CONFLICT MGT

EMPOWERING YOUR PROFESSIONAL LIFE

1. Turning conflict into progress

2. Avoiding negative conflict3. Neutralizing negative

conflict

PRO SUCCESS TOOLSThe fact-feeling dialectic

Conflict = f(human selfishness)

Conflict has human causes & requires human

solutions

CONFLICT ARE US1. Corporate downsizing, temp

employee, & outsourcing practices

2. Business policies for open carry customers

3. BU vs. the independent alumni association

4. Revolt of the 5 “power” conferences against the NCAA

5. NFL responsibility for past player concussion damage claims

HOT vs. COOL CONFLICT

COOLcon = INTELLECTUAL point of view: info-facts, thoughts, reasoning, friendly debate, the future

HOTcon = personalities, emotions, agendas, feuds, grudges, insults, the past

The #1 goal of conflict containment is to convert hot

conflict into cool.

GENDER BENDER

• In general, males seek to resolve conflict via competition: win vs. lose•Females prefer cooperation: win-win

The toughest challenge of conflict management is accurately defining the type of conflict at hand—a non-exact requiring 360 feedback from others.

Strive to neutralize or resolve org conflicts through achieving a good fit between management style and situational workplace circumstances.

GENERIC CONFLICT MANAGEMENT STYLES (2A3C)

1. Accommodating →2. Avoiding →3. Collaborating →4. Competing →5. Compromising →

1. Use when you can’t win2. Use to buy time to fight

another day3. Use when neither party can

win without cooperation4. Use when unpopular action

(win-lose) is the only alternative

5. Use when each side has equal power

FACT-FEELING DIALECTIC

Conflict issues won’t be resolved if they short-

circuit full human wiring (intellect + emotions)

Conflict resolution via the FACT-FEELING

DIALECTIC

Matadors use the cape to protect themselves from the bull, who thinks the

cape is part of the matador.

The F-F dialectic is a simple strategy for neutralizing (a la the matador’s cape) or resolving interpersonal conflict through facilitating a dialogue that alternates between sharing facts (cool conflict objective information) and feelings (hot conflict subjective emotions).factsFEELINGSfactsFEELINGS

Entrees & Primers• What do you know

about…” (fact)• “How does that make you

feel?” (feeling)• “What do you think we

should do?” (fact)• “What’s your reaction to

what Steve just said?” (feeling)

Achieving cooperation by synthesizing the win-lose dichotomy of thesis (one point of view) & antithesis (a second, conflicting, POV) into a win-win synthesis of a creative & agreeable third position.

Thesis: Employee pay raise (stable paycheck)Antithesis: Pay cut (stable paycheck)Synthesis: Commission or bonus pay (variable paycheck )Thesis: 8:00 a.m. classAntithesis: Evening classSynthesis: Online class

Thesis: Construct a new office buildingAntithesis: Stick with the old buildingSynthesis 1: Renovate the old buildingSynthesis 2: Keep the old building as location A + buy/rennovate adjacent building as location B

Thesis: Reform the NCAAAntithesis: Abolish the NCAA for the “power conferences” Synthesis 1: Let the PCs regulate themselvesSynthesis 2: Make college football, basketball, & baseball “minor league” pro teams

OTHER CONFLICT RESOLUTION IDEAS

1. Help employees realize that feelings usually change over time.

2. Delay decision-making until emotions have settled down.

3. Strive to generate good feelings about HOW decisions are made.

EXAM

Can’t win: ACCOMODATION

•NCAA erosion of power vs. the “Power 5” conferences•Augusta (Masters Tournament) country club admission of women members

Create time to power up: AVOIDANCE

•Republican party vs. “Obamacare”•US Postal Service & Social Security operations deficits

Can’t win without cooperating: COLLABORATION

•Mandatory immunizations for measles control vs. citizen rights•Bill collection agencies negotiating with debtors

Win-lose conflict: COMPETITION

•Cars & feed lots vs. global warming•National Rifle Association/open carry vs. gun control