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Brain Care is Self-Care

Promoting Resiliency:Student Success from CrayonsTo College and Career ReadyJune 11, 2014

Brain Care is Self-Care

Linda Graham, MFTwww.lindagraham-mft.netlinda@lindagraham-mft.net Bouncing Back: Rewiring Your BrainFor Maximum Resilience and Well-BeingI arise in the morningTorn between the desireTo save the worldAnd a desire to savor the world.This makes it hard to plan the day.- E.B. WhiteSelf Care: Antidote to Compassion FatigueOverwhelm of care for othersSelf-care drops off the radarEducators are vehicles for concern and careSelf-care: replenish and resource selfEnergy and bandwidth to care for others7 Rs of Self-CareReplenishRecognizeRegulateReflectResourceRe-FrameRe-Wire

ReplenishSleepNutritionMovement-ExerciseLaughterLearn Something NewHanging Out with Healthy BrainsSleepHousekeepingReset nervous systemConsolidate learning

Take mental breaksHow to Sleep WellStick to a sleep schedulePay attention to what you eat and drinkCreate a bedtime ritualGet comfortableLimit daytime napsInclude physical activity in your daily routineManage stress- Mayo ClinicTake Mental BreaksFocus on something else (positive is good)

Talk to someone else (resonant is good)

Move-walk somewhere else (nature is good)

Every 90 minutes; avoid adrenal fatigue

NutritionLess Caffeine

Less Sugar

More Protein

Movement - ExerciseOxygen brain is 2% of body weight, uses 20% of bodys oxygenEndorphins feel good hormones, brighten the mindBrain-Derived Neurotrophic Factor (BDNF) - grow new brain cells, will migrate to where neededLaughterIncreases oxygen and blood flow, reduces risk of heart disease and strokeReleases endorphins bodys natural pain killerReduces stress hormone cortisol, lowers blood pressureTriggers catecholamines, heightens alertness in brainReleases tension in body, balances nervous systemLaughterPromotes work productivityReduces stressPromotes creativity and problem-solvingReduces mistakes, increases efficiency Promotes group cohesionPromotes learning (through play)Eases loss, grief, traumaHow to Promote LaughterHumorA person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs jolted by every pebble in the road. - Henry Ward BeecherPlayPlay, in short, prepares the brain to handle the unexpected. Lee Alan DugatkinPlayful resonanceLaughter is the closest distance between two people. Victor BorgeLearn Something NewSpeak a foreign languagePlay a musical instrumentJugglePlay chessCrossword puzzles when you dont know the wordsHanging Out with Healthy BrainsBrain is social organ; matures and learns best in interactions with other brainsSocial engagement regulates nervous systemResonant interactions prime the brains neuroplasticity; promotes learning and growthRecognize Need for:Mindful Self-Compassion

Awareness of whats happening (and our reaction to whats happening)Acceptance of whats happening(and acceptance of our reaction)

Brain stays plastic, open to learningSelf-Compassion BreakNotice-recognize: this is a moment of sufferingOuch! This hurts! This is hard!Pause, breathe, hand on heart or cheekOh sweetheart!Self-empathyOf course this is painful, and Im not the only one; Im not aloneDrop into calm; hold moment with awareness; breathe in compassion and careMay I be free of suffering and the causes of sufferingShare experience with resonant otherCompassion for Others - SelfRemember moment of compassion and care for anotherEvoke felt sense of compassion in your bodyWhen flow of compassion is steadyPlace yourself in flow of compassion, care, concernRegulate: Keep Calm and Carry OnSerenity if not freedom from the stormbut peace amidst the storm.- author unknownHand on the HeartTouch Deep breathingPositive EmotionsBrakes on survival responsesOxytocin safety and trustRelationships as resourcesOxytocinHormone of safety and trust, bonding and belonging, calm and connectBrains direct and immediate antidote to stress hormone cortisolCan pre-empt stress response altogetherCalm through the BodyHand on the HeartBody ScanProgressive Muscle RelaxationMovement OppositeCalm Friendly Body ScanAwarenessBreathing gently into tensionHello! and gratitudeRelease tension, reduce traumaProgressive Muscle RelaxationBody cannot be tense and relaxed at the same time

Tense for 7 seconds, relax for 15

Focused attention calms the mindCalm through MovementBody inhabits posture of difficult emotion (40 secondsBody moves into opposite posture (40 seconds)Body returns to first posture (20 seconds)Body returns to second posture (20 seconds)Body finds posture in the middle (30 secondsReflect on experiencePower posingReflection Mindfulness comes to West:

Focused attention onpresent moment experiencewithout judgment or resistance.- Jon Kabat-Zinn

Reflection and ResonanceAwareness of whats happening(and our reactions to whats happening)Acceptance of whats happening(and our reactions to whats happening)

Mindfulness and empathy : two most powerful agents of brain change known to scienceMindfulnessPause, become presentNotice and nameStep back, dis-entangle, reflectCatch the moment; make a choiceShift perspectives; shift statesDiscern optionsChoose wisely let go of unwholesome, cultivate wholesomeNotice and NameThoughts as thoughtsPatterns of thoughts as patterns of thoughtsCascades of emotions as cascades of emotionsStates of mind as states of mindBelief systems and identities asMental contents, patterns of neural firingBetween a stimulus and a response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. The last of human freedoms is to choose ones attitude in any given set of circumstances.- Viktor Frankl, Austrian psychiatrist, survivor of AuschwitzResourcePractices

Places

PeoplePositive EmotionsGratitudeAweGenerosity CompassionDelight Serenity Love Curiosity Kindness Joy TrustPositive EmotionsLess stress, anxiety, depression, lonelinessMore friendships, social support, collaborationShift in perspectives, more optimismMore creativity, productivityBetter health, better sleepLive on average 7-9 years longerResilience is direct outcomeKindness is more important than wisdom,And the recognition of that is the beginning of wisdom.- Theodore RubinNeuroscience of Sharing Positive EmotionsSocial engagement systemDyadic regulationVagal brakeFusiform gyrus regulates amygdalaEmotional communication is 93% non-verbalRestores equilibriumGratitude2-minute free writeGratitude journalGratitude buddyCarry love and appreciation in your walletPositivity PortfolioAsk 10 friends to send cards or e-mails expressing appreciation of youAssemble phrases on piece of paperTape to bathroom mirror or computer monitor, carry in wallet or purseRead phrases 3 times a day for 30 daysSavor and appreciateCircle of SupportCall to mind people who have been supportive of you; who have had your backCurrently, in the past, in imaginationImagine them gathered around you, or behind you, lending you their faith in you, and their strengths in copingImagine your circle of support present with you as you face difficult people or situationsTake in the GoodNotice: in the moment or in memoryEnrich: the intensity, duration, novelty, personal relevance, multi-modalityAbsorb: savor 10-20-30 seconds, felt sense in bodyPlaces as ResourcesNature as refuge re-Source

We can create and notice shifts in perspective

Improve cognitive functioning and memoryShifting Perspectives in NatureBELLY BOTANYFind a one square foot patch of earth. Observe for two minutes.(light and shadow, movement and stillness, beauty and decay, life and death)Shift your view to the larger landscape, all the way to the horizon.Reflect on shift in perspective.People as ResourcesAt times our own light goes out and is rekindled by the spark from another person.

Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.- Albert SchweitzerI have learned that peoplewill forget what you saidand people will forget what you did,but people will never forgethow you made them feel.- Maya AngelouAttachment Styles - SecureParenting is attuned, empathic, responsive, comforting, soothing, helpfulAttachment develops safety and trust, and inner secure baseStable and flexible focus and functioning Open to learning inner secure base provides buffer against stress, trauma, and psychopathologyInsecure-AvoidantParenting is indifferent, neglectful, or critical, rejectingAttachment is compulsively self-reliantStable, but not flexibleFocus on self or world, not others or emotionsRigid, defensive, not open to learningNeural cementInsecure-AnxiousParenting is inconsistent, unpredictableAttachment is compulsive caregivingFlexible, but not stableFocus on other, not on self-world, Less able to retain learningNeural swampDisorganizedParenting is frightening or abusive, or parent is checked out, not thereAttachment is fright without solutionLack of focus Moments of dissociation Compartmentalization of traumaAttachment StylesSecure safety and trust, stable and flexible focus and functioning, open to learning, inner secure base provides buffer against stress, traumaInsecure-avoidant stable, not flexible, focus on self-world, not on other or emotions, rigid, defensive, not open to learning, neural cement Insecure-anxious flexible, not stable, focus on other, not on self-world, less able to retain learning, neural swampDisorganized lack of focus, moments of dissociation, compartmentalization of traumaTrue Other to True SelfThe roots of resilience are to be found in the felt sense of being held in the heart and mind of an empathic, attuned, and self-possessed other.- Diana Fosha, PhD

To see and be seen: that is the question, andthat is the answer.- Ken Benau, PhDShame De-Rails ResilienceShame is the intensely painful feeling or experience of believing we are flawed and therefore unworthy of acceptance and belonging.Shame erodes the part of ourselves that believes we are capable of change. We cannot change and grow when we are in shame, and we cant use shame to change ourselves or others.ReconditioningMemory de-consolidation re-consolidationLight up neural networks of problematic memoryCause neural networks to fall apart temporarily and instantly rewire by:Juxtaposing positive memory that directly contradicts or disconfirms;Focused attention on juxtaposition of both memories held in simultaneous dual awarenessCauses the falling apart and the rewiring

ReconditioningAnchor in present moment awarenessResource with acceptance and goodnessStart with small negative memoryLight up the networksEvoke positive memory that contradicts or disconfirmsSimultaneous dual awareness (or toggle)Refresh and strengthen positiveLet go of negativeRest in, savor positiveReflect on shifts in perspectiveWished for OutcomeEvoke memory of what did happenImagine new behaviors, new players, new resolutionHold new outcome in awareness, strengthening and refreshingNotice shift in perspective of experience, of selfRe-frameRegrettable Moment Teachable MomentWhats Right with this Wrong?Whats the Lesson?Whats the Cue to Act Differently?Find the Gift in the MistakeCoherent NarrativeThis is what happened.This is what I did.This has been the cost.This is what Ive learned.This is what I would do differently going forwardYou cant stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.- Jon Kabat-ZinnBrain Care is Self-Care

Linda Graham, MFTwww.lindagraham-mft.netlindagraham2@earthlink.net