Effects Of The Foster Care System

8/12/2019 Effects Of The Foster Care System

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Effects of the Foster Care SystemBrian Williamson

1EFFECTS OF THE FOSTER CARE SYSTEM


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There are few things as life-changing as being put into the foster care system. Its a quite

confounding situation for a young mind to process and attempt to make sense of. Thrust into a

complete change of environment, of everything you know, you have little to no control over the

situation. Youre given vague details as to what is happening, so as to ease and gradually

progress what equates to having your parents one day, and having different parents the next.

Such is the story of 11 year-old me. It hasnt been until recent years that Ive began to discover

the impact it has had on me subconsciously, psychologically, and behaviourally. Here I will detail

the events that occurred and subsequently, how they have affected me throughout my life.

It was July of 2003. My brother Derek and I were just returning to our home in Windsor,

Illinois after riding our bikes and frolicking around the town. Entering the neighbourhood

something already seemed different; there was a quiet tension about the air. Rounding the corner

brought us in sight of our street, and in sight of the numerous vehicles parked along it, most of

which were police cars. As we slowly approached the house to investigate the commotion we

were promptly guided aside by a uniformed officer, and asked to remain there until someone

would come to speak with us, and hopefully shed some light on the situation. A professionally

attired lady emerged from the house, and looked at us with a comfortingly intentioned smile. She

approached us and explained as carefully as she could that our parents had been arrested and that

we shouldnt worry, because she will be ensuring were taken care of. Much care was taken on

her part to shield us from unnecessary details in the case, so as not to scare us with the severity

of the infringements our parents were being charged with.

Felony counts of possession, manufacture, and distribution of methamphetamine were

among the charges being pursued. We were assured by our parents that it wouldnt stick, that it



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was propagated by other individuals who were responsible for the crimes, or at least more

responsible. Within a couple of days we were relocated to a family in Neoga, Illinois.

Expectations of being home in a week turned to two weeks, then a month, several months, a year,

until there was very little expectation remaining. The first night was difficult; still confused by

the situation, I wept as I laid down to sleep, wondering why this had to happen. That was the last

time I let the situation bother me. We had regular monthly visits to see our parents in jail, and

subsequently, prison. It was good to see them, but by this time, they didnt feel so much like my

parents; nor did my foster parents. We were in the first home for about a year before foster care

licensing renewal for our foster parents put us in a decision between adoption, or finding another

home. Our visit supervisor, who was responsible for transporting us to visits and supervising

them, expressed interest in taking us in, and so it was. We lived in the second home, which was

also in Neoga, for about a year as well, before differences and disputes of increasing severity

between my foster mother and I led to finding a new home. My brother and I were glad to be out

of there, as neither of us enjoyed the stay. The third, and final, home we were placed in belonged

to the parents of one of my classmates. I remained there, well taken care of, for the 5-6 years

until I turned 18; where I then moved in with my father shortly after he was released from prison,

followed by my mother about a year later. I now live well on my own and my brother is in

college, living in the dorms.

Living through this situation, it never seemed as tough an experience as people acclaimed

me for it being. I never wished for my old life, or felt as if I had been dealt a poor hand. I have

only recently realised the impacts this has had on me as a person. Much of social interaction for

some time far more conscious than the normal. I found myself having to fake what I should feel,



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what I should do in many situations that shouldn't require much thought or deliberation. I

became very introverted, consumed in my own thoughts. I struggled with not feeling emotions

when I should, with empathising, with maintaining relationships, with caring about much more

than my current obsession, whatever that may be; tinges of Antisocial Personality Disorder, or

Sociopathy. I had often fantasised of the Sherlock Holmesian idea of being a cold, logical

thinker; it sometimes wasn't, or rather isn't, as great as it sounds.

Through all of this, I would never trade who I am for a more "normal" life. It has turned

me into a logical thinker, made me easily adaptive to new and changing situations, and very

much shaped me into the person that I am today; a person that I am glad to be. I still struggle

with many of the "problems" that arose from this, though I try to find ways to put them to good

use, rather than fight them. I try to find ways to not consider them problems at all, but rather

unique fruits of my unique experiences. It has made me a generally stronger person, and given

me experiences and people that I wouldn't have otherwise. I will probably never in my life

realise all of the connections of my nonstandard past experiences to my current self, though I am

thankful that those connections are there, and continue to influence my life.


Effects Of The Foster Care System

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