Dealing with stress and worry. Contents of the workshop Worry Stress Assertiveness Sources of help...
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Transcript of Dealing with stress and worry. Contents of the workshop Worry Stress Assertiveness Sources of help...
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Dealing with stress and worry
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Contents of the workshop
• Worry
• Stress
• Assertiveness
• Sources of help and next steps
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Looking after ourselves
• Respect each other
• Let people speak – no interrupting
• No wrong answers
• Confidential
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What is worry?
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What is worry?
• Spending a lot of time thinking about bad things
• Being preoccupied with negative possibilities
• Fears about the future • Present concerns • Feelings about the past
• Almost everybody worries
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What things make you feel worried?
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How do you feel when worried?
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How do you feel when worried?
• Fight or flight – adrenalin
• Butterflies in stomach, headaches, feeling sick
• Sleeping problems –rumination
• Self confidence
• Obsessional behaviour
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Stress
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Depression
• waking up early, having difficulty sleeping, or sleeping more• feeling tired and lacking energy; doing less and less• not eating properly and losing or putting on weight• physical aches and pains with no physical cause• feeling low-spirited for much of the time, every day• getting no pleasure out of life or what you usually enjoy• blaming yourself and feeling unnecessarily guilty about things• lacking self-confidence and self-esteem• being preoccupied with negative thoughts• feeling numb, empty and despairing
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How to deal with worry
• Having the occasional worry is not the same as feeling worried each and every day.
• When it gets too much, what do you do?
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Tips for dealing with worry
• Writing a list – getting the worries out, or just making a plan
• Confronting your fears – fear of unknown, you might cope
• Taking action – each thought and possible action. Praise yourself
• Being assertive. Being in control
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Tips for dealing with worries
• Talking it over ….
Family
Friends
Faith
GP
Counsellor
Expert advice
• Not necessarily going to SOLVE the problem, but you feel heard,
understood and feel supported
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Cognitive Behavioural Therapy
“Focuses on the way people think and act in order to help them overcome their emotional and behavioural problems”
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CBT exercise
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Stress
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• Physical symptoms- breathlessness, headaches, fainting, chest pains, sweating, pins and
needles, high blood pressure, feeling sick, constant tiredness, sleeping problems, constipation or diarrhoea, appetite change, catching colds easily, physical symptoms heightened
• Psychological symptoms- aggressive, irritable, dreading failure, believing you are bad, losing
sense of humour, depressed, neglected, lacking interest
• Behavioural symptoms
- Difficulty making decisions, problems concentrating, denial, avoiding difficult situations
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Cortisol – fight or flight
Positive impacts • A quick burst of energy for survival reasons• Heightened memory functions• A burst of increased immunity• Lower sensitivity to pain
But…
in our current high-stress culture, the body’s stress response is activated so often that the body doesn’t always have a chance to return to normal, resulting in a state of chronic stress.
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• Impaired cognitive performance
• Lowered immunity and inflammatory responses in the body, slowed wound healing, and other health consequences
• Higher blood pressure
• Suppressed thyroid function
• Blood sugar imbalances such as hyperglycemia
• Increased abdominal fat…risks of heart disease, stroke, etc
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Reducing cortisol • Listening to music
• Massage
• Laughing, and the experience of humour
• Crying
• Mood and food – sugar, caffeine, alcohol, smoking
• Argentine tango!
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Dealing with stress and worry• Be kind to yourself
• Get organised – change what you can
• Go outside
• Confide in someone
• If it’s seriously affecting your life – see your GP
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Where to get help
• GP
• Richmond Borough Mind
• Help and information from me!
0207 1950 122 [email protected]
• Richmond AID
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Mindfulness
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Assertiveness
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What is assertiveness?
• An assertive person values him or herself and others, seeks respectful communication with others
• Yet at the same time is able to set boundaries and protect themselves from exploitation, attack and hostility
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• You can say ‘Yes’ when you mean ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ when you mean ‘No’
• You can communicate clearly to others what you are feeling and what you want from them, in a calm way
• You don’t let a fear of conflict silence you
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Why is it important?
• Development of self confidence lost through stress and worry
• If you are unable to communicate your needs, and the effect of other people’s actions on you, you can become resentful at the lost of control
• Stress, frustration and anger can follow
• YOU matter
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Aggressive, passive and assertive behaviour
• Aggressive – only your needs important, regardless of others you will get your own way
• Passive – victim mentality, avoiding conflict, not expressing opinions
• Passive-aggressive – can’t express feelings, but blame others, and sulk or behave rebelliously
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Assertive behaviour
• Assertive people claim their own space, but don’t seek to invade anyone else’s
• They don’t try to control others, nor allow others to control them• They express their opinions and ask for what they want• Look for a ‘win-win’ situation for all involved• Treats everyone with respect and time to put their views across –
including themselves
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“You can be assertive because you value yourself. You feel entitled to be here, to be who you are and to express your opinion.”
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Improving assertiveness
•Body language - Keeping a relaxed face- Facing the other person while speaking- Speaking clearly and calmly- Active listening- Matching your body language to the words you are saying
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Expressing your feelings
• Using I not You
• Avoid ‘shoulds’
• Telling someone how you feel – without accusing them
• Saying no
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Looking after yourself
• Classes• Talking treatments • Treating yourself well
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Summary
•Worry and stress•CBT, mindfulness and GP•Self help•Assertiveness and self esteem•Sources of help – GP, RB Mind