Cleveland State UniversityESC 720

Research Communications

Lecture 6 – The Writing Process, Effective Writing, and

Common Writing Mistakes

Dan Simon

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Outline

1. The Writing Process2. Writing Effective Sentences3. Common Writing Mistakes

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1. The Writing Process

Conduct ResearchWrite paperfor iteration = 1 to 100

ProofreadReviseIf (perfect) then exit loop

next iteration

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1. The Writing Process

Plan

Draft

Revise

Proofread

Iterate as needed

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1. The Writing Process: Plan

a. Research: Gather source materialb. Analyze your audiencec. Analyze your purpose (thesis statement)d. Organize and outline your document– Organization can be based on other

similar documents (papers, etc.)

e. Generate a schedule and budget

Plan

Proofread

Revise

Draft

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1. The Writing Process: Plan

• Items a, b, and c (Research, Analyze Audience, Analyze Purpose) are not necessarily in order– When writing a thesis or paper, Research is first• Research always includes literature review

– If you are rewriting a paper for a different audience or purpose, Analyze Audience or Analyze Purpose may be first Plan

Proofread

Revise

Draft

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1. The Writing Process: Plan

a. ResearchGoogle ScholarCSU Library: www.ulib.csuohio.edu– Research Databases: IEEE Xplore, INSPEC, …– Subject portals– Virtual Reference Desk– Journal Finder– SCHOLAR Online Catalog– OhioLINK Central Catalog– Interlibrary Loan

Plan

Proofread

Revise

Draft

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Journals at CSU

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1. The Writing Process: Plane. Generate a schedule and budget• This may not be required for some writing, but it

is for others (conference, proposal, thesis, …)• Create a thesis schedule:

1. “Final” copy of thesis to advisor2. Advisor spends two weeks reviewing3. Student spends two weeks revising4. Advisor spends two weeks reviewing5. Final copy of thesis to committee6. Committee spends two weeks reviewing7. Student defends thesis

Two months!

Plan

Proofread

Revise

Draft

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1. The Writing Process: Draft

Sit down and write!– Don’t worry about getting all the details correct …

but stay on topic– Leave blank spaces and notes to yourself for

material to fill in later (text, facts, figures, etc.)– This is a very rough draft, for your eyes

only. This is NOT the same as the Version A report that you will hand in for this class!

Plan

Proofread

Revise

Draft

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1. The Writing Process: Revise

a. Review your draft. Fill in the missing material. Correct grammar, spelling, figure placement, formatting, etc.

b. Find reviewers. Give them a deadline.– Expert reviewers– Target audience (peer reviews)

c. Accept criticism; learn from itd. Thank your reviewerse. Revise your paper

Plan

Proofread

Revise

Draft

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Outline

1. The Writing Process2. Writing Effective Sentences3. Common Writing Mistakes

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

• Avoid lists in formal writing – a technical paper is not a PowerPoint presentation

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

Too long (60 words):Given a system which can fail in one of several different ways, a fault detection and isolation algorithm uses sensor data in order to determine which fault is the most likely to have occurred, the effectiveness of which can be quantified by a confusion matrix, which indicates the probability that each fault is isolated given that each fault has occurred.

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

Too short (14, 17, 10, 17 words):Suppose we have a system which can fail in one of several different ways. A fault detection and isolation (FDI) algorithm uses sensor data to determine which fault is most likely. The algorithm’s effectiveness can be quantified by a confusion matrix. The confusion matrix indicates the probability that each fault is isolated given that each fault has occurred.

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

Just right (28, 25 words):Given a system which can fail in one of several ways, a fault detection and isolation (FDI) algorithm uses sensor data to determine which fault is most likely. The algorithm’s effectiveness can be quantified by a confusion matrix, which indicates the probability that each fault is isolated given that each fault has occurred.

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

• Focus on the real subject– The use of this method eliminates damage.– This method eliminates damage.

• Reduce the use of expletives, i.e., words that do not have a specific meaning– There is no better choice than FPGA technology.– FPGA technology is the best choice.

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

• Write actively – focus on the real verb– The simulations were run 100 times.– We ran 100 simulations.

• Use parallel sentence structures– The system costs time and is reducing profits.– The system is costing time and reduces profits.– The system costs time and reduces profits.– The system is costing time and reducing profits.

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

• Parallel sentence structures– After I arrived, I surveyed the scene, and then

my opponents were defeated.– I came, I saw, I conquered.– After I arrived, I surveyed the situation, and then

I defeated my opponents.

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

• Parallel sentence structures– Section 2 provides a review. Then we develop

the new algorithm in Section 3. Simulation results are presented in Section 4.

– Section 2 provides a review, Section 3 presents the new algorithm, and Section 4 provides simulation results.

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

• What does your modifier modify?– We measured tracking error, control effort, and

rise time. Method A only reduced tracking error.– We measured tracking error, control effort, and

rise time. Only method A reduced tracking error.– Superstition is a widespread phenomenon in

today’s society that should be destroyed.– In today’s society, superstition is a widespread

phenomenon that should be destroyed.

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

• The subject of the meeting is artificial intelligence in Compton Lounge.

• The subject of the meeting in Compton Lounge is artificial intelligence.

• Artificial intelligence is the subject of the Compton Lounge meeting.

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

• Dangling modifiers– Flying happily in the garden, I watched the bee.– I watched the bee flying happily in the garden.– This morning I shot a rhino in my pajamas.– This morning, while in my pajamas, I shot a rhino.– This morning I shot a rhino while I was wearing

pajamas.

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

• Dangling modifiers– We used a genetic algorithm with elitism to

determine if it could solve the problem better.– We used a genetic algorithm with elitism to

determine if it could solve the problem better than particle swarm optimization.

– We added elitism to determine if it could improve the performance of the genetic algorithm.

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2. Writing Effective Sentences

• Avoid obvious statements– The simulation finished in a nonzero, finite time.

• Avoid filler words– The new algorithm is basically simpler.– The new algorithm is essentially simpler.– The end result is a reduction in computer time.– The algorithm is better in each and every way.– The Accelerated Masters program is designed for

the best-of-the-best undergraduate students.

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Outline

1. The Writing Process2. Writing Effective Sentences3. Common Writing Mistakes

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

• Periods and commas should “always” be followed by a space.

• Commas should always be inside a concluding quotation mark.

• M.Dische, “Observations on the morphological changes of the developing heart”, Cardiovascular Clinics, vol. 4 (3), p.175 - 191,1972

• Exceptions: There are some exceptions; e.g., when a comma follows an abbreviation.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

• Hyphens are used to join words – dashes are used to separate phrases.

• Hyphens are shorter than dashes.• Hyphens never have spaces around them. • En dashes always have spaces around them

(except when used to indicate a range).• Em dashes never have spaces around them.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

• Hyphen: -• En dash: – (MS Word character code 0150)• Em dash: — (MS Word character code 0151)• Example: Time-invariant systems are easy to

understand – or at least they are easier than time-varying systems.

• Example: Time-invariant systems are easy to understand—or at least they are easier than time-varying systems.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Hyphens can be used for clarification• The guard captured five foot soldiers.• The guard captured five foot-soldiers.• The guard captured five-foot soldiers.• I resent your message• I re-sent your message. • I studied the contract and decided to resign.• I studied the contract and decided to re-sign.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Hyphens can be used for clarification• Next we study two state systems.• Next we study two-state systems.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Articles• The definite article “the” refers to a specific

instance. Indefinite articles like “a” and “an” refer to general cases.

• Example: We decided to use an FPGA to implement the algorithm. The FPGA that we used was an Altera.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

• The abstract should be self-contained with no references, usually 100–200 words, and summarizes the paper; it is often written last

• The introduction should contain:– Literature review and background– Detailed summary of the contribution of the paper– Overview of the paper

• The conclusion should contain:– Summary of the paper– Suggestions for future work

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Subsections• If you have Section 5.1, you must also have

Section 5.2 – a section cannot be divided into one subsection.

• Section headings should not be on the last line of a page of text.

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This is an example of bad writing becausethe last line on the page is a sectionheading.MS Word – Paragraph – Line and Page Breaks – Keep Lines TogetherLaTeX - Automatic

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Capitalization• Do not capitalize prepositions, articles, or

conjunctions, unless:– Every letter in the phrase is capitalized– The word appears first in a title

• of Mice and Men• Of Mice And Men• Of Mice and Men• OF MICE AND MEN

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Prepositions• Avoid ending sentences with prepositions– The adaptive H-bridge was the only other

topology we compared our method with.– The adaptive H-bridge was the only other

topology with which we compared our method.• In general, ending a sentence with a

preposition is a mistake up with which I will not put. However, this is only a general rule.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Parentheses• If a parenthetical phrase is at the end of a

sentence, the period belongs outside the parenthesis (like this).

• If an entire sentence is parenthetical, the period belongs inside the parentheses. (Here is an example.)

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Numbers• Integers should be spelled out if they are less

than 10, or if the number begins a sentence.• Integers should be written with numerals if

they are greater than nine. • Nineteen of the 20 experiments successfully

transformed lead into gold.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Numbers• Numbers should usually be written with

numerals if they are accompanied by units.• The power supply is five volts.• The power supply is 5 volts.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Numbers• 9,192,631,770 Hertz is the frequency of

cesium 133.• The frequency of cesium 133 is

9,192,631,770 Hertz.• Thirty-two degrees Fahrenheit is the

freezing point of water.• The freezing point of water is 32 degrees

Fahrenheit.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Capitalization• Capitalize proper nouns (people, places, titles

of books and papers and software)• Capitalize personal titles if they precede a

person’s name– I had a meeting with Professor Smith.– I had a meeting with Dr. Smith, my professor.– I had a meeting with my professor.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

Capitalization• Capitalize acronyms, but not their expanded

names, unless they should be capitalized according to the rules on the previous page.– We ran a Genetic Algorithm (GA).– We ran a genetic algorithm (GA).– We used an Integrated Circuit (IC).– We used an integrated circuit (IC).

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

• Capitalize words if they are named after a person, depending on general use– We used a Kalman filter– We used a kalman filter– We used a Fourier transform– We used a fourier transform– AC power is 60 hertz– AC power is 60 Hertz– The electronics run on 5 volts– The electronics run on 5 Volts

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

• Math symbols should always be italicized.• A minus sign is not the same as a hyphen.

A minus sign is an en dash (close enough).• The letter x and the asterisk * are not

multiplication signs.y = 3 - 2 x sin(z)y = 3 – 2 * sin(z)y = 3 – 2 sin(z) y = 3 – 2 sin(z) (but multiplication signs are discouraged)

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

• Define all math terms and symbols the first time they are used.

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3. Common Writing Mistakes

• A number is a word, and a unit is a word. Always separate words with spaces.– I had 11bananas for lunch.– I had 11 bananas for lunch.– We used a 5V power supply.– We used a 5 V power supply.

• I am aware that “everyone else” does it wrong. But we should do it right.

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References

• M. Markel, Technical Communication• L. Finkelstein, Pocket Book of Technical Writing• D. Simon, Technical Report Template, academic.csuohio.edu/

simond/courses/ReportTemplate.pdfNote: this is not a template for this course – it is a template for general use