DO THE THING YOU DREADThere’s Blessing on the Other Side of Fear

“Dread - to fear something with a

strong emotional response, physical

impact, immobilized

WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO DREAD?

➤ To dread means “to fear something with a strong

emotional response and in such a way, that it actually

has a physical impact.”

➤ Very often, it has the effect of immobilizing us

➤ Dread causes us to put off doing things we should get

done; to avoid facing things we ought to face.

➤ Procrastination is almost always a manifestation of

dread.

WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO DREAD?

➤ Clearly, we cannot live a life that counts for the

kingdom when we are immobilized by dread.

➤ Consider the ways dread might be robbing you of your

destiny.

JACOB’S DREAD

➤ He lived and worked with his

father-in-law, apparently long

after he had fulfilled his

obligations, even though the

man repeatedly lied to him,

cheated him and changed his

wages time after time. This was

not someone worth hanging

around. But Jacob stayed, year

after miserable year. Why?

Probably for a variety of reasons

but I think the underlying

reason was because he dreaded

going home to face his twin

brother, Esau.

HOW ABOUT YOU?

➤ Do you have any relatives or someone in your past that

you don’t want to face?

➤ Maybe it’s someone or something in your life right

now that dread dealing with it.

➤ So you keep putting it off.

Finally, Jacob’s situation became so unbearable that he

decided to head home. He sent messengers laden with

bribes to face his brother before he had to. That’s always

a good idea; if you’re afraid to face someone in person,

send them a present!

JACOB’S DREAD

“When the messengers returned to Jacob, they said, “We

went to your brother Esau, and now he is coming to meet

you, and four hundred men are with him.”

In great fear and distress Jacob divided the people who

were with him into two groups, and the flocks and herds

and camels as well.

He thought, “If Esau comes and attacks one group, the

group that is left may escape.”

JACOB’S DREAD

Then Jacob prayed, “O God of my father Abraham, God

of my father Isaac, O LORD, who said to me, ‘Go back to

your country and your relatives, and I will make you

prosper,’ I am unworthy of all the kindness and

faithfulness you have shown your servant. I had only my

staff when I crossed this Jordan, but now I have become

two groups. Save me, I pray, from the hand of my brother

Esau, for I am afraid he will come and attack me, and also

the mothers with their children.” Genesis 32:6-11

JACOB’S DREAD

FACING DREAD

IS ALWAYS

A STRUGGLE

➤ Clearly, Jacob is filled with dread, but he is walking

steadfastly forward for one reason.

➤ We find it in verse 12: “………….but YOU HAVE

SAID” (Gen 32:12, emphasis added)

➤ Jacob was afraid, but he doing what he believed God

had told him to do.

JACOB’S DREAD

In the New International Version, there are two sub-titles

included in Chapter 32. They are:

➤ Jacob prepares to meet

➤ Esau Jacob Wrestles with God

➤ Although those were added after the text was written,

I truly believe they are God-inspired.

➤ That’s exactly what Genesis chapter 32 is all about.

JACOB’S DREAD

MAKE THE CONNECTION

➤ Jacob is preparing to face his brother Esau and that is

why he wrestles with God.

➤ I think it’s so unfortunate that these two events are

rarely connected in our minds or in the messages we

hear.

➤ It’s critical to make the connection.

➤ God had asked Jacob to do something he absolutely,

positively didn’t want to do.

MAKE THE CONNECTION

➤ He dreaded it. He was struggling with God but

pressing forward in obedience anyway.

➤ Wrestling and Pressing Forward.

NOTICE TIMING AND CONTEXT

“So Jacob's gifts went on ahead of him, but he himself

spent the night in the camp. That night Jacob got up and

took his two wives, his two maidservants and his eleven

sons and crossed the ford of the Jabbok. After he had

sent them across the stream, he sent over all his

possessions.

NOTICE TIMING AND CONTEXT

So Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him till

daybreak. When the man saw that he could not

overpower him, he touched the socket of Jacob's hip so

that his hip was wrenched as he wrestled with the man.

Then the man said, "Let me go, for it is daybreak."

“But Jacob replied, "I will not let you

go unless you bless me."   

JACOB’S PERSPECTIVE

➤ His father in law had deceived him and taken

advantage of him.

➤ His brother had threatened to kill him; that’s why he

ran away from home in the first place.

➤ Now 400 men are apparently coming against him.

➤ This guy is wrestling with him.

➤ Everybody’s out to get him.

➤ He’s just the innocent victim here!

GOD’S PERSPECTIVE

➤ It’s time for Jacob to own his part.

➤ Why? Because when you are a powerless victim, life is

out of your control

➤ You didn’t cause your problems, so there’s no way for

you to resolve them.

➤ But when you recognize that you have a role in

creating your problems — that life is not mysterious -

you are empowered to resolve them, with God’s help.

GOD’S PERSPECTIVE

➤ Jacob was wrestling with God.

➤ He also needed to wrestle with his own role in the

whole sorry mess.

➤ He needed to wrestle free of the victim mentality.

➤ There is freedom, power and COURAGE in stepping

up to life with a victor’s mentality.

GOD’S PERSPECTIVE

The man asked him, "What is your name?"

In other words, God was saying, “Jacob, I know you can

name all of people who’ve done you wrong; all the

villains in your life who have rendered you the helpless

victim. Powerless over your own life and destiny.

But who are YOU? Do you have a role in your past?

Because if you do, then you can know for certain that you

can have a role in shaping your future.

OVERCOMING THE VICTIM MENTALITY

➤ It’s hard enough to face the villains in our life; it’s much

more difficult to face the victim mentality in ourselves.

➤ More than Jacob dreaded facing his brother, I think he

dreaded facing the truth about himself. But it had to be

done.

➤ So God posed the question designed to enable him to

look himself in the mirror.

“"Jacob," he answered.

  

GOD’S PERSPECTIVE

Jacob means deceiver. And that’s what Jacob was. If we

go back to the day these twins were born, we discover

that Jacob “came out, with his hand grasping Esau's heel;

so he was named Jacob. [Jacob means he grasps the

heel (figuratively, he deceives ).]

OVERCOMING THE VICTIM MENTALITY

➤ Jacob had to own his part in this whole sorry mess.

➤ He had played a part—a huge part—in creating it

➤ Whether he wanted to face it or not, he couldn’t move

forward until he took some ownership.

➤ Then, from that empowered position, he could find the

courage to move forward.

➤ Life didn't just happen “to" him. It also happened "because

of" him.

➤ That's actually very good news!

OVERCOMING THE VICTIM MENTALITY

➤ It was Jacob who had taken advantage of his brother

at a vulnerable moment to rob him of his birthright.

➤ It was Jacob, with help from his mom, who had

deceived his dad and robbed Esau of his father’s

blessing.

➤ The Bible makes it plain that Esau had problems of his

own and could easily be cast as the villain, so I’m not

making light of that truth. In the New Testament, God

himself says he didn’t like Esau either (verse).

OVERCOMING THE VICTIM MENTALITY

➤ But that’s not the point. Right now, God wants Jacob

to own his part. The truth about Esau won’t set Jacob

free.

➤ Only the truth about Jacob can set Jacob free.

➤ He had hurt his brother.

➤ He had a major character flaw that God wanted to deal

with before he could bless him.

GOD ALWAYS DEALS

WITH OUR

CHARACTER FIRST

CHARACTER FIRST

➤ We want the blessing of God.

➤ God says, “For sure….first step on the road to my

blessing is dealing with your character.”

➤ Correcting our faulty thinking.

➤ Victim Mentality v. Victor’s Mindset

➤ Even if God blesses someone with a victim mentality,

they will squander the blessing.

➤ Esau is the perfect case in point. What did he do with

the blessings freely bestowed upon him at birth?

CHARACTER FIRST

➤ We value what we wrestle for; we rarely value

something handed to us.

➤ In that moment, as Jacob uttered his own name, I

think something happened. I think a light dawned; I

think he owned his stuff. “Yeah, I guess I was a

deceiver, wasn’t I? I guess I do need to take the blame.

This mess is my fault and I’m going to have to take

responsibility, I must dare to face it even though I

dread it.”

CHARACTER FIRST

➤ We value what we wrestle for; we rarely value

something handed to us.

➤ In that moment, as Jacob uttered his own name, I

think something happened. I think a light dawned; I

think he owned his stuff. “Yeah, I guess I was a

deceiver, wasn’t I? I guess I do need to take the blame.

This mess is my fault and I’m going to have to take

responsibility, I must dare to face it even though I

dread it.”

“Lord, show me me. Because only the

truth about me can ever set me free.

Only the truth about me can open the

door to a life of blessing.   

“Then the man said, "Your name will

no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because

you have struggled with God and with

men and have overcome"

- Genesis 32:21-28 

MEETING GOD HALF-WAY

➤ I believe what God was saying to Jacob was this: “I

know you didn’t want to come here; didn’t want to face

your brother. You dreaded it. But you dared to do it

anyway out of obedience to me. Because you overcame

your dread, I’m going to bless you and give you a new

name.”

➤ When we demonstrate to God our willingness to face

uncomfortable truths about ourselves, we show him we

are serious about partnering with him to fulfill our

destinies.

➤ Israel means struggles with God.

➤ His name means that he was willing to do things that

weren’t easy.

➤ It’s easy to do easy things!

➤ Will you dare to do the things you dread?

➤ That’s where the blessings are.

➤ That’s the road to a life that counts.

IT’S EASY TO DO EASY THINGS

SOMETIMES WE HAVE TO GO BACK TO GO FORWARD

➤ Sometimes We Must Go Back the Way We Came

➤ God told Jacob to go back the way he came.

➤ Incidentally, it’s the same instructions he gave Elijah

when he was hiding in a cave, dreading the thought of

facing Jezebel.

➤ Same thing he told Moses.

SOMETIMES WE HAVE TO GO BACK TO GO FORWARD

➤ Even though God told Jacob to do it and promised to

bless him didn’t make it any easier.

➤ God never said it would be easy; he just said it was

necessary IF Jacob wanted to move forward to a life

that really counted.

➤ Is there a place you may have to go back to before you

can go forward?

➤ Is there something in your past you need to own?

IS OKAY OKAY?

➤ Jacob had an okay life.

➤ He had a beautiful wife he adored.

➤ He was also stuck with her ugly sister whom he

apparently couldn’t stand.

➤ He had a whole tribe of kids.

➤ He had lots of stuff.

➤ He could have stayed in (town with his father-in-law)

until he died.

IS OKAY OKAY?

➤ But I don’t believe he would have fulfilled his destiny

in the Kingdom of God, I don’t think he would have

experienced the blessings of God, if he hadn’t dared to

do the thing he dreaded most.

➤ In fact, God had said IF you return, THEN I will bless

you.

➤ If…then yes.

➤ If not…then no.

➤ We can choose an okay life…or a blessed one.

IS OKAY OKAY?

➤ If you want to live an ordinary life, a so-so existence,

you have that option.

➤ Just stay right where you are and don’t change a thing.

➤ But you will never enter into your destiny, you will

never experience the blessings of God, you will not live

a life that counts, unless you are willing to dare to do

what you dread most.

FACING

YOUR

FEAR

WILL YOU DARE?

➤ Jacob dared to face his greatest fear.

➤ He didn’t want to face his brother.

➤ He didn’t want to go back.

➤ He didn’t want to face the truth about who he was or

the mistakes he had made.

➤ He was so afraid he was finally going to get what he

had coming to him.

WILL YOU DARE?

➤ Is that what this trip home was about?

➤ No. God wasn’t trying to set him up “get what was

coming to him.”

➤ He wanted to bless him, just like he wants to bless

you.

➤ When God asks you to do the difficult things, when he

asks you to face the truth about who you are, the

people you’ve hurt and the mistakes you made, it’s not

because he’s out to get you.

WILL YOU DARE?

➤ Jacob was terrified to face his brother, but watch what

happens: “But Esau ran to meet Jacob and embraced

him; he threw his arms around his neck and kissed

him. And they wept” (Genesis 33:4).

➤ I can see why Jacob spent all those years dreading that!

➤ I can see how he was so much better off with his

crooked father-in-law.

➤ The gifts paved the way.

➤ His new life showed he wasn’t the same person.

THE RIGHT QUESTION

➤ Don’t Ask “What’s the Worst That Could Happen?”

➤ Ask:“What’s the Best That Could Happen?”

➤ Jacob manufactured and then responded to a situation

that didn’t even exist!

➤ Is it possible you are doing the same?

➤ Is it possible that person or situation you dread facing

has actually changed?

➤ Sometimes we create something out of nothing.

THE RIGHT QUESTION

➤ Jacob has clearly created something out of nothing; at

the very least, he has blown the situation completely

out of proportion.

➤ Don’t miss Esau’s sense of humor in his

remarks:“What do you mean by all these droves I

met?”

“To find favor in your eyes, my lord,” he said.

But Esau said, “I already have plenty, my brother. Keep

what you have for yourself.”

THE RIGHT QUESTION

➤ Here’s a great irony to consider: Esau never actually

did anything to Jacob. Never! All he did was talk

about him behind his back. Yet Jacob was terrified to

face him. My guess? Because of his own guilty

conscience.

➤ Jacob is the one who had hurt Esau!

WHAT DOES GOD REQUIRE

➤ The Bible says, “If possible, as far as it depends on

you, live at peace with all men.” God wasn’t requiring

Jacob to become best friends with Esau; he didn’t

require him to allow Esau back into his life. He didn’t

tell him to let them kids grow up together and reunite

their families.

➤ God simply said, “Go face yourself by facing him; then

we can move forward to those blessings you’ve been

asking me for.”

WHAT DOES GOD REQUIRE

➤ Sometimes we dread taking a step of obedience

because we actually think God is requiring more than

he is!

➤ These two brothers went their separate ways. But they

were at peace with each other.

➤ Sometimes that’s all God asks.

➤ People will almost always ask more of you than

God requires. [Esau wanted more than

reconciliation, more than God required.]

GOD’S OBJECTIVE IS PEACE

➤ Jesus said, "Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to

you; not as the world gives, do I give to you. Let not

your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful" (John

14:27).

➤ Dread is a form of fear and the Bible clearly states that

“God hasn’t given us a spirit of fear.”

➤ “Do not let your hearts be troubled neither let them be

afraid. Stop allowing yourselves to be agitated and

disturbed; and do not permit yourselves to be fearful

and intimidated and cowardly and unsettled.” [AMP]

GOD’S OBJECTIVE IS PEACE

➤ Actively choose to live in peace even if it means you

have to take the first step. Psalm 34:14 says “Seek

peace and pursue it.” It’s not going to drop down

upon you out of Heaven.

➤ If you want your life to count, then you absolutely

positively will have to do things, lots of things, that

you are tempted to dread.

➤ You’ll have to be “the one who takes the first step” to

heal hurting relationships, to have difficult

conversations, to make hard choices.

THE ENEMY

PAWNS OFF

DREAD

IS DREAD BLOCKING YOUR DESTINY?

➤ What do you dread? Guess what? That’s exactly what

the Enemy of Your Soul dreads you’ll do because it is

more than the likely the very thing that will open the

road to your destiny!!

➤ Jacob was on the road to becoming Israel. On the road to his destiny and the unlimited blessings of God.

➤ On the road to ushering in The King of Kings!

➤ No wonder the enemy wanted to block the path.

WHAT DO YOU DREAD?

➤ Making a phone call

➤ Healing a relationship

➤ Getting your life in order

➤ Going back to school

➤ Changing jobs

➤ Starting your own business

➤ Launching into a new ministry

➤ Writing a book or booking an event

WHAT DO YOU DREAD?

➤ You can be sure of this: Dread, as a form of fear,

cannot possibly be from God.

➤ Dread is from the Devil who is trying to prevent you

from experiencing God’s blessings and letting your life

count.

➤ Whatever you dread most, that’s probably the very

thing God wants you to do so he can bless you!

➤ Unless of course you dread sinning…but that’s

another message for another day.

WHAT DO YOU DREAD?

➤ If you dread exercise, it’s because the Enemy dreads

to see you exercise. He dreads the thought that you

might become truly fit to serve your king. He likes

you sick and tired, unable to get up off the couch. He

dreads what exercise might do for your total well-

being. He dreads that you might feel so energized and

empowered that you start doing serious damage to his

cause.

➤ www.donnapartow.com/yes

WHAT DO YOU DREAD?

➤ If you dread writing that book, it’s probably because

the devil knows you’re called to be an authority on

that subect.

➤ www.donnapartow.com/authority

WHAT DO YOU DREAD?

➤ If you dread launching out in ministry, it’s because the

enemy knows you have a message the world needs to

hear.

➤ www.donnapartow.com/message

WHAT DO YOU DREAD?

➤ Decidophobia - the abnormal dread of making

decisions

➤ Is your life really that great right now that you

wouldn’t dare make a change, because you might blow

the whole thing? Is your life really that great? Maybe

it is. I doubt it.

➤ Make a great decision right now. Decide that you will

dare to do do the very thing you dread.

STOP DREADING RISKS

➤ Researchers surveyed people over the age of 90, and

asked, “What would you do differently if you could live

your life all over again.” One of the top three answers

was “I would risk more.” (The other two were “I

would do more significant things”—in other words, I

would let my life count and “I would reflect more”—in

other words, I would seriously consider whether or not

the things I was devoting my life to actually counted

for something.

STOP DREADING RISKS

➤ Why don’t we take a chance?

➤ Why don’t we sing that song; write that book; register

for that class; sign up for a mission trip; go back to

school, pursue a degree, look for a better job?

➤ We’re afraid of what people might think and it seems

safer to just sit and do nothing.

TEDDY ROOSEVELT

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who

points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the

doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit

belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,

whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;

who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short

again and again, there is no effort without error and

shortcoming

TEDDY ROOSEVELT

[the credit belongs to the one] who does actually

strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms,

the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy

cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph

of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails,

at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place

shall never be with those cold and timid souls who

neither know victory nor defeat.

TIME TO DO AND DARE

I love the way Eugene Petersen rendered Ephesians

3:12 in his paraphrase, The Message: “When we trust

in him, we are free to say whatever needs to be said

bold to go wherever we need to go.” Now that’s a life

that counts! Say what you need to say! Do what you

need to do. Stop living in dread. Stop avoiding. Stop

putting things off. Say what you need to say. Do what

you need to do and get on with your life. And be bold

about it.

TIME TO DO AND DARE

➤ Jacob wrestled with God; he didn’t want to do what God had

asked him to do. He dreaded it, but he dared to do it anyway.

➤ So God gave him a new name and a new life.

➤ But he had to take that step of faith.

➤ God wanted to bless Jacob; he wasn’t trying to trick him or

punish him. God knew that before Jacob could move

forward, before he could receive a new life and a new name,

he had to face the truth about what he had done to his

brother. He had to dare to do the one thing he dreaded most.

Then and only then could the blessings come.

TIME TO DO AND DARE

➤ What I dreaded for 25 years.

TIME TO DO AND DARE

➤ Jesus dreaded the cross to the point that he sweat drops of

blood…but he did it anyway.

DO THE THING YOU DREADThere’s Blessing on the Other Side of Fear