Blog Entry Jan 2009 to May 18 2009

8/14/2019 Blog Entry Jan 2009 to May 18 2009

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Blog Entry Jan 2009 to May 18 2009

Entry for 18 May 2009

I was recently sent the following email:

“Posted to Craig's List Personals:

To the Guy Who Tried to Mug Me in

Downtown Columbus, night before last.

I was the guy with the black Bomber jacket that you

demanded I

hand over , shortly after you pulled the knife on me and my

girlfriend.

You also asked for my girlfriend's purse and earrings.

I hope you somehow come across this message. I'd like to

apologize.

I didn't expect you to crap in your pants when I drew my

pistol after

http://au.blog.360.yahoo.com/blog/slideshow.html?p=2528&id=1j59aAs3eKmOsvlZ1Zqytg--




you took my jacket. Truth is, I was wearing the jacket for a

reason that

evening, and it wasn't that cold outside.

You see, Chris my wife had

just bought me that Colt Model 1911 .45 ACP pistol for

Christmas,

and we had just picked up a shoulder holster for it that

evening.

Beautiful pistol, eh?

It's a very intimidating weapon when pointed at

your head, isn't it? I know it probably wasn't a great deal

of fun

walking back to wherever you'd come from with that

brown sludge

flopping about in your pants. I'm sure it was even worse

since you

also ended up leaving your shoes, cell phone, and wallet

with me. I

couldn't have you calling up any of your buddies to come

help you try

to mug us again.

I took the liberty of calling your mother, or "Momma"

as you had her listed in your cell, and explaining to her

your

situation. I also bought myself and four other people in the

gas



station this morning a tank full of gas on your credit card.

The guy

with the big motor home took 150 gallons and was

extremely grateful!

I gave your shoes to one of the homeless guys over by

Vinnie Van Go

Go's, along with all of the cash in your wallet.

I threw the wallet in a fancy pink "pimp mobile" parked at

the curb after I broke the

windshield and side window out and keyed the driver's

side. I called a

bunch of phone sex numbers from your cell phone. They'll

be on your

bill in case you'd like to know which ones. Ma Bell just

shut downthe line, and I've only had the phone for a little over a day

now, so

I don't know what's going on with that. I hope they haven't

permanently cut off your service.

I could only get in two threatening

phone calls to the DA's office and one to the FBI with it.

The FBI guy

was really pissed and we had a long chat (I guess while he

traced the number).

I'd also like to apologize for not killing you and instead



making you walk back home humiliated. I'm hoping that

you'll

reconsider your choice of path in life. Next time you might

not be so lucky..

- George

P.S. Remember this motto...... an armed society is a polite

society!

All you can ever be is yourself. Trying to change yourself

to find, please, or keep a partner is futile since your perfect

mate will love you for yourself, not your attempts to be

your version of his/her ideal. After all, it's just that -- your

version!

OPEN YOUR EYES, LOOK IN FRONT OF YOU. AND

REALLY SEE WHO YOU ARE, AND WHAT YOU

BELIEVE IN!!!! “

Below was my response.

I'm most appreciative of the paragraph at the end about

looking at self. I'm glad I'm not like the letter writer. I can't

say what I'd do if in that situation with those circumstances

since I don't carry a gun. I do know I'm not likely to make

all those calls on the cell phone or use the credit card. No

real telling if it belonged to the mugger and I may have

just been causing more problems for another victim. I

believe since we are energy beings the energy we put outextends beyond us. Often we have a choice to continue the

cycle of fear based in reactive behaviors’ intent on causing

hurt back to those who hurt us. It is very human and

something I'm not over. The other option seems to be the

one Jesus teaches which is to stop the cycle of hurt back.

As God's Son the power was there to take actions to keep

Him from the cross and overpower those seeking to kill

Him. It's clear He knew it was going to happen yet Hemade a conscious effort to choose a path of Love. He



chose this path as example but more to give each of us

hope that when we fail and act out in anger, fear and

disregard for others that we can be forgiven. So I pray for

both men that they may find forgiveness and grow in

Christ. I lift up all those who seek revenge rather than love

in this world knowing when I look at the log in my eye

that too often it is revenge that is my first response impulse

far too often. I know I can't change others only me. I hope

as I grow in my relation with Christ I can learn to follow

his example. It's strange that as I started my response here

I was motivated by my anger at the original writer’s

reactivity (His get even attitude of superiority even though

he mentions having a wife and girlfriend). As I wrote I felta change come on as I saw myself in him and so I leave

hoping for his healing as I hope for mine.

Ok from here are thoughts specifically for the Blog,

I don’t purport to have all the answers. What I share here

are all part of my search and some of the things I learn.

Here is a short response to someone who asked me how to

get a woman? I read your question with many questions

from my abstract mind. Getting a woman to me implies

ownership. I don’t know how to do that. It is perhaps a lot

of what is wrong in most romantic relationships this idea

that the other belongs to me, a kind of slavery. I when my

wife was alive attempted to have that and all I got was her

pulling away from me. One of my life lessons has been to

learn that by letting go often we get something more or

better. It is kind of a paradox like so many spiritual lessons

seem to have. What I’m saying is just be a human being to

other human beings with care and love and out of that

friendships and relationships seem to grow. I suspect this

is why so many wish to join me as a friend here at 360

even though Yahoo only allows 300 friends. I know if I

had the knowledge of how to personally communicate

with everyone in the best most personal way possible



within the small space of time I seem to get when I come

here I would make attempts. I’m not a miracle worker, that

is God’s role. I do know I can be myself as best I know

here. So my answer to you is be yourself, know yourself,

open yourself to love as best you can for as you learn to

love yourself as Christ loves you do you learn to love

others. This love seems to be attractive and draws others to

want this something that feels missing in most people’s

lives. I used to think it was missing in mine and why I

used to live a life of depression. The reality is God is

always close by and only our thinking keeps God and

others away.

Entry for 02 May 2009

On Love and Emotions

The following was stimulated by an email to me. I’ve edited out some of the

identifying things to others. The background to this reflection is a discussion

about the role of emotions in our lives and if it of value to hide from them or feel them.

My thoughts:

I too see the need for emotions and feeling them. I've never gotten from the

course (A Course In Miracles) that you block or ignore them. I keep saying

they are signposts as to where we are. We do have the ability once felt to

question them rather than just keeping them going round and round turning

them into story or pain body. The thing is feelings are all temporary yet when

we follow ego we somehow tend to extend feelings into drama keeping certain

ones around longer than need be. Mainly because I suspect we don't learnfrom them when they first come up. Part of the issue is around not looking at





our beliefs around feelings. We humans tend to judge feelings giving them

positive and negative value. We dislike and attempt to avoid sadness, anger,

envy etc... Most of us seek to happiness as a life goal as if one could walk

around in a permanent state of happiness. Even the Dali Lama wrote a book on

being happy which I suspect many bought with the idea that one can learn to

be happy all the time. When people are interviewed as to what they want fromlife most answers that come back are to being happy. A friend had it right

recently when she said that she is finding peace is with her. Peace is different

than happiness. Peace isn't a feeling it is a state of being and interconnected

with Love which I again say is a decision and not a feeling. (That feeling we

get when we think we are in love is to me not what real Love is. It does have

various emotions attached at those times but (and this is my personal belief)

Real Love is just another name for God and the temporary feeling are things

like Romance, infatuation, feeling warm, feeling close, In the bible St. Paul

shares with the Corinthians the following.

"4 Love is always patient and kind; love is never jealous; love is not boastful or conceited,5 it is never rude and never seeks its own advantage, it does not take offence or

store up grievances.6 Love does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but finds its joy in the truth.7 It is always ready to make allowances, to trust, to hope and to endure

whatever comes.8 Love never comes to an end. But if there are prophecies, they will be done

away with; if tongues, they will fall silent; and if knowledge, it will be done

away with.9 For we know only imperfectly, and we prophesy imperfectly;10 but once perfection comes, all imperfect things will be done away with.11 When I was a child, I used to talk like a child, and see things as a child does,

and think like a child; but now that I have become an adult, I have finished

with all childish ways.12 Now we see only reflections in a mirror, mere riddles, but then we shall be

seeing face to face. Now I can know only imperfectly; but then I shall know

just as fully as I am myself known.13 As it is, these remain: faith, hope and love, the three of them; and the

greatest of them is love."

http://www.catholic.org/bible/book.php?id=53&bible_chapter=13

When I read this each time I am reminded that none of those things arefeelings but are more connected to a committed decision in spite of what the

so called worldly circumstances appear to be. Now I know I fall short on being

patient in every circumstance but when I am awake and aware I'm more likely

to choose to be patient because I see the outcome I want won't come from

reacting to a temporary feeling. This doesn't mean I don't feel the feeling. I can

still feel hurt, disappointed in another and so on but how I act on those feelings

is where the choice really is. It is interesting that patience thing is also

applicable to me too when I have reacted and ended up not being loving. I do

draw hope in this reading as well because I seem to have an affinity with vs 12

about currently only seeing reflections and not face to face.

This reading is Core with me when I consider Love.

http://www.catholic.org/encyclopedia/view.php?id=5889





















when I do it. That is just the way things are. I write here often because I learn

from what I write. A Course in Miracle's says we teach what we need to learn.

That certainly has been the case in my blog. Right from the start I've been

learning from all my posts. I've discovered some readers also learn from it and

that is just an extra. I'm very blessed that God seems to use me in that way

from time to time. For awhile there I even got a bit big headed about it all andstarted to to believe some ego hype I was getting about my importance.

Getting back from it has helped me to see that I best write when I'm just

sharing with me even if it is kind of public here. I'm still very aware that some

people will feel that by connecting with me personally they might be able to

shortcut to something they are looking for or gain some kind of insight by

associating with me and perhaps that could happen. In most cases though I

suspect anyone who may have come here and found real growth it is because

they took the thoughts here and did the work and found their own truth which

may not even be related to what I share. I do pray God will help others

through me and so I do write publically but it might be as much through my

bad example as for any positives I might share. God does have a plan for all of us. We can be open and attempt to follow or we can fight and He'll use us

anyhow. Anyhow if you like what you've read there is more of this in past

posts so give it a try as you are more likely to know me better from that than

attempting to have one to one's with me these days. You can try. If I'm in and

something connects because the question is honest and real to me and not just

part of the mass of things I usually get I might respond a few times. There are

very few here I visit regularly anymore. My 3d world is busier but Normal 0

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language:#0400; mso-bidi-language:#0400;} occasionally someone proves

they actually are reading and want to extend and give back through what their

response is.

As always your real answers are inside you and not externally. Stop listening

to that louder insistent voice of ego/painbody/devil and make space for the

quieter voice of God that whispers how much you are loved. Develop a

relationship with that voice and Christ will be resurrected in your life. Thistime between Easter and the coming of the Holy Spirit is a special time for

many to run into Jesus unexpectedly as He reveals His Presence.

Entry for 01 February 2009



I’d like to start this post with a reading I was given last Wednesday that

connected something for me.

“Matthew 16, 24-25

Then Jesus said to his disciples, ‘If anyone wants to be a follower of mine, let

him renounce himself and take up his cross and follow me.

Anyone who wants to save his life will lose it; but anyone who loses his lifefor my sake will find it.”

What clicked for me was what happens with giving up ego and putting God

first. At some point when we’ve finally gotten tired of being built up and let

down by ego’s ways we can start to make a choice and say know to the worlds

promises of fun, power, control, money, sex and all that entices. When we do

we take up our cross (the difficulty at saying no to provocative ego images that

would have us stay thinking this one last time might give me what I seek in

this worldly experience) It is a cross because we are convinced the answers lay

outside of ourselves and so what is offered is outside and worldly. The second

part then comes in: “Anyone who wants to save his life will lose it.” Think hanging on to worldly pleasure and things outside of self leads only to inner

emptiness eventually and so we lose out because we feel with the question:

What’s it all about? And was it really worth it? The emptiness is death while

even here on earth. “but anyone who loses his life for my sake will find it.”

Giving up ego and looking within to find God’s voice speaking and calling

one does lose one’s past life or way of living. What Jesus seemed to be saying

to Nicodemus when asked; How can a grown man be born again? Giving up

the world and ego and seeking God opens us up to Peace with and a deeper

more meaningful life because we start to share a vision based in real Love.

What follows below is a response I posted to friends regarding an incident thatcaused some feelings that immerged. This response is what led me later to the





above conclusion so share it here to hopefully give some context as to why

that reading meant what it did to me.

Jesus encompassed the law into two. The first was about Loving God totally

with your whole being (to me means being at One with God.)

The second Love your neighbour as yourself . Too many times the sermons

one hears gives the impression that one make the neighbour more

important and when we do it allows ego to exploit our insecurity about

ourselves. When we recognize we are in this and called to also Love

oneself a shift can happen. I'm not talking narcissism here which is ego

based. Allowing the recognition that God Loves me to really mean

something. This is where that other saying: greater Love hath no man

than to lay down his life for another. This can be seen as placing our ego

aside in order to see our oneness with the other. In a way it is a kind of

recognizing the ego in the other and seeing it in self and being willing to

transcend the relationship. Move the relationship to a higher level. Can't

do it till we see what we have been doing and want to try something

different. It also means taking a risk because the other may not be ready

or in the same place. Here's where the forgiveness comes in that Jesus

said when asked how often we forgive? The reply was seventy times seven

times meaning over and over. The one who understands has a

responsibility to be an example of Love.

Few I suspect really see the bigger picture well enough to live at this level.

I'm only just getting an intellectual handle on it as I type and try to think

this through. The action comes when it is ingrained into living I suspect. Itis a part of the person. I suspect this is where authority also comes from

because when it is lived it produces energy and power that gets through

ego much more easily.

I'm optimistic for staying open I see we are being given an opportunity to

transcend a bit as a group. Each of us was doing what we do and the mix

brought up some fear here for each of us to learn from and move through.

No one to me has been good or bad right or wrong; but just sharing and

responding from where we were to what seems to be happening is

bringing us to a new place if we remain open.

Gift of Spirit in human hearts prayer





It seems the words I wrote to go with this picture aren't posting so in short a

prayer.

May we move from government that forces us to be chairitable to Spirit led

people who share our gifts and talents from God's love recognizing abundance

comes by all sharing and no one coming from fear which only holds us back from doing what is life giving to all including self.

Again to those who try to contact me I get far more contacts than I can share

with individually so please be content with what I share here and know your

answers lay within your own silence listened to with Love and Peace. Find

that and you can be released from fear which only holds you back.

Frank

Blog Entry Jan 2009 to May 18 2009

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