streets. Peace Takin this party to the streets. Peace

Seems police are boxing in. Seems police are boxing in. Posted in every direction I could see Posted in every direction I could see Three hours later…Where folks are Three hours later…Where folks are

gathering, no police. Odd gathering, no police. Odd

Should not be a Should not be a thing where I can thing where I can witness ground witness ground zero for two dead zero for two dead teens in less than teens in less than 10 hours 10 hours

Off to the last planned action that we'll be Off to the last planned action that we'll be participating in before we leave. Seems our participating in before we leave. Seems our trip here has raised a little more awareness trip here has raised a little more awareness for some of my friends. Do not make the for some of my friends. Do not make the mistake of thinking that my return home mistake of thinking that my return home means this is over. If you are just now means this is over. If you are just now joining, this was never about me. This has joining, this was never about me. This has been a hard fought battle for 63 days been a hard fought battle for 63 days before I arrived and will be a hard fought before I arrived and will be a hard fought battle next week, next month, next year. battle next week, next month, next year. The struggle continues."If they don't give us The struggle continues."If they don't give us what we want...SHUT IT DOWN"what we want...SHUT IT DOWN"

Monday Morning, October 13Monday Morning, October 13

Monday Morning, October 13Monday Morning, October 13

Now they are arresting clergy in Ferguson...happening now...

http://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/live-video-michael-brown-shooting-protests-st-louis-11a-et-n224596

I generally advise against watching mainstream media if you want any sort of truth… But if you look for a livestream, you can watch events as they unfold today. 

Sitting across from Sitting across from jail/police station jail/police station now now

The scene of the The scene of the crime. Ferguson crime. Ferguson pd. pd.

Clergy being called Clergy being called to confront cops to confront cops with these words. with these words. "You are part of a "You are part of a system that caused system that caused the death of Mike the death of Mike brown. I call on you brown. I call on you to repent and am to repent and am ready to hear your ready to hear your confession" confession"

Gonna be pretty Gonna be pretty powerful. I'm powerful. I'm gonna try to gonna try to capture. capture.

They just asked clergy who are willing to risk They just asked clergy who are willing to risk arrest to stand. Guess who was one of them? So arrest to stand. Guess who was one of them? So with that in mind, I am gonna try to hang back with that in mind, I am gonna try to hang back and document and avoid it if possible. I have a and document and avoid it if possible. I have a PayPal acct that I should be able to use if needed PayPal acct that I should be able to use if needed in a worst case. Hopefully none of that happens in a worst case. Hopefully none of that happens but the st louis pd behave badly. Charging for a but the st louis pd behave badly. Charging for a few minutes and then headed out. I have my few minutes and then headed out. I have my counter riot control supplies, which are totally counter riot control supplies, which are totally heavy. And it's raining a lot. 75 clergy stood as heavy. And it's raining a lot. 75 clergy stood as those willing to go to jail. Roll out! those willing to go to jail. Roll out!

Over 1000 here by Over 1000 here by my estimate. my estimate. Singing This Little Singing This Little Light Of mine Light Of mine

Marching, Marching, chanting, hands in chanting, hands in air. Just saw first k9 air. Just saw first k9 unit unit

Just heard Just heard arrestable move arrestable move forward, others fill forward, others fill in. Here we go. in. Here we go.

So many people. So many people. So organized and So organized and peaceful. peaceful. Confronting police Confronting police now. Reading now. Reading names of 300 names of 300 murdered this murdered this year. year.

[Pastor Carmen] is up front riot police just [Pastor Carmen] is up front riot police just got here got here

I stepped away from action for a bit. It's I stepped away from action for a bit. It's pouring. Police just keep coming. Singing, pouring. Police just keep coming. Singing, chanting. Facing off with cops. Be safe chanting. Facing off with cops. Be safe [Carmen]. See you soon [Carmen]. See you soon

Laying low in case the good Rev gets Laying low in case the good Rev gets arrested. Pd seems geared up for it. I was arrested. Pd seems geared up for it. I was there for most of it. Started pouring and I there for most of it. Started pouring and I wanted to update some. Under awning wanted to update some. Under awning down street down street

Looks like arrests have started. The front Looks like arrests have started. The front line is moving. line is moving.

Cops facing off Cops facing off with clergy, oh and with clergy, oh and check that roof check that roof

It is pouring! On good note tough to It is pouring! On good note tough to use tear gas. use tear gas.

Justice is raining down like water, Justice is raining down like water, and righteousness like a mighty and righteousness like a mighty stream! stream!

Goosebumps Goosebumps I've not seen it rain this hard for this I've not seen it rain this hard for this

long in years. long in years.

Police line do not cross or whatever Police line do not cross or whatever

Arrests have apparently started. I'm Arrests have apparently started. I'm back at church to see if help needed back at church to see if help needed here. Dr Cornel West was one of here. Dr Cornel West was one of those arrested. Speaker last night, those arrested. Speaker last night, protester today. No word on carmen protester today. No word on carmen

Heading back down to pd to see Heading back down to pd to see what I can find out. what I can find out.

Looks like the Looks like the whole contingent is whole contingent is headed back headed back

Laid eyes on Laid eyes on Carmen Emerson Carmen Emerson she seems well she seems well

Soggy carmen Soggy carmen back from battle back from battle

After the protestAfter the protest

30 were arrested but they called off 30 were arrested but they called off protest before [the pastor] got protest before [the pastor] got hauled in hauled in

Heading home Heading home MondayMonday

Eating well Eating well deserved lunch then deserved lunch then hitting the road hitting the road

View on leaving View on leaving town. These folks in town. These folks in full riot gear still full riot gear still lined up facing off lined up facing off about 40 protesters about 40 protesters across the street. across the street. Wonder what that's Wonder what that's all about. all about.

Goodbye ferguson Goodbye ferguson and all of the beautiful and all of the beautiful people I met and people I met and ate/connected/protestate/connected/protested with and loved. My ed with and loved. My life is forever life is forever changed. I'll keep changed. I'll keep fighting from afar. fighting from afar. And I WILL be back And I WILL be back and I WILL bring and I WILL bring others. others.

“ “I move forward in my life every day, I move forward in my life every day, even if it's only a tiny step, even if it's only a tiny step, because I know that great things are because I know that great things are accomplished with tiny moves, accomplished with tiny moves, but nothing is accomplished by but nothing is accomplished by standing still.”standing still.”

~~Zig ZiglarZig Ziglar