Guided Revision

EA 3

MLA Format

●12 point font, double spaced, 1” margins●Title: centered

●Header with name and page number on the top right corner

●Heading in correct MLA order:

Your Name

Ms. Ritter

World Literature

4 May 2015

INTRODUCTORY PARAGRAPH

Introduction - Components• Hook- Does it relate to civilization?

• Definition- Do you clearly show the reader what defines a

civilized society?

• Is a TAG (Title, Author, Genre) statement present in intro?

• Is the title italicized?

• Do you have a clear thesis in which you directly state if the

Ibo society is civilized or not?

• Does your thesis also mention the three features?

If you answer no to any of these question, REVISE!

Note: if your hook is a quote, be sure to include quote set-up

EX. Dwight D. Eisenhower once said, “quotation.”

Varied Sentence Beginnings (VSB)

• Examine the first word of each sentence in your introduction paragraph

• Each sentence must start with a different word

• If you have sentences that begin with the same words, fix it!

• HINT: Sometimes this revision requires moving around parts of the sentence to create a new beginning.

Formal Style

• No 1st or 2nd person; no contractions

• If a contraction was used in cited evidence, keep it.

• Use precise language--children instead of kids, avoid bad, good, and other weak words.

• Does the intro paragraph use any I, you, we, us, etc. words?

• If yes because it is in a quote, leave it.

• If yes because it is in your writing, change it.

Conventions

• Re-read for grammar, spelling, punctuation errors– Correct if you see any

• Double check for the “No Excuse Words”--they’re, there, their --to, too, two

--effect/affect --it’s/its

• Grammar questions? Unsure if something is wrong? Ask!

SUPPORT PARAGRAPHS (evidence)

Topic SentenceFirst sentence of your paragraph

Does your first sentence explicitly state the element of society (Government, Religion, and Societal Roles) along with the stance you are analyzing?

Example:Government in the Ibo society is at an advanced stage of social and moral development and therefore it is considered civilized.

Quote Context

• Did you provide some type of context to the reader before introducing your quotes?

• That is, pretend the reader never read Things Fall Apart. What would they need to know to understand your quote?

Integrating Quotes: Eliminating Island Quotes!

• NO ISLAND QUOTES!– Island Quote = a quote by itself (“on an island”)

with none of your own words leading up to it• Island Quote Example:“We have heard both sides of the case...Our duty is not to blame this man or to praise that but to settle the dispute” (Achebe 93).

• Fix it!The civilized nature of the court is apparent when Evil Forest says, “We have heard both sides of the case...Our duty is not to blame this man or to praise that but to settle the dispute” (Achebe 93).

Citations

• Identify citations for all of your quotes/evidence – if it’s missing, make a note to add!

• Correct citations following all quotes:

– Author: (Achebe 93)

– But… if your quote set up states the author’s name, you just put in the page number. (See example below!)

• Properly place a period AFTER the parentheses of citation

– The civilized nature of the court is apparent when Achebe writes, “We have heard both sides of the case...Our duty is not to blame this man or to praise that but to settle the dispute” (93).

● Citations must go at end of sentence.

Analysis

• Does your quote analysis effectively explain

why the Ibo society is civilized or uncivilized?

• Is your line of reasoning explicit?

Concluding Sentence

• As you finish your first support paragraph, do you effectively wrap your thoughts up to help the reader understand you have completed your point?

• Ex. Overall, the justice and governmental system of the Ibo society fits the definition of a civilized society.

Check your other body paragraphs...

• Revisit the previous slides as necessary.

• Be sure to add a transition word at the start

of each new paragraph/idea.

Varied Sentence Beginnings (VSB)• Examine the first word of each sentence in your

individual paragraph

• Each sentence must start with a different word

• If you have sentences that begin with the same words,fix it!

• Be sure to use transitional fluency words (3 per paragraph)(beginning, before 2nd quote, conclusion)

• HINT: Sometimes this revision requires moving around parts of the sentence to create a new beginning.

Formal Style

• No 1st or 2nd person; no contractions

• If a contraction was used in cited evidence, keep it.

• Use precise language--children instead of kids, avoid bad, good, and other weak words.

Does the support paragraph use any I, you, we, us, etc. words?

If yes because it is in a quote, leave it.

If yes because it is in your writing, change it.

Conventions

● Re-read for grammar, spelling, punctuation errors: Correct if you see any

● Double check for the “No Excuse Words”--they’re, there, their --to, too, two

--effect/affect --it’s/its

● Grammar questions? Unsure if something is wrong? Ask!

CONCLUSION PARAGRAPH

• Did you restate your thesis in a new way?

• Don’t just copy and paste! Restate in a new way!

• Did you recap Government, Religion/ Beliefs, and Societal

Roles sections?

• A sentence for each would be effective.

• Did you end with a strong concluding sentence that relates

your analysis to a theme or purpose of Things Fall Apart?

• Did you answer the question why did Chinua Achebe

depict the Ibo culture the way he did?

Concluding Paragraph

Varied Sentence Beginnings (VSB)

• Examine the first word of each sentence in your conclusion paragraph

• Each sentence must start with a different word

• If you have sentences that begin with the same words, fix it!

• HINT: Sometimes this revision requires moving around parts of the sentence to create a new beginning.

Formal Style

• No 1st or 2nd person; no contractions

• If a contraction was used in cited evidence, keep it.

• Use precise language--children instead of kids, avoid bad, good, and other weak words.

Does the support paragraph use any I, you, we, us, etc. words?

If yes because it is in a quote, leave it.

If yes because it is in your writing, change it.

Conventions

• Re-read for grammar, spelling, punctuation errors: Correct if you see any

• Double check for the “No Excuse Words”--they’re, there, their --to, too, two

--effect/affect --it’s/its

• Grammar questions? Unsure if something is wrong? Ask!