Communicating with your Athletes - ArbiterSports · personality Defensive, unapproachable....
Transcript of Communicating with your Athletes - ArbiterSports · personality Defensive, unapproachable....
COMMUNICATION
Taken from Successful Coaching by Rainer Martens
Communication
• Two dimensions of
Communication
• Six Steps of Communication
• Sending and Receiving Messages
– Sender/receiver failures
• Communication Styles
• Developing Skills
• Confrontation
• Two Dimensions of
Communication
– Sending and receiving messages
– Verbal and nonverbal messages
• Content (verbal) and emotion
(nonverbal)
Communication
Have a thought
Thought to
message
Transmit message
Receives message
Interpret message
Response to
message
Six Steps of Communication
• Sending Messages– Use eye contact
– Avoid potential distractions
– Reduce comments
– Check for understanding
• Receiving messages– Blocks to effective listening
• Asking too many questions
• Giving advice
• Being judgmental
• Agreeing or disagreeing
• Using clichés
Communication
• Communication breakdowns
– Sender failures
• Contradictory messages
• Verbal vs. nonverbal messages
– Receiver failures
• Misinterpreting messages
• Failure to listen
Communication
• Why Communication is
Sometimes Ineffective
– Stress
– Passion
– Importance
– The receiver
Communication
• Command-Style Communication
– Aggressive ordering
– Intimidating body language
– Do most of the talking
– Accuse and blame
– Little listening
– Shouting and attacking person
– May be successful for the short
term
Communication
• Submissive Style Communication
– Allows others to dominate the
conversation
– Seldom express own viewpoints
– Tend to express agreement
– Uncertain
– Avoids eye contact
– Avoids difficult issues
– Hates confrontations and conflict
Communication
• Cooperative-Style Communication
– Straightforward
– Positive
– Takes initiative
– Direct and constructive
– Good listeners
– Focus on moving the team forward
in a positive way
Communication
• Developing Your
Communication Skills
– Communicate with a positive
approach
• Provide honest, direct, and constructive
messages
• Avoid sarcasms and put downs
• Don’t sugarcoat the situation
• Respond to questions not statements
Communication
• Developing Your
Communication Skills
– Communicate with a positive
approach
• 3 Reasons some use the negative
approach:
1. HABIT of using the negative approach
2. Unrealistic expectations
3. Short term success
Communication
• Developing Your Communication Skills
– Developing credibility• Use a cooperative style
• Be knowledgeable/honest
• Be reliable, fair and consistent
• Express warmth, friendliness, acceptance, empathy
• Be dynamic, spontaneous, open
• Remain calm under pressure
• Use a positive approach
Communication
• Developing Your
Communication Skills
– Send messages high in
information
• Provide specific information when
answering questions
• Be certain you understand the reasons
for a person’s action before you judge
their behavior
• Focus on the behaviors not on the
person
Communication
• Developing Your
Communication Skills
– Communicating with consistency
• Follow through with what you say
• Avoid/discourage meaningless
conversation
• Develop a sense of trust by being
consistent
Communication
• Developing Your
Communication Skills
– Learning how to listen
• Show that you are interested in listening
and trying to understand
• Check that you understand by repeating
message
• Express empathy, not sympathy
Communication
• Developing Your
Communication Skills
– Categories of nonverbal
communication
• Body motion
• Physical characteristics
• Touching behavior
• Voice characteristics
• Body position
Communication
• Developing Your
Communication Skills
– Improving your nonverbal
communication
• Recognize how much of what you
communicate is in the form of nonverbal
messages
• Send and receive messages effectively
by using and reading body position,
body motion, voice characteristics
• Remember- what you do speaks louder
than what you say
Communication
• Confrontation
– Identify the problem
– Stop and think before acting
– Understand the other person’s
perspective
– Use an assertive style of
confrontation
• Own your own messages
• Use supportive messages
• State your needs
Communication
COMMUNICATION
SPECIFIC TO
GAME
PARTICIPANTS
Communicating With…
Game Participants
• How do we effectively
communicate with:
– Head Coaches
– Assistant Coaches
– Players
– Partners
– Others: Table Personnel, Game
Management, Trainers, Managers,
Officials’ Liaisons, etc.
Communicating With…
Others
• Always be professional
• Don’t be OVERLY friendly
• Don’t be high maintenance
• Make requests – NOT demands
• Everybody’s job is important
• No one wants to hear where you
were last night or your travel
woes
• The WALLS have EARS!
Communicating With…
Partners
• Try to go into every game with
positive thoughts about partners
• BE inclusive
• Don’t talk about one partner to
the other during the game
• Develop the skill of how to have
difficult conversations – don’t
ignore this part of partnering
Communicating With…
Partners
Instead of
saying…
“You
missed that
call.”
Try saying…
“Let’s talk
about that last
play. Tell me
what you
saw.”
Communicating With…
Partners
Instead of
saying…
“You are
not calling
the same
game as the
two of us.”
Try saying…
“We as a crew
don’t appear
to be on the
same page;
how can we
fix that?”
Communicating With…
Partners
Instead of
saying…
“You are
talking way
too much to
the
coaches.”
Try saying…
“We need to be
mindful of how
much we talk to
the coaches;
our actions
might be
misinterpreted.”
Communicating With…
Partners
• Time may not permit extended
conversations
• Don’t be confrontational on the
court – if a “spirited”
conversation is needed – take it
to the locker room
• The game is the most important
thing!
Communicating With…
Players
• Always be professional – say
“please” and “thank you”
• Use gender-neutral language
– NO: “girls,” “sweetie,” “honey” or
“doll”
– Avoid: “ladies”
– Try “players” or no reference at all
• Find a balance between friendly
and authoritative
Communicating With…
Players
• Certain non-basketball behaviors
must be addressed – Ignoring is
not an option
• Different situations call for
different types of responses/
communication – verbal and
non-verbal
Communicating With…
Players
• Types of responses:
– Observe
– Step in and be present
– Step in and actively diffuse
– Seek out and confront/warn
– Assess penalty
Communicating With…
Players
• Observe (non-verbal):
– Team huddles
– Celebrations – player or team
• Step in and be present (non-
verbal):
– Held balls
– Adjacent team huddles
– Celebrations near opponent
Communicating With…
Players
• Step in and actively diffuse
(both):
– Moderately contentious held balls
– Overlapping team huddles
– Celebration next to an opponent
Communicating With…
Players
• Seek out and confront/warn
(both):
– Very contentious held balls
– Celebration could be directed at
opponent
– Ball slammed down and caught
– Ball put on floor in defiance and
not given to official
– Discussion with official or
opponent approaches unsporting
Communicating With…
Players
• Assess penalty (both):
– Overt celebration at opponent;
finger pointing; obscene gesture
(taunt)
– Ball slammed to floor and
rebounds skyward
– Pushing, shoving, etc.
– Using profanity, etc.
– Rule 10-3.1
Communicating With…
Assistant Coaches
• Check your attitude – Asst.
coaches are people too!
• Our future Head Coaches!
• Don’t completely ignore
• Work through head coach if
communication becomes
excessive, distracting or
inappropriate
• Warn and penalize appropriately
Communicating With…
Head Coaches
• Remember about coaches:
– Inherently biased
– Inherently emotional
– Having a bias and being emotional
can lead to irrational behaviors
– When they ask a question –
sometimes they actually want an
answer
– Some may not want to hear
anything you have to say
Communicating With…
Head Coaches
• Remember about coaches:
– Coaches are ENGAGED in (and
maybe OBSESSED with) obtaining
a specific DESIRED OUTCOME…
– WINNING!
Communicating With…
Head Coaches
• Coaches & officials typically
have an adversarial relationship
• Coaches don’t always hear what
we are trying to tell them
(verbals)
• Coaches don’t always see what
we are trying to convey (non-
verbals)
Communicating With…
Head Coaches – VERBALS
When we
say…
“I thought I
saw your
player do
x…y…z.”
They hear…
“I really have
no clue what
just
happened.”
Communicating With…
Head Coaches – VERBALS
When we
say…
“That’s not
in my area, I
can’t call
that.”
They hear…
“I’m really not
paying
attention.”
Communicating With…
Head Coaches – VERBALS
When we
say…
“I got
blocked out
on the
play.”
They hear…
“I missed it
because I
was out of
position.”
Communicating With…
Head Coaches – VERBALS
When we
say…
“GET IN
YOUR
BOX!”
“SHUT-UP
AND SIT
DOWN!”
They hear…
“GET IN
YOUR
BOX!”
“SHUT-UP
AND SIT
DOWN!”
Communicating With…
Head Coaches – VERBALS
When we
say…
“It’s a 20-
point game,
we’re not
calling
that.”
They hear…
“The game is
over, I’ve put
my whistle
away.”
Communicating With…
Head Coaches – VERBALS
• Preferred statements:
– “I saw the play this way…”
– “I didn’t see the play you’re talking
about, I was watching this match-
up.”
– “My partner was on that play and
will tell you what they saw when
they are over here or during the next
dead ball.”
Communicating With…
Head Coaches – VERBALS
• Preferred statements:
– “Coach, I need you to stay in your
box tonight. This is your one
warning….stay in there for me.”
– “What are you seeing that
I’m/we’re missing?”
Communicating With…
Head Coaches – VERBALS
• Verbal communication tips:
– Do NOT tell a coach to “shut-up” or
“sit down” – they don’t have to
– Do NOT comment on the point
differential
– Be professional at all times
– Keep responses brief
– Do not initiate conversation
– Respond to questions – not
statements
Communicating With…
Head Coaches – VERBALS
• Verbal communication tips:
– Do not use sarcasm – it will backfire
– Be honest – don’t be afraid to admit
a mistake (once!)
– Know your audience/self
– Avoid engaging in small talk or
fraternizing
• Coach may be trying to gain an
advantage over opponent
• “Working” official
Communicating With…
Head Coaches – VERBALS
• Verbal communication tips:
– Selling your partners out doesn’t
make them LIKE you any better
– When possible, give explanations
using rule-book language
• Avoid officiating vernacular
• The rule book will keep you out of
trouble
Communicating With…
Head Coaches – VERBALS
• Rule-book language examples:
– “The ball is not dead until the try
ends.”
– “All she has to do is begin the
motion that habitually precedes the
release of the ball.”
– “The pivot foot was lifted before
the ball was released to start the
dribble.”
Communicating With…Head
Coaches – NON-VERBALS
When we…
Jog rather
than sprint
Sauntering
rather than
walking with
a purpose
They see…
Can’t keep up,
game has
passed you by
An attitude,
we don’t want
to be there
Communicating With… Head
Coaches – NON-VERBALS
When we…
Smile too
much
Never smile
Arms
crossed in
front or on
hips
They see…
We don’t take
this seriously
Irritable, too
serious, no
personality
Defensive,
unapproachable
Communicating With… Head
Coaches – NON-VERBALS
When we…
Frequently
talk to
partners
Never talk to
partners
They see…
We are
distracted,
unsure,
conspiring
Not a team
player, don’t
need and/or like
partners
Communicating With… Head
Coaches – NON-VERBALS
When we…
Take every
double
whistle
Give up every
double
whistle
They see…
Domineering,
trying to take
over the game
Too passive,
not confident,
unsure of calls
Communicating With… Head
Coaches – NON-VERBALS
When we…
Have weak
signals
Have overly
dramatic or
emphatic
signals
They see…
In over your
head, timid,
unsure of self
You are the
show and want
everyone to
look at you
Communicating With… Head
Coaches – NON-VERBALS
When we…
Frequently
talk to the
opposing
bench
Constantly
avoid bench
areas
They see…
You like them
better, you are
CHEATING
No spine,
paranoid,
unapproachable
Communicating With… Head
Coaches – NON-VERBALS
• Non-verbal communication tips:
– Be aware of your body language
when you speak or stand
– Convey strength by:
• Using sharp signals
• Walking with purpose
– Improve conditioning levels
– Maintain your humanity, but do it
professionally
Communicating With…
Game Participants
• Enhancing our communication skills
– both verbal and non-verbal:
– Makes for a smoothly and
effectively conducted contest
– Gives participants a sense that the
game is under control and is being
conducted fairly
– Provides a better experience for all
game participants
How do we respond?
Coach says…
• “The foul count is 7 to 1!”
• “Look down there, why is your
partner talking to Coach X, AGAIN?”
• “Are you guys going to call
traveling at all tonight?”
• “Are you related to Tim Donaghy?”
• “You must be on the take like that
NBA guy!”
OTHER HELPFUL
COMMUNICATION
TIPS OR
TECHNIQUES?