Billy the Kid & Peter and Jesus - Skit Guys

7/25/2019 Billy the Kid & Peter and Jesus - Skit Guys

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Grace, We Just

Dont Get It

Themes: grace, mercy, forgiveness,acceptance, Gods character

Defending the world from bad dramaone skit at a time.


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Grace, We Just Dont Get It: NYWC


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Grace, We Just Dont GetIt: NYWC

byEddie James and Tommy Woodard

What: Grace can be such a hard concept to grasp, even

for some of the strongest Christians.

Who: Tommy

Billy- confuse and slightly neurotic 4-yr-oldSheldon- a high-schooler with trust issues

JesusEddie

Sunday School teacherMitch- a youth pastor

Peter-the disciple of Christ

When: Present

Wear (Props): Bible for Sheldon

Why: Romans 8:38-39

How: Its possible to use as many people as you want in this skit toplay each character, even having a separate narrator. Thecomic timing, especially with Sheldon and Mitch, is tricky butimportant. Be sure to keep the scenes moving, without a lotof down time in between. To watch Tommy and Eddieperform this skit, go to www.skitguys.com.

Audience: High School or Adult Worship

Time: Approximately 10-12 minutes


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Eddie andTommy address the audience.

Eddie: Wed like to talk to you about grace and what that looks like.

Grace: it means undeserved favor.

Tommy: Grace is kind of Gods crazy love. Its hard to wrap your mindaround it.

Eddie: We dont even understand the concept of grace even when werelittle kids.

(Scene one- Tommy becomes Billy and Eddie becomes the Sunday School teacher)

Eddie: Alright, class, Im going to be your substitute Sunday Schoolteacher this morning.

Tommy: Hi, Teacher.

Eddie: Hi, how are you? Whats your name?

Tommy: My names Billy. Like the goat. (makes a goat sound)

Eddie: Okay, well your real teacher couldnt be here.

Tommy: Yeah, she was talking to the erasers.

Eddie: Did you have anything to do with that?

Tommy: Maybe!

Eddie: Well, class, I was looking over the curriculum. The Pastor calledme this morning and asked if I could fill in. I didnt feel like I had

a choice, so here I am. So were going to be talking about gracethis morning.

Tommy: Yeah, Grace! I know Grace.

Eddie: You know what Grace is?


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Tommy: Yeah, shes in my other class.

Eddie: No, this is a different type of grace.

Tommy: Yeah, I like her.

Eddie: No, this is a different type-

Tommy: Shes pretty.

Eddie: No, no, no. This is a different type of grace. Okay? Grace islikewell what grace isyou know what? Ill teach you through asong.

Tommy: Okay!

Eddie: Its about a man named Zaccheus.

Tommy: Oh! Zachariah!

Eddie: Zaccheus.

Tommy: Zucchini.

Eddie: No, Zaccheus.

Tommy: Zoology.

Eddie: Just stick with me buddy. Zaccheus. Okay?

Tommy: Zoo Zoo!

Eddie: Alright, hang in there. Jesus showed grace to Zaccheus.

Tommy: Oh yeah! Jesus is nice.


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Eddie: Yes he is. Okay, heres how the song goes. Okay, it goes like this:(begins to sing) Zaccheus was a wee little man- (Tommy giggles)BillyBilly? What is it? Whats the matter?

Tommy: You said wee! (continues fit of giggling)

Eddie: Okay. Alright. How old are you, Billy?

Tommy: Im four.

Eddie: Need you to be a mature four. More mature, more mature, moremature. (through each mature Tommys face gets more serious) Okay.

Thats fine.

Zaccheus was a wee little man (Tommy bursts into laughter again).Billy, wee means small.

Tommy: It means something else too!

Eddie: Alright. Mature four, mature four, mature four, ninety-five yearsold. (again through each mature Tommys face is more serious). Okay,here we go. Zaccheus was a wee little man, and a wee little man

was he.

Tommy: (uncontrollable laughter)You said wee-wee!

Eddie: Yes, I did. My bad. Okay, mature four, more mature, moremature, almost dead. There we go! Zaccheus was a wee little manand a wee little man was he. He climbed up in a sycamore tree-

Tommy: Oh! What did you say?!

Eddie: He climbed up in the sycamore tree- (Tommy cries)

Tommy: Whats wrong with the tree?

Eddie: Theres nothing wrong with the tree, Billy. He climbed up in thesycamore tree


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Tommy: You said it was sick. (bawling) You said it was sick more.

Eddie: No, no I did not.

Tommy: This is a horrible song! Its about dying trees and youre teachingit to children! Mickey Mouse doesnt sing about dying trees! Werejust children! You hate the forest.

Eddie: Billy, listen to me. More mature, more mature, more mature, inthe grave. Sycamore is the name of a tree. (Tommy cries again)

Tommy: The tree was sick because it was wee-weed on isnt it!

Eddie: No, no, no. Zaccheus was a wee little man (Tommy laughs) and a

wee little man was he. He climbed up in the oak tree-

Tommy: Okay! I like the oak tree. Its a healthy oak tree. Its oak-kay.

Eddie: Yes it is. (continues) For the Lord he wanted to see.

Tommy: Oh! Jesus is coming!

Eddie: Here he comes.

Tommy: No, he cant come. I dont have my bowtie on.

Eddie: No, in the song, Jesus is comingin the song. And as the saviorpassed his way-

Tommy: Here comes Jesus!

Eddie: Yes, hes coming. Hes going to bring grace with him.

Tommy: I didnt know she knew him!

Eddie: Nojust hang with me. So as the Savior passed that way helooked up in the tree. And he said, Zaccheus!

Tommy: You quit wee-weeing on trees, cause youre killin em!


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(end of scene)

Eddie: We dont really get the concept of gracethis crazy type of love--even when were in high school.

(Scene two- Tommy becomes Sheldon, a teenager and Eddie becomes Mitch, the youthpastor)

Tommy: Hey, Mitch.

Eddie: Hey, Sheldon.

Tommy: Hey, Im getting ready to go in to Bible Study.

Eddie: Yeah, Ill be in there in just a minute.

Tommy: No, listen before you go in thereyoure my youth pastor so Ishould come to you about these things.

Eddie: Whats the matter?

Tommy: The last question on the Bible Study doesnt make sense.

Eddie: What are you talking about?

Tommy: Well its base on Romans 8:38-39, right?

Eddie: Right.

Tommy: And that last question, what can separate you from the love ofGod? the answers not in there.

Eddie: It is. Its one word.

Tommy: Its not in there.

Eddie: It is, its right there.


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Tommy: I read it. Its not in there.

Eddie: Im telling you its in there Sheldon.

Tommy: Okay, Bible Man! Show me.

Eddie: Well, we could do that in there.

Tommy: Show me!

Eddie: Alright. Romans 8: 38, it says For I am convinced that neitherdeath nor life, nor angels nor principalities, nor things present northings to come, nor powers nor height nor depth, nor any othercreated thing will be able to separate us from the love of God,

which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Tommy: See it doesnt say.

Eddie: Yes it does.

Tommy: No it doesnt.

Eddie: Yes it does. Its one word.

Tommy: Exactly.

Eddie: It says nothing.

Tommy: Exactly!

Eddie: Thats the word.

Tommy: Exactly?

Eddie: No, no. Im trying to tell you its nothing.

Tommy: Nothing?

Eddie: Yes, its nothing.


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Tommy: No dont give me nothing, give me something.

Eddie: Im trying to tell you that the something is nothing.

Tommy: What planet are you from where something is nothing?

Eddie: Here it is. Something is nothing.

Tommy: Oh thats great! So you want me to go in there and say nothing.

Eddie: Yes.

Tommy: You call on me and say Hey, Sheldon, what do you think? and

Ill go Nothing.

Eddie: Yes!

Tommy: Oh thats rich! Thats great. You will say Sheldon, what do youthink the answer is? and Ill just go (makes a face with his mouthtightly shut and shaking).

Eddie: If you did that youd be a constipated C-3PO. No, what I want isI want you to go in there and I want you to say something

Tommy: Yes! But what is the something? What is the thing you want me tosay?

Eddie: Nothing. (Tommy has a small fit)

Tommy: I dont care if youre a man of the cloth, I want to hit you!

Eddie: Im trying to help you out here. Im your youth minister. Im justtrying to help.

Tommy: You want me to go in there and do nothing.


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Eddie: No I want you to go in there and do something if that somethingis what you use to say nothing. And if you say nothing thenthat my friend, Sheldon that nothing is really something.

Tommy: Youre a freak. (starts to leave, but comes back) Nothing?

Eddie: Nothing.

Tommy: You said nothing.

Eddie: Nothing.

Tommy: Yeah, but not for me, because you dont understand.Im.ImIm not

Eddie: Nothing.

Tommy: No, no, no listen. Just last night

Eddie: Nothing.

Tommy: No, I

Eddie: No matter what you want to put out there as an excuse for God

not to love you, theres nothing that can separate you from thelove of God. Nothing.

(end of scene)

Tommy: (to audience) So if youre having trouble grasping Gods grace dontbeat yourself up, because the truth is even the disciples didnt getit.

(Scene 3- Eddie becomes Peter and Tommy becomes Jesus)

Eddie: Jesus, I cant believe its you! I mean here you are alive! You werecrucified and in the tomb and then here you are right here! I knewit! I knew it when I put the net on the other side and all these fishcame in the net and I thought who could have done that? And


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then I look over and there you are on the shore saying It is I, theLord and then here you are right here! I cant believe its you! Imean its amazing! So what are you doing here?

Tommy: Peter, do you love me?

Eddie: Oh Jesus. I love you with everything that I am. I mean I cantbelieve youre alive. I mean youre right here on the shore lookingat me with those eyes! Oh I love you with everything that I am.

Tommy: (calmly) Peter, do you love me?

Eddie: Oh yes, Jesus. I love you! And Im so sorry for running away. Imso sorry for the whole rooster debacle. I didnt know! You said a

rooster would cluck and it did cluck!

Tommy: Peter?

Eddie: Yeah?

Tommy: Do you love me? Do you?

Eddie: Jesus, mere words could not describe the passion that I have foryou. With everything that I am, I love you. With everything that I

have, I love you.

Tommy: Then feed my sheep.

Eddie: I didnt even know you had livestock.

Tommy: Peter, that day that the Marys came running up, do youremember what happened?

Eddie: Yes, they came running up and sounded like she was saying Bee

hive! Bee hive! Bee hive! and Im allergic to bees so Im likekeep em out if you know what Im saying. But as she keptgetting closer I heard her saying Hes alive! Hes alive! she wentto the tomb and an angel of the Lord was there and if John sayshe beat me hes totally lying. I beat him. And we got there and


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there was an angel of the Lord and he said Go tell the disciplesand Peter that everything is okay. He is risen.

Tommy: What did he say?

Eddie: He said, Go tell the disciples and Peter that everything is okay.He is risen. And here you are! Youre risen!

Tommy: I know. What did he say?

Eddie: He said, Go tell the disciples and Pe You said my name. Yousaid my name. After I denied you three times and I ranyou saidmy name. Why did you say my name? Why did you say my name?I totally left you. Why did you say my name?

Tommy: Peter, thats my grace. Its not about you. You cant do anythingtoo bad. Its not about what youve done, its about what I justdid. I say your name because I love you Peter. Its forgiven. Itsforgotten. Thats grace.

The End.

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Billy the Kid & Peter and Jesus - Skit Guys

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