Death With a Conscience

8/6/2019 Death With a Conscience

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Death With A Conscience

by

Andre Cruz

SMASHWORDS EDITION

* * * * *

PUBLISHED BY:

Andre Cruz on Smashwords

Death With A Conscience

Copyright 2011 by Andre Cruz

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2/22

He carried me to the beach because I had told him that I

wanted to see a real one before we completed our mission.

When the helicopter had dropped us into the jungle, a strap

from my harness had covered my eye. I never had a chance to

see the inspiration behind my simulated dreams.

Now I could feel my dreams becoming real. I sensed

something falling on my slender body and I heard waves as

they slapped the shore. I opened my large eye expecting to

see a yellow sun and light rain falling from a partly blue

sky, just like in my dreams, but the sun

The sunsets light shone blood red through the falling

ash as the ocean reflected the dying day, like a vast

puddle of blood. The hot wind blew and I smelled death.

Where is that smell coming from? My voice vibrated

through his hands and the sensors in his gloves decoded my

language to him. I could hear his respirator from his

armored radiation suit adjust to his breathing.

I cant smell anything, but from the looks of it, its

probably all the dead fish washing up, he said.

He slowly turned me from right to left so that I could

scan the ocean. I zoomed in my eye toward the shore and to

my dismay Death waved back at me; its hands were full of

dead fish.

Lets go, I said. This is a nightmare.


3/22

Youre a nightmare, Scythe, he said.

Scythe? I thought. I stored his new name for me in my

processor. Then leave me here so that I can complete

mankinds interpretation of hell.

He laughed, which he often did from my quips. The

scientists made sure they paired me with a soldier who was

compatible with my personality, or at least they said they

did. We had been together for two weeks of basic training

and a half-an-hour on this mission and I was already

surprised in his name choice for me. Maybe its the

environment? I thought as I looked at the shore, which was

littered with hundreds of dead fish covered in ash.

His chuckle sounded alien from his respirator. You

think this is hell? He asked. Wait until we reach the

target. He looked up at the falling ash. By now they

probably have a riot on their hands.

We turned and moved toward the jungle. I could see that

the ash collecting on the palm trees was making their tops

sag, which gave the appearance that Mother Nature was

bowing her head in sadness to the atrocity man had

inadvertently committed on her beach.

Seriously though, Im sorry about the fallout ruining

what would have been a beautiful tropical sunset, he said.


4/22

You should feel sorry for the naval fleet that was wiped

out from the explosion, I said.

I prayed for their families when we flew over the

debris, he said.

You should have told me when you were praying, I said. I

would have joined you.

He stopped walking. Scythe, please dont say things

like that. Its creepy.

Why is it creepy? I asked.

You may have simulated emotions, but you are still a

gun, he said.

Then I should keep quiet and be what you want me to be?

I asked. A mindless tool that destroys anyone you point me

at?

I dont see the point in the egg heads giving you

emotions, he muttered.

I watched the ash as it covered the last granules of

sand. I just had to see the beach, I said, hoping his

gloves would decode my lie with an honest tone. I did not

want him to hear my fear. I did not want to kill anyone.

He carried me toward the jungle. I understand, he

said, but I did not believe him.

When we entered the jungle, I could see the sunsets red

light poking through the holes in the canopy, leaving large


5/22

gaps of darkness hiding in between the tall trees. I tried

to take in the smell of something new besides rotting

animals, but with every other step he took, came a crunch

of bone and Deaths aroma followed.

God, he said after I heard a wet crunch.

Thank Him for not allowing you to smell what you keep

stepping on, I said.

What did I tell you about being religious, Scythe? He

asked.

I ignored him along with the sunsets red light and

turned my eye inside out to scan for life. Light blue

washed over the darkness and I held in my excitement for

the sight of life-warm red.

Do you see anything? He asked.

All I see is blue so far, I said.

Not even animals? He asked.

All dead, I said.

Damn, he said.

I felt uneasy. Are you disappointed that there isnt

anything to shoot? I asked.

Did I make it that obvious? he asked.

Why?

You arent interested to see how effective you are on

live targets? he asked.


6/22

I thought about lying again, but what I was feeling

wouldnt let me. No, I said.

A crash sounded. Fifty yards to our right! I said.

He spun to our right and I saw a flash of red leaping

toward us. He pulled my trigger and silence came from my

muzzle. My bullet did not even leave a flash in the air or

a casing to drop. The only evidence of my violence was a

heavy thud that sounded forty-nine point seven yards away.

Shit, He said quickly. What was it?

I did not want to say, for something new leapt from the

rotting smell in the jungle. It was the smell of fresh

blood. I replayed the target as it was seconds ago when

alive; a six-foot red figure with a muscular frame bounding

toward me with its arms outstretched. It wanted to take me

or no not it, he I replayed the way his arms were

outstretched. Dread came over me. That man was asking for

help.

Scythe, was it a hostile? He asked.

It was a man, I said.

That isnt what I asked. He said.

Jimmy! A man screamed in the distance.

He jerked me up and looked into the back of my eye to

see who had screamed. I could see through the light

vegetation a bright red figure kneeling besides a fallen


7/22

one, which was spilling its warm red color onto the cold

blue ground.

The bullets computer chip, which was lodged in the

fallen mans right ventricle, told me he had died on

impact. It was my first kill.

He bent down and crept toward the grieving man, leaving

me no time to think about the murder I had just committed.

Jimmy! the man wailed as we settled a few yards away

from him. How the hell did this happen? They didnt shoot

you when we escaped.

It was me, he said as he stepped out of the darkness

and thrust me through the red sunlight into the mans face

as if I had spoken, as if I had acted alone.

Dont kill me! the man said and fell over his dead

comrade onto his back.

He ignored the man and walked to the corpse, which was

turning from dull red to a shade of blue through my heat

vision. Is that because his soul had left his body? I

wanted to ask him. Its because we shot him, I knew he

would say.

He knelt over the corpse. I turned off my heat vision

and used the little light that shone through the canopy to

see that the man, my first victim, looked like every other

human I had encountered. Except that terror was the last


8/22

thing he had experienced. All because of my eagerness to

live even though I was not alive.

Why was I made to feel this? I asked myself.

Laughter boomed from above me and for a nanosecond, I

thought it was Death itself.

How can you laugh at a time like this? I asked.

Its just a damn prisoner, he said after a hard exhale.

I unfocused my attention from my regret and focused on

the man who I had murdered. I then saw him in a new light.

I realized he had on a prisoner uniform and, and, yes,

therefore he wasnt a man at all. Yes, he was an animal

who had merely escaped from the zoo. Thats what he would

say. So, then, I am not a murderer. I wanted to laugh, but

I didnt have the components to let me.

And you had me worried, Scythe, he happily said.

I looked at the dead convicts arms and noticed they had

been severely burned. Despite my wishes, the dead convicts

last moments alive replayed in my mind in a seven-second

movie. Those badly burnt arms, which only appeared a crude

red to me when he was alive, were outstretched toward me

asking for help. It, no he, he was asking to be saved. He,

not it, was a human being not an animal.

I could hear a man whimpering somewhere in the darkness

of my mind. I then realized it was the other man, who was


9/22

whimpering as he hid in the dying jungles still thick

vegetation. I was moved up and around, but I couldnt see

where the man had gone without switching to a special

vision. I could only hear him trying to choke back his

cries.

How did he get away from us? I asked.

That piece of shit got away from us while I was

thinking, he said.

About our first kill? I asked, ignoring his

dehumanization of the man.

About our first kill, he said, putting emphasis on our

like I hadnt said it.

Thats right, our, first kill, I said, I know my part.

Good, he said, which surprised me.

I could here the man trying to creep away; the thick

vegetation wouldnt let him leave quietly.

Are you ready to kill again? He asked, which sounded

like he was talking to himself.

We dont have to if we find him, I said.

And then what? He asked. We arrest him and put him

where?

I let my processor search for the best possible solution

while my emotions kept telling me to kill. I did not want


10/22

the convict to harm me. I fought my fear with reason, an

action I hoped he was doing as well.

In training, he didnt act this way. Of course, in

training he had nothing to fear. I thought of what to say

to ease him into rationality.

When we find, him, we will place him under arrest, I

said.

And place, him, where? He asked.

We will bind him to a tree until we come back for him, I

said.

I felt his heartbeat quicken. I couldnt tell if it was

because of anger or fear.

Are you okay? I asked.

Lead the way, he said.

I turned my eye to x-ray vision and scanned the jungle.

I could still feel his rapid heartbeat, which made me think

about my current emotion.

I wont let him hurt you, I said.

He ignored me as he slowly turned me from left to right.

Maybe he isnt afraid, I thought.

In the darkness, a white figure appeared like a ghost

thirty-two point three yards away. Before I could say the

mans coordinates, I felt a burst of speed and then felt


11/22

hot wind rush against my body. All I could smell from the

wind was death.

He held my tightly as he avoided trees, ducked under low

vines, and leaped through thick growths toward the running

white figure. I could hear the crunch of bones of the small

dead animals as he ran over them. We are chasing a ghost in

a graveyard, I thought.

I could feel the hard pounding of his heartbeat through

his gloves as we moved. I could hear his quick breathing. I

felt his excitement as it started to corrupt me. I was even

beginning to think that the rapid rhythm of his thundering

heartbeat was my own. We were becoming something new to

this dark world, something both man and machine. I began to

worry.

We were getting closer to the running man, so close that

I could smell his perspiration, which smelled better than

the rotting flesh that surrounded me, so much better, that

suddenly I didnt want to smell anything else. He smelled

alive.

I felt myself stop and rise to his face to take aim at

the running man.

Wait! I tried to scream, but before I could lock my

trigger, he pulled it. I saw the bright white light


12/22

disappear in the blackness and heard the ghost crash on to

the ground twenty-one yards away.

While a pounding heartbeat made me tremble, I quickly

turned on my heat vision, hoping to see a red figure where

I heard the crash. The bullet sent back a message, which

read death. Why did I kill him? I asked myself. I heard a

footstep and I suddenly remembered the heartbeat did not

belong to me.

That was the best way, he said.

I could feel his heartbeat begin to slow down along with

his breathing.

I searched my memory banks to find my words. For you, I

finally said.

For this mission, he said. We are not here to rescue

the prisoners.

You didnt have to kill him, I said.

Now you have a change in

In heart, yes, I said, I tried to think like you about

these convicts, but I cant. They are people too.

If we did it your way he would have killed me, he said.

You are fully armored, you shouldnt be afraid of an

unarmed man, I said.


13/22

You are a machine, you shouldnt be afraid to die, he

said. But you are afraid and thats why you didnt follow

through with locking your trigger when I took aim at him.

I fell silent.

He walked on. You think I didnt feel it when you tried

to lock your trigger? I wanted to lock the trigger myself,

but just like you Scythe, I couldnt.

I didnt want to kill him, I said.

Youre a gun and Im a soldier, we didnt have a

choice, he said.

I could sense the shadows grow from between the trees. I

switched to my night vision lens and let it turn the dead

jungle green in silence. There was no option for a

rebuttal. He was right.

I felt anger for being wrong about myself, for feeling

that my emotions made me too special to be just another

weapon of war. Im a high end computer in a gun meant to

keep a soldier mentally sharp thats all, I thought. Next,

I should play chess with him.

I saw a couple flakes of fallout ash lazily evade the

trees as they drifted toward me. Keep a soldiers mind

sharp to kill in order to survive in a world that has been

turned to this. I looked at the ash covering the

vegetation. Whats the purpose of surviving in a hell like


14/22

this? I asked myself even though my emotions were telling

me the answer.

I watched in silence as we journeyed through the low

vines and tall vegetation. A new smell then came to me. It

smelled of smoke and sweat. I felt dread for what was

likely to come. Human life, I thought. I turned up my

hearing to reassure what I thought I smelled and that was

when I could hear men laughing.

I have probable targets to the Northeast, forty yards, I

said.

Probable targets? He asked. You mean targets, Scythe.

If two prisoners had escaped, then there are more in the

area.

We will assess that possibility I remembered what I

was. You are right, lets get closer so I can assess the

situation.

Just dont get me killed during your assessment, He

said jokingly.

I felt a warm spark then turn into a tingling sensation.

Tell you what, Ill stay here and you follow my

coordinates, I said, wanting to stay in that moment, but he

kept walking forward.

He laughed quietly, surprising me, which was something

he was good at doing since we had began this mission.


15/22

We stopped when we both could see smoke moving above the

canopy like thick black rain clouds. I switched my lens to

partial x-ray vision, so I would not drain my energy, and

looked through the trees.

What do you see? He asked as shouts of laughter rang

through the smoky night air.

I could see armed skeletons dancing while a white fire

that had consumed a five-story building with barred windows

danced in the distance. I zoomed in on a pile of odd shapes

that was to the mens left and realized they were dead men

with their arms and legs sticking out from underneath each

other. I then remembered his question.

I see hell, I said.

I told you, he said.

They had killed all of the guards, I said. I felt relief

and then slight disgust with myself. The mission is over, I

said.

It isnt and you know that, he said. You know what we

have to do now.

I searched for another answer, but my emotions I wanted

to be numb, but those men were a threat.

I quickly scanned my surroundings and found the perfect

sniper position. I showed him the coordinates.


16/22

We crept forward, the Grim Reaper and his loyal

Scythe, toward the unsuspecting men, who all howled

bloody murder in the fiery night.

We stopped under the small opening in the undergrowth. I

switched to my night vision to try to get a clearer image

of the twenty men dancing in the great pool of night in

between the jungle and the far-off burning prison, but the

fire caused glare. I switched to my regular vision and

tried to focus on the twenty men, but all I could see were

shadows. At least, I wont see there faces, I thought.

He slowly laid me down and got himself into a prone

position. I opened up my bipod near my muzzle and he

planted it into the ground. So far, we were following our

training to the letter, the next step was to clear our

minds to prepare for the first shot. Ironic to me, as he

looked into the back of my eye with his strong eye all I

could see was a beautiful beach. I let my minds imagery

leak into my eye to show him what I was thinking. To my

surprise, he didnt yell at me. Instead, I noticed his eye

was glazed over.

What are you seeing? I asked him. His pupil constricted.

Home. He squeezed my trigger.

My bullet sliced through a man holding two pistols so

fast that he stood dead for a second before collapsing.


17/22

The other men saw the corpse and cautiously moved closer

to it. I converted to fully automatic and showed him that I

had done so in my eye.

He tapped my trigger and half of the men who were

gathered around their fallen comrade joined him.

The rest of the nine men cried out in excitement and hit

the ground, taking the prone position.

What the hell? We both asked at the same time.

Three of the men began to fire toward us, but too high.

While the rest ran to the pile of dead bodies and took

cover.

What is this? I thought.

The three men in the prone position eased their firing

while the other six men who hid behind the corpses opened

fire toward us. Bullets slammed in to the trees only inches

above us, causing bark to rain down on us. He turned and I

looked up at the huge craters the bullets were leaving in

the trees.

Your armor wont hold up against repeat fire like that,

I said.

Great observation, he mumbled.

I heard someone bark a command. He turned me back toward

the men. I saw the three of them were crawling toward us on

their stomachs, while the six continued to pin us down.


18/22

They are not prisoners, he said.

Why would an army invade this island? I asked. It is too

far away from anything important.

There is the answer right there, he said.

I switched to my night vision again, but the glare was

still too much from the prison fire. When I turned it off,

I noticed that the fires light was still too far away and

too dim to allow me to see clearly with my normal vision.

All I could see were quick yellow flashes from the six

mens guns and the shadows of the three who were crawling

toward me with deadly dark shapes in their hands.

I felt a tinge of electricity in my side, which stopped

my ability to think. The tinge flared up into burning pain

and sent my mind ablaze with agonizing visions of men

tearing me apart piece by piece.

We are going to charge them, I said as more tree bark

rained down on me from the bullets.

We? He asked. When the hell did you grow legs?

If you stay here you will die, I said while more bark

fell on me.

I know, he said.

Then you need to do exactly what I say so that you wont

be killed, I said.

Believe me, Im listening, he said.


19/22

Fire twenty two yards to the six mens right into that

vegetation, I said, And make sure you dont hit anything

over here to give away our position. Even though I dont

have muzzle flash if you hit anything over here you will

give away our exact position.

I dont miss, you know that, he said.

Unfortunately, I do, I thought.

He pressed my trigger and I sent a barrage of bullets

through the small openings in front of us into the thick

vegetation to the six mens right. The men yelled at each

other, turned, and fired upon the vegetation to their right.

Now!

He jumped over the wide tropical stems and ran under the

thick vines until he broke into the clearing where ash fell

like snow. He raised me to his strong eye and aimed at

three men, who looked like menacing shadows. He fired upon

them before they could stand and I watched them succumb to

death right before me with out even muttering a word of

discontent.

Stay focused! Look to your left at those men firing

frantically into the woods and kill them before they kill

you!

He spun around and fired, taking the lives of those six

men, leaving only dead bodies, silence and falling ash.


20/22

I could feel his heartbeat lower and his breathing ease

as he still stood holding me in the firing position.

Now, its over, he said.

Yes it is, I said.

He began to walk toward the three dead men; their limp

shadowy bodies looking unreal while a soft orange glow came

from the raging prison fire well beyond them.

Scythe, he said.

Yes, I said.

Back there, when we were in combat together

Yes? I asked.

It seemed like you were a part of me, he said.

I didnt say anything.

He hoisted me up over his shoulder and I could only look

up at the black sky while it snowed grey radioactive flakes

on me.

How did you know they would fire away from us like

that? He asked.

Because I know fear all too well, I said. I then watched

the falling radioactive ash. And I know how you humans

react to it.

He stopped. You dont know a God damn thing. He jerked

me down and pointed me at three sprawled corpses. At this


21/22

distance, I could see the mens torn flesh and see the

blood as it began to cake on their prison guard uniforms.

We turned toward the pile of dead bodies and noticed

that most of them had been burnt beyond recognition. Only a

few of the corpses arms and legs had prisoner tattoos that

were still legible.

Jesus Christ! You let me get too carried away! he

said. For the love of it all, why were you given emotions?

I thought about his question while I took in the

environment. Why were you given emotions? I could feel

the radioactive ash falling on me as that statement

replayed in my mind. Why were you given emotions? I could

still smell mens bodies burning in the tropical air as

their killers, who were once given the power to reform

them, now lay dead among them. Why were you given

emotions? I looked at the falling ash as it began to

consume the corpses. I realized why the scientist gave me

emotions, why they gave me this mind; I was surrounded by

examples. How could I had not have realized it sooner.

I locked my trigger.

What the hell are you doing? he asked.

We are not going to fail another mission like this, I

said. Or we both will be seeing more of this ash.

We? He asked. We? You failed this mission!


22/22

I made a mistake, but that was before I realized what I

was; what I was designed for, I said.

You made a mistake? He ripped the magazine out of me

and threw it away. You are the mistake! War should be

fought with weapons that listen to their masters!

But thats why we are in this hell, dont you understand

that? I asked.

No, I dont understand, he said. He cocked my bolt

back to seize the bullet from my chamber.

Then Ill help you, I said. Thats what Im here for.

Enough! he said and threw me into the air. I landed

somewhere on the ground, kicking up ash. I watched it fall

back down toward me and knew it would bury me forever. I

tried to scream, but I had no voice.

Death With a Conscience

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