Conflict Magazine - Charlotte
-
Upload
jaytrevaskis -
Category
Documents
-
view
218 -
download
0
Transcript of Conflict Magazine - Charlotte
8/8/2019 Conflict Magazine - Charlotte
http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/conflict-magazine-charlotte 1/7
A LL
BOUT
CONFLICT
DO YOU WANT TO SEEK
INFORMATION ABOUT CONFLICT
AND HOW YOU CAN RESOLVE IT?
DO YOU WANT TO HEAR OTHER
PEOPLES CONFLICT STORIES?
DO YOU NEED HELP WITH YOUR
CONFLICT RESOLVING
THEN THIS IS THE MAGAZINE FOR
YOU!
AUS $3.99 ISSUE NO.1
By Charlotte Aitken
8/8/2019 Conflict Magazine - Charlotte
http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/conflict-magazine-charlotte 2/7
Definition:
A CONFLICT is a situation between
two or more people in which one
person sees that another person is
wrong about something that the
first person cares about. If you simply disagree with
something that another person
says, this is not a conflict, just a
disagreement.
A conflict doesn't exist unless both
people significantly care about theissue, and believe that the other
person will do something that has
a negative impact on their life
It is the emotions that this
situation creates that make
conflict so unpleasant- things like
anger, sadness, betrayal.
However, conflict is a normal partof life and cannot and should not
be avoided entirely. In fact,
learning skills to handle it in a
calm and respectful way, means
that differences can lead to
understanding other perspectives
as well as creative problem
solving. So read more.........
WHAT IS...
CONFLICT
8/8/2019 Conflict Magazine - Charlotte
http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/conflict-magazine-charlotte 3/7
CONFLICT OFTEN OCCURS
THROUGH PARENTS: Many
people would have grown uphearing their parents argue, so
are confronted with it from an
early age.
EVEN THE TEACHERS
EXPERIENCE CONFLICT:
Even the people you look up toand see nearly everyday have
conflict with their work partners
and others they are close to.
THE BEST THING: Resolving
conflict is a life skill, and when
you know how to do it, it canmake your life a whole lot easier
in the long run. The only hard
part is learning how to resolve it!
onflict occurs because everyone in the world is different. You are
an individual and no-one in the universe will think the exact things
that you think or have the exact same opinions as you! However,part of being human is that we assume that we are right and we often
want people to think the same as us! We can take it personally or feel
threatened when they don’t. So conflicts happen to us often, until we learn
to compromise and influence each other in healthy ways.
Many children in this generation grow up seeing their parents, friends
and relatives fight and not resolve it in the best way. This is not helpful, as
when they grow up, they are more likely to not resolve conflict well, andneed to learn new skills of conflict resolution.
Sometimes the old saying, “You should never discuss politics, religion, or
money” can be very true. These are considered "hot topics," things that
most people are passionate about and if you disagree it could cause an
argument or dispute. Feeling very strongly about something often
prevents people from being open to new ideas, so choose
your battles wisely!
Experts say that it is not only what you say but how you
say it that is important, as an aggressive tone or body
language can be very threatening and cause a fight.
C
WHY DOES IT OCCUR?
8/8/2019 Conflict Magazine - Charlotte
http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/conflict-magazine-charlotte 4/7
IN CONFLICT, you can make people really angry or upset without even
knowing it, so it is important to acknowledge other people’s feelings. By
noticing the emotions of the other person, you will be able to put yourself
in his or her shoes, which helps you to understand his or her point of
view. Sometimes the other person just feeling that you ‘get’ them, andunderstand their point, is all it takes to be reconciled.
It is important to realize that people do not always react the same way
that you would to a situation and so you need to be careful to try and not
provoke them.
Anger is a normal emotion, but it is important to learn how to handle it
so you do not hurt others. Simply saying “I am feeling angry” is a start!
Violence should never be a solution to any conflict or argument as it does
not solve anything and always makes things worse.
FEELINGS IN
CONFLICT
8/8/2019 Conflict Magazine - Charlotte
http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/conflict-magazine-charlotte 5/7
There are 4 main steps that you can take ....
1. THINK FIRST
You need to define the problem and get it clear into
your head what is happening.
Brainstorm ideas on what you could do and think of
the consequences that each idea might result in.
Talk through your ideas with an adult if you need help of just
want an opinion on what you should do. There are teachers, counselors
and parents who may have experience and advice on the issue.
Realise that you may get angry when you talk to the person, so planahead the different ways that you can calm yourself down. Some
examples are count to 10 before you say anything you will regret and
breathe slow and deep breaths to calm down.
2. WHAT NOT TO DO
There is an easy way to remember the things NOT to do - WAD!
W - withdraw or distance yourself and ignore the issue.
A - attack and say things like, “You are such a ...You did this...You were...”
Never call them names, threaten them, or bring violence into the matter.
D - defend your own position and not listen to the other person
3. WHAT TO DO
Give them the benefit and doubt - “You may not mean it like this...”
Use an ‘I’ position - “When you do this, I feel upset”
Invite their views into the discussion - “What do you think?”
Really listen and feed back that you hear their opinion.
Stay calm and thoughtful as your speaking.
4. KNOW that you can’t control their response or the outcome, but try
to act so you can go to bed that night feeling proud of how you handled it!
What can we do to resolve conflict?
8/8/2019 Conflict Magazine - Charlotte
http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/conflict-magazine-charlotte 6/7
IT WORKED FOR ME!
Name: Shawn Tack
Age: 18
My Story: I had a great
group of friends, supportive
family, and my grades wereokay I guess. I pretty much
liked everything in my life,
except for my rugby team.
My coach picked on me for
the whole season and I
hated him! One day after
training I confronted him,
and told him straight up
that I did not like the way
he was treating me. He was
so shocked that he just
yelled at me saying that if I
wanted to find a new coach,
then that was fine by him. I
told my dad about it later,
and he suggested to go onto
the internet and look at
what to do. I found some
websites, and the next day I
did what it told me to do,
and it worked! He said he
was sorry and he would try
to be a better coach. It just
shows that if you do the
r i g h t t h i n g s , c o n fl i c t
resolution can be easy!
Tanya’s story
Name: Tanya Pitt
Age: 19
Story: When I was in highschool, I had a really great
group of friends. We were
all close and told each other
everything. Then one day a
new girl came and sort of
floated over to our group.
All of a sudden the girls
started to one by one
change into really mean
and back stabbing girls. I
knew this was happening
and so I tried to stop them
from changing, but they all
denied it.
Then they started a rumor
about me throughout the
s c h o o l a n d e v e r y o n e
s t a r t e d t o t r e a t m e
differently. I hated school
then on.
My parents started tonotice a difference in my
behaviour and sent me to a
psychologist who was great.
She helped me through all
my emotions and how I
could resolve this conflict.
The next couple weeks were
still hard at school, but I
found a group of better girls
who treated me like a real
person with emotions.
I encourage anyone who is
struggling with conflict and
wants to resolve it that
there is plenty of help out
there and you can do it!
Tanya
Helpful Stories
Name: Sarah Hon
Age: 17
Her conflict story: I was 12
years old and my parents were
divorced, My dad had moved off
to America to start fresh there. I
didn’t mind it that much, as Icould go to America or Australia
whenever I wanted to. I chose to
live with him in his house where
he had a girlfriend, who was
really nice to me. It was the first
week of year 7 at my new high
schoo l, and I didn’t know
anyone. I was so scared that day
that I didn’t talk to anyone. WhenI got home my dad asked me if I
had made any friends. I told him
about my day and he got really
angry at me for not giving it a
go. The next day the same thing
happened. I hated him for making
me go to a new school, and
fought with him all the way
through that night. Then hisgirlfriend came up to me and
said some words that really
encouraged me. She told me of
how she started a new high
school when she was my age, and
how she noticed that if you take
the initiative and go up to talk to
people that it isn’t that scary at
all. I resolved the conflict with
my dad and the next day I had a
whole group of new friends!
Sarah
ABOUT ME
8/8/2019 Conflict Magazine - Charlotte
http://slidepdf.com/reader/full/conflict-magazine-charlotte 7/7
WHERE CAN YOU GO TO FIND HELP?
There are various networks, helplines and people who you can go to if you
need help with your situation. You can talk to counselors, psychologists, and
people on the kids helpline, as they are professionals and will know wha t to doin your story . Websites and Networks ha ve information on the matter, and it
would be one of the easiest places you can go to if you are in desperate need.
Mums and Dads also have great ideas on how to
resolve conflict if it is at school, as they have
been through school and even if it was a VERY
long time ago, they still had the same problems
as you do now days!
Here is the list of the people and places where
you can go if you need help to resolve your
conflict situation.
Need Help?
1. Conflict Resolution Network
2. Kids Helpline
3. Counselors
4. Mum and Dad
5. Various websites
6. Psychologists
http://www.crnhq.org/
http://www.teambuildinginc.com/tps/031a.htm
http://ww w.humansolutions.org.uk/conflict-1.html
http://ww w.mindtools.com/pages/article/newLDR_81.htm
http://ww w.buzzle.com/articles/conflict-resolution-for-kids.html
http://ww w.suite101.com/content/conflict-resolution-styles-a44628
http://ww w.ohrd.wisc.edu/onlinetraining/resolution/aboutwhatisit.htm
http://ww w.ehow.com/how_4827949_teach-conflict-resolution-teens.html
http://ww w.pickthebrain.com/blog/resolving-conflicts-quickly-and-peacefully /
http://ww w.cyh.com/HealthTopics/HealthTopicDetailsKids.aspx?
p=335&np=287&id=1521
http://adv ice.cio.com/abdhiraj/
beneficial_consequences_of_conflict_behavior_in_an_organisation
Leisa Aitken, a clinical psychologist
BIBLIOGRAPHY