CBN_A6 7-29-11 ER

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Page A6 www.coastalbreezenews.com Jul 29 - Aug 11, 2011 EDITORIAL & LETTERS A special thank you to the following contributors: Donna Fiala, Tarik Ayasun, Nancy Richie, Vickie Kelber, Craig Wood- ward, Lou Thibeault, Doug Browne, Monte Lazarus, Capt. Rapps, Richard Alan, Frances Diebler, Matt Walthour, Paula Camposano Robinson, Patricia Huff, Natalie Strom, Christina Giorda- no, Danielle Dodder, Charlette Roman, Michael Usher, Gina Sisbarro, Joan and Carl Kelly, Nancy Richie, Anne Feinman, Bob Aylwyn, Steve Reyn- olds, Victoria Wright, Pierre Guesnon, Crystal Manjarres, Tara O’Neill and Joan Fuller. We appreciate sharing your special expertise with our readers! Editor’s Note: The opinions expressed in Coastal Breeze News columns are those of our contributors. We realize that there are many points of view and we invite you to write to us and share your opinions. Coastal BREEZE news VOLUME II - ISSUE 15 310 Royal Palm Drive Marco Island, Florida 34145 239/393-4991 office 239/393-4992 fax Publisher Valerie Simon [email protected] Features Editor Jeane Brennan [email protected] Administrative Assistant Jane Marlowe Marketing Consultant Marilyn Honahan [email protected] Circulation & Marketing John Patterson Production Karen Garcia Verla Winters © Copyright 2011, Coastal Breeze Publishing Company. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without the expressed written permission of the publisher. One copy per person allowed. Removal of copies in bulk, news racks or boxes is strictly forbidden and punishable by law. Use your Smart phone to scan our QR code to get to Coastal Breeze News website. Follow us on COMMUNITY SPIRIT S ome of you know that I have very close ties to the Ohio Amish commu- nity, so I’d like to tell you of a recent experience up there. I was visiting with my Amish friends and drove us all to the Ber- lin Firemen’s Festival, a fund raising effort held every year. The Firemen (all volunteer firemen) raise money to buy equipment by hosting this Festival and earlier in the year a Firemen’s Fish Fry. They cook all the Bar- beque Chickens, and serve them with cole slaw, salad, chips, rolls and homemade pie. There is no charge; it is a free-will donation. They also make delicious ice cream which they sell. A few food vendors are present, plus a climbing wall and bungee jumping for the kids. A water pressure contest is a lively part of the evening, and various mu- sical groups (mostly gospel and country music) perform all evening. There is an auction for a few items with the main item being a handmade quilt. This year that quilt drew almost $4,000. Approximately 2,000 people attended from the local commu- nity including Amish, Mennonite, English, school officials, elected officials, teachers, young people and retirees, all taking plea- sure in each other’s company, sharing sto- ries, enjoying the music, eating at the long tables together, meeting old friends and making new friends. As I sat there, I thought of Marco Is- land. That’s probably one of the biggest assets of living on Marco Island………..the Community Spirit. From the St. Paddy’s Day Parade to the Christmas Tree Light- ing, to all the many festivals and celebra- tions. These events bring us closer together and weave us into a strong community, working together for the benefit of our Is- land. Not many communities have this positive force that unites them. Even in the summer, when the numbers are down we still have fun events to enjoy together to keep that community spirit alive and well. As you read this column let’s count our blessings that we have this community spirit, this Island and these friends to share our lives. I know I count my blessings to be a part of Marco Island. COASTAL COMMENTS Donna Fiala donnafi[email protected] HOW TO BE ADMITTED TO THE E.R. WITHOUT REALLY TRYING It appears that there are two primary ways to be admitted to a hospital’s emer- gency room, whether for or against your own desires. The first, easiest, and proba- bly most expensive, is by ambulance. This may be the result of a sudden, serious physical problem, an accident, or even an assault by someone’s angry spouse. The latter is documented each day in the po- lice beat section of local newspapers. The second means is much slower. That is by being foolish enough to drive yourself, or by having a spouse, friend or enemy take you in. If you arrive by ambulance you can ex- pect to be placed on a cot (bed?) in a cu- bicle in the E.R. There you will be poked and prodded, asked many questions, vis- ited by many people in white jackets, in- cluding a few with stethoscopes. The real fun is when you just drop in unannounced. That’s when registration is tougher than getting into an Ivy League School. You, if you’re able to respond coherently, or you and your accomplice go into the waiting room. There, in the presence of other sad cases, you sit or lie impatiently counting clicks of the in- accurate clock. It clearly shows the time moving much too rapidly. Finally, the moment arrives. A nice lady calls your name, and the interrogation begins. You (or your companion) are asked to answer about 14 pages of important questions. They need your name, address, date of birth, social security number, telephone number, e-mail address, mother’s maid- en name, dog’s middle name (back to the end of the line if you do not have a dog or equivalent pet), emergency contact, medical history (including for men the date of your last pregnancy), name and address of doctor(s), favorite profession- al football team and a few less important questions. If you pass the exam you get a similar cot (bed?) to the ambulance patient who has been lying in his, her or its similar bed (cot?) for about five hours. Sometimes, as happened to me in SanFrancisco and Collier County, you are in a cubicle next to a junkie and/or non-recovering alco- holic. There is no entertainment value in that…although in San Francisco I was the subject of much attention, sweet treat- ment and apparent adoration of every E.R. nurse. No, it wasn’t my personality and certainly not my good looks; it was because out of 15 E.R. patients I was the only one not on drugs. I have witnesses. In truth, Collier County hospitals dealt with me very well. The serious look- ing doctors seemed to know their stuff; the nurses were good at sticking all sorts of things into my arms; and the trans- porters moved my gurney as well as any NASCAR driver. In a reasonable amount of time they move you to a real room and the medical care intensifies. Then, there’s the food. That’s another complete story. By Monte Lazarus [email protected]

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By Monte Lazarus [email protected] COMMUNITY SPIRIT A special thank you to the following contributors: We appreciate sharing your special expertise with our readers! VOLUME II - ISSUE 15 310 Royal Palm Drive Marco Island, Florida 34145 239/393-4991 office 239/393-4992 fax ome of you know that I have very close ties to the Ohio Amish commu- nity, so I’d like to tell you of a recent experience up there. I was visiting with my Amish friends and drove us all to the Ber- Follow us on

Transcript of CBN_A6 7-29-11 ER

Page 1: CBN_A6 7-29-11 ER

Page A6 www.coastalbreezenews.com Jul 29 - Aug 11, 2011

EDITORIAL & LETTERS

A special thank you to thefollowing contributors:

Donna Fiala, Tarik Ayasun, Nancy Richie, Vickie Kelber, Craig Wood-ward, Lou Thibeault, Doug Browne, Monte Lazarus, Capt. Rapps, Richard Alan, Frances Diebler, Matt Walthour, Paula Camposano Robinson, Patricia Huff, Natalie Strom, Christina Giorda-no, Danielle Dodder, Charlette Roman, Michael Usher, Gina Sisbarro, Joan and Carl Kelly, Nancy Richie, Anne Feinman, Bob Aylwyn, Steve Reyn-olds, Victoria Wright, Pierre Guesnon, Crystal Manjarres, Tara O’Neill and Joan Fuller.

We appreciate sharing your special expertise with our readers!Editor’s Note: The opinions expressed in Coastal Breeze News columns are those of our contributors. We realize that there are many points of view and we invite you to write to us and share your opinions.

CoastalBREEZEnews

VOLUME II - ISSUE 15310 Royal Palm Drive

Marco Island, Florida 34145239/393-4991 office

239/393-4992 fax

PublisherValerie Simon

[email protected]

Features EditorJeane Brennan

[email protected]

Administrative AssistantJane Marlowe

Marketing ConsultantMarilyn Honahan

[email protected]

Circulation & MarketingJohn Patterson

ProductionKaren GarciaVerla Winters

© Copyright 2011, Coastal BreezePublishing Company.

All rights reserved. No part of thispublication may be reproducedwithout the expressed written

permission of the publisher. One copy per person allowed. Removal of copies in bulk, news racks or boxes is strictly

forbidden and punishable by law.

Use your Smart phone to scan our QR code to get to Coastal Breeze News website.

Follow us on

COMMUNITY SPIRIT

S ome of you know that I have very close ties to the Ohio Amish commu-nity, so I’d like to tell you of a recent

experience up there. I was visiting with my Amish friends and drove us all to the Ber-

lin Firemen’s Festival, a fund raising effort held every year. The Firemen (all volunteer firemen) raise money to buy equipment by hosting this Festival and earlier in the year a Firemen’s Fish Fry. They cook all the Bar-beque Chickens, and serve them with cole slaw, salad, chips, rolls and homemade pie. There is no charge; it is a free-will donation. They also make delicious ice cream which they sell. A few food vendors are present, plus a climbing wall and bungee jumping for the kids. A water pressure contest is a lively part of the evening, and various mu-sical groups (mostly gospel and country music) perform all evening. There is an

auction for a few items with the main item being a handmade quilt. This year that quilt drew almost $4,000. Approximately 2,000 people attended from the local commu-nity including Amish, Mennonite, English, school officials, elected officials, teachers, young people and retirees, all taking plea-sure in each other’s company, sharing sto-ries, enjoying the music, eating at the long tables together, meeting old friends and making new friends.

As I sat there, I thought of Marco Is-land. That’s probably one of the biggest assets of living on Marco Island………..the Community Spirit. From the St. Paddy’s

Day Parade to the Christmas Tree Light-ing, to all the many festivals and celebra-tions. These events bring us closer together and weave us into a strong community, working together for the benefit of our Is-land. Not many communities have this positive force that unites them. Even in the summer, when the numbers are down we still have fun events to enjoy together to keep that community spirit alive and well. As you read this column let’s count our blessings that we have this community spirit, this Island and these friends to share our lives. I know I count my blessings to be a part of Marco Island.

COASTAL COMMENTS

Donna [email protected]

HOW TO BE ADMITTED TO THE E.R. WITHOUT REALLY TRYING

It appears that there are two primary ways to be admitted to a hospital’s emer-gency room, whether for or against your own desires. The first, easiest, and proba-bly most expensive, is by ambulance. This may be the result of a sudden, serious physical problem, an accident, or even an assault by someone’s angry spouse. The latter is documented each day in the po-lice beat section of local newspapers. The second means is much slower. That is by being foolish enough to drive yourself, or by having a spouse, friend or enemy take you in.

If you arrive by ambulance you can ex-pect to be placed on a cot (bed?) in a cu-bicle in the E.R. There you will be poked and prodded, asked many questions, vis-ited by many people in white jackets, in-cluding a few with stethoscopes.

The real fun is when you just drop in

unannounced. That’s when registration is tougher than getting into an Ivy League School. You, if you’re able to respond coherently, or you and your accomplice go into the waiting room. There, in the presence of other sad cases, you sit or lie impatiently counting clicks of the in-accurate clock. It clearly shows the time moving much too rapidly. Finally, the moment arrives. A nice lady calls your name, and the interrogation begins. You (or your companion) are asked to answer about 14 pages of important questions. They need your name, address, date of birth, social security number, telephone number, e-mail address, mother’s maid-en name, dog’s middle name (back to the end of the line if you do not have a dog or equivalent pet), emergency contact, medical history (including for men the date of your last pregnancy), name and address of doctor(s), favorite profession-al football team and a few less important questions.

If you pass the exam you get a similar

cot (bed?) to the ambulance patient who has been lying in his, her or its similar bed (cot?) for about five hours. Sometimes, as happened to me in SanFrancisco and Collier County, you are in a cubicle next to a junkie and/or non-recovering alco-holic. There is no entertainment value in that…although in San Francisco I was the subject of much attention, sweet treat-ment and apparent adoration of every E.R. nurse. No, it wasn’t my personality and certainly not my good looks; it was because out of 15 E.R. patients I was the only one not on drugs. I have witnesses.

In truth, Collier County hospitals dealt with me very well. The serious look-ing doctors seemed to know their stuff; the nurses were good at sticking all sorts of things into my arms; and the trans-porters moved my gurney as well as any NASCAR driver. In a reasonable amount of time they move you to a real room and the medical care intensifies.

Then, there’s the food. That’s another complete story.

By Monte [email protected]