Family Life - New

7/29/2019 Family Life - New

1/16

FAMILY LIFE

MEMO TO BACHELORS

ALAN (unmarried): They say that you dont know what happiness is until youget married.

MR. STONE (married for 20 years): Yes, and then its too late.

memo to bachelors aviz burlacilorthey say that se zice c

MATRIMONIAL

TEACHER: What is the meaning of the word matrimony?WILLIE: Father says it isnt a word, its a sentence.

sentence (aici) condamnare

PERPLEXITY

What does your wife say when you come home so late?Im not married.

Then why do you go home so late?

A FIRM DECISION

SUITOR: I want to marry your daughter.FATHER: Have you seen my wife?SUITOR: Yes, but I still prefer your daughter.

1


2/16

A CHANGE FOR THE BETTER

SUITOR: I was going to marry your daughter but I found out how much she wasspending on clothes.

FATHER: Yes ?SUITOR: Now I am going to marry her dressmaker.

a change for the better o schimbare n bine

HE EASED HER MIND

MISS. BLANKS: No, Mr. Hanks. I am sorry but I cannot marry you. I could neverlove a man with red hair.

MR. HANKS: On that point I can ease your mind. My barber tells me that myhair if falling out and I shall be completely bald in one year.

to ease somebodys mind a liniti pe cineva

THATS ANOTHER CUP OF TEA !

Do you love me? whispered the girl to her boyfriend.

Of course I do, he whispered back.Will you marry me then? she asked.Lets not change the subject, ha said.

thats another cup of tea asta este alt poveste

BOTH MISTAKEN

MARY: So you and David are married! I thought it was a mere flirtation.BARBARA: So did David, but you were both mistaken..

both mistaken amndoi s-au nelata mere flirtation un simplu flirt so did David aa a crezut i David

FRIDAY CANNOT BE AN EXCEPTION

2


3/16

ARTHUR: Do you believe it is unlucky to marry on a Friday, Mr. Simpson?MR. SIMPSON: Certainly I do. Why should you want Friday to be an exception?

IT SOUNDS REVOLTING !

At the end of the polar night an Eskimo bride was talking to her friend, abouther bridegroom:

"Im so furious," she complained. "Last night he didnt come home till halfpast January, and it was our wedding night"

wedding night noaptea nuntii

AN UNEXPECTED TURN

SUITOR (proudly): Im making enough to support twowomen like you.

HIS CHARMER: Well, then well have my mother to live with us.

an unexpected turn o ntorstur neateptatIm making enough ctig destul

SO FAR SO GOOD

SHE: Now that we are married, I will share all your troubles and sorrows.HE: But, darling, I havent got any troubles and sorrows.SHE: Well, weve just married.

so far so good pn acum totul a fost bine

weve just married de-abia ne-am cstorit

LOVE AND MARRIAGE

WIFE: It is said that love is the wine of life. What do you think of it darling?HUSBAND: Well, if it is so, then the marriage is the morning after.

TIME WORKS GREAT CHANGES

3


4/16

FRIEND: How does married life agree with you?HUSBAND: During the first week, I talked and she listened. Then, during a

fortnight, she talked and I listened. Now we both talk and the neighbours listen.

time works great changes timpul schimb multehow does married life agree with you? Cum te mpaci cu viaa de familie?

CAUGHT IN A TRAP

It was their first quarrel, and he told her he was sorry he had married her.Well, retorted his wife, you cant say that I ran after you.No, he answered. And the trap doesnt run after the mouse, but it catches it,

just the same.

just the same in ciuda acestui fapt

AN ALTRUIST FALLOW

SHE (reproachful): Perhaps, you would have preferred me to marry someoneelse, eh?HE: God forbid! Ive never wished anybody ill.

someone else altcinevaGod forbid! Doamne ferete!Ive never wished anybody ill n-am dorit niciodat rul nimnui

IT SERVES HIM RIGHT !

SHE: Have you heard the latest news? Victor got married yesterday.

HE: Good, I never liked the fellow.

it serves him right! aa i trebuie!the latest news ultima tireto get married a se cstori

A NICE FAMILY TALK

4


5/16

WIFE: If you tell a man anything it goes in one ear and out of the other.HUSBAND: And if you tell a woman anything, it goes in at both ears and out of

her month.

to go in at one ear and out of the other a-i intra pe o ureche i a-i iei pe

cealalt

DOUBLE TROUBLE

Mrs. Gibbs doesnt enjoy playing golf with her husband.Shes talking to a friend at the golf club.

FRIEND: Why dont you like playing with him? Whats theproblem?

MRS. GIBBS: Well, the trouble is, he cheats.FRIEND: How unfair! Why dont you tell him to stop

cheating?MRS. GIBBS: Well, the problem is, I cheat too. You see, I beat

him because I cheat better than he does.

MOTHER-TONGUE

WILLIE: Papa, why do they call our language mother-tongue?FATHER: Well, just see who uses it most.

mother-tongue limb maternwhy do they call? de ca se numete?who uses it most cine o folosete mai mult

NEVER TRUST HEREDITY

HUSBAND: I dont believe in heredity any more.WIFE: How long since, you, silly?HUSBAND: Since you told me your mother were dumb.

I dont believe in heredity any more nu mai cred n ereditatehow long since? de cnd?

5


6/16

TOO SOON TO GIVE AN ANSWER

FRIEND: What did your wife say about your being out so late?HUSBAND: Ask me next week shell probably have finished by then.

by then pn atunci

THE ONLY POSSIBLE SUSPECT

MENTAL NURSE: Theres a man on the telephone who wants to know if any ofour patients have escaped recently.

SUPERINTENDENT: What does he want to know that for?MENTAL NURSE: Somebody has run away with his wife.

WRONG WOMAN

POLICE SERGENT: I think weve found your missing wife.MR. STEED: Have you? What does she say?POLICE SERGENT: Nothing.MR. STEED: Thats definitely not my wife.

you missing wife soia dvs. care a disprut

TAKING AT THE GATE

HUSBAND: Who was that you were talking to, for a whole hour at the gate?WIFE: That was Mrs. White. She was in a hurry; she hadnt time to come in.

to be in a hurry a se grbi

A GOOD COOK

YOUNG WIFE: Do you think Im a good cook, darling?HUSBAND: I think you are perfect.YOUNG WIFE: Which of my dishes do you like best?HUSBAND: Tinned sardines, my darling.

to like best a-i plcea cel mai multtinned sardines sardine conservate

6


7/16

MODERN COOKING

WIFE: How do you like the potato salad?HUSBAND (ironically): Its exquisite! I ask for nothing better! Did you buy it

yourself, my dear?

I ask for nothing better nici nu vreau/nici nu-mi trebuieceva mai bun

POOR CAT !

Mister Smith came home one evening and found his young wife sobbing.Whats the matter, darling? he asked anxiously.Amidst the sobs, she explained that the cat had eaten all the cakes she

had made that morning.Never mind, my dear, said Mr. Smith kindly. Ill get you another cat

tomorrow.

amidst sobs printre hohote de plns

HIS FIRST LESSON

I can see you are a married man, now.How.Because you have no button off your coat.Yes thats the first thing my wife did, she taught me how to sew them on.

you have no button off your coat nu-i mai lipsete nici un nasture de

la hain

BACK TO CIVVY STREET

MRS. GREEN: Has life in the Army done your husband any good?MRS. BROWN : Hes a different man, my dear. He sweeps the floor, washes the

dishes, and peels the potatoes without a word.

back to Civvy Street lsat la vatrCivvy Street (glume) viaa civilto wash the dishes a spla vasele

7


8/16

PELTED WITH FLOWERS

FRIEND (amazed): What the deuce! What sight you are!HUSBAND: You see, just as I was going out, my wife pelted me with flowers.FRIEND : But that could not make you so dirty.HUSBAND (embarrassed): Well, as a matter of fact, the flowers came together

with the pots.

pelted with flowers bombardat cu floriWhat the deuce! la naiba!What a sight you are! in ce hal ari!as a matter if fact de fapt

THERES A WOMAN IN IT!

He would have spent his fortune in a year if it hadnt been for his wife.How did she stop him?She spent it herself.

theres a woman in it e o mn de femeie aici, e ofemeie la mijloc

if it handt been for dac n-ar fi fost

A THOUTFUL WIFE

SALLY (all sugar and honey): Darling, weve been married exactly a monthtoday, so Ive bought you a beautiful surprise.

GEORGE (touched): How thoughtful of you, sweetheart. I cant wait to see it.SALLY: Just a minute then, and Ill put it on.

all sugar and honey foarte mierosI cant wait de-abia atept

ECONOMY AND STINGINESS

SON: I say, daddy, what is the difference between economy and stinginess?

8


9/16

FATHER: Thats quite simple, son. If I cut down the expenses for my privateneeds, that is economy. If I cut them down for your mothers dresses that isstinginess.

I say ascultto cut down the expenses a reduce cheltuielile

THE MILLINERS BILL

WIFE: I want to see this letter.HUSBAND (puzzled): What letter?WIFE: That one you have just opened. You turned pale when you read it.HUSBAND: Here it is; it is your milliners bill.

to turn pale a se face palid

ITS UP TO YOU

Mr .and Mrs. Chase are in a shop. Mrs. Chase is looking at a very expensivedress. Is she going to buy it? She cant decide.

MRS. CHASE: Shall I buy this one, dear?

MR. CHASE: I dont mind. I am not going to wear it. Its up to you to decide.MRS. CHASE: It isnt up to me, dear. Youre going to pay for it. Its up to you.

its up to you depinde de tine; e treaba ta

EVERY HUSBANDS WORRY

A Scotsman was paying a visit to a friend. They were in the middle of an

interesting conversation, when, suddenly, the Scotsmans friend cried outfrightened:

Look, its raining and my wife has left without taking her umbrella!Dont worry, she will certainly enter a fashion shop or something like that. But thats why Im worrying.

to pay a visit a face o vizitfashion shop cas de mode

9


10/16

A LUCKY CHAP

PETER: Last night my wife dreamt she had married a millionaire.GARY: You are a lucky chap, Peter. My wife imagines the same thing in the

daylight.

in the daylight n timpul zilei

HE CANT AFFORD IT

I wish I knew what to give my wife for her birthday.You may ask her.Ill never do that! I cant afford so much!

I wish I knew a vrea s tiuI cant afford so much nu pot s-mi permit s cheltuiesc

att de mult

PRESENTS FOR CHRISTMAS

FRIEND: What does your wife want for Christmas?

HUSBAND: All she sees!

MONEY, MONEY, MONEY...

WIFE: I say, Steve, I need some money for tomorrow to pay the baby-sitter andthe maid, and

HUSBAND: Hold on, Peggy! I know very well that youvealready received your wages today. Why on earth dont you

use your own money?WIFE: How many times need I tell you that my money is

my money and your money is our money?

hold on sai aa / oprete-te puinwhy on earth? de ce naiba ?

IN ORDER TO BE STRAIGHT

WIFE: Darling, will you give me ten pounds and only give me five of them.HUSBAND: Why that?

10


11/16

WIFE: Because then youll owe me five, and Ill owe you five, and well bestraight.

to be straight a fi chit

THE LONGEST MINUTE

HE: Arent you nearly ready dear?

SHE: I wish you would stop asking me that question, Charley. Ive been tellingyou for the last hour that Ill be ready in a minute.

A GENTLE REMINDER

WIFE: Its one oclock, my darling, I have to try my dress. Ill go there at once,and I shall be back in twenty minutes.

HUSBAND: Dont forget, my dear, that we must be at the theatre before eightoclock.

a gentle reminder o aluzie politicoasat once imediat

AN ECONOMICAL WIFE

MR. JONES: Is your wife economical?MR. STONES: Sometimes. She had

only twenty-six candles on her fortieth birthday cake, last Saturday.

HER ARITHMETIC

WIFE: Have a look, Michael, at the cake I decorated for my birthday party.Dont you think my taste is wonderful?

HUSBAND (counting the candles on the cake): Yes, darling, your taste is reallygreat, but your arithmetic is terrible!

A DOGS LIFE

FRIEND: Your husband says he leads a dogs life.

11


12/16

WIFE: Yes its very much like it. He comes in with dirty feet, makes himselfcomfortable by the fire and waits to be fed.

to lead a dogs life a duce o via de cineto make oneself comfortable a se face comod

A SIGN OF RAIN

HUSBAND (groaning): The rheumatism in my leg is coming again.WIFE (with sympathy): Oh! I am very sorry. I wanted to go shopping today, and

that is a sure sign of rain.

THERES NO HURRY

MRS. BLACK: James, you are about to go to heaven, but I will follow you.MR.BLACK: I suppose so, Mary, but so far as I am concerned you dont need to

be in a hurry.

theres no hurry nu e nici o grabto be about a fi ameninatas far as I am concerned n ceea ce m privete

ALL THE ANGELS FLY

Edith wanted her mother to tell her about angels what were they.An angel, my dear, is a little girl with wings that flies away up in the skies.I understand mummy; but I heard daddy tell the governess the other day, that

she was an angel. Will she really fly one day?Indeed she will, my honey! She will fly away just as soon as she gets her

trunk packed.

ONE BOOK IS ENOUGH

Emma was out for shopping when she met her friend, Jessica.What are looking for? asked Jessica.I dont know exactly. Tomorrow is my husbands birthday and I dont know

what present to buy him, said Emma.Why dont you buy him a tie?

Because I bought him one last year.Buy him a book, then, suggested Jessica.I thought of it myself, replied Emma, but he has got one already.

12


13/16

GENTLEMAN MANNERS

MRS. ELIOT: Does your husband ever quarrel with you?MRS. GRANT: Good gracious, no! He is too much of a gentleman. He just goes

out and slams the door.

to quarrel with somebody a se certa cu cinevagood gracious! Doamne ferete!he is too much of a gentleman e prea domnto slam the door a trnti ua

A CAREFUL HUSBAND

WIFE: You were too late coming home. I heard the clock strike two.HUSBAND: No, darling, it was about to strike eleven, but I stopped it in case it

disturbed you.

A TWIST IN THE DIALOGUE

The following dialogue took place between a married couple on their honeymoon journey.

HE: My dear, are you comfortable in that corner?SHE: Quite, thank you, my dear.HE: Sure theres plenty of room for your feet?SHE: Quite sure.HE: And no cold air from the window, by your ears!SHE: Certainly not, darling.HE: Then, my dear, Ill change places with you.

a twist in the dialogue dialog cu final neateptatplenty of room destul loc

OUT OF PROFESSIONAL HABIT

MR. MOOR: Did your wife scold you when you came home so late, last night?MR. FROST: Not in the least. You dont how it is to have a wife who was once a

schoolteacher. She simply made me write a hundred times: I must be at home by10 oclock. It took me the whole weekend.

13


14/16

not in the least nicidecum, nici gndshe simply made me write m-a pus pur i simplu s scriu

FORTUNE SMILED ON HIM

FRANK: I must be the happiest man in the world. I have the finest mother-in-law in the country.

HUGH: No wonder, youre happy, if shes in the country. My mother-in-lawlives next door.

fortune smiled on him el a avut baft/ lui i-a surs noroculno wonder nu e de mirare

to live next door a locui alturi

BETWEEN SONS-IN-LAW

ROBERT: My mother-in-law is a woman of rare gifts she hasnt givenanyone a present in twenty-five years.

ALBERT: As for me I dont know what Id do without my mother-in-law in thehouse but its nice dreaming about it.

A BROAD HINT

What do you think of the girl who has just sung? Shes my eldest daughter,and she got her voice from me.

Youre lucky to have got rid of it.

a broad hint o aluzie transparent

to get rid of something a scpa de ceva

PATERNAL AND MATERNAL HEREDITY

Last night I was listening to your son, Mr. Taylor: he wasdelivering a political speech. What a splendid voice hes got.

Yes, he got it from me.He was lecturing for more than two hours.He got that from his mother.

to deliver a speech a ine un discurs

14


15/16

ACCUSING EACH OTHER

FATHER(boiling over with rage): Where on earth did that child get her temper?Certainly not from me.

MOTHER(sweetly): You must be right, dear, since you never lose your temper,but always get into it.

to accuse each other a se acuza reciprocto boil over with rage a spumega de furietemper 1 caracter,fire, temperament

2. calm, cumpt3. (acces de) furie, mnie

where did that child get her temper de la cine a motenit copila fireato lose ones temper a-i pierde cumptulto get into temper a se nfuria

A DISTANT RELATIVE

Mr. Brown, are you related to Dr. Brown?Certainly, but it is a distant relationship.

In what way are you related to him?He is my elder brother.And you call that distant! Why?Well, there are eleven brother between us.

to be related to a se nrudi cu

IRISH MOTHER WRITING TO HER SON

Dear Son,

Just a few lines to let you know Im still alive.Im writing this letter slowly because I know that you cannot read fast. You

wont know the house when you come home weve move.About your father he has a new job. He has 500 men under him. He is

cutting grass in the cemetery.Your sister, Mary had a baby this morning. I havent had a chance to find out

whether its a boy or a girl, so I dont know whether youre an Aunt or Uncle.Your Uncle Dick drowned last week in a vat of whisky in the 45 North

Brewery. Some of his workmates dived in to save him but he fought them off

15


16/16

bravely. We cremated his body, and it took 3 days to put out the fire. Peace to hissoul!

I went to the doctor on Thursday and your father came with me. The doctorput a small tube in my mouth and told me to keep it open for 10 minutes. Yourfather offered to buy that tube from the doctor.

It only rained twice last week. First for 3 days and then for 4 days.We had a letter yesterday from the undertaker. He said if the last instalment

wasnt paid on your Grandmother within 7 days, up she comes!

Your loving mother.

P.S. I was going to send you $ !0.00 but I have already sealed the envelope.P.P.S. If you dont receive this letter please write and let me know.

16

Family Life - New

Documents

Transcript of Family Life - New