Citizenship

CITIZENSHIP

a short comedy

by

Willy Conley

2008 Willy Conley Conley –

Characters:

ANNA EDBERG - Deaf female applicant from SwedenSIGN LANGUAGE INTERPRETER-IN-TRAINING – Hearing, maleIMMIGRATION SERVICES INTERVIEWER – Hearing, male

Time: PresentSetting: U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services in Baltimore

ANNA sits in the corner of the waiting room reading a magazine. The INTERVIEWER is doing mundane paper-pushing chores at his desk: stamping forms, shuffling papers, sharpening pencils, organizing paper clips, and etc.

The INTERPRETER enters, looks among the others in the waiting room, and takes a seat near ANNA. He doesn’t know what his client looks like. He stands and announces to no one in particular. ANNA does not see this.

INTERPRETER(in signs; no voicing)

My name is Bob. I’m here to sign interpret for someone named… Anna Edberg? I’m not sure of the spelling but…

Realizes that no one understands him.

(in voice)Never mind. Sorry to interrupt your…your wait.

The INTERVIEWER finishes his little desk chores.

INTERVIEWERNumber 352. 3 – 5 – 2.

(no response)352?

INTERPRETER(signs & speaks throughout except where noted)

Excuse me, are you Anna?

2


She nods her head.

Is your number 352?

She nods.

(to the INTERVIEWER)Uh, sir, we’re 352. I’m interpreting for a deaf client.

ANNAWhere’s Sheila Barton (sign name S.B. on the chest)?

INTERPRETERSheila Barton (S.B.) called in sick today.

ANNAI’ve never met you before.

INTERPRETERThat’s right, we’ve never met. I’m a new interpreter trainee.

ANNAYou’re a trainee?? Why didn’t I get someone certified? This is a very important interview. I must pass my U.S. citizenship interview.

INTERPRETERI’m sorry. There were no other certified interpreters available at the last minute. I promise I will do my best. Do you prefer ASL, ORAL, PSE, SEE I, SEE II, SIM-COM, Total Communication, the Rochester Method, Gesture, or Cued Speech?

ANNAASL, please.

INTERVIEWER352 please! I don’t have all day.

INTERPRETER lets ANNA know she’s being called in. During the interview, the interpreter translates in sign language what the interviewer says. The interpreter also voice interprets what ANNA signs.

3


INTERVIEWER looks at the application or at the INTERPRETER during this inquiry.

May I see your passport please?

ANNA hands over her passport to the interpreter. The interpreter gestures to give it to the interviewer.

ANNA(to the interpreter)

I thought YOU wanted to look at my passport. Always clarify who’s talking, ok?

INTERVIEWERIs there something wrong?

INTERPRETERNo, sir.

INTERVIEWERStop talking behind my back.

ANNAYou’re supposed to interpret what he said.

INTERPRETERHe was talking to me. Thought something was wrong.

INTERVIEWERYou are a citizen of Sweden, is that correct?

ANNAYes.

INTERVIEWERState your last name, and then your first name.

INTERPRETER signs “state” literally.

ANNAMaryland. Edberg, Anna.

4


INTERVIEWEREdberg is your middle name?

ANNAEdberg is my last name.

INTERVIEWERWhat is Maryland then?

ANNAMaryland is my state.

INTERVIEWERI did not ask you for the name of your state.

ANNAYou said state, last name, and first name.

INTERVIEWERI said “state your last name and then your first name.”

ANNAThe interpreter signed “state”.

INTERPRETERI-I-I apologize. I-I did sign “state” as in “There are 50 states in America.” I should’ve signed “say your last name...”

INTERVIEWERYes, you should have. Is 8512 Howell Street in Halethorpe, Maryland your current residence?

ANNAAre you asking the interpreter about his address?

INTERVIEWERNo, I am asking you.

INTERPRETERAre you asking me, sir?

ANNAThen, please look at me when asking questions.

5


INTERVIEWER(looking at INTERPRETER)

I am looking at you.

INTERPRETERDon’t look at me, look at her.

INTERVIEWERBut she can’t hear me. What’s the point?

ANNAI should let you know that the interpreter is just like a robot that translates information to help us communicate one-on-one.

INTERVIEWERIs 8512 Howell Street in Halethorpe, Maryland your current residence?

ANNAYes.

INTERVIEWERYou are applying for a United States citizenship?

ANNAYes.

INTERVIEWERWhat is your current occupation?

ANNATeacher of the deaf.

INTERPRETER pronounces “deaf” as “death”.

INTERVIEWERYou teach about death. So, your occupation is mortuary science? Pathologist? Funeral Service Director? What?

INTERPRETER fingerspells and gestures each occupation.

6


ANNAI don’t teach about death. I teach little deaf children.

INTERPRETER pronounces “deaf” as “death” again.

INTERVIEWERYou teach little children about death? I repeat: What – is - your – occupation?

ANNA writes something on a piece of paper and shows it to INTERVIEWER. She glares at INTERPRETER.

I see. Teacher of deaf children. Ok. I am going to ask you some citizenship questions. What do–-

The interpreter’s cell phone rings.

INTERPRETERExcuse me one moment . . . (speaks only) Hello? Yes. They have those in mauve? Oh goody! What?!? They gotta ship them all the way from Pakistan? How long will that take? Well, order two more while you’re at it, hon. Yeah, gotta go. Love you. Bye.

An incredulous silence.

INTERVIEWERI repeat: what do the stars on the U.S. flag represent?

ANNAThe fifty states in America.

While INTERVIEWER marks the application, she signs “thanks” sarcastically to INTERPRETER.

INTERVIEWERWhat is the first holiday that Americans celebrate?

ANNA(pause)

July 4th.

7


Wanting to help her out, INTERPRETER shakes his hand to warn her it’s the wrong answer.

Tell him, it’s July 4th.

INTERPRETER(signs only)

No, it’s Thanksgiving.

ANNAWhat??

INTERPRETER(signs only)

Turkey. Gobble-gobble.

INTERVIEWERI repeat: What is the first holiday Americans celebrate?

ANNAThanksgiving.

INTERVIEWERI will now ask you to stand and face the American flag.

ANNA stands facing the flag with her back to INTERVIEWER.

I will now ask you to recite The Star Spangled Banner.

(no response)

Whenever you are ready.

(no response)

(louder)

I said, whenever you are ready.

INTERPRETERExcuse me sir, she can’t hear you.

8


INTERVIEWER(loud)

I WILL NOW ASK YOU TO RECITE THE STAR SPANGLED BANNER.

INTERPRETERExcuse me sir, what I meant was she is deaf. She can’t hear you at all.

INTERVIEWERVery well.

Taps her on the shoulder.

I will now ask you to recite The Star Spangled Banner.

ANNAWell, I can’t sing but I can sign the words. My interpreter can sing what I sign.

INTERVIEWERVery well.

INTERPRETER(signs only)Me? Sing?? He said recite.

ANNA(to INTERPRETER)

Sing it. It might help me. Are you ready?

INTERPRETER nods his head. He does not voice this.

ANNAOh, I don’t know all of the words. Please fill in the missing words.

INTERPRETER nods his head.

Shall I count 1, 2, 3?

INTERPRETER nods his head; clears his throat. Words between brackets are what ANNA forgets. INTERPRETER sings his heart out despite not being a good singer.

9


ANNA will sign gibberish during parts of the song that she does not know. Her word order and rhythm are off, which influences the INTERPRETER’s rendition of the song.

ANNA1, 2, 3, Oh, say can you see, by the dawn's early light,[What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?]Whose broad stripes and bright stars, [through the perilous fight,O'er the ramparts] we watched, were so gallantly streaming? And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air, [Gave proof through the night that] our flag was still there. [O say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave. O'er the] land of the free and the home of the brave?

INTERVIEWERWipes his eyes with a handkerchief. We can’t tell if he was moved by the “beauty” of her signs or if he was wracked to tears by interpreter’s awful singing of the national anthem.

That will be all. Please step outside. You will be notified shortly whether you’ve passed your citizenship test or not.

INTERPRETER and ANNA sit in the waiting room. As the lights go down, ANNA has her eyes closed and fingers crossed in hopes of passing the test. INTERPRETER sits uncomfortable and insecure about his interpreting performance.

The End

10

Citizenship

Documents

Transcript of Citizenship