by Benni Cinkle (:

That Girl in PinksINTERNET SURVIVAL GUIDE

For kids who live their lives online (and the moms and dads who love them!)

Surviving life on the Internet is about being okay with who you are, quirks and all!

Life online moves ridiculously fastA long time ago (like, last week), I was

just this middle school kid who loves Justin Bieber, loves hanging out with her

friends, and loves doing all the things youd expect someone like me would do. Then, something happened, and overnight literally I found myself in the Internet spotlight... and the object of some pretty

mean behavior.That something was a friend of mines

music video. (Its for a song she recorded called Friday. You may have heard of it by now, haha!) I danced in the video. Not

very well. Okay, it was extremely awkward. But I had a good time doing it, and it was just fun to be there and support my friend. I honestly didnt think anything of it.

Well. Apparently, the Internet did! And

within a matter of hours, I was singled out in the video for my dancing and publicly humiliated for my lack of talent. Overnight,

I was renamed That Girl in Pink and became the target of many cruel comments. Like I said, life online moves

ridiculously fast, and you never know what to expect. At that point, I figured I had two choices:

1. I could take things personally and feel bad, or

2. I could not take things personally and not feel bad.

I chose not to feel bad.

Turn things around so you feel goodSo I logged in and started responding

to the comments. I didnt address all of

them because that would have been impossible (within one day I had over 5,000 questions. Im sorry if I never responded to you

Super Easy Tips for Surviving Life Online

Remember: Its not personal.

Im not gunna lie. When Friday first hit the Internet, I was kinda surprised by all

of the negative comments that were directed at me

and my dancing. But then I realized a few things. First, even though people online

were trying to make it about me, it really wasnt. How

could it be? They dont even know me! And the crazy assumptions they were

making about me? Those were based on what people

had seen or heard not on any kind of truth. Maybe Im not a good dancer, but I

never claimed to be one. Im okay with who I am and

what I do with my life, and anything anyone else says good or bad cant

change that.

Hear what you want to hear, see what you

want to see. The thing about the

Internet is, you get to choose how you

take what someone says about you. Because I have this

choice, I can either look at a comment

as hurtful or just decide to make a joke out of it. Guess

which option I go with? (: I can also

imagine that the comment is coming from a friend who

knows me and likes me. When I do this, I

think of something funny to say in response, and it

takes the sting out of it.

Think before you

speak!Im comfortable with

who I am, but I also know that Im still a work in progress (I am still a kid!).

For this reason, Im always on the lookout for things I

can do to improve myself. Thats why I take the time to listen to what people say

online. Sometimes, when it feels like their criticisms are

coming from a place of kindness, I might find that theres some truth to what

they say and try to learn from it. And Im okay with

that, because Im still figuring out how to handle myself and how to handle

what others say about me.

But at other times, its very clear that someone is

just being mean. When this happens, I decide to ignore that comment and focus on

another comment from someone else who is

coming from a positive place and respond to them instead. This way, no matter

what is being said, when I decide to truly listen, I think

before I speak. That helps me to keep everything in perspective.

Keep your parents in the loop.

Just like in the real

world, kids shouldnt have to live life online alone. I

think its good to talk to your parents about what youre going through online (good

or bad) because they care

I painted this for my mom, so even though I cant dance, Im still pretty artistic!

Time offline can be a life saver, so dont forget to take a break. Your online friends can wait!

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about you and want to know whats going on in your life.

I also think its really important to share things that make you uncomfortable or worried. Because

lets face it: Problems that are bottled up inside will only get worse. And

things do get better when you ask for help. Dont be ashamed to ask. Everyone needs help sometimes.

If you dont feel like you can talk to your mom or dad, try to find another

adult that you trust and feel you can talk to. If that doesnt work, ask a close friend to help. And remember:

Adults might seem uncool a lot of the time, but believe it or not, theyve been

in your shoes before, and they know what youre going through.

Stay true to yourself.

People sometimes ask me, If you could, would you change anything about your Internet experience, good

or bad? Heres my answer: Dancing awkwardly in the Friday video has

done some amazing things for me. I mean, now I get to talk to kids just like me from all around the world. I cant

even begin to tell you how many people have written to say that they

are so happy to see me out there being myself, and that my dancing has given them courage to be who they

are. Even if thats not exactly perfect. And you know what? That feels really

good! So if my dancing helps just one other kid out there to feel a little bit better about who they are and where

they are in life, then Im happy. (:

I never went on the Internet thinking I was going to change the

world. But in my own small way, I think I have made a difference. Read some of the comments on my Facebook. Or

check out my YouTube page. Youll see people there are speaking from

the heart and congratulating me for how Ive handled the negative comments that have come my way.

But Im just being myself. And no matter what happens, Im just going to

stay happy and stay positive about things. Because life is better when youre smiling. And if youre smiling

along with me? Thats just gunna make the whole world brighter!

If youre a kid like me, I hope this little ebook helps you survive life

online. If youre the mom or dad of a kid like me, I hope this ebook will

make it easier for you talk to your kids about their online experiences and help them through the ups and downs

that are a normal part of life online.

If you have any questions for me or would like to share your story, youre always welcome in my online

world! Follow me on twitter (@benni_cinkle), friend me on

Facebook (http://www.facebook.com/BennetCinkle), or join me on Tumblr (http://benni-cinkle.tumblr.com). And if

you want to follow me in Spanish, Im on Taringa! (http://www.taringa.net/

perfil/bennicinkle)

Ill see you online!