CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 1) Chapter 11: Interpersonal Conflict...
-
Upload
jared-jennings -
Category
Documents
-
view
245 -
download
0
description
Transcript of CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 1) Chapter 11: Interpersonal Conflict...
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 1)
Chapter 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict
Management
This multimedia product and its contents are protected under copyright law. The following are prohibited by law:any public performance or display, including transmission of any image over a network;
preparation of any derivative work, including the extraction, in whole or in part, of any images;any rental, lease, or lending of the program.
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 2)
Preliminaries toInterpersonal Conflict
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
1. Definition of interpersonal conflict Occurs when people are interdependent Mutually aware of incompatible goals See each other as interfering with achieving
goals
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 3)
Preliminaries toInterpersonal Conflict (cont.)
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
2. Myths about interpersonal conflict Conflict is best avoided Conflict is a sign of a troubled relationship Conflict damages a relationship Conflict is destructive because it reveals our bad
sides In conflict, there has to be a winner and a loser
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 4)
Preliminaries toInterpersonal Conflict (cont.)
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
3. Top interpersonal conflict issues for couples: Intimacy (physical and emotional) Power issues Personal flaws Personal distance/space Social Distrust
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 5)
Principles of Interpersonal Conflict
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
1. Conflict is inevitable2. Conflict can have negative and positive
effects Negative effects
Leads to bad feelings You close yourself off Increases costs
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 6)
Principles of Interpersonal Conflict (cont.)
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
2. Negative and positive effects (cont.) Positive effects
Resolves problems Improves relationships Demonstrates commitment to relationship
3. Conflict can focus on content and/or relationship issues Relationship conflicts – equity and power Relationship conflicts hide as content conflicts
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 7)
Conflict Management Stages
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
1. Unproductive strategies:1. Blaming (“It’s your fault– you’re so lazy!”)
2. Gunnysacking (storing up past offenses to unload later; ex. “All the times you arrived late to dinner.”)
3. Hitting below the belt (ex. Mentioning the inability to have children, b/c you know it will cause an emotional reaction)
4. Silencers (crying; feigning extreme emotionalism; screaming & pretending to lose control.)
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 8)
Conflict Management Stages (cont.)
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
2. Define the conflict Define both content and relationship issues Define the problem in specific terms Focus on the present; avoid gunnysacking Empathize Avoid mind reading
3. Examine possible solutions
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 9)
Conflict Management Stages (cont.)
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
4. Test the solution5. Evaluate the solution
Fact hat (focuses on facts and figures)
Feeling hat ( How do you feel when…?)
Negative argument hat (devil’s advocate)
Positive benefit hat (what are the upsides?)
Creative new idea hat (what other possible solutions?)
Control of thinking hat (have we solved the problem?)
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 10)
Conflict Management Stages (cont.)
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
6. Accept or reject the solution7. Wrap it up
Learn from the process Don’t let the conflict overtake your relationship Increase cherishing behaviors
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 11)
Conflict Management Strategies (cont.)
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
6. Verbal aggressiveness and argumentativeness strategies Aggressiveness
Unproductive Trying to win at the other’s expense disconfirming
Argumentativeness Should be cultivated Argue your point of view
CH 11: Interpersonal Conflict and Conflict Management (slide 12)
Conflict Management Strategies (cont.)
Copy
right
© 2
013,
200
9, 2
006
Pear
son
Educ
ation
, Inc
. All
Righ
ts R
eser
ved
6. Argumentativeness strategies (cont.) Cultivating argumentativeness
Be objective Avoid attacking the other person Reaffirm the other’s competence Avoid interrupting Stress equality Express interest in the other’s viewpoint Avoid being overly emotional Allow the other to save face