Costambar Monthly September 2012

September 2012

Yenny’s MarketLoase Resort/Sam’s BarCatamaran Beach BarBieke’s BarHappy Hippo

Supermercado TropicalRestaurant ChinoThe Meeting PlaceMady’s Bar & RestaurantCosta AtlanticaBig Lee’s Beach Bar

Chris & Mady’sOcean World Marina

Los Tres Cocos

What To Do This MonthEvent Quick Reference

Useful Telephone NumbersClassified Ads

Costambar Cable ChannelListing

The Rainy Day PageAnd Lots Of Other

Fun Stuff!!

If you can'tmake it better,

you can laugh at it.Erma Bombeck

CELEBRATING

10TERRIFIC YEARS!

That’s right! Costambar Monthly has beenentertaining the North Coast for a decade!Whew! Break out the bubbly and strike up theband!! Thanks to all our great readers andadvertisers for making this possible!

Costambar Monthly page 2

Los Tres Cocos in Las Rocas invites you to trysomething different. Fine dining at it’s best! Call809-993-4503 for details.

Sam’s at Loase Resort & Spa has new summerhours from May 1 to September 30 they will beopen Tuesday to Saturday 12 noon to 8pm andclosed Sunday & Monday.

At The Catamaran on Costambar Beach you’llfind great food at great prices enjoyed with amillion dollar view! Every day they have PowerHour with 3X1 cuba libres from 6-7pm. Startingthis month they have fresh pizza by the slice foronly RD$50 - starts daily from 6pm! They alsohold a monthly Flea Market on the last Saturdayof every month beginning at 10am. No cost tovendors!

Restaurant Chino has the best Chinese food onthe North Coast! Eat in or take out. Twolocations - on the Malecon in Puerto Plata andcalle Principal in Cabarete.

Chris & Mady’s has all your favourite sportsincluding NFL and NHL! Try their seafood andlobster specials! Watch NFL and college footballwith them this month.

The Meeting Place has started their summerhours - Monday to Friday 2pm-5:30pm. Keepchecking their website for new activitiesthroughout the season.

Big Lee’s Beach Bar on the Malecon offers freepopcorn and oldies music. Every Thursday isThirsty Thursday with your first beer costing onlyRD$50 and every Friday is drink specials all day -cuba/santo libre only RD$50 and Jose Cuervo foronly RD$100!

Bieke’s Bar - the first bar in & the last bar outof Costambar! Drop by Saturdays forCostambar’s Best Burger! Check out theblackboards for food specials during the week!Come help her celebrate!!

OPEN FROM12 NOON

CLOSED SUNDAYS

SATURDAYSBIEKE BURGERS!!

CHECK OURBOARD FOR

FOOD SPECIALS!

Happy Hippo opens a new kitchen on September1st with Chef Klaas formerly from Ocean World.On September 23rd Sonja & Klaas are holding ajoint birthday party from 3pm with live music byMelky. And mark your calendar for theirOktoberfest celebrations from October 5th-7th!

Mady’s Bar & Restaurant have a new location atcasetta #10 on the Malecon and offers you greatfood with breakfast all day! Free wi-fi available.Starting October 7th - Sunday Brunch!

Costa Atlantica, the newest community forforeign residents, offers all expats theopportunity to use their facilities. They have 2schools to learn Sky. Or why not spend the dayat their large swimming pool for only RD$200?They will also make their facilities available foractivities such as playing cards, chess, BBQ’s,yoga or exercise classes, meetings or whateverelse North Coast expats enjoy doing. Alsoenquire about their offer of one year’s free rentto take over any of their commercial facilitiessuch as hair salon, mini market, bars orrestaurants.


CostaAtlantica

Come Be Part of a New Community for Foreign Residents!

Our Best OfferAcceptance fee of US$175Plus maintenance fee

- 6 months prepaid: US$1050- unfurnished apartments- utilities not included- furnished until supplies end

Monthly Payment OptionApartments available fromUS$249-US$399 per month

- utilities not includedLuxury Ocean View apartmentsfrom US$400US-$1100 per month

- furnished or unfurnished- utilities not included

Hotel Roomsfrom US$69 per room per night24 hour electricity and security

50% discount for resident’sfamily and friends

A ONE OF A KIND LIFESTYLEOn The Malecon in Puerto Plata

809-586-4243www.puertoplatabeachclub.com


COME FOR THE GREAT FOODAT GREAT PRICES AND THE

MILLION DOLLAR VIEW!

FLEA MARKET!!!EVERY LAST SATURDAY OF THE MONTH

FREE TO VENDORS!Starting at 10am

PIZZA SLICES ONLY RD$50!!!DAILY STARTING AT 6PMNEW!!

When you are feeling nostalgic come to…‘Play It Again’

Much of What You Loved About Sam’s In Costambar!

At Loase

VILLA FOR RENTBY THE WEEK

CASA OBEARINF: 809-837-6845www.casaloase.com

THIS MONTH’S REDNECKDIY PROJECT!

BEST HEDGE TRIMMEREVER!!!


NEW LOCATION!Casetta #10

Malecon, Puerto Plata

Burgers, Chicken, Fish, Breakfast ALL DAY & so much more!Daily Lunch Specials!

Free WI-FIBar & Restaurant Open at 10am to ???

Starting October 7th - SUNDAY BRUNCH!!

At St. Peter's Catholic Church in Toronto, theyhave weekly husbands' marriage seminars.At the session last week, the priest askedGiuseppe, who said he was approaching his 50thwedding anniversary, to take a few minutes andshare some insight into how he had managed tostay married to the same woman all these years.Giuseppe replied to the assembled husbands,'Wella, I'va tried to treat her nicea, spenda damoney on her, but besta of all is, I tooka her toItaly for the 25th anniversary!'The priest responded, 'Giuseppe, you are anamazing inspiration to all the husbands here!Please tell us what you are planning for your wifefor your 50th anniversary?'Giuseppe proudly replied, "I gonna go pick her up."


Restaurant ChinoBest Chinese Food Onthe North Coast! TwoGreat Locations! EatIn or Takeout!Xiang Wan JiaPlaza Neptuno, Malecon, Puerto Plata809-261-5609Calle Principal, Cabarete809-571-0385

DINNER WITH THE GIRLSA group of 15-year-old girlfriends discussed whereto meet for dinner. Finally, they agreed to meet atthe Dairy Queen, next door to the Ocean Viewrestaurant, because they had only $6.00 amongthem and Brad Johnson, the cute boy in SocialStudies, lived on that street.10 years later, the group of 25-year-old girlfriendsdiscussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, theyagreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant,because the beer was cheap, the restaurant offeredfree snacks, the band was good, there was nocover charge, and there were lots of cute guys.10 years later, the group of 35-year-old girlfriendsdiscussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, theyagreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant,because the cosmos were good, it was right nearthe gym and, if they went late enough, therewouldn't be too many whiny little kids.10 years later, the group of 45-year-old girlfriendsdiscussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, theyagreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant,because the martinis were big, and the waiterswore tight pants and had nice buns.10 years later, the group of 55-year-old girlfriendsdiscussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, theyagreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant,because the prices were reasonable, the wine listwas good, the restaurant had windows thatopened (in case of hot flashes), and they servedfish which is good for your cholesterol.10 years later, the group of 65-year-old girlfriendsdiscussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, theyagreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant,because the lighting was good, and the restauranthad a senior citizen discounts.10 years later, the group of 75-year-old girlfriendsdiscussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, theyagreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant,because the food was not too spicy, and therestaurant was handicapped-accessible.10 years later, the group of 85-year-old girlfriendsdiscussed where to meet for dinner. Finally, theyagreed to meet at the Ocean View restaurant,because they had never been there before.


INTERNATIONAL GOURMETCUISINE

&AUSTRIAN SPECIALTIES

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of aCatholic elementary school for lunch. At thehead of the table was a large pile of apples. Thenun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:'Take only ONE . God is watching.'Moving further along the lunch line, at theother end of the table was a large pile ofchocolate chip cookies.A child had written a note, 'Take all you want.God is watching the apples.'

NASA’s robot Curiositylanded on Mars. Earlypictures show no signs ofESPN, beer or porn. Thismakes it very clear thatmen are not from Mars.

NEW FOR SENIOR TRAVEL!


CHRIS & MADY’SPlaya Cofresi

WATCH THE NFL AND COLLEGEFOOTBALL GAMES WITH US!!

Spend today at Big Lee’s Beach Bar

Open at 10 a.m.Bar open until midnight

ALL DAY DRINK SPECIALS!!!Cuba/Santo Libres RD$50

Jose Cuervo RD$100

Every Thursday isTHIRSTY THURSDAY!!

Your 1st Beer is ONLY RD$50!!Every Friday is

Those of us who spend much time in a doctor'soffice should appreciate this! Doesn't it seem moreand more that physicians are running theirpractices like an assembly line?Here's what happened to Kevin:Kevin walked into a doctor's office and thereceptionist asked him what he had. Kevin said:'Shingles.' So she wrote down his name, address,medical insurance number and told him to have aseat.Fifteen minutes later a nurse's aide came out andasked Kevin what he had...Kevin said, 'Shingles.' So she wrote down hisheight, weight, a complete medical history and toldKevin to wait in the examining room.A half hour later a nurse came in and asked Kevinwhat he had. Kevin said, 'Shingles..' So the nursegave Kevin a blood test, a blood pressure test, anelectrocardiogram, and told Kevin to take off all hisclothes and wait for the doctor.An hour later the doctor came in and found Kevinsitting patiently in the nude and asked Kevin whathe had.Kevin said, 'Shingles.'The doctor asked, 'Where?'Kevin said, 'Outside on the truck. Where do youwant me to unload 'em??'

The Sheriff pulled up next to the guyunloading garbage out of his pick-up intothe ditch. The Sheriff asked, "Why are youdumping garbage in the ditch? Don't yousee that sign right over your head.""Yep," he replied. "That's why I'm dumpin' ithere, 'cause it says: 'Fine For DumpingGarbage.' "


DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters:DIRTY ROOMPRESBYTERIAN: When you rearrange the letters:BEST IN PRAYERASTRONOMER: When you rearrange the letters:MOON STARERDESPERATION: When you rearrange the letters: AROPE ENDS ITTHE EYES: ! When you rearrange the letters: THEYSEEGEORGE BUSH: When you rearrange the letters:HE BUGS GORETHE MORSE CODE : When you rearrange theletters: HERE COME DOTSSLOT MACHINES: When you rearrange the letters:CASH LOST IN MEANIMOSITY: When you rearrange the letters: IS NOAMITYELECTION RESULTS: When you rearrange theletters: LIES - LET'S RECOUNTSNOOZE ALARMS: When you rearrange theletters: ALAS! NO MORE Z 'SA DECIMAL POINT: When you rearrange theletters: IM A DOT IN PLACETHE EARTHQUAKES: When you rearrange theletters: THAT QUEER SHAKEELEVEN PLUS TWO: When you rearrange theletters: TWELVE PLUS ONEAND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:MOTHER-IN-LAW: When you rearrange the letters:WOMAN HITLER

A few minutes before the church services started,the congregation were sitting in their pews andtalking. Suddenly, Satan appeared at the front ofthe church. Everyone started screaming andrunning for the entrance, trampling each other in afrantic effort to get away from evil incarnate. Soonthe church was empty except for one elderlygentleman who sat calmly in his pew withoutmoving, seemingly oblivious to the fact that God'sultimate enemy was in his presence..So Satan walked up to the man and said, 'Do youknow who I am?'The man replied, 'Yep, sure do.''Aren't you afraid of me?' Satan asked.'Nope, sure ain't.' said the man.'Don't you realize I can kill you with one word?'asked Satan.'Don't doubt it for a minute,' returned the old man,in an even tone.'Did you know that I can cause you profound,horrifying AGONY for all eternity?' persistedSatan.'Yep,' was the calm reply.'And you are still not afraid?' asked Satan.'Nope,' said the old manMore than a little perturbed, Satan asked, 'Whyaren't you afraid of me?'The man calmly replied, 'Been married to yoursister for 48 years.’

Sometimes I feel likeThrowing in the towelBut you know what that

Means…More laundry!!


JUST ARRIVED!CLEAR FIBERGLASS

7 GALLONPROPANE CYLINDER TANK24” TALL & 12” DIAMETER

Always know how much gasyou have!

Lighter than steel & rustproof!

ONLY RD$2500CALL COLIN AT 809-449-1819

CHARTS AVAILABLEGet your

nautical charts of theBahamas, Turks and Caicos Islands,

Providenciales and HispaniolaFrom

Rosa at Luperon Swap MeetWendy’s Bar in Luperon

Ocean World Marina in Cofresi

If you have difficulty callColin at 809-449-1819

THE EARLYBIRD CANHAVE THEWORM,‘CAUSE

MORNINGSAND WORMS

SUCK!


SOLUTIONS ON PAGE 13SUDOKU PUZZLESFill in the missing numbers so every row, column andquadrant contains the number 1 through 9.

CANDY

Across1. Reciprocal5. Defeat6. Feed7. Himalayan mountDown1. Infuriate2. Speculation3. Mundane4. Hearing distance

Find and circle all of the words that are hidden in the grid.The remaining letters spell a hidden message

ALMOND JOYBABY RUTHBAZOOKA GUMBOTTLECAPSBUBBLE YUMBUTTERFINGERSCANDYNECKLACECHICLETSCHUCKLESCLARK BARCOFFEE CRISP

CRACKER JACKDUBBLE BUBBLEGOOBERSGUMMI BEARSHERSHEY KISSESHUBBA BUBBAGUMJAW BREAKERSJUJUBESKIT KATLEMON DROPSLICORICE PIPE

LIFESAVERSLOLLIPOPSMILK DUDSMILKY WAYMOUNDSNECCO WAFERSOH HENRYPEPPERMINTPATTYPEZPOP ROCKSPUMPKIN SEEDS

RED HOTSSEN-SENSLO-POKESSMARTIESSOUR BALLSSPEARMINTLEAVESSWEETARTSTOOTSIE ROLLSTWIXTWIZZLERSWAX LIPS


Police Office 809-320-8510

Police Car 809-320-8840

APC Office 809-970-7877

APC Gate Security 809-970-7015

Codetel 809-220-1111

Edenorte - emergency 809-261-1844

Edenorte - office 809-586-9823

Costambar Taxi Stand 809-970-7318

Canada 809-586-5761

Britain 809-586-4244

U.S.A. 809-586-4204

German 809-586-6995

Italian 809-320-7601

Clinica Bournigal 809-586-2342

Clinica Brugal 809-586-2519

Los Tropicos Pharmacy 809-970-7607

12 CNN 51 CINE CANAL

22 FOX SPORT 56 SPEED

28 BOOMERANG 57 ANIMAL PLANET

30 ABC 64 SCI-FI

31 NBC 66 FOOD

32 CBS 69 DISCOVERYKIDS

33 TBS 70 WEATHER

34 CNBC 71 CINEMAX

35 ESPN-1 72 SHOWTIME

36 WGN 74 STARZ

37 CDN 79 NASA

40 TNT 80 JETIX

42 USA 81 CARTOON

43 ESPN-2 83 TNT LA

44 DISCOVERY 84 HISTORY

46 DISNEY 85 THE FILM ZONE

49 HBO


BEGINNER INTERMEDIATE

HIDDEN MESSAGEJelly Belly Jelly Beans were

a favourite candy ofPresident Ronald Reagan

The author is available every Sunday at 5pm at The CatamaranRestaurant on Costambar Beach to discuss his program andanswer any questions. Books are available to purchase.

More Info at www.ramilife.com

RamiLife - Way to Inner Happiness

SPECIAL OFFER!BOOK“My Way to Inner Happiness”Regular Price RD$900DVDWith Yoga, Edukinensthetik& Qi GongRegular Price RD$900

DURING THE MONTH OF SEPTEMBERBook & DVD together for only RD$900!


Massage: Relax, Reduction, Deep Tissue, Facial Massage, Reflexology,Acupressure, & Hot StonePhysical Therapy, Paraffin Treatment & Lymphatic DrainageManicure & Pedicure: Regular & IntensiveBraids & Hair Extensions & Mens HaircutsFacials, Waxing , Peeling, Hydration & Nurse ServicesNatural Health & Beauty ProductsASK ABOUT OUR SPECIALS.Open Mon-Sat from 9:00am / Sundays by appointmentService to the home. Transportation available.#14 Penon St, Costambar Tel: 809-970-7522 Cell: 809-993-2944

RD$955 Includes DentalRD$1190 with Drugs

Aquacero, Malecon, Puerto Plata 5pmBieke’s Bar, Costambar 6:30pmOr call Petra & Marcel Bahr1-809-885-2155

A mother was working in the kitchen, listening toher five-year-old son playing with his new electrictrain set in the living room.She heard the train stop and her son saying, 'Allof You B*****ds who want off, get the f**k offnow, cause we're in a hurry! And all of youB*****ds who are getting on, get the f**k on, causewe're going down the tracks'.The horrified mother went in and told her son, 'Wedon't use that kind of language in this house. NowI want you to go to your room and stay there forTWO HOURS. When you come out, you may playwith your train, but I want you to use nicelanguage.'Two hours later, the son came out of the bedroomand resumed playing with his train. Soon the trainstopped and the mother heard her son say, 'Allpassengers who are disembarking the train, pleaseremember to take all of your belongings with you.We thank you for travelling with us today andhope your trip was a pleasant one.'She hears the little boy continue,'For those of you just boarding, we ask you tostow all of your hand luggage under your seat.Remember, there is no smoking on the train.We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxingjourney with us today.'As the mother began to smile, the child added..........'For those of you who are pissed off about theTWO HOUR delay, please see the fat bitch in thekitchen.'

I miss those days when you couldthrow Someone in the water without

Worrying about their cellphone!


OPEN DAILY (INCLUDING HOLIDAYS)Mon-Sat 8am-10pm Sundays 8am-8pm

Everything you need from snacks to supper!Delivery Service Available!

Calle Principal, Costambar (just inside the gate)809-970-3028

A new priest at his first mass was so nervous hecould hardly speak.After mass he asked the monsignor how he haddone.The monsignor replied, 'When I am worried aboutgetting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass ofvodka next to the water glass. If I start to getnervous, I take a sip.'So next Sunday he took the monsignor's advice.At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervousand took a drink.He proceeded to talk up a storm.Upon his return to his office after the mass, hefound the following note on the door:1) Sip the vodka, don't gulp.2) There are 10 commandments, not 12.3) There are 12 disciples, not 10.4) Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.5) Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet hisass.6) We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.7) The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referredto as Big Daddy, Junior and the spook.8) David slew Goliath; he did not kick the shit outof him.9) When David was hit by a rock and was knockedoff his donkey, don't say he was stoned off his ass.10)We do not refer to the cross as the 'Big T.'11)When Jesus broke the bread at the last supperhe said, 'Take this and eat it for it is my body.' Hedid not say 'Eat me'.12)The Virgin Mary is not called 'Mary with theCherry'.13)The recommended grace before a meal is not:Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, Yeah God.14)Next Sunday there will be a taffy pullingcontest at St. Peter's not a peter pulling contest atSt. Taffy's.

A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintingsfrom the Louvre.After careful planning, he got past security, stolethe paintings, and made it safely to his van.However, he was captured only two blocks awaywhen his van ran out of gas.When asked how he could mastermind such acrime and then make such an obvious error, hereplied,'Monsieur, that is the reason I stole the paintings.'I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the VanGogh.'See if you have De Gaulle to show this to someoneelse.I printed it because I figured I had nothingToulouse.


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SOUND RENTAL

It is important for men to remember that, as women growolder, it becomes harder for them to maintain the samequality of housekeeping as when they were younger. Whenyou notice this, try not to shout at them. Some are over-sensitive and there's nothing worse than an over-sensitivewoman.My name is Ron. Let me relate how I handled the situationwith my wife, Julie. When I took early retirement last year,it became necessary for Julie to get a full-time job for theextra income that we need. Shortly after she startedworking, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. Inow usually get home from the pub about the same timeshe gets home from work. Although she knows howhungry I am, she nearly always says she has to rest for halfan hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't shout at her,instead I tell her to take her time and just wake me whenshe gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch at thepub so eating out again is out of the question; I'm ready forsome home cooked food when I get in. She used to do thedishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's usual forthem to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I dowhat I can by diplomatically reminding her several timeseach evening that they won't clean themselves. I know shereally appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her toget them done before she goes to bed. Another symptom ofageing is complaining. For example, she will say that it isdifficult for her to do the shopping during her lunch hour.But we take them for better or worse, so I just smile andoffer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two oreven three days. That way she won't have to rush so much.I also remind her that missing lunch completely now andthen won't hurt her. I like to think tact is one of my strongpoints. When doing simple jobs, she seems to think sheneeds more rest periods. She has to take a rest when shehas only half finished mowing the lawn and several extrabreaks when she's vacuuming through the house. It doesannoy me, vacuuming when I'm trying to watch 'Match ofthe Day', but I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tellher to make herself a nice cup of tea and just sit for awhile, and as long as she is making one for herself, she mayas well make one for me too. I know that I probably looklike a saint in the way I support Julie. I'm not saying thatshowing this much consideration is easy. Many men willfind it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knowsbetter than I do how frustrating women get as they getolder. However, even if you just use a little more tact andless criticism of your ageing wife because of this article, Iwill consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all,we are put on this earth to help each other.EDITOR'S NOTE:Ron died suddenly last week. He was found with a 24-inchStanley screwdriver rammed up his arse with only 2 inchesshowing. His wife Julie was arrested, but the all-womanjury accepted her defense that he accidentally sat on it.


AGUA EXPRESS1 Truck RD$350 2 Trucks RD$600

Office: 809-970-3547

VIVERO MAIMONGREEN THUMB

Landscaping and Gardening Maintenance Services

Palms, Flowering and Foliage PlantsBEST PRICES ON THE NORTH COAST!!!

OPENMonday to Friday 8am-5pm

Saturday 8am-noon

George Roesch809-543-8041 Km 11

Carretera PP-ImbertJust past

‘The Fish Places’

I went fishing this morning but after a short time Iran out of worms. Then I saw a cottonmouth witha frog in his mouth. Frogs are good bass bait.Knowing the snake couldn't bite me with the frogin his mouth I grabbed him right behind the head,took the frog, and put it in my bait bucket.Now the dilemma was how to release the snakewithout getting bit. So, I grabbed my bottle of JackDaniels and poured a little whiskey in its mouth.His eyes rolled back, he went limp. I released himinto the lake without incident and carried onfishing using the frog.A little later, I felt a nudge on my foot. There wasthat same snake with two frogs in his mouth.


FOR SALE33foot sailboat, Glander Tava-na class yawl, good condition/minor work needed, less than1500 hours on new 20 horseKuboto engine and trans. AMUST SEE!Located in Luperon bay. CallSean @ (809) 782-2534.

Costambar Monthly classified ads are free but can only beplaced by emailing [email protected] calling 809-970-7507 or 809-449-1820PLEASE NOTE - free classified ads are only for personal items.Commercial properties or enterprises (including realestate sales or rentals) must purchase an ad. Classifieds willusually be run for one month only unless we are otherwisenotified.

IGLESIA FILIPOS PRESBITERIANA invites you toservices every Sunday at 10 A.M. Worships are inSpanish. Children activities. Before Costambar GateSecurity, turn on the right side toward the powerplant, 100 meters on the right side.

WANTED"Karaoke business looking foran assistant with experiencesas a DJ. Dominican welcome!for contacts call 809 988 1322after 2.30 PM."

FOR SALEDewaltDrill/Driver/Hammerdrill 18V Cordless. Industrystandard. Very good shape, butattractive case was stolen.Charger and two good Li-ionbatteries included for less thanhalf of purchase price at 6,000pesos FIRM. Chris 829-931-8094

FOR SALEBlu-Ray DVD Player. This isdeluxe! LG model 590Cconnects to your wi-fi, hasbuilt-in 250 GB memory foryour movies and music! USBconnection. Like new, in box-w- manuals and cd for the wi-fi connection to yourcomputer. 12,000 pesos o.b.o,call Chris in Puerto Plata @829-931-8094.

FREE TO A GOOD HOMEMaity is a 6 year old femalewho has been fixed and hasrecent shots. Really sweet,well-behaved dog. Needs ahome with lots of love but haslots of love to give!Call 809-988-1322 afternoonsor evenings

FOR SALEFord F-150 V-8 4.6l runs ongasoline but has gas installed,year '98, engine 2007,very well taken care of byowner!!Also known as "the big yellowmonster"$13,000usd obo!!Call Vik 829 864 9420

FOR SALE1980 Pearson 365 Sloop. Greatcruising boat, Westerbeke40hp, refrigerator, good sails.Priced to sell. US$24,900.Call 829-338-3188

LIKE CHECKING OUT THE CLASSIFIEDS FOR GREAT DEALS? ORUSING THEM TO GET RID OF YOUR UNWANTED ITEMS? THENWHY NOT CHECK OUT COSTAMBAR’S FLEA MARKET AT THECATAMARAN BAR ON THE BEACH. EVERY LAST SATURDAY OFTHE MONTH STARTING AT 10AM! FREE TO VENDORS!!

CLASSIFIEDS

FOR SALEGarmin GPS, model 255w, withSD card for DominicanRepublic. Preloaded withCanada/ U.S. and Puerto Rico.Hardly used, in box 3,500pesos o.b.o. Chris 829-931-8094.

FOR SALEVizio 22" LED LCD HDTV.Flatscreen. 1080 dpi. 2 HDMIinputs. Only 3/4" of an inchthin! Like new, in box -w-manuals. 8,000 pesos o.n.o.,Chris 829-931-8094.

FOR SALEAmana fan/dehumidifier/airconditioner. Portable, wheel itfrom room to room! Runsquiet and works well. Perhapsthe best thing I ever bought.Beige. 12,000 pesos o.b.o.,Chris 829-931-8094.

FOR SALEKitchenaid Stand Mixer. Black.Ultra Power model, 300 watts.Flat beater, dough hook, andwire wisk, but manyattachments are available.Good for 'foodie' orrestaurant! Hardly used, in boxwith manuals and recipe book.Won't be sad if it doesn't sell.10,000 pesos o.b.o, Chris 829-931-8094.

FOR SALEStanley socket set in case. 1/4,3/8 and half inch drive. Metricand standard. Regular anddeep sockets, all in both 6 and12 point!!!! Wow. In blackchrome! With a half dozenratcheting box-end wrenches,extensions, torx and allen bits,etc. Very nice. New. In case,5,000 pesos FIRM. Chris 829-931-8094.

FOR SALEImpressive chefs knife set inlocking attache case. Stainless.Includes shears, sharpeningsteel, cleaver, tranchelard; allthe tools of the trade!Memorable gift, or kick off thenext BBQ with panache! New,but used a couple of steakknives and forks one night. Allthe rest is still wrapped. 3500pesos FIRM. Chris 829-931-8094.

FOR SALEZantrex C35 Multifunctionsolar/wind charge controller,one year old 65 Usd.Technomaster pure sinewaveinverter 2000watts with3000watts maximum, I yearold, still under guarantee20,000 pesos.Two 65 watt solar panels, 6months old, 130 USD. Tel 809970 32 87 or 809 639 9393.email: [email protected].

CCM Mountain bike. 18 speed.18" frame. Telescopic fork.Good shape, but clearly used.Ridden regularly andmaintained. Tires are good.Brakes are good. Sidestand.Presentable. Bought it for 5000pesos and its much better now.4000 pesos o.b.o. Chris 829-931-8094.

FOR SALEDining Table Set, Mahogany,square table, 8 chairs,Beautiful! RD$75,000Living room set, 6 pieces ,Mahogany RD$70,000Hyundai Starex 2001, Ninepassengers, Diessel ,Automatic.More info: 809-709-0360 ;[email protected]

FOR SALEWhirlpool Gold fridge freezerin stainless steel, water cooler,ice maker, etc same fridge in LaSirena is RD$105,000, our price14 months old RD$55,000tel 829 728 6201


WEST COSTAMBAR LAND FOR SALE

One lot from beachfront at the end ofCalle Guarionex beside Casa Blanca

bungalow. The property is on theCofresi side of west Costambar. The

land is 600 square meters with fruit andmature palm trees. The seller has been

motivated to sell due to the airlinescancelling of direct flights from Western

Canada.ASKING PRICE OF US$41,750

OFFERS CONSIDERED

There is a full set of architect plans for amodest beach house available for an

extra fee. Legal title is on file.Please contact Colin in Costambar @

809-449-1819Or Ted Hughes / owner @

[email protected]

A man walks into a restaurant with a full-grownostrich behind him. The waitress asks them fortheir orders.The man says, 'A hamburger, fries and a coke,'and turns to the ostrich, 'What's yours?''I'll have the same,' says the ostrich.A short time later the waitress returns with theorder 'That will be $9.40 please,' and the manreaches into his pocket and pulls out the exactchange for payment.The next day, the man and the ostrich comeagainand the man says, 'A hamburger, fries, and acoke.'The ostrich says, 'I'll have the same.'Again the man reaches into his pocket and payswith exact change.This becomes routine until the two enter again.'The usual?' asks the waitress.'No, this is Friday night, so I will have a steak,baked potato and a salad,' says the man.'Same,' says the ostrich.Shortly the waitress brings the order and says,'That will be $32.62.'Once again the man pulls the exact change out ofhis pocket and places it on the table. Thewaitress cannot hold back her curiosity anylonger. 'Excuse me, sir. How do you manage toalways come up with the exact change in yourpocket every time?''Well,' says the man, 'several years ago I wascleaning the attic and found an old lamp. When Irubbed it, a Genie appeared and offered me twowishes. My first wish was that if I ever had topay for anything, I would just put my hand in mypocket and the right amount of money wouldalways be there.''That's brilliant!' says the waitress. 'Most peoplewould ask for a million dollars or something, butyou'll always be as rich as you want for as longas you live!''That's right. Whether it's a gallon of milk or aRolls Royce, the exact money is always there,'says the man.The waitress asks, 'What's with the ostrich?'The man sighs, pauses and answers, 'My secondwish was for a tall chick with a big butt and longlegs who agrees with everything I say.'


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Costambar Monthly September 2012

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Transcript of Costambar Monthly September 2012